Doctor Who Fan Audio Series

Series 1 Episode 4
"Warriors of Valhalla"

By
The-Dan
Revised by:
FutureDirector

Based on:
Doctor Who
(c) BBC
EXT. FOREST
A viking, running through the forest from an unseen evil. He
continues to run as he looks behind him.

VIKING
Keep away from me!
A beast following closely breaths very heavily as it runs on
all fours.

VIKING (CONT’D)
Stay away demon!
The beast charges at the viking. The man screams as
everything goes black for him.

EXT. CLEARING
The TARDIS lands in a clearing. Seconds later The Doctor and
Alicia step out, bickering.

DOCTOR
I’m not going to be held
accountable for your clumsiness.
It’s not my fault.
ALICIA
It is your fault you can’t fly that
thing.
DOCTOR
Of course I can fly it. No one has
ever complained about my flying
skills before...
Alicia rolls her eyes and walks away.
DOCTOR (CONT’D)
...Much
ALICIA
Where are we anyway?
DOCTOR
Norway, around 801 AD. We might see
some Vikings.
Alicia points to something.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 2.

ALICIA
I think we already have.
A dead viking lies before them. He has large wounds all over
his body, with some ribs being exposed. The Doctor examines
the body with his screwdriver.

DOCTOR
I can safely say that indigestion
didn’t kill this chap. He’s been
ripped to shreds.

ALICIA
By what?
Something stars at the two from across the clearing. It’s
the beast, but it’s face is obscured by a helmet and some
fabrics.
DOCTOR
That. I’d wager.
The doctor points towards the beast as it begins to charge
at Alicia. She manages to dive out of the way. The Doctor
throws a rock at the beast’s head. It turns to face the
Doctor, who now has his arms outstretched.
DOCTOR (CONT’D)
C’mon ugly. Over here! Gallifreyan
meat is far better tasting than
Human!
The beast charges now at the Doctor, who points the sonic
screwdriver straight at the beast.

DOCTOR (CONT’D)
I’d cover your ears now, if I were
you.
Alicia covers her ears as the Doctor activates the
screwdriver. It emits an awful screeching sound. Alicia
cringes as she can still hear the ear splitting din through
her covered ears. The Beast lets out a cry of pain and runs
in the opposite direction, into the forest.
DOCTOR (CONT’D)
Good thing I turned it up to
eleven.
Alicia struggles to hear the Doctor.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 3.

ALICIA
What?
DOCTOR
Don’t worry, the deafness will only
be temporary; I’m more interested
in what that was.
ALICIA
I can hear again now. Sort of.

DOCTOR
Good, now mind being quiet while I
think.
ALICIA
Sorry!

DOCTOR
I didn’t get a good look at the
face, but the body looked almost
Neanderthal. But they died out
years ago. Thousands of years ago.

ALICIA
Why was it wearing a Viking helmet?
DOCTOR
Good question. Actually, that is a
really good question.
The bushes around them rustle.
ALICIA
What’s that? Is it back?

DOCTOR
I doubt it. It’ll associate me with
pain. Most things do in the end. It
won’t want to come near me anymore.

ALICIA
But I definitely heard something.
DOCTOR
It will most likely be...

The Doctor gets cut off by Vikings storming out from the
bushes. Gregor marches towards the Doctor and Alicia,
pointing his sword at the Doctor’s neck.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 4.

DOCTOR (CONT’D)
... the locals.
GREGOR
Who are you, outsider?

DOCTOR
Good question.
Another viking Sjkelian sees the body and kneels beside it.

SJKELIAN
It’s Arne, sir.
GREGOR
Arne? You did this outsider!

DOCTOR
(Scoffing)
I doubt it, look, he’s been
dismembered.
SJKELIAN
It could have been the beast, sir.
GREGOR
Oh for the last time, Sjkelian.
There is no beast. Just some hocus
pocus made up by the womenfolk to
scare the men. I go back to my
question. Who are you, outsider?
DOCTOR
Isn’t obvious? I am Thor.

Alicia slaps her hand to her face. There is bemused silence

from the crowd, which turns into rowdy laughter.
GREGOR
(laughing slows down)
You have obviously heard of our
visitor, and now you are trying to
pass yourself off as a God. Very
amusing, outsider.
DOCTOR
Want me to prove it? Stand back.
The Doctor with his sonic screwdriver up his sleeve, summons
lightning. The rest of the vikings gasp in awe and bow their
heads, except for Gregor.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 5.

