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12/6/2017 What I Know About Germans Liv Hambrett
Liv Hambrett
(http://www.livhambrett.com/)
An Australian Writer in (North) Germany
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What I Know About Germans
Here are some things about Germany and its inhabitants I have noticed during my time
spent here, living in Mnster, North Rhine-Westphalia, Weiden in der Oberpfalz, Bavaria
and Kiel, Schleswig-Holstein.
The beautiful, illustrated BOOK of What I Know About Germans (ebook and paperback)
created by berlin (http://uberlin.co.uk/)and illustrated by Josh Bauman
(http://www.joshbauman.com/),is now available to purchase. Youll find it here!
(http://www.uberlin.co.uk/what-i-know-about-germans/)
My new list, What I Know About North Germans, is here!

(http://www.livhambrett.com/2017/01/25/what-i-know-about-north-germans/)
(http://www.livhambrett.com/wp-content/uploads/2010/05/wikagcover.jpg)
1. Germans are tall.

2. They enjoy dairy products. The refrigerated section of their supermarkets are homages to experimentations with yoghurt and
quark. They will put a cheese or cream-based sauce with most things.
3. Sauerkraut is both enjoyed and oft consumed, as per the universal expectation.
4. But the cabbage thing doesnt stop there. Both krautsalat and rotkohl are regular meal (and dner) companions, the latter
readily available in the frozen section of your local supermarket.
5. Germans have excellent winter wardrobes (perhaps because German winters are endless.)
6. They are punctual. Its in their genetic make up. They cannot be late.
7. In fact, Germans place an enormous premium on the three Ps Practicality, Punctuality and Planning.
8. Their babies are particularly beautiful.
9. They are very good bike riders nay, they are exceptional bike riders. They manage to look elegant while free-wheeling down
cobbled streets, pashminas blowing out behind them. They are also highly adept at riding with umbrellas.
10. Thus, German kids learn to ride young. They start in small wagons attached to their parents bicycles and move through the
ranks until, at 6 years old, they are fully fledged members of the cycling community.
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11. Germans can eat. And drink. A lot. They have excellent constitutions.
12. They love meat. In all its incarnations. Raw, fried, crumbed and dripping in mushroom sauce. But mostly, processed and stuffed
into stomach lining.
13. Germans worship wurst.

14. Germans worship the pig. He is revered as both a lucky (Glcksschwein) and delicious little fellow in this country and there is
no part of the pig that cannot be boiled, shredded, fried, processed, mashed, diced and consumed. And there is no end to the
various pig likenesses that can be crafted from marzipan.
15. They can and do, often, stomach minced raw pork for breakfast topped with onion and a bit of pepper.
16. They are good at mostly anything they do. Or, if theyre not, they try hard and become competent. Because
17. Germans are thorough. They seem to live by the do it once and do it well principle. They work hard and effectively, despite
working some of the shortest hours in the western world.
18. Consequently, they are the strongest economy in Europe. What they do during those short hours is probably double what every
other country manages to do in twice the time.
19. For many Germans, the weekend begins at 1pm on Friday afternoon. The weeks work has been done and done well and now it
is time to enjoy the spoils of a well-spent weekend.
20. They speak English better than most English people I know, or at least get their there, theyre and their correct every time
which is more than many English speakers can say.
21. They have unexpectedly wicked senses of humour. David Hasselhoff, anyone?
22. a man they continue to embrace by playing Looking for Freedom far, far more than any other country.
23. They love a good boot.
24. And they never scuff them. Even when bike-riding down a cobbled street in the rain, holding the shopping and an umbrella,
pulling a wagon behind them with a child contained within.
25. They do not suffer fools gladly, thus only put up with drunk Australians and Americans during Oktoberfest because well pay
hideous amounts of money for hideous amounts of beer.
26. They are extremely hospitable.

27. They seem to enjoy Westlife. And Take That. And Backstreet Boys.
28. In fact, your garden variety house party can often remind its attendants of the universality of 90s pop.
29. Were you aware Germany was responsible for the 90s smash, Coco Jumbo?
30. Germans simply do not understand thongs/flip flops/jandals as viable footwear. Even when its warm and sunny, and a boot is
impractical or too warm for the feet to be comfortable. Outside of a very small, very obviously Summer window, they will stare,
bewildered, at thonged feet and quietly wonder if the wearer is mad.
31. They love a large, mind-bogglingly well stocked hardware store (with a bratwurst stand out the front). Perhaps because another
mantra of the Germans could be; if you want something done well, do it yourself. Therefore they must be permanently well
equipped to do things themselves, like renovate apartments with the help of a good friend and a few beers.
32. Germans lose their shit when the sun comes out and act in a manner I can only describe as suspicious. They flock to outdoor
cafes and tip their faces to the sun but remain in boots and jeans with a pashmina close by. Even when its 25 degrees. Even
when its obvious the weather isnt going to turn. Because
33. Germans are always prepared for the rain.

34. They are very fair people and largely adhere to regulations that exist to keep things fair for the masses.
35. This works because Germans love a good rule. And they reap the benefits of a rule-abiding society.
36. They dont appreciate the use of the rude finger when driving. If you give it to a fellow driver, that driver reserves the right to
report you and your licence plate and you will get a fine.
37. Not that it will break the bank fines for breaking road rules here are, on average, about 30. When rules arent that often
broken, you dont need large rule-breaking deterrents.
38. They love the breakfast meal and fill the table with four different types of cheese, five different types of meat and a basket of
bread rolls.
39. As a general bread rule, Germans seem to enjoy a darker or seeded bread. Or at least bread with a long name that nods to
exciting contents.
40. In the same vein of their love for enormous hardware stores, Germans favour a mesmerisingly large Ikea (and other such
stores in the same vein as Ikea) complete with an upstairs restaurant, a downstairs cafe and the all important bratwurst stand
out the front. Because
41. Germans can always enjoy a bratwurst, no matter the time, no matter the place. And they never seem to drip the sauce all over
themselves.
42. Germans dont jay-walk. And they judge those who do with a piercing, back-burning gaze.
43. They are refreshingly comfortable with nudity. The further East you go, the more apparent this becomes.
44. Germans are generally candid, frank people.
45. German men dont tend to leer lewdly.
46. But, Germans stare. Not in a way designed to be particularly rude, but in an unabashed, piercing, inquisitive way that makes
you wonder if you have food on your face or your skirt is tucked into your underpants.
47. Germans love doing Kaffe und Kuchen for all sorts of occasions.
48. Collectively, German people seem to have a very sweet tooth and the cake, biscuit, chocolate, sweets aisles of their supermarket
are of Willy Wonka proportions.
49. Germans can drink. And not just write themselves off, vomit in the bath tub at 2am, wedge in a kebab and back it up the
following night, a la American/English/Australian binge drinkers but drink. While the rest of the world is vomiting in the
bath tub, the Germans are calmly ingesting their 57th shot and washing it down with a beer, their cheeks a little rosy, their eyes
a little glazed, but their livers working as smoothly as a German made automobile.
50. This is because Germans start drinking young. They are allowed to drink soft alcohol at 16 and hard alcohol at 18. By the time
were all losing our shit with the Breezers, the Germans are enjoying a much more tempered relationship with alcohol and
the benefits of a much more match-fit liver.
51. They dont necessarily say it to you face, at the time but Germans dont like it when you go against the tide in the
supermarket.
52. Or get on the bus through the wrong door. This they will say to your face, using a microphone and an unimpressed tone.
53. If there was a study done on countries and how well they dance in a club/bar situation, Germany probably wouldnt be in the
top ten for general skill. But would they would absolutely ace the enthusiasm component.
54. Germans struggle enormously with the concept of naked feet. It is better feet be clothed at all times.
55. Germans, largely, are always exceptionally well groomed.
56. They embrace one hit wonders. Royalties from German radio probably single-handedly keep the singers the rest of the world
wants to forget, in rent-money.
57. Germans are not afraid to whip out the smoke machine on the dance floor.
58. They are not ones to make small talk at the supermarket check-out. Or in general, really.
59. In fact, Germans hate small talk. Words without purpose are wasted words.
60. This is because Germans are generally extremely direct people. They do not see a need for conversational subtext. They say it
as they see it, while keeping you at the appropriate arms length distance. Directness and distance are valued social
commodities.
61. Apropos, Germans will always try and shake your hand, even if you feel youve reached the status of hugging.
62. But when you crash through those notorious barriers, you have a German pal for life.
63. Germans enjoy frozen vegetables.
64. Germans are generally very open and relaxed about most things sex related.
65. They have the single most nerve-wrackingly rapid supermarket check-outs in the world.
66. Germans seem to really enjoy watching (dubbed) How I Met Your Mother, Two and a Half Men and The Big Bang Theory.
67. And reading crime fiction.
68. They love their dogs. Often their dogs catch the bus with them and sometimes their dogs even dine with them in restaurants.
69. Germans. Love. Bakeries.
70. They dont tend to go to the shops in track-pants and slippers.
71. It saddens me to report there seems to be a higher instance of socks and sandals paired together in Germany, than in other
countries.
72. Germans seem to be distrustful of any beverage that doesnt sparkle and, despite having excellent tap water, relegate it to
second best beneath the bottled, sparkling stuff.
73. They also seem to enjoy mixing drinks. For example, their beloved cola/orange soft drink Spezi, Schwip Schwap, Mezzo Mix.
And the truly excellent Apfelschorle, apple juice and sparkling water. And why stop at white wine spritzers when you can have
a red wine spritzer?
74. In keeping with this, they enjoy mixing beer (with cola, pear, cactus fruit, lime) which, for a nation famed for its superior beer
production, is somewhat unexpected.
75. Germans like buying drinks in six packs of 1.5l bottles which are then dutifully recycled, bottle by bottle.
76. It is extremely rare to see a German throw out a recyclable bottle and, if they do (in the midst of a brain-snap) someone passing
by the rubbish bin will very quickly pull the bottle out and take it to the recycling automat themselves.
77. During large events (festivals, Summer grilling bonanzas) there will be people making serious money by collecting revellers
beer bottles.
78. They arent big on bread slicing. Sliced bread, toast brot, is relegated to the toaster and sandwiches made with sliced bread
enjoy a disproportionately small section of the bakery display in comparison to their friends, the brtchen.
79. Germans love Dackels (Dachshunds) and seem to own several of them at once. Perhaps this adoration of Dachshunds stems
from their physical similarity to wurst.
80. Germans extract a curiously large amount of pleasure from the acts of giving, receiving and processing paperwork. They revel
in it. Photocopy it. Sign it. Photocopy it again. Roll in it. Cover themselves with it and inhale the scent of paper.
81. Those who work for the German government seem to never work at all. Its like their entire system is efficient enough to
work by itself, without humans doing anything except photocopying and stamping things.
82. Some German banks take lunch breaks which is unfortunate because many working people can only do their banking in their
own lunch breaks.
83. Germany loves a public holiday. Bavaria in particular.

84. Germans have this thing with bureaucracy.
85. Should a contestant, for example, on a family friendly celebrity special game show or something, be a nude model, German TV
is totally down with displaying a great deal of her portfolio, to the audience at home. Pre 9pm. In fact, pre 8pm.
86. They are rather thrifty and dont have the weird Anglo qualms with talking about money.
87. Germans seem to enjoy camping and driving campervans through Europe.
88. They are bizarrely superstitious about wishing people a Merry Christmas too early, opening presents early and celebrating
birthdays early.
89. Germans have bottomless basements.

90. Boris Becker and Til Schweiger are the go-to celebrities for game shows.
91. Germans. Love. Football. Love it. In fact the most passionate you will ever see a German is when they are watching, talking
about, thinking about, dreaming about or playing, football.
92. You may also catch a German in an act of passion if you raise the topic of cars. Germans love their cars and are very proud of
their ability to make such good ones. Just ask them.
93. It is a good thing they have good cars and an Autobahn of terrifying speed because the Deutsche Bahn is Germanys dirty little
inefficient secret. Delays comes with your ticket purchase, free of charge. Its DBs gift to you.
94. Most Germans seem to always buy or possess the appropriate public transport tickets, even though there are so many occasions
upon which they could get away with not having one. This sense of honesty will eventually rub off on you.
95. Germans of a certain age really enjoy Jack Wolfskin jackets. Come Winter, Germany turns into a sea of identical jackets,
peoples age distinguishable only by the brand theyre wearing.
96. There is an obvious divide when it comes to what kind of high school you went to and what kind of leaving certificate you
gained. And what kind of further education you go on to do, whether it be university for an extremely long period of time
honestly, no one does university quite like the Germans or one of Germanys millions of Ausbildungen (apprenticeships).
97. The whole country quivers with excitement every New Years Eve when they sit down and watch Dinner for One. But the
supremely odd thing isnt a national obsession with a 1960s black and white sketch comedy from another country that has
nothing to do with New Years Eve, but the fact that this is the one film the Germans dont dub.
98. Germans have this thing with online privacy. It is a rare German indeed who uses their full name on Facebook as opposed to a
bizarre cross section of their first and last names, eg: Mo Na Berg or Le Na.
99. Germans cant queue. Full stop, the end. They dont know how, they have no interest in trying. This is the one time Germans
embrace a lack of system and what happens when a queue is called for is the unfortunate culmination of Germanic
forcefulness and uncertainty in the face of a system-less world.
100. Take, for example, what happens in a supermarket when another check out line opens. Instead of calmly indicating the person
at the top of the queue, yet to unload their basket onto the conveyor belt, should head up the new checkout line, there is this
mad dash like a scattered flock of sheep, and ones standing in the original queue becomes completely irrelevant. If you are fast
enough, you can theoretically come from well behind and end up getting served before the person five people in front of you,
who has been patiently waiting for 10 minutes. And no one thinks anything of it.
101. Germans can open a beer bottle with anything. The couch, a coffee mug, a banana. Body parts. Its like they all secretly take a
class at school when theyre eleven, in preparation for a life time of beer consumption.
102. Should you not have a garden, but yearn for one, you can rent a small square of land called a Kleingarten (or Schrebergarten).
Here you can cultivate a garden and sit back and enjoy the fruits of their labours by resting in a little hut. The Kleingrten
(small gardens) are kept neat by the adherence to a set of rules specifically developed by and for each community.
103. In the average German garden, big or small, you will notice they seem unable to resist the lure of the garden gnome. There is
almost always one, lurking sinisterly beneath a bush, or partaking in some sort of Mise-en-scne with other concrete characters
and a perfectly clipped shrub.
104. Stefan Raab. He owns Germany.

105. Germans are inordinately proud of their states, districts, district-free cities, city states, regions, sub-regions, dialects, entirely
different vocabularies, sub-cultures, traditions, festivals and basically being really different from the ten-house village that is
5km away because that ten-house village is in an entirely different region and therefore nothing like this village.
106. Generally speaking, Germans simply love celebrating.

107. And dressing up.
108. And that dastardly Schlager music which they all know the words to.
109. Often all three passions are combined at an inexplicable pop-up festival that features, without exception, the following:
medieval beer stalls, a pommes stand and a wagon with a dazzling array of sugared nuts, waffles and chocolate covered baked
goods.
110. And Spargel. They love Spargel and anything to do with Spargel, like Spargel peelers and Spargel steamers and Spargel platters.
Forget Christmas or Easter or any other notable markers, the German year revolves around Spargelzeit.
111. Germany has assumed the dner kebab as a national dish, Germanified it with pickled cabbage and elevated it to where it now
sits, loftily, alongside other key German snacks like currywurst and fischbrtchen.
112. Germans largely respect Quiet Time on Sundays, when they dont vacuum, use lawn mowers or other loud appliances and
generally keep noise levels to a bare minimum. In some parts, an unspoken evening Quiet Time is enforced, via disapproval or
neighbourly note leaving.
113. Church bells are exempt from all Quiet Times.

114. As ingrained in the German psyche as Quiet Time on Sunday, is the Sunday viewing of crime show, Tatort.
115. Germans have really embraced the organic food trend and dedicate shelves to products emblazoned with BIO.
116. Germans make loyal, warm, life-long friends.
117. German television seems to produce a startling array of game shows very close to but not quite the same as Who Wants to
be a Millionaire?
118. They like saying juhu!

119. While they may borrow the concepts for their solid repertoire of scripted reality TV, the German population yields the
strangest, most awkward characters in the entire genre.
120. Germans can have entire conversations that consist solely of the word doch.
121. Occasionally they replace doch with eben, if it fits, grammatically.
122. They like buffets.
123. And house shoes.
124. Germans seem to enjoy bringing activities to the park, when the weather is fine. Things like wooden blocks to throw around
and rope to tie between trees as a sort of make-shift tightrope.
125. They like drinking yoghurt.

126. They can eat enormous sausages clamped between very small bread rolls, smothered in sauce, while walking and
talking,andnot getting a drop of it on themselves.
127. Germans make for extremely excitable sports commentators.

128. Mark Twain was not lying about the German language.
129. It is always too hot, too cold, too windy, too warm, too humid, too snowy or too rainy.
130. Germans blame 95% of ailments on the weather.
131. They may be the only people in the world to a) have a word for and b) accept the
notion of Frhjahresmdigkeit Spring time fatigue.
132. On that note, no one does a compound word like the Germans.
133. Germans like going to Ikea just to eat hotdogs.
134. No matter where you go to a festival, on a road trip, to a sporting event you will
find a clean public toilet.
135. Contrary to all evidence pointing to a socially restrained and reserved people,
Germans are actually quite excitable.
136. They are extremely good natured when it comes to laughing at themselves (and
accepting lists like the very one youre reading.)
137. Meals with Germans can be quite quiet affairs, the participants seeming to adhere to
the unspoken rule of Eat Now, Talk Later.
138. Many Bavarians have enormous moustaches.
139. The mullet is alive and well in Germany.
140. As per Point 99 Germans Cannot Queue they are terrible pusher-innerers.
141. As per Point 123 Germans Like House Shoes many Germans seem to choose a pair
of fake Crocs both for themselves and their children, as a general house/garden shoe.
142. Many, manyGermans (and, to be fair, Dutch people) seem to love camping, camper-
vans, camping grounds, and holidays that combine all three in a country like France
or Italy.
143. Germans love their hobbies.
144. A favoured hobby seems to be hiking.
145. Indeed, Germans enjoy walking in general, particularly after a meal, or indeed on a
quiet Sunday afternoon (in pairs, wearing matching Jack Wolfskins).
146. Tchibo.
147. Germans are, surprisingly, rather enthusiastic applauders. They especially seem to
enjoy falling into the rhythmic clap, while performers are taking their bows.
148. I have noticed Germans seem to enjoy seasonal decorations for their front doors,
doorsteps, gardens etc. A floral wreath for Spring, a twiggy one for Autumn (along
with pumpkins and red leaves), your classic evergreen conifer for Christmas. Und.
So. Weiter.
149. In keeping with their love of all things ornamental, Germansreallyseem to like
home decor stores, ranging from the kitsch (Nanu Nana, Butlers) to the positively
chic (any store thats name features the words Lebensart or Landart).
150. You will never actually see a German doctor at the appointed time. That famous
German punctuality doesnt exist in medical practices.
151. At many social gatherings, you will find a plate of cheese cubes and grapes, held
together with a toothpick.
152. Germans and their pharmacies have a lot of faith in the healing powers of
homeopathy and herbal teas.
153. Speaking of teas, Germans enjoy fruit teas immensely, including flavours such as
strawberry and cream or blueberry yoghurt.
154. Germans love being in, strolling and/or hikingthrough, or just flat out enjoying, the
nature.
This list (at the time numbering 78 points) ran over at berlin
(http://www.uberlin.co.uk/what-i-know-about-germans/)in 2012 and for a reason no one will
ever understand, went viral. Then it went viral again, in 2013. The enormous response to the
list has thus far included over 100,000 likes on Facebook (IMAGINE!) mentions on the
Facebook pages of Stern, Bild.de and Financial Times Deutschland, a write up in the Swiss
paper, Tages-Anzeiger, and listings on all manner of forums and other sites. Andthatswhy
we made a book!
Follow (https://twitt Save (http://digg.c

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794 thoughts on What I Know About Germans
soy lin says:

28 December, 2010 at 10:19 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
germans/what-i-know-about-germans/#comment-1953)
Hi Dear Soy Lin

Happy Christmas! Hope it was fabulous & white.
I love this article. I have 2 german bosses in my role in Singapore (of all people!) i can
empathise with lots of this list. Not sure about the nudity one though (thankfully)!
Love soy
Reply (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-germans/what-i-know-about-germans/?
replytocom=1953#respond)
atpresent says:
29 November, 2013 at 8:42 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
Youve clearly never lived in Berlin, where I was born. A lot of people I know are
vegetarian, Doener is way more popular here than Bratwurst, we jail walk, walk in flip
flops and shorts in the summer and do a lot of other things which you describe Germans
wouldnt. I am also notoriously never in time.
Liv says:
30 November, 2013 at 8:18 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
Its true, Berlin breaks all the rules!
Scratch (http://www.pyromusic.de) says:

1 December, 2013 at 4:44 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
An old german actor once dropped this rhyme:

Du bist verrckt mein Kind, du musst nach Berlin!
Wo die Verrckten sind, da gehrst du hin!
Sing along: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S0tmZP87eJ0

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S0tmZP87eJ0)
If you manage to decode the lyrics, you know the secret of how the Germans keep
their country neat and tidy.
Reply (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-germans/what-i-know-about-
germans/?replytocom=7482#respond)
Liv says:
2 December, 2013 at 3:16 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-
germany-germans/what-i-know-about-germans/#comment-7521)
Okay, I am going to have to give this a crack.
Alica says:
2 May, 2014 at 1:40 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
In Berlin and Hamburg
Like the traffic light at the biggest shopping street:

30 seconds to walk and 60 to drive for cars.
but they always have just about 30-20 seconds because everyone just ignore the red
light.
Only tourists stop
Jan (http://www.gesthuizen.de) says:

And thats one of the many reasons nobody likes Berlin.
Kat says:
once a Berliner, allways a Berliner
motorradblogger (http://www.thegeek.de) says:

6 February, 2014 at 6:24 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-
Berlin ist scheie.
Karin Myers (https://www.facebook.com/karin.myers2) says:

Absolutely, I live in the USA (not necessarily by choice) BUT I AM STILL AND
FOREMOST AND FOREVER eine Berlinerin.
Karin Myers (https://www.facebook.com/karin.myers2) says:

To Kat: Yesss! And proud of it.
atpresent says:
10 December, 2013 at 6:21 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-
I am sorry that you think so Jan. I understand that a lot of people in Germany look
jealously at Berlin, because its poor and ugly but everyone wants to fucking live there.
Its the counter-part of German monoculture, traditions and boredom. Its Ku-Damm,
Techno Parties everywhere, Government City, Capital, Russian Architecture, NSA,
Cold-War, Vibrant, International, Artsy, you name it.
And you should be happy that Berlin is not decoupled from the rest of Germany like
Paris is from France. Pretty much any French person I asked told me that Parisians
are pricks and live in the their own world. Friends that live in Paris. Paris is not
France and vice versa. Cest ca.
Berlin is a part of Germany and so is Weisswurst and Hefeweizen. I am happy that Liv
lived in more parts of Germany than I did, but I just dont like it when people want to
tell as an Berliner how Germans are. I invite all of you to come.
AMS says:
6 February, 2014 at 12:11 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-
Its simply not true that everyone wants to live in Berlin. Thats what you want to
think. I have to live in Berlin and I heard a lot of people saying (like me) that its
okay and fun for a certain period to live here but not for a hole live. And I heard
people that were born in Berlin saying, when theyre going to have kids theyll
never raise them in Berlin. Of course I also have friends that really love living here
and wants to stay. But you have to mention both sides.
fjva (http://fjva.wordpress.com) says:

Well I live in Paris, and I find there are more French people who hate on Paris and
Parisians than the Parisians hate on the rest of France.
Its amusing in fact that a lot of people who live in Paris say the same as what AMS
says of Berlin : good to live in for a while, but if you have kids, its best to raise them
somewhere else.
This being told, I love Germany and love the list above.
But its also true that its not true everywhere. Ive been in different German towns
in different Lnder, and the vibes and behaviors really vary. And its cool
(I find the coolest people are in North Rhine-Westphalia. Didnt like much Berlin
myself)
Cedric says:
5 May, 2014 at 1:06 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
Really, nott everyone wants to live in Berlin. There is even a quite famous song:
Ich will nicht nach Berlin (I dont want to go to Berlin)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RhlfIx7t46o (https://www.youtube.com/watch?
v=RhlfIx7t46o)
It is right, Berlin is a big part of Germany and paradoxically it is not like the rest of
Germany. It is different, what attracts all people that cannot identify with those
clichs mentioned in the list above. [In fact I like Berlin as much as any other town
of Germany :)]
KatLou says:
24 January, 2014 at 4:52 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
Thats so rude. I live in Bavaria, Munich actually. I love Munich and Berlin for very
different reasons. I would live in Berlin in a heartbeat. What a shame your parents
never taught you manners.
Tom Rheker (http://facebook.com/tom.rheker) says:

22 February, 2014 at 7:40 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-
Hey KatLou =) (and the others)
No one has to love Berlin or has to want to live in Berlin but to say everyone hates
Berlin is just wrong.
I am happy being in Berlin but I guess you can find your peace anywhere. In
Germany in any city and in the rest of the world in any city, as well.
And, KatLou I guess, some people of today just forget about their parent-teached
manners. Dont understand why.
Karin says:
True that. Im from rheinland- pfalz.
Bea says:
23 July, 2017 at 3:36 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
Yup. I hate Berlin and tell Tourists not to go lol. A native Stuttgarter I can totally agree
with this list.
AufgewachsenInNiedersachsen says:
Thats because Berlin is a lot more multi-cultural than rural cities. Which also means that
anyone growing up in Berlin (after the war, and lets say 1970) will have picked up more
foreign influences from Auslndern than a German growing up in a different city
Olaf says:
You are all fulfilling observation no. 105
Nicole says:
24 January, 2014 at 11:23 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-
Daumen hoch!
a-mon says:
i also like no. 105
Lance Boyle says:

15 February, 2014 at 9:27 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
Frankfurt is the most international city in Germany. Im not sure what a rural city is.
I think what your suggesting is silly since there are Auslnder everywhere.
Mieke says:
I think most of the things are true, I have been in Australia and I know thongs are the
most important shoes over there, of course some People wear them in Germany but its
not the same
Nils says:
Ive lived in D for a couple of years now, but at last I realise why people look so
strangely at my feet. I love flip-flops! But at least now I know its not down to my
skinny feet or ugly toe-nails
Nicole says:
I think that might partly because of the flip-flops but also because of the German
Stare
Nicole says:
24 January, 2014 at 11:38 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
MOKASSINS! Thats what Australians wear, dont they?

