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Emely Callejas
Professor Jennifer Rodrick
QS 115
23 October 2016
Queer Spaces
Living in a non idealistic society, one has to fit and conform to others standards. Being
in the LGBTQ community, there are expected behavior that comes with being gay, lesbian,
transgender,etc everywhere. The space around people forces one to stick with only one label.
Nevertheless we can change our labels, but as long as we identified as one of the labels provided.
The LGBTQ community has to create their identity with the stereotypes in society and conform
to what others make them believe is right by forcing religious practices on them, harassing them
or just being afraid of being judged because they dont fit into the normal category.
When coming out of the closet, there will always be people expecting you to be their
definition of a queer individual. Wherever you are, it is common sense to act or dress
appropriately because those people expect it from you to play the role. Nash writes in article
about interviewing a male about being gay and to what limits does he become gay enough in
public situations. I do make decisions about how queer I want to look based on where Im
going and who Im going to be talking to and generally that's an empowering choice for me
(Nash). The interviewee only feels he is in control of his life is when he has to be a certain type
of queer. He doesn't want to be stand out in a bad way because he feels being apart of the
LGBTQ is already causing unwanted attention. He limits himself to whom he wants to display
because he doesn't want discrimination from others if he doesn't fit their standards. In another

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interview he talks to a guy named George about how he labels himself according the societys
categories. For example, in my conversation with George, he argued against being positioned
within pre-existing categories of legibility and recognition. He felt that these categories impose a
stability and certainty about identity that is too narrow a referencing system for life experiences
(Nash). Even with queer labels, there is still not enough to identify everyone's stories. They have
to confine to what is given if they want to fit in. Although people come out to their true
sexuality, they are still constricted to limits. These stereotypes confine the identity of the queer
individual because of limited freedom of expression.
Deciding to open about your sexuality can feel like a weight lifted off your shoulder but
in some cases, it can add more than one can handle. In The Full Spectrum by David Levithan, a
girls father founds out she is lesbian through a phone conversation. He is unaccepting at the fact
that she is lesbian and makes her go see a priest leaving her in an anger state. A priest. I told my
dad it wasnt going to do anything, but Ill go to his church and Ill talk to his priest. Its not
going to change me(Canale 43). Her father pushed religion onto her hoping it will change who
she is. This made her conform to what he thought was right for her according to his beliefs. In
reality, it traumatized her because she saw no support coming from her father. Being outed could
backfire on you. Another story in The Full Spectrum, an individual decides to come out as
transgender from female to male. She tells her program director to call her Alex and use
pronouns such as he,his and him. Thinking that my attraction to girls could only identify me as
a dyke, I identify as just that. I was, in that program, known as Heather the dyke. ( Rasmussen
74)The author wanted to be known as a male but according to his peers, he could nothing to
convince them out of the dyke term. The director tells them no that they cant be a female

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because they were born otherwise. This makes the reader believe that the director didnt want the
others to know about gender change and ask questions she cant provide the answers to. In the
book Composing Gender another individual describes her bathroom situation as a transgender.
When I first transitioned, I became temporarily disabled since the administration interim
solution was that I use the single access handicapped restroom on a different floor of my
building (Doan 60-61). Disable means a person having a physical or mental condition that
limits movements, senses, or activities. If being unable wasnt bad enough due to her gender,
the door had no lock leaving any of her students to walk in and no privacy for Petra Doan.
Overcoming the sexuality barrier can be challenging, however it can open many pathways to
finding your identity.
Verbal abuse and sexual assault contributes to forming the queer identity because even in
a space are you feel you are safe to be yourself, you are vulnerable in many ways. In Composing
Gender, Petra Doan talks about her experience in an elevator with a man trying to expose her.
By squeezing my breasts he was objectifying and assaulting what young (1998) calls the most
visible sign of womans femininity. In my case he assumed he was attacking my false femininity
to expose me for an imposter (Doan 58). The man that assaulted her knew his actions were
wrong. Although to him, just because she was transgender, he thought his action was justitfy
because she wasnt normal. This trauma made Petra Doan think its okay to sexually assault
her because she is different, that it comes with being apart of queer community. The writer
also shares her experiences in her home where you think she would feel the most safe in the
world. Petra Doan notes that it is her voice that forms who she is over the phone. Callers who
do not know me invariably hear my voice and assume that I am male. However, many callers

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refuse to disbelieve their ears and continue this pronoun abuse by calling me Mister and Sir
(Doan 62). Many people dont understand how the little pronouns can cause pain to transgender
individual. No one should have to go through that mental abuse because the trauma can make a
person believe its okay.
A lot of people have fear and uncertainty about coming out because they wouldnt meet
the expectations feel like they dont belong anywhere. In a Ted Talk video, the speaker Morgana
Bailey talks about how she thought her coworkers would think hey if shes a lesbian, then she
must be a dyke, that she has to be masculine. She didnt want her sexuality to define who she
is. She says many times in the video she wants to know as just Morgana, not my lesbian friend
Morgana or my gay coworker Morgana. She didnt want to carry around the invisible labels
everywhere she went. Morgana Bailey talks about how people conform at work because its
beneficial to a long term career advancement. Many like Morgana Bailey have to conform to the
environment surrounding them even if it means not being themselves. In The Full Spectrum,
talks about trying to fit in even though they know they cant because people would think theyre
abnormal. At homecoming while the rest of the girls were worrying about whether their nails
were an even coat, I was trying and retrying on the same dress every year, hoping it would be
just enough to get through the night without a whole lot of attention. ...There was no winning,
and certainly no passing as that kind of girl even when I tried (Wehman 246). The author felt
they had to portray a girl to be normal. The writer had to hide who they were even if it meant
being uncomfortable. In another video titled Why Are Queer Spaces Important talks about how
people shouldnt have feel unsafe or abnormal. Especially since a young queer individual
shouldnt have to go through life thinking they dont have a place to call home. In some third

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world countries, there isnt a place for an LGBTQ individual to call home because theyre still in
the process of developing a more diverse society. Being afraid in a space can affect the outcome
of ones identity because they tend to hold back their true self.
Trying to fit in can be depriving to ones individuality. Being anywhere can be influential
to anybody in the LGBTQ community. Being labeled, harassed and having religion strictly
forced on one can really affect their lifestyle. That they are always in the wrong and they have to
change who they are to satisfy others. What they dont know is theyre helping others find
comfort in being in the LGBTQ community. No one is never really alone. There is also someone
else in the world that is in the fight with you.

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Works Cited
Groner, Rachael, and John F. O'Hara. Composing Gender. N.p.: n.p., n.d. Print.

Levithan, David, and Billy Merrell. The Full Spectrum: A New Generation of Writing about Gay,
Lesbian, Bisexual, Transgender, Questioning, and Other Identities. New York: Knopf, 2006.
Print.

Nash, Catherine Jean. "Trans Experiences in Lesbian and Queer Space." Canadian Geographer / Le
Gographe Canadien, 55.2 (2011): 192-207.

TED. The danger of hiding who you are | Morgana Bailey. Online Video Clip. Youtube, 23 Jan.
2015. Web. 19 Oct. 2016.

Queerest of the Queer. Why Are Queer Spaces Important? Online Video Clip. Youtube, 4 Sept. 2015.
Web. 19 Oct. 2016.