Chapter Four

‘…Yea and then he started doing this crazy thing with his tongue on my
right nipple but it felt banging! And then when he was fingering me yea
it was like he was digging for gold or something I swear down.’ Rayanne
explained her story to me.
Three days had passed since Dion’s birthday; Rayanne had come round
my house to conversate and share gossip as we normally did. She was
telling me what had happened after she had left Dion’s house with
Solomon.
‘You Gimmie joke Ray Ray…did it hurt?’
‘Mmm… Nah not really, at first it did a bit. Sooo what did you and
Dion do?’ She asked nudging me playfully.
‘…Mmm nothing much, just…stuff.’ A huge grin spread across my face,
I always found it hard lying to Rayanne.
‘You’re such a bad liar! You slept at his yard at your tryna tell me
nothing happened. Come on, I told you.’ She begged.
‘Alright we lipsed.’
‘And…?’
‘…He fingered me.’
‘I knew something happened! When I called you I could tell something
was going on. Did it hurt?’
‘When he used one finger it was cool but when put the second one in it
killed!’ I told her, remembering the pain.
‘You know why, it’s because you’re a virgin. That’s the same thing with
me, I can’t handle two but once you’ve had sex two fingers will be
nothing. Was that the first time someone used two fingers on you?’
‘…That was the first time I’ve been fingered.’
‘Awwwww, that’s so cute. Did you tell Dion?’
‘No.’
‘Why not?’
‘I don’t know I just don’t want him to think…hold on my phones
ringing.’ I said picking up my phone from the bed; Ramal’s name
appeared on the screen.
‘Yea what?’
‘Where are you?’ Ramal asked.
‘At home, why?’
‘Oi come park.’
‘Why…who’s there?’ I asked.
‘Just a couple man in it. Me, Jordan, Jerome, Solomon, Derrick and
some others.’ He told me.
‘Alright, we got nothing else to do.’
‘Wait who you with, is Jessica There?’
‘Nah It’s just me and Rayanne. We can knock for her.’ I suggested.
‘No way.’
‘Erm Ok. See you then.’
‘Yea yea cool.’ He said and hung up.
I put my phone in my pocket and turned to face Rayanne who had
helped herself onto my computer and was now on MSN.
‘Oi Ray, them lot want us to meet them in the park.’
‘Who the hell’s them lot?’ She asked turning to look at me.
‘Ramal and them, he’s with Solomon.’
‘Oh are we going?’
‘Yea might as well. I said as I pulled out my grey addidas jumper from
my wardrobe and put it on.
‘Alright let me just sign off then.’ She said as she signed out of MSN and
turned off the computer.
We made our way downstairs and left the house.
The park was only 5 minutes away from my house so getting there
wouldn’t be a problem.
‘So what did your dad say when you came home the next day then?’
‘Nothing, he just asked me if I had a good time at your house.’ I
laughed.
‘You told him you slept at my house! You gimmie too much joke Chan.’
‘Yea but he want’s me home by 11pm today.’ I said pushing the park
gate open.
‘Wow, that’s early.’ Rayanne said sarcastically.
We walked into the park; there was no sign of Ramal and his friend’s.
‘Well where are they then?’ Rayanne scanned the park.
‘There probably at the back of the park by the football courts.’
We strolled over to football courts and immediately I spotted Ramal’s
big head and Solomon in his brown Nike top.
They were all circled around something, a mixed raced girl.
‘Who’s that?’ Rayanne asked me clocking the other girl.
‘Don’t know, let’s find go find out.’
We walked over to the boy’s. Solomon was the first to spot us and
walked straight towards us.
‘Wagwarn Chantel!’ He shouted over to us as he got closer.
‘Cool Solomon.’ I said hugging him.
‘And my choonting Rayanne.’ He said.
‘Shutup Solomon.’ She gasped as she received a bear hug from Solomon.
‘Come let me talk to you Rayanne.’ Solomon said as he pulled Rayanne
away.
‘Nah I’m with Chantel.’ She said looking at me.
‘Go with him Ray Ray.’