And UGG BOOTS. A fashion item that has saddeningly been accepeted as proper boot
by most German girls and women!
Figanootz (@Figanootz) (http://twitter.com/Figanootz) says:

That is because Berlin is the capital of Turkey
Peter says:
Only the third, after Istanbul and Ankara.
Michaela says:
Ist doch immer super zu sehen das ein paar mal Urlaub in unserer Heimat machten und
dann behaupten sie wuerden uns kennen
Schmitzi says:
11 February, 2014 at 5:10 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
Tja Michaela, speziell fr Leute wie Dich, msste Punkt 20 erweitert werden um
but they have difficulties with their own language.
Zudem sollte es extra fr Dich einen neuen Passus geben:
Lot of Germans go the basement for laughing!
soba says:
That seems to go with 105, Germans are inordinately proud of their states, districts,
district-free cities, city states, regions, sub-regions, dialects, entirely different
vocabularies, sub-cultures, traditions, festivals and basically being really different from
the ten-house village that is 5km away because that ten-house village is in an entirely
different region and therefore nothing like this village.
ilopol (http://facebook) says:

I been born and raised in Berlin (third Generation) that is true but only when the
condition allow it I never saw somebody went in in flip-flop to a concert etc if you never
on time I wonder how you can keep a job Smile
Alejandra says:
9 March, 2014 at 5:58 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
some of the items on the list do not match completely. but most do !
i live in germany, in berlin, and some(a lot of people) do use huge hiking boots with thick
white socks in the summer ^^
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Wordsmith Lane (http://wordsmithlane.com) says:

Oh Olivia, this is brilliant. I laughed out loud. ALOT. Bad thing when youre supposed to be
organising Scripture classes, which are clearly dying, in our state schools.
Pete says:
-Every single German child aged 5-12 has a Razor Scooter and a weird box shaped orange
backpack with reflectors. They are also always racing at least one other kid somewhere on
said scooter.
-For a weatlhy country, 25% refuse to invest in a shower curtain. Somehow they enjoy
showering in an open tub, in a cold room and are able to keep the rest of the bathroom dry.
-When at the beach, they cannot stand the feeling of a wet swimsuit on their body. As soon a
they get out of the water they quickly change into their reserve suit. (more true with older
generation and parents with children)
-Trekking poles are a sporty version of a medical walker for the elderly.
-40 to 65 yr. olds love zip off hiking pants and they have not two but three lengths..shorts,
pants, and capris.
Liv says:
I am in hysterics at the weird box shaped backpacks and the shower curtains. Yes. Yes.
Yes.
Jrgen Vo (https://www.facebook.com/Iotem) says:

Re: -When at the beach, they cannot stand the feeling of a wet swimsuit on their body.
As soon a they get out of the water they quickly change into their reserve suit I want
to add that maybe this is because we were told to do so by our parents since wearing wet
clothes (even swimsuits) in windy weather can lead to all sorts of awful illnesses
summer flu being the most harmless, compared to a cystitis etc. I was taught as a kid to
act thus and I never regretted it, Said as a frank, direct, outspoken, candid German
Oh, and BTW: using these trekking poles you mentioned is called Nordic Walking and I
dislike it enormously not just because the noise these sticks make on the pavement is
driving my dog bonkers. It does the same to me, and besides, IMHO it looks just plain
silly.
Venecia says:
Illnesses?! dont you say, really?!
Eric says:
My German wife says this all the time. Viruses cause illnesses, wet and cold causes
hypothermia.
Eve says:
So true. My husband (American) just wants to dry off in the sun, I need to get a dry
swimsuit on. Its just kind of how youre programmed, although I do know that cold
doesnt cause illnesses, which my American husband, on the other hand, thinks when
I sleep with the window open, even in winter (as a good German should).
Emmili says:
Regarding sleeping while the window is open: yes, yes, till the first week of
December! I love it and dont sleep well till the end of February. My husband is
from Chile, he cannot stand it.
Dom says:
#27: cross out German and replace it with Mnsters! I was shocked when I first went out here!
admin (http://www.oliviahambrett.wordpress.com) says:

Haahahahaha, it might be a Muensteranian thing, this LOVE of pop, although I have come
across SO MANY Germs who just love all things boy bands
Julia says:
I love it, Liv! And most of it so true!
But can I remind you of the musical choices on your birthday party?
And I do NOT like David Hasselhoff.
Frank the frank says:

No one here LIKES David Haselhoff. During the late 90s and early 2000s, I was something
like a party dog, and on no occasion, party, festival and so on ever those guys lyrics have
been played! In these days, David Haselhoff was considered to be a relic of the late 80s and
early 90s, and no host would have ever even considered to play his music!
Although, I have to admid, Ive been told that Germans are considered to be fans of the
Hoff in general, at least in the USA, but I still dont know where this comes from
Oh, by the way: Berlin is part of Germany, yes, but I, by all consideration, dont know
anyone who is jealous of Berlin Jealous becuase of what? State deficit? Bad educatin
system? Overrated real estate prices? Shall I go on? Thats just the kind of explanation the
Berlinians use to whitewash their own unhappy living situation
AMS says:
I agree!
Malte says:
hahah i love it been a german having lived in oz for about 2 years so much of this is sooo
true especially the naked foot thing loads of german do wear thongs but not without
socks haha (i have to say appriciate the oz way more)
and well.. for most of the other things is holarious how much its fits the profile of an ordinary
german i only dont agree with the David Hasselhof one.. (but probs most germans would)
and i got to extend the smalltalk bit smalltalk with a cashier in a supermarket.. ppl will look
and think can this line move any slower but once you meet them in the evening over a beer
(and maybe mention how good german beer is) they wont stop talking
but really well written!!!
Ryan says:
Haha, well, Im german, too, and I found out that americans dont really like talking about
beer at all they just drink what they have and get annoyed when you try to advertise
finally buying a good beed, not Corona, this mexican excuse for brackish water hahaha
Liv says:
Mmmmm, I have heard the Americans arent exactly known for their beer taste
lf says:
22 November, 2013 at 9:42 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-
AHEM some of us have pretty decent taste! Have you tried a Founders porter or a
Honker Ale before??
lf says:
and I LOVE to talk beer.
Liv says:
I have no doubt some of you have fantastic taste! Dont worry, when everyone
thinks of beer and Australia, they yell, FOSTERS! But we have sooooo much more
to offer!
rolloutofbed (http://rolloutofbed.wordpress.com) says:

Have you spent any time in Brooklyn or Portland? People are so into it, they make it at
home, write magazines about it, buy growlers, grab an empty table and then lament
on the goodness of the beer. Heck, Ive got a box of home brew in my kitchen.
Liv says:
I think the States is a little bit like Australia with beer, perhaps. Gets a bad rap
courtesy of a couple of beers (Fosters for us) but there is actually a huge passion for
the stuff and pockets of real beer culture all over the country.
Jane says:
9 December, 2013 at 6:47 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-
So true! I am a German living in Portland and people here really love beer.
Lance Boyle says:

Maybe educate yourself about the craft beer revolution which has been going on for
30 years. German beer is quite boring in comparison.
Frank the frank says:

Oh really? To which German beer brands do you have access? Lwenbru, Becks?
Yeah, those beers are quite a dissappointment, even to Germans. But what other
brands are we talking about here? Im from, Franconia, and here we have the
highest density of breweries in all the world, and I can tell you, the best German
beer isnt brewed for the export, but by little family-hold breweries. Dont get me
wrong here: I dont think that Americans are not capable of brewing good beer, I
just never heard an American here in Germany complain about the German beer,
but I heard a lot of Americans in the whole world complain about their own beer in
comparison with their own
Ian says:
Frank the frank hat recht! Franken has many, many little breweries that are
relatively unknown. One of my favorites was the Kommunalbier in Neuhaus near
Nrnberg. That being said, my favorite by far is Sdhang Bier from Amberg/Opf
(where I used to live)nectar of the gods!
Heather Schable says:

There are some true beer lovers here in the US. I dont drink bad beer. I look forward to
the day when I go back to Germany, and sit down to have a delicious beer. The beer I had
when I was in Germany was the most delicious beer I have ever tasted. I do enjoy talking
about beer as well.
Liv says:
26 November, 2013 at 1:10 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-
Hahaha, you are the perfect example of American beer lovers! I never cared much for
it, a cold lime and lager on a summers day was enough for me. But just by virtue of
living here, I have learnt more and tried more. But I cant do a big beer with dinner,
theres no room left for food!
ulriike weywoda says:

Decades ago my husband discovered Corona and we lugged and dont remember how
many 6packs back on the plane!!! I am not really a beer drinker, prefer good wine and
am very annoyed that almost all German Riesling in the US are sweet. If I want sweet I
will eat Lindt chocolats.
Janet MacLaren (http://facebook) says:

I love German dry Riesling but unfortunately the Germans keep it all to themselves. I
have looked all over for it in the US, but will have to wait until I go back to Germany to
drink it again!
kayla says:
emily eggerding
Phil says:
13 October, 2016 at 1:55 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-
thats for we are greedy bastards.

im from palatine and id always prefer a good wine or a weinschorle over a beer
(though sometimes i like one), but i guess if you decend from a wine- growing
region, thats supposed to be normal.
Julius says:
Im not sure but when i had my time in Oz, people from oz wore thongs with socks as well
Liv says:
Never! You must have been looking at tourists!
Ulrike says:
Thongs with sockshow can anyone walk in thongs with socks on? Anyway, unheard off
when I was living in Germany which was till 1970.
kayla says:
emily eggerdeen
hi (http://coolmath.com) says:
Is OZ another city?

Hahaha this is true the Germans are always in FINE form over a beer at the bar. Its when
theyre shopping that there is NO time for inefficiency haha.
phil says:
18 June, 2011 at 11:57 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
Touche,
Incredibly accurate, well mostly. I have two very good German friends (1 in Munster) and you
pretty much nailed it. especially the straight forward way they go about their lives. Excellent.

Thanks Phil I have a bit of fun with this one, to be fair, poor Germans haha. But I do love
them, theyre great people.
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amelie88 (http://ameliesayshola.wordpress.com) says:

24 April, 2012 at 12:03 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
hahaha the flip flop thingthats a European thing, not exclusively German. Americans wear
flip flops all the time (Im from NY and Ive seen girls wearing them in freezing weather which
I dont understand) and when I do wear them, I get stared at a lot, especially in France. They
consider them beach shoes, not street shoes.
And the sweatpants/gym wear attire to the storeanother American thing that Europeans dont
get. In Spain (where I currently live), its considered weird but people will assume you are on
your way to the gym. In France its a HUGE no-no.
Ingrid says:
5 September, 2012 at 9:29 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
I 100% agree with you! Spot on! I am German but not very traditional and some things I can
not gt myself!! Brgds Ingrid
Sille says:
I cant agree with the flip-flop thing. Im from germany, and especially young people around
here seem to like wearing flip-flops just as much as everybody else. maby not at cold days,
but during the summer flip flops are my n1 shoes
Liv says:
True! The younger generations are faaaar more okay with it!
coopersonic says:
Unfortunately, most people just dont have the feet to wear FlipFlops/thongs (i.e. too
ugly). And after all there are more Shoes between Thong and Boot, Horatio, than are
dreamt of in your philosophy.
Stefan says:
Flip-Flops are no shoes at all!!!
Well done list, Liv!
The thing about David Hasselhof He is as popular because of a concert after the Fall of the
Wall Even although nobody really likes him
Greetings from Mnchen

Stefan
Liv says:
What I love about David is that no one really likes him, youre right, and I think most of
the time Germans are laughing at David. But David feels ADORED by Germans (and the
Swiss, to be fair) and acts like he is the King when hes here.
FLIP FLOPS ARE SHOES MY FRIEND! The only ones you need!
Bob says:
Yes, beer is a great favorite in Germany. I particularly liked Ayinger, but its hard to find a
German beer that is anything less than very good. I dont recall which beer was served at
the Platzl in Munich, but I do remember that it was served in three-liter kegs. It went
well (fantastic) with the Bavarian shows they put on back in the 60s: Schuhplattler,
Jodeln, skits with Erni Singerl, Peter Neu, Karl Baierl, usw. Sadly, folksy entertainment
seems to have faded away (my observation from about 20 years ago). Regarding public
rest rooms, the only one I ever used that was not as it should have been was at a border
crossing point. Using the rest room at the Munich zoo was one of my most memorable
experiences. I was standing at the mens relief site and heard a swishing noise behind
me. I turned my head upon feeling something brush against my shoe and saw an older
woman mopping the floor. She obviously considered this to be all in a days work. I
accepted it as a part of the culture and simply went on with what I was doing.
Phil says:
13 October, 2016 at 2:10 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
not that id recommend, but we do have bad beer over here, too. mostly the very
cheap one. ever tried oettinger or germania pls?
or one of the tops of my no- dont- drink- it- list: karlsberg. quite a big brand, sold
pretty often (at least in the southwest part of germany) but it only tastes okayish when
its ice- cold. dont let it warm up for even 5 minutes or its yucky.
and to top it, it gives you massive headaches the next morning. took me a couple of
parties to find out.
but in general i guess its up to personal taste.

and of yourse germans are the best in making a good beer. maybe the irish can
compete. and eventually some begians. but other than those
should be an add- on to no. 105: germans tend not to be very patriotic about their
country, but more of the region they come from. and their beer.
Kerstin Moeller says:

I totally agree. But flip-flops are NO shoes, that is an illness. That looks so trashy.
Jeff Maltz says:

I agree with you about the sport clothing. I would never wear a sweatpant, unless Im
working out or walking in the park for a workout.
I can also explain wearing socks with sandals. I wear socks with sandals and clogs in the
USA. Why? Your feet sweat a lot even when you wear sandals or clogs and wearing socks
helps it keep the odor down. I also wear low cut socks with tennis shoes. Mens feet tend to
have strong odors. More of them ought to socks.
Chris says:
Ha, ha, its not that we dont get it, but that we have (sometimes) do have a sense of style
and fashion
Jean (http://cyclewriteblog.wordpress.com) says:

I showed this to my partner who is German Canadian. He immigrated to Canada after WWII as
a little boy, but has gone back several times to visit relatives, etc.
I totally agree about sweets, bakeries and breads for Germans. But then, its part of their
gastronomy. His mother was formally trained in pastry-making and hence, she made fantastic,
multi-layered tortes, kugelhof, etc. where one cannot equivalent recipes in English. Weve
tried, because he wanted to buy gift book for his son who is a chef in Toronto.
And yes, dearie agrees that the precision of German language is not as easily conducive to
small talk as other languages.
Yes, I agree that German culture fosters precision, punctuality, pragmatism and direct verbal
expression to achieve something. I worked for a German company in Canada and we had ex-
pats from German working for the firm. I also supervised some Germans, who were all those
adjectives but nice folks.
Doris says:
Kugelhof means ballcourt .. the cake you mean calls Gugelhupf
DCTdesigns (http://dctdesigns.wordpress.com) says:

24 April, 2012 at 5:30 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
Love this. I was in Munich in my 20s. Walking down the street one day I had to part a crowd of
people approaching me. I had this odd sense of coming home. There I stood 61 in a sea of
giants. I had never felt anything like it. Never been the shortest woman in the room. I was
tickled and awed by me own sense of small.
germanymarie (http://gmcinci.wordpress.com) says:

crying laughing over 23 and 53. Not even joking.

I have become like a German when the sun comes out! I still wear boots! I dont know why!
thisislemonade (http://thisislemonade.wordpress.com) says:

I would like to report re #58, Germans have finally made it to be trend-setters on the fashion
front this spring I am seeing socks in sandals everywhere, it is not a trend I will be following
but Forever 21 has it. Germans are officially trendy. This is a momentous time in the history of
the world much as I love Germans, I did not expect to ever be able to say this
averybusygirl (http://averybusygirl.wordpress.com) says:

Hiya! I have nearly peed myself laughing not because its funny (it is well-written and
enagages intelligent humour) but it is absolutely true! I have also live in Germany and
witnessed much of it first-hand! Its made my day to know that I am not the only one who
noticed these things. Thanks for the giggle! x
rococonnor (http://rococonnor.wordpress.com) says:

Im dating one whos half German hilarious, and true!
cassmob (http://cassmob.wordpress.com) says:

1 May, 2012 at 10:11 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-germans/what-
i-know-about-germans/#comment-1973)
I really enjoyed this list of Germanic behaviour. Apart from the Aussie shoe and casual wear
habits I suspect my great-great grandfathers German genes may have reached me. Must
remember #26 when driving in Germany next time Really look forward to the Bavarian
version of the series.
Makaveli_G (http://gfootsteps.wordpress.com) says:

28 May, 2012 at 10:06 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
Hi, I nominated your blog for a very inspiring Blog award

:http://gfootsteps.wordpress.com/2012/05/28/very-inspiring-blogger-award/
(http://gfootsteps.wordpress.com/2012/05/28/very-inspiring-blogger-award/)
Liv (http://www.a-biglife.com) says:

How lovely, shall put it in a post soon! Thank you!
Andy says:
6 June, 2012 at 12:03 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-germans/what-
Haha so true. They German family I stay with tick off everything on this list.
wolpertinger says:
I just found your blog and I guess youve heard it a thousand times: Youre an awesome writer.
But maybe Im just prejudiced because you liked Mnster during your stay. Being a
Mnsteraner myself I got perhaps a littlebit regional pride.
Anyway: Your last point confuses me. Dont you think the water here is kinda hard?

Thank you so very much. I loved Mnster and hope to go back there one day or back to
that part of Germany, anyway. So, re: the water (or Tapwatergate as it is being called on
berlin) I meant more that bottled water seems to be given so much more preference. I love
German tap water and drink it all the time but whenever I go to someones house and ask
for water, I get it out of a bottle still and sparkling! And a glass of tap water at a
restaurant/cafe is unheard of.
feli says:
The water at my house is kinda hard, sadly. But I drink it sometimes. Many Germans
drink it but its nice to have fresh water from the store at home. Also most people (not
me) prefer sparkling water.
Nevertheless, I wouldnt offer a guest tapwater unless I dont got anything else. Even to
close friends Im apologetic oh, sorry, I only got tapwater cause its kinda bad manners
since tapwaters free.
And of course you dont want tapwater at a restaurant! You pay them to get fancy food,
its expensive and stuff.
Liv says:
The water thing is so great it is like a class system of waters. I am always happy
with tap, wherever I go, and love getting a jug of still, tap water when I eat out, or a
glass of it when Im at a bar and need hydration. But here water is sparkling and
bottled unless you specifically request otherwise (and they look at you really weirdly,
like youre asking to lick the ground).
But I did notice, up North, the water was terribly kalky we had to de-kalk every few
weeks. And I never got knots in my hair until I came to Germany, so I think it is a bit
hard.
Bengt Weiberg says:

It might come a bit late but Germany indeed has a Class System for water, named
the Mineral- and Tapwater Act. Its even federal law! Look here:
http://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/bundesrecht/min_tafelwv/gesamt.pdf
(http://www.gesetze-im-internet.de/bundesrecht/min_tafelwv/gesamt.pdf)
As you can see: Germans have regulations for everything.^^ And I love it, even if
Im breaking them sometimes. Something you could put on your list, for a friend
the typical German has a last very important rule: If a friend is in need of
something, rules are there to be broken (which is even a German proverb, Regeln
sind dazu da, um gebrochen zu werden, Rules are made to be broken).
Greetings from Hannover, capital city of the federal state of Niedersachsen!

(regional pride ftw!!!)
Bengt
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Emi (http://fourleaves92.wordpress.com) says:

7 June, 2012 at 8:19 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-germans/what-i-
know-about-germans/#comment-1980)
I was just in Germany a week ago! I wasnt there long enough to notice all of these things, but I
was definitely amazed by their bike riding abilities! Ive never seen anyone ride bikes like they
do! Its awesome! Im from America so I was assuming that their love of
beer/bratwursts/sauerkraut was a bit of an exaggeration totally wrong. They love it! I loved
eating it! It was an awesome time and I cant wait to go back! I think I want to live there
someday!!
This was a great post!!
rgrzona (http://rgrzona.wordpress.com) says:

I was wondering about the bike riding abilities when I first read the post by Liv, and I am
still strugglingwhat do you mean in detail when it comes to bike riding skills? I thought
we ride bikes like everyone else would do !!!
Liv says:
Well, it is more the huge acceptance and love of cycling. I come from a country that isnt
that keen on cycling I mean, we can and do ride bikes, but our big cities are by far and
away car cities, cyclists are really ignored (and disliked, because the poor things have to
cycle on the roads, there are no cycle paths). So its more Germanys bike culture I am
constantly in awe of (and the whole riding a bike on icy pavements while looking quite
good!)
Tim says:
Im currently living in Sydney and thats one of the few things that I really miss here in
Australia. (in addition to the tap water thing :D) But if u see a bike, its always a good
one though! Havent seen an old and rusty one yet
Liv says:
It is true, Sydney-siders arent huge cyclists (although, theyre around!) But we do

drink tap water, often filtered, and water comes free at restaurants, and bartenders
are legally obliged to give you free glasses of water. No bottled fizzy stuff (unless
were being European hahaha.)
rgrzona (http://rgrzona.wordpress.com) says:

ah okay, I got you! Thats true, the infrastructure especially for bike riders is almost
perfect in big german cities!
Liv says:
Absolutely! Cyclists rule the roads here!
Hannah says:
Then you might have not been to the Netherlands before. Their caring for cycling is
unheard of. They literally seem to have a bike before anything else rule.
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winterlust (http://winterlust.wordpress.com) says:

7 June, 2012 at 11:20 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-germans/what-
THIS is why I need to live in Germany!! Pretty much every little observation youve made has
left me thinking, perfect! especially this one:
Germans do not see a need for conversational subtext. It is a waste of time and Germans do
not like wasting time. If you cannot say it as directly as possible, do not say it at all.
Although I only got to see Berlin, I was blown away by how much I loved the place.
Great post Olivia!
La Mian World (http://lamianworld.wordpress.com) says:

8 June, 2012 at 4:08 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-germans/what-i-
love it! I came across your post (and blog) via berlin and my German countrymen constantly
liking it on facebook
I just love the Germans liking it, it thrills me to the core! Because I love the Germans!
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standrewslynx (http://standrewslynx.wordpress.com) says:

Having spent a year in the Swiss-German part of Switzerland working alongside a number of
Germans, this post cracked me up because its all so true.
Your point about the sense of humour was spot on. In Britain (and I suspect elsewhere) the
stereotype of Germans is that they are a humourless race. In fact, the Germans & Swiss-
Germans are just incredibly dry. Really, really dry. And I love it.
Ingrid says:
well, I am afraid that most English people do not understand the sense of German humor
and the timing. Germans tend to be much more serious than English people, or anglo-
saxons but they are surely not humorless. Germans, as a tendency, believe that there is a
time for everything and take work much more serious than people in the UKas a tendency
(as I was told by a few people who lived there). Germans try to do their work, then go home
and have fun. English people should watch the German TV shows and the audience, then
they will see they are not bone-dry or even humorless. Infact the humor is becoming a lot
more gutsy these days, especially when it comes to making fun of Uncle Adolf and those
times, which used to be an absolute no-go only until a few years ago. Butwe do not
Schadenfreude so much!
Stephanie says:
Thats another Thing an English friend told me: You cannot have a German friend
without ending up in a conversation about WWII at some Point and the difficulty to
determine which effect it still has on Germans today.
Liv says:
It is true, I have had many a very good and very interesting conversation, not only
about the war, but also about the effects it had on future generations. I have found, for
the most part, Germans are actually very open and willing to talk about it, and hyper
aware of how it drastically affected the way they are perceived by other countries.
dinahjerusalem (http://mutigsein.wordpress.com) says:

actually, Germans generally are sick and tired of the English constantly harping on about
WWII, but will usually politely talk about it if the English bring up the subject. I am
German. We grow up saturated in war-guilt and dont really fathom the love-affair the
Brits have with this subject.
Yoko says:
15 March, 2014 at 2:33 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
In the 70/80 th. we where thought in school, to be ashamed to be a german, because of

the WWII. They begun early with it, in the elementary school. in every history, social,
ethic, religious lessons youve been told about the world war II and our guild. In
late 90s there war a question from a Magazin who has asked k elementary-School-
Kids! Are you prouf of Germany? They should send in the answer per mail etc. The
reaction from Jewish Zentralrat, was dissatrous! Why should they proud? Could you
be proud of a folk wo have murdered lots of poeple etc.. After that very few has send
in thier answer. An most of the Kids where very, very confused what they have done
wrong. Those Kids where born 40-55 Years AFTER the wwII! So, sey we are sick about
it, we dont understand the english peoples disturbing fascination WWII? This is sick!
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seiltanz (http://seiltanz.wordpress.com) says:

Love it
And i love drinking our tap water!
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daMax (http://blog.todamax.de) says:

Hahaha, this list is SO true. Very nice. I would disagree with #21 and #78 though. Me and many
of my friends do actually wear flipflops and drink tap water but then again, maybe we are not
the typical germany anyway
Im looking forward to reading the list about Bavaria.
MCBuhl (http://gravatar.com/mcbuhl) says:

Flip-Flops und verkrumpelte Fsse wrg! Wenn die Trger von Flip-Flops wenigstens ihre
Fsse pflegten Aber so wie die meisten aus ihren Gummistiefeln direkt in Flip-Flops
umsteigen. NO-NO.
random german says:

me as a german can confirm most, but not all of that! could also be that i am still a young
grown up most of these things relate more to people like my parents :). nevertheless, funny
to read. you always get teached in class about cultural differences in OTHER countries but
nothing is more refreshing than foreigners that confront you with a bunch of stereotypes
about your own culture
Ingrid says:
yes! I absolutely agree t this one, as a middle aged german female!!!! :-))
dsentkerDaniel S (http://gravatar.com/dsentker) says:

Love your post, many points are so true. Additionally, as a german i can say that we are a very
pessimistic, although there is no need for it.
Demortuus says:
This was hilarious! I burst out laughing more than once or twice. I agree with most if it,
especially the bank thing. Just recently my banker pestered me weekly to come in and confirm
my situation (I own shares, so apparently they wanna hold client contact). I just couldnt make
it because of their business hours. So i finally went on my week off. If they could just shift their
hours maybe 2-3 hours, everyone would be happy. But then again they would be home late
and that would be unacceptable.
Like some people already wrote, I cannot agree with you on Hasslehoff. Absolutely no one
talks or even thinks about him. And even if we do, you can almost be sure we are drinking and
making fun of baywatch. Really, since Knight Rider isnt screening on any main TV Channel
anymore, I never heard anyone mention Hasslehoff in a serious conversation.
Im from Bielefeld btw. you may have heard from it (or not) as it technically does not exist. In
addition we apparently harbor Michael Jackson, John F. Kennedy and a few others in our non-
existent underground Lab. Also known as the Bielefeld Verschwrung.
You may wanna visit here sometime, as its really close to Mnster and if you need a guide, Ill
be happy to help
caroline @trend-daily (http://trend-daily.blogspot.com) says:

How completely hilarious-I havent got time to finish the list so Im going to print it off and
show it to my German mum too!!! (even she manages to have a good laugh about some of the
things we see over there, but then again she has lived in England 40 years longer than she did
in Germany!) Dont know if I dare do one about us Brits? Maybe in private at first!!
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Karsten says:
Great list. For some habits a view from the ouside is necessary. Often I nodded in agreement
but I wouldnt have noticed this.
Greetings from Mnster, Piusallee123, first floor, right.
Karsten

18 June, 2012 at 5:42 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
Ahhh! How did you find the blog? Wonderful! I hope all is well on Piusalle, I miss that
street.
Karsten says:
It was linked on westline.de. While reading, I thought that must be you:-)
Scholar Mel says:

I am an American who lives in Germany and have never seen a biscuit. Great write up though.

No, not an American biscuit, an English biscuit a cookie!
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Chris says:
5 July, 2012 at 1:43 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-germans/what-i-
As a German let me just point out that every single point in this list is absolutely, irrefutably
and 100% true.
Thx for the laughs!
Colin (http://www.youtube.com/user/colbarth) says:

7 July, 2012 at 12:36 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-germans/what-
I found out about the Germans inability to Que the hard way when trying to board the bus !
Some how I was pushed right to the back of the Que ! also here the Germans dont stand up
while the bus is still moving they wait until the bus stops before disembarking . In England it
was common practice to stand up well before the bus reached the bus stop !
feli says:
In a full bus its sometimes impossible to stand up early, cause noones moving out of your
way. Well, Germans on a public transportation are just horrible. So glad when I can afford
my own car ;D
Liv says:
Hahahahaha true! No one moves! Unless they need to get off, then its every man for
himself (including on the DB)!
cchh says:
Actually Dinner for one is a production of the northern german television and Miss Sophies
Birthday is on Dec. 31st.
snookerinberlin (http://gravatar.com/snookerinberlin) says:

This list is great. It had me giggling the whole way through, everything is sooo true!
Please do come to Berlin for WEBMU in September, I would LOVE to meet you.

I so would have loved to but I am back in Sydney for a few months! Next year for sure!
Andreas says:
30 August, 2012 at 8:15 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
about #60, have you ever heard the term Feuerwehrmarmelade?

Is that Fireman jam??????
Andreas says:
its actually raw hamburger meat topped with onion, Its a widely common snack on
volunteer firemens events. So it is literally the Firemans Jam. Some also say Mett

13 September, 2012 at 7:04 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-
Ahhhhhh yes, I am familiar with mett. My mortal enemy. I dont think I will ever be
able to accept it as a viable meal option.
feli says:
Mett is a thing you can only love or hate. There are also Germans who dont touch it
(like me).
ulrike weywoda says:

It used to be called Tartar, Metwurst is something different, or at least it used to be a

spreadable sausage.

No! Fire department jam. Sounds Bad?
Ingrid says:
I really love this list! I agree with most comments except I do not all the cheese-sauces. Maybe
it is because I am a tomato-sauce fan! I am a middle-aged (north) German woman and I
have been in contact with many foreigners in my life, especially Americans. They have made
me aware of many of those things on the list, which the average German would not notice or
even question. I have got to like the more American-relaxed-way, especially when it comes to
clothing. Dont dare to go out in sporty clothes in a Sunday here it is very silly in my view!
Honor the Sunday, it is Church-Day! Well, to whom, these days? The majority of Germans are
not religious anymore. I also do not like the German way of starring at people, becaus it really
IS RUDE!..and makes other people very uncomfortable. Often I get into a conflict about certain
traditions and parts of the mentality hereespecially when it comes to dependability because
it can put a lot of pressure on a person but on the other hand make one feel rather secure!
Depending on the circumstances. Anyway, I like to call myself a European or even a
Weltbrger rather than a German I truly believe in a common Europe!
KEEP IT UPthis list is very goodnicely written as well! Congrats!
feli says:
Haha, the staring. I just remembered I once had a staring duel with a stranger on the bus.
Our eyes crossed and we kinda started staring at each other grumpily until he cracked and
then we both started laughing. Never talked thou, since we were on opposite sides of the
bus and left on different stations. So, maybe we have to take the staring thing with more
humor! xD
Liv says:
Youre definitely starers, it is something I still have to get used to. We bought a chilli plant
at the weekly farmers market in town a little while ago, and when we were carrying it
home, everybody stared. It was the first time my German boyfriend really saw how much
Germans stare. He was traumatised.
Elke says:
The staring thing is just not polite and, by the way, it is done all over the world, just
not so obviously. When I realise it, I ask may I help your and things are good.
Maybe its just our way of small talk?
I was tought to look into peoples eyes when talking to them, a behaviour of mine that
sometimes is misunderstood by Germans, English, French, and so on people.
I love your blog you are so true! You obviously had your fun her and thats the best
of it.
Have you ever read Oh these English by George Mikes? And do certainly know Billy
Brysons books. To me, you are in the best society you ever could think of.
May I hug you?
By the way, I found the link in a forum, Brigitte you certainly know the magazine-
Elke says:
sorry I forgot:
I do stare, too but mostly with a (hopefully) humorous or earnest or apriciatory
resp. silly remark. I this small talk?
Liv says:
I love the idea that staring could be your small talk fascinating possibility!
I do love Bill Bryson, I actually started reading him quite late, when I was laid up in
hospital and his was the only book around. Hes a very funny man.
And yes, you absolutely may hug me!
michelle says:
7 September, 2012 at 1:14 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
just great, and so true even from the eyes of a berlin girl

Glad you liked it! Quick question, how did you find the list?
sarahsberlindiaries (http://sarahsberlindiaries.wordpress.com) says:

Several months after reading this for the first time, it still cheers me up. Back in boring old
England now and these little snippets of German life are just what I need! Thanks!
Isa says:
You have undoubtedly scanned this old hat: http://store.hipstery.com/blogs/news/6877137-how-

to-be-german-in-20-easy-steps-part-2 (http://store.hipstery.com/blogs/news/6877137-how-to-be-
german-in-20-easy-steps-part-2) And please elaborate on Stefan Raabed-of-a-laugh, for the love
of God (haha). Even when I read your list many moons ago, it was old hat, but still funnybut
required some padding out. Adams pipping you to the post now. Get a move on with your
book How to be a good German, or whatever its gonna be called. Infuriating or what.

