Professional Documents
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Breaking Free
Breaking Free
Breaking Free
By Jamie Flexman
Introduction
I have created this ebook to hopefully inspire and help you with eventually breaking free from the
shackles of everyday life and to pursue whatever passions and dreams that you wish to follow.
This ebook contains a mixture of my best articles and totally exclusive content that focuses on the
following topics;
Page 3 - Dont like doing something? Stop Now
Page 6 - Reasons why having a job is a bad idea
Page 9 You are NOT your job
Page 11 5 Reasons why time is more important than money
Page 13 - 7 Reasons Why You Dont Want to Quit Your Job (and how to ignore them)
Page 15 - Finding your passion
Page 18 - Do you have the courage ?
Page 20 - 6 steps to help you on your way
Personal experience
Page 23 Retail is evil Why I gave up my job
Page 27 6 Things Ive learned from 6 months without a job
Bonus content
Page 30 - How to hand in your notice (Exclusive content)
Page 32 - How to call in sick (Exclusive content)
vampire. We are often unfulfilled and this creates negative emotions that linger with us pretty much
every day of our lives. This of course means we pass it on to our family, friends, loved ones. They can
see we are unhappy and over time, this can create problems with our relationships.
Stop doing these crazy things that are bringing you down. You know what you have to do.
I know what you are going to say, that you cant just quit your job. I mean who does that? Its
immature and reckless right? Maybe you will come up with a ton of excuses such as how to pay the
rent or bills. Or you might worry about what your friends and family will think of you. Its okay, I dont
necessarily mean that you must quit today, but put the wheels into motion today. Think about what
you really want to do with your life and take those first steps right now.
In early 2012 I quit my job. For as long as I can remember I have been a slave to the hourly wage.
Giving up my time for 6 an hour. Dealing with sociopathic managers and disillusioned people on a
daily basis can really bring you down.
For several months I considered handing my notice at my last employer, but those negative thoughts
held me back. Worried that I didnt have anything else lined up. Worried that it would take me
another 9 months to find a new job (my last unemployed period). Weeks of frustration finally came to
a head when over the period of a few days I was treated like a child by a couple of managers. The next
day I handed in a weeks notice and I can honestly say that I had no fear or apprehension about the
future. I felt so relieved and free.
My plan, my calling, is to travel. To live in different parts of the world and experience new cultures
and exciting adventures. Obviously I hope to make enough money through some online ventures,
including this blog, but I honestly dont worry about that. I just want to make enough to enable me to
live life on my own terms. That is my dream.
Shortly I will be doing something that I have always dreamed of doing but was too afraid to try. I will
be travelling to a foreign country by myself. To see what it is like not knowing a single person and to
see how I adapt to this. I chose Germany because I wish to put the last two years of German language
learning into some form of practice. That and they have good beer.
This is just the first stop. I eventually want to actually live, not holiday, but to live at least a few
months in every major continent in the world. I say major. I dont really fancy Antarctica for some
reason. Could be the Penguins, I dont know.
If you are already considering breaking away from the daily grind, then read on..
Have a plan of action. The first step is to actually have an idea about what you want to do.
Go with your gut instinct here and just follow the one big dream you have always had but
were too scared to try. Think about how you can get started, no matter how small that first
step might seem.
Find people who have done it. This can mean speaking to any friends or family members
that have started their own business or maybe look online and send an email to any role
models you may have within your chosen field. Dont be afraid to ask questions, and if
possible, spend some time with these people. Just communicating and being around people
who are where you want to be is inspiring.
Surround yourself with positive people. This is a very important part of any big lifestyle
change. There will always be people willing to put you down for daring to change. If you can,
keep your distance from these people and instead focus on spending time with people who
actively encourage you and want to see you succeed.
Work hard. You may be quitting your job but that doesn't mean you can start slacking. This
is where the real hard work begins. Hopefully you are sufficiently motivated to really tackle
this head on and put all of your energy into making your new life succeed. The only one who
can do it is you.
Never give up. There will be times when pitches you make will be knocked back. When
funds can start getting a little low. When you will wonder is it all worth it?. Just know that
all successful people experience anxiety from time to time and it is perfectly natural. Focus on
your goals and everything will come together in time.
Start thinking about what your calling is. Think about it all day every day. Lets say you want to start
your own business. Go ahead and dream about it. Focus on what you want to sell or provide. Visualise
your customers, your surroundings, the money you will be making. Before we can put a plan of action
in place, we must first have the intention. Dont just wish for your dream, but truly believe that you are
already doing it. Look at these two sentences.
One day I want to be a successful vocal coach
I am already a successful vocal coach, I just dont have the students yet
There is a quote from the actor Will Smith. He said that when he has an idea or a plan, its over. Its
already happened, we just havent seen it yet.
This is a powerful mindset that all successful people have. To truly succeed you must already be the
person you wish to become. I know that sounds paradoxical but when you think about it, it does make
sense. To use an example, Successful dieters often have the mindset that instead of wanting to be a
thin person, they are already a thin person, just trapped inside a fat body. It creates the mindset that
our current reality is just temporary.
We have to believe that this isnt our lot. That we can do anything we set our minds to. Go anywhere
we want to go. Be anyone we want to be.
There is no us and them. There is nothing to differentiate those who are successful from the rest of us
apart from one thing. At some point they decided that they were going to take control of their lives and
start living on their own terms. It has to be that way.
What is the alternative? The 9-5 grind for another 40 years? No thanks.
What we want as human beings is to be challenged in such a way that we feel we can actually make a
difference based on our own decisions. This is why being self-employed or people that are musicians,
actors, writers, athletes or artists generally have a more content life. They are being challenged and
they respond with their minds and instincts.
Dont be trapped in your stifling environment. Get out there and do things on your terms.
Well, you could moan to your boss and move departments but that just makes you beg again, and
weve already established that this sucks.
If you worked for yourself, you can control who you deal with. You can pick and choose business
partners, employees, clients that fit in with what you stand for. No more having to grin and bear it for
the sake of appearing sociable and normal, as last time I checked you couldnt shove a sock in the
mouth of your colleague without your boss getting moody. Shame really.
A brief reflection
Its easy to believe that there is a stigma associated with minimum wage employment, especially when
we hold these positions later in life. It wasnt so bad when I was younger and everyone was fresh out of
college and about to embark on the big bad world. The problem arose when the years
started to pass and I was still slaving away for the soulless corporations that would eventually kill any
desire I had for regular proper employment.
There are only so many shelves that one can fill and only so many orders that one can receive before
insanity sets it. Minimum wage jobs are often thankless jobs too. Every day is Groundhog Day and
everything that you did the day before has been reset as if it never existed.
When you live this existence and you allow this world to become part of who you are, of course it is
easy to become beaten down with life. I remember starting one such job back in my early twenties and
I actually enjoyed telling people that I now had a full time job and decent regular income, well for a 21
year old anyway. This never became a problem until I changed jobs at the age of 25, but instead of
moving up in the world, I merely moved sideways into a similar company.
Actually apart from a brief 6 months stint working on Bournemouth beach, I stayed in retail until the
age of 31 and a time where most of my peers were doing something that society would seem befitting
of someone my age.
To be honest I grew sick of telling people what I did for a living. I hated their fake approval, oh well
thats cool, and the body language that betrayed their sincerity. It wasnt so much their approval that
I was trying to seek, but every time I would tell someone where I worked, it was a timely reminder of
how I wasnt doing what I truly wanted.
I always believed that what we do for a career doesnt define who we are inside. Yet social stigma will
always exist to a certain degree. Now I know that a little paranoia was responsible here and that most
people probably didnt really give a damn, but I have no doubt that social status exists and we judge
people based on this, even if its subconsciously.
This is where we imagine other peoples opinions and base our own on what we believe they think
about us.
I dont need to tell you that this is unhealthy.
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2. When you look back on your life, you never wish for a bigger bank
balance
Think of your life like a book that is being written and will be published when your time is up. Im
fairly sure that you cant fill up a book with your bank balance so what else is there?
Each chapter of this book should be focused on a different aspect of your life and to enable this to
happen, your life should be as varied and eventful as possible. Spending countless hours every week
for years on end working yourself into the ground will not make a very good book, not unless you are
making a difference with your job and/or money.
When people look back on their lives they never wish they could have spent more time in the office so
take note of this now and do something about it.
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losing their hard earned cash. The truth is, no amount of money will ever be enough for them and they
see their increasing bank balance as a barometer of their success.
It would be unfair to call these people tight as a refusal to spend money can also be attributed to a
lack of hobbies or social life. Its certainly easier to spend 70 hours a week in the office if you feel like
you have nothing fun to do outside of work.
The solution to this is quite obvious. The more we have going on in our private lives, the less time we
will allow work to take from us.
4. Those who have time want money, and those who have money want
time
You know the funny thing is that most people want what they cant have and this is usually true across
both ends of the time/money spectrum. Those who are unemployed or have low incomes will strive for
more hours or a better paid job while those who are on six figure salaries often moan that they have no
time to spend with their friends and family.
