THE WORLD'S BIGGEST WILLY

After Wanderings in Wiltshire (http://diaryofatouristguide.blogspot.co.uk/2016/11/wanderings-in-

wiltshire.html) a title like Dawdling in Dorset would have been appropriate but I thought the above
might be more eye-catching. We were travelling to Bristol from Sussex to see my son and his wife and,
being interested in hill carvings, I planned a stop to see the Cerne Abbas Giant.

A fine example of English manhood

As we were driving along, however, I noticed a sign for Tolpuddle and could not resist a detour. This is
the small Dorset village where in 1834 six agricultural labourers got together to campaign for a better
wage than the nine shillings (less than half a pound) a week they were getting. For this heinous 'crime'
they were transported to Australia but they soon became objects of popular sympathy and compassion.
The British peoples sense of fair play was outraged and the government was forced to pardon and bring
them home, although five of the six ended up in Canada and are buried there.

The Tolpuddle Martyrs Museum

A hundred years later in 1934 a modest museum was opened in their honour and we stopped there and
bought a few souvenirs to help out. (It must be heavily subsidised by the Trade Unions movement.) The
Martyrs were Methodists but there was a funeral taking place at the chapel where they met so we could
not go in. For more on the martyrs go to http://www.tolpuddlemartyrs.org.uk/ from where this image of
them comes:

Another half hour saw us reach the Giant where we clambered about ineffectually in the mud before
finding the layby on the A252 which gave us the best view of this fine specimen of English manhood. I
often mention him and the Wilmington Long Man (coming soon watch this space) particularly when we
pass the Westbury White Horse (http://diaryofatouristguide.blogspot.co.uk/2016/06/a-particularly-
english-art-form.html) and say that he is thought to be a fertility symbol and, shall we say, leaves little to
the imagination with his gigantic penis pointed proudly upwards. No fig leaf for Mister Cerne thats for
sure. It used to be the custom for couples hoping for a child to touch this part of his anatomy but, sadly
and inevitably, the National Trust does not allow us to walk over or near him because of erosion. We
would not want that willy being damaged.

Lots of people think that these hillside carvings are all ancient, even prehistoric, but most were made in
the last few hundred years. No-one knows when Willy, as I shall call him, appeared but there is no
record of him before the late seventeenth century and many think he was an anti-Puritan satirical figure
cut into the ground in the mid-1600s at the time of Oliver Cromwell. The cold sunny days of late
November had given way to a murky early December so the view of Willys member was a little
obscured. You cannot keep a good Englishman down, however, and I managed to get a few shots before
we moved on to Bath for Handels Messiah at the Abbey. Wonderful but that is a story for another
time.

I am at the age now where I am increasingly remembering the fiftieth anniversary of things that
happened when I was young - England winning the World Cup, the Queen coming to the throne (fiftieth
and sixtieth) and recently the Aberfan Disaster. You would have to use the word remembering rather
than celebrating when talking about Aberfan, a little known Welsh village about twenty miles north of
Cardiff that suffered what must still be considered the worst mining disaster ever in Britain.

On 21st October 1966 a huge pile of coal waste collapsed onto the village after a period of heavy and
consistent rainfall. 144 people were suffocated and died as a result, 116 of them schoolchildren who
had just arrived and whose names were being marked in the register. There have been other mining
disasters that have been largely forgotten but what made Aberfan so shocking was that the victims were
mainly schoolchildren. If the slip had occurred in any of the eighteen previous hours or nine subsequent
days (during the half term holiday) the school would have been empty, the children and teachers
spared.

It turned out that there had been plenty of calls to dismantle the tip which had stood above the village
for years but these had been ignored as the National Coal Board was too busy making money to worry
about the dangers. It is fashionable to criticise today's Health and Safety culture but it does stop
disasters like Aberfan happening. Lord Robens, the head of the Coal Board, did offer his resignation after
the tragedy but it turned out later that he knew it would be refused as the government considered him
too important to lose at a time when he was managing the contraction of the coal industry - a
contraction which has continued apace to the extent that there are now no more working coal mines in
Wales.

As a tourist guide you are never sure how to treat tragedy. We are in the happiness business and it is not
done to be too maudlin or to dwell too much on violence. One passenger this year was quite upset to be
taken around Belfast on the taxi drivers' tour in which they do not shirk from sharing the details of just
how violent Belfast was and can still be. This reaction is not uncommon apparently. I tried to drop a hint
that these chaps were 'a bit rough and ready' and that they would be showing people 'the darker side of
Belfast's story' but the hint was not taken.

However, I would always mention places like Aberfan and Locklerbie when passing these areas (see
http://diaryofatouristguide.blogspot.co.uk/2013/12/lockerbie-twenty-five.html) and people often nod in
recognition. I draw the line at stopping for photos, however. Some memories are still too raw - even
after fifty years.

A WALK ON THE WILD SIDE #mybrendanstory

Muckross House

Walking is not a huge feature of coach tours. However, some places have to be seen on foot - Chester,
York, (London)Derry, anywhere with a city wall, in fact - and gardens such as that at Muckross House in
County Kerry. These year Brendan Vacations in Ireland have been adding an optional walk to the Torc
Waterfall and through Muckross Park to the Ring of Kerry drive. I prefer to do it in the afternoon on the
way back to Killarney on the basis that, having sat down for much of the day, people are ready to stretch
their legs for an hour or so.
Torc Waterfall

Lough Leane from Muckross

Last week was my last Ring of Kerry for the year, in fact my last extended tour. I may be getting a bit old
for these tours now and am thinking about concentrating on day trips instead. You need to have a high
energy level and lots of enthusiastic cheerfulness to keep people happy on these tours and I am probably
getting too old and cynical for them now.

However, I love the walk through Muckross and always go along with whoever wants to come. It was a
wet day last Wednesday in Kerry and only half the group did so but we enjoyed the walk with our local
guide Collette and her dog Tas who came along for the exercise. Collette knows all the flowers and
plants, while I can recognise only the obvious ones like rhododendrons - which are not native and have
had to be cut back because they choke all the local ones.

Arthur Vincent and his wife Maud

were given Muckross as a wedding present

The house has been through the hands of several people and families, most recently Arthur Vincent and
Maud Bowers-Bourn, whose father bought it for her for a wedding present. The Bourns made their
money from wine and mineral rights in the Napa Valley, California so they could probably afford it. In
fact, their house there was used in the opening credits of the 80s television series Dynasty with Joan
Collins and Linda Evans fighting it out as the new and discarded wives of an oil baron, all power
shoulders and hairspray, if I remember right. (A Californian passenger told me that.)

Maud died in her forties on the way back to the USA and her widower and father donated the house to
the people of Ireland in her memory once the restoration had been completed. It includes not only the
house itself, but a farm, schoolhouse, Japanese Garden and three lakes which provide the basis for the
Killarney National Park. You can see the Lakes from Ladies View where Queen Victoria stopped with her
ladies in waiting for a picnic on the way around the Ring of Kerry. She spent two nights at Muckross as
the guest of the then owner William Herbert who was hoping for a baronetcy for his hospitality. He
ended up with a bankruptcy instead. Not a lucky house then but a beautiful garden with just the right
combination of wildness and civilisation