Characters:

Child
Doctor

I Went to the Doctor

Child:

I went to the doctor,

all covered in bumps.
He said,

Doctor:

Youve got whooping cough,

tetanus, rubella,
digestive dysfunction
from green salmonella.

Youre covered with head lice,

mosquitoes, and fleas.
Youve even got pinkeye
and mad cow disease.

Whats more, youve got cooties,

a cold, and the flu,
but dont be upset;
I know just what to do.

Child:

He told me,

Doctor:

I promise
this wont hurt a bit.

Child:

Then grabbed a syringe

like a barbecue spit.
 He made me bend over
the seat of my chair,
then plunged that big needle
in my you-know-where.

So now Im all cured

of my cooties and fleas,
my whooping cough, measles,
and mad cow disease.

He cured me of every last

sniffle and bump,
and now Im all better
except for my rump.

THE END!