Who is this thunder stealer??
Isa says:
Adam Fletcher. Click on the link.

I did, I did, seems he knows the Germans pretty well too.
Isa says:
Have you seen the merchandise hes pushing as well?

http://store.hipstery.com/products/how-to-be-german-t-shirt
(http://store.hipstery.com/products/how-to-be-german-t-shirt) @adamfletcher

Innnnteresting. Have you any idea if WIKAG was on a Facebook page recently, have
had a fair bit of Facebook traffic over the past few days.
Isa says:
Oh I get, I think. Like, doh. You lot must be in cahoots. Semi-good money-making scheme:
berlinblog, hipstery, and you. Hats off I cant wait to see people those t-shirts!

Hahahaha no, no tee shirts happening over here, no cahoots either!
Isa says:
Nah, not much of a facebooker, I havent seen the wikAG. I only know that one of my
mates shared hipsterys link. But Id checked it a couple of daze ago, couldnt be arsed
commenting then, though. Today, Ive been, dare I say it, busy writing inciteful
comments. It was fun

writing inciteful comments brilliant.
Isa says:
Not in cahoots? For fs sake that T-shirt crap was bound to happen some time. Theres
an fn t-shirt for every thing, and a bag. Quite crappy, really. I mean, theyre not even that
good, in my not so humble opinion. What else could be done? Too many ideas, too little
time, or money, either way, time is money, or is it the other way round ;). Plates. Ties.
Socks. Caps. The list is endless. Watches. Tea towels. Key rings. Stop. No more
merchandise.
Isa says:
Pt 1 http://venturevillage.eu/how-to-be-german-part-1# (http://venturevillage.eu/how-to-
be-german-part-1#) but Im sure youve already found it.
Funky dude says:

I am not sure about some statements, but in Germany the average work 40,6h/week, so way
more then most countries in Europe If they have such a strong economy it is because they
exploit people. Germany doesnt have a minimum wage! Also they still produce a lot and that
they just can afford because they can pay 5-6/h a person.
A lot of what you write is simply european not german.
German beer is disgusting dude, everybody knows that in Europe.
Jim Vickers says:

Fortunately, you are wrong German beer is great!
Liv says:
German beer is fantastic! Did I say otherwise?
Biene says:
I am a German living in the USA for the past 21 years. And i do agree German Beer is
fantastic !!!. I drink Wahrsteiner (dunkel) i did while living in Germany and i drink it
over here. A guess you cant change old habits lol.
There is no drinking Tapwater for me over here or back home in Germany.
I love this post a friend shared it on Facebook .
Liv says:
Lovely to hear, thank you!
tiny tine says:

3 July, 2013 at 11:10 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
German beer is really good.

German wine well it depends on the year and area.
Consuela says:
Really liked what you had to say in your post, What I Know About Germans | Liv Hambrett,
thanks for the good read!
Consuela
http://www.terrazoa.com (http://www.terrazoa.com)
Sade says:
9 April, 2013 at 3:44 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-germans/what-
Thank you for this laugh-out-loud article! As a laid-back American, married for two years to a
no-nonsense, non flipflop appreciating German, I have cried in frustration more that laughed
in sheer joy since I moved to Germany. Spelling out so many of the German idiosyncracies, as
you have, reminds me why I love this country and its people!
Liv says:
You are so welcome! An illustrated e book with 20 more points is due out soon, keep your
eyes peeled!
Liz R (http://gravatar.com/lizrainey217) says:

As a German/American whos lived in the US since 1979, you made me miss my old country.
My very German traits are often misunderstood here in the States, and even have caused my
much younger and un-worldy boss to fire me, but I would not change it for anything. Thanks
for a very accurate, humorous, tolerant and caring depiction of the people and customs in my
native country.
travelangels (http://travelangels.wordpress.com) says:

Liz, many greetings to the States, as a German living in Greece, I couldnt agree more! what
a well observed description of us, wherever we are, and wherever we come from, we
should never forget our roots!
Liv says:
Yassu! Tikanis? Whereabouts in Greece do you live? I love the Germans and I love the
Greeks how did you wind up being a German in Greece? And it is true, we must never
forget those roots (mine are still in the red soil of home.)

Kala evxaristo!! I live in Athens, happily married to a Greek for 22 years, I do enjoy
reading your blog very much and when you come back to Greece with SG please let
me know!

viele Gruesse aus Athen!
Liv says:
You are so welcome. I think there are such clear cultural differences between where I come
from, (and the Brits, the Americans and other English speakers) and the Germans, its
fascinating. Took me a while to get used to the butting of heads and the different ways we
both have of doing/saying/being but I do love the Germs, youre good people.

so are you Aussies :)) always so happy and positive, its amazing!!
Markus says:
#99 (Germans cant queue): When I grew up in Germany, I specifically remember my English
teacher telling us that the British can queue really well! So I heard that exact point the other
way around.
As a German immigrant to the United States, I enjoyed reading this whole list very much, and I
shared it on Facebook. I have also printed it and will give it to my American wife to read, so
she can understand my idiosyncrasies even better. Thank you!
Liv says:
Hahaha, the British PRIDE themselves on queuing, it is a national past time! I have a drop of
that British blood in me, so I appreciate a nice queue in a shop or in front of an information
desk. The Germans just stride on in and up to the desk and order. It drives me crazy! So glad
you enjoyed the list, and thank you for sharing (and commenting.)
feli says:
The problem is even if you want to be polite and queue, people will just run in front of
you and youll end up waiting forever. I was a very shy person with stuff like this for a
long time but someday I just said to myself get used to the Ellenbogen-Mentalitt
(which means poking you ellbows into other peoples ribs to get in front, dont know if
theres an english word) and now Im just as rude as the others, except when I see
someone shy trying to queue.
Liv says:
I push now too! And if a damn kasse opens up next door, and I am halfway down the
line, I run to that kasse and get there first! It is so horrible and something you would
get slammed for doing back home, but you gotta do what you gotta do!
Once, I was in a long line at a cafe, and someone pushed in to look at the sandwich
cabinet and then went to order. A lovely stranger came to my rescue and said this
lady was first who did the customers get angry at? Me and the kind stranger. For
thinking there was a queue. Man.
S says:
Very true Love it! Only two things missing for me: 1st Germans love the police, especially
using it as a threat or calling it for any (and I mean any!) percieved disturbances
2nd Also related to police, Germans dont like noise very much and it is likely that the police
will knock on your door if the neighbours find your music is too loud. It is called
Ruhestrung dont even know how to translate this into english
Liv says:
Yes! They do not like noise, very true. I always forget vacuuming shouldnt be done on a
Sunday, or after a certain hour in the evening. I guess Ruhestrung would be disturbing the
peace in English.
Sascha says:
This ist brilliant!
Cheers from Germany (too hot)
Liv says:
Danke! (today it is too humid)
please-accept-my-need-for-online-privacy says:
About #130: Dont forget Winterdepression and Sommerloch. Weve got nothing for fall,
thoughyet
Liv says:
I reckon, given a bit of time, youll come up with something!
please-accept-my-need-for-online-privacy says:
Your list was the main topic today at work. Thank you for portraying us in such a positive
manner. Im not used to that, its nice for a change.
Liv says:
Thank you for your kind words and for enjoying the list.
Anna K. says:
This list cracked me up, thank you very much for this well written report about Germans.
Most of whose points are really true, especially about small talk, beer, cars, weather and
Deutsche Bahn!
Very mixed (from too rainy&cold till too bloody hot) greetz from Germany!
Liv says:
Thank you!
Andreas says:
Greetings from Saxony

What a great list, thanks for that look at us germans from a foreigner. Its so funny AND true!
But, seriously, i never want to live another way
Two weeks ago i travelled with 3 friends through scotland. We visited a castle an had to buy a
ticket. There were 2 queues and when it was our turn we order one after another our tickets
fast, as always. Its normal for us, but the ticketseller shook his head and smiled. He said
Germans, always efficient!
Sry for my bad english
bbriley (http://becomingriley.wordpress.com) says:

Well I am german and I believe you couldnt have nailed it better.
Liv says:
Das freut mich!
Berliner Goere says:

Awsome list! And most of it is so true! It always drives me mad when theres a long line in a
supermarket and -finally- they open a new one and other people run for it and get there first!
And after living for over 10 years in the US, I have to say that the we Germans are the 2nd
rudest people! Most of my friends say that the American way of greeting is false, but what is so
bad about asking someone how they are and wishing them a great day with a smile? And say
Excuse me when passing a person? Or help a mother in a bus with her stroller? Most of the
time she either has no space for the stroller, because the busses are overcrowded,or she
doesnt even get on it.and nobody helps her to get on or off.(and Im only speaking for
Berlin)
I had to laugh about Stefan Raab, but can not agree with Hasselhoff! Nobody likes him!
About the flip-flops: I think it is illegal now to even drive with them, because they are a
driving hazard! (at least that what my mom told melol)
And yes, we do love Hackepeter (ground raw pork)! And you can even buy it mixed with raw
beef! Americans scream:Food contamination! about that!
And I do miss the German bread and rolls! And the first thing I always eat when Im back in
Germany is a Doener!
Liv says:
Hurrah, thrilled you love it. Come onnnn, David Hasselhoff sneaks onto radio, into parties
and conversation here a LITTLE bit more than he does in other countries. But I genuinely
think you guys celebrate him completely wickedly and not at all seriously. As for the
queueing thing and the kasse RUSH watching people from the back of the line GALLOP to
the new kasse, while my arms are burning from holding 4 litres of milk, makes me SO
wtend!
As an Aussie, the Hellohowareyou greeting is absolutely par for the course and I miss it a
little bit, a naaaa, wie gehts dir? always wants to drop from my lips here, after a hallo!
but that would just be too weird!
Anna K. says:
I visited Australia 6 times and every time I was stuck after the how are you? -question
from strangers. Especially at cash points, till I asked one young man back Do you really
wont to know it? His face I will never forget his face!
Another thing is nice to met you. Me: Hi, my name is Anna stranger: Liz, nice to
met you me: (???) Please tell me what you reply to nice to met you???
Markus says:
After moving from Germany to the United States, I had the same issue with both for a long
time. After a while, it became second nature to respond with Im fine, how are you ? for the
first, and Nice to meet you, too for the second.
tiny tine says:

3 July, 2013 at 11:01 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-germans/what-
I am german and I had a good laugh when I read this post. As a matter of fact it made me kind
of home sick. I live in the US now and while I do not agree with all points I think you are spot
on with others.
Also GERMAN BEER IS GREAT I miss drinking something that doesnt taste like water with a
hint of beer flavor. And it is true I used to love to put Banana Juice into my beer lol
There are so many funny german comedians these days but I guess a lot of the humor gets lost
in translation.
Thank you for keeping it light and amusing to read.
Brigitte says:
19 October, 2013 at 8:02 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
141 ist einfach FALSCH.

A German would never mix the Hausschuhe with the Gartenschuhe. We have a pair of each.
Silvi says:
WORD!
Liv says:
Danke! Quick question do you mind telling me how you found this article?
feli says:
Theres also lots of people who have guest-Hausschuhe. We dont want our guest to get cold
feet but street shoes dirty the floor! ^^
Merlin says:
101. is because we have a party game, were each bottle must be opened with a different
device. Its real fun. ^^
Liv says:
So thaaaaats the reason!
Melani says:
I am a chronic dancer. It is my life passion and addiction and sadly 53 just BREAKS my heart to
pieces. I have been living in Freiburg for 3 years and good dancers are almost extinct species,
unless you go to a special course. And even there you can automatically distinguish a German
from basically any foreign dancer.
Please give me some hope. Is there a place in Germany where people can actually dance like
for real.
Liv says:
Bless them. I love watching TV shows like The Voice, where the audience has to dance and
move Germans have so much passion for it, but absolutely no rhythm, and my German
boyfriend heartily agrees.
Sebastian Felzmann (https://www.facebook.com/felzmann) says:

Youve nailed it! Im a compassionate dancer but not a very skilled one My wife is
always saying: Youre dancing to a beat that no one can hear but you! Being German
means that you will NEVER ever catch a fine sense for rhythm but hey, were almost 82
Mio people, so we will never notice if were not abroad
Liv says:
And it is the German dancing passion that I so appreciate. The clapping, the stamping,
the jumping you guys just get right in there!
shotbyscott (http://www.scottlewisphotography.eu/) says:

HI from fellow Antipodean in Deutschland .. I didnt see the word Tartort mentioned once.
You know you have been eingedeutscht when you cant wait from Sunday night.
Liv says:
Hahahaha its true! I think I have managed to only ever catch 2 episodes of that show (I am
a Fake German!)
Stefan says:
You might wanna add something about cars:
Germans NEVER lean or sit on cars that arent their own. If you do it in front of a German, it
will trouble him deeply (but he will probably not say anything). Touching someone elses car is
clearly invading privacy.
Liv says:
Fantastic addition! I had no idea, but it makes complete sense you guys and your cars,
man oh man.
Monny says:
that reminds me to a wedding I was invited to. I went outside for a smoke, leaned to my
vehicle and suddenly had a bunch of kids round me asking s this yours?. Well, Land
Rovers are not that common here in Germany, so my old piece of crap is a rare breed
here. Also its not shiny nor clean and has some (ok, a lot) dents from offroading. Soon
the kids were climbing all on to the Land Rover and had great fun because they were
NEVER allowed to climb on their dads car.
Then one horror-stricken dad arrived and ordered his kids to come down
IMMEDIATELY! Ill never forget his face when Im told him that I allowed them to climb
onto the Landy
Yes, I am german
Liv says:
Hahahaha, love it!
Monsterkater says:
Its not only the privacy thing, its also because if you sit or lean on it with
something metallic you could accidentally scratch the paint. Therefore it would
have to be repainted and in order for it to be neat, the wohle body part would have
to be re-done. Which can easily get expensive, especially on an expensive car. And
because insurance companies rarely pay this (because they say its willful
negligence or gross negligence) a German would be scared to lose a lot of money
only because he leaned or sat on somebody elses car.
Great list btw, had trouble not to laugh, and sooo true! Greetings from
Frankfurt/Main.
Liv says:
Aaahhh good point re cars and paint work. And very glad you enjoyed the list!
Ana says:
Very true. Another thing I noticed while going out, is that they love Michael Jackson (it seemed
to be always at least one Michael Jackson song in the clubs) and David Hasselhoff.
And some of my German friends dont seem to understand why, if we already made a plan, we
should not follow it? Even though, there might be a good alternative that popped out last-
minute, we should stick to the plan.
They love to drive fast and they do it well.
In Munich, it is so peaceful, the police might be very bored (except during the Octoberfest) that
they gave a 50 euro fine to a friend because he was riding his bike too fast, he wasnt as fast
as a car, but they didnt care.
Walking around the park, my friends did not let me cut an apple from a tree (because the
apple tree is from the government, they were afraid it was not legal?) but then on the next
corner, there were 4 people completely naked, enjoying the sun so you cant eat apples that
are not yours, but you are allowed to get naked wherever/whenever you want! And this is also
not a problem in mixed Saunas.
And in several occassions I saw a lot of very drunken Germans at 3am, buying tickets to get the
ubhan home (when they could easily just drive without paying)
Ana says:
and, it would not be Christmas without the song of Wham, Last Christmas
Markus says:
Yes, Germans and cheesy songs! Im a German immigrant to the United States. My
American wife is really amused by that. In fact, the first time I took her to Germany, she
got to watch the Eurovision song contest. Talk about cheesy songs! Another point to add:
Germans take the Eurovision song contest very very seriously.
While we were in Germany at that time, we were watching a Tatort episode, and they
were showing a customer in Frankfurts red-light district getting what he paid for. So
here we were sitting in the room with with my parents/her in-laws, watching a very racy
scene. She is quite open-minded when it comes to that, especially for an American, but
that made even her blush. Of course the acceptance of nudity on German TV is on the
list.
Liv says:
Classic German TV, bit of a nudity here and there at about 7pm. It always makes me
laugh and I notice it because Australia is a no nude zone until after 10pm (I think) and
all swearing is always bleeped. German TV feels sooooo relaxed in comparison, we are
such prudes!
Liv says:
Radio gets eeeeven cheesier at Christmas!
Liv says:
Verrrry true re Michael Jackson. And the ticket buying when drunk, s. Australians
would never do it, were too sneaky.
You may enjoy this post it is EXACTLY your apple nudity theory!
http://www.livhambrett.com/2011/12/14/bist-du-blind/
(http://www.livhambrett.com/2011/12/14/bist-du-blind/)
Mandy says:
Hi Liv,
just wanted to let you know that this list really made me laugh. I am german, living in
Australia and I really found parts of myself here. Great observation and summary. Socks and
Sandals hilarious and shocking at the same time. But the truth for many of us, especially
older generations :D.
By this time I learned to wear thongs at least 3/4 of the year and show my feet openly.
Reading this makes me think of going home, put on some boots and a big fat jacket (I am afraid
I wouldnt survive the german winter anymore) and have a beer and a bratwurst, or 5 ;o). Or
by this time a Gluewein.
Lots of fun further on.
Liv says:
I am so proud of you that you show your feet, and probably always have Barf, oder? I
hope youre loving Australia and not finding the warm Christmas too strange!
feli says:
Im laughing really hard right now. As a German I can say that this is pretty accurate! I love
that its not only the normal cliche.
But theres one thing: Many female Germans arent so fond of football, cars and beer (in that
order). Id say 50% of the women roll their eyes when the guys start again with those topics. ^^
And the queue thing is so true. I absolutely hate it how stupid people in Germany are about
this. Its especially annoying at bus stops. They just refuse to be logical and let passengers get
OUT of the bus first, so that theres more room to get INSIDE.
Wearing socks with sandals should be illegal. xD We had one teacher, who wore sandals with
socks the whole year round, even when it was snowing. And it were always really ugly socks
in s**t-brown or puke-green.
The punctuality isnt something were born with but our mother tend to yell for hours if were
late just 5 minutes xD At least thats my reason why Im not tardy (very often).
And hush about the DB thing! Dont tell our secret! Nooo! How could you! Noone must know
damn xD
MD says:
Very good list indeed.
However, one more thing we germans love doing is the following:

Instead or in addition to greeting someone we (once) slowly nod our heads at each other. Seing
this almost every day. Even I do it a lot
Liv says:
Hahahahaha yes, I noticed the other day someone greeted me with a VERY quiet Servus
and a long, slow nod. And absolutely not a trace of a smile.
fioramiriel says:
Also: Garbage seperation (Mlltrennung) is something, that German people do more
extensively than any other country Ive ever been in.
Liv says:
YES! I feel like I live with a hundred bins, and our weekly recycling run is so efficient.
Daniel says:
I really enjoyed reading this list!

I as a german can relate to many of my friends or families I know when laughing about
something you wrote! Great job!
Some things really depend on the part of Germany you are visiting, but a high amount of
people do really (like) what you wrote. I read one persons reply here, where he or she
wondered that they were not allowed to get an apple from a tree, which could have been
owned by the government, but a few steps away, people were allowed to be naked.
You cant be naked everywhere you want to be, but there are many special places where you
can take your clothes off or you can do it on your private ground
neureality says:
switzerland: how exactly did u come to the terribly wrong conclusion that our tages-anzeiger
is the national newspaper?(just to let u know, there is no such thing as a national paper
first because there are quality newspapers and rainbow press onessecond because we got 4
official languages of which 3 are widely spoken and many italian or french speaking ppl wont
understand german well enough to read a newspaper
Liv says:
Ah, thanks for the tip, I must have been wrongly informed. I do know it has a pretty
readership and for many of us monolingual countries, a paper with that size readership
would tend to get lumped into the national paper family. But of course, that doesnt take
into account the other national languages and speakers. Point taken!
neureality says:
it does indeed but it is sort of battling with a second widely read paper called the neue
zrcher zeitung (nzz)those are the two quality newspapers that have the biggest run in
the GERMAN speaking part of our countrynow for the italian and french speaking parts
(notably smaller than the german part even if u take french and italian as one) there are
different onesand then there is the analog to what u certainly know from germany
(bild) which is called blick and most likely has a bigger readership than the quality
newspapersactually i guess the two free papers called 20minuten and blick am abend
distributed widely all over and even written in french (at least 20minuten) are the ones
with the biggest runto me they do not fit the same category as tages anzeiger and nzz,
thoutheyre reduced to what u can and want to read on ur morning commute to work
and theyre more kinda rainbow press as blick is(blick am abend is a derivate of blick)
foksy says:
oh great another one of thoseim gonna pretend im really special by posting 100 stereotypes
about a country based on my experience in four towns i have been to. seriously i dont wanna
be rude but if you really think our economy is running great because of our punctuality than
you reallysorryare an idiot. how so many of the factory workers are foreigners, working
their ass of because too many germans are too good for that? how come they get paid shit
compared to people who sot in offices all day long. it sounds like you just mashed up a bunch
of strereotype rap into another blogpost. you know maybe u should walk around with your
eyes open, and maybe you should get out of your world and speak to some people that arent
in your super duper comfort zone. speak to people in the street, to artists, to musicians, to
people who have no job, go to the east of germany and have a look around theremaybe youll
discover that there is a world beyond your perfect stereotypical german RTL view. blog posts
like this make me sad. oh yeah, i am german, btw
Liv says:
Hey Foksy, thanks for your comment. I get youd be frustrated on the basis that, no, this list
isnt particularly deep or comprehensive. The list is mostly a bit of fun, and was written
with a lighter-hearted approach to knowing Germany in mind it certainly wouldnt stand
up to much academic testing! (And no, I wouldnt say your economy is purely down to your
punctuality, that would be a little too simple, wouldnt it?) I suppose I can only write about
what I see, and what I have seen has been limited to where Ive lived and travelled. Lord
knows there is so much more to see and do and learn about this country, and I very much
look forward to it. Thanks again for your comment, all feedback greatly valued.
Markus says:
My dear friend, please lighten up. This is a list of stereotypes. As such, it doesnt apply to all
Germans, but its not wrong. As a first generation German immigrant to the U.S., I find this
list hilarious. And I would find such a list just as funny if a German wrote it about
Americans (it probably already exists somewhere). For example, if that list includes that
Americans like to drink beer, own guns, drive pickup trucks, and yell Yee-Hawww, it would
by far not apply to every American. But I dont have to go far into the countryside from
where I live (in Charlotte, North Carolina), until I find folks where all of the above is true.
Yes, true Rednecks do exist. Thats what makes this so funny.
Teo says:
come on, dont be so negative. Each country has its dark side, and I must say I am quite
happy for living in Germany, it could have been worse. Now to your point regarding the
factory workers and people who have no jobs, I was raised with the mentality that you are
paid depending on the education and the studies you have, which isnt quite unfair. You can
only have a small number of jobs for artists etc. if too many want to be an artist, of course
many will end without having a job. But this is in every country the same, not only in
germany, so dont be so pessimistic, enjoy the good things.
Kisa says:
I am actually dying of laughter Im german and find it quite refreshing to read such a
stereotype list from another anglekind of other angle I want mooore *grins*
Liv says:
Dont you worry, as long as I am here, this list will continue to grow!
Stefan says:
haha, its quiet funny.
And here i thought im fully german. xD

Well, now i learned again something about the people in my country. xD
Liv says:
Only now can you officially call yourself a German.
Thomas H. says:
Its hard to hear so often wed like Hasselhoff; I never heard a song of him in radio and hes
very rare in TV; I really hate the connection to him
There are a few more points i do not agree / at all / but most of points are true and funny
Liv says:
I know, the Hoff divides people he is a contentious point!
gina (http://gravatar.com/gmperkins) says:

in my experience, Germans have NO sense of humor! that and they are generally unhelpful.
They keep to themselves and dont help strangers without being directly asked.
Liv says:
Oh noooo, I am sorry youve found that. Although you are right, they do tend to keep to
themselves when out in public, and more often than not, you do have to ask for help.
Teo says:
as a german, i cant agree with the sense of humor, we definitely have one, but its quite
different in comparison to other countries. but we really are unhelpful, i dont even
know why, a friend of mine told me, that she was very surprised when some girls in her
architecture lecture didnt know how to use certain machines and expected that
everywhone would rush to their aid. I think germans, generally dont like to interact with
other people they dont know in public places.
Liv says:
Teo, youre onto something. I have discussed before, with German friends of mine, about
why Germans tend to keep to themselves unless directly approached. I remember one
(extreme) situation on a bus, when I first got here, when a woman was hugely distressed
and absolutely no one came to help her, except for one girl, after about ten minutes. The
bus driver didnt even blink. I had no German at that point, so couldnt do a thing. I was
struck by how little everyone interacted. Obviously there are loads of people who would
help and do talk to strangers, but generally, Germans do keep to themselves in public, I
agree!
Franzi says:
thanks for making me smile! i havent been home in 1.5 years so your post brought back a lot
of memories.oh the jack wolfskin jackets and the fog machines! lol
Liv says:
I am glad it could be a little reminder of home!
Sonja (http://www.toeuropewithkids.com) says:

Ive joked about these things all my life, and to see them in print is hilarious. Thank you! Id
like to add a couple observations of mine: 1) Germans blame a lot of ailments (dizziness,
fatigue, headaches) on Kreislauf WTF? and 2) they think that drinking an ice cold beverage
will get them sick. Oh, and driving in an air conditioned car too long will also get them sick.
Liv says:
Hahahahaha, love it. So true. And extended periods of open windows = instant illness.
lauren.ok@hotmail.com says:
This is great! I lived in HH and noticed all of these How I miss those Germans!
Liv says:
Oh I love HH a wonderful city!
Lind says:
It doesnt surprise me that the author would struggle with the notion that not all cultures
abuse alcohol (points 49 and 50)? ..and no, its not because ..Germans start drinking young.
Germans consume alcohol in moderation, something people from binge-drinking cultures (the
author) finds peculiar and attempts to rationalise to themselves.
Liv says:
tis true! Younger generations of Australians do tend to binge drink, quite like many other
cultures, something we thankfully grow out of. I certainly wouldnt say, in my experience,
all Germans drink in moderation these Bavarians can put away the beers faster than I
can water. I also certainly wouldnt say Germans or Australians abuse alcohol as a rule
theres a difference between drinking a fair bit and abusing, wouldnt you say?
Lind says:
Thankfully, binge drinking is confined to the Brits and Aussies, so no, I dont agree its
..quite like many other cultures. As a demonstration, watch the Aussies in action at
Oktoberfest, its cringe worthy. Bavarians are not representative of all Germans, and
neither are some of the few you encounter.
Liv says:
Totally agree Aussies in action at Oktoberfest is not something anyone should ever
see!
weisecubez says:
This is easily one of the greatest things Ive read about us so far! And, aswell, a big thank
you! for not calling us Nazis. Id invite you to a lovely panned Bratwurst the next time you
stay here! Since then:
All the best!
Liv says:
Wonderful, I am so pleased you enjoyed it. And I always have time for a Bratwurst!
Rolf says:
Absolutely !
Frau Liv your blog is wonderful
As a German guy living in the US for the last 23 years I had to laugh out loud so many times
while reading your observations about our Teutonic Gestalt.
And yes, is there any other manor of wearing sandals socks are needed !!! Cant have those
feet visible to the world.
Oh ja, a Bratwurst would be great right about now ready to go sleep just now but would
always, always have time for a Bratwurst.
Oh the Hasselhoof or some such Name pardon me, I left that part back in Germany LoL
Again, Frau Liv my greatest respect for you unique perspective. It is a joy observing us
Germans through your eyes.
Good Night from Washington State
Liv says:
Thank you so very much, I love that it resonated with you. I can send a Bratwurst over to
you, for a morning snack!
Rolf says:
LOL you are too kind Frau Liv

Have a great Weekend
And to all Germans in Deutschland:
Juhu schoen, dass es euch gibt
izzy says:
For the first time in my life, I actually feel like a list has actually done us justice. (And yes, Im
German.) Thank you!!
Liv says:
Hurrah! Thank you!
Susan says:
Hilarious, love your list, except #104: Stefan Raab, I cant stand him.
And, according to your list, I am not really german
Liv says:
I feel Stefan is losing power. I may have to replace him with Gnther Jauch.
Ede Michael Frgut (https://www.facebook.com/michael.fuergut) says:

YESSSS!!! Gnther for president!
Liz (https://www.facebook.com/Lianinjapan) says:

Gosh, this is so sweet XD I dont like these prejudice stuff about Germany, Americans and so on
because its always the same shit and mostly too old to be true. People change, nations change
and your lovely posting is just so refreshing. Thank you for sharing this with us! Im proud to
be German, we have our positive and negative points (as every nations has) and your funny
and lovely style of writing makes me so happy!
Liv says:
Wonderful to hear, thank you so much.
herr stiller (http://feiyeahabend.de) says:

<3
Bunde says:
Absolutely great! As I was born near to Mnster, living there for a few years during my time
at the university and now living in Bavaria (Munich) I can approve (almost) every single
point! THX!
Liv says:
Phew, you have travelled my path too, that makes me feel better!
Liv says:
Dankeschn!
Chuck says:
I have heard, but cant verify, that the American sitcom, Hogans Heroes, had enjoyed some
popularity, after inserting footage of a nude housekeeper for Col. Klink.
Liv says:
Hahaha, I will have to look into this.
Stefan says:
That`s true
Liv says:
Pleased to hear it!
Marty Pole says:

Liv, hiIm not sure if youve realized what you kicked loose with this observationbut by
now you probably do!! This is darling, hilarious, a pisser and just so trueand yes aside from
Sitzfleisch and Schadenfreude, I think you have covered all the bases and then some;)
Great workgreat observationkeep it up!
From an expat who emigrated over 20 years agoand has that thing on his mindperhaps on
a daily basisif not so, at least every other or every other family vacation, business call and
inner conflicts:)
Marty from NYC
PS: I may distribute this to my US and expat friends in my inner circle with your blessing?..
Liv says:
Marty, go forth and distribute, thank you! As for not knowing what I kicked loose, my God, it
has been huge! The list first went viral about eighteen months ago and it was enormous.
This week, it has done it again. What I love, is that 99% of the feedback is a) from Germans
and b) so positive. It makes me very, very happy. I hope you can get your bratwurst and
pretzel fix in NYC (are the pretzels as good?)
walt says:
Must agree the author has been in Germany and apparently knows a few things. But, you
cannot full understand or know them until you marry one (if you marry two, you are
disqualified). Good following, though.:-)
Liv says:
Hahaha, I will try and aim for one and see if my knowledge deepens!
Corinna says:
So well observed!
Liv says:
Thank you!
Peter (http://www.peter-reimer.de) says:

*haha* I enjoyed reading this an old german saying:The one who made a journey is the one
to tell something. (Wenn einer eine Reise tut, so kann er was erzhlen. and if something
wont fit to my point of view about my home country and its great citizens, bullet 105 works
excellent for me
and thank you for mentioning some essential qualities about loyality and friendship, which I
think is one of the greatest quality of german people
Liv says:
I have to agree Peter, about the two of the greatest qualities of the German people. And
point 105 my God, drives me crazy. And I think Bavaria might be the guiltiest of them all,
with their thousands of regions and dialects!
Andrew says:
All sounds about right I was there the time the German mark went and the euro stayed .
Carlos says:
1. Germans are not tall. Go to Netherlands and compare.
Liv says:
True! And the Danes = very tall!
Morpho Portis (https://www.facebook.com/morphoportis) says:

Hahaha! Was laughing through most of this because its so true! Especially the point about the
DB and Stefan Raab! Hahaha!
Liv says:
Hahaha thank you!
Mark says:
No. 134? Seriously? I lived in Germany all my life and constantly struggle to find a public
bathroom, and when I finally do it is generally dirty beyond belief and (of course) without any
toilet paper. The only good ones are the self cleaning Sanifair ones
Liv says:
Oh nooooo I have (generally) always had a relatively good experience with public toilets!
Even if I have to pay, which I am happy to do, at least I know theyre spotless and therell be
toilet paper. I always compare them to public toilets in Australia (we dont have the Sanifair
thing) and Germany usually comes out on top I guess its all relative!
fwolf (http://ag8.alltagsgrauen.info/) says:

Note: PAID toilets are something totally different thou, eg. those run by some sub-sub-
sub-sub-sub-level company in German train stations. Those are always clean and nice, no
doubt about that.
cu, w0lf.
fwolf (http://ag8.alltagsgrauen.info/) says:

Same here. If you wanna have toilets to eat from (literally!), do a brief visit to (the Republic
of) Ireland. Even the nastiest smoke hole with puke in every corner will have squeaky-clean
toilet with LOTS of toilet paper, good smell, soap AND towels .. ha ..
But German public toilets? Or in pubs? Oh my .. to quote Mr. Takei.
cu, w0lf.
Ulrike Weywoda says:

I am German and have been living in America for over 40 years and in Germany for about 24.
Yes I occasionally get in trouble for being direct and I dont care for all the useless small talk,
especially at the cash register. Anyway, I love your blog it is very entertaining.I dont know if
everything is accurate as I have not been back since 2006. Flip-flops were not around in my
time there and nobody wore boots in the summer.
I would love to hear more of your observations and will send this to all my German friends
here in the US.
Liv says:
Hahaha I love that even 40 years in the states still hasnt changed your so very German
feelings toward small talk! Thank you so much for your comment, and for reading.
Barry says:
I worked with Germans for two years (Im an Aussie) and do you know what I noticed when I
read this list? Firstly, I agreed and laughed along with most of it, and secondly you failed to
mention the non-mentionability of the War in front of foreigners. Or how religious they are
super Catholic, or super Protestant or super atheist. They do not do their beliefs or non-beliefs
by halves!
Liv says:
Aussie Barry, hello. VERY true re the religious thing! Living in Bavaria right now, I hear
nothing but church bells. And how about the church tax! The war thing is interesting. I have
found younger generations are very open to discussing it I have had some great
conversations with my students about it and the baby boomers have a subset of people as
fascinated by the war as the rest of the world. That being said, I think they largely avoid
raising it because 99% of foreigners they come across raise it for them.
Hiram Ted Leza (https://www.facebook.com/htleza) says:

I lived in Germany for 12 years and this list is so complete and there are many truths. Loved
the list.
Liv says:
Wonderful to hear, thank you!
Tanja says:
As a German expat, living 30 years in Canada and Caribbean, your list made me homesick and
proud of being German! And, of course, it made me laugh! Thank you!
Liv says:
You are so welcome!
Susan (http://asia-corner.blogspot.jp/) says:

Oh my god I just looked at FB and saw this . and have been reading it until now ~ all the
comments and everything Its wonderful!!!
Im german and living in Japan for one month now~ I must admit queue isnt our thing but
the japanese people really mastered it! I like taking the train here people can get out savely,
no one rushes and everything^^
As for other things like most of them said Hasselhoff isnt that good anymore. We do know
the name, song and such, but we dont like him.
And yeah I love Gehacktes (mett or whatever), sauerkraut, Bratwurst and Kuchen <3 It's nice
to have friends come over for tea and cake.
Hmm tabwater now that I'm here I really miss our water. As a student we drink it more
often (cheaper) but for me, I like to use my Sodamax to make it sparkle <3 But like everything
else everyone loves it in another way ^-^
One point I didnt quite get was the thing about socks I know there are some older people
liking wearing socks and sandals (but this is strange in our eyes, too). But do you mean
wearing socks in general is bad? Its nice heaving them in a cold evening As for naked feet
theres nothing better than going "barfu" in hot summer in grass or on a good street. Often we
remove our shoes and just hold them in our hands while walking (if the street isn't dirty)
Oh and the walking thing~ I get asked by my students why we enjoy taking a walk etc but
isn't it relaxing and healthy, too? Just today I walked around in the neighbor hood to explore
the area
There's so much more, but I think I'm going to sleep now XDD
Thank you for this list, Liv. Have a nice week and I'm looking forward to hear more *^-^*
P.S.: Not just germans, but western people in general are tall ~ It's somehow frustrating when
all the people around you are smaller or the same height as you (and I'm just 1,70)
Anna K. says:
Often we remove our shoes and just hold them in our hands while walking (if the street
isnt dirty) Susan, you nailed it! If the street isnt dirty this is absolutely German! Cant
stop laughing
P.S.: Im only 1.65 cm, but in India a was a giant too.
karthikkk says:
Seriously! India with its 1.2 billion people and at 1.65 were a giant?
Liv says:
Thank you so much for your lovely comments thrilled you enjoyed the list!
And yes, I am 172, quite tall in my little Sydney circle, but here below average. Short
even!
Rinascinto says:
Wonderful list! Its quite interesting and shocking for me as a German to read that things like
lets say socks in sandals are NOT common to the rest of the world.
Why???
You are so right about the lack of the ability of queuing, especially as you describe the situation
when there is opened another checkout counter in the super-market. I feel embarrassed by the
truth of that observation, mostly because it seems to turn out the longing for justice that you
have also noticed as a German characteristic as a superficial thing.
But THANK YOU that most of your things are positive.
Liv says:
Not a problem! Most of my experiences here have been super positive I adore the
Germans and their way of doing things (even though sometimes they make me want to
scream hahaha, but I think thats what a healthy relationship is all about, right?)

I do remember the Queuing thing. My mother , 50 years ago remarked how disciplined the
Americans are in that respect which meant a lot coming from her since the GIs in general had
a bad reputation back then.
Sandals were never worn with socks in my 24 years in Germany and I dont think, looking at
photos, it was done in the Sudetenland where I am from.
Liv says:
Yes, the queuing thing is something that SHOULD come naturally to the orderly Germans
but it doesnt. Its this strange exception to the rule.

About being friendly or not, helpful or not. That is not at all how I grew up but I lived in the
city and I think that might make a difference, Ludwigsburg and Stuttgart to be exact. I thought
Americans were unfriendly and kept to themselves, for example, my American sister in law
once said, come over any time to visit, I did, and boy was everyone surprised to see me. It was
just a phrase I found out like hello.That was in Massachussetts, New Hampshire was even
worse.
Liv says:
Ahhhh, classic! The old throwaway comment us English speakers make that we dont
necessarily mean; we should have coffee! or drop by any time! But we dont mean it
literally. HORRIBLY confusing for cultures that would never say something they dont really
mean (Germans!).
Bettina @ Books, Bikes, and Food (http://booksbikesfood.com) says:

Fantastic post, especially the thing about the queuing. I never noticed it until my Spanish
boyfriend started complaining about it, and now it annoys the hell out of me. Its completely
bizarre that were so efficient at most things (with the additional exceptions of building train
stations and airports, apparently) but so ridiculously bad at this. A variant of it is going on an
escalator. That stand on the right, walk on the left thing really doesnt work in Germany!
The one thing dont get is the jaywalking though or am I living in a different country after
all? At least in Hamburg, everyone jaywalks. All the time. Theres one golden rule though:
dont do it in front of kids, because they cant tell when its dangerous. I find that attitude kind
of heartwarming actually!
Liv says:
The queuing! The elevators! The blocking of public paths because no one can walk in a
manner that acknowledges you are sharing the path with others! It goes against everything
the Germans are otherwise about (order, systems, efficiency)!
The jaywalking thing is different in big cities it seems to be more of a notable thing in the
mid sized cities and smaller towns, I think.
Monsterkater says:
Here in Frankfurt/Main, only the foreigners seem to have trouble with the escalator
thing, but in the rest of Germany I have noticed it, too.
As for the jaywalking, here we have something called Frankfurter Grn, if the lights
are red, but no traffic is close, you walk as if they were green. Especially true for
businessmen rushing to or from work.
Liv says:
I think the big cities tend to sneak a bit more jaywalking in than the smaller ones. I
watched two teens jaywalk yesterday and did the German shake of my head.
Sabine (http://bee_in_america.blogspot.com) says:

Its always quite interesting to read about the own culture and what weird habits people from
other countrys find in the way we Germans act. Your points of course doesnt fit for anybody
but are still correct. I really enjoyed reading your list, especially since I spend my current
school year in America and could also write a list about the habits of the American people.
You did a great job!
Liv says:
Oh would love to read your points on the Americans! Are they on your blog?

Would love to read your take on Americans, I could add a few tidbits.
Bike riding in America scares me, they ride on the wrong side of the road and do not
have lights! And I found that J-walking depends where you live, in some cities it seems
mandatory, in others you will get a ticket.
Taking your shoes off is something I never experienced in my 24 years in Germany but
there seems to be a big debate about this here in the US.
Jonathan Zerger says:

This is the truth and nothing but the truth. Put quite hilariously I might add. Being German I
see a lot of my culture in this and I laughed out loud a few times to the amusement of my
Aussie friends.
Liv says:
Wonderful, that makes me happy!
Jo RG says:
Head over to http://matadornetwork.com/abroad/how-to-piss-off-a-german/

(http://matadornetwork.com/abroad/how-to-piss-off-a-german/) for a comparable list, though
not quite as exhaustive.
Also would list as #142 that Germans would have by now checked #99 when reading #140 and
#123 when reading #141 respectively if the quoted context was correct.
You mention German never jay-walking, but what about those protesters who walked over
cars, when these cars were parked over the line or those playing inner-city golf in abandoned
industrial zones?
Liv says:
Yes, the How to Piss of a German list is good fun, and written by a very cool guy. Have you
seen his blog? http://www.slowtravelberlin.com/ (http://www.slowtravelberlin.com/)
AndrewF (http://aborrowedflame.com) says:

Amazing.
Also: There is a danger of getting sick from a slight (if not imagined) breeze of fresh air. While
smoking.
And the whole, bring your own house-shoes when youre visiting someone else..
Liv says:
Just in case the people youre visiting dont have the obligatory pack of house shoes for
guests!
J Floris Pepper (https://www.facebook.com/j.f.pepper) says:

Oh my God! Im busted xDDDD
Yes.we are germans and we hate small talk !!!
Liv says:
Ohhhh yes you do as the Germans always ask me, why talk when there is no point to it?
AndrewF (http://aborrowedflame.com) says:

Except, of course, for the obligatory hello & goodbye when entering awkward spaces like
lifts and saunas or sitting across from a stranger on the train the places where we
would never talk!
Liv says:
And doctors waiting rooms! That weird rule where you HAVE to say hello and
goodbye to EVERYONE who exits and enters. I remember thinking, and yet, you wont
have a chat to the person next to you in line for a coffee.
Horst says:
Groartig. Und so positiv
Liv says:
Dankeschn!
Paddii M (https://www.facebook.com/paddii.mo) says:

The accuracy of that list, I cant deal. Thanks for this :))
Liv says:
Haha, danke!
tobs (http://www.storyartist.de) says:

all my childhood i kept thinkingsomehow i am different. at the same time i have to admit:
you got me (even though i am neither tall, well groomed or particular puntual)
Liv says:
Hahaha, but I bet you love a wurst in a brtchen and started riding a bike before you could
walk.
Bianca Marschke-Kunz (https://www.facebook.com/bianca.marschkekunz)

says:
Nice list Though I can see well from which parts of Germany you got some
I am also German, and I lived pretty close to Mnster, the city full of students and bikes. You
might find some exceptions though when it comes to some points, e.g. the dachshund thing (I
really, really do not like these so much.)
Also yes, many Germans are punctual to the minute, but often only when it is really needed,
e.g. the job or university or the like. I know more people who tend to be not really on time. I
personally also dislike Stefan Raab and socks in sandals, eeewwww.
A lot of this is right though The real German Wurst is also another type Currywurst,
especially if you live in the Ruhrgebiet or Berlin. And Davis Hasselhoff is easily explained: his
song is connected to the fall of the Berlin wall in 1989, fondly remembered.
And why do we speak English so well? Simple: it is a mandatory subject at schools from age 10
onwards, at least until we are 15. It is in fact a main subject, and even though on German TV
most is dubbed, many watch the original versions, and many read books rather in English
than in German. For us, it is pretty easy to learn English as out languages are close enough to
find similarities.
I do not live in Germany anymore, I am only there from time to time nowadays. But one thing:
Austria is worse than German concerning churches >_>
Liv says:
I think if the Germans didnt sub their television, theyd be giving the Scandinavians a run
for their money with English! And I have heard a lot about how theoretical the English you
do at school is, so in my teaching experience Germans are generally quite concerned with
the grammar, but perhaps not as orally fluent/confident. Very interesting!
So true re Austraia and the churches! You are right!
Suzy Metzler (https://www.facebook.com/suzy.metzler) says:

Im half German and married a German, and I have to tell you, you have definitely included
everything I know about Germans my husband, his three brothers and his parents in your
writing! I love it!
Liv says:
Hahaha, fantastic!
BikerKerl Mario (https://www.facebook.com/BikerKerl) says:

funny, but sooo true- Im german
Liv says:
Thank you!
Hannah says:
I love your list. Its quite accurate
There is only one thing I am wondering about: Where are those jobs with short working
hours? And the government jobs where you dont have to work at all? They dont exist
anymore. The younger generation has to work longer hours for less money. And this is why the
German economy is doing well compared to the rest of Europe
Liv says:
Oh the government jobs was a bit of a jibe at some friends I know who seem to have an
awful lot of down time in their offices! And also I find the banks and Standesamts and
Rathaus opening hours a little frustrating!
DNK says:
It is not all that wrong actually.

I have a friend who works at the Bundesamt fr Justiz in our former capital city Bonn.
She earns almost twice the amount of money I earn while doing only half the work I do
(during reasonable hours, too, while I have to work a lot of overtime). We both have
equal education (graduated from the same university in the same field of studies) and
both work as translators. Though she only translates and proofreads whereas I am a
project manager with a lot of additional responsibilities besides translating and
proofreading.
So this statement is really not all that incorrect and I really had to giggle about it, because
I also used to think it wasnt trueuntil I experienced it first hand.
Liv says:
It seems when you work for the government (generally speaking) you are very well
looked after indeed!
Bratwurstessenderbiertrinker says:
Hi Liv,
being a German travelling a lot abroad, your list made my day. Actually, I have some
comments concerning your food topics:
Best Bratwurst in the world is from Nuremberg. But tell this to somebody e.g. in Thuringia.
He or she will start a big argument with you as best Bratwurst is a big thing in Germany
Dner is indeed typical German food. According to some sources, a guy called Kadir Nurman
invented the Dner in Berlin. He passed away this year 80 years old
You should also mention the pride of Germans about their local beers. This is another point
to start an endless discussion
Please go to one of the most favourite German holiday destinations: Mallorca. You will find
typical German food on every Menu in the main tourist destinations (e.g. El Arenal)
As I am on business trip in Arab countries I really miss my Bratwurst!
Good luck in Weiden and thanks for sharing further thoughts about Germany!
Nico
Liv says:
FUNNY you say that about wurst a few comments down, someone has claimed the worst
wurst are the Nrnbergers!
I am yet to go to Mallorca, but I have heard so much about it I dont know if I am brave
enough to check it out hahaha.
Felicitasz (http://felicitasz.blog.hu) says:

Hungarians also know the springtime fatigue (tavaszi fradtsg). We very possibly learned
about it from the Germans.
I love the post, it is SO TRUE.
Liv says:
Ooh! I wonder whether the Hungarians did actually get it from the Germans, or vice versa.
Or maybe in countries where these loooong, daaark, coooold winters happen, its a normal
thing!
Thomas says:
Hi Liv,
I am totally amazed how well you captured the German mentality and liked reading your
thoughts very much.
In order to be able to show this article the amount of respect it deserves

1) I copied and pasted it into a word file,
2) then adjusted the font to a standard 12-point Times New Roman,
3) put the whole thing in Blocksatz (naturally), activated the Silbentrennung (which I definitely
canNOT do without) and
4) set the Seitenrnder to a neat 2cm each. Finally,
5) I put the articles URL beneath (11-point TNR, italics, rechtsbndig) for completions sake.
Finished this task with a satisfied sigh, I might add.
Thank you!
P.S.: I CAN bloody well QUEUE if I see a sense in doing so, that is.
Liv says:
Hahahaha this comment has MADE my day. I have no doubt the list, in its new, ordered
form, would have felt so very treasured.
Patrick Hoenigk (https://www.facebook.com/patrick.hoenigk) says:

This list is awesome
Cheers for that. And the fact that we simply CANNOT queue is def. true & drives me MAD.
You have to watch out not to get killed when entering ANY public transport. Even Grandma
will push you outta the way like it was nothing. We also cannot seem to grasp the concept of
letting people OUT of the transport before entering ourself.noooo we have to stand right in
FRONT of the freakin door. I tell ya it drives me insane!
Liv says:
Oh my God, spot ON with the public transport thing. Everyone just rushes, and there ends
up being some sort of mass wrestling match in the doors as some try to exit and some try to
enter and NO ONE gives up.
timur hagen says:

I am a german and i almost died of laughter while reading this list!^^

Very keen observation of our social behaviour and culture. As a german i can explain why we
cant queue: You cant do it efficently! We race through supermarkets with premade shopping
list in a frightening effective way, sometimes i catch myself how at fast i am and try to slow
down and 10 seconds later im running again. Then you get to the queue and you have to stop.
Wait. Do Nothing! Very uncomfortable feeling for any german! ^^
my6gifts says:
Youre spot on with this list! We lived in Bamberg for 7 1/2 years, we just moved back to the U.S
last December (2012). I have to say the only thing Id disagree with is that in all our time a bus
was NEVER late and the train was only late once and that was after a train derailment, which
made for a VERY long ride home from LEGOLAND (many train switches and then a long bus
ride and not getting home until 3 AM).
I dont miss being shoved, although it most definitely became a part of life we were used to
and fell into!
Keep enjoying Germany for those of us who no longer are blessed to be there! Go have a doner
and brotchen!
Martin Busch says:

I (43 year old german) love the list! And just like mentioned I one of the points I can really
laugh about our odd habbits. Many things are so true: We are passionate about Bratwurst,
Bier, cars, soccer and Ikea :-). What else is important in this world??? :-). Prost-Mahlzeit!!!
Liv says:
Haha, now if I could just add to that list sunshine, beaches and long, hot summers, all would
be perfect (although you know what happens when the Germans are too hot? Enddddless
complaining.)
deininnererkompass (http://gravatar.com/deininnererkompass) says:

This list is awesome. Shared it with a lot of people this evening.
Germans, who live in small towns dont jaywalk. Thats true, its something I observed as
someone, who moved from a big town to a smaller one as well. Its annoyingbut you know
whats funny? We do it secretly sometimes. When there are no children around, who could see
us doing it. Because if there are children, ONE does not cross the street, if the lights are still
red
What strikes me, too is that Germans always tend to defend and explain themselves when it
comes to the topic of WWII. Im a young german and I dont really care about any of this
anymore. We were so stuffed with this topic in school that we dont feel like discussing it
anymore. These times are over, but we still feel like we have to defend ourselves for being
german. But that changes slowly, too.
PS: Klsch is the best beer

I came to Germany as an expellee from the Sudetenland in 1946. I went to a Volksschule,

then Gymnasium and last Hoehere Handelsschule. I did not hear anything in any of the
three schools about WWII. My parents only told me a few stories here and there, I had to
read about it on my own. However I always thought my generation had nothing to feel
guilty about and even those children who belonged to the Hitlerjugend did not, after all
they did not have a choice.
DerUmi says:
Ulrike, probably back then it was a taboo to talk about WWII, because it was too fresh. I
went to the Gymnasium in the 90s and WWII was a regular subject in some way in many
different classes, be it in German, English, History, Social Science, Ethics, Philosophy
classes. In history classes it went so far, that those 12 years out of 2000 years of German
history filled in total minimum 2 years curriculum. As a German highschool student it
was very tiring and one would like to scream: Damn! I got it! My grandparents and
grand-grandparents were monsters! just to finally focus on other subjects. But
unfortunately the time horizon in our history classes ended roughly with the year 1962,
because we ran out of time. So basically we ended history classes with the Cuba Crisis
and the hint of the construction of the Berlin Wall, although we were already in the year
2000 and therefore 11 years after the fall of the same wall. So we missed at school to
learn about other important dates and events in post-war German history such as 1968,
hiring of guestworkers (and the failure to adequately integrate them into German
society), the oil crisis in the 1970s, the further development of the cold war until its end,
the first years after reunification (which would have been interesting for us as we were
experiencing that time as children ourselves)
Liv, another observation which I made is about showing national pride:

Outside football events (or sport events in general), national pride is expressed by:
a) praising the German purity law (you know, that food regulation, which dictates what
ingredients are allowed in a beer. It is also the oldest active food regulation in the world,
dating back to the year 1518).
b) taking pride in supposedly being among the least patriotic/nationalistic countries in
the world. Sounds like a paradox, right?
About German humour, there are also regional differences. From my observations,
Southern Germans dont get the jokes of Northern Germans and vice versa.
About German directness: My observation is that this is the main point, why Germans
are considered rude by so many people in the world, and this is also the point I get into
trouble with my non-German friends, colleagues, bosses and customers. We are being
taught in school to identify a problem, name it and then work together to solve it. Not
much place for learning how to express yourself in a more subtle way in order to not
hurt someones feelings. From my experience, only the Dutch people are in general even
more direct (so direct that even a German might consider them rude).
It is always good to read such lists about ones own people, especially when you deal with
foreigners or live abroad. I am myself from Hamburg, but live for 3 years already in
Wroclaw, Poland. (No, I dont have Polish ancestry).
Greetings!
Dennis
Liv says:
I definitely secretly jaywalk IF there are no children around and IF there arent too many
people to stare at me.
I love Klsch too I agree with you!
deininnererkompass (http://gravatar.com/deininnererkompass) says:

Oh and we dont like inauthenticity. But I guess that goes hand in hand with being direct,
honest and straightforward.

Yes, I cannot stomach fake people. In the South they are really good at turning it on and
off and when they are on they are so sweet it makes me sick. My daughter has lived in the
South for 20 years now (grew up in New England) and is just as good at it as everybody else
here. Hate it.
Markus says:
@ Ulrike: Indeed! The epitome of that is the expression Bless Your Heart. That can be
used as a very sympathetic statement, or it can be used as a huge insult.
Liv says:
Very true!
Sybille (http://Facebook) says:

Oh how true it is
Liv says:
Thank you!
leodahl says:
So true! I am German and I have an Australian Boyfriend. He always points out a lot of these
things. Thank you. I had a giggle.
Christian says:
I love it!
Liv says:
Danke!
Olivia Rose says:

I am German and these are awesome, well done!
Liv says:
And you have a fantastic name, from one Olivia to another!
Kay says:
Me as a german, i just want to let you know.99% of this is soooo true!!

Oh my godi laughed sooo hard!! The queue and check out line in the supermarket..soo
true..also, when we are waiting for busses, and they finally comethere wont be a queue
everyone wants to get a seat so, who is first, wins! Elbows are everywhere:D And i have to
admit, im also one of the elbowthrower
So, thank you for this list, and the fun i head with reading it:)
Hope, you have a good time here in Germany!!
Here is a hand shake no hug;)

Kay
Liv says:
So pleased you like it, I am shaking your hand back!
Jojo says:
Im German and agree with that list.
Judith says:
I just had to laugh about myself. I guess in most points youre right! It is so true! It was a lot
of fun, reading it. Thank you!
Liv says:
Wonderful to hear, I am so glad you enjoyed reading it.
Jill says:
What about all the clubs that Germans belong to?

Well, I like clubs, official clubs as well as unofficial. I remember hanging out at the local
swimming place when I was around 10 in the summer with friends. We went there even if it
rained. For the last 30 years or so we used to hang out on our boats at the yacht club even
when it rained. We also spent winter weekends at a large ski cabin with our sailing friends for
decades. Now we live in Georgia.boring as hell

Yes, You can say just about anything about a person in the South as long as you preface it with
bless her/his heart. It really is so funny to list peoples unique expression or qualities in
different areas of the same country or different countries. I love it. I I have not laughed so
munch in a long time as when I read the list about Germans.
sylvia (http://www.einsameinsel.de) says:

great collection! thanks for making me laugh about my own culture
Liv says:
Thank YOU for reading!
piepmatzz says:
They seem to enjoy Westlife. And Take That. And Backstreet Boys.
I know nooooooone who like that old BoyBands in Germany (and no one lieke Hasselhoff
XD).
I dont know why do u think that?!! o.o Maybe u listened to retro-charts or retro-radio-
shows???
Liv says:
One too many house parties with children of the 90s? Hahahaha.
Olli says:
32. Germans lose their what?
Liv says:
charming expression, isnt it!
Dominique says:
I doubt your knowledge about this culture. Is this really all you could write about Germans?
Pretty clear you havent lived long enough in this country. Its so superficial.
Don Krypton (https://plus.google.com/u/0/112043853267474748639/posts) says:

In this comment line, youre a 1%er. And rude, BTW. And you have a bad sense of humor.
You surely lived long enough in this country.
Paola says:
I am married to an (East) German and this describes his family 1,000%. I am from Latin
America, which means we couldnt come from two more different backgrounds!
Liv: you are incredibly hilarious! This is stuff of comedy legends! jaja !!
Their love of *raw* minced pork always baffles me. Their honesty, punctuality, care when
doing things properly, ordnung, liking of nudity (hilarious), quiet meals (Ive fallen asleep in
the middle of a dinner. Honestly), bizarre liking of British tv programmes, love of English
songs (even older people who speak no English!), love of frozen food, etc used to make me feel
like I was in another universe. After living withand adjusting to my husband I do think they
are cool people (in general
Liv says:
The silent meals! I used to die quietly in my chair, or make lots of noises to fill the silence,
like fake coughing and mmmmmmm, lecker. Now my boyfriends family understand my
horror of silences and try to fill them, which is very s. Can only imagine the wonderful
cultural clashes that come out of a Latin American/German marriage brilliant!
Moritz says:
Being a german its a whole new experience for me to read so much great stuff about germans.
Thank you
Liv says:
You are so welcome.
Alicia Schmidt says:

99% is so true! I am German but I live in Missouri USA! And the culture is so different!
Liv says:
Like chalk and cheese, right?
Kazia Sidaro says:

Fun, somewhat informative and affirming. I have hosted German students. This certainly
affirms my experiences.
Liv says:
Excellent!
Marcus Hammerschmitt
(http://www.cityinfonetz.de/homepages/hammerschmitt/) says:
Had a good laugh. Totally true.
Marcus Hammerschmitt
(http://www.cityinfonetz.de/homepages/hammerschmitt/) says:
One tiny thing about Germans & German weather has to be added though:
https://sayhi.co/moments/20et5t7o (https://sayhi.co/moments/20et5t7o)
Liv says:
Hahaha, just read it very true!
Maximilian Quost says:

This is just incredibly amusing and absolutely right! I was fascinated by having such a detailed
point of view from a person not being german and still pointing out the facts very
germanous (right and accurate). Truly, I love lists like that. Me being german, its sometimes
difficult to be objective, although I think it is inalienable. But reading this text, was very much
fun and I enjoyed it to the fullest. Thank you very very much dear miss!
Liv says:
Fantastic! Very happy to hear it.
Saija says:
No one I know eats Sauerkraut on a regular basis and despite being German I am not punctual
at all. Also, few people speak english well, I dont know how you got that impression.
Wearing clothes while the sun is shining, oh, how I whsh it were true but unfortunately its
not. No Ikea I know has a Bratwurst stand out front and yes, we do jaywalk. Of course we
recycle our bottles, theres a deposit placed on it, do you throw away money? I dont. Hate
Football, not interested in cars.
After fact 100 it gets better. Finally. But we have this exact show: Wer wird Millionr? Quite
the eqivalent, dont you think? And you call Germanys public toilets clean? Oh boy..
You forgot one last thing: We love to complain.
Liv says:
Hahahaha, very good.
Jule says:
I was travelling in Scotland recently and got a ride in a van. The driver and I hadnt spoken yet
and he told me to fasten my seatbelt. I had already done it and he said Oh, youve got to be
German! I guess fastening the seatbelt immediately is quite a German thing as well
Liv says:
S fastening your seatbelt = well behaved and rule abiding = German. (Generally
speaking.)
steffen says:
Noch war ich so gerhrt danke!
Liv says:
Bitte!
Sirena says:
It is a nice article but no one is perfect and they also have some negatives points like:
1. Germans are self-centre.