Neither of these is desirable and both will ultimately cause unhappiness in your life so the trick is to
find a happy medium which leads me to my next point.
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Now this is even worse than the respect thing. If your self-esteem and your self-worth is attached to
what you do for a living then you have some issues my friend. Ill wait here while you go and slap
yourself in the face.
Done? Awesome.
It doesnt matter if you clean out toilets for a living or if youre a world renowned heart surgeon. We
are all human, with the same hopes and fears as each other. Behind that title we are all the same deep
down and we should all try to find peace with ourselves, not the person we present to the world.
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Do you play a musical instrument? If so maybe look into teaching and passing on your
knowledge to others. This is really easy to get started with and its what I currently do.
How creative are you? If you are an avid drawer/painter or if you enjoy making things
then this is a great way to start a new business for yourself.
Are you good at helping people? Maybe look into going to university and work towards
becoming a psychologist or therapist. A simpler option is to start a blog and offer advice and
tips based on your own life experiences.
Do you have any standout physical attributes? If you are still relatively young and you
have a natural talent then maybe sports is an area that you could do well in. Especially if you
have natural speed, strength, endurance etc. Maybe you are good looking and have great
genes. If so the modelling industry could be an option.
The point here is to find something you are good at that you can develop and monitise. In this day and
age careers can be made out of almost anything and the best part is, if the niche is a little obscure the
chances are there is little competition.
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3. What have you always wanted to do but never had the chance to?
This is a great way to find your passion. So far we have looked at the past and at the present for
inspiration but now have a little look towards the future. Both the past and the present are based on
decisions made a while ago which may or may not be in line with the person you currently are.
So what have you always wanted to do? Some people really want to go travelling and that alone can
open up a crazy new world full of opportunities. Not only is it a passion unto itself but you can make
money along the way by teaching English as a foreign language or again, starting a blog and sharing
your experiences with the world. These routes are very popular are pretty easy to get started with.
Just because you havent yet done something doesnt mean that you cant make it happen. You would
be surprised by how easy it can be to pick up a new skill or to transfer your experiences over to a new
niche.
Work in a circus
Take up an obscure sport like Handball
Become a skydiving instructor
Singer? Play an instrument? Earn a living playing at weddings
Be a bartender on a cruise ship
Try your hand at stand-up comedy
How about becoming a life coach? Dating coach?
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Do what you can to find your passion and to give up that boring unfulfilling life that may be dragging
you down. Keep working on it, think, create, plan, discover, find, inspire and motivate.
Sometimes these flashes of inspiration can come immediately and other times they can take months
or years. Dont get disheartened or give up.
There will come a time, sooner than you probably think, when you will be able to live the life you want,
whatever your goals may be.
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Why do we do this?
Simply the brain doesnt like change. It likes being in a comfort zone because it requires less effort
than pushing the boundaries. If enough time has passed, and the brain is too set in its ways then it can
be a monumental effort to break free. How many times have you wanted to search for a new job and
you kept putting it on the backburner because you were too tired or you had something better to do? I
think weve all been there.
It is one part laziness and one part fear I think. They both work together in tandem to keep those
shackles locked tightly. Laziness stems from a fear of doing something new and fear grows from the
laziness of not doing anything different. Like a downward cycle of depression and monotony which
just grows stronger with time
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me from even trying. I let fear win and every time this happened it became stronger. It feeds off your
negative emotions and the next time youre faced with a similar situation, its hold on you gets tighter
and tighter.
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1. Do the research
Great you now have your career or goal in mind, so what next? Well now comes the part where you
have to really do the research. If it is a new career then try and find out everything that you will need
to start it up. Does it cost money? Do you need any qualifications? Is it something you can start right
now or do you need to learn how to do it?
If it is something like travelling, then equally you need to seriously look into it. How much will it cost?
What route are you planning to take? Are you going alone or with someone? Where will you stay?
When starting something new, preparation really is key here. You need to know what you are letting
yourself in for. Be prepared for anything and everything. Can you cope with the challenges that may
arise, financially or otherwise? If you find it a struggle can you ride it out?
Another part of researching is to follow where others have been before. Seek out others who are where
you want to be and learn from them. Everything that has ever been accomplished has been
documented in a book or online. Read as much as you can and take in all the information you can
handle. Now that you have done the preparation..
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Okay you have sorted out everything in your own head and you are now mentally prepared for doing
this. Now is the time to come clean with your plans. Usually your actions will have some form of
impact on those around you. If you have kids or a partner then giving up your job is obviously going to
be something they need to know about in advance, as it can be scary for them too. Some people end up
moving back into their parents home as a way to save money while they start their new journey. You
need to ensure that those around you are ready to support you, both mentally and financially should
you need it.
Telling people is also a great motivator to get things started. Nobody wants to look silly after telling
everyone their plans. Muhammad Ali used to tell the press which round he would knock out his
opponent in. To many this was seen as brash and arrogant, and showing a lack of respect for his
opponents. In actual fact, he used it as a tool to help motivate him to follow through with his
predictions. He simply wouldnt allow himself to fail after such bravado.
6. Trust yourself
This is the part where you have to keep the faith. There will be times when things get tough and you
start to question your ability to succeed. In almost all cases there will be a so called pain period. This
is when the novelty of pursuing your passion has passed but you have yet to really start making
money. There will be times when you wonder if it is worth it, whether you should just give up and go
back to the real world.
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Stay strong and trust yourself. Trust the process. There will always be a dip and everyone will go
through it so try not to worry. You will come out the other side stronger and more determined than
ever to make it work. Keep putting the hours in and the results will inevitably come.
That day when you make your first sale or receive your first payment will be one of the best feelings
you will ever experience. Keep focused on that goal and remain strong.
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over soon. These insane shift patterns will be replaced with normality and this nightmare will surely
end.
I was half right.
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(Assistant) and I could do this easily. You have no excuses. She said.
I glanced again at my colleague who I could tell was doing his utmost to remain calm and silent.
You will stay out here and you will not go inside the store for any reason. You will tell (assistant)
when you go for a break, and you will tell him when you return
Thanks for reminding me, I thought to myself. Its been a while since I felt like a child.
Later that day in what I can only assume was an attempt to strip us of our dignity, she had her
assistant come upstairs and take away our phones (which were essential in our role) and to inform me
that I would spend the next week in the staff kitchen pot washing.
Oh its like that is it? I asked.
He smirked. I punched the box next to me in a fit of rage.
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You see pretty much every month since then, the amount in my bank account has remained pretty
constant. Every time it has taken a hit, within a week or two I receive a little windfall from somewhere.
I would take on a bunch of students or sell a few articles and everything gets back to normal. I dont
expect sorcery to be involved here, but that would be cool wouldnt it?
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in the article you are not your job, but it sure feels better when youre not a slave to the minimum
wage.
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http://jobsearch.about.com/od/resignationletters/a/resignationlet.htm
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The second option is generally used when you have respect for your manager and the two of you have
a good working relationship. In situations like this, they may even ask you to stay and you never know.
You could get a new improved contract out of it.
Remember though, whatever you decide to do, never be rude and never burn your bridges.
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Dont put on a voice and never ever cough (unless you have a cough)
The worst thing you can ever do is to put on a voice when phoning in. It is easily read by most people
and everyone will think you are just skiving. Dont do it, use your ordinary voice and everything will
sound a lot more authentic, because it will be.
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The basis for any white lie is to not go into elaborate details. The more details you give, the more
chance you have of slipping up and making everything a whole lot worse. If your manager starts
asking a lot of questions, answer them but keep them short and be a little blunt, without being rude.
Keep to the absolute basics and just state the facts. Example;
You Hi, Im just calling to say that I wont be coming in today, sorry about this. (Polite and to the
point)
Manager Oh okay, whats wrong?
You Its a stomach thing, just a dull ache and its more comfortable when I lie down. (Vague but
explains why you cant come in)
Manager Oh dear do you know why? (Probing for details)
You No nothing comes to mind (Less you know the less you can say)
Manager I see, have you been to the doctors? (Standard question that comes up every time)
You Well if it doesnt clear up I will see if I can get to one, but just resting now. (Shows willingness to
visit doctor, but you make no promises)
Manager Okay, when do you think you will be back to work? (Another textbook question)
You I dont know, I will see how I feel later and I will let you know asap. (How can you know?
Always be vague but offer to keep in touch)
You see how the manager cycles through various questions to try and find out details? Dont play that
game and keep everything short and simple. Sometimes they may try and play doctor, but if this
happens just reiterate that you dont know what the cause is and you will see a doctor if problems
persist. Remember they arent qualified to give a diagnosis so pay no attention to it.
Points to remember
Calling in sick shouldnt be an excuse to hide away from the world. Sick days are designed for people
who for whatever reason dont feel like they can go into work that day. There is no such thing as a
stupid reason, as if you genuinely feel like you cant go to work then that that is good enough.
Remember that if you have any feelings that persist then please find someone to talk to about it.
Preferably someone who is qualified to do so, or failing that a chat with a friend can be a good
substitute in the short term.
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