Ten Short Stories EDUCATIONAL EDITION WITH INTRODUCTION, EXTENSIVE EXERCISES AND GLOSSARIES Roald DahlTa - ~ a : rencuw a00Ks : CONTENTS Publhad by the Penguin Group Penguin Books Lid, 27 Wrights Lane, London W8 STZ, England , Penguin Baste USA Inc. 375 Hudson Sect, New York, New York 1016, USA Penguin Boole Ausali id Ringed Vicor, Ausra engn Sha Cane, Arn Avene, Tern, Ota Canada MAY 382 Teun ch a nn Hv, Ai New Zari) Penguin Boks Ud, Registered Othe: Harmondsworth, Mise, Eaglnd es Reg bog Roald Dahl: Life and Times 1 Yablined by Penn Hooks 1956 98 TES The Umbrella Man 5 “The Umbrella Man’, ‘Mr Botibor and “The Butler’ were first published in Dip in the Pool n BeBe no by Michal Joep ia More Tals of The Butler 2 intr copy © Koad Doh 1971950 The Hitchhiker 3 “Teter shat tors in hs book ave ae fom The Clit! Short | Mr Botibol 36 nr fn tig Peco cymm O Fty Ea on en | My Lady Love, My Dove 54 igi owe ‘The Way up to Heaven o “The moral right of the suthor has ban ater | Parson's Pleasure 9 . | ‘The Sound Machine 100 Sin 10/1 Spt Mono latino The Wish * Notes ns cep inthe United Sie of Ameri, thi bok Sold st to thesndi that sal es by ay of ade or eer, Be ‘Real red uv or heise else thou te pabihe’s Foor consent an any form of besing or ever er than that -wblch i'r pls ond wiht 9 sine conaiton iets ts ondtom beng mapossd on he susoquent pursusersang no ROALD DAHL: LIFE AND TIMES Roald Dah! was born in 1916 in Llandaff, a small town just ‘outside Cardiff, the capital city of Wales. Roald’s parents were Norwegian, the family having originally moved from Norway to Wales in the 1880s. His name is a Norwegian name and his first name Roald is pronounced ‘Roo-ahl’ with a silent final ‘a’ Roald’s father, Harald, worked in the shipping industry and the family were prosperous, living a in a large house in the Glamorgan countryside. Roald’s mother, Sophie, w=s FHarald’s second wife and Roald was her only son. Roald was only four years old at the time of his father's deatiy and when Roald’ father died, Roald felt as if he became an only child, ‘even though he had sisters and step-brothers and sisters. Many of his stories have children as the heroes or heroines or a main point of view for the story and they are nearly always alone, without brothers and sisters to whom they can talk and in whom they can confide. Roald Dahil led a rather lonely life as a child. He writes in some detail about growing up and about his childhood in South Wales in his autobiography Boy which was published in 1984, His schooldays unbil his eighteenth year were spent at a boy's public school, Repton, in Derbyshire. According ic ‘many accounts Dahi's schooldays were not always happy and hhe was subjected to much teasing and bullying by other boys on account of his strange name, and his height. Roald Dab ‘was six foot six inches tall. Many of his stories, especially stories for children, explore the theme of bullies and bullying, ‘After leaving school Dahl travelled extensively and in 1934 joined the snulti-nationa) oil company Shell. He worked hott in London and in East Africa, On the outbreak of war he joined the Royal Air Force and was based in Nairobi, Kenya, eventually joining a fighter squadron in Libya in Noth Africa It was while flying with this squadron, during which time heI 1 2 ” ‘Ten Short Stori fought as a pilot in Syria and Greece, that he was severely ‘wounded. In 1942 he went to Washington where he worked in the Embassy, He was subsequently transferred to Intelligence ‘work. It was in Washington that he began to write his first short stories. Roald DahI's short stories have been bestocllers all over the ‘world and have been translated into many languages. The books in which they are collected are Someone Like You, Kiss Kiss, Switch Bitch, Twenty-nine Kisses from Roald Dahl, Over To You, and Ah! Sweet Mystery of Life. Several stories have also been collected under more general headings such as Tales of the Unexpected and More Tales of the Unexpected. Several stories of the ‘unexpected’ were dramatized for television and have ‘made his writings even more popular throughout the world. ‘The use of the word “unexpected” in relation to many of Roald Daht's short stories is quite common. The endings to his stories are often unexpected and take the reader by surprise. Sometimes the endings are comic, sometimes they are tragic, sometimes a likeable character