2. Germans are selfish they dont like to share anything.
3. Germans count cent by cent and all about the money have to be exactly (cent by cent)
4. Some germans are racist
5. Germans are so saving they are always looking for cheaper or costless things.
6. Germans like dirty sex
7. Germans are not so open to new people. It takes time to come along with german people.
It is a great article, my BF is german that is why I considere important to include the bad
points, because sometimes when you find it at the beginning is not so easy to manage,
especially if you come from some warm and polite culture like Latin or Asian.
CreeTar (@ChkDny) (http://twitter.com/ChkDny) says:

Why is 6. something bad, are you puritan?

To 2. are you from Greece :p?
Steffen says:
this is the most stupid thing i ever heard.
brave says:
me too!
Eleonore says:
Why is that? Why do people become so intolerant when others try to take a look at the
other side of a given topic? Take it easy.
brave says:
@Sirena: You forgot to tell that SOME cars are parking in Germany.
@Liv: very good list. I love it
Kat says:
yeah you mean some people are racist. Racists are EVERYWHERE, not only in Germany.
lenna says:
I <3 being german.
Charles Shivnarain (https://www.facebook.com/shiv09) says:

some other points to consider, children with their square backpacks and dont forget the
Schultute! (the usually large cone filled with school supplies), St. Martins day lantern making
and village walking, laufrad (they dont believe in training wheels, rightfully so), and the
Saturday (like clockwork) street cleanings. my wife is German and ive been over here since
97, and your 62 is significant, it can take some time to warm but they dont use the word
friend like we do in America. if they call you friend it is sincere, not that were INSINCERE, but
we toss that word around more easily. i once asked the vet Wie gehts? and the next visit she
asked my wife something like Ist er mit mir verarscht? which roughly translates to is he
taking the piss out of me? like in a shopping queue, say hello, pay for your shit, press the F*
on.
Liv says:
The Laufrad, yes! And I had to really, really work on my habit of following up my hi with
how are you when I first got here actually bite my tongue, because it just doesnt go
down the same way.
Andi says:
So cute and so true. I love it.
Liv says:
Dankeschn!
Lan Nguyen says:

I believe that Germans are the most intelligent people in the world I dont know, met some
guys, they really understood me since the beginning, i mean they have high EQ and IQ as well
Really nice people! X
Liv says:
Wonderful to hear!
Chris (http://condensedfact.blogspot.com) says:

So Clich, but so true!!

Being German, I can add one more:
150. We love pointing out errors. Like the one in 131. Its called Frhjahrsmdigkeit and not
of Frhlingsmdigkeit. Oh, and we LOVE combiningmultiplewordsintonewones!
Liv says:
True on both counts! Danke!
Manni says:
Germans queue differently. Example: You go in a full packed bakery, you find your space and
then check who is entering the shop after you. You just remember that and the its your turn to
order when youre longest waiting in the queue. It looks on-organized but it works on a 3D
dimensional level, everyone is inside and nobody has to wait in a 2D line outside the bakery.
Its much more effective and it leaves you a chance to be friendly, you have the chance to let
someone else in front of you.
Liv says:
This is an excellent summation I like the 3D level theory.
Marco R. (http://www.rassau.net) says:

Hi Liv,
one should notice that bavarian people are more the clich (of Sauerkraut) than the rest of
germany. You are right with those small village struggles, but there are very large region
differences through the whole country, mostly divided by sorts of beer
Enjoyed this list very much though, the garden gnome was killing me
Liv says:
Very true! And those garden gnomes my goodness
Lexi says:
As per Point 141 Germans Like House Shoes many Germans seem to choose a pair of fake
Crocs both for themselves and their children, as a general house/garden shoe.
These are not fake crocs they are called Glotschen and originate from Holland and are made
from wood. Keep your facts straight.
Liv says:
No, no, I really do mean the plastic imitation crocs, not the Glotschen, but thank you for
your comment.
Papa (der beiden kleinen Chefs) (http://weristderchef.wordpress.com) says:

Nailed it and made my day. Thanks for that good laugh on a Tuesday morning. Yes, thats all
true. Were like that Guess it could be worse
Liv says:
You are so welcome, thank you for reading. Could be so much worse- you guys are great!
Benni says:
This is so great and written so well!! I saw myself in about 80-90% of them and really had to
grab my desk so I wouldnt drop to the floor laughing at quite a few examples. Especially the
Dinner For One story.
Saw you lived in Kiel, thats where I live. Did you like it?
Liv says:
LOVED Kiel. LOVED it. I think it was being by the water there is a special mentality in the
people who live on the coast. Cant wait to get back there.
Patrick Hoenigk (https://www.facebook.com/patrick.hoenigk) says:

To my fellow countrymen who are angry at this,
EVERY country/culture got their own little things that to others outside of this country may
seem weird/strange or even funny. Now, if you cannot handle that or just have a laugh or two,
means somethings wrong with YOU and not the nice lady who took the effort to create this list.
Get off you high horse and take a step back. even if some of the mentioned things in that list
dont apply to YOU, they still sure as hell do for MANY MANY of my beloved fellow Germans.
So take it easy, relax, have a laugh and just take it for what it is. A warm and funny look at our
society
Thomas says:
Hi
Im german and agree with your entire list.
I love the Australian culture as well! I spent a year in Brisbane and whats acutally missing in
the German culture is the no worries attitude in my opinion
However, great job capturing the german mindset!
Nicole Glser Eriksson (http://thinkfacebook.wordpress.com) says:

Hehe, what a cool list, Liv. Love it. Thank you! Spargelzeit
Matze says:
Excellent job, made me laugh a lot :D. Ive been living in Sydney for a year now and while
going through the list I realised how German I actually am. Most points are pretty positive
though!
Kat says:
Love love love the list thank you Liv!

Dont forget we do have gay politicians who are not scared to come out. No one cares! they are
humans, just like everyone else.
on a side note to qeuing: we do know how to qeue, but once a news aisle has opened, a new
entrence whatsoever, cards are getting mixed again. Once in a qeue, we accept the position
were in and everythings in order again.
Jules says:
no offense but: Really?! So wrong on so many levels (Really? The old socks-in-sandals-story?)
Not only that I am, for example, small, cant drink or eat much, would never mix anything
other than lemonade into my beer (!), cant stand dubbed sitcoms and would rather cut off my
huge Bavarian moustache than entering a Tschibo shop, I just cant see the humor (sorry, did
I miss the point where it says that Germans dont get irony? Thats another big one, right?) In
any case do you think lists of not-even-funny Germans are this (or, lets say Greeks are
that) sentences are what will bring this world forward? What are you trying to achieve?
You do realize that positive stereotypes are still stereotypes, right?!
Kat says:
well well well, what do we have here. a german who didnt get the joke. im german and i
think its hilarious. If you dont, deal with it. dont speak for all of us when its just you whos
offended.
Jules says:
Hello Kat, I am not offended, you misread me. And I am not claiming that I am speaking
for all Germans, as opposed to the author, who claims that all Germans are
I am sorry, I just dont think that this kind of list is funny, entertaining or clever, and that
is independent of it being about Germans. Some nuancing or cultural sensitivity on the
part of the author (and some of the commentators) would have been great, dont you
think?
Please, just think what happened if I posted a list that was made up on 100 things I
KNOW (sic!) about Women, Blacks, the Greeks, or (god forbid!) THE Americans
(or, as Gerhard Polt aptly puts is: Der Asiate an und fr sich). What a shitstorm that
would cause!
In any case, I stand to my point that positive stereotypes are still stereotypes, no matter
about whom they are made! And no matter how funny other Germans might find it (as it
might cater to this peculiar self-identity that oscillated between self-hate and patriotic
pride), I never find stereotypes or racism funny.
Kat says:
be careful with comparing sterotypes to racism. Racism isnT funny, sterotypes can be.
Look at all the germans in the comments who absolutly agree with this list. so, most
germans are like this. I dont have gnomes on my yard, dont wear socks in my
sandals, dont like sauerkraut etc. But i do know many germans who do! I dont eat
meat, but many germans do. Livs list is no list where she came up with things. its a
list of things she actually observed many times. And its absolutely okay that she
writes about them. After all the title is what i know about germans and not
germans are defenitely like that.
Liv says:
Hi Jules,
Thanks for your comments, and no offense taken. To answer your question, I suppose
what I am trying to achieve, is simply a collation of observations I have made during
my time living here. The key word being I. This list is entirely subjective, it is a
collection of things I have noted, during my time here. Which is why it is called What I
Know About Germans. I think in this case, the pronoun is more important than the
verb know it indicates these are my experiences and if you share them, wonderful!
If you dont, no worries at all. It is simply not realistic to assume everybody has
identical experiences.
But am I trying to move the world forward by writing an entirely light-hearted,

personal collection of observations of a culture within which I am a happy foreigner?
No. Is something like this lacking in cultural nuance? I dont believe so, unless you
stopped reading at the socks and sandals line. Is it racist? Absolutely not.
Again, thanks for your comments, I really do like reading all kinds of feedback and
appreciate you dont find it remotely amusing or accurate and that is your
prerogative.
Liv
JJ says:
Dear Liv,
being a german myself I have to say I really enjoyed reading the list. Its funny, and it
reminded me why I like being a german (and why I loathe it sometimes!). With germans being
masters of self-criticism its heartwarming when an expat finds so many likable things about
us.
Oh, and I always thought its called Frhjahresmdigkeit, but that may be just my dialect.
After all, we tend to get tired during spring. Probably because its the time where we put a lot
of energy into finding a proper mate (an endeavour that has a huge set of far to fuzzy rules
which is very demanding of your average german ). But who really gets tired OF spring?
Keep it up!
JJ
@Jules: Come off your moral high ground. Of course stereotypes dont apply to an individual.
But they exist, wether or not you like to see them. Personally, I think stereotypes that are made
explicit can be deburred- those kept under the blanket will keep their destructive potencial.

Good God how much more uptight can you get. Relax, stop taking yourself so seriously and
learn to lighten up and laugh a little, even at yourself.
Cailean says:
LOL I was reading #15 and I was wondering what the author was talking about. Raw meat?
Thats disgusting! Must be something some bavarians in their village in the mountains eat!
After all bavarian=barbarians.
My northern german sensibilities were thoroughly offended.
Hours later I made myself a nice slice of bread with Thringer Mett and onions and thats
when I understood what you talked about. For me that never was raw pork meat, but
something else entirely. Thringer Mett in my mind was always its own category. Absurd,
but true.
When I told my family that episode we all shared a good laughed Funny side note: All the
females shared my initial disgust, while the males said, yes, its Thringer Mett.
shiv says:
Bavaria is the Texas (or Quebec) of Germany. yeah, they WANT to be separate but they
probably wont do it.
OvGa91 says:
This is the most racist blog I ever read! _ Please dont compare your bavarian experince
with german behavour in General. those bavarian People want to seperate themself from
Germany
Liv says:
Oh, I know the Bavarians consider themselves of a different nation! Actually I have spent
longer living in the north-west and north of Germany, than I have Bavaria, so I cant say too
many of my observations are specifically Bavarian.
chiasue (http://gravatar.com/chiasue) says:

Great article I am also an expat living in Germany ;).

Yes, some Germans love their wurst, but you forgot to mention that Germany is one of the
countries where vegetarianism is growing the most and that it is the 2nd country in the
European Union with the most vegetarians.
Even traditional restaurants have one or two vegetarian (although not vegan) dishes.
Another positive point about Germans, they are very environmentally and socially-conscious,
which is not only limited to meticulous recycling but also includes activism.
Liv says:
So true re the environment I think so many countries could learn from how Germany
invests in sustainable energy projects and their recycling system. Australia certainly could!
German dude says:

Hi Liv, i lold hard Great job and 100 % true!

I think i can explain why EASTERN Germans love The Hasselhoff, its because they think
he personally teared down the Berlin Wall by singing I am looking for freedom. Seriously
Liv says:
Hahaha I think HE thinks that too! But I do think the Germans are just having a laugh at
Hasselhoff, to be honest.
Marc Exner (https://www.facebook.com/marc.exner.3) says:

Hasselhoff Yes, he used to be a big star in the 90s. Nowadays we only like him ironically.
And Germans always wearing boots and never going bare foot? Cant confirm.
But everything else is shockingly spot-on.
Liv says:
Yup, I firmly believe your Hasselhoff thing, as a country, is entirely tongue in cheek and
speaks to your sense of humour.
Sine (http://www.joburgexpat.com) says:

Liv I love it! As a German now American I can attest that most of this is spot-on. Im never
punctual and I hate the German queueing system (or, rather, lack of a system our kids when
little and on a visit to Germany almost got trampled to death at a breakfast buffet; in fact, you
should probably put something in there about buffets and the average German on a mission to
get something for free), perhaps that is why I no longer live there?
Sine (http://www.joburgexpat.com) says:

Oh, and youd probably smile at this story I wrote some time back about a South African trying
to shop barefoot in Germany: http://www.joburgexpat.com/2013/01/shopping-barefoot-in-
germany-and-other.html (http://www.joburgexpat.com/2013/01/shopping-barefoot-in-germany-
and-other.html)
NineInchNade says:
Just one thing. Dner is a german dish. It was invented in Germany and people in Turkey
barely know about its existence. Just saying.
Liv says:
Very, very true but the kebab itself, which the dner is based on, is actually a Lebanese
dish, which is also hugely popular in Australia and the UK. So the Dner that has come out
of Germany is a Germanified version of that, falsely attributed to the Turkish people! Its all
so confusing.
Halit Batuk says:

come on !!! yes also lebanen aslo does kebab. But t originates from turkey. There is kinds
of kebab and no any country can do as delcus as turkey does. Also all europe and entire
world eats,knows,cooks kebab because it is delicious and turksh people brougt it there.
Also n germany if u see n every street kebab house its thanks to turksh people that live
there in germany.
Halit Batuk says:

just ask to whole world f any other country execp germany says its not turksh then ll say
JUST SAYING. otherwise you JUST SAYING!!
NESTOR says:
Oh my, what a hoot. As a German having lived in the US for the past 10 years this rings very
true for many of the items on the list and makes me a little home sick. I wouldnt be a German
if I didnt have a few quibbles with some of the things mentioned, but thats reinforcing
another stereotype. The one that Germans are always right. But its not a matter of being right,
it has to be factually correct. Just saying.
Having grown up in a region that loves a good get-together more than anything, I have never
once experienced a silent meal, though. Quite to the contrary. Lively conversations from finish
to the mandatory very late end (see Sitzfleisch).
Things to add/add more nuance:

1. Draft can kill you, and only if you are very lucky you only get a cold. AC is the devil.
2. Punctuality for anything that requires it, flexibility for everything else, like a bar meetup
with friends where 20 min mean nothing to a German, but an American would already have
asked where the the heck you are via text message. Same goes for planning. My German family
and friends are actually quite spontaneous when it comes to making plans, even for vacations.
Americans book tickets 8 months in advance, obsessively print out maps for car trips, and
know almost to the minute when they will arrive at a place 350 miles away. To this day, that
boggles my mind. But maybe I am just a bad German, like my US friends keep insisting when it
comes to this topic.
3. Grilling. Everything about it.
4. DM Drogerie Markt. Its a wonderland of body products.
4. Restrooms: Veto. They are cleaner in the US and they have WARM WATER (crazy concept, I
know) to wash your hands. What a treat.
Thanks again. This made my day!
Mo Fu (https://www.facebook.com/monique.fuhrmann.3) says:
Nestor, I know who you are!
nicki letts (http://www.minorwords.com.au) says:

42, 46 and 99 are my favourites. As a fellow Aussie currently in Mainz, Ive spend many hours
in queues wondering why Im still queuing!
Liv says:
Only to find out there IS no queue, and you have been loitering politely as people
shamelessly surge ahead!
JTK (http://www.kalpen.de) says:

I am German. And I LOVE Bratwurst!
barb says:
you forgot the whole airplane applauding the pilots landing
Dan (http://www.liveworktravelusa.com) says:

Good one!
Dan (http://www.liveworktravelusa.com) says:

LOL!! Awesome list. Had to share this with my American friends
Chris says:
Awesome Love it
Steph says:
You sure nailed it, this list is hilarious and you managed to turn a lot of complaints Id have
about my own country into something flattering and cheerful
Cheers, mate!
Philipp says:
Dont forget ESZETT, the bun-fitting, square chocolate slices for breakfast!!
Liv says:
What is this? I have not heard of it!
Ror says:
Darf ich bitten, Eszet-Schnitten!
karthikkk says:
Some of the stuff in the list I agree with! Most other I dont. Germany can be a pleasant
experience if you are a white. Most others have it tough in terms of getting stereptyped in
negative light at work and having to deal with the German attitude of I am always right and
having to prove that they could perform equally well as a fellow German colleague. God forbid
if you showed too much intelligence.
A German workplace although very efficient and pragmatic, is not one that encourages
creativity largely like the Anglo-Saxon work culture. Conformance is more a norm than being
different. And very eloquent English speakers who are German have this nasty habit of talking
amongst themselves in German in front of English speaking non white people which they dont
usually do when they are speaking with English speaking white people. (I am a foreigner in
Germany and speak fluent German. But the Germans dont usually assume I could speak good
German and sometimes crack a joke or 2 before I let them know)
Germany is one of the most beautiful countries to live in. It is a modern democracy and
welcomes immigrants. Has world class institutions and a unique culture to boast of. Is a model
for many non English developing economies of the world and has high standards of
production and cleanliness on a large scale. But individual experiences do vary and the social
structure of the German society has still not opened itself up to the modern ideas of
Globalization and diversity as well as countries like Canada, Australia, the U.K and the U.S.
One cant help but feel that Germany wants to go the British way in accepting immigrants but
also wants a bit of France and ends up staying in a quagmire. The usual German standards of
excellence in Organization and capacity planning are a model to the world. Right now
Germany is very much the boss in Europe but it would be interesting to see in the next 50
years, what would happen to Germany as the developing world takes over slowly. I guess that
Germany would get even more Industrialized and get even more tough and competitive. But I
also fear that Germany will cause the collapse of the EU. And a united Europe has the best
chance to be competitive in the next 100 years, not the other way.
Unknown says:
I think some points about LARP are missing;)
Tante Ju says:
The piece with Mett you have to get it right. That one infused things in other parts of the world
The famous steak in Hamburger style, which is said to be the start of Hamburgers in USA,
is nothing else than fried minced meat, called Frikadellen or Buletten (some other names
apply as well) in Germany. Mett is supposed to be minced pork meat, while Tartar is supposed
to be half/half (half pork meat, half beef). Mett or Tartar is just raw minced meat, nothing else.
No spices, no salt. Did you ever come along the usualy unavoidable Mettigel (minced meat
hedgehog) for special occasions, consumed with good bread and loads of beer?
There is even a legal act about Mett and all types of minced meat: Hackfleischverordnung
(http://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hackfleischverordnung
(http://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hackfleischverordnung)).
Very well written, still laughing. But I do not get the Sauerkraut thing. We get it maybe four
to five times a year and there is only one restaurant I know nearby, serving Sauerkraut. Is this
considered to be loving Sauerkraut?
Cailean says:
You have forgotten a north german food season. The Grnkohl/Braunkohl Season during fall.
What Sauerkraut is to the people in the south, thats Grnkohl for the North Germans, maybe
even more so. Its almost as crazy as Spargel season. And yes, this food season comes with its
own Kings and Queens rituals.
And did I mention how yummy Grnkohl is?
Liv says:
Gaaaaah Grnkohl! My northerner boyfriend introduced me to this recently. I have to say,
and I am so sorry not a fan. And he puts sugar on it!
Annabelle Knoll (https://www.facebook.com/annabelle.knoll) says:

Well, I AM from Germany and I think at least 90% of your list is correct. When I read that I
laughed so hard and the point is that for most of the points I have a dialing example in my
connections. Go on with this and I go on with laughing in my wicked sense of humor! thumbs
up! ;D
Andreas Maertens (https://www.facebook.com/4nu81) says:

Thats exactly what I thought, when reading this as a german. Great article.
tobglom says:
Funny Stuff! I think (being a German) most of the points are actually nice if you dont take
yourself too serious. The thing about the queueing (i cant even write it correctly without
looking it up) made me laugh the most. Probably because I consider myself a born hater of
queues.
It made me think why this is so. I could imagine that it maybe relates to other facts you pointed
out nicely. A queue is ultimately the result of bad planning/organisation. Therefore we must
not do it properly, as an act of criticism to whoever makes you wait in that moment ;-)! And we
dont like to wait! It might result in not being punctual
Keep up the good work!
Sarah (http://sarah-goes-big-apple.jimdo.com) says:

Hey Liv,
thank you so much. I am German and I cracked up laughing all the time (to be true I am guilty
in most cases). If you get around to it you could add: Germans love to discuss. Everything.
I am doing a year abroad in the U.S. and I have to say I had hard time getting used to be
hugged and cheek-kissed by people I barely now. Awkwaaard!
Thumbs up for your work!
Liv says:
Hahaha, and I am now used to shaking everyones hand, instead of going in for the hug.
Glad you liked the list!
U. Klaeser-mueller says:
I am a german and the first tought was this guy lived way back at the Black Forest very old
fashion living- too bad he could not see the modern live style of Germany.
EM says:
I read this with a little doubt in my mind, but you nailed my entire German family. Im an
American with a German mother who teaches German in public schools in America and often
struggle to get my students to believe me when I come up with these statements, now I have a
place on the internet (where everything is true of course) that I can go and show them, see #
its exactly what I said. Thank you! Hats off to you for being so positive and thoughtful when
writing about another culture, none of these things are bad, just a little different
Ulrike says:
Well, I lived near the Schwarzwald (Vaihingen/Enz then Ludwigsburg/Stuttgart), close enough
to ski there in the winter and there was nothing old fashioned about my family, their friends
nor my friends!!!!!!!!!!! a few years ago we had a 15 year old boy staying with us for a few
weeks. He was from Freiburg, nothing old fashioned about him for Freiburg either.
Where are you from???
Jannis says:
A realy great article. Im from Frankfurt and I love my hometown, even though Im a little
depressed you didnt visit it. I think its the one town in Germany that resembles Americas big
cities, with its skyline and so on, without being realy big.
For the part with David NO NO NO NO NO NO NO. We do not like him. No we dont. And for
our generation woe dont like Volksmusik, but you are right we almost all know the lyrics.
Kathi says:
Thank you so much! I am german and I laughed sooooo hard. my fav. was: Germans love
Dackels (Dachshunds) and seem to own several of them at once. Perhaps this adoration of
Dachshunds stems from their physical similarity to wurst.
We have a dachshund and we call him always Wurst,because he looks like one

Hat I remained in Germany I would have moved to Frankfurt, not that I did not like Stuttgart
where I worked or Ludwigsburg where I lived but there were so many more international
businesses in Frankfurt.
And as far as Volksmusik goes, I loved the Faschings music and I liked it at Oktoberfests other
wise no way.
However, I now belong to a singing group and we perform wearing Dirndels (I would not have
been caught dead in one before) and Lederhosen.What we enjoy singing most are all the
drinking songs played at Oktoberfest or Fasching!!!
Pat says:
Hi Liv, there are so many points id like to reply to. I loved the whole article and except for 1-3
things everything ist absolutly true Really enjoyed it, though.The socks topic is true and
except for winter its a horrible thing to watch, fashion victims or 45+ generation loves it.
Sandals with socks, urghh. But an easy way to identify a german countryman in spain, italy
Like brits always have a sunburn One explaination for the socks-fetisch might be that many
germans suffer from sweaty feets and therefore want to keep there shoes well-smelling for as
long as possible.
In my climbing group are two frenchman and one belgian. The frenchwoman is struggling
with the german language and always pointing out german is a very bildliche (visual?)
language. Like saying: Kein Problem, es ist ja alles im Rahmen geblieben. And we have these
things a lot without even realising it.
One more point to add to your list is an annoyance to every tourist (esp. brits) on vacation:
Germans love to claim their sun lounger with a towel. They get up early just to be the first to
place their towel, go back to sleep, get up 1-2 hours later, have breakfast, conquer the lounger,
mission accomplished.
Heiner Vlkel says:

Nice one!!! Butdont you know? We own Dackels as Wurst replacements for emergency.
Doro (http://1lebenszeichen.blogspot.com) says:

Love it! My favourite is 100. In fact, at ALDI, when the queue was too long, I just stood next to
it, near the closed check out to wait until one opens. I believe Im safe to say I mastered that
technique to an honorable level. It is a skill that needs experience in observing your
surroundings in a professional manner, determining the next to be opened check out (only in
case the open one is in the middle, thus the queue blocking your way), therefore analyzing
walking direction of approaching check out girl/boy and lingering around innocently as to not
arouse suspicion until then quickly walking to check out and having all items lined up while
clerk is still fiddling with her/his keys for the cash register Yup thats how you do it, but now
Im in Australiahavent tried it here yet. And not sure if I should
Jochen says:
Liv,
thanks fr the read, I really enjoyed it
For 137, you might want to research the term Gefrige Stille
Greetings from Frankfurt

Jochen
Andrei (http://gravatar.com/cheadz) says:

LOL, thought I was the only one noticing the Wolfskin obsession It helps identifying
German tourists in London as well (I am German myself)
Helmut says:
Also Nummer 136 gefllt mir am besten.
Ulrike says:
Never heard this expression and also never encountered a silent dinner in my 28 years in
Germany, not in my family nor anywhere else I ever had dinner. Is this something new?
We always had lively discussions also when we had lunch in the cafeteria at work.
Ulrike says:
As far as the sock and sandals go, never in my time. Only Americans used to do that back then
in Germany and America and some still do. The same goes for reserving the lounger. I have
been complaining about this habit for many many years here in America and on vacation in
Mexico, Cost Rica etc. I even complained to the people managing the resorts but to no avail.
Siggy Buckley (http://www.IoncehadaFarminIreland.blogspot.com) says:

So funny & true! Especially about Spargel, Tchibo nad Dinner for One on New Years
Eve.Leaving Cert?Was this written by an Irish person? I love it!
Liv says:
No, no, Im Australian!
J Gttl says:
I would just add that Germans are quick to switch to English (for practice), while
simultaneously admonishing you for not speaking better German. And there is no argument in
the world that will get a German to back down from their opinion that you should speak their
complex language from the moment you step onto German soil.
If my efforts in German-only conversation are met with criticism, I like to switch to top-tier
English vocabulary with winding and tangential sentence structure. I do not (yet) possess the
humility of my German friends.
Liv says:
Oh my God you NAILED IT. That has been my PRECISE experience.
chloe says:
ok so i didnt read all of the abvove comments cos i was so eager to leave mine, but in case no
one has said it already i think like berlin east germany can also be excused from a lot of the
points,.. they do things slightly differently over here aswell. though ALOT of your points are
also VERY true and i particularly like and have myself long noted 101-the ability to open a
bottle of beer with literally anything in arms reach-including like you said-body parts great
list,..its nice sometimes to be reminded that im not abnormal,..just not german
Ira-in-Oz says:
Hej Liv!
Great list, it depicts many years of observation of (middle-aged) Germany !
adding to point 37: Breaking traffic rules is a so-called Volkssport in Germany. If the sign says
50 the traffic will go just under 60 and so on, on an Autobahn it can go up to 30km/h more than
allowed. Basically, it is socially accepted to break the traffic rules here. Such high fines as in
Australia (236$ for a parking fine ???!!!) would cause a huge up-roar!
Another fun fact: How to tell a German on holidays from other travellers? By their hiking
boots!
Cheers and greetings from Sydney! Thanks for a good laugh!
Judith Chen says:

very true, most of the cases. I live in Germany myself, and as a student I might say, about
knocking they have a habit of knocking the table with their knuckles after the lecture is over,
or after a presentation.
Liv says:
Hahaha yes! Some of my students do this after classes. Also, they knock on the table if they
are greeting a big group, instead of saying hello to everyone.
aristokitten (@aristokitten) (http://twitter.com/aristokitten) says:

This is brilliant, and so funny, it almost made me spit my breakfast against the screen. Im
German (vegetarian though, so a bit of a social outlaw when it comes to the Bratwurst thing)
and living in Kiel. For me, its particularly lovely to read about all these familiar things as seen
through a strangers eye because you really lose sight for it when you live here. Thanks very
much, this is definitely a blog that I will keep following.
Liv says:
Thank you! I love Kiel, cannot wait to move back after our stint in Bayern is done. Were
spending Christmas up here, it is such a relief to see water.
Pcb says:
I missed one the oh so serious talking head shows on TV, usually with a young pretty blonde
and an older, distinguished grey-haired gentleman in the mix (along with others who wear
uber-stylish glasses or haircuts). Topic of discussion irrelevant but always dry
Hepzi says:
Well, I stumbled upon this interesting page of observations when searching on DB+gift and it
was definitely worth the visit
Some of it helps me better understand the folk in German speaking part of North Switzerland
where I am based previously spent a couple of years in Brissie and wanted to just Gday.
Liv says:
GDay! Are there many cultural differences between the German speaking Swissies in the
part you live, and the Germans just north of the border (BWers, really)?
Markus says:
Liv, your comment reminded me of something I noticed that Australians like to do: Every
word can be turned into an ie or ies ending (like your use of Swissies). A few years
ago, I traveled to Tasmania with my family. When we were on the shuttle bus at Sydney
Airport to get to the connecting flight to Hobart, we told an Australian couple where we
were going. Their response: Youll like Tassie!
John says:
I found the multiple reference to Germans love sausage & other meat quite curious. In my
experience, the 2nd largest group of obnoxiously in your face vegans/vegetarians have been
Germans. (The largest group are American women in California or those who want be in CA.)
Liv says:
Hahaha. Sure I think most of these live in Berlin, or similarly large cities.