‘Yea come with me Ray Ray.’ Solomon repeated after me as he dragged
Rayanne off into another part of the park.
As I walked over to Ramal and the others I caught a glimpse of the
mixed race girl’s face; it was Samantha!
‘What you doing here Samantha?’ I asked confused.
‘Your cousin called me and told me to come init, he said you asked him
to call me and tell me to come.’ Samantha replied.
‘I did?… Oh yea I did.’ I said as Ramal gave me a look saying -go along
with the story-.
‘Cool Chantel!’ Ramal shouted out to me.
‘Yea…are you lot just gonna jam here all day?’ I asked as I sat myself
down on the bench.
‘Yea, nothing else to do.’ Ramal replied.
‘You losers.’ I said examining Samantha’s clothing. She was wearing
white shorts with a small black and white jacket which revealed her
belly and her chest along with black dolly shoes; a pair of Dior
sunglasses sat on top of her curly hair.
Ramal and Jerome who was also mixed race couldn’t seem too able to
take their eyes off Samantha. Ramal was already feeling up her legs and
every now and again Jerome would grab hold of her bum, even though
it wasn’t particularly big.
I turned my head away from them and focused on Jordan who was
walking over in my direction.
‘Wagwarn sexy?’ He said as he sat down next to me.
‘Nothing just bored.’ I said shrugging my shoulders.
‘Talk to me then.’
‘I am.’
‘Wow, I bet you’re not this stoosh with Dion.’ He mumbled under his
breath.
‘You idiot!’ I said punching him on the arm playfully.
‘I’m joking man! I’m joking. Jheezz you’re so violent.’ He said rubbing
his arm.
‘Well don’t chat shit and I won’t have to be violent.’
‘Alright. So are you Dion’s new wifey now?’ His eyes scanned my body
as he said this.
‘No I thought you were.’ I joked.
‘Yea I was unah but then he ducked me for you init.’ He played along
with my joke. I just looked at him and laughed, I couldn’t be bothered
to reply to him.
‘I don’t blame him for choosing you though, you’re a boomting still.’ He
added.
‘Thank you.’ I smiled.
I looked over at Samantha to see what she was doing, I couldn’t find
her. Ramal and Jerome had gone as well, only Derrick and 2 other boys
remained in the football courts, and me and Jordan of course.
‘Where’s Ramal gone?’ I said sitting up straight.
‘Don’t worry about him; he probably went with that hoe and Jerome
into the bush.’
‘What? Samantha’s not a hoe.’
‘Yea true she’s not a hoe cause hoe’s get paid init…she’s a sket bruv.’
‘No she’s not! Why do you say that?’ I asked, unaware of Derrick who
was now walking over to join our conversation.
‘She’s a brainer; before you and Rayanne came to the park she gave
Ramal, Jerome and Derrick head.’
‘Oh yeaaaaa, you talking ‘bout that dirtz, she’s loose blud! How can I
ask her for head and she goes –don’t mess up my hair-. Blud, I stuck
my ‘ting in her mouth and told her to get sucking.’
I couldn’t believe what I was hearing; a girl that I called my friend and
had let into my house many times was now giving head to all the local
boys! What did that make me look like?
‘Oi Chantel, look at this.’ Derrick said as he handed me his phone.
‘What is it?’ I said taking the phone into my hands.
‘Just watch it.’
It was a video. I pressed PLAY, and what I saw shocked me.
Samantha was kneeling on her knees in the park bushes, around her
stood 1 light skinned boy, 1 mixed raced boy and 1 dark skinned boy;
Ramal, Jerome and Derrick.
Jerome was the first to remove his dick from his jeans and place it in
front of Jessica.
‘It’s too big to fit in my mouth.’ She giggled.
‘Just open your mouth and shove it in.’
Jessica opened up and gently ran her mouth along Jerome’s dick, with
the roof of her mouth stroking the tip of its head, as she did this Jerome
gritted his teeth in response. Jessica’s frantic panting was proof that she
was getting turned on from sucking on his dick, she was savouring it
like an exotic dish. Jerome took hold of Samantha’s hair and used it to
guide her head. He slowly pulled her head back and forth gradually
getting faster. His penis muffled her moans as Jerome fucked her; in the
mouth.
