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A MEMOIR ABOUT MY STRUGGLE FOR

INDEPENDENCE AND HOW I CONNECT


TO PEOPLE WITH SPECIAL NEEDS

IM AN ADULT
NOT A CHILD

BY ZACH BLUMSTEIN

CONTENTS OF ADULTS

MEGAN 4

JORDY 12

LINDSEY 25

STANLEY 33

JORDAN 41

This is a story about my perception of my


friends with special needs and the time I
spent with them during my last semester
in college I spent time at an Artist colony
facilitating other peoples art.

INTRO

This is my final step in seeing my


own self mature. As I look forward
to my career, I can see that even the
the people Im facilitating are aboard
the same boat as me. Were looking
forward to the future to trying to find
a job. Thats what makes us equals
While developing there skills we learn
from each other. I am not the most
patient person and they are not the best
at communicating their needs either, but
at the new artist colony there is always a
roller coaster of expectations. But all you
can be is be the best you can be.

as such even though I dont have special


needs. My objective was not to judge them
for their imperfections and psychological
issues but for what makes them human.
Finding the best within myself is also no
easy undertaking. Especially with all the
noise echoing off the open space of the
new facility. This is our chance to add to
the studios blank canvas, the building
blocks of the space.
I sat there working on my half-done chair
thinking to myself; I didnt belong in this
finished chair. There werent enough
chairs, some people couldnt find a chair
to sit in because half of them have finished
their chair. I am the only volunteer sitting
in a chair. However, I was also the only one
close to their age.

I expect for people who are adults to act


mature. And at many times people with
special needs arent mature and are seen
as children and as lab rats. At times during
my volunteering I felt like I was perceived

MEGAN

I appreciate Megans
accomplishments. Her
body of work at the
Soul Centers artist
colony says a lot about
her motivation.

According to Megan, were


getting ready for the move.
As she speaks, her eyes
dance back and forth. Shes
examining our progress. She
is slightly shaking like shes
waking up at the crack of
dawn. She stays still, using
self-talk to hide the fear she
is conveying. But Megans a
hard worker, she wakes up
early to the birds chirping so
she can make art with us.
Transition is tough for
me too. For me change
is scary. Every year from
kindergarten on, I dont
sleep on the first day of
school. I look back on
the year and review my
life story.

I appreciate Megans
accomplishments. Her body
of work at the Soul Centers
artist colony says a lot about
her motivation. A week
ago, I recall looking back
on Megans first blanket.
I remember a blanket full
of exquisite colors; each
color chosen by Megans
keen eyesight; each color
chosen with purpose. The
blanket itself sold for $60.
The blankets colors come
together like magic. Each
thread clasping onto the
other thread like Megans
hands filled with strength.
She and her facilitator
spent a month wearing
her artwork piece by
piece, some threads show

their weakness and other


threads show their strength.
The blanket brings them
together to learn about each
other and ties together their
friendship. This is Megans
craft and, the blanket is
her end product; it is more
valuable than money.
Whenever I work with Megan
I learn about the brighter
side of things. Negativity
lives within me because Im
searching for a job for after
College and rejection letters
scare me. Megan stays in the
moment. She understands
the world on her own terms;

I WENT TO BLAKES
APPLE ORCHARD AND HAD
SOME HARD CIDER WITH
MY AUNT. NEXT TIME IM
BRINGING MY COUSINS.

WHAT? THIS IS
MEGANS CURVE-BALL,
IF ONLY MY EARS
COULD LISTEN BETTER.
In my mind special
needs people are kids
because thats all I
knew growing up and
volunteering at the
Friendship Circle.

Its just a chair, its not


difficult, or life changing.
Here I am watching her
screw a bolt into the chair
and shes almost done with
it and I am lost in a past
project of hers.
Theres just too much
going on and I hate
directions. I just want to
get the chair done.
Megan tells me, Youve
got to have patience. I
j ust try to stay positive;
its all you can do.
I believe in Megan, in the
wake of change its all you
can do; look to the light
to see the brighter side.
A wide audience is going
to see Megans work at
this new art. The work
she puts in is going to be
more valuable. Megans
attention to details and
patience and knowledge
wont be known by the
world. Prepare yourself
to be blown away. Just
because Megans an artist
at the Soul Center and
hangs around people with
autism doesnt mean you
make assumptions about
her. ADHD is a problem for
both Megan and I. College

is the direction I went in


but for Megan she has
her own direction.

my face, my hands stop


building the chairs, and
my look is disbelief.

Our chats always get


interesting because Megan
always finds a way to show
interest in my life. What did
you do this weekend? For a
second I didnt say anything.
Its my senior year, my last
year to get things done and
my weekends dont mean
as much to me as they
might mean to her.

She continues, Zach, Im 21,


Im old enough to drink.

I dont know. But last


weekend I was at a
synagogue downtown,
its been a while since
Ive been there.
The smile on her face
indicates she is going places
and wants to show it off.
I went to Blakes Apple
Orchard and had some
hard cider with my
aunt. Next time Im
bringing my cousins.
What?
This is Megans curveball, if only my ears could
listen better Id recognize
her pitch better. Instead
roses start growing on

So instead, I lie. In my mind


the Friendship Circle is
where teens and kids with
special needs are paired
up to engage in social
activities. Ten years ago I
was one of those teens. My
understanding of Megan is
as a kid. I lie to make myself
appear to have forgotten
her age. Lying also stops
me from looking down on
Megan because Megan is
a friend at heart. I say, I
knew that, I mean I thought
I knew that. The last time I
was at Blakes I was driving
my friend home to Armada
for Shabbat. Allysa lives
in Detroit but shes home
schooled in Armada.
Megan doesnt notice
the lie.
I could never be home
schooled. I like school. I
was social and all, even
though Im really shy.
I want to keep Megan as my
friend.

Youre not shy Megan.


Youre like one of the few
people who I talk to here.
Zach, Im glad I met you.
Youre such a good friend.
I cant wait for you to
teach me to draw. Guess
what, Ive been working
on what you told me
about keeping my hand
loose, it actually works.
Yeah, its just like
paperwork, right?!
I like paperwork, but its
nothing like paperwork. I
mean I do paperwork for
my dad, but its more like
putting together these
chairs. It takes a lot of
direction with lots of process.
So is drawing. Its a bit
of a drawn-out process.
It takes lots of time, but
unlike paperwork its muscle
memory, once you get it
youll have it for life.
Soon Megan will be doing
paperwork for the art
gallery at the Soul Center.
Shell enjoy filing artist
statements, planning the wine
and cheese parties and
making the reservations for

important guest speakers.


With the back of my chair
in place, I sit wide-eyed
looking at Megans two
finished chairs. Thank God,
its lunch time. I need to
apologize, since meeting
Megan we honestly talk
about everything, knowing
her age is important.

Hey, we need to explore


around now that were at
the Soul Center. Come with
me, lets find some apple
cider. You might like some
of the cool places nearby.
Zach, I dont know.
Let me ask Brian.
Brian is the Creative
Director at the Soul
Center. He is in charge
of the people like Megan
and all the artists at the
Soul Center. His duty is to
mentor each of them and
get the best out of them.
What did Brian say?
Brian said we have about
30 minutes and dont come
back drunk.
Though the artists have
freedom to create whatever
they please, they still have a
structure around them. We

10

enter the bar. Its nothing


like the countryside or like
Blakes. Driving by Blakes
at sundown is magical. Its
like seeing the sunrise while
camping up north, theres
nothing around you. Megan
and I sit down at the bar,
I learn Megan grew up in
Warren and I grew in West
Bloomfield. However, we
couldnt be more similar.
Megan, what high school
did you go to?
I went to several
schools, but Cardinal
was the worst. The
kids there are so full
of themselves.
You mean its really
cliquey?
Yeah, I mean I had a
couple of friends like
one girl was my best
friend. Me and her
used to go to movies
and all sorts of things
together.
Cool, do you two still keep
in touch?
Not really, I mean like I text
her but she never answers.

Shivers roll down my spine. I look around


me; so many people are on their phone.
I dont care if they are playing a game or
checking Facebook, but I am reminded of
the people I used to call friends. They were
always on their phone, but they stopped
responding to my messages.

My life felt lighter now, like all the bruises


from the bullies of the past faded as I sat
and drank my beer. I felt I was moving
forward with life just like Megan. Megan
sits very still, her laughter subsiding. I
once was called four eyes too, people just
dont understand. Some of the smartest
people wore glasses. Glasses make me
who I am and it made those famous
people who they are. If Malcolm X didnt
wear glasses who would Malcolm X be?

I wish I kept in touch with my


friends from high school.

The people at Cardinal were bullies; they


called me four eyes.
The mood is a bit lighter, but at the same
time, sitting at the bar with Megan brought
my bullies to life.
Were not aliens, but if you put us together
wed have four eyes in total.
I know, right, four eyes
isnt even original.

11

Megan says, I studied Malcolm X in high school. We need


someone like that for special needs, haters going to hate.
Reflecting on adulthood, I dont know why I went to college except
to get someplace in life, and to be recognized for something
bigger than myself. But no one in college accepts me for me.
Ive even thought about dropping out. But dropping out means
working at a bar and serving adults who make more money than
you, wear gold watches, odd neckties not matching their suit, and
have personalities that get lost in whatever they do for a living. In
college, my roommates couldnt accept my failures; they all left
me. Megan accepts me for my failures. Thats what being an adult
is all about, keeping your head held high, listening to people, and
being honest with yourself. Even though people like me who dont
yet see Megan as an adult, even though she is one.

12

13

JORDY

14

When Megan and I get back


from the bar Jordy and
Cary are there to greet us.
Its been years since Ive
seen Jordy and Cary. My
dad supposedly has a tight
friendship with Cary. I never
knew where their friendship
went.
But, college has pulled
me away from this World
of Friendship. From short
chats with my father my
understanding is as follows:
Cary is a father figure to
Jordy, but you could visualize
how important Jordy is to
Cary; the way Cary holds
Jordys hand as they are
attempting to draw together.
I find a seat between Lindsey
and Jordy. I shake Carys
hand because hes my dads
friend and I ask, Hows Jordy
today?
Jordys great, today was a
great day, right Jordy? Jordy
didnt nod his head, he was
busy with a purple marker.

Did you and Jordy do


anything fun today?
Yeah, we were just at the
DIA. Right, Jordy?
To put into perspective how
well Cary knows Jordy, they
spend about 20 hours a week
going to art galleries, playing
sports and learning about
the world.

downtown too. I go to school at


CCS.
I went to CCS years ago for
music back when they had a
music program, it was world
famous. One day Jordy is
going to be world famous.
Isnt that right? Jordy turns
around and he seems to
understand Cary.

Jordy was sitting before me


with his purple marker dead
We made a new friend
in the center of the page. He
today.
looked as though he didnt
care about what he was
I hear Jordy now gives hugs. drawing. He kind of is a bit
all over the place with his
Yes, he does; today he put a marker.
smile on the poor mans face
at the DIA.
Hey, what else did you and
This wows me. Jordy never
gave me hugs seven years
ago, instead he bit me. The
change in the air is real and
it kept happening.
Thats crazy, you two were
downtown. Later Ill be

15

Jordy do downtown?
Jordy loves Detroit, Zach.
Today me and Jordy spent
a lot of time downtown. Not
only did we go to the DIA,
but we also went to MOCAD.
Im getting Jordy ready
for the new Soul Center.

This place is more than I


expected.
I know, right, its perfect
for Jordy. Its got some
structure but Jordy has
the freedom to make his
dreams reality. What did
Jordy see at MOCAD? Did
he see anything he liked? I
havent explored Detroit in
so long; its nice to have a
fresh perspective from Jordy
and Cary. This is my chance
to explore Detroit through

Jordys eyes.
Cary says, Woman in Key of
E, Jordy absolutely loved this
exhibit. Its just a woman
sitting up on a pedestal in
a huge room. Everything
is gold all around you. The
woman is even playing a
gold guitar and wearing
this beautiful gold dress.
People sometimes come
and walk around her for
15-45 minutes. But, when
Jordy walks in there this is

16

heaven to him. Inside this


gold room Jordy stands so
still, he is entranced by this
woman and with the music
she is playing.
How long did you stay in
this gold room?
Well, Jordy loved it so
much. I think we stayed
at least long enough that
no one else was there. He
starts to run around and
sing the notes shes playing.

17

Then you wont believe what


happened, the performer
starts to cry. Zach she is a
piece of art. She was just an
installment at the MOCAD.
No way, how do things like
this just happen?
Jordy is truly an inspiration,
to me and the performer.
She connected with him so
deeply. He really affected
this lady who was just an
art piece emotionally. Jordy
keeps changing so much
so that I am thrown back in
my chair. Tension grows in
my neck from remembering
the bite Jordy gave me years
ago.But this is an amazing
biting tension.

Theres a lot going on in


Jordys life; what else have I
missed out on?
Hey Zach, youre crazy.
Lindsey screams. Shes the
person whom I am helping
create art. Though at the
moment my focus is totally
diverted. Cary doesnt realize
my job is to help Lindsey,
but I am busy catching up
on where Jordy is in life.
Well, Jordy is at a school
for people like himself with
special needs. They are
teaching him social skills,
control, and how to do
laundry. Theyre basically
preparing him for the real
world, a world where I might

18

not always be by his


side.
Jordy is in the middle
of scratching out what
seems to be a purple
triangle. He is semiclinging to the marker,
moving it around like a
bird circling the earth.
His pen doesnt really
know what direction
it wants to go in, but
it keeps circling till a
purple triangle seems
to appear. Cary is
guiding Jordy carefully,
almost like a baby with
a direction. Jordy is
still struggling to get
something on paper and
I look to Cary for help

and ask, Why does Jordy


act the way he does? I
cant seem to inspire him
to make anything.
Imagine being a baby
or a toddler. I mean you,
Zach.
Please explain.
Its a scary world out
there that Jordy once
had to experience all
by himself. Youre going
to be frustrated. Life is
frustrating for all of us.
Imagine how hard that
is for Jordy. Jordy found
his own way to express
his frustration through
some bad behaviors,

WOMAN IN KEY OF E
19

like biting, biting himself,


scratching, hitting and you
cant blame him, hes just
expressing himself. Ive
been working with Jordy to
overcome some of these
problems.
As we chat, you can see the
pride in Carys face as he
attempts to help Jordy try
to draw and Jordy sits there
with almost a blank look on
his face.
When Jordy was eigh years
old, he was a little guy.
H e was in a stroller and
he was extremely tough to
work with. You could find
him biting on his sleeve,
hitting, or biting someone
or something. Jordy was
once that annoying kid, he
would literally take his hand
and knock everything off the
table like a bowling ball. He
would do it at home, at my
house, and even in a highend restaurant.

By now I could see a


landscape forming before
him. The purple triangle
is the sky, there are semisquares which are the trees
and all the beings of the
world who ever wronged
Jordy are the other colors
Jordy uses. Yet, they are
just squares to Jordy in my
opinion.
Jordy used to lay on his
back, just to look up at the
ceiling; some people call this
his autistic world. He could
stay in this state of mind all
by himself as long as you let
him. There were also times
when Jordy wouldnt let you
touch him. Sometimes hed
be in a happy state of mind
and he would come up to
you and give you a hug.
Yet, there were other days
when I would go for the hug
and he would try to bite me
instead.

Does Jordy know his


direction in life? What goals
does Jordy have?

I ask Cary about this When


I attended the Friendship
Circle as a teen why did
Jordy try to bite me?

Jordy has a job like you


have a job. Jordy inspires
me every day and, he is an
inspiration to all.

At times, sadly, Jordy


doesnt want to be a part of
our world. Hes in his own
world and hes happy to

20

DOES JORDY KNOW HIS

DIRECTION IN LIFE? WHAT GOALS DOES


JORDY HAVE?

be by himself there. Jordy


has trouble being able to
explain what he needs, he
cant tell you if he is hungry
or tired. Jordys changed in
so many ways. Jordy now
loves people, Jordy loves
being social or as social as
he can be. He shows this
by not hitting, biting or
scratching anyone anymore.
In fact he doesnt even clear
the table anymore.
Its very apparent the work
Cary and Jordy have put into

Jordys ability to function in


our world. Ive actually seen
Jordy inspire the people
in the Soul Caf. I also saw
Jordy at The Shul several
times. Jordy inspires me and
many other people there.
I didnt realize how much
growth Ive personally seen
in Jordy.
Cary says, Yeah, I always
bring Jordy to synagogue
and everything is fine.
Jordy enjoys going to

21

synagogue?
Jordy loves it. I was talking
to Rabbi Shem Tov a couple
years ago. I explain that
Jordy doesnt talk, so just like
a blind person hears better,
Jordy feels thing very deeply.
So thats why you bring
Jordy to synagogue every
weekend?
Yeah, its really solidified
our friendship. Before
it was just me taking

Jordy to synagogue, now


everyone wants to take
Jordy to synagogue because
they want to get the same
experience Jordy gets.
So, for the times Cary is not
with Jordy at the Soul Center.
I get to see the real progress
Cary has made with Jordy.Its
tough, just like any project
I start with any of the other
artists. Its extremely hard

getting Jordy to set goals


for himself and I can be the
one to tell you exactly what
goals Jordy has. Like some
of Jordys goals are to get
away from me. One way Ive
helped Jordy continue in
the process of creating new
things is making a list for
him. With every completion
on his list, we celebrate.

22

23

This is how I need to view the world. I need to simplify my issues,


not everything needs to have details. Not everything needs to hurt
you; not if youre strong. The worlds not a scary place.

24

25

LINDSEY

26

Lindsey communication skills fall bellow


Megans, Retrospectively though she can
say more than Jordy. Lindsey and I are
both hard at work on all her different
projects like making her pillows and
drawing One Direction. We move threw
each project by discussing her likes and
dislikes. While Im working with Lindsey I
am also talking to Carry about Jordy and
we were going nowhere on her drawing
foundations. Some days I pretend I am a
computer with two windows open its
crazy but its how I try to get things done.

27

Lindsey calls everyone


crazy. But in reality, I think
shes calling the world
crazy because from my
experiences the patience
of the world is limited for
people like Lindsey or Jordy.
But, shes crazy in the best
way possible. She has an
undeniable love for One
Direction and we had
plans to draw them later.
At the moment we are
drawing squares, circles,
and triangles for practice
purposes. When Lindsey
picks up the pen to draw her
favorite band it never comes
out the way she wants it
to and she wants to be as
talented as Megan.

After holding her hand


through the basics I
needed to set her free and
break my ways with babying
her. Her pen constantly
goes in one direction filled
with circles and love. She
expresses herself through
One Direction. It starts with
circles in the center. Then
her pen starts wrapping
around all the ideas I
initially set forward for
her to draw to push her
to create new things. But
as I said she draws One
Direction every time.
I dont tell her to stop; its
important to keep Lindsey
going because she can

28

be like stop and go traffic.


Stomping on the brake
pedal sets her off into space
staring at whats above the
world. It makes me think
shes looking for something
new to draw but shes not.
With a little motivation shes
a speed racer driving like she
knows what shes doing.
During pit stops I try to bring
her out of outer space by
spending time getting to
know her. Lindsey starts
telling me about her journey
from the west side of Michigan
to the east side of the state.
She left the rolling hills of
western Michigan where she
had all the time in the world
to wander earth. Now when

She names her


pillow flowers
for its pink and green colors.

she tries wandering she


has to sit and let her mind
wander. Lindseys horse
Raider lives there.
I recall when she first
mentions her horse. A
week ago we started
her pillow which is still
a work in progress. The
way Lindsey works on
her pillow reflects the
same motion of petting
a horse. She is extremely
gentle with her horse
based off how she moves
her needle with such
care. Everything is going
well with the pillow, but
when I lose focus Lindsey
loses focus. She gets off
track and forgets to bring
the needle around the
loom so the string wraps
around the loom in the
wrong direction.

29

She names her pillow flowers


for the vivid pinks and greens
threads she chooses which
are woven like a bouquet.

colors. She
makes her pillow with so
much energy that it feels like
the roses are exploading.
Its a montage of

I have lots of things in


common with Lindsey. My
attention span only lasts
so long. Finding my focus
when working with Lindsey
is difficult as it is with Jordy
and sometimes Megan.
They share a common trait;
if you dont put your focus
into either of them you lose
them. I dont have focus.
I have the same attention
span that Megan has.

Though her pillow is still


a work in progress we
are in the middle of her
illustration. Im busy now
encouraging Lindsey to
bring her abstract rendition
of One Direction alive
which makes the creases
of her cheeks glow with
admiration. As she trashes
her pen back and forth she
is creating a ruthless crowd
in the background. Shes
unrelenting with her strokes
at this point in the drawing.
She draws the crowd with
lots of back and forth strokes.
Her paper is the stage and
as her pen crosses the paper
she begins to almost crowd
surf. When she finishes this
piece shell be the hero.

30

With every rendition of One


Direction I become confused.
Whether Im actually looking
at One Direction or not Im still
proud of her every time she gets
anything done.

31

32

Lindsey went to a One Direction


concert once and she reminds
me every day how much fun she
had through sharing her story
and drawing One Direction. With
every rendition of One Direction
I become confused. Whether Im
actually looking at One Direction
or not Im still proud of her every
time she gets anything done.

33

34

I walk around and I see


people playing bingo.
I dont see Stanleys bright eyed
faces or the kid from the past who
could go from being at the computer
to not finishing a card game.

Then spending the rest of


the night confronting the
TV by cheering his team on.

STANLEY

35

36

The next day I decide I need


to see the world from a new
perspective, thats not the
Soul Center. I am visiting
Stanley, a family friend.
Stanley is maturing and
growing into an amazing
young man. Not only is
his facial hair growing, but
there are aspects to his
maturity that blow me away.
Stanley is living in a group
home in Southfield. A group
home is a facility for people
with mental illness and
special needs adults. It gives
them independence. Being
in a group home is the
best situation for Stanley
because it provides him
independence. Today I am
going over there to catch up
with him and then take him
for dinner.
My mom, dad, and I went
out with Stanleys parents a
couple weeks ago for dinner
where I start learning

about Stanleys progress.


his family members tell me
he lives with three other
people but he dont really
hang out with them much
because they are all girls.
I ask Stanleys mom what
does Stanley want to do
when hes older?
hes really interested in
working with kids hes
always had an interest in
working with kids because
he used to be a counselor
at a camp and he always
had fun joking around with
the kids. Currently Stanley
is attending Oakland
Community College where
he studies English, but hes
not really sure what he
wants to be when he grows
up.

The group home is part

37

of an organization that
also has a recreation
center. I go to the center
to pick up Stanley so I
can interview him. From
nowhere, this man with
special needs stops me.
I feel under attack by a
random person; he keeps
coming at me from all
angles.Hes wearing a
black fedora, dark shades,
and a long black shirt that
dangles off his hands. His
pants are torn to shreds.
Hey man, whats up? Where
you going? He pretends
to know me, like weve
met before. But, we never
met before. He comes at
me from all angles. He
is inadvertently isolating
me from the group home
where he lives. The feeling
of confrontation shook me
sideways.

Im trying to go downstairs
to see an old friend. Do you
know Stanley?
An old friend you say?
My name is Matt, nice to
meet you; say you got
a cigarette? Here I am
figuratively hanging upside
down like he is trying to
shake me and keep me
from entering. Though I
listen to him I used the skills
I gained at the soul center
to me and Im patient.
I dont smoke, I say.
Thats ok smoking is bad
for you, Im trying to quit
you see.
The guy starts following
me as I try to walk in,
bombarding me with
different things. Hes
quite the gatekeeper to
getting to the center,
keeping me from seeing
my dear old friend.
Getting through him is
tough and in theory Im
telling him what my needs
are but he has no sense
to show me around the
center. It is clear that this
center is not my home or
where my friends hang out.

He continues as we are
walking together, Dude
I got a job for you if you
want one.
No thank you, I have one.
Its cool, its not a hard
job. I do it all the time.
Im not interested. Im
looking for the elevator.

group home. A group of


psychiatric nurses are
hanging in somewhat of
an arts and crafts room,
nowhere near state of the
art. One of their members
is roaming. He is a silent
viewer, observing the
people in front of him like
they are in a fishbowl. He
walks by me. I reach out to
shake his hand.

Hi, Im Zach nice to meet


Passing the gate keeper feels you. I stop the observer in
like an accomplishment.
his tracks. He introduces
Getting into the elevator
himself but all I hear is, Hi
feels weirdly peaceful. Getting Im studying psychiatry.
off the elevator I walk into
the view of a nursing home
What are you guys
expecting to see Stanley
doing here?
or at least people my age. I
walk around and I see people Oh Im here with Oakland
playing bingo but I dont
University. I ask myself is
see Stanleys bright face or
thats your first or last name.
the kid from the past who
could go from being at the
I go to the College for
computer to not finishing
Creative Studies and Im
a card game and then
searching for my friend
spending the rest of the night Stanley. Have you seen
confronting the TV by yelling him? He stares me Like
at the sports game.
Im an endless hall of
hospital beds and he
Being in this basement
doesnt even care what
is like being worlds away.
my friends name is.
With no friendly faces in
sight how am I going to
So youre not a client?
find Stanley? Also, I am
not the only visitor at this

38

To myself I say Correct!


Stop knocking on the
glass of my own personal
fish bowl.
He continues, Youre
an artist, whats your
medium? Screaming
to myself, Hey captain
obvious. Give these people
youre observing a chance.
They are artists too.
Continuing, I have not
seen your friend, maybe
hes in the library.
Sure, I say out loud, but he
must have some evil plan
to tie my friend up in the
library and read his favorite

book to Stanley.
Finally, I hear Stanley Is that
you Zach? Sorry, I didnt
hear my text, I didnt know
you were here.
Here I am seeing an
old friend and no one
welcomes me as a friend.
My feelings run through me
with caution. I feel removed
from my identity; I am what
others think I am. Finally
after running through
the judgements of those
surrounding me I catch up
with my friend Stanley.
I interview him because I
want to see where he is in

39

life as it had been a while


since Ive seen him. Stanley
hasnt been to the Soul
Center yet, but after school
lets out, he promises me
hell be there. On the way
to the photo shoot and
interview, Stanley and I
have a chance to talk. I ask
him, Do you remember
when I babysat for you
and was I any good at it?
I remembered babysitting
for Stanley and I know that
I wasnt always the best, but
we had a great time playing
video games together.
Zach, that was so long ago.
I dont know. I liked playing
video games with you.

Those were good times.


Yeah, but I dont need a
babysitter anymore.
Youre right; youre your
own man now. Thats so
exciting right?
Sure.
Some things about
Stanley havent changed.
His addiction to his phone
is real, just like everyone
elses. He still loves baseball.
I recalled the last time I
saw Stanley, it was at his
graduation party where
he couldnt sit still, hed be
everywhere at the same time.

He still has this problem,


but its more subtle; he has
really grown to be patient.
However while we chat he
sits still the entire time.
Stanley and I are chatting
about baseball because
Stanley absolutely loves
baseball.

out the score years ago,


now he sits a little more
peacefully talking about the
game.

His mother confirms the


fact that he still loves
baseball, but when he
tried to play it never really
worked out for him. Instead
Yeah I was just checking
of baseball, he used to
the score for opening day
bowl, sing and act. He
Tigers are up by 10.
played the mechanical in A
Midsummer Nights Dream,
Awesome, is this the year
a pilot in Peter Pan and a
that they are going to win
pickpocket in Oliver. Though
the World Series?
he wasnt a great singer,
he was destined to act on
I hope they picked up some stage.
really good pitchers.
When he was younger,
I remember Stanley yelling
he went to Hillel of

40

Metropolitan Detroit, a
small Jewish day school and
the Frankel Jewish Academy
for high school. Because
they are small schools, he
wasnt generally picked on.
People were usually nice
and let him sit next to them
at lunch.
Although he did tell me
about a kid who made fun
of him, but that kid was
kicked out of school. I also
went to the Jewish Academy
and felt accepted. There
was this kid named Jamie
who used to pick on me
in middle school; once he
put lotion on his hand and
pretended it was another
substance. But, we all grow

up with time; at a small


school he had to accept me
because we had every class
together.
As a kid Stanley traveled
a lot with his family,
but Stanley is not a kid
anymore and now he has
to do adult things, like
go to college, find a job
and do his laundry. Being
independent is one of
Stanleys goals. During the
year that Stanley lived in
Florida, he learned many
social skills and now hes
even starting to cook.
While in Florida he made
new friends who are also
special needs, they hung
out, socialized and lived

41

together. According to
Stanley, the place where
he stayed was awesome.
Right now Stanley tutors
kids after school and we
discuss the idea of possibly
continuing to be a tutor. I
hope he follows through
on his promise to go to the
Soul Center because I think
hed be great at facilitating
art projects.

Stanley loves to talk about his family. He has the best


parents in the world, Sylvia and Randy. According to Stanley,
They love me and care about me and have cared about me
since the day I was born. He and his family go to Tiger and
Red Wing games, and he loves going to the University of
Michigan football games. Stanleys favorite baseball player is
Miguel Cabrera. They even named their dog after Cabrera;
they call him Pudge. He is truly inspired by his greatgrandfather, Max Fisher.
He made a great impact on Israel and the city (of Detroit)
and the country. Changing the world is also Stanleys goal;
he wants to make peace in Israel. His travels have taken
him to Israel three times. Stanley is an adult and he is
independent, hes grown to be patient and though he still
cant look you in the eyes hes working on that. There is a
slight tone of insecurity in his voice. For me, looking at my
own future, getting a job is scary; the world is full of fear. Yet
according to my brother, fear is a natural emotion.

42

43

44

My brother is an inspiration to all.


Hes one of the reasons I got back
into volunteering. Hes my brother,
a rabbi and a coordinator at the

Friendship Circle.
I left the Group home to go chat with
my brother. I need answers to my
questions about special needs adults
in order to defeat the perception they
are kids, because they are adults.

Whats changed for people with special


needs now that they are adults from
when I was a teen volunteer?

JORDAN

My brother gave my journey


perspective because we are
discussing the changes I am
enduring. He tells me, What
changes for special needs
adults is their stage of life.
When you knew them they
were in middle school or
high school; what they were
doing were typical activities
for middle school or high
schoolers. As you grow up
youre moving into your
career, for them its a bit
trickier. So the Soul Center
is a way for them to also
move into their career and
having a plan will make them
feel like adults as well.
Jordan sees friendships
blossom every day. For the
past six years my brother
has been responsible for
overseeing the friendships
between the teen
volunteers and special
needs kids. But the candor

he spoke with really shows


his understanding for my
situation. I appreciate
his knowledge for what
the adults with special
needs endure every day. I
remember him being there
for Megan, Jordy, Lindsey,
and Stanley when they
were actually kids and not
perceived as kids.
Some of their initial
friendships start out as
once a week activities
and blossom into life time
friends. In the same way
Cary and Jordy are best
friends, I need guidance
in becoming best friends
for life with my new best
friends at the Soul Center.
So, like how are
the programs at the
Friendship Circle changing
to fit my friends now that
they are adults?

46

The pressing issue


concerning me all day is
compairing the treatment
of the Friendship Circle and
Soul Center in comparison
to the recreation center
where I couldnt find
one good friend except
Stanley. Pretty much no
one wanted me there.
Why did I feel so much
at home at Friendship
Circle?:
Since you were at the
Friendship Circle the
programming has changed
in many ways. The
programs are constantly
growing as were constantly
professionalizing our
programing. But, were
also trying to keep things
based on the foundation of
friendship. Their situation
at the Soul Center is similar
to what we have within our

kids division, which is a


friendship between a kid
with special needs and a
teen volunteer.
That simplifies things
for me, thanks Jordan. It
feels good to be one of
those members in the
community, so what about
the Soul Center?
Jordan took a slight pause.
My thoughts are exploring
yesterday, when Megan
and I discover we both
have a lot in common.
People continue to
question us and our skills,
but we endure. Because
of this I am able to better
understand Megan as an
adult. Even though I did
question her age.
Jordans eyes understood
my thoughts and
continued, The Soul
Center is following in the
path where were trying
to provide friendship
and eliminate isolation
for people as they grow
up and for adults with

47

special needs; thats the


challenge, the world can
seem isolating to them. This
is providing an opportunity
for them to feel valued,
supported, included, and
helps them find friends.
I look back on the day and
without the Soul Center,
I would never have been
able to connect with
Megan. Megan displays
all the confidence in the
world, but still semi-feels
isolated from the world

around her. She doesnt


keep in touch with her
old friends from high
school because many of
them dont see her as a
part of their friend group
or life any more. Shes
afraid to reconnect with
them out of fear of not
fitting in. And I could help
her fit in and make art but
she might stay shy.
I ask, Why is finding a
job hard for someone
with special needs?

48

Its a bit trickier. The


challenges and the competition
out there is exceedingly
difficult. Everyone wants
everyone to do everything
in this day and age. Theyre
competing in the real world
and thats challenging.
The competition is real at
the Soul Center. Lindsey
got caught up in the
competition the other day.
Lindsey was in awe of Becky
whos an amazing illustrator.

I mean yesterday I saw how


she could stipple. My other
friends are witnessesto
her talents, and they are
as jealous as I am. Then
Lindsey and my other
friends start attempting
to draw as well as Becky
without much success.
Beckys mother mentions
when she picks Becky
up from the Soul Center,
Becky has been drawing
since she was five. When
she was younger she used

to draw people without


their nose. Now she can
almost draw professional
illustrations with a little help
from people like Brian, whos
a professional illustrator.
Yesterday I recall Brian
teaching Megan and
another girl how to draw.
They are both tracing a
persons face and practicing
the motion of drawing
someones face. Then
they take their new skill
to the paper and attempt

49

duplicating the persons


face. However, he isnt
teaching Lindsey how
to draw. I am in charge
of Lindsey and Lindsey
feels like she is ultimately
going to fall behind. Each
individual needs individual
attention and sometimes
someone feels left out.
I need to figure out how
I will deal with a situation
like this if it were to occur
again. I ask, How could I
have helped Lindsey feel

included?
Jordan answers, When
Im at the Friendship
Circle everyone has value,
a purpose, everyone is
equal in that purpose and
everyone is equal in Gods
eyes. This is why I work at
the Friendship Circle which
is focused on friendship and
equality with the idea of
inclusion and support. My
brother believes these ideas
are a necessity, not only in
special needs; its meant for
anyone who needs it.
The fact is that Lindsey
is behind Meagan, and
Becky may have skill or
talent; but the other fact
is that I am there for her,
giving her the inclusion
and support by being a
friend and teaching her
the foundations of art,
which is shape and line.
I am giving her the tools
she needs in order for
her to create she wants.
Whether its horses, flowers,
or One Direction.
I am learning how to
specialize in friendship. I
look up to my brother, he
does this every day for a
living. For instance Cary,

who Ive met before and


my father knew, dedicates
himself to being Jordys
friend. Sometimes while
making art I forget Jordy
is in the room because he
cant talk or communicate
what he wants to draw, he
just draws.
My brother and I literally
spend an hour trying to
define friendship together;
and how I can be a better
friend to people like Jordy
who cant communicate
what he needs. We find its
all about being there for
people when they need it
most. My brother helps me
further understand the idea
of friendship though. When
I reach out to people who
need it sometimes its a phone
call, a visit, sometimes its
an ongoing friendship and
sometimes while the person
is giving friendship they are
getting well.
With the competitive world
special needs live in, it can
be hard to make your way
because not everyone is
inclusive. It takes people
like my brother and others
to rise up to the challenge
and find ways to give them
a leg up and help them

50

make it in this world. His


team believes everyone
has a value, everyone has
a purpose and everyone
is equal in that purpose,
because everyone is equal
in the eyes of God.
Getting the best out of
Jordy is very important to
me; though Im not sure
how I can do this because
we cant communicate.
How do you get the best
out of your own team?
We try to get the best
out of everyone who
comes through our doors;
the real way is being as
professional as possible.
At the end of the day if
something isnt working its
either the programing isnt
going well or sometimes
the staff isnt doing a good
job. There has to be an
issue and my team and
I work hard together to
find these issues. We
dont sit around and try
to blame each other; we
rectify the issue to get the
best out of everyone.
This felt good to me, the
reality is Jordy isnt Picasso
yet.Its not my fault, its how
the world works.

51

Then there is Stanley


whom I use to baby sit
and attend sports night
with. When I played
sports with my friends
back in the day some of
them were picked last or
totally un-included and
not treated fairly. What

can I do to make sure


people are treated fairly
in this case?
Adults with special needs
have trouble being treated
fairly at times by different
people. A lot of things my
brother does for people
with special needs, like

52

sports night, are developed


to include people, whom at
one point in time werent
able to play sports in high
school or elementary
school because they
werent included. Jordan
continues, I used to run an
anti-bullying program called
Up Standers because

some people were unincluded and the point was


to get people to not be
mean, either intentionally
or inadvertently.
Immediately I recall my
experience with Megan
who has started her new
quilt because she had
finished her old quilt at
the old Soul Center. She
has been working so hard
to regain her confidence,
to stand up and say she
wants to make new
friends. The friends
she thought she had were
not true friends to her.
How does art help artists
like Megan who may have
been mistreated and
bullied as a kid?
Art is a wonderful form.
First off self-expression
is a way of expressing
who and whats on the
inside; and for people with
special needs, they struggle
with communication.
Making a work of art is an
amazing way for them to
communicate with others.
Other than that art is a way
people compete on a level
playing field that is semiequal. A person with special
needs may not be able to

communicate or do certain
things. However, they can
still produce art. Especially
in todays day and age, there
are some art systems they
may be better at, where
they can learn the systems
and do it to get a great job.
They can use the 3D printer
or laser cutter and they can
produce great things too.
I cant wait to see
what they produce.
Jordan continues So while
art is born from therapy, it
actually is a way for them
to create things they can
sell and they will have a
job bringing out their skill
sets and talents.
Talking about the art one
creates, to me and many
other designers I go to
school with is perceived
as egotistical. You are
showing off what you can
do because youre Mr. or
Ms. I can do it all and
youve always been known
as the one who can do it
all. Maybe it is that we have
been doing this craft for
years and were tired of
talking about our amazing,
pure talent. Not all the
individuals at the Soul

53

Center have this innate


talent.
Theres a sense of humble
pride roaring through
the individuals at the
Soul Center. Some are
discovering they bring
something unique to the
table of their new facility.
Some of them have hidden
talents they never thought
theyd be good at, like
choosing a color and being
proud they love different
colors; I shouldnt take this
for granted. Pride radiates
from these individuals
whenever they finish
anything. What do you
know of the talents that the
special needs at the Soul
Center have and express?

Theres an adult in the Soul Center who sold


their first piece of art and got their first pay check
ever. Theres pride in making a paycheck, theres
a pride in trying to make something. Theres
pride, self-esteem, and theres confidence that
comes with all the different parts.
The idea of the Soul Center, the place where I
volunteer, these individuals are not playing a
big kids game; its not a part of the Friendship
Circle for this reason. The idea is to treat
people like adults. Here they really work, they
ultimately learn a lot from their mistakes,
and they are really advancing in life like their
friends who went on to college. Additionally,
College might not be right for everyone.

54

55

UNSTOPPABLE

ZACH
BLUM
STEIN

56

COPYWRITING

My intention is to always
stay unstoppable. To
do this I must question
everything. Pretend to know
nothing and routinely learn
everything.
Five years ago, I finished
my volunteering at The
Friendship Circle. I played
my role in this organization
for seven years before
attending the College for
Creative Studies.
I thought I was done helping
People with special needs.
But, its been months since
Ive seen my friends. It was
time to reconnect. A friend
of mine deserves respect.
They should be treated with
humanity. Whether they are
an adult or a kid.
Though some of my friends
tend to still act childish it
might not be apparent but
theyve matured a lot.

It differs from person to


person. But my friends
from High School who
have special needs had a
designated person who
guided them on their
journey though life.
With graduation coming
up soon it was time to go
back to my roots. I needed
to find out what made me
kind, patient, human, and
unstoppable. Those are the
qualities I respect about
myself and always look for
in others.
To find out where my friends
are in their stage of life read
my book. To get my book
first, take a picture of my
work and tag @Blummer92
on Instagram. Ill send a post
back and tell you if you won.
%10 of proceeds
go to the Friendship Circle.

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