Thank you very much cant stop laughing and I am german.
Vanessa Sanford (https://www.facebook.com/vsanford) says:

Ja, ich auch!
Liv says:
You are welcome, thank you!
Vanessa Sanford (https://www.facebook.com/vsanford) says:

I dont know about the Jay-walking thing. We did in my home town alot, As for the dance, I
dont know, either. Where I am from, it is normal to attend a dance school from age 12-16
(when you are allowed to go to the club).
Starting 6th grade, thats all we did, shake hands. The girls loved to go around holding each
others hands.
Liv says:
Cuuuuute was it something you were told to do in 6th grade?
Dick says:
Lame
Manfred Helfert says:

While I agree to many observations, the one about Dachshunds (Dackel) strikes me as possibly
rather regional (Bavarian?).
Where I live, near Frankfurt, I do NOT recall having seen one Dackel within the last year (but
plenty of Mpse and Pudel).
Liv says:
Haha yes, the Mpse are also popular! I first noticed the Dackel thing in Mnster, NRW. And
definitely here in Bavaria. Perhaps theyre just not as popular in Frankfurt?
Ulrike says:
When I grew up in Germany we always drank tapwater and Sprudel, however later in the
70ies and 80ies my parents always were upset when we visited and drank tap. I have to say
that it was not as good as before. Most of the last 40 years we lived in the country or at least
outside the city and had well water which always was delicious. Now, here in Marietta,
Georgia, we drink filtered water from the fridge as tap really is very chlorinated and not good.
As for beer, I always preferred wine but always drank beer to be sociable at Octoberfests or
other such occasions. I liked the semi dry Rieslings grown around Stuttgart and the Trollinger
was my mothers favorite every day wine.
When I do drink beer I prefer Hefeweizen which was very hard to get in the US but is slowly
becoming more popular.
As far as Dackel are concerned, I dont remember seeing many in Germany and I lived there 24
years, however, I fell in love with one from a rescue agency. He was one when we adopted him
and is now 10, he still barks a lot and we have a fenced in back yard and a gate on the front
deck although as he gets older he is less likely to run outside.
Sandra says:
Hey Liv,
I really like your article. I am German, and most of the things are true but you forgot our
wonderful social security system, I think that another good thing at germany.
take care and kind regards.
Sandra
Liv says:
Thank you so much Sandra. Very true about the social security system!
SYQ says:
You clearly forgot about Beamtendeutsch and Schachtelstze. They definitely got to be in
there. I think you already covered the very popular Komposita by referring to Mark Twain,
but the sentence structure of written German in a, for example, legal context can be
impressing.
Another German says:

x. Germans are very rude drivers.

When a German gets into his car hes not out for an enjoyable drive, hes going to war.
Hilarious article, made me laugh tears!
Leonie says:
Also very much enjoyed and loved your article! Nice observations!
Thought you could have mentioned our obsession and love towards Weihnachtsmarkt and
Glhwein something I very much miss here in the states!
Arjen says:
Wahahaha terrible I was laughing out loud and by the way the song at point 29 should
be COCO JAMBO if you mean the hit by Mr. President
Chris says:
So, when it is a relief for you to see water, you have to come to Hamburg. Just a beautiful city
and not far away from Kiel.
Liv says:
I loooove Hamburg, and will definitely be spending more time there when we move back
north!
Anita says:
Beautifully written. Hope there is more to come from you. Best of luck
Liv says:
Thank you so much, that is so nice to hear.
zarlock (http://zarlock.wordpress.com/) says:

Hilariously written, my wife and I had a good laugh with it.

And, mostly, it appears to be spot on. Not sure about the Dackels, I havent seen any of those
around for years the statistics say they are still around in numbers, just not sure where.
They (and dogs in general) have been beaten by cats years ago anyways. I think its safe to say
that Germans love cats.
Very much agree with the IKEA and similar stores thing, we also tend to go to these mainly to
enjoy a cheap meal. Of course, while were there, we still come across things we might like to
buyand sometimes do buy. So the concept does work.
And regarding N20yes. It actually tends to drive me nuts why seemingly no native English
speaker is able to get that right. Whats the matter with that?
Well, off to Kaffee und Kuchen. Hope to see more from you in the future.
Kind regards,
Robert
fred scwanewede (http://www.schwanewede.ca) says:

lol bavaria is in germay nearly the sams as a fruitcake in usa lol
Judith Chen says:

I just wanna say I posted something similar but in a little more specific title. Read if you like
http://tinyurl.com/mun6wx3 (http://tinyurl.com/mun6wx3)
Liv says:
I have to say, I loved this. I often find myself complaining about Asian Restaurants that
group in every possible type of food from about ten different Asian countries, put it on a
buffet and call is Asian. Drives me crazy!
Judith Chen says:

indeed. one of the most common fatal mistake is the strangely popular snack: spring roll.
the taste is often off, not even close to the ones in Asia. consequently, what you can enjoy
is mostly the crust. ^^;
Lauren Schnherr says:

I love this! After having lived in Germany for seven years, I have finally found the list that
sums up my own experience and observations!!!! Thank you, Liv! (Is it odd that reading this
made me miss Germany?)
Liv says:
You are so welcome! And I am glad it had the effect of making you miss Germany, now
youll have to come back and enjoy a Bratwurst.
Hannes says:
Hi Liv,
i actually am from Kiel and when I noticed youve been up here(even some Germans think
Germany ends at Hamburg), I had to write something.
but as i read i mentioned that most of your discoveries cant be from here
well, that endless winter thing is a pointand lots of talking about beer and cars and going to
Ikea to eat Hotdogs.one more point
all in one its very funny, mostly because i found some points i didnt even know myself
Thanks for the list and go on,
Hannes
Liv says:
I adore Kiel, in fact, I adore the north. Up there, I feel the most at home, because I am near
the water and people who live near the water have a certain mentality. The list started
when I lived in NRW (in Mnster) and then grew in Bavaria. There are a few things the
northerners do, but perhaps they should have a list all of their own. Eg: they can have
whole conversations featuring the word jo!
Ulrike says:
When I lived in Germany Riesling was synonymous with dry, and yes, I too am still looking
for dry Rieslings here in the US
Martin says:
Thanks for this, I had so much fun reading it! Its always nice to have someone holding up a
mirror to oneself in a charming way. And I confess no. 100 I obviously cant queue and
dont think bad of myself if I run to a newly opened check out :-S
Best wishes from Frankfurt/M.
Liv says:
We need to start a Queuers Anonymous. A lot of confessions are flowing through about
Germs not being able to queue. It totally works in a room full of Germs, they innately
understand the (lack of) system. But put a Brit, or an Aussie or American in there? Things
get ugly.
Martin says:
No. 150 is SO TRUE !!!
Liv says:
NEVER ON TIME! A 9.15am appointment will invariably actually occur at 10am. EVERY
TIME.
Lilly says:
I dated for a year a german guy. I can say they are insensitive. Never speak about their feelings
(not sure they have).

Of course we dont have any feelings
Maike (http://www.reisetageblog.de) says:

Thank you for being kind to us and not minding that we Germans cannot queue (I cant even
spell it, had to look it up). Love your list, no wonder it went viral. I dont eat pigs (vegetarian)
but everything else is true. This coming from a German married to an Englishman who has
been pointig out my German-ness to me since 1999.
Liv says:
Hahahaha, you should point his Britishness out right back at him!
Anne says:
Hey Liv!
This was so much fun to read I laughed really hard with my boyfriend (german) cause most of
it fitted him.
However would like to suggest some things.
Germans are not really tall if you compare them to the rest of Europe ( I am dutchbut not
only compared to us giants ).
As to speaking englishI would say only Bavaria and in Berlin (tourist places) you can speak
english. I live in Hamburg and I would have no one to talk to when I couldnt speak german
yet really even the basics are a no no here, actually (except students) I have maybe met 20
people who actually speak it fairly well. Most people dont speak it I think cause they have
everything synchronized here on TV and even in the cinema.
Being dutch I can tell you NO they are really,really,really not good bicycle riders!! I wonder a
lot of times about what the hell they are doing/planning to do scary at times seriously
What you wrote about staring..THANK YOU in the beginning I didnt get it and was always
looking nervously at my face in the mirror or at my coat trying to find what was wrong with
me. my bf didnt get what I was talking about until I took him to The Netherlands and people
started saying hallo to him on the street haha!! Because in smaller towns in The Netherlands if
you stare a longer time at people for no reason then they just think you want to communicate
with them, too funny!! About the tap water was also spot on! Convinced my bf that it is really
safe to drink it here and there is no need to drag a gallon of water from the supermarket
everywhere you go about the humor though, I have learned their humor now but I have
noticed that germans dont get dry humor or sarcastic humor too often..( being dutch I live and
breath sarcasm) and I get a lot of weird looks before they realize after a minute that it was a
joke,but maybe thats a timing thing cause when I do it on feiertag then all is good and
understood and get a portion of sarcasm back I have noticed they have time for serious
behavior and time for fun here very much separated. All in all nice to read and made me laugh
a lot Cheers
Liv says:
It is true, the Dutchies are tall! And probably more crazy about bikes. But the Northern
Germs tend to be pretty tall (compared to me, anyway hahaha). You are right, the English is
better in touristy places, although I have found in Bavaria, its not particularly good at all, in
the smaller city/towns anyway. I think, with the English thing, it is more than Germans have
the grammar drilled into them from a young age, whereas English speakers never learn our
grammar hence the there/theyre/their constant confusion! And I agree if TV and film
wasnt dubbed here, the Germs would have Scando-style English fluency.
I think it must be fascinating to look at the Dutch/German differences and similarities.

Because to the untrained eye, there are some things the Dutch have in common with the
Germans. And then there are many ways in which they are just so different.
As for the staring thing/not saying hello to people you dont know madness. Although I
have to say, the Bavarians DO greet people on the street, that they dont know. Which is
nice!
Till says:
I do not know if anybody already mentioned it since I did not read all the comments, but
Dinner for One is a German production of NDR (Norddeutscher Rundfunk), where they used
British actors.Thus, no. 97 is surely your (and the same goes for most Germans) impression but
not quite correct
Liv says:
True, it was produced by NDR in the 60s. But the original sketch was written by a Brit, and
performed in the 20s. But the German adoration of it (and the fact it is in English,
undubbed!) remains fascinating.
Saba says:
Liv, thank you so much for writing this! It had me in giggles up to #101 and now Im buying the
book. As a German, #99 becomes apparent only if you travel abroad and try applying what
we consider queuing. Ooooops.
Liv says:
Wonderful to hear. Yes, when I first started raging about queuing, my German boyfriend
had no idea why I was so irritated. Now, he is a queue police like I am! I hope you enjoy the
book, Josh Baumans illustrations are just wonderful.
Jeff Maltz says:

Just a thought, instead of using the word queue which sounds odd and is hard to spell, you can
also say line up or form a line, e.g., The Germans dont like to form lines or
they dont line up well.
Its American English, but its easier to undertand and spell. I never heard the word queue
until I was in Germany. Its also easy to confuse with word cue which means to give a signal
or sign to someone or tell someone something. Could you give me a cue, when youre ready?
or Could you cue me in on what went wrong ?
Anne says:
Jeff, queue is British english, its what people learn in school in Europe thus youll hear it
here everywhere, I would say in particular Germans use proper British English, especially
older people here since they had an exchange program for students here to England and
many Germans learned it there (at least thats what Ive been told by a number of people).
And Liv I am sure uses it because she is Australian and Australian English is closer to British
English since England colonized there, my family is mostly from New South Wales and
especially their English I find closer to British compared to other parts of Australia, with
that I mean the words not the accent they put on it of course .
Liv says:
Ahhhh, isnt so much of the fun of English to be found in homophones?
Ulrike says:
Hi Ann, I am one of the older People you refer to and I learned English at the Gymnasium
from a German who spoke proper English English. There were no exchange programs in my
time as Germany first had to recover from the war I have lived in America for over 40 year in
New Hampshire and Massachusetts (Boston area) and queue is used there as well. Maybe the
language spoken here in New England is closer to that spoken in England . In the South like
Georgia where I now live things are very different. I still, after 3 full years here in Georgia,
have a hard time understanding the people from here.
Anne says:
Hi Ulrike, like I wrote I just heard it from a few people age about 60 I would say but it
sounded more like a pen friend thing so I might be wrong with the exchange for students,
but as I understood it was something that you got the opportunity to do thru school.
Anyways there is a huge gap I would say people around 20 and younger mostly speak very
good English around 30 and older not too many. And around 60 and above also met quite a
few who speak it. I bet if you are hanging around people who seek English speaking friends
youll find a lot of people who speak it really well, just as you will find at the University I
just meant that going to a supermarket/store/restaurant with just speaking English might
not get you very far at least thats how I experienced it but it did make me learn German
in a rapid way
Georgia! Where abouts? I used to go to Savannah all the time as I have very good friends
living in Hilton Head SA. Yes their English differs a lot from what they speak in the North
especially Boston I would say. I like how they say directly instead of in a minute,or
calaboose, and dinner is in the middle of the day. Got so used to it though that when I
went to NY people would comment that I am from the South probably
Jeff Maltz says:

Thank you, Ann. As an English teacher, I know what a queue is. And you are correct about the
Germans who learn English. They learn British English and its standard pronunciation too. In
the United States or Canada as there is no standard English pronunciation as in Australia or
India, South Africa, etc.
jurii says:
At university:
After a good performance (talk, lecture) or as a sign of agreement, Germans dont clap hands,
but knocking with their knukles on the table
Liv says:
Yes! And also as a group greeting, if there is a table of people you need to join, you can
knock your hand on the table to say hi to everyone. Very efficient!
Christopher J says:
TeaGermans have a special tea for everything, just dont put milk in it
Liv says:
True! But I think the ost-Frisians put cream in their tea. Germans on the whole drink a LOT
of herbal tea. I am quietly turning as many people onto black tea with milk, as I can.
Jeff Maltz says:

I think English has too many words, over 300,000, in general, to describe the same things. This
is due to the Norman French and Latin creeping into English in 1066 when the Normans
conquered Britain. On average, English speakers have a working vocabulary of 16,000 words
and educated people have 25,000-30,000.
Modern English would actually be more simliar to German and much easier.
I think in influx of English words into German sounds silly and unnecessary, when there are
plenty of German words to that already describe the same thing.To cite several examples:
gate( at an airport) the German word is Flugsteig or sale is Ausverkauf, suicide for
Selbstmord,hi or hallo for Guten Tag and the list goes on and on. I always use the German
words to describe things in German rather than revert to English, if I can.
I think many Germans and German advertizers(advertisers) think its cool to use English
words in ads, that in many cases sound ridiculous. Older Germans, especially in the former
GDR, learned Russian in school instead of English and its difficult for them to understand
many ads and commercials on television that are loaded with English. West Germans, one the
other hand, had more access to Americans and the American way of life and after
World War 2, they imitated or borrowed a lot of things from the American culture and
language.
German actors and actresses and Promis ,as the Germans call them, use a lot of English words
on television to get the same effect. I just laugh and shake my head.
By the way,Liv, the prefered American accent or pronunciation used by broadcasters in the
USA is Mid-western English. Why? The American public was surveyed in the 1960s, as to what
sort of English sounded the best to their ear. They thought Mid-westerners sounded the best.
Anne says:
Hi Jeff, did you mean by the influx of English words into German.. that people actually use
it?
Because I would rather here a German himself always say ausverkauf or knut after Christmas.
And hallo is a greeting used in many languages and it does not come from English, most
dictionaries say it actually comes from old High German (who would have thought!) . I
would say that in my experience Germans actually love to make there own word for
something, a lot I find is derived from French as well. You are right about Germans finding The
USA cool though, I have seen many adds saying something is American like nails, make-up,
or clothing. Makes me wonder though, North or South,or middle?? It doesnt say haha some
words also are borrowed as there is just no alternative for it I guess, in Dutch you also say
berhaupt we dont have an alternative for it, we also write it the same, although in the
Dutch language you have no alternative for it.
Patty says:
Ja!
James Miles says:

I must dispute the point made at #17 and #18. Germans do not have a successful economy
because they work hard. People work hard everywhere. The German economy is successful
because of its high rate of investment. (Its also why modern China is successful: a very high,
historically unprecedented, rate of investment as a percentage of GDP.) Investment makes your
labour more efficient. This is why Germany overtook Britain in the late 19th century, and
overtook the US after the war. Nothing to do with how hard people work.
Ulrike says:
I have to disagree. I have been working in the US for over 40 years and everywhere I
worked it was the same story. People did often not take coffee breaks, short or no lunch
breaks so that they looked as if they were working a lot. However, all day long they were
talking instead of concentrating on their work and making one mistake after the other.
In Germany, where ever I worked, we actually worked during working hours and we did
our talking and gossiping during coffee break in the morning and afternoon and during our
one hour lunch break. We had time to eat slowly and actually taste our food and plenty of
time to catch up with personal chit chat. When we celebrated a birthday we stopped
working and celebrated, here you get to take a piece of cake, sing happy birthday and go
back to your desk and talk and talk while you try to do some work at the same time and I
could go on and on and on.
I have not been in Germany since 2006 so I do not know if things have changed. The only
change I saw was after my mothers funeral back in 1997 when we visited Ludwigsburg
where I grew up. Everywhere we went we saw women with head scarfs speaking Arabic,
not one German walking around town so we packed our bags and few home.
Stefan Goeres (https://www.facebook.com/stefang2) says:

Yes, I stare! Because I cant believe you entered the hotel dining room with no shirt on.
naty says:
Im studying in Germany and Im so disappointed with my choose. I came here for Erasmus
and since begging I had problems at the University because of the mess!
Nobody had any idea about exchange students, Iv met my German coordinator accidentally!
The professors didnt know how many credit points I will get for their subject : /
1000 websites to everything, instead of put everything together, for language courses one
website, for other courses another website, to write exam the same, MESS!
About German students I never seen something like thins on any other universities. The
people are arrogant and they always think they are the best, if you are better ,you are rival.
I know many students from Brazil, Spain and Italy and they cant understand why Germans
are so cold, cuz they came to their country to learn about their culture but is not possible cuz
Germans keep distance and they dont care about others. Example ? Once my friend asked one
German guy about some footballer, if he know him, he asked Is he German? -No,Cuban So
I dont have to know him , this only one of 1000 examples.
Germans girls are jealous about foreign girls, they just dont like girls. Maybe becouse
because foreign chicas are more beautiful ? I always listen jokes even from GErmans guys
about German girls: they are neglected, with strange hair style, with overweight , bad dressed
and this awful piercing.
My friend from Tunisia is studying here 5 years and since that time she has any German girl
friend, boys friend yes but not girls.
The food Seriously I cant see any sausage anymore, come on! Cabbage,sausage and
schnitzel, ooow I almost forgot about potatoes!
Parties with Germans are the most boring. If I know that some of my friend invited Germans
to party I will take a pillow and pajama with me for the next time. They dont dance, they dont
even try. If they talk, they only talk about bullshits or about future, their plans, university or
homework, plllllssss
Anyway I just cant wait until I finish the studies here, good luck to everyone and advice to
Germans, please Relax, take it easyyyyyyyyyy
piessinger says:
such an ugly, short-sighted reply. really, you do germans wrong. you just made wrong
encounters. Idiots are everywhere. Who is the one, who should relax?
Jeff Maltz says:

I cant believe youre actually a student and studying Erasmus! Is English your native
language? Your spelling,word usage, grammar and snytax are incorrect.
I studied in Germany too, and I enjoyed it very much. I made a lot of friends, dated German
women, went to parties with students and professors and the discotheque to dance. I found
German students to be just as much fun to be with as American students. I had no
complaints about the food, in fact, I liked it. I spoke German fluently too.
Perhaps, its were youre located. I studied in Tbingen and I was a German and English
major.
I would do it all over again, if I could.
Anne says:
Naty, very strange to hear about all the problems at the university
I must say, Im living in Hamburg and had no problems like that, the uni site is very easy to
get thru and when I was looking for language courses and couldnt get a hold of the lady
responsible she actually called me back the next day and helped me out. They never know
how many credit points you will get simply because your university at home has to decide
on that one.
I have had quite a few friends of mine complaining that they didnt get their credit points at
their own university because of program differences (this is also something that is said on
the erasmus site itself).
I wouldnt call the students arrogant just competitive they just dont like to share info or
notes, they think that everyone has to work hard for the grades they get and I dont find
that a bad quality.
I understand that you are coming from a latin country and Germans seem quite coldwell
you should head up to Norway you would go even more crazy and Germans would seem
the warmest, friendliest ever LOL no but for real they may seem and actually I would
agree colder than some other nationalities but they have other qualities and warm up a lot
once you get to know them better, Germans are not that open and spontaneous in the
beginning which does give a cold impression
As far as partying goes, obviously you are spending it with the wrong people well at least
I always had fun on parties here.
True story about girls here though, cant argue on that one, have gotten a lot of dirty looks
myself and friend making is not too easy when you are a possible threat but that does not
count for everyone and I have met a lot of nice girls as well, but there is a weird notion of
girls hating on girls here at least more than I have ever encountered anywhere else.
Naty you are being too negative and I think that once you change your attitude towards
Germans, they will start doing it as well. You are not in Spain/Portugal and its not fair to
not even try and go with the flow here, understand that you are in a different culture, and
for Germans a lot of things you do or say also might be strange or even irritating
Good luck in Germany and hope youll grow fond of it
Zarina says:
Hey Naty,
Im really sorry to hear that you have such an unpleasant experience in Germany. I do
agree with Anne and Jeff that it depends on the university youre attending and the major
you are doing, though. For example, here in Konstanz, when you study law, there is an
introduction for the Erasmus students and there are special advisors for your stay still, it
is not easy like when you have to ask every professor for an exam (we have many classes
with no exams).
The thing with too many websites annoys many German students too, and it is hard to find
out things when you start studying first of course that is even harder when not everything
is translated.
I also want to give you a few tips on how you might have a better experience:
Like it was stated in the list, Germans dont usually start small talk. They keep to
themselves and wont start to talk to you when you dont ask them something. But from my
own experience there are a lot of people who start warming up when you go to them and
tell them that you need help or ask for something. Many will also find your story interesting
and want to talk about your experience in Germany or your home country.
Germans are rather patriotic when it comes to football and food, and many hate it when
they feel like they are being belittled. They are proud and thus can be antagonistic. Try not
to be offended by their directness and find another topic to start about talking about the
weather might be boring, but no one feels offended by it.
Well, I am a German girl and I have to admit that German girl tend to criticise other girls
or not be nice to them. Some might think that girls from other countries are dressed too
sexy or have too much make-up on because it is considered better in Germany to look
natural and anstndig. Try to cope with it also, like Germans in general, they tend to
warm up after they get to know you better.
I am sorry about the food and I think there is rather little variety in typical German food.
Of course you could have had bad luck also, especially if people wanted to show you typical
German food so you ate lots of it. In my experience young Germans love foreign food, so
maybe you could try and cook with them and show them some of the awesome food from
your home. Also, try Kaffee und Kuchen, especially with girls.
About the parties and German students being so competitive: That might result from the
feeling of pressure that many German students have they think they have to finish their
studies as fast as possible or they wont get a good job. Talking about it helps many of them.
I have also heard the complaint about Erasmus students that they do nothing but party all
the time so it is probably just a difference in culture. And I think that you have been to the
wrong parties Im sure you can find Germans that you like and that like you and have a
great time with them!
Well, I really hope these negative things wont be the only experience you take back home,
and I hope you get to enjoy being in Germany (though I have to admit that during winter
everything is a bit more depressing).
grischa says:
this is all so well observed .. we do know how to open a bottle of beer with anything .. i prefer
my eyelid
Hastiktir says:
Most of them is blablabla some are true.

You should have spend your time in bigger cities (Hamburg, Berlin)
Jeff Maltz says:

@hastiktir Most of them ARE blablabla

You should(ought to)have SPENT your time in
Lea says:
Initially, I just wanted to leave a comment to thank you for making me feel good about being
German, but I cant seem to let the preceding comment pass without a comment itself. I do not
think it is at all blabla although there are a few repititions. It is exactly what you call blabla
that is interesting about this list as it concerns itself with the small things, the things that
Germans take for granted and feel so normal about, they would never tell a foreigner when
abroad. It is only through travels and living abroad that Germans get a grip on the idea that
not everyone finds it normal to have a brilliant spargel dinner and enjoy a becks green lemon
with your wrstchen im speckmantel on the bbq. Especially in a country that lacks national
belonging (meaning a healthy and politically correct one) like no.other.country. it is funny and
sweet to learn from a simple list like this that there are things we have in common and that we
share, even if it is just the love for a good bakery.
Dear Liv, I think your choice of cities has been terrific and your points are terrifyingly
reasonable. You are an excellent observer and have made me feel very German in this post.
Germans love Spargel and all I think is.. Ooohh Spargel You have even captured how
regions are more important to us than we admit, as Schleswig-Holsteiners love to find each
other in other parts of Germany and make clear that nobody gets a Schleswig-Holsteiner as a
Schleswig-Holsteiner does.
Well observed an written. I hope you will continue to enjoy Germany!
Matt (http://testroid.de) says:

Wonderful list, laughed quite a lot
91: I think I have to disagree, not too many enjoy football here at all (or watch the world
championship where the world was not invited). If you talk about soccer, on the other hand,
thats more than correct
If you talk about football in Germany, it always means American Football. Fuball would of
course translate directly to football, but is not the same game, thus soccer it is.
DerUmi says:
Interesting observation, because I disagree. I am German (from Hamburg) and as I learned

British English at school, I say football instead of soccer. My british flatmate says
football. If I want to talk about American Football, I would say American Football. I only
use the term soccer when talking to Northern Americans in order to avoid
misunderstandings. But maybe there are regional differences in Germany how to say
Fuball in English.
Anne says:
I agree the word soccer is not really used in Europe.