wins, sometimes an evil and disliked character wins; in most cases, however, the ending is almost impossible to predict and there is a ‘twistin-the-tale’ Many of the stories are humorous as characters, find them= selves in unusval or extreme situations but the humour is nearly always a ‘black’ humour because comic and tragic elements mix together Black humour is an important element in Roald Dahl's writ- ings. Dahl seems to enjoy treating some of his characters in a ceruel way. The characters find themselves in circumstances ‘which they did not expect or which have tragic consequences bbut their situation i often described in an arousing way and readers find that they are laughing at the personal tragedies ‘of the character and that they may even enjoy reading about their misfortunes, Black humour is directed at characters who ‘are shown to be unsympathetic but is also sometimes reserved for characters we have grown to like. The starting point for many of the stories is often everyday, common incidents of ‘ordinary life and the characters are often neople :sith ‘hon: readers can identify. Not one of Roald Dait'» stories cod be called sentimental Roald Dahl frst met his first wife Patricia in London in 1951. Patricia Neal was an American and was by then already Roald Dahl: Life and Times 3 ‘established as a successful stage and film actress and Dahl was. rot yet recognized as a successful writer, though at that time he was working almost full-time as a writer. They married in New York in July, 1953. In the autumn of 1953 the collection of stories Someone Like You was published by the American publisher Alfred Knopf, who was to be Dahl's main publisher End supporter throughout his life, and a year later the book ‘was published in Britain by Secker and Warburg. Roald and Patricia Dahl had four children. They divorced in 1983 and Dahi remarried Felicity Crosiand, Roald Dahl's other main publications include a highly praised novel My Uncle Oswald and a sequence of books for Enildren which have made him one of the most famous writers, ff children’s books in the world. His books for children include James and the Giant Peach, Charlie and the Chocolate Factory, The ‘Magic Finger, Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator, Fantnstic Mr Fox, The Twits, The Witches, The BFG (the initials stand for ‘big, friendly giant) and Matilda. The Witches was the 1983 winner ‘of the Whitbread Award. Many people believe that these chil- dren's stories will be the classies of the future. In Britain alone, between 1980 and 1996, aver eleven million of his books were sold in paperback form. The figure is considerably more than the total number of children born in Britain in these years. These books for children helped considerably to make Roald Dahl a multi-millionaire, Several of Dahl's books have been made into films. Danny (from Danny, Champion of the World) and The Witches were made into films in the 1980s, Roald Dahl himself was interestect in the writing of film scripts and was involved in the writing of the internationally successfui film Chitty Ciutty Bang Bang He also worked to adapt Chiarhe and the Chocolate Factory for the seveen and in 1971 it was released as the film Willy Wonkn tnd the Chocolate Factory Roald Dahi died in November 1990. He is buried in Great Missenden in Berkshire which had been his main family home for most uf his adult life. He is one of the most widely read ivontiat writers of the past fifty years‘Time-Line: The Life and Times of Roald Dahl 1914-18 1922 1933 1939-45 1954 1963, 1964-70 1969 17 1979 1989 Ten Short Stories 5 First World War. James Joye, Ulysses and T.S. Elio The Waste Land. | ‘Adolf hile comes to power in Germany Second World War. Wiliam Golding, Lord of the Fis. ‘The assassination of President Kennedy shocks the Western World London becomes the worldwide capital of youth Caltare~ espeially music, clothes ané design U8 astronauts land on the moon Britain joins the EEC (European Economic Com- munity). Margaret Thatcher begins an eleven-year term as British Prime Minster Gold War between America/the West and the Soviet Unicn/Eastem Europe comes to an ond Capitalism begins to extend eastwards THE UMBRELLA MAN. IM GOING TO TELL YOU about 2 funny thing that happened to ry mother and me yesterday evening, | am twelve years old and {'m a igel My mother is thiety four but Lar nearly as tall as her already. ‘Yesterday afternoon, my mother took me up to London to see the dentist. He found one hole. It was in a back tooth and he filled it without iucting me too much, After that, we went to a café I had a tanana split and my mother had a cup of coffe. By the time we got up to leave it was about six o'clock ‘When we came out ofthe café it had started to rain, We must get» taxi my mother said. We were wearing ordinary hats and coats, and it wat ening quite hard “Why dont we go back into the café and vest for i to stop I said | wanted another of those banana splits. They were gorgeous. ‘ant going to stop,’ my mother sid. We must get home’ We stood on the pavement in the rain. looking for 2 taxi. Lots of them came by but they all had passengers inside ther. wish we had acarwith a chauffeur’ my mother said Just then a man came up to us. He was a small man and he was pretty old, probably seventy or moce. He raised his hat politely and Said to my mother, Excuse me, I do hope you will excuse me ../ He bad a fine white moustache and bushy white eyebrows and a wrinkly pink face. He as sheltering under an umbrella ovhich he held high ‘over hi head "Yee! my mother said, very cool and distant. 1 wonder if | could ask a small favour of you. he said. Te i only 3 very small favour: T'saw my mother iooking at him suspiciously. She is a suspicious person. my mother. She is especially suspicious of two things = strange men ané boiled eggs. Wheo she cuts the top off a boiled egy. she pokes around inside it sath her spoon as though expecting to fal 2 mouse or something. With strange mes, she has a golden rule which says, The nicer the man seems to be, the more suspicious you must tecome’ This tle old man was particularly nice. He was polite. He 66 7 6 ‘Ten Short Stories was walipoken He was welldressed. He was areal gentleman. The {plc ee wavs a bees fi oon on aye spt a gellnan by the shors he wears” was trthe of my ‘mother's favourite sayings. This man had beaiitiful brown shoes. “The rath of the mater ix” the litle man wes saying Tve got nye into ait ofa sxe. need eme bp Not much Ture yo IRs amos nothing in fac. but | do ned i. You see. adam old People like me often become terribly forgetful...” My mothe’ chin wasup and se ws staig down at him along the fl gt of her nove. twas eanome thing, ts sty nate stare of ay mothers Most people goto pice campeely when she vei to them I once saw my on heaisess begin fo sare tad snpe lean dat when my mater gave ea elf sty. ‘oe But the kite man on the paverent withthe unbrela over is head didn't bat an eyelid He gave agente se and nd, Teg You to bebeve madam that Iam notin the hai of stoping lade i he Stet ad ling them my robles" Tate ay mera it quite embarrassed by my mother's sharpness. I wanted to say tober. Oh many, for heavers sake, he's avery very ld am, end he's eet and polit and hes in some sort of trouble so dot be 20 ely to hin’ But | st sy anything The ite man shied his nbrel fl one hand tothe other. Tve never forgotten before he ud “Youve never orgten what” my mother asked tery ‘My walt he sd Tet ave let tn my be ace. tat the slt thing to dor "Ae yourahing met give you money? my mothe sid 4g Qh fro eco eo he ed Hee obi shad eve “Then what are you asking my mother sid ‘Do hury up We'e getting soaked to the skin here, ‘are {low you ab And hal why tm leg youths umbrella fine o protect you and tokep forever en ‘only what? my mother said. ‘er * “only you would give me in return a pound for my taxes tone me home” My mother was stl supkious. you had no mene in the fet Plsce’ sess, then how det you gl bee “wate” he answered. Every dey Igo fra lovey long walk and ‘hen summon a ao take me home. Goi every day ofthe yar” ‘The Umbrella Man 7 ‘Why don’t you walk home nowT my mother asked. “On woh I cod he sid1 do wish could. Bat 1 dont ik F ould mange ion thse ily old lege of mine, Tve gone too far a- ready.” ‘iy mote stood there cheng her lower lip. She was begining tones BT eould see that nthe idea of geting an ure to Spaterunder mast have tempted hea good dea "ro lovey unre’ the ile man id Solve ied ny mother said, Teste esa tan seta “Then why dont you tke it; madam’ he suid, cost me over twenty pues | promise you Bt that's of no importance slong es Cinpet home ad es thst od leg of mine Samy mother's and fekng forthe asp of ber pure. She sw | pe watcng her Iwas giving heron of