I pressed STOP. I couldn’t watch anymore; the thought of giving head
made me sick, watching my friend give head was another story.
‘Why did you stop it there?! There’s more you know.’ Derrick moaned
grabbing the phone out of my hand.
‘I don’t want to see anymore man, it’s nasty.’ I told him.
‘You haven’t seen what Ramal done to her boi.’ Derrick laughed.
‘What did he do?’ Jordan asked cautiously.
‘He made her swallow his cum bruv! And she did it.’
‘Oh my god.’ I said covering my mouth.
‘She’s dirty man; I’d never make her my wife.’ Jordan commented.
‘She gives good head though, not gonna lie.’ Derrick added.
‘I’ll chop of your tongue if I ever find out you give head Chantel.’
Jordan said looking at me.
‘Dickhead. You know I would never put dick in my mouth.’
‘Yea I know but most of the chicks you hang with are loose, you might
start acting like them unah.’
‘Later. I don’t hang with loose chicks.’ I said defending myself and my
friends.
‘You do Chantel. Look at Samantha and Jessica.’
‘Jessica’s a killer hoe bruv!’ Derrick added
‘Anyway forget them man.’ Jordan said trying to end the conversation
about hoes.
‘Oh yeaaa… I heard that your Dion’s new ‘ting Chantel.’ Derrick said
moving closer to me.
‘Listen up ya ediaat I’m no one’s ‘ting yea.’ I told him.
‘OK miss facety, I was just asking.’
‘I don’t even know what you’re doing with Dion; you should be my wife
Chantel.’ Jordan said putting his arm around me.
‘You wasteman! You’re moving to your bredrin’s link.’ Derrick laughed.
‘Ay shut up Derrick. You should be careful with Dion you know
Chantel.’
‘Why? What do you mean?’ I asked looking at Jordan.
‘I mean like, he’s my boy and everything but when it comes to girls he
only want’s them for one thing.’ His voice turned serious. Derrick
laughed as he walked away to join the other boys.
‘What, you tryna say he’s using me then?’ I said in a rude tone.
‘Nah I’m not saying he is I’m just letting you know init so you can be
careful init.’
Jordan stared at me as I sat in silence thinking of what he had just told
me, then I felt his lips press against mine.
‘What are you doing Jordan?!’ I yelled pushing him off me and
jumping to my feet.
‘What so I can’t kiss you?’ He asked confused.
‘No! I don’t even know you!’
‘What you talking about?! We went to the same primary school bruv!’
‘I left that primary school in year 4 Jordan and I’m in secondary school
now, I haven’t seen you for time.’
‘But you still know me.’
‘Let’s just leave this Jordan, forget it happened.’ I sat myself back down
on the bench.
‘Dion fucked you init.’ Jordan said moving closer to me.
‘What?!’ I was so confused.
‘You slept at his drum in his room, don’t think I couldn’t hear things.’
‘So! That doesn’t mean we had sex.’ I said standing up again. He was
really starting to get on my nerves.
‘So what did you do then?’ He said standing up as well.
‘Nothing man! What’s wrong with you?’
‘You might as well tell me because me and him are tight and if I ask him
he’ll tell me straight away.’
‘Ask him then.’ I said; for some weird reason I had put all my trust into
Dion.
‘You might as well just say now then.’ He pushed.
‘You know what yea I’m going. Fuck this.’ I cursed and walked off out
of the park. I went home.
I was so angry, if I’d known this was going to happen then I would not
have come out at all today. I was close to my house now and I couldn’t
wait to get home. My phone started vibrating.
‘Where the hell are you?’ Rayanne shouted down the phone.
‘I’m near my house.’
‘Oh so you just got up and left me here yea. Oh thanks’!’
‘No I didn’t. Jordan was getting on my nerves and I didn’t know where
you were.’
‘Yea whatever.’
‘Nah seriously. Why you getting vex though, Samantha’s there.’
‘Is she?’