SJKELIAN
He is Thor!
GREGOR
Where’s your hammer then, "Thor?"

The Doctor rummages through his pockets and pulls out a

toffee hammer.
DOCTOR
Here it is. Little small, I accept,
but that’s what I get for buying
cheap.
Gregor points to Alicia.
GREGOR
So who is this, then?
The Doctor thinks quickly. All eyes staring at him.
DOCTOR
My wench.

ALICIA
Excuse me?!
DOCTOR
(Quietly)
Quiet now, Alicia. I’ll explain
later.
SJKELIAN
Are you here to see Loki?

DOCTOR
I suppose so, where is the old
blighter?
SJKELIAN
Back at the village. I can’t
believe we are visited by two gods
in a single moon.
ALICIA
Where is the village?

GREGOR
Come... I shall show you.
The vikings walk away, as the Doctor and Alicia follow. She
turns to the Doctor.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 6.

ALICIA
Your wench?
DOCTOR
It was either that or consort.

ALICIA
I would have preferred consort!
DOCTOR
You see, it’s reasons like this why
I struggle to understand humanity
sometimes. Back on Gallifrey, wench
was a term of endearment.

EXT. VILLAGE

The groups eventually arrives at the village. Gregor and his

vikings approach a young blond lady, looking sad.
GREGOR
Greetings, Heidi my dear, have you
considered my proposal?
Heidi ignores Gregor, sounding concerned.
HEIDI
Any sign of Pallidin?

SJKELIAN
None, I’m afraid. Heidi, we may
have to face up to the idea that
he’s dead.

HEIDI
With no body.
SJKELIAN
Strange things happen, Heidi. Look
at this.
Sjkelian gestures to the Doctor.
SJKELIAN (CONT’D)
This is Thor. The second God we’ve
come across in a single moon.
Heidi looks quizzical as Gregor butts in.
GREGOR
My proposal, Heidi?

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 7.

HEIDI
I have no answer for you yet, I’m
afraid.

GREGOR
(Annoyed)
Very well. Thor, I will inform Loki
of your arrival.

DOCTOR
Oh, you don’t have to call me Thor
all of the time. I prefer Doctor
actually.
Everyone looks at him, puzzled.

DOCTOR (CONT’D)
It’s a nickname I picked up on
Asgard.
Gregor walks off into a large hut. Heidi turns to the
Doctor.
HEIDI
Forgive me, Tho-Doctor, but you do
not look as we imagined.

DOCTOR
Oh, I look different in the Mortal
realm. Beards aren’t itchy in
Asgard, y’see.

Heidi looks at Alicia.

HEIDI
And, who are you, may I ask?
DOCTOR
Oh she’s...
ALICIA
(Interrupting)
HIS FRIEND. I’m his friend.

HEIDI
I was not award gods had friends.
The Doctor opens his mouth to speak, but Alicia is too quick
for him.

ALICIA
They do as it turns out.
Gregor emerges from the hut.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 8.

GREGOR
He’s ready for you, Doctor.

The Doctor turns to Alicia.

DOCTOR
Fancy meeting Loki?
ALICIA
Can’t be more disappointing than
meeting Sir Francis Drake. What a
bore.
DOCTOR
Hey, Drakey and I go way back.

The two continue to bicker as they enter the hut.

INT. VILLAGE - HUT

The Doctor and Alicia enter a darkened room, lit only by

torches. At the end of the room is a dark figure, sitting on
a throne-like chair. The figure is unusually tall and thin,
very out of proportion. It is wearing a long flowing hooded
cloak. Its hands are black and skeletal. Its face is hidden
behind a gray metal mask, with large circular eyes and a
broad grin. The features of the mask appear to be glowing
slightly. Loki, as the figure is named, rises from his seat.
DOCTOR
Loki, I presume. Of course, I’m
also going to presume you go by
multiple other names too.
Loki speaks in a high mocking tone.
LOKI
As do you... Doctor. A long way
from the lost planet of Gallifrey
now, with your TARDIS the last
remnants of Time Lord technology.
DOCTOR
Face value knowledge of me.
He turns quickly to Alicia.
DOCTOR (CONT’D)
Well done, you’ve read her mind.
Must also be how you adopted the
Loki identity. So who are you
really?

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 9.

LOKI
I’m enjoying this persona actually.
I like being "Loki."
DOCTOR
What’s behind that mask, hmm?
LOKI
(Teasingly)
What isn’t behind it?

DOCTOR
That’s not an answer. An answer
would be; "Porridge" or "A face."
What you just did was evasion,
wasn’t it?

LOKI
Was it?
DOCTOR
(Losing his temper)
Stop answering my questions with
questions!
LOKI
Then stop asking stupid questions.
DOCTOR
That Neanderthal thing lurking
around here. Has it anything to do
with you?
LOKI
There’s a good question. And the
answer is yes.
DOCTOR
Then what?

LOKI
Not telling.
DOCTOR
(Annoyed)
What?

LOKI
Where’s the fun in telling you?
DOCTOR
I’m getting nothing from you, am I?

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 10.

LOKI
No.

DOCTOR
Then I guess, it’s going to happen
the hard way.
LOKI
What is?

DOCTOR
Your defeat.
LOKI
And why do you believe you can
defeat me?
DOCTOR
Because I’m the Doctor.
The Doctor grabs Alicia and marches out of the hut. Loki is
left tilting his head slightly, intrigued by this new
visitor.

EXT. VILLAGE - CENTER

Outside, the Doctor turns to Alicia.

DOCTOR
Are you alright? You didn’t say a
word in there.

ALICIA
Don’t mind me, my head was just
hurting.
DOCTOR
Again?
ALICIA
I get headaches, what of it?
DOCTOR
Most people don’t zone out while
they’re having them though.
Alicia looks down and shuffles a bit.
DOCTOR
Look, just sit over there.
The Doctor points to a barrel.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 11.

DOCTOR (CONT’D)
I’ll go talk to Sjkelian about this
whole "beast" business.
ALICIA
’suppose.

EXT. VILLAGE
Alicia wanders over to the side of the hut and sits on the
barrrel. The Doctor approaches Sjkelian and Heidi.
SJKELIAN
Ah, Doctor. I was wondering; what
is that thing around your neck?

DOCTOR
Oh this? It’s a bow tie. Bow ties
are cool. Spread the word.
SJKELIAN & HEIDI
Bow ties are cool.

DOCTOR
Now you’re getting it. Now, what do
you know of "The Beast?"

EXT. VILLAGE - BESIDE LOKI’S HUT

Alicia continues to sit on the barrel, watching the Doctor
across the village. She rubs her head as Loki comes up
beside her.

LOKI
It’s more than just a headache,
isn’t it?
Alicia jumps in surprise at Loki’s presence.

ALICIA
I have no idea what you are talking
about.
LOKI
Why do you travel with him?
ALICIA
I don’t really know.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 12.

LOKI
When you realize the answer, it
will change your life forever.
Alicia pauses.

ALICIA
How do you know all this?
She turns to Loki but he has disappeared. She looks around
scared and worried, before getting up and heading to the
Doctor.

EXT. VILLAGE - CENTER

She arrives to him as he’s in mid conversation.

DOCTOR
... A cave?
ALICIA
A what now?

DOCTOR
Feeling better?
ALICIA
(Dismissively)
Yeah, fine. What about a cave?
SJKELIAN
The beast appears to live in a cave
to the west of here. All the
attacks are in the proximity of it.

DOCTOR
When was the first attack?
HEIDI
It was...
Heidi stops short of sobbing.
SJKELIAN
It appears to be a week ago, just
before Loki’s arrival. Heidi’s
husband, Pallidin went missing in
the cave. We sent out a search
party and that’s when we met Loki.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 13.

DOCTOR
So you think the beast is linked to
Loki in some way?
SJKELIAN
There’s more. Six warriors have
been killed since Pallidin
disappeared, but we have found
their bodies, we never found
Pallidin’s.

HEIDI
(Hopeful)
So he may be still alive.
SJKELIAN
I wouldn’t hold out much hope.

DOCTOR
Why do you say that?
SJKELIAN
I believe the reason we haven’t
found a body is because it is still
in the cave.
DOCTOR
Show me the cave.

SJKELIAN
What?
DOCTOR
Lead me to it.

HEIDI
You’ll be killed!
DOCTOR
I’m a god...

The Doctor notices something happening far beyond Sjkelian.

DOCTOR (CONT’D)
I’ll... be... fine.

Alicia notices it too. Beyond Sjkelian, Gregor and Loki are

conversing, every now and then looking at the group.
ALICIA
Loki and Gregor seem to be awfully
close, don’t you think?

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 14.

