Navy Seal Copypasta and variants

Original:
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? Ill have you
know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and Ive been involved in
numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am
trained in gorilla warfare and Im the top sniper in the entire US armed forces.
You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with
precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my
fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the
Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of
spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare
for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call
your life. Youre fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you
in over seven hundred ways, and thats just with my bare hands. Not only am I
extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of
the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your
miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could
have known what unholy retribution your little clever comment was about to bring
down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldnt, you
didnt, and now youre paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all
over you and you will drown in it. Youre fucking dead, kiddo.

Pirate:
What in Davy Jones locker did ye just bark at me, ye scurvy bilgerat? Ill have ye
know I be the meanest cutthroat on the seven seas, and Ive led numerous raids on
fishing villages, and raped over 300 wenches. I be trained in hit-and-run pillaging
and be the deadliest with a pistol of all the captains on the high seas. Ye be
nothing to me but another source o swag. Ill have yer guts for garters and keel
haul ye like never been done before, hear me true. You think ye can hide behind
your newfangled computing device? Think twice on that, scallywag. As we parley I be
contacting my secret network o pirates across the sea and yer port is being
tracked right now so ye better prepare for the typhoon, weevil. The kind o monsoon
thatll wipe ye off the map. Youre sharkbait, fool. I can sail anywhere, in any
waters, and can kill ye in oer seven hundred ways, and that be just with me hook
and fist. Not only do I be top o the line with a cutlass, but I have an entire
pirate fleet at my beck and call and Ill damned sure use it all to wipe yer arse
off o the world, ye dog. If only ye had had the foresight to know what devilish
wrath your jibe was about to incur, ye might have belayed the comment. But ye
couldnt, ye didnt, and now yell pay the ultimate toll, you buffoon. Ill shit
fury all over ye and yell drown in the depths o it. Youre fish food now.

Desu:
What the desu did you just fucking desu about me, you little desu? Ill have you
know I graduated top of my desu in the Navy Desus, and Ive been involved in
numerous secret desus on Al-Desu, and I have over 300 confirmed desus. I am trained
in desu warfare and Im the top desu in the entire US armed desu. You are nothing
to me but just another desu. I will desu you the fuck out with desu the likes of
which has never been seen before on this desu, mark my fucking desu. You think you
can get away with saying that desu to me over the desu? Think again, desu. As we
speak I am contacting my secret network of desu across the USA and your desu is
being traced right now so you better prepare for the spam, maggot. The spam that
wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your desu. Youre fucking desu, kid. I
can be desu, desu, and I can desu you in over desu ways, and thats just with my
bare desu. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed desu, but I have access to
the entire arsenal of the United States Desu and I will use it to its full extent
to wipe your miserable desu off the face of the desu, you little desu. If only you
could have known what unholy desu your little desu comment was about to bring
down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking desu. But you desu, you desu,
and now youre desu, you goddamn desu. I will shit desu all over you and you will
drown in it. Youre fucking desu, kiddo

Death Note:
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little shit? Ill have you
know I graduated top of Japan and Im responsible for heart attacks of criminals
world wide, and I have 124,925 confirmed kills. I trained myself to be the best in
a battle of wits and Im the god of this new world. You are nothing to me but just
another name. I will wipe you the fuck out in a method that you cant even
comprehend, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit
to me over the internet? Think again fucker. As we speak I am contacting all my
followers and your personal file is being brought to my location right now so you
better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little
thing you call your life. Youre fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime and
kill you in over 2 million differant ways, and thats just with my notebook. Not
only am I extensively trained in finding out your name, but I have access to the
entire arsenal of over 30 thousand world wild followers and I will use them to
their full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of this continent, you
little shit. If only you could have known what holy retribution your little
clever statement was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would of held you
fucking tounge. But you couldnt, you didnt, and now youre paying the price, you
god damn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. Youre
fucking dead, kiddo.

World of Warcraft:
What the fuck did you just fucking say about my gear, you little n00b? Ill have
you know I am a lvl 90 Undead Arcane Mage, and Ive won so many PVP matches, and I
have done raids on every 10 man heroic dungeon. I also have a fuckton of macros and
I have a GS of 10K. You are nothing to me but just a lvl 12 gnome hunter. I will
pwn the fuck out of you with Arcane Missiles the likes of which has never been seen
before on Azeroth AND Outland, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away
with saying that shit to me over raid? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am
contacting my guild of mages and shamans across The Eastern Kingdoms and your
character is being targeted right now so you better prepare for the ownage, n00b.
The Arcane Barrage that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your
character. Youre fucking pwnd, n00b. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill
you in over seven hundred ways, and thats just with my secondary talent tree. Not
only am I extensively trained in Arcane magic, but I have access to the entire
arsenal of Fire magic and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable
neckbeard off the face of Azeroth, you little faggot. If only you could have known
what unholy retribution your little clever comment was about to bring down upon
you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldnt, you didnt,
and now youre getting debuffed, you goddamnn00b. I will shit Dragons Breath all
over you and you will burn in it. Youre fucking pwnd, faggot.

IT expert:
What the fuck did you just fucking type about me, you little bitch? Ill have you
know I graduated top of my class at MIT, and Ive been involved in numerous secret
raids with Anonymous, and I have over 300 confirmed DDoSes. I am trained in online
trolling and Im the top hacker in the entire world. You are nothing to me but just
another virus host. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which
has never been seen before on the Internet, mark my fucking words. You think you
can get away with typing that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As
we chat over IRC I am tracing your IP with my damn bare hands so you better prepare
for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call
your computer. Youre fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can hack
into your files in over seven hundred ways, and thats just with my bare hands. Not
only am I extensively trained in hacking, but I have access to the entire arsenal
of every piece of malware ever created and I will use it to its full extent to wipe
your miserable ass off the face of the world wide web, you little shit. If only you
could have known what unholy retribution your little clever comment was about to
bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking fingers. But you
couldnt, you didnt, and now youre paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will
shit code all over you and you will drown in it. Youre fucking dead, kiddo.