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Abigail Loftis

Instructor: Malcom Campbell

English 1104

April 6th, 2017

Building Relationships: Destroyed by the Digital Age?

Your friend is on the other side of the table. You met up with her for brunch on a warm

Saturday morning at your favorite little breakfast place. As you sit in your favorite booth she

begins to tell you about her past week or two. She's met this new guy (Eric maybe? No, it was

John) she is obsessing over; they haven't stopped talking since they exchanged numbers at the

gym a while back. Suddenly your phone vibrates, you look down to check the notification. You

look back up you realize your friend has asked you a question. Having completely missed what

she said you nod shyly hoping it was the response she was looking for or perhaps you ask her to

repeat herself explaining you got distracted. Different variations of this scenario play out every

day among acquaintances, close friends, family, and even spouses. Why has this become such a

common occurrence? Psychologists point to one common denominator which seems to play a

role in all of these scenarios alike: technology, specifically smart phones(The iPhone Effect).

This paper investigates the effect smartphones have on adolescents and young adults.

This generation was born into an age of technology. Some argue this has hindered their ability to
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interact with each other in a healthy manner, while others say technology has benefitted this

generation as well as generations to come. This debate is not a new one; many young adults will

tell you there was at least one instance where someone in an older generation told them cell

phones were having a negative impact on their lives be it their thumbs would fall off or they

were addicted to their phone,, etc. To investigate the effects phones have on young adults, I am

going to look specifically at how phones effect ones ability to be alone, how phones effect

relationships with those in their immediate circle (family, best friends, significant others), and

how phones effect relationships with those whom you aren't as close to (acquaintances, co-

workers, lesser friends).

Rise of the Digital Age

The reason our generation is so in tune with technology could be because of how it has

advanced during our lives and the years leading up to this period. While other generations did

grow up with some technology our generation is the first to be fully immersed in technology.

The effects of this are starting to be seen as a generation wide phenomena. Telecommunication

first started in 1876 when Alexander Graham Bells phone made the first successful phone call in

the United States of America. At this time phones would still be reserved for the highest of

officials and those who could afford to purchase such an expensive commodity. By 1900 the

technology within phones became more refined allowing them to be used in most major cities

and just fifteen years later a call was able to be made across the continent. By 1956 people were

able to make long distance calls without the assistance of an operator to aid the transition. Just

seventeen years later in 1973, a phone call was able to be made from a portable phone
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(Telephone Timeline). Telephones were quickly developing and changing to become more

accessible to the general public as well as to be more user friendly. Meanwhile, much of

Generation X was reaching their teenage years; they were the first generation to experience an

abundance of technology in their childhood. Phones and technology continued become more

advanced at an exponential rate. By 1982 commercial cellular service was approved by the FCC

and only 18 years later there were 100 million people subscribed and using cell phones

(Telephone Timeline). By this time the last of the 90s kids were just being born and the

oldest were a few years shy of becoming teenagers. The Millennial generation expanded their

understanding and use of this technology at a rate matching that of the expansion itself because

they were growing up in a time where telephones and cellular phones were just beginning to hit

their peak in technological expansion. As they continued to grow the Millennial generation kept

technology with in reach. It became an extension of who they are and how they function.

Iphones and How They Effect Relationships

How phones have effected someones ability to be alone

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Walking around, anywhere, you might notice small children with their parents. If you are

sitting at a restaurant near someone will small children you will often notice at some point the

child will want to play on their parents phone. This often signifies the behavior is repeated at

home. Many children are no longer learning to occupy their own time and be able to play by

themselves but rather they are learning how to play while still being in constant contact of their

family. Psychologist Sherry Turkle attributes this phenomena to receiving iPhones and other

digital devices at a young age. This causes the child to never actually be fully alone but rather to

be in contact with someone at all times. This changes a fundamental stage in growing where

children typically are learning how to do things apart from their parents. This has led to a

generation of young adults who do not know how to be alone(Turkle). Even when children grow

to the age where they move out their parents are only one text or phone call away. If something

goes wrong (from a stain on their clothes to not knowing how to file taxes) they can just call

home to their parents can fix it rather than working through it theirselves.

How phones effect relationships with those whom you aren't as close to (acquaintances, co-

workers, lesser friends)

Using a cell phone in public is a major irritation for other people. Sixty-two percent of

participants agreed or strongly agreed with this phrase during a statistical survey conducted in

2005 by the University of Michigan. Of people in the age range of 18-27 thirty-two percent

agreed while seventy-four percent of people 60-68 agree (Ling 93). Cellphones are with us
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every second of the day. This leads to many consequences, one of which is known as poly-

consciousness. In this context poly-consciousness means our attention is divided, part our

attention is on the people we are with and the other part is on our phones(The iPhone Effect).

This hinders people from being fully alert to their current situations. This is harmful towards

relationships with others in the sense that you are never fully focused on them which often make

conversation more shallow and lessens personal connections. Not only can using your phone

make conversation more shallow it can hinder it completely. Along with this it can cause the

person you are supposed to be communicating with to feel ignored which can cause tension in

the relationship. These things often occur between friends (or other relationships) where the

people involved are not as close. The parties involved ignore the person in front of them in

order to talk to people they see theirselves closer to through their smartphones.

How phones effect relationships with those in their immediate circle (family, best friends,

significant others

Relationships with all people you are connected to can suffer on a face-to-face level

because of this inability to give undivided attention. However, cell phones do provide an

opportunity to communicate to those whose you wish to speak to. This was their original intent,

to communicate to those you are close to (emotionally) though you may not be close to them

(physically). This allows you to make plans, flirt, gossip, etc even when the one you are talking

to is not having a face-to-face conversation with you. In a field study done in Oslo High school
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the teenagers in the room, while listening to a presentation on this exact topic, were able to

communicate to their friends about many things including coordinating times and preferences to

see a movie with their friends(Ling 160). This level of ease to which people can reach others

allows people to connect on deeper levels as they are able to talk almost constantly. This also

provides a platform for communicating about sensitive topics that might otherwise be difficult as

people are often more relaxed when communicating over the phone as opposed to in person.

This ease of communication can prove to be useful in many cases.

CONCLUSION

Cell phones are powerful tools. They put the world at our fingertips. The key is learning

to control this unlimited access and use it to benefit your life rather than hinder it. Cell phones

can allow us to communicate with our closest friends and our loved ones 24/7 though they can

also hold us back from paying attention to people who we may not be as close to. Cell phones

can cause young children to grow dependent, and hinder them from flourishing on their own

though they allow children to contact family when they are needed. As a generation and a
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society that is growing up in the digital age, it is important to know when technology is helping

us and when we need to unplug.

WORKS CITED

American Psycological Association. N.p.,n.d.Web. 10 Mar. 2017. <http://www.apa.org/>.

Ling, Richard Seyler. New Tech, New Ties: How Mobile Communication Is Reshaping

Social Cohesion. Cambridge, MA: MIT, 2010. Print.

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Misra, Shalini; Cheng, Lulu; Genevie, Jamie; Yuan, Miao. The iPhone Effect: The

Quality of In-Person Social Interactions in the Presence of Mobile Devices.

Environment and Behavior, July 2014. doi: 10.1177/0013916514539755.

"Telephone Timeline - Greatest Engineering Achievements of the Twentieth

Century."Telephone Timeline - Greatest Engineering Achievements of the

Twentieth Century. N.p., n.d. Web. 05 Apr. 2017.

Turkle, Sherry . "In Constant Digital Contact, We Feel 'Alone Together'" Interview.

NPR. Fresh Air, 17 Oct. 2012. Web. 10 Mar. 2017.