DOCTOR
Too close for my liking. I think
I’m starting to put 2 and 2
together, and I don’t like the
results.

EXT. CAVE ENTRANCE

The Doctor, Alicia, Sjkelian and Heidi arrive at the cave.
The Doctor approaches the cave as the rest stay back.

DOCTOR
What’s wrong now?
SJKELIAN
I don’t know, but I’m getting an
awful feeling from this place.
DOCTOR
You too Alicia?
ALICIA
It’s sort of like how I felt when
my father died. It makes me feel
empty.
The Doctor runs the sonic screwdriver up one of the walls,
and looks at the readings.

DOCTOR
There’s a mood filter around this
whole cave.
ALICIA
What’s a mood filter?
DOCTOR
Essentially, it’s a perception
filter that shifts your mood rather
than your perception.
ALICIA
Why isn’t it working on you?
DOCTOR
Mood filters are extremely rare and
tricky to program. And even when
they are programmed right, their
range is limited. This one only
works on humans.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 15.

SJKELIAN
What should we do?
DOCTOR
Fight that bad feeling. Brace
yourself and enter. It won’t be as
bad, nearer the middle of the cave.
It’s really just to stop passerby
from entering.
Skjelian and Alicia both wince and enter the cave warily.
Heidi stays put, prompting the Doctor to approach her.
DOCTOR
I know this is hard for you, but
the only way we can know for sure
about Pallidin is if we enter that
cave.
The Doctor grabs her hand and smiles.
DOCTOR (CONT’D)
You’ll be safe with me, I’m the
Doctor.
The two gingerly enter the cave.

INT. CAVE

They arrive at the waiting Sjkelian and Alicia. Sjkelian is

holding an unlit torch. The Doctor points his screwdriver at
it and it lights up.
DOCTOR
Onward into the breach.
The Doctor leads the group further into the cave. After a
bit of walking, the group comes across a figure, lying on
the ground. It is the same figure that earlier attacked the
Doctor and Alicia. The Doctor walks up to it, quietly.
ALICIA
What is it doing?
DOCTOR
Sleeping.
The Doctor crouches beside it, removing the helmet from its
head. He throws it to Sjkelian.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 16.

DOCTOR
Recognize that?
SJKELIAN
It’s one of our helmets.

HEIDI
Pallidin’s, look at the inscription
on the inside.
An assortment of viking characters are engraved on the
inside of the helmet.
HEIDI
How did this thing get the helmet?
DOCTOR
I have an idea. I just hope I’m
wrong.
The Doctor scans the beast with his screwdriver.
DOCTOR
Impossible.
ALICIA
What?
DOCTOR
This appears to be a devolved
human. But that’s impossible.
SJKELIAN
A what human?

ALICIA
Doctor, that helmet looked pretty
tight on the things head. You don’t
think...

DOCTOR
Unfortunately, I always think.
SJKELIAN
Sorry for being slow, but are
either of you going to explain what
is going on here?
DOCTOR
his is, or used to be Pallidin.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 17.

HEIDI
No!
SJKELIAN
(Angered)
Loki! I bet it was Loki. This is
exactly what he would do, the
devious fiend!
HEIDI
(Crying)
Doctor! Can you do anything for
him?
DOCTOR
I can’t. I’ve never seen anything
like this before. Full-scale
devoultion. My species had nowhere
near this power.
ALICIA
Then what do we do?

DOCTOR
We have no choice.
HEIDI
No.

ALICIA
We can’t.
DOCTOR
We have to kill it.

HEIDI
You can’t kill it! It’s my husband!
DOCTOR
Heidi. This is important. Look at
me. That thing is not your husband.
Your husband is dead. He was killed
by Loki. I’m sorry, but we have to
kill this before it kills again.

Two figures emerge from the shadows. It’s Gregor and Loki.
LOKI
How very noble.
SJKELIAN
You! Gregor! What are you doing
with... it?!

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 18.

GREGOR
It, as you bluntly call him, is
your god. You will treat him with
the respect he deserves.
SJKELIAN
He’s no god of mine!
DOCTOR
Loki, just tell me this. Why?
Loki shrugs.
LOKI
Fun.

Heidi wails more, as Alicia goes over to comfort her.

ALICIA
Fun? People have died, lives have
been destroyed.

LOKI
Like I said; Fun.
DOCTOR
So you picked this place at random?
This victim at random?
LOKI
Oh, no. Gregor, helped me
immensely.

The group turns to Gregor. Sjkelian draws his sword.

SJKELIAN
Gregor!

GREGOR
My lord, you said this was a
secret!
LOKI
I lie. Big surprise.

DOCTOR
What are you?
LOKI
That, Doctor, is a question for
another day.
Loki appears to dissolve in midair, leaving the rest alone.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 19.

GREGOR
Wait!
Sjkelian rounds on Gregor.
SJKELIAN
Why? Why pallidin?
GREGOR
(Shouting)
He did not deserve Heidi! One so
soft and timid was not meant for
one so beautiful.
SJKELIAN
One so cowardly and pathetic is not
meant for life.

Sjkelian points his sword to Gregor’s neck, who also draws

his.
GREGOR
Heidi. My proposal?

HEIDI
I would never marry you!
GREGOR
Then you do not deserve life.

Gregor charges at Heidi, but is blocked by Sjkelian. The two

engage in a fight, as the Beast wakes up. It lets out an
almighty roar.
DOCTOR
You’ve gone and woke him up now!
And he doesn’t half look cranky.
Run!
The group runs out except for Gregor and Shjelian, who
continues to fight. The Beast ignores them and runs after
the Doctor, Heidi and Alicia.

EXT. CAVE ENTRANCE

The three emerge from the cave.

DOCTOR
Okay ladies, you run away. I’ll
stop it.

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 20.

ALICIA
What are you gonna do?
DOCTOR
Don’t know. I hope it’s good.

ALICIA
Isn’t it still scared of you?
DOCTOR
I was lying earlier. Sorry about
that.
ALICIA
Why were you lying?
DOCTOR
Does it matter?! Just go!
Alicia takes Heidi back to the village. The beast comes
thundering out of the cave. Quickly, the Doctor removes his
jacket and throws it over the beast’s head.

DOCTOR
Okay, that plan would have been a
bit better if I’d taken out my
screwdriver. Okay bare bones.
He removes his braces and starts thwacking the beast with
them. The beast starts to growl angrily.
DOCTOR
Just annoying it. Damn, I’m running
out of things to remove.

He then takes off one of his shoes. Before he can throw it,
however, Sjkelian races out of the cave and leaps onto the
beast’s back.
SJKELIAN
For Pallidin!
Sjkellian stabs the beast in the back. It lets out a great
cry before collapsing dead.
DOCTOR
(Tired)
Well, that was remarkably easy to
kill. How come your lot had such
trouble with it?

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 21.

SJKELIAN
I doubt any of us managed to get on
its back.
DOCTOR
So where is Gregor?
SJKELIAN
In the cave. Dead.
DOCTOR
Can’t say I approve. Though can’t
say I condemn either. I suppose
you’re the new tribe leader.
SJKELIAN
Who me? No, I’m no good.

DOCTOR
Oh Sjkelian, you’re the best viking
I’ve ever met. Granted I’ve only
met around five, but it’s a good
five.

Sjkelian smiles. The Doctor places his hand around his

shoulders as the two return to the village.

EXT. VILLAGE

They arrive just as Alicia and Heidi run up to them.

ALICIA
Are you okay?

DOCTOR
What’s the matter, starting to care
about me?
ALICIA
Well... no. It’s just you’re the
only one who can fly the TARDIS.
DOCTOR
Not necessarily, we better go.

SJKELIAN
One more thing Doctor.
DOCTOR
Yes?

(CONTINUED)
CONTINUED: 22.

SJKELIAN
You’re not really a god, are you?
DOCTOR
Aha, a clever one. How’d you figure
me out?

SJKELIAN
You’re far wiser and more powerful
than any god I’ve ever heard of.

DOCTOR
Thank you. Just don’t start
worshiping me. It gets weird.
Sjkelian gives the Doctor a viking salute, which the Doctor
mimics. Alicia waves goodbye.

DOCTOR
Till next time. So long.
The Doctor and Alicia walk out of the village back to the
Tardis.

INT. TARDIS
Inside, the Doctor walks straight to the console and pulls a
lever. The TARDIS churns to life.

ALICIA
One thing I still don’t get.
DOCTOR
Hmm?

ALICIA
Who was Loki? He told me when I
realize why I travel with you, It’d
change my life.

DOCTOR
I don’t know. And if there is one
thing I don’t like, it’s not
knowing. But I get the feeling,
we’ll get to find out soon. Very
soon.
 23.

END