‘Yea she’s with…’
‘Oh I can see her now.’ She said cutting me off.
‘Call me later please.’
‘Why? You gonna be to busy with Dion?’ I could tell she was annoyed
with me by the tone of her voice.
‘Ahh shut up.’ I said and locked off the phone. Why was everyone
talking about Dion!

I pushed open my front door and stormed up the stairs.

‘Where are you off to in a hurry?’ My dad called out after me.
‘My bedroom.’
‘Why you back so early? It’s only 7pm.’
‘I…have homework.’ I said and then I slammed my bedroom door shut.
I wasn’t in the mood to socialize with anyone and I was so tired.
I closed my eyes.
I was dreaming about Dion; me and him were in my room on my bed.
He was lying between my legs with his lips against mine, I loved his sexy
lips. He removed my bra and got to work on my breast; sucking on my
nipples and biting then softly as they hardened. Then the weirdest thing
happened, Dion put my right breast in mouth and started to vibrate! I’d
never experienced anything like it before; he was vibrating on my
breast! Tingling waves of sensation rushed to my head…..
‘Oh shit!’ I yelled as I jumped up from my dream, I must have fallen
asleep with my phone on my chest. My phone started vibrating again, it
was him; Dion.
‘Yea hello?’ I said still recovering from my sleep.
‘What’s wrong with you?!’ He asked, his voice sounded angry.
‘Huh…w-what do you mean?’ I asked confused, I had no idea what he
was talking about.
‘Don’t act dumb with me! Jordan told me how you tried lips him today
in the park.’
‘WHAT?!’ It all made sense now, that dumb bastard Jordan was
chatting shit.
‘You know, I actually liked you Chantel, I wanted to make you my wife.
But I hate dumb bitches like you who try come between me and boys.’
The words DUMB BITCHES LIKE YOU slapped me in the face.
It was happening to all to fast.
‘Dion I never kissed Jordan, I wouldn’t do that to you. If anything
Jordan’s the one trying to come between you and me.’
‘Naaaah, There’s no you and me now init. Don’t call my phone again
yea. You little sket.’
And he hung up.
I stared at my phone’s screen in silence for a few minutes; I couldn’t
believe what had just happened. I wasn’t sure whether I was in shock at
the fact that Jordan had lied or the fact that a boy I really liked had just
called me a sket and told me to never call him again. As much as I
wanted to call him back and explain everything, I didn’t.
The holiday’s were coming to an end and I was feeling more depressed
than ever.

Chapter 5
Believe it or not things had become worse with the Dion situation,
rumours had now got round to my cousin Ramal that I had fucked
Dion! I’d been told that Ramal was going mad, I’d been hiding from
him since the Easter holidays when we were in the park and now it was
coming close to the summer holidays.

I was on my way home from school with my girls Ferlisha, Dion’s

younger and Kirsty, Ramal’s sister.
‘So what actually happened with you and Dion then?’ Ferlisha asked
me as we got off the bus and walked into the bus station which was
crowded with school and college kids; it was like this every day after
school.
‘He fingered me, that’s all that happened; he knows I’m a virgin.’
‘So why’s he telling everyone he fucked you then?’
‘Because he’s angry with me so he want’s me to look like a hoe.’
‘Well…he’s over there so let me go ask him.’ Ferlisha said walking off to
greet her older.
‘What? Oi Ferlisha come back!’ I yelled after her. She ignored me and
continued to walk over to Dion.
‘Shit! Whys she gonna go that? Now it’s gonna look like I sent her over
to him.’ I told Kirsty.
‘Oh well, he needs to know to stop chatting shit about you.’
I just wanted to get away from Dion, fast. Me and Kirsty walked over to
our bus stop and waited for the bus, as we did so a familiar face caught
my eye; it was Jordan! As he walked past me he gave me one of the
dirtiest looks I have ever received.
‘Who the hell do you think your looking at like that dickhead?!’ I yelled.
‘Don’t start with me Chantel.’ He said as he stopped and turned to look
at me.
‘What, so you can chat shit about me and I’m expected to just sit back
and take it yea?’
‘Ahh whatever man, I’m not in the mood for this.’ He tunred his back
and began to walk off.
‘You see that’s why your last girl played you Jordan, because you’re a
dickhead!’ I yelled. Everyone went silent.
‘WELL SKET’S LIKE YOU ALWAYS GET PLAYED BRUV!’ He said
at the top of his voice. I froze. Everyone looked at me as Jordan walked
off with his bredrin. I turned around and looked at Dion searching for
even the slightest sign of sympathy; he remained silent and looked away.
Adults looked at me in disgust and girls whispered in their little groups
about me.
My bus soon came and with all eyes still on me I stepped onto the bus
with Kirsty, Ferlisha soon came running and joined us on the bus.
‘You alright babe?’ Ferlisha asked placing her hand on my shoulder and
taking a seat.
‘Yea.’
‘Don’t worry about Jordan, he’s a dickhead…’ She said, this was her
attempt to cheer me up.
‘Well EVERYONE think’s I’m a sket now.’
‘Well don’t worry about what everyone think’s, you know your not a
sket.’ Kirsty told me.
I really loved this girl, she was like a little sister to me and she always
managed to make me happy, but today she failed to cheer me up.
‘It’s easy for you to say that, you’re not in my situation. So what did
Dion say Lisha?’ I asked knowing that it was going to be more bad
news.
‘The truth?’
‘Yea obviously, or I wouldn’t be asking.’
‘Well he said that it’s not him saying he fucked you, it’s Jordan. He also
said that your tryna come between him and his boys…and you’re a
hoe.’
‘Ok then.’ I said looking out the window.
‘Don’t worry man, they don’t know what the meaning of a hoe is, they
call every girl they don’t like a hoe.’ Kirsty added.

I went home that night and went straight to sleep; everyone was turning
against me.
The next few days were hard for me; I couldn’t walk to the corner shop
with out chicks giving me dirty looks and boys trying to ask me for my
number just because they heard I was easy. A group of younger boys
that knew Dion often caught my bus after school and would shout things
such as…
‘Oh there’s Dion’s SKET, I swear she’s Ramal’s cousin…he’s pissed. If
my cousin was a hoe I would smack her up differently!’
By now I had got used to hearing the same old rubbish; I just couldn’t
wait for it to all die down, if it ever did.

I was walking home from school, it was the last day and unlike my other
half days where I roamed around the ends with the other girls, today I
went straight home.
I shut the front door behind me as I entered my house; I could have
sworn I heard footsteps coming from upstairs and my dad said he would
be home late today.
‘Daddy?’ I called into the house; there was no answer.
I took off my shoes and slowly tip toed up the stairs and walked towards
my bedroom door. I opened it.
Someone was in my room; Ramal stood up from my bed.
‘W-what are you doing in my room?’ I asked in shock.
‘I’ll answer that when you tell me what Dion’s dick was doing in your
pussy!’ He yelled at me, at the same time he picked up a pillow from my
bed and threw it at my head.
‘People are chatting shit; I never had sex with him!’
‘Do you fucking know what people are saying about you Chantel? They
think you’re a hoe bruv!’
‘Ramal I promise I never fucked Dion.’
‘I know you didn’t, he fucked you!’ He yelled back at me kicking my
bed at the same time.
‘Why don’t you believe me?’ I asked. A tear streamed down the side of
my face, I was hurt at the fact that my own cousin did not believe a
thing I was saying and I was scared of what he might do next.
‘Because I don’t!’
‘But I-I…’
‘Nah shut the fuck up!! You fucked my boy Chantel! What the fuck is
wrong with you?!’ He yelled again, he had lost it; all the anger had gone
to his head now. He paced across the room towards me and grabbed me
by the arms.
‘Get off me Ramal!’ I screamed. I was so scared and I had no idea what
he was going to do to me.
‘I CAN’T HAVE MY LITTLE COUSIN BEING A SKET!!’ He shook
me so hard as he said this and threw me across the room causing me to
hit my head hard on the concrete wall. I sat there in shock; I didn’t
move an inch, I just remained where I was and held back the tears. I
could feel the blood trickling down my forehead.
