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The Essentials For An Extraordinary Life: Unconcealing and Shifting An Underlying Commitment
The Essentials For An Extraordinary Life: Unconcealing and Shifting An Underlying Commitment
of your goal, does it make sense that you might have an underlying
commitment thats in conflict with what you say you want? (discuss)
F. Most of us dont even know that we have commitments other than those
were aware of consciously. Thats because for the most part we make these
underlying commitments to ourselves when were quite young. We make
them as a result of some emotionally significant incident or experience or we
make them as a way to deal with our circumstances. As we grow and mature
and our circumstances change, we forget all about them, but unconsciously
keep those first commitments as part of our personal operating systems.
G. Share an example of one of your own underlying commitments if
appropriate.
H. One of the fascinating things about this type of internally focused coaching
were doing is that every time you create a new vision or set a new goal
youll likely unconceal new Underlying Commitments. Its not like you can
let go of one underlying commitment and theyre all gone for good. The
possibility of finding new underlying commitments is something that youll
constantly need to be aware of as you stretch and grow.
I. We must expose our existing commitments before we have the power to
shift them. By exposing our unconscious commitments, we gain the ability
to see and tell ourselves the truth. This allows us to make new conscious
choices based on where we are today instead of from our past. In a moment
were going to go into an internal exercise to unconceal an underlying
commitment. Is there anything you need to ask or say before we do so?
C. Allow yourself to become aware of the choices youve made up to this point
that have taken you further away from achieving this desire rather than
closer to it. What are the choices you have made that are inconsistent with
accomplishing your goal or fulfilling your desire? (pause) Breathe deeply
and allow yourself to recognize the choices and actions that have
disempowered you, that came from a place of fear, that came from your past
programming, that were unconscious, or self-limiting. (pause)
D. Now as you recognize all the choices and behaviors that have prevented you
from accomplishing your goal, allow yourself to take responsibility for
them. Without judgment or without making yourself wrong, just admit to
yourself, yes, I made those choices, or yes, I took or didnt take those
actions. (pause)
E. Imagine that all those choices and actions were actually in perfect alignment
with what you have truly been most committed to. What have you been
most committed to in this area of your life? What is the underlying
commitment that has caused you to make those self-limiting choices and
take those non-serving actions? Simply ask yourself, what would I possibly
be more committed to than achieving my desire? (pause) Take a deep
breath and allow yourself to become aware of the underlying commitment
that has been controlling this area of your life. As you get it, write it down.
(Work with the client here as necessary using focused questions to help them
become clear on what the underlying commitment is.)
F. Take another breath and acknowledge that youve actually made the perfect
choices that have been in alignment with your underlying commitment. You
are indeed a capable person, and youve been attaining exactly the results
that youve been most committed to! Just breathe into that recognition, and
as you do acknowledge that by simply shifting that commitment, you can
and will create something new.
G. Breathe easily again and focus your attention back into the area of your
heart. Now ask yourself, What do I need to know right now in the
present that will allow me to give up this old underlying commitment?
What do you need to know that will allow you to feel safe and ready to give
up that old first commitment? (pause) When you get it, write it down.
H. Take another deep breath and ask yourself what current habits or behaviors
you would have to choose to give up in order to move closer to your goal?
What are the specific behaviors that are tied to this old commitment and do
not serve you in moving toward the fulfillment of your goal and vision?
(pause) As you get them, write them down.
I. Allow yourself to see or hear a structure you can put in place to support you
in giving up those old non-serving choices and behaviors. What kind of
reminder, practice or other structure do you need to put in place to help you
let go of the habits and behaviors of your underlying commitment?
J. Bring your vision and goal to mind once again. (pause) As you do, ask
yourself for a new commitment you can adopt that will support you in
moving toward the fulfillment of your vision and goal. What new personal
commitment can you make to yourself that will support you to make choices
and take actions that will move you surely and consistently in the direction
of your milestones, goal and vision? (pause) As you get it, say it to yourself
a few times, and then write it down.
K. Drop back down inside and breathe deeply again, reconnecting with your
inner wisdom. Now allow yourself to get an action step or a practice that
will support you to fully give up this old underlying commitment and live in
the presence of your new conscious commitment. What specifically do you
need to do to make your new commitment part of your personal operating
system from now on? (pause) As you get it, write it down.
L. Now, with another deep breath, thank yourself for being willing to look
within and access your wisdom in this way. Then, if youre willing and
ready to give up that old commitment, promise yourself that youll take the
action or begin the practice thats needed to integrate and use your new
commitment to your highest benefit.
M. When youre ready, breath easily and gently again and come on back to the
room where you sit and back into our call.