Review For Zhan Wangs Essay

In this essay, you did a great job in defining and explaining the concept of

language community. Your explanation is very thorough and you incorporated the

references from the textbook in your explanation, which has some good sides and

downsides and I will articulate them later.

My first impression of your essay is that it looks well-organized and language

used is quite academic. Then given a closer look, I realized the majority of your essay

focuses articulating the concept of language community while lacks the explanation

of strategies and examples that you used in writing an informal register. At the

beginning of your writing, you mentioned you chose using WeChat as an example to

manifest how the impact of language community on peoples life or communication.

But later in your writing, you failed to give further explanation on how to connect

WeChat to the concept of language community. In this part, it makes me confused

bout the main point of your writing.

The good side of referring too much content from the textbook to explain the

concept of language community is that readers can have a very detailed and all-

around comprehension about the concept. However, the downside is that you didnt

use appropriate required MLA citation. Also, it would be better if you are able to

provide more explanatory and supportive examples when analyzing how language

community affects human communication and life and how WeChat can be used as an

example to prove your points.

There are minor grammatical errors in your essay but they do not affect much on

the understanding of the essay. In my own opinion, I think the language of the essay

overall is too wordy. It could be better if you can keep it more succinct, accurate and

straight to the point.