my co Rosy ned looks | hele and she Amen exaciy wht 1 was teling he, Now liste, | fhanmy tes teing her you spy ms ake vantage of fred | ERTS ost rotor fing to do. My malin pated nd (tated beck st me Then she sad tothe ile man 1 dont thick fs | igte right that I should take an umbrella fom you worth twenty fence tink 1a beter js pr you the tan ae and be done ith i | esos ie to he atin a am ef | Set nel ene foe that Take the nbc des dy. ane keep the ran off your shoul dese Ty miter gave me a hiumphant sideways look Tere you ae she wasteling me. Youre wrong He wos eto have She fhe no ur pe and tock ou a pound noe She held st |. totelieman He tok and handed he the unbreli,He pocketed the pound re his hat gave aquih bow om the at tnd $0 | Metie ner her and keep dry. daring” mother sid “Art *—welinky Tvenever ads sik tne before fou’ afer i ‘vhy were youso ord to hmin he begining? asked Tinted 1 oify mysel he wasnt a tester” she sid “And aarti was» gener Fn very flee |e abe to hep him “Yes mary ‘Ava gare she went on, ‘Westy, to. otherwise be soldat hte had nik umbrella shoul’ be suprised if he "ied paso Si Hay Goldsworthy osometang e hat _ -15 8 Ten Short Stories ‘es, mummy “This will bea good lesson to you. she went on. ‘Never rush things. Always take your Hime when you are summing someone up. Then youll never make mistakes’ “There he goes’ Isaid. Look ‘Where? ‘Over there. He's crossing the street. Goodness, mummy, what 2 brary he's in We watched the litle man as he dodged nimbly in and out of the trafic. When he reached the other side of the street, he tured let, walking very fat “He does't look very tied to me, does he to you, mummy? My mother didn’t answer. "He doee't look as though he's trying to get» tax, ether’ Laid ‘My mother was standing very still and stf, staring across the street atthe litle man, We could see him clearly. He was in a terifc hurry, He was bustling along the pavement, sidestepping the other ped- ‘strians ard swinging his arms like a soldier on the march ‘He's up to something” my mother sai, stony faced “But what 11 don't know.’ my mother snapped. ‘But Fm going to find out Come with me” She tock my arm and we crossed the steet together Then we turned let “Can you see him? my mother asked. “Yes. There he is. He's turing right down the next street” ‘We came to the comer and turned right. Th litle man was about twenty yards ahead of us. He was scuttling along like a rabbit and we had to walk very fast to keep up with him. The rain was pelting down harder than ever now and I could see it dripping from the brim of his, ‘on to his shoulders, Bul we were sug, big sik umbrella, “What ishe up to’ my mother said. “What i he tums round and sees us’ 1 asked, ‘Idon't care if he does, my mother said. He lied to us, He said he W2s too tired to walk any further and he's practically running us off ‘our fet! He's a barefaced lia! Hes» cook? "You rmean he's nota titled gentleman’ | asked Be quiet’ she sid At the next crossing, the litle man turned right again “Then he tuered let ‘Then right dry under cur lovely The Umbrella Man 9 ‘tm not giving up now’ my mother said. ‘He's disappeared” {cred. Where's he gone?” ‘He went in that door! my mother said. saw hit! Into that house! Great heavens i's a publ TH was a pub. In big letters right across the front it said tHe xx "You're not going inate you, mummy? “No, she std. ‘Well watch from outside” “There was a big plate-glas window along the front of the pub, and. although it was 4 bit steamy on the inside, we could see through it very well f we went dose. ‘We stood huddled together outside the pub window. I was clutching my mother’s arm, The big raindrops were making a loud noise on cur tunbrella. There he is’ I sid. ‘Over there. ‘The room we were looking into was full of people and cigarette smoke, and our little man was in the middle of it all He was now without his hat and coat, and he was edging his way through the Ccowd towards the bar, When he reached it, he placed both hands on the bar itself and spoke to the barman. | saw his lips moving as he gave his order, The berman tumed away from him for a few seconds nd came back with 2 smallish tumbler filled to the brim with light brown liquid. The litle man placed a pound ote en the counter. “That's my pound! my mother hissed. ‘By golly, he's got « nerve! “What's inthe glass? asked, ‘Whisky’ my mother sid. Neat whisky” ‘The barman didnt give him any change from the pound. ‘That must be a treble whisky, my mummy said, ‘What's a treble” I asked, “Thee times the normal measure’ she answered, ‘The liltle man picked up the glace and pt it to is lips. He tilted it gently. Then he tied it higher... and higher ..and higher and very fon ll the whisky had disappeared down his throat in one long pour “That's a jolly expensive drink’ I ssid Ws siiculous?’ my mammny ssid. Fancy paying ® pound for some thing to sallow in one gor” "I cost him more than a pounds’ I sid, It cost him a twenty-pound sik unbrela, 8 it did’ my mother said. THe must be mad” The little man was standing by the bar with the empty glass in his hand, He was smiling nov, and « sort of golden glow of pleasure was spreading over his round pink face. I saw his tongue core out to lick210 20 20 10 Ten Short Stories the white moustache, as though searching for one last drop ofthat precious whisky. Sowly, he fumed away from the bar apd edged his way back though the crowd to where his hat and coat were hanging. He put on his hat, He put on his coat. Then in @ manner so superbly cool and casual that you hardly noticed anything at all he lifted from the coat- rack one ofthe many wet umbrellas hanging there and of he went ‘Did you see that my mother shicked. Did you sce what he did “Sishh I whispered. He's coming out? We lowered our umbrella to hide our faces. and peered out from under it Out he came, But he never looked in our direction. He opened his new umbrella over his head and scurie off down the road the way he had come. ‘So that's his tle game my mother sid ‘Neat I sid. Super Wie followed him back to the main stret where we had fist met him, and we watched him as he proceeded, with no trouble at al, to exchange his new unbrela for another pound note, Ths time was with fall thin fellow who did't even have a coat or hat. And as soon 2 the transaction was completed, ou bile man toted off down the street and was lost in the crowd. But this time he went inthe opposite direction “You see how clever hei my mother suid. He never goes tothe same pub twice “He could go on doing this all night’ sid. “Yes! my mother said. ‘Of couse. But I bet he prays like mad for rainy days? DIP IN THE POOL ON THE MORNING of the third day, the sea calmed. Even the most delicate passengers ~ those who had not been seen around the {hip since saling time ~ emerged from ther cabins and crept on to the fan deck where the deck steward gave them chairs and tucked rugs ‘ound their legs and left them lying in rows, their faces uptumed to the pale, almost heatles January sun. If had been moderately rough the first two days, and this sudden calm and the sense of comfort that it brought created a more genial atmosphere over the whole ship. By the time evening came, the passengers, with twelve hours of good weather behind them, were beginning to feel confident, and at eight o'dock that night the main daung-room was filled with people eating and drinking with the assured, complacent ir of seasoned sailors. "The meal was not half over when the passengers became aware, by the slight friction between their bodies and the seats oftheir chairs. that the big ship had actually started rolling again. It was very gentle at fist, justa slow, lazy leaning to one side, then to the other, but it was enough to cause a subtle, immediate change of mood over the whole room. A few of the passengers glanced up from thei food, hesitating, wating. _aimost listening fo the next roll smiling nervously, litle secret glimmers ‘of apprehension in their eyes. Some were completely unrufled. some ‘were openly smug, a number ofthe smug anes making jokes about food and weather in order to torture the few who were beginning to sue. ‘The movement of the ship then became rapidly more and more violent, ad only five or sx minutes after the fst rol had been noticed she was swinging heavily from side to side, the passengers bracing themselves in their chars, leaning against the pull asin a car comering, ‘At Tas the really bad roll came, and Mr Wiliam Botibol siting at ‘hs pwren’s table, saw his plate of poached turbot with hollandaise sce sliding suddenly away from under his fork. There was ¢ Butter ‘of excitement, everybody reaching for plates and wineglasses. Mrs Renshaw, seated atthe purser’s right, gave alittle scream and cutched that gentleman's arm.