Be the One

WE'VE ALL MADE mental lists describing our perfect

guy. But how "perfect" are you? Are you equipped to
create lasting love? Working on yourself-tine-tuning
positive attributes, getting rid of bad habits and learning
how to be in a relationship before you're actually in one-
will help build a successful partnership. Here's how.
What? Tak.ing stock. Get mad
Me, work.? Erika Valdes, 22, lODesk.ills
When things rarely expressed Make a list of past
go downhill with . her desires, beaus and note
a man, we letting men drive personality traits
often focus on relationships. She you'd like to see
his shortcomings lost sight of who (or avoid!) in
and overlook she was and, after future partners.
our own, says one particularly Keep ajournal
Jennine Estes, bad breakup, about problems
a San Diego- felt 50 depressed like trust
based marriage that she developed issues caused
counselor. But a stress-induced by a cheating
we often bring skin condition. ex. Learning to
in baggage from Her doctor's communicate
past relationships, prescription: soul- better-and
poor conflict searching. Erica disagree-is
resolution skills or started meditating essential for a
low self-esteem- and reading solid partnership.
things that can self-improvement A good place
torpedo a growing books, and to start is with
bond. Avoiding is currently in good friends.
them takes front- a healthy new "Friendship is
end work while relationship where a safe way
you're still single. she's not afraid to to practice how
The upside? assert herself. To to share your
"When you have boost your feelings, talk as
all your ducks own self-esteem, a team," Estes
in a row, you will the classic says, "and address
.( attract the same strategy of saying conflict instead
.... affirmations-
'" kind of person," of avoiding it."
o
o Estes says. repeating a list of -Damarys Ocana
"'
>
o your own positive
MAKE TIME
"'
w
:J: characteristics- FOR SEX
... works.
o IF YOUR BUSY schedules are
>
'" causing your passion to fall
w
....
a: by the wayside, then listen up:
=>
o Make an appointment for a sex
o
N session pronto, and stick to it!
'" Schedule in a time when you
oo can both set everything aside,
....
~ forget about your to-do lists
e
e
o
a:
....
. Cute Couple and enjoy your time together.
Besides, everyone knows
e
;;
"'
of the Month it's the perfect stress reliever.

e HEADY ACOSTA, 24, OF BAYSIDE, H.Y., AHD

,;: CHARLES BUSTAMAHTE, 26, OF WEST POIHT, H.Y.
o
....
::!;
o
:::
w
en
.
Dating for three years

You're getting married soon. How will his

military service affect you?
LaTina
.COt}.
~
'" "The thought of a deployment makes me
'-' nervous, but with him I've developed a
g
o mentality that helps me cope with things that
.;
:J: I can't control. Plus, I admire the fact that he
0.
"' is committed to serving his country without
a:
" hesitance, regret or fear. I know that when the
o.....
o:J: time comes, it will be hard. but our love will
0. see us through the roughest times."

APRIL 2009 . LATINA.COM 61