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How To Speak So People Really Listen Sample Chapter
How To Speak So People Really Listen Sample Chapter
eChapter
CONTENTS
Foreword
Introduction: Why this stuff really matters
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Introduction:
Why this stuff really matters
Your ability to
influence others,
build your career, and
achieve your personal
goals is dependent
on how effectively
you communicate and
engage with people.
Knowing
the words to a
song doesnt make
you a great singer.
Neither does
having expertise in
a subject make you
a great speaker.
And heres both a harsh and sad fact. Some people have
values and views many would find offensive. But they get
heard. They get noticed. Not simply because of what they
believe, but because of how well they communicate their
message. Criminals and politicians can manipulate minds
because theyve developed the skills of knowing how to
persuade others. Yes, other factors and skills do come
into play, but if theyre unable to communicate effectively
their influence is weakened. Their voice is less likely to be
heard.
Heres the deal:
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Good people
with a great
message are
not guaranteed
a captive
audience.
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Everything
is obvious in
hindsight. But it
will only seem
obvious once
youve read it.
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But despite that Ive done OK. Ive spoken around the
world. From Bolton to Bali, Rochdale to Reykjavik, and
Todmorden to Tehran, Ive spoken to over a quarter of
a million people in forty countries to date. Some have
willingly paid to hear me speak. Others were sent by their
boss and clearly wanted to be somewhere else.
So how, with such a rather ordinary, unspectacular
background, have I managed to develop a successful
speaking career?
Clearly the support of others is crucial. And Im not
denying that luck will have played a part. My books have
clearly raised my profile, but not to the extent that I can be
described as being particularly well known. Im not. But
heres something I have done. Ive worked incredibly hard
on two things.
First, my message what Im actually going to say. For
me content is crucial. Second, I worked hard at how Im
going to deliver that message. Its been an obsession
at times. But its reaped some rewards, and in this book
Im going to draw less upon academic theories and more
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Ive split the book into three main sections. The first looks
at the Seven Great Sins of Speaking, and is followed
by Eight Great Ways to Speak so People Really Listen.
Finally, I include a short section called Im Glad You
Asked That, which explores the top three questions Im
asked about speaking.
By the time we finish, youll have a toolkit of ideas and
actions you can use. Some will be more relevant and
used more regularly than others. Thats to be expected.
Communication is a vast topic and is played out in a
variety of contexts and settings, both in and outside of the
workplace. Use what is appropriate for your situation but
be aware of the rest you never know when you might
need them.
Right, I think were ready.
So lets begin our journey together and start with some of
the most common mistakes communicators make when
presenting their message. I wonder how many youve
sometimes been guilty of and have perhaps witnessed
others doing? Lets find out.
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Part 1:
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Sin 1:
A Failure To Make Your Message
or
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We need
to learn how to
cover our message
in Velcro, rather
than coat it with
Teflon.
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Your
message
needs to stick
if its going to
be a hit.
Repetition is one way to do that. Well be exploring lots
more ways throughout the book, but let me share one
approach Ive used to make my message sticky and
memorable using visual and quirky language. And
the reason? Well the reality is, the more people hear
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The unfamiliar
gets our
attention. And
through repetition
it also gets
remembered.
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Having a great
message is one
thing. Getting
it remembered
is another
entirely.
My One Thing
Pause for Thought
Think about the ways you communicate your
messages to others. Could your approach ever be
described as boring or bland? Do you say things the
way youve always said them? If not, great; but if you
do, then perhaps its time to freshen up your style.
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