Ramal threw a box of tissues over to me.
‘You got it easy Chantel, the next time I hear your gwarning like a sket
I’m gonna come and deal with you properly yea.’ He threatened me and
walked out the door. I heard his footsteps as he ran down the stairs and
I waited till I heard the door shut.
He shut the door.
I grabbed some tissues and wiped my forehead. I climbed onto my bed
and curled up into a tight ball and cried myself to sleep; my cousin had
chosen his friends over me.

-A FEW DAYS LATER…

The summer holidays had arrived, finally. I was so excited, no more
school and I was turning 16 soon. I hadn’t seen Ramal since the incident
in my bedroom had occurred, in fact, I hadn’t seen anyone.
I was hungry and there was no food in the house.
‘What am I supposed to eat daddy?’ I whined.
‘I need to go shopping later, take this and go get yourself something to
eat.’ He said handing me £5.
‘Isn’t there any cereal or something in the cupboards?’ I asked looking
for an excuse to not leave the house.
‘Nope, I’ll get some later though.’
I walked into the corridor and put on my shoes, I was leaving my house
for the first time in 4 days.
As I walked up to the chicken shop I spotted a small crowd of boys,
there was about 5 of them and the oldest looked 14.
As I got closer to them they started whistling and trying to get my
attention, I ignored them and continued walking.
The fattest one out of them ran up to me and grabbed my bum; I spun
round and pushed his little round head as hard as I could.
‘Get your dutty hands off me you tramp.’ I said and continued walking.
‘Ay what’s your name B?’ A slightly skinner one ran up to me and
asked. I pretended I did not hear.
‘Ay listen to me when I’m talking to you bitch!’ he said reaching his
hand out to hit me, instead of feeling his fist in my face, I felt someone
step in front of me and push me out the way.
‘What the fuck you doing younger?!’ Jordan’s voice silenced everyone.
‘S-s-she tried violate us Jordan! She boxed Reece in his head!’ He
replied.
‘So! You don’t hit girl’s bruv! You know that’s Ramal’s cousin?’ Jordan
informed the youths.
‘Oh shit, I didn’t know that…don’t tell him.’ The little skinny boy
begged.
‘If you Say…’
I walked off; I was confused to why Jordan was helping me after what
he had done to me a week ago in the bus station.
‘AY! WHERE YOU GOING?’ Jordan yelled from behind me, I
quickened my pace and when I turned the corner I slowed down.
Someone grabbed my arm from behind.
‘Get off me!’ I said as I turned to face Jordan.
‘What so I don’t get a thank you nah?’
‘Thanks now let me go.’ I said pulling my arm out of his grip and
walking off. He followed me.
‘What’s wrong with you?’ He asked trying to keep up with my pace.
‘What do you mean what’s wrong with me? Don’t you remember calling
me a sket Jordan? Oh and what about what you told Dion?’
‘You’re still angry about that and I told Dion that you tried lips me
cause you told him that I tried say how he used you?’
‘I never said that though, I just said I heard he use’s chicks, anyway
whatever.’
‘I didn’t mean to call you a sket; everyone knows when I get angry I
chat shit.’
‘Well I don’t wanna hear it. Leave me alone.’
‘I’m sorry Ok!’ He yelled as he stopped walking.
I stopped.
‘Chantel you know you’re not a sket so I don’t even know why your
letting it bother you.’
‘Because now even my own cousin believes the rumours about me and
Dion. That’s why.’
‘Well did he fuck you?’ He asked moving closer to me.
‘NO!’
‘So then don’t worry about what everyone’s saying. They’ll find
something new to talk about in a few days.’
‘But…’ my voice was cut off as Jordan wrapped his arms around me
and held me tight.
‘Sorry Chantel.’
‘…It’s Ok.’
‘We’re cool yea?’
‘Yea.’ I smiled.
For the first time in a long while I actually had something to smile
about. I had a feeling things were starting to get better, now I just had to
get through all the rumours…