Actually both should be called football.
The football known to North Americans comes from rugbywhich was called rugby
footballthe game evolved in North America into American football.
Football known to Europeans was called association football, some believe that actually
soccer is a word coming from assoccer then became just soccer.
But no one will say soccer here in Europe or actually in Oz or New Zeeland either, same
for South Africa. Just when we speak to North Americans to keep it easy
@Proud rugby fan!!
coopersonic says:
Co-rrrrrect! (I am a born German, BTW, a Sauerlnder more precisely. A region largely

overlooked by foreign visitors despite its people being more German than most other
Germans. On the other hand its probably explicable because it is so boring
leon says:
I really enjoyed reading your little list you have a very nice way of writing i must admit. I hope
you will continue having a wonderful time in germany or if you already returned will have a
lovely memory. To the point of germans wanting to go to ikea just to eat hotdogs i have to
clearify that while you can get most international goods in almost every bigger city in germany
the hotdog is the only exception. It is damn hard to find a good one! (not saying the ikea one is
good though :/ )
anyways laughed my ass off we really seem to leave a very strange but somehow kind
impression on foreigners
wish you all the best

greetings from Bayreuth
p.s. it is soccer goddamn
Ulrike says:
It is soccer or fussball, Americans do know the word fussball and as far as a hot dog is
concerned, I am assuming you are talking about the American hot dog. It is just as difficult to
get a good hot dog here in the US which is why I like mine with mustard and relish and
whatever else is available, even beans and of course cheese. You can rally only get good hot
dogs at a butcher shop and they are few and far between in the US. We had a very good one in
Nahant, Massachusetts 40 years ago. They never even made it home as we used to eat them in
the car while driving home.
Chris Gimson says:

Wow, disturbingly accurate
Ina says:
I think its sad that you take your obviously subjective and one-time experiences and make
them observations about The Germans. That is so small-minded and just stupid
stereotyping. Im sorry for the ones reading/believing this.
Jens says:
Nope! Not true Just because it is not aplying to you it does not mean it is incorrect :-). Just
look around you next time you go outside to the park with your friends and you will see
that it is true!
coopersonic says:
Boooo! No sense of humour? German? Haha
Oliver Tacke (http://www.olivertacke.de) says:

Ive believed I was German for 34 years. But now, after reading your post, I guess I was wrong
Martin says:
Hi,
I am from Germany and found the website an hour ago.
Suprising: The most is true
Even the point 61: Apropos, Germans will always try and shake your hand, even if you feel
youve reached the status of hugging.
Thanks for the list.
Natalie from Germany says:

Thank you, Liv, for this great post
Id like to share this one with you as I assume you will like it:
You will meet the sausage dog (Dackel) and the different sense of German humor.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qL0P1p5yUuU (http://www.youtube.com/watch?
v=qL0P1p5yUuU)
(caution, 38 minutes)
I could not read all the previous comments yet, so sorry if I am repeating what someone else
has told you earlier.
Mach weiter so!
Ulrike says:
I would like to reply to the hand shaking custom. It used to be that one had to wait for the
older person to extend a hand, the male had to wait for the female to extend her hand, the
lower rank had to wait for the higher rank etc. One would address people by their last name
unless one was told to use the DU instead of the SIE and first name and this tow was done
following the same rule which applies to the hand shake. I wonder if this is still observed
among the younger generation?
I wish things were a little more formal here in the US. I dont like to be hugged and kissed by a
person I just met, but they do this here, Cashiers at the supermarket will address you with
dear or honey and they are teenagers!
Samantha Bhopa says:

Sister lives in Hamburg and got three Herman nieces and nephews. I agree with most of your
statements. Think it would be interesting to see what my German family thinks of this so will
pass it on.
Ralf Gawel says:

Love it..pure genetics..you cannot get a German out of a German, no matter where he lives.
You forgot one major point, which is. We always know better than anybody else!
Ulrike says:
Ralf you are so right. On top of being German I am also Aquarian and Aquarians are also
always right so no one will ever convince me that I am not correct!
Woisit says:
This blog is so true, I almost feel unmasked while reading it!
But you forgot to mention the Prost. Its very important in Germany if u sit together and
drink beer to lift up your glas und look the others into their eyes while prosting (to stay
cheers). Ignoring that is considered rude and somehow they dont do it in other countries.
test (http://gravatar.com/test) says:

Id like to add that the sole reason for the Bratwurststnde in front of Ikeas is to keep the men
out. This way the women have more time for shopping and buy more stuff.
AichHrnchen says:
I am sure that is how a trained strategic management expert would put it (internally)!
Daniel says:
Ive to admit that i almost peed my pants laughing
Great List, Great kind of writing!
I just HAVE to add some small details:
Cars arent just vehicles, they are f**king essential! as you know by surviving the db-sweat-
and-swear-trains
I can Travel faster, and of course MORE TIME EFFICIANT by car! So thats why Im Never late
Unless some camping van moves out on left lane when i am driving 250 Then the
middelfinger-Law has no value anymore
Football is the biggest Church in Germany! There are no catholics or protestants Only
Dortmunder or Schalker Its maybe like northern ireland back in the days
No, just kidding Unless you are a munich Fan and not from Bavaria: die!
I really never realised this staring-Thing, but you are right

But i dont Feel like doing some rude things while looking at others A smile for strangers? Not
in this life! But when the stranger is wearing a Dortmund-Jersey, then he gets thumbs up
Best wishes from near Mnster
Jens says:
Hey there!
I am German myself^^ Best entry about German behaviour I have seen in a looooong time! At
some points i laughed so hard I had to hold my belly :-D. Some points are a bit exaggerated but
all in all it perfectly fits most of the Germans (Not me I hate hiking, camping and stupid
IKEA :-D). Oh and the Bratwurststnde are not to keep the men out they have to come inside
too who is going to carry the bought stuff when they are outside?? ;-). Keep it up and if you
have any question to German behaviour and why we are so weird, just ask me and I will, as
accurate as possible and IF i know the answer, answer every question you have :-).
bavaria! says:
They are extremely good natured when it comes to laughing at themselves (and accepting lists
like the very one youre reading.)
True at all
Roger says:
One thing is definitely missing: No matter how bad the air is in a closed room, how thick the
smoke is in a bar (yes, in some parts of Germany you are still allowed to smoke), the moment
someone opens a window and the slightest movement of air happens, you can be 100% certain
someone will call out Es zieht! meaning someone feels the fresh air being uncomfortable or
even health threatening.
coopersonic says:
Es zieht! = theres a draft (of air).
coopersonic says:
Oh yes, Germans like to be smart-arses and clever dicks.
Funky says:
Hehe wie wahr, wie wahr:-D
Anna says:
To the unspoken rule of Eat Now, Talk Later: I call it Gefriges Schweigen. Dont know if
this is a common word for that or my invention.
V says:
As a German living in Australia I really agree on point 58. Even after more than half year I am
still embarrassed when being asked how are you today at the supermarket check-out.
Luckily you can find a self check-out in nearly every supermarket down here, so Germans can
avoid these awkward situations ;).
Marie says:
Im German and yes its right!
Briedis (http://gravatar.com/lantreprise) says:

Come on !! French are much better
jana says:
first, i thougt, this is ironic. or is it? well, you lived in bavaria, baltic sea and mnster, that are
NOT quite reprensentative for all Germans. ive read this and thought, you look quite surfical
and clich. go to more cities and regions and look more intense! talk to people! you will find a
lot of this things not true! some things are good looked but i only agree about 20 things the rest
is clich and seems you have talked not really with peope or with people who also think all
this clichs!
V says:
So what do you expect when you read a blog called what I know about Germans? A
scientific report on the the most representative characteristics of Germans? Come on, of
course it is the view of an individual based on her own experiences. You should stop
accusing people of being superficial and clich just because they made different
experiences as you. And please, fellow Germans, dont take everything so seriously (another
German stereotype?;))!
coopersonic says:
see no. 105 you and your village feel underrepresented, or what?
Shelling says:
I wonder if u heard, that Bavaria doesnt belong to Germany at all xD (its practically a joke,
but it has some points)
Bavaria had a King till 1918 (end of the first WW), they want the kingdom back, they doesnt
speak German (Bavarian) xD. Someone from Hanover or Lneburg Heath, which speak High
German, can barely understand Bavarian.
And yeah, i disagree with some points, but the most of them are right. btw. we dont worship
the pig, pig is just much cheaper than beef. I dont know anybody who like meat, would choose
pig instead of beef, if the prices werent too different.
H-Peter Runge (http://yahoo/rogers) says:

NO BODY KNOWS.de German Migrunt and his problems with the

***CANADIAN-GERMAN INCOME TAX TREATY***
-everybody just sucks it up-
NO T4As, T5s, etc documents
to file foreign income or property
NOne of their business
NOW!
Thats loyalty to.de Vaterland!!!!!
Regards, PeteR.dePruzz

HOW CAN YOU POSSIBLY MODERATE THE TRUTHS!

-have you ever talked to a German Migrant
ueber alles in der Welt!
-in any of Germanys diaspora, such as ***Kolonia KaNOdO!
German Migrants used to Canadian Citizens, for instance;
-now, mere German DP MyGrunts!
-they, too, are now STILL Germans! aGain! TO WHOM!
When you, try to, enlighten.de world about anythink germaniac,
start with CE-1054-Ad! -PERHAPS- explain.de Frankish States:
The Dukedom of Tripoli,
The Dukedom of Edessa,
The Principality of Antioch,
The Kingdom of Jerusalem; et al!
How did they come to be
AND what was there BEFORE the First Crusade!

3. Person Plural, ONLY!

In Canada, at work; Hi Christine! Wie gehts!
In Canada, at Church, Hi Christi
Ich wuesste nicht, dass wir uns duzen!
Michael Briel (https://www.facebook.com/michael.briel.9) says:

Hah! This is brilliant.
Liz Jones says:

Awesome reading!!! Laughed so much!!! My future go to read next time Im having a bad
day!!
Nicole Sch. says:

I really enjoyed reading this article. I laughed and for the most part I though she hit the nail
right on the head (I am a Bavarian by the way
Suzanne garrett says:

Germans love a good schnapps or glass of ouzo after a large meal. The best self made firework
displays ever. They get stress ice on Monday and Thursday at aldi and lidl when the new sales
start. They always know the names of each of the wide selection if breads and brotchen at the
backerei. The double cheek kiss. Markets
Michael (http://Web.de) says:

Interesting
Bernhard (http://www.floatliner.net) says:


yes
i like it to be a German
Jimbo says:
Ach! Mon-hey.Wo ist mein Leberkase und Semmel?
Bracha says:
Lovely. Could think of a few more
hmhr says:
Like any other list about any nationality there might be some true facts on it. But generally
speaking, 99% of that list suits to 1% of all Germans.
coopersonic says:
No. 152: Germans LOVE to indulge in utterly useless but nevertheless sincere (and seemingly
endless) commentary conversations over a clearly satirical and humorous article.
Bljstek says:
there are a few things that are not true in this blog. 1. sauerkraut is by far not as much
cosumed and as popular as the clichs say. 2. in the summer almost every normal person in
germany wears shorts or skirts or something similar. 3. nowadays dner is way more popular
than bratwurst. and all these points do not only apply to berlin but for the whole country.
Bljstek says:
another thins is, that breakfast habits are very various in germany, many germans like a
sweet breakfast with marmelade, zuckerrbensirup, frischkse, cornflakes/kellogs,
kakao/milk, and you clearly missed the german love for NUTELLA.
Jeff Maltz says:

I would disagree about the bratwurst and dner. I live in Thringen and we make the best
bratwurst in Germany! You havent eaten real bratwurst, unless youve had a Thringer
Bratwurst. There are also more bratwurst stands than dner at the Christmas markets and
festivals all over Germany, The bratwursts reign over dner. A Dner( or Gyro) is also Turkish
or Greek, and not German
Ulrike says:
I am so glad to read your explanation. The last time I was in Germany we tried a Doener
and I was not impressed, a Bratwurst is sooo much better but that was in 2006. All I have
heard since from the younger Germans here around Atlanta was that the Doener is
Germanys national dish, thank God you are setting people straight. I also did not know that
Gyros and Doeners are the same thing, I thought they tasted similar but was not sure.
Halit Batuk says:

thanks god someone sad dner is turksh. Come on people even dner is a fully turksh
word how dare you say t s german!!!
Lynn Ressler (https://www.facebook.com/lynn.ressler.1) says:

Thank you, you may have just saved my marriage. I am a Canadian woman marrying a
German man who is 44 and only been in Canada for 7 years. Now I get it, ahhhh now I get it.
They are just that way.
Liv says:
Of ALL things people have said to me about this list, saving a marriage is possibly my
favourite.
Sascha says:
Not sure if anyone has pointed it out yet, but Germans actually love smalltalk, at least where I
live, especially older people, but even young people too. They can talk about the most
redundant things at length. Anyway, great list and almost everything is more or less true and I
was laughing hard many times!
Ramona Maetzing (https://www.facebook.com/rmaetzing) says:

Yep. They sure can!
Hans268 says:
Your list is great. Im from Bavaria which is actually a different Country (in our opinion) and i
totally agree with the most things on it.
Irina (http://www.sewandthecity.blogspot.com) says:

Fabulous! Had to laugh a few times. Comming from Britain where people know a thing or two
about queueing it hasnt ceased to amaze me what happens when another till opens! Oh, and
all those winter jackets
Niklas Schelten says:

well I am German guy and I love this awesome list, I guess ist fits perfectly to us in general.
Danny Christ (http://www.sea-hc.com) says:

AWESOME! I love it. True and funny!
Nadine (http://romantiqueandrebel.com) says:

Im a Berliner married to an Aussie, living in London. I can relate to most of the points on the
list, hehe. I would like to add that Germans like to complain a lot though. About their oh-so-
long hard working days (shortest in Europe), about their health system (GOLD compared to
UKs NHS), about the weather, etc.But I must admit I was the same until I moved to the UK
and realised how lucky we Germans are.
Check out my reverse post on a German living in London..:-)
http://romantiqueandrebel.com/you-know-you-are-a-german-living-in-london-if/
(http://romantiqueandrebel.com/you-know-you-are-a-german-living-in-london-if/)
Ulrike says:
You are so right, they should check out the health care system in the US, it stinks yet so
many people here still complain about Obamacare instead of being happy they will be
getting better care!!!
I dont remember Gemans complaining a lot but I do remember the sentiments regarding
changing something that is not working or just not fair or good contrary to the American
thinking my daughters generation has: When they should be outraged about something
they say, there is nothing we can do and when I reply that other countries are doing better
the answer always is well this is America and things cannot be changed.
Ulrike says:
Just checked out your post about living in London, love it. I never lived in London but
visited quite a few times and a friend of mine was from England living in London so we
talked about a lot back in the days when we were young!
Anne says:
Hey Nadine, actually Germans do have one of the longest working days in Europe, I know
that if you compare it with the UK it seems short, it is still a whopping 40 hours a week
though! When you compare them to their neighbouring country The Netherlands (where I
am from) they actually work longer and for less money.
Most of them work longer then their contract says and they are not always getting paid for
the over hours they are doing. They also seem to find it very normal to stay longer at work
if required which would be funny in Holland (at least if it would happen almost every day)
The health system is also slightly worse, although nowadays I dont know if any EU country
has a high quality one They do love to complain though but I get it haha!
Jennifer says:
I. LOVE. IT. Im a German immigrant in the US and I cracked up laughing while reading!!! In
my office we are 3!! Germans and we could hardly stop laughing . You have a wonderful
sense of humor!! Thank you Liv!
Renee Martin says:

en temps que touriste, multi-visite en Allemagne, ceci est un portrait reprsentatif assez exact
de ce peuple mon avissehr gut !
crackedstone says:
I think theres one important point that should be high up on your list: Germans are obviously
interested in lists created by foreigners talking about how peculiar, rigid and unlikable they
are. Definitely a unique trait!
exkrabbenpuler says:
The list is nothing but the truth!

A German reader
Sailing Crew Member (http://nomadicliving.com) says:

Very interesting observations. Just keep in mind that Germany is a vast and culturally very
diverse country. Things you observe in Bavaria will most certainly not be the case other parts
of Germany. Its like going to Scotland and report back your observations about British people.
But anyway, it was an insightful read, even for a German.
Liv says:
You are spot on I come from a vast and culturally diverse country myself, so absolutely
appreciate the need to keep that in mind. I must say, though, I actually wrote a lot of this list
while living in NRW, a little bit more in Bavaria, and a little bit more in Schlesweig-Holstein
Ive been lucky enough to live in three states, so that has helped shape my German view.
Ramona Maetzing (https://www.facebook.com/rmaetzing) says:
Youve obviously never visted Dortmund if you find all Germans well-groomed or very
hospitable! I enjoyed reading your list, but found it very interesting that I had the opposite
experience as you for many of these during my seven years here. I am tired of German small
talk, actually. If I here any more talk about the weather I will scream! Still, sooo much of what
you say is true. The hand shaking thing especially. I finally had to tell my mother-in-law I
didnt want to shake her hand all the time. The Bratwurst thing!! Best of luck with your
book. Ill definitely look into it.
Sandra E. says:
I am from Germany and I really enjoyed reading this since I can definitly laugh about myself
and my people! Had to laugh a lot since there are so many points that remind me of what is
part of my daily life if I like it or not (hate that Germans are not able to queue for example!).
Some things must seem ridiculous if you are not used to it.. like the run to an opening cashier
like a crazy herd of cattle. But at some points I thought Oh no where does she have this
from? especially when it comes to the good old clich Germans love David Hasselhoff. I
mean what the h..?!
Also an awkward and sadly true thing: Germans dont like it when you go against the tide in
the supermarket. Indeed this seems to be an unspoken rule. I dont care much about it and
sometimes feel like a rebell when I break it and some people (most are over 50) look at me like
they wanted to say Why are you disturbing our little supermarket peace? Shame on you!
No matter if I agree with all of these points I still had a good time reading and hope that the
Germans positive qualities are outweighting the negative ones for you.
Cheers Sandra
Shiatsu Massageauflagen (http://www.stuhl-massageauflage.de) says:

o my goodness, you should have spent more time in germany If you read this as a foreigner
you will get an overview but like in every other country there are ecceptions! A lot
ecceptions!!!
even such ecceptions dont like the behaviour of your show typical german we accept this
as a kind of variation every nation has so what woud misses in your list is, we are extremly
tollerant, but the small groups of nazis every country has in its society, unfortunattely.
Markus (http://www.toys-planet.de) says:

Very funny List:-) I agree as a German with a lot of points;-)
Ruzi the Spider says:

I l grew and live in Germany, but am of spanish decendace, so I inherited both cultures. I really
enjoyed this list and can assure you most of it really IS true. Where I personally fail is
punctuality, worshipping bureaucracy, 90s pop music and Wurst. (Its hard to resist a Schnitzel
though.) I also like my feet naked. PS: I so laughed at loving Dackel because they look like
Wurst, opening beer cans with bananas and the celebrating of Spargelzeit (grew in
Weiterstadt, surrounded by Spargel, in Spargelzeit we had variations EVERY DAY) btw dont
forget about 5th station of the year: Fasching (carneval)! Also: Whats it with Chibo?
Jens says:
As a german, who is ashamed of this fact: Germans are clapping on one and three in nearly
every song, instead of the cool two and four. Im sorry for that!
Jerome Dahdah (http://jeromedahdah.com) says:

Fantastic list, so much truth here. I was laughing all the way through! I do so many of those
things even though I spent most of my childhood growing up outside of Germany. It really rubs
off on you.
You missed one: Germans have a weird obsession with paprika flavoring. 80% of all chips in
the supermarket are paprika flavored.
Ulrike says:
Thats because everything tastes better with Paprika!!!
Eckart Burgwedel (http://gravatar.com/eburgwedel) says:

Liv, this is so mind-boggelingly well observed! Being a German myself, I could simply see truth
in almost every single line. In fact, I even realized things about myself that should have been
obvious but werent. Thank you, an utter pleasure to read!
angline gras says:

Its too bad that people have to generalize all the time! Im sooo tired of clichs. And most of
these facts are actually true for many countries in Europe..Im not german but living in
Germany and most of it is reallly just generalization, unfortunately.
Pat says:
Go for Kaffee und Kuchen !

I am German and living in Holland for more than 10 years. The Dutch are giants, bikes are
everywhere but no Kaffee and Kuchen ! The Dutch and Germans are neighbours but
soooooo different !
wunnspeed (http://wunnspeed.wordpress.com/) says:

I found the ever growing list to be quite entertaining and quite on target for the most part.
Maybe its different where you live but #9, as someone who spends thousands of kilometers on
a bike each year I find exactly the opposite. Mind you, I think its fantastic that a large
portion of the Germans ride bikes but having said that, for people whove often ridden since
before they could walk, theyre some of the worst bike riders Ive ever seen anywhere in the
world! They are the German equivalent of American auto commuters. By that I mean that they
do everything but pay attention to riding their bike. They smoke, talk on their phones, hold
their umbrellas, drink coffee (sometimes simultaneously) and then they veer to and fro as
though no one else is around (of course they do that walking too). I could go on but you get the
idea. Thanks for making the list though, Ive shared it on Facebook in the past.
Lydia says:
So true!! I can just agree to my previous writer!! haha
Tara says:
raw meat? Im sorry but raw meat? I have never heard of anyone eating that kind of stuff and
where I live it is considered pretty dangerous O.o nobody I know does it, luckily. to the
sauerkraut: it is definitely not as often consumed as you make it seem here. I dont like it
from the people I know, only my father and grandmother actually eat it.^^; I dont even know
where you can buy that stuff
I dont approve of people generalising a whole country, even if it is done in a cute and funny
way. I dont enjoy camping and I personally do not stare at people and consider people who do
stare as rude.
to #147: haha xD its like shouting encore. we do that to make the musician perform
something else.
I like how nice you write about those little things you noticed in Germany, but please dont
generalise.
Cailean says:
Honeybunny, surely youve heard of Thringer Mett and Mettigel or even Tartar aka
Schabefleisch. If not, give back your citizenship.
As for the rest of critisism. How do you know that Sauerkraut, no matter where in Germany,
isnt consumed more than in the rest of the world or in this case Australia. Btw you can buy
Sauerkraut in a supermarket, even Aldi sells it.
About the generalisation let me totally ungeneral tell you to step off your high horse. Maybe
your reading comprehension will get better that way. Here is a hint: Stuff Germans do is not
equal to stuff ALL germans do. Get it?
rmaetz (http://gravatar.com/rmaetz) says:

Yeah. I was going to say Mett is raw and my husband eats it often.
Tilo says:
You forgot Nutella!! How can you forget Nutella?? Germans. Love. Nutella!
Jeff Maltz says:

mmm es gibt nichts Leckeres als Thringer Mettwurst mit gehackten Zwiebeln und frisch
gemahlten Schwarzpfeffer auf einem frischen Krbiskernbrtchenbin im siebten Himmel!
Nothing can beat the taste of a fresh pumpkin seed roll spread with Thringer Mettwurst and
chopped onions and freshly ground black pepperits delicious.
Ulrike says:
I have not had Mettwurst in many many years, I think I have to order it thru German Deli.
However, I can get various German and Polish sausages and cold cuts here in Georgia
including Teewurst. Which one is raw meat? I also dont understand why so many people
think it is awful to eat raw Wurst. We have been eating Tartar forever and many people eat
Sushi these days.
German says:
If we would start a list of America it would be very short.the main problem of Americans is
that they do not understand anything but they think they are greati laugh about them
Ulrike says:
Well let me tell you how very wrong you are about the list being short. I was 28 when I
came to the US and lived in New England, Boston area, for about 40 years and now live in
the South, Georgia that is. There are always lists you are a Yankee if.. or you are a Red
Neck if,going around and they are just as funny as this list about Germans and I could
add lots and lots of observations to both the Yankee and the Red Neck list but I dont think
the Americans would laugh unless they thought it was written by an American and that
would probably be my first point!
Karl-Heinz Freund says:

Was ein dummes Zeug. Deutsche sind Menschen wie berall auf der Welt, Sie Lieben, sie
lachen, sie weinen, sie haben gefhle und sie haben ihre Kultur, wie alle anderen Menschen
auch ihre Kultur haben. Wie gesagt, der ganze Mist oben ist arrogant und von dummen
Menschen geschreiben.
Karl
Christine Nitsche says:

Ja Karl und Du solltest dir dieses Buch zulegen und es durcharbeiten Rechtschreiben 2: Das
Selbstlernheft bevor du andere Dumm nennst.
Markus says:
Germans do not like the Netherlands beside the fact they (at least the north west germans) go
there every year for holidays (with their camper and Jack Wolfskin equipment) and they start
hating the duchies in case the topic is Fuball.
Markus says:
Another one: Germans have no idea how to respond to How are you? most probably they
start answering with a very personal conversation about their actual health status.
I love it beside the fact that Im german myself.
Jeff Maltz says:

Mettwurst and Steak Tartar are served raw. Steak Tartar is sometimes served with chopped or
sliced onions and raw egg in the center of a mound of finely ground top quality beef steak.
Mettwurst,on the other hand, is made from pork.
I believe Teewurst and one my favorites, grner Pfeffersack is cooked and then prepared.
Ulrike says:
I never knew that Mettwurst was made with raw pork, must be smoked or something?
Yes Tartar must be served with a raw egg and chopped onions, it is available her in the US
in some restaurants.
I hope I can go back to visit Germany and the few relatives I have left next year. I am
finding out how much has changed with this blog. When my mother was still alive she kept
me up to date on everything with newspaper clippings she used to send me, I miss her still
and her clippings.
Ines says:
I love it, nearly everything true, sometimes not for everyone, but nice and funny to read
Pk says:
Hey, Im a Brit and have lived in Germany for three years and so many of your points are bang
on and made me laugh a lot. I absolutely love living here and I must admit, Id take my hat off
to you for compiling such an awesome list that is both complimentary while at the same time
filled with good natured humour. A couple of things you may want to include in your next
update:
1 The crazed obsession with standing around in large groups, refusing to move for anyone or
anything, during Weihnnachtsmarkt, drinking Glhwein, Kinderpunch (the non-alcoholic
version for kids), or Feuerzangenbowle or anything else that is hot and alcoholic
2 The strange obsession of wearing white socks (pulled up as high as they go) with plastic
sandals. the slightly trendier of the men with leader sandals with Velcros!
3 the above rule applies as well during the few weeks of summer, when every single
person rushes to the nearest Freibad or Lake to sunbath, sunbath and sunbath, milking
every single bit of precious sunshine (very catchy past-time especially for a sun-deprived-
Brit)
4 Their love for spreading butter on bread before applying a generous layer of Nutella!
5 The wonder of the German saunas. where its unusual and often frowned upon to wear
anything more than a towel.
Ulrike says:
Yes I loved Weihnachtsmarkt and when I was in Kassel with family to visit my aunt in the
hospital we used to go to the Weihnachtsmarkt for Gluehwein afterwards and yes we too
stood around in a group and let people walk around us.
The white sock thing is obviously new, well, it was never done in my time in Germany only
by American GIs and there are plenty of Americans here who still do that. Horrible choice
of fashion!
I cannot tell you how happy I was after many years of being deprived of Nutella when I
found it here in America. My grandsons love it too.
Saunas here at the health clubs are the same, one does not go in dressed in more than a
towel and mostly one just sits on the towel.
Ulrike says:
Why should they. I think the American greeting How are you when you never ever want an
answer is a very stupid greeting and I enjoy watching peoples faces in America when I actually
start telling them all about the rotten day or week I am having. They dont know what to do!
Very funny.
I am sure we Germans, as the list makes obvious, have our own quirks and sayings we grew up
with and never think about but in my opinion How are you instead of just Hello is really
annoying, to me anyway.
kiki says:
I love #100!!!! I love the whole list. full stop! not quite so sure about the validity of #136..
especially after youve read some of the comments here..!
Kathrin says:
Some great observations about 90% spot on. I grew up in Germany and have been in Australia
since 82, its amazing how much of the national psyche of a country yo internalise by the time
youre 14! I dont, however agree with the flip flop comment, well at least we had them back in
the 80s and they were called Gummilatschen. Maybe times have changed. Thanks for this
made me laugh.
Jeff Maltz says:

Im not sure how Mettwurst is prepared,but I will ask my Metzger tomorrow when I go
shopping and let you know, Ulrike. When I buy it, it already has chopped onions and
seasonings in it and he makes it fresh.
In regard to Wie gehts? Im not sure how react to the Germans who say no one ever asks
that. I do hear people ask each other all the time: wie gehts or wie stehts? especially with
close friends or on the telephone.
I always ask too or I ask: Ist alles im grnen Bereich? or Alles im Grnen? But, this is limited to
my Freundenkreis and I really want to know how they are doing.
I would not ask someone, whom I dont know: Wie geht es Ihnen ? It sounds rather stilted and
upon just meeting someone for the first time, its silly. If I knew they had been ill, I might ask it
or simply Gehts Ihnen besser?
For Americans, Canadians and Brits its considered polite to ask How are you? and wait for a
short and sweet answer, such as : Im fine. And you? Its not very sincere,but expected or its
protocol.
Christine Nitsche says:

Hi Liv, I am an Australian, who lived in Augsburg (owned a Dackel) for 15 years and married a
German (Bavarian). I think that you have described them to a tea!. Well put <3
Ulrike says:
Yes I know what is expected here in America, after all I have lived here for a long while , but it
is still stupid just like it is more than annoying to be addressed with darling, honey etc by
some 16 year old at the cash register at the grocery store here in the south (Georgia).
I really should do my own list of American habits, maybe some day.
Thank you so much for the info regarding the Mettwurst. I would really like to know how it is
made. Maybe I could suggest to the Polish butcher here to make it also. All the Germans I
know, and I know quite a few, go there and love Patak. There is often a one hour wait and the
line goes way outside the store. I guess the Germans living here have learned how to queue,
including me!
Anne says:
Ulrike, please dont do the peaches wrong here. I have been staying in Georgia for a few
months a couple of years in a row now and have many friends from there and also from
South Carolina.
I have never heard anyone call me honey, Mam would be correct and I cant imagine any
teenagers saying that to an older person in the South. I would say they are the most polite of
all people in the US. But maybe you live closer to a huge City? Also hugging and kissing if
you dont know the person is considered weird, I have had a few situations of people
jumping a bit back or feeling awkward when I would try to kiss or hug them for greetings,
and my friends would be commenting shes from Europe and then they would always
ask me if that is normal in Europe I guess so!!
Where do you live in Georgia?
Was also surprised by what you said about the saunas cause I love them and go almost
every week. When I was in The US no matter where I was I would always receive a funny
costume to wear for the mixed gender saunas, and when you want to go to a wooden sauna
its same gender only and even though you are supposed to be naked the women would
still cover themselves up with their towels but maybe I just went to the wrong places
Ulrike says:
To answer your question, yes, I live in Metro Atlanta but would not consider Atlanta a
huge city. I have to say I dont really know any people from Georgia, most of my
neighborhood is from up north meaning New England, and other countries, same in
my daughters neighborhood. I hang out with neighbors at the neighborhood pool and
belong to a number of German Kaffeeklatsch groups and one meets for lunch, the other
for beer and snacks, the international actually has coffee and cake, a singing group with
mostly German members. I only come in contact with Georgians in stores and
businesses.
As far as dress codes in saunas goes, I have only been in saunas here in the health
clubs we belonged to and they were never mixed gender, not in New England nor in
Georgia I was not even aware that saunas existed in the US by themselves. Interesting.
jack checker says:

Its a lot of touristy stuff here, which isnt true if you a born and raised in Germany. Rothohl
e.g. is a autumn/winter thing, only Dners are using it the year around. The finger in traffic is
600.- 4000.-. Dont know how the author gets the numebr 0f 30.- for traffic vilations, the
parking tickets starts at 10.- and I could go on and on, but its not my time worth. By the way
Im not a German
Steve says:
Every German knows the words to country roads sweet home Alabama and summer of
69!!!! Lol
Tom Rheker (http://facebook.com/tom.rheker) says:

Oh mein Gott juhu echt schn. Ive laughed like ROFL and LOL und so weiter
But, coz I like my language so much its Frhjahrsmdigkeit, forget about the e. =)
VERY GOOD LIST TO LAUGH AND THINK ABOUT (myself and my friends/family the most)
Maxi (http://aussie-maxi.tumblr.com) says:

hahahahah i am german ans ive had some good laughs about this! love it!
Anne says:
Liv! Dont know if anyone else mentioned, but you forgot that Germany is also a service
desert and thats what a lot of them will tell you as well. Got kind of used to it now but I would
get very upset in the beginning when I moved here. Some of the waitresses and store clerks
would be long fired in other countries for an attitude like that
Anton (http://LePaien.de) says:

I have seen my face and Germany in the mirror! and laughed teers!
I forgot how funny we are.

i think thats the point: we are always critically on our selfs; often negative.
so far, so good
what germany needs is a future:
investing in schools, universities and culture.
(by the way: the germans are mad to pay artists. so they cant go on with their work and
build culture)
merkel have no visions for a cultural future.

the culture of common generations seems to be consoum.
THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR ANALYSING US (we love analysing and statistics)
Jeff Maltz says:

@Ulrike I tend to agree with Anne. I have vacationed a lot in the South,mainly in North
Carolina(Outer Banks),South Carolina(Hilton Head), Virginia and Georgia along the East Coast
beaches. I found the people to be genuinely friendly and polite in the stores and restaurants.
In Pittsburgh,PA ,where I come from, we tend to call peoplehun or honey. I always called
my wife hun or honey as a term of endearment.
But in stores, people call each hon, pronounced HUN as sign of friendliness and considered
polite. A waitress might ask: What can I get you, hun? or How may I help you ,hun?, or I might
ask: Hey Hun,Can you please bring me another cup of coffee? And when she brings it:
Thanks ,hun. I would never do this outside of Pittsburgh.
At age 62 Im flattered when people call me hon. Its just our way of being friendly. This is
between men and women only. I would never tell say that to a male waiter,but women use it
among themselves. It also not considered sexist.
I am also flattered when older women ask me: Can you help me ,honey?
Speaking of waitresses, Im confused as to what to call a waitress in Germany these days.

