Edwards’s free time

Preface

Hooray, I have some free time,

Alone,

My wife has gone on holiday with my daughter,

And the family have gone on a very long hunting trip,

Well I say the whole family,

Everyone apart from...

EMMETT!!!!
Edwards POV

Chapter 1: Enjoying what I’ve missed

*sigh* All alone and I can finally do what I have been missing most, all the
wonderful wonderful things. Pranks (Bella stopped me doing them unless they
are on Emmett to which she agrees!), Reading books that if Bella saw me
reading she would want an immediate divorce and checking out women that
she hates! This evening I am reading, quietly but then again there will be the
err small laugh or ridiculous noise. Later Emmett wants me to go with him to
the local strip club, oh god if Bella knew I was going there she would leave me
and go back to live in err as far away as possible like err Iceland (or maybe not
as there is a volcano going off over there) but she might have a bit of trouble
getting a flight there as there are no flights at the moment.

Ok so you are wondering why Emmett and I have the whole house to our
selves, well it started like this...

Bella had just been invited round to Angela’s house with Renesmee. Bella
asked if I was going to come with her but I said no as it would be good for Bella
and Angela to have some time to them as they have not seen each other in
ages. When the rest of the family heard Bella was going away so Carlisle
decided that while Bella and Renesmee were gone the rest of us will go on a
long hunting trip. Everyone agreed (Emmett did to until I said...)

“I don’t feel like going Carlisle, I will hold the fought whilst your gone” And that
is when Emmett surprisingly changed his mind.

“Oh well if Edward is staying I will to” humm I wonder why that is? Is it to keep
me company whilst my lovely wife is gone or is it so he can annoy me?
Humm I wonder which one it is? Then the family went Emmett and I
have now got the house to our selves.

Oh the phone is ringing... It’s Bella

“Hello my lovely wife how are you........ Good so you got there safely......” Hang
on where’s that loud music coming from, it sounds like err STARSTRUCK
EMMETT!!!!!!!!!!!

“Sorry honey Emmett is making so much bloody noise, PUT A BLOODEY SOCK
IN IT!!!.... no not you honey, no, no not you, it was Emmett, EMMETT
not you, look your err breaking up err better go ring you in the morning
love bye” I hung up fast so that she didn’t scream at me and then
disconnected the home phone line and turned off all the mobiles in the
house but Emmett’s was with him...

I stormed round to his room and smacked his door... hard. So hard I left a dent
in his door, err shit umm what will Esme say, err note to self don’t hit
doors or slam on doors, and shopping list Carrots, cabbage and a new
door for Emmett’s room.

“EMMETT LET ME IN NOW OR I WILL SMASH YOUR DOOR DOWN” I screamed

and instructed.

“I don’t need to, you have already partly broken it...” then he started singing...

“Coz your hot when your cold your yes then you’re no”

“EMMETT SHUT UP!” and I did smash his door down. Okay shopping list, move
door to top priority.

“Give me your phone or I will not go with you this evening to the strip club”
Emmett stared at me for a moment
“Why should I? Humm” and he did the stupid clicker thing where you do the S
and click whilst doing it (idiot)

“Emmett thanks to you my wife is pissed off with me so hand it over, NOW!!”

“Okay you only had to ask...” That was it he had pushed the final button and
my temperature had final gone off the scale and to boiling point.
Lunged at him and got ready to fight. He lunged back and I hissed
at him.

“Ooh Edward I’m so scared, ha” I gave him the evils and ran forward. My
impact hit him hard and him smash against the wall. The old
mantel piece that was there now had a dent in it to. 2nd thing on
shopping list new mantel piece for Emmett so Esme doesn’t have
a fit when she sees the mess of his room. I heard his neck click
and he fell to the floor, his eyes where shut, I broke his neck...

I panicked for a minute but then chilled as he stood back up and clicked his
neck back into position.

“Ha-ha you should have seen your face when you thought you had broken my
neck don’t forget I cannot die without tearing me apart and
burning the pieces LOOSER!!”