Jagwire

Joke

Q. What did one volcano say

to the other volcano?
A. I lava you!

Whats inside...
Pg. 2 Tu es Charlie Hebdo?
Pg. 3 Valentines Day Features
Pg. 4 How Single Are You?

Century High Schools Official Student Newspaper since 1997

Volume 18 Issue 4

2000 SE Century Blvd Hillsboro, Oregon 97123

February 9, 2015

Ke i r a C o n n e r S o a r s w i t h S p a r r o w C l u b

By Geniver Garcia
Reporter

Keira Conner is two

years old and is the daughter
of Century math and graphic
design teacher, Jeremy Conner.
Keira suffers from Congenital
Disorder of Glycosylation
Type 1-A. It is a disorder that
prevents Keira from being able
to metabolise sugars, which
negatively impacts her body
system.
Because of this
condition, Keira is not able to
fully physically and mentally
function. She was diagnosed
around the time that she was
5 months old. However, Mr.
Conner revealed that he noticed,
Keira wasnt developing or
gaining weight like other kids
her age, so we took her to the
hospital, they ran some tests and
we found out.
When asked what a
normal week for his family
was, Conner explained that its,
similar to most families- its
just different because of all the
doctors she sees. Keira has to
have weekly physical therapy
sessions as well as doctor visits
that vary throughout the week.
Sparrow Club has adopted

Keira and they are now accepting

donations to benefit her.
Sparrow Club is a youth
based charity that helps children
who suffer from complicated
illnesses. It was founded in Bend,
Oregon in 1995.
Mr. Conner heard of
Sparrow Club through PAC
teacher, Trevor Smith. Smith
explained that, The idea of
Sparrow Club is basically to match
up kids with needs with [other]
kids. No money is needed to help
out Keira, students simply have to
give through service.
For every hour of
community service completed, $10
are donated to Keira. A total of up
to 256 hours can be earned after
that, schools are encouraged to
raise even more money.
Smith wants students
to know that, youre not only
helping Keira, youre helping your
community. Forms are available
in the main office for those who
would like to participate. The
actual money collected from
the hours of community service
completed is given by the Portland
based charity, Mission: Salt +
Light. Whether it be financially or
emotionally, Mission: Salt+Light

Keiras family at the Sparrow Club assembly. Photo Credit: Oregon Live
prides itself in helping their
surrounding community. Mission:
Salt+Light has already donated
the $2,560 dollars to Keira and
knows what Century will earn it
through service for her.
Mr. Conner and his wife
are thankful for all the support
theyve received. They also want
people to know that they arent
just sharing Keiras story for the
financial benefit that it brings.
Mr.Conner explained that, this

money would go to help Keira

have more physical therapy
options, but were doing this
more for awareness.We want
to help students go on to do
something positive.
When asked what Conner
and his wife hope will come
from sharing Keiras story, he
put it simply: We like the idea
of people understanding our
situation and we want to show
Keiras strength.

Slow and Steady Computers Wont Win the Race

Students distressed by their computers. Photo Credit: Steven Driskill

By Lauren Weber
media center, especially during
Reporter
class time. When my class goes
to the media center, I log on to a
Sit down at a computer.
computer, but then I usually give
Control, alt, delete. Username,
up because theyre too slow to
password, enter. Wait for five
get anything done, junior Korrin
minutes Check the clock.
Mohr said.
Watch the screen load for ten

The computers in
more minutes. Check the clock
Centurys media center are out
again, and theres five minutes
of date, as theyve been hard at
left in lunch, you still have to
work serving procrastinating high
print your paper, and the circle
next to the cursor is still spinning schoolers for about ten years. And
the age shows, not only in the
around, around, around.
huge, bulky size of the monitors,
Many students use the

but also in the sluggish processing

speed.

Recently, the computers
batteries have been leaking acid,
causing parts of the computers
to corrode. These monitors are
10 to 12 years old, Ms. Harvey,
Centurys tech wiz said. Thats
the problem, theyre just old.

Although it isnt an
imminent health hazard, leaking
battery acid is obviously not ideal.
Will it [the corroded capacitors]
blow up? Probably not, Harvey
explained. But could it blow up?
Yes.

Even though getting rid
of the old monitors and buying
new ones seems like a simple fix,
it isnt. Out-of-date, battery-acidleaking computers is a problem
across many of the schools, and
the district simply doesnt have
the money to replace them.

Many of the labs at
Century have newer computers,
which run at light speed
compared to the desktops in
the media center. But the media
center is a resource for students, a
hub for finishing math homework,
getting help at the writing center,
or typing up a paper. With all this
activity, the media center should

have more efficient technology to

assist students through the trying
times of high school.

Luckily, Ms. Harvey has
an idea to replace some of the
old computers. Id love to start
a technology drive, to reach out
to community and hopefully
fill the shortfall, Harvey said.
If students want to donate old
tablets, old laptops, anything
really, they can drop it off in the
main office or my tech room [in
the media center].

Ms. Harvey assures that
all donated technology will be
wiped clean and resurfaced,
ready for a students use.

Not all students have
the technology or wifi required
for completing all assignments
at home. Many rely on the
media center to do research for
a project or type up a lab report.
And lacking technology only
hinders their ability to complete
assignments on time.

With the districts lack of
funds, it doesnt sound like the
dinosaurs, sorry, computers, will
be replaced anytime soon. But
with a technology drive, Century
may be able to get rid of the
corroding machines eventually.

Opinions
Page 2

Century High School Jagwire

Je Suis Charlie Hebdo

By Geniver Garcia
Reporter

On January 7th, a
group of terrorists attacked the
offices of the French satirical
newspaper, Charlie Hebdo.
Prior to the incident, Charlie
Hebdo published a cartoon of the
prophet Muhammad, which is
not allowed in the Islamic faith.
After the attack, many
people used social media to show
their support for the newspaper
with the hashtag, #JeSuisCharlie.
This not only demonstrated
support for France, but for
freedom of speech as well.

We dont
apologize for a joke.
We are comics.
-Joan Rivers, RIP
Although Charlie Hebdo
offended those terrorists as well
as people of the Islamic religion,
it does not justify the killing of
12 journalists. The newspaper is
satirical, its supposed to mock
and offend people. Charlie
Hebdo hasnt only offended the
Islamic religion, but Christianity,
Judaism, and Buddhism as well.
Satire should never be
censored and we shouldnt
live in a world where we need
to be afraid of being killed for
publishing something as trivial

as a cartoon. Being offended is

subjective and art of any form
should never be edited to please
those who do not understand it.
Freedom of speech and
fear were also seen in the recent
Sony hackings over the movie,
The Interview. The movie was
not released in many theatres
because terrorist threats were
made to those who did choose to
screen it.. The Interview offended
North Korea and others, but its
a movie and regardless of its
appeal to you, its a comedy and
has the right to be screened and
watched. As a film enthusiast, I
know that there have been many
movies in cinematic history that
people did not approve of, but
approval over something isnt
the point. Its about freedom of
expression.
I agree with what
Charlie Hebdo did. I agree with
what Seth Rogen and James
Franco did. I dont believe in
apologizing for comedy. Joan
Rivers said it best, We dont
apologize for a joke. We are
comics. We are here to make you
laugh. If you dont get it, then
dont watch us.
I am a journalist and I
believe in freedom of speech and
of the press which is why Je
Suis Charlie Hebdo.

The Direction For Success

Dear X,

So like I want to marry Harry Styles or Zayn Malik,

but they dont know I exist. What should I do?

-Anonymous

February 9, 2015

Je Ne Suis Pas Charlie Hebdo

By Wendy Roman
Reporter

On January 7th, France

experienced what many are
donning The French 9/11.
12 people, including two
policemen, were killed in a three
day siege by members of an
Islamic extremist group. Since
then, people around the world
have rallied behind the phrase,
Je suis Charlie Hebdo, or I
am Charlie Hebdo, in solidarity
of the right to free speech and
press.
However, as a journalist,
I do not identify with Charlie
Hebdo.
To begin with,
before any assumptions are
made, the explanation of the
intersectionality in Frances
struggles must be laid out.
For years, French
believers of Islam, French
Muslims, have experienced
systematic discrimination in
forms of Islamophobia and even
an anti-immigration movement
by a steadily growing French
political group.
Through the years
Charlie Hebdo has established
itself as a leading satirical
publication that has run
images of the Islamic Prophet
Muhammed, directly going
against Islamic beliefs.
I am not Muslim.

I am a humanitarian. I
do not believe in a religion, or a
governments right to dictate its
peoples beliefs. Instead, I believe
in human progress and equality.
I am sorry that blood
was spilled and that innocent
people lost their lives. But
simultaneously, I do not believe
people should rally behind this
magazine.
Supporting Charlie
Hebdo means to rally with the
terrorists, whose main purpose
in these attacks is not only to
wrongfully represent the religion
of Islam, but also to create an
anti-Islamic sentiment amongst
a population, in order to isolate
and corrupt Muslims into joining
their extremist cause.
Charlie Hebdo was
misguided. In its effort to
promote insurrection and to
promote Ad Hominem,
they purposefully published
images and ran stories to attack
beliefs and offend millions. The
purpose of satire is to speak the
unspeakable, to turn into the
voice of the people who do not
have one.
Instead of having four
million march in grievance,
four million should march in
solidarity that includes French
Muslims and promotes the
union of a country, not backlash
towards the innocent.

Dear Anonymous,

So, heres what you have to do. You need to
get training to become a bodyguard and slowly work
your way up. One day your boss will ask you if you
will take a job to protect the men of One Direction.
You will calmly say yes, and then while you guard
their god-like bodies, you will get to know both of
these boys. Get close to them, one is bound to fall for
you. The one that does will most likely ask you on a
date. Say no, say your relationship is strictly business,
but if it were any other situation that maybe it would
work. Play hard to get, itll make you look more
desirable. He will try again if he truly wants you. If
he does ask you again, say yes. But make it clear you
have to keep it under wraps so you dont get fired.
Now you are on a sure path to marriage.

Match Maker,

X.
Jagwire Staff
Editor-in-Chief
Wendy Roman
Layout Editor
Lauren Weber
Tori Black
Natalie Fossoy
Reporters
Melanie Trask
Marissa Godwin
Nathan Nakonieczny
Geniver Garcia
Sydney Rush

Photographer
Steven Driskill
Advisor
Adam Billington
Contact Us at Century HS
By Phone:
(503) 848-1861
By Fax:
(503) 848-1861
Address:
2000 SE Century Blvd
Hillsboro, OR
97123
Vol. 18 Iss. IIII

The Jagwire, the official student newspaper of Century High School,

upholds the right to students to exercise the freedom of expression
guaranteed by the First Amendment of the Constitution of the United
States, and the Oregon State Constitution.
We believe that students have the right to report on and editorialize
about controversial and crucial events in the school, community, nation
and world. They also have the responsibility to report accurately and
fairly.
We encourage our readers to respond through Letters to the
Editor. Letters to the editor will be printed as written, except in case of
obscenities, libelous information, or personal attack. Please limit your
letters to 300 words and submit via email, or to Adam Billingtons box in
the main office.
Signed columns will reflect the opinion of the writer of the column
and not necessarily the Jagwire editors and staff, adviser, or the
administration.

Backpage
Page 4

Century High School Jagwire

February 9, 2015

Stuck In Love Playlist How Single Are You?

1. Cater 2 U - Destinys Child

2. Little Things - One Direction

3. Besame Mucho - Thalia ft. Michael Buble
4. All of Me - John Legend
5. If I Aint Got You - Alicia Keys
6. Gravity - Sara Bareilles
7. Adorn - Miguel
8. Shes Got a Way - Billy Joel
9. When A Man Loves a Woman - Percy Sledge
10. The Nearness of You - Norah Jones
11. Someone To Watch Over Me - Amy Winehouse
12. These Broken Hands of Mine - Joe Brooks
13. One Man Guy - Rufus Wainwright
14. Valentine - Kina Grannis
15. If You Stay - Joseph VincenT

Perfect Pick-Up Lines

For Precious People

1.
2.
3.
4.

I seemed to have lost my number, can I have yours instead?

Do you live in a cornfield? Because Im stalking you.
If I were a cat, I would spend all 9 lives with you.
I like Legos, you like Legos, why dont we build a
relationship?
5. On a scale of 1-10, youre a 9 because Im the 1 you need.
6. If I had a garden Id put my two-lips and your two-lips
together.
7. Do you have a band-aid? I scraped my knee falling for you.

Heart To Heart

1. What are you plans for Valentines Day?

A. Dinner with the rents.
B. Netflix and ice cream.
C. Turning up with all your close friends.
D. Go to a movie with a living, breathing person that knows
your first name.

2. When you open your text messages, who is the most recent contact?
A. Twitter notifier.
B. Your grandma.
C. Your bestie 5ever.
D. A possible romantic interest.
3. What are you wearing on Valentines Day?
A. Your snuggie on top of a shirt stained with pizza grease.
B. Your spongebob pjamas.
C. Some jeans and a cool shirt.
D. Something that says, Young, Wild & Free.
4. What is the last gift you received?
A. Costco free samples.
B. Free garlic bread with your large pizza.
C. Dutch from your bestie.
D. Some heart shaped chocolates from a thirsty individual.
5. When you are on the internet, what are you most likely doing?
A. Answering comments your grandma left on your Facebook
photos.
B. Watching the latest episode of Bobs Burgers on Netflix.
C. Scrolling through tumblr, and building up your follower
count.
D. Liking a picture a cute individual just posted on instagram.
Mostly As: We are sorry to inform you, but you are so very, very
single. Your love life is like Mordor, one does not simply walk into it.
However, if you are happy with your lifestyle, keep doing your thing
and never fear, a Frodo will come along one day.
Mostly Bs: Youre still pretty single, but not as much as the As up
there. The most action you get is answering the door and smiling at
the pizza guy, who is seriously beginning to consider how one person
can eat so much za.
Mostly Cs: You, my friend, have found true relationship status
serendipity. In your life, there is no need for a status change on
Facebook because your friends are better company than any romantic
interest, any day.
Mostly Ds: Congrats. You are like a water bottle in the middle of
the Sahara, everyone is thirsting after you and if you play your cards
right, there is a definite relationship status change in your future.

Valentines Day Jokes

Q: Do skunks celebrate Valentines Day?

A: Sure, theyre very scent-imental!

Q: Why did the cannibal break up with his girlfriend?

A: She didnt suit his taste.
Q: Why do Valentines have hearts on them?
A: Because spleens would look pretty gross.

DATES TO KNOW
February 9th - 13th: Think Pink Week

Need Advice?
Submit letters with your advice-worthy problems to the
library or email us at theofficialjagwire@gmail.com to get

Xpressive Advice From X.

February 21st: Winter Formal (A Night Under the

Northern Lights)
February 17th-20th: Class Officer Campaign Week
March 9th - 13th: ASB Campaign Week
March 13th: Man of the Century
March 16th: ASB Senator Packets Available

Features
page 3

Century High School Jagwire

What To Do When Single

On Valentines Day

February 9, 2015

Painless Gifts
By Marissa Godwin
Reporter

Photo By: Steven Driskill

By Nathan Nakonieczy
Reporter

Valentines Day is great.
All the roses, candy, and love
blossoming in the air. Unless youre
single. in all honesty, nothing is bad
about being single. But you have
to admit it kind of sucks when the
two people next to you cant keep
their faces away from each other.
So heres a list of things to do when
youre single on Valentines Day.
1.
Be your own date. You will
always be there for you, dont trust
another person with your emotions.
Youll never dump yourself
(assuming youre mentally stable)
and you wont get yelled at for silly
things you do. Eat all the chocolate.
Buy some roses, thank yourself for
them. Go on a solitary gondola ride.
Just love yourself.
2.
Send yourself cute texts under
an alias. Nobody ever said it wasnt
fun to pretend- especially when
youre pretending to be someone

with undying love for you. Just drop

a cute, Love you baby glad youre
my only- brad : P or something
along those lines. No one has to
know Brad isnt real.
3.
Watch horror movies. If all else
fails you can imagine that ditzy chick
running from a serial killer, is your
best friend, who ditched you for her
boyfriend. Or you can snuggle into
a pillow, scarred for life, pretending
its a significant other. Horror is a
great way to make an awful day
better, with all the blood and guts- at
least the color matches the theme.
With all the love and kisses floating
in the air, you wont have to worry
as long as you find something to
occupy the time, and make you
forget its a celebration emphasizing
your loneliness.

Lets Cement The

Meaning of Consent
By Natalie Fossoy
Reporter
Valentines Day is just
around the corner, which for some
means celebrating with their special
someone. But for others, the holiday
comes with an uncomfortable social
stigma.
Lets call it the putting out
system, and not unlike eighteenth
century England, it involves
economics and fabric. Crudely put,
the more he spends, the more he is
expecting you to take off. But this
perception is wrong.
In order for anything
to happen, consent is required.
According to Mrs. Owens, a
health teacher here at Century,
consent means both partners have
been very open about all of their
expectations, especially in a sexual
relationship, and both partners
agree on all the terms...and no other
terms get to be thrown in the mix;
its whatever was agreed upon. For
couples who openly communicate
their intentions and desires, consent

is a very light subject.

But for others, its not. Some
people dont even know what consent
is. Is consent flirting? Is it consensual
if they dont go to the police? Is it
possible to be in a relationship and for
one-half to think its consensual and
for the other half to think something
different?
In regards to this, Mrs.Owens
says, I think that thats a very typical
thought: that most people think oh
were in a relationship so anything
is okay because weve decided that
we trust each other. But even in
a relationship - even in a married
relationship - if youre going to try
something new or if youre doing any
experimenting...I think there is always
that necessity to get consent right
up front. So I feel like unfortunately,
while the accused person might very
well feel like they didnt do anything
wrong... if you havent communicated,
and if you havent gotten the okay,
then the victim is still the victim.

A junior and senior desmonstate the stereotypical profession of love

Photo By; Marissa Godwin
heart into a letter for your darling, let
Valentines Day gifts can
them know that your heart lies with
get hecka expensive. Do you want
them.
a cheap way to please your honey
Anonymous foxy female, a
bun? A cheap way to make your
senior said, Chocolates from dollar
lady friend or man-hunk smile?
tree. And her equally foxy coy friend
Well arent you in luck, main man.
said, Collage their face on some
Cheap gifts can be found
construction paper. With hearts!
anywhere, but heartfelt gifts are a
Priceless ideas, quite literally.
little harder to get. Cheap heartfelt
Our dreamy chef, Jared
gifts well, they are dang near
Willis, senior, said, Make them some
impossible to get your grimy little
food. Like cupcakes and stuff, maybe
fingers on. But we have found a
make them chocolate hearts. Maybe
scientific way to make these things
a Mad-libs valentines card to wrap it
coexist.
all up.
Century hunk master, Sean
If youre still having trouble
Tellvik, a junior, said, You could
with finding your smoochum a cheap
write a meaningful letter, or make a
gift, Pintrest. Pintrest will save you
theme card, draw something nice.
my friend. So make your sweetheart
A cheap and sweet way to make
swoon at a cheap coast during this
your bae swoon is to pour your
Valentines Day.
To go even further,
sophomore Josh Coughlin adds, The
idea of consent being sealed with the
title of a relationship, even a false one,
is extremely wrong. A relationship is
something built off of communication
and permission, its not automatically
given at the beginning. Also, the
calling of the police isnt what
specifies rape either, as long as
consent isnt given, its rape.
Its important to note that
most non-consensual rape cases rarely
make it to trial, primarily due to
victim-blaming.
Consent is an important topic
on a societal level. Being educated
helps prevent harm to both men
and women. So how is consent
communicated? The easiest answer to
this question is to define what consent
is not;
Flirting is not consent. It
doesnt matter what is said long
before action, especially over text. The
only thing that matters is what is said
in person right before, and if youre
not sure if theyre saying yes, ask.
If youre comfortable enough to be
with them, you should be comfortable
enough to ask.
Being in a relationship
is not consent. Just because you
call someone else boyfriend or

girlfriend does not mean anything

is expected or should be procured
without a yes first.
Weve done it before is
not consent. No can be said at
anytime and its okay and should
be taken seriously, and if its not,
find someone who does, or tell
them or someone you trust if youre
uncomfortable.
He/She didnt say no is not
consent. This isnt math class: two
negatives do not make a positive.
No can be said through speech,
but also through body language.
Listen to what your partner is saying,
even if they arent saying anything
at all. And if your partner cant say
anything because theyre too drunk,
tired, or stoned, take that as a no.
Consent is a clear and
audible yes.
If youre having problems
or you know someone who is, talk
about it with someone. Ultimately,
the best place to go is to an adult but start where youre comfortable.
Please be safe this
Valentines Day and establish a line
of communication with your partner
or someone you trust.