When I was student (over 40 years ago) and worked as a waiter in Stuttgart, we simply said
Frulein and Herr Ober. Today, I was told Frulein sounds degrading or is impolite. I think,
Hallo or waving ones hand to a waitress to come to the table is impersonal.
Can any native Germans help me out here? Can one say: Frau Ober or is there any alternative.
In restaurants I have also watched people to hear what they do. They seem to wait until the
waitress comes to the table or go find her. Young waiters and waitresses tend to introduce
themselves in some places or have a name tag to identify who they are.
Can you say simply say: Frau? I asked my German friends in Thringen and no one seems to
be sure what to say. All I ever hear from them is, Frulein is discriminating.
I also the USA has overdone the words wait-staff, server, wait-person and the like. They all
sound so silly. I personally think server sounds demeaning as the German word Diener oder
Dienerin I still use waiter and waitress or I address them as: Sir or Maam.
Anne says:
@Jeff,
I was also quite surprised that fraulein isnt actually used anymore.
It is supposed to be a feminist thing, where by some women it was considered offensive.
Its not really offensive because its the equivalent of the word miss which just indicates that
one seems young and unmarried, right.
It is not really found offensive when you would say it being 62 of age (not trying to be
offensive as well )
Your age brings a bit of luck with you as you can say junge damen and that is considered
polite and correct.
I have heard people say bedienung as well which seems to be ok (funny thing in other
languages that would be considered offensive not miss) and I can not really get that one out
of my mouth
What I find funny about this whole fraulein is offensive facade is that I always hear
Germans say doktorin or verkauferin which also could be a labelled as sexist.
http://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frulein (http://de.wikipedia.org/wiki/Frulein)
This link might help you a bit
Jeff Maltz says:

Thanks,Anne! As I live in Thringen, I thought it might have something to do with the former
DDR. But when I asked people from here, no one seemed to have a concrete answer. Some
people did tell me Bedienung,but I find thats more degrading than Frulein. It makes me
think of a servant. My friends from Nrdlingen in Franken(aka, Bavaria) told me they still say
Frulein and theyre my age. Perhaps, someone here will have the answer.
Ulrike says:
I have to put my two cents in. First I was 28 when I left Germany, I had lived there 24 years
during the post WWII times and was part of the Wirtschaftswunder. In my mid 20ies I was a
single mother and very much resented to be addressed as Fraeulein as this really refers to
young virgins. Look it up in history books. As a professional I also resented this form of
address as it tended to put women below men back then and most of my friends around the
same age used Frau as an acceptable title, after all there was no equivalent to Fraeulein for
boys.
Now when I came to America the term Miss was equally offensive but then someone came up
with Ms. Its pronunciation is awkward but it has remained in use. In the past in the USA all of
a womans possessions, money, property etc. automatically became the property of the
husband upon marriage and he became the head of the household and therefor the only one
to make decisions etc. etc. So for these reasons I would never use word Fraeulein, of course not
having been in Germany since 2006, I cannot remember what the proper form of address is
and would be interested to find out
When I came here in the 70ies that law was still on the books. I never checked to see if there
was a similar law in Germany now or in the past. Can anyone tell me?
Julian says:
Nice list. Very nteresting seeing the view of your own culture in the eyes of a foreigner.
The whole thing about the different ways of greeting and such phrases like visit me anytime
and saying hello can for all foreigners be put into this simple to remember rule:
We Germans are DIRECT and LITERAL
Its that simple. When someone asks me Wie gehts dir/Ihnen then I am assuming he wants to
know that and then I will tell him. I will tell him how I am feeling, if I have aches, whether I
had any illnesses recently etc. If some one tells me that I could visit him or her if i want then i
might VISIT SOMETIME. Its really that easy. Is not like you cannot use these phrases like in
your language, but expect the corresponding reaction.
Dont ask a German how he is unless you want to know HOW HE IS
Greetings from Stuttgart
Jeff Maltz says:

@Ulrike. I was told by friends in Hannover toward the end of the1970s, that all woman in
Germany were now refered to as Frau, whether they are married or not. I did address an older
German woman(over 70) once with Frau and immediately informed me: Ich heie Frulein
Braun und bin nicht verheiratet. I replied:Verzeihung, Frulein Braun, ich wollte Sie nicht
beleidigen.
Ive also noticed nowadays mostly the under 30s crowd use first names very quickly. People
my age(62) have also been quicker to use first names,especially at parties or a small
Kaffeeklatsch and duzen. Mein Metzger and seine Frau haben mich auch neulich geduzt,
und ich kenne sie schon seit 13 Jahren. In meinem Dorf duzen mich auch,. Wir haben etwa 210
Einwohner.
Ulrike says:
Well, I am 72 now but I always was a little ahead of my time. In Germany I was the only
female in all the clubs I belonged to to have her own car at 21 (You could not get a license
back then before 21), in America I was the first woman to join a Karate school and a health
club with Nautilus equipment in my early 30ies and when I decided to go back to university
I was the oldest person among 18 and 19 year olds. I was also the only married woman in
our yacht club to know as much about sailing and engines as the men did. So maybe I
should keep my opinions to myself as they usually are not the norm, no wonder I dont
really fit in here in the South.
Lotta says:
Swedish actually have the word for spring time fatigue as well; vrtrtthet. But it probably
comes from the German language
Mathias says:
I am German. Point 100 (new queue in the supermarket) seems logical. We have a saying Weg
gegangen Platz vergangen. It means, if you give away your place in the queue (by leaving it),
you lose it. If you go to a new queue, that is like moving to a new country or starting a new
relationship. You have to start from scratch.
People who are far ahead in a queue, will not change the queue anyway, because they already
have invested some time. If you change the queue, this time was basically wasted.The last
person in a queue will be the first to change queues, because he has invested the least time so
far.
Lisa says:
Heartbreaking!! haha The observations as well as the discussion! *juhu*
Ole (http://gravatar.com/silencer81) says:

And its still viral, came here via Facebook Great list, laughed out loud through the entire
list Im from Germany and have visited Australia last year, but sadly only for three weeks
(from Sydney up to Cairns) so not enough time for a list like this one, but it helps to
understand why some things must be (or must have been!?) really strange for you
Will read more of your Blog later, seems it could be very funny and interesting
Diotima says:
Germans love Dackels (Dachshunds) and seem to own several of them at once. Perhaps this
adoration of Dachshunds stems from their physical similarity to wurst.
When I read this sentence you rose into my personal olympus. Although I dont speak and
write English very well I just can feel your abilities to write creating pictures with a clear,
simple (in a positive sense) and nuanced language. Fantastico!!!! And despite of the fact that
the list What I dont like about Germany is missing I must say that you seem to be person
able to open her eyes and heart as well as to feel the soul of a country, a nation if something
like that exists at all. Thank you.
Eva Tho (https://www.facebook.com/eva.tho.9) says:

Beautiful observations of my people. Which, not all of them I am in agreement with, but
thats because I am German and some are clearly tainted by the localities you have lived
in.haha, that was such a German statement to point out the negativeI have lived in the US
for over 10 years and you know what ? I know better now (even though I still hate to get in a
queue) You are right on! You made me smile and share your list with my friends here, so they
find me a little less weird. Thank you for that!#65: if you could add that we hold that record
while packing our own bags
Eva.
Eleanor Clemons says:

Since I married into a double German family these observations are in some small ways
accurate according to the parents but not always the children which gives me quite the laugh.
Yet some things here are true of the children and not the parents. It dies help to explain a few
things that I wasnt aware ofand maybe help to explain some of the character qualities of the
parents as wella sthe children.
Eleanor Clemons says:

Does help to explain.
Jeff Maltz says:

I think youre right. There is a certain fascination about World War 2,because many of us
who were born after the war, didnt experience it and understand the tragedies of war. I
am proud to be of German descent and my family was too. Should the Germans today
bear the guilt of the past ? No. Most of those who committed those atrocities are dead
and most Germans were not aware these atrocities were taking place.
Germans should be proud to be Germans, just as British people are proud to British,or
Italians are proud to be Italians. Guilt? Why? We didnt commit these crimes against
humanity. Germany has contributed so much more good to the world through science
and technology, music, art, literature, religion, and the list goes on. We should never
forget the past, but we ought to look forward to a peaceful and thriving future.
Staevart says:
I agree with Jeff completely. While living in Germany, I found it interesting at how little
patriotism the German people exhibited. On Tag der Deutsche Einheit no flags, no special
ceremonies, no celebrations. Even in daily life, I never saw a national flag on a flagpole in
front of a private residence.
That may be changing however, While watching the TV news reports about visitors to the
Summer Olympics in London, I was pleased to see German fans with the Schwartz-Rot-Gold
painted on their cheeks and many of them carrying German flags. Perhaps these were the
initial signs of Germans becoming proud of their country.
tandorf says:
Ive seen many EU flags in front of private homes which is the actual country rather than
the state.
ConCon says:
As a Mnsteraner who lived also in Berlin and in Schwabenlndle for a long time, I can see
the many different german characters that are mentioned on the list. But I dont know
whether you would find so many croosers with kids at other parts of germany than Mnster.
And I have never had a Rostbraten in NRW as well but I enjoyed the special swabian kitchen
when I lived there. Therefore, many thanks for this list where I can find a lot of typical
german attitudes as well as some very special regional ones
roy says:
They sunbathe naked in many of the city parks in Berlin, many of the lakes are filled with
naked people, it is totally natural to them and only foreigners tend to stare.
Hannah says:
This is hilariousand so true! I am a German myself and laughed until I cried. What you have
to know is That People Living in NRW (like me) dont Really like Bavarians and dont want to
be compared to themhaha!;)
Georg Warnecke (https://plus.google.com/113167990127157575116) says:

about 104.
never heard about stefan raab what is that?
Denise M says:
I really did enjoy this! Most of it is so true an even if its not its still so funny! I had to laugh
about most of it and when it came to the point with laughing about ourselves i couldnT hold it
because i do it all the time. Im from a small village near Frankfurt and I love Mett. Especially
when I had a lot of the good german beer and I really do enjoy Schlager, though Im only
19 years old. And I loved the thing about the Dachshund, I have always loved them and now I
finally know where this fascination came from!^^
I think you have to come visit Hessen, its grat and the people do like their Apfelwein there, if
you havent tried yet, you really missed something! I would really like to meet you, someone
who can write something as funny as this can only be a great person!
But for some of the things I think I would also have made a great Australian, as for the
punctuality thing especially.. I somehow like to take my time..^^
I must say you made my day!
Indra says:
I loved this post. Being German or somewhat German born and raised here, but being
originally from Indonesia.
I laughed so hard tears filling my eyes
sChen says:
you have observate good and nice to see that people find my little hometown
hope you have enjoy germany a lot
inkygurl44 says:
I am German and havent read all of it yet because I got upset with #91. it is incorrect and
needs to be corrected ASAP lol.Germans do not play footballwe play and love
SOCCER.football is not FussballFussball is SOCCER lol..so please go back and fix itno
football in germany!!! just soccer lol
Phil says:
Chill out! It was a direct translation. Maybe this should be read Germans love Soccer and
most detest American Football (best they dont understand it!)
Jeff Maltz says:

Hallchen, inkygurl44, vielleicht is Dein English etwas Falsches oder SIe haben es falsch
verstanden. In den englischsprachigen Lndern ausserhalb der USA und Kanada nennt man
Fuballfootball. Football heit nur in den USA und Kanada soccer, sonst nirgendwo, Nr 91
ist ganz richtig und man soll sie nicht sofort ndern. Amerikanischer Football ist doch etwas
ganz anders. Wohnen Sie noch in Deutschland or jetzt in Amiland? Schauen Sie mal die
Football Tabelle fr England.
Es gibt auch heutzutage eine Amerikanischen Football Liga fr viele Grostdte. Ich habe mir
die Spiele im deutschen Sportkanal angesehen.
MondbasisAlphaEins says:
Metropole, Bollwerk des Provinzialismus Bierce
So ist es berall, das was mit Weltstadt gemeint ist sind meist kommerzielle Einrichtungen
der Gastronomie, Geschickt vermarktete Kulissen zum Gelderwerb anderer, Wer darauf
anspringt macht sich zum Touristen auf dem eigenen Kiez und wundert sich ber den faden
Beigeschmack, der irgendwann bleibt.
Die Beobachtungen aus Australien sind ansonsten ganz nett treffen aber in der einen oder
anderen Form auf jedes andere Land auf der Welt zu.
Bis auf die Effizienz und die funktionierende Verwaltung (bedingt durch die geringe
Korruption). Das ist nordeuropisch und in Holland, Schweden, Dnemark Schweiz ebenso zu
finden.
Sascha (http://berlinonbike.de/blog) says:

Something to work on regarding #101 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_TSa5DiUm4g

(http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_TSa5DiUm4g)
Laura (http://www.talesfromfaraway.wordpress.com) says:

2 May, 2014 at 6:55 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-germans/what-i-
I AM GERMAN and I can confirm that every single point on this list is true! At least for some
parts of our country. Thanks for this great collection, I had to laugh so hard. You made my day
Irmhild says:
4 May, 2014 at 12:19 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-germans/what-
Lovely article, as a German living in Ireland, I often visit home and notice lots of the points of
your list!
But I know few women under the age of 50 who would wear socks with sandals, ever!
ishmael savant says:

8 May, 2014 at 8:34 am (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-germans/what-i-
Having lived here ( Bavaria) for 15 years i have to say that a lot of points on this list are just
untrue. Jaded, lazy observations on the whole. Their babies are beautiful, give over will you,
cabbage patch features morelike.You say they are frank and honest people? but 3 or 4 points
later you intone that they dont tell you to your face when you break a supermarket rule, cant
have it both ways, two-faced is another way of saying that surely? Stuff like this actually makes
me angry because you claim to have observed all of these points but obviously all you want to
do is sell a pulp publication based on nothing. They are mostly immature people with no
understanding of anything outside of their comfort zone, most Germans are fairly smug self-
centred individuals with little or no awareness of the needs of others. Try sharing a pavement
with them. Nonsense stuff.
Jeff Maltz says:
@Ishmael, If you were so unhappy in Germany and called the Germans smug and self
centered, why did you stay so long in Bavaria?
Why didnt you just pack up and leave, if it was so bad, and go back to where you came
from ?
You seem to have a very negative, critical and self-centered attitude.
I love living here in Germany and have a lot German friends. I treat all people as I want to
be treated and with only few exceptions, the Germans have been very nice to nice. Although
I am also a foreigner(German-American) and I can speak German as well as the Germans
with a slight accent.
I was taught as the Germans are: You do something right the first time, so you dont have to
do it again or you keep doing it until you get it right.
The only really big difference, Ive noticed, is that German men dont like to admit they
made a mistake or were wrong and they dont apologize for it. When they dont, I remind
them, and then I get asort of apology, but no one seems to admit they were wrong! But, I
also have an easy going personality and I tend to not take life or myself to seriously.

8 May, 2014 at 9:51 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-germans/what-i-
When I lived in Germany from 1946 to 1970 and when I visited twice a year for about another
10 or 12 years I never saw anyone wearing socks with Sandals. I only saw that when I came to
America in 1970. Of course, Irmhild, I lived in Schwaben and visited Hessen so if this was done
in another part of Germany I apparently did not notice. I have not been to Schwaben since
1997 when my mother died and when my aunt died in 2006 that was my last visit to Hessen so
I am a little out of date as to what is customary lately.

Yes it is very difficult to find Dry Riesling in America. This is because Americans like
everything very sweet.I dont know why they like French wines as they tend to be very dry and
were very very dry in the past. I guess it is because they were told that French wine is good
and if you want to be known as sophisticated you should like French wine.
Anyway, one can find, occasionally, a dry Riesling like Pacific Rim but they are not as good as
What is sold in Germany.
Jav says:
At least here in Ingolstadt Bavaria, Germans absolutely LOOVE sandals and flip flops, to be
bare feet, as soon a sun ray shows they wear them
Gregske says:
18 July, 2014 at 10:10 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
Well I am an English man who has just moved to Hamburg. And most of this is bulls*it and
exaggerated. Who can drink 57 shots? I went to the park today in 25 degrees and most people
were in bikinis and the guys topless. The whole rushing to a newly opened till at the check out
happens everywhere. People jaywalk as you call it frequently. I am guessing by your
American? If not, I apologise. You have probably based this whole ridiculous list on a handful
of people. So easy for you to stereotype. Why cant you accept that people are individuals? I
must write a load of ill informed crap and maybe I will get published too
Diana says:
20 August, 2014 at 5:37 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
Its right on!!!!! I am German, and all of these things are soo true!!
Mathias (http://www.yoink.de) says:

30 August, 2014 at 11:19 pm (http://www.livhambrett.com/everything-i-know-about-germany-
As a German I Must state: this was so much Fun to read!

Thank you!
Antje Boysen (http://Facebook) says:

So true
monika says:
Love it! So true. ..from a german in Oklahoma also known as gerokiman
tandorf says:
Actually, none of these really pertain to any of the many Germans I know.
Sharon says:
Germans can speak English? They are hospitable? You must have lived in a different Germany
than me. Nothing can be more far from the truth!
fritz Walter says:

Auf gehts an saufe
Anne G says:
As the wife of a German (who grew up in Weiden) I found this to be hilarious and accurate. 99
is spot on. Awesome!
Auslander says:
Lived here for three years and most of the things are true and detailed :).. Sorry i get bored on
sundays :(.. I hate it when people speak less .. Unlike spanish or italians they enjoy speaking etc
lols
They not even think of speaking more than hallo ;).. every morning 12 years without
knowing you..
I find Hannover a bit cool as guys out there seem to be normal..
Sorry to say this when i had food in the canteen for abt 2.5 years i was asked by a person do
you like german food ? Haha.. If feel They dont seem to sound wiered n funny and are too
afraid to come out of the shell.. Ah yeah for them speakin in english is a well achieved task ;). I
have never seen so honest people in my life.. They would be so honest that it might sometime
sound foolish :).. U might see a real calmed down and a normal german after few beers ..
Want to have friends go for a round of beer
Rafaela says:
These quotes are ridiculous awesome!!!!! Pure fun :)!!!! Im german, living currently in the US.
I laughed a lot reading about me, many stereotypes are definitely true and described in a
lovely and funny way, thanks to the author :), I really really had a great time reading it
Lydia says:
I am german and I can relate to every point listet in this absolutely wonderful article.
It is such a nice description of our beautiful culture and all the funny and weird things
germans do and let their guests from around the world experience. And surprisingly
Everything listet is true!
Thank you!
Germans should really read the book, espiacially in case of Heimweh.
Anita Leick (https://www.facebook.com/anita.leick) says:

I lived in Germany for 12 years.

I agree with all that was said; however; one thing that was forgotten is that Germans are the
most critical people I have ever come across. Germans tend to criticize other cultures that do
not match up to their mores or values. I prefer, therefore, to reside in the US.
Patricia Sophie Engels (http://thevoguevoyage.blogspot.de) says:

Ohmygosh HAHAH billonest comment. I had to laugh out so hard, that my mum asked me
what had happenedok I had to admit that I am in the bathroom at midnight (german cet
time) HHAHAA GORGEOUS! But Germans also worship bread
Good Night :*
Faceboo says:
I agree!
Caro Remy says:
Hahaha i love it! and the thing with socks and sandals Guy you Are so absolutely right it is
frightening, the older ones always do that:(( greetings from germany
Emilie Callen says:

I think that this list is amazing, I am a German and I can agree with so many points, like the
Jack Wolfskin thing or our German love for Ikea,cars,football. Another thing Germans love
are Barbecue partys, especially with drinking German beer, watching and analyzing football
and discussing which German cars are best.
And in Germany you are seen as too late when you come only 5 minutes before the
appointmen.
Many things are not this way in the big citys, but in the little villages everything of the list is
reality.
jewealsrose says:
I liked reading all the things about germans i recently found out i was german
G Stutzman says:
This is written in such a witty and intelligent way. Sehr gut!
D scholwin (http://Pinterest) says:

Wonderful, funny and touching. Makes me proud of a heritage my father could not have
summed up so clearly and warmly. Thank you ! I feel a deep connection through the simple
understanding of the facts and insights in your lovely article.
Brigitte Starzacher
(https://www.facebook.com/app_scoped_user_id/542055512625523/) says:
I almost fainted. I am staying in Germany for three years now. All of that is so true. Germans
are loving and correct. Well said very well said.
Paula says:
Very funny Im from Mnster, by the way and house shoes are so cozy
Rudi says:
I miss Currywurst in this list. And one more Important thing: Germany are extremely
interested in knowing what the rest of the world thinks about them.
Theresa Toohil says:

A lovely picture of a lovely people, but why did you forget the Weisswurst??
Valium says:
I am proud Munich citizen but I love Berlin, you can be really relaxed and inappropriate with
whatever and no one cares, its the city u visit to let all your frustrations out loudly xD
Eve says:
Hahaaaa, all true!
Lukas says:
Hi Guys, im a German and point 101 is half true. Our dads always told us: open The bottle for
me, and we were excited.
And when there was no opener: table, other bottle, chair, mobile, or your tooth!
And our Cars are The best!
Phil says:
hey liv.
thanks for your list. love it!
although not every point applies to me personally (and some i hope dont apply for the rest of
us) its always nice to hear/ read how we seem to be to an outsider. though i hope noone ever
gave you the feeling to be one.
still laughing about some points, especially the ones that i think of as guilty as charged. but
also the ones that i cannot picture myself in. and when it comes to those- youve never lived in
palatine and i wouldnt wanna be like everyone else around me, so thats excusable.
have a nice day.

surely gonna read more of your stuff.
byebye
D says:
Awesome! All true!

Diese Liste hat den Nagel auf den Kopf getroffen!!!
I will send this to all my family (back home and here in Texas)
Absolutely love it!!!
Michaele says:
Love it. I am from Germany and I am living in Las Vegas now since 13 years. Your points are so
true, make me smile. Good job.
Michaele (Mischa)
Viola says:
Hey
I am definitive German Girl and most of these stereotypes fit on myself. I just Startes crying
geile reading because I had to laugh all the time. Its just so true! Thanks for this very funny
Text. Its just great.
Yours Viola
madchameleon says:
I just laughed so hard about the accuracy of most of this article. Being German myself, I know
many if these things and I am positively guilty of some things as well
Dana says:
I am German and in fact, I have to agree with you for at least 98% of your list. Finally someone
did a good job and described us pretty well. It shows again that there obviously are parts
where we should improve ourselves (the starring, its just annoying) but we definitely like to
talk about things where were doing a good job (our cars are great, but theyre expensive
though). Well done!
Nilson says:
We cannot queue because there is no law (rule) for how to queue. We actually need that!^^
So what drives us most is beeing afraid of loosing time So we always look for fastest way and
run like dogs when we see there is new check out line. Very true
Gio (https://www.LederhosenTalk.com) says:

Haha I just love your first point! Im 1.90m. In the US I was used to be the tallest in the room.
Here in Germany i see 15 year olds, taller than me
Somom says:
I love it. There are many things you captured just right (like germanys dirty little secret :D),
some are not true for where i come from so i can see your point, but the Dner germanified?
Common we invented it! Every other nation just degrades it by changing the original recipe.
Also I do jail walking, cuz its the only way to reach my train in time since Im always too late
(and trust me Deutsche Bahn can smell unpunctuallity and leaves just before you arrive)
Beca Johnston says:

Germans are really something..Strange, if I muss say I lived in Germany 10 years, and I
agree that most of the points here said are true-true- true, but there is only positive points ?,
they are human, reliable and perfectionist, Absoluetely, they are. But they are not just that.
They are also nasty, bullyies with poeple they do not even know I saw at least three times, a
Kid walking by in a mall, taking care of his business and just because their hair or jacket or
anthing is not nice, or branded, they speak inderectly in their conversation with someone
else, very loud so they can be sure, that this kid could hear them and later laugh about him
Being so rude in a subtle way but it is a common thing, I saw it in a bcherei also with
someone elseand this ways an adult and a old woman. being so childish So as it was not
only one event but I was witness many events similar that come to the conclusion that
Germans are rumormonger, gossipmonger, bullies by nature !! but what is worst is Germans
likes to spread negative comments about not just poeple around, and with people they have
around. but with their own family members, they speak just horrible things about their own
relaltives. This is something I noticed more than 10 times, that family relationship are really
challenging here for example: if you want to give a gift to a child of the family, you need to
ask for permission to give and you need to let them know what that will be, otherwise the gift
can be returned or worst that goes directly to the trash. ask permission to buy a gift thats
is weird or not?. But I understand that is all part because they need to have control freaks
over all !!!
Jennifer says:
Love it!!!!!!!! It explains a lot about why I like the foods I do.
Emilia Lopez Monjon

I like Germn but I dont like the weather. I like Sun
Emilia Lopez Monjon

It is a good page
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12/6/2017 What I Know About Germans Liv Hambrett

HOME (HTTP://WWW.LIVHAMBRETT.COM/) LIV (HTTP://WWW.LIVHAMBRETT.COM/ABOUT-2/ABOUT-3/)

GERMANY & THE GERMANS (HTTP://WWW.LIVHAMBRETT.COM/EVERYTHING-I-KNOW-ABOUT-GERMANY-GERMANS/)

EXPLORE NORTHERN GERMANY (HTTP://WWW.LIVHAMBRETT.COM/EXPLORE-NORTHERN-GERMANY/)

LIVING ABROAD (HTTP://WWW.LIVHAMBRETT.COM/TOP-POSTS-ABOUT-MOVING-LIVING-ABROAD/)

My new list, What I Know About North Germans, is here!

1. Germans are tall.

13. Germans worship wurst.

various pig likenesses that can be crafted from marzipan.

26. They are extremely hospitable.

bewildered, at thonged feet and quietly wonder if the wearer is mad.

when its obvious the weather isnt going to turn. Because

33. Germans are always prepared for the rain.

out the front. Because

the benefits of a much more match-fit liver.

a red wine spritzer?

83. Germany loves a public holiday. Bavaria in particular.

89. Germans have bottomless basements.

forcefulness and uncertainty in the face of a system-less world.

and a perfectly clipped shrub.

104. Stefan Raab. He owns Germany.

106. Generally speaking, Germans simply love celebrating.

neighbourly note leaving.

113. Church bells are exempt from all Quiet Times.

118. They like saying juhu!

125. They like drinking yoghurt.

127. Germans make for extremely excitable sports commentators.

Follow (https://twitt Save (http://digg.c

794 thoughts on What I Know About Germans

soy lin says:

Hