Mini Lesson 4- Stylistic Choices in Punctuation

Our Names: Chelsea Engel, Alejandro Bendana, Josie Faris, Holly Young
Intended Audience: 9th Grade English.
Standards:
- LAFS.3.RL.3.7 - Explain how specific aspects of a texts illustrations contribute to what is
conveyed by the words in a story (e.g., create mood, emphasize aspects of a character
or setting).

Focus Area: Students will be able to identify different punctuation choices made by an author
across different genres. Students will be able to have a discuss about why an author may have
made these stylistic choices and how it affects the writing as a whole.

Complements:

A.) Excerpt from Misery:

But the peace of the cloud was spoiled by the voice. The voice - which was a woman's voice -
said, 'Breathe! You must breathe, Paul!' Something hit his chest hard, and then foul breath was
forced into his mouth by unseen lips. The lips were dry and the breath smelled of the stale wind
in the tunnel of an underground railway; it smelled of old dust and dirt. He began to breathe
again so that the lips would not return with their foul breath.

B.) Excerpt from The Dark Man:

Ihave stridden the fuming way

of sun-hammered tracks and

smashed cinders;

I have ridden rails

and burned sterno in the

gantry silence of hob jungles:

I am a dark man.

I have ridden rails

and passed the smuggery

of desperate houses with counterfeit chimney

and heard from the outside

the inside clink of cocktail ice

while closed doors broke the world

and over it all a savage sickle moon

that bummed my eyes with bones of light.

Challenge (Alex):

Lets mess with the opening sentence of the first passage:

But the peace of the cloud was spoiled by the voice
What can we do that will alter the rhythm or intonation of that sentence?
Add some commas?
But, the peace of the cloud was spoiled by the voice.
But, the peace of the cloud, was spoiled by the voice.
Add a hyphen?
But the peace of the cloud was spoiled--by the voice.
Remove the conjunction?
The peace of the cloud was spoiled by the voice
What effect has brought forth to the phrase after each alteration?

Strategy:

Ask yourself a series of questions:

Why grammar? Why follow a set of rules?
Do we use grammar because Mrs./Mr, insert name here tells us to?
Do we use grammar because others will say and/or think were uneducated if we dont
follow these rules?
Do we understand how rhythm works in terms of reading?
How does syntax, diction, and punctuation affect the way we read a passage?
Could adding different punctuation marks to the same passage of words, could
the tone of the overall passage change? What about the genre?
Adding indentation could make a paragraph read more as a poem.
 Can you think of any instances in which the writing youve done in the past was edited to
add punctuation and it changed the tone of the piece?

Exploration:

Take a moment to read the excerpt from Misery (suspenseful novel) and the excerpt from The
Dark Man (poem)
Both are written by the same author. What differences can you identify in the punctuation used in
the poem and the punctuation used in the story?
Why do you think the writer decided to make these changes, and what effect did these changes
have while you were reading?
Can a lack of punctuation have an effect on how something is conveyed to the reader? How
about the lack of indentation?
How did the authors choice of punctuation convey a particular mood?

Promotion:

By utilizing the various forms of punctuation you will be able to control how your audience reads
and interprets your writing.
Many authors and writers are known for their distinct use of punctuation. You could be one of
them someday!
Including punctuation will, not only help your readers understand the text better, but it will also
add depth to your writing.

Reflection:

For the last Mini Lesson, our group struggled with the fact that we were not meeting in person to
present, and we also did most of our planning through the computer. We liked how the subject material is
becoming more natural to us, so we feel like we are having an easier time coming up with relevant topics
to teach. We also think we did better with delegating roles as a group and having everyone know exactly
how they are contributing.

We still struggled with time management and condensing our lesson plan. We tend to finish
teaching early on, so when we do teach again, we can allow groups to have more time working with the
text. Next time, it may also be better to have our supplemental materials printed and ready for students to
use completely separate from the lesson plan. We also realized that we need to do a better job
incorporating the diversity aspect into our lesson. Although we did manage to bring up how language and
grammar changes depending on the setting you are in, we can incorporate it into the strategy of our
lesson plan better. We also want to make sure that we all get practice teaching in front of a group, so we
will make sure to alternate speaking and know exactly what we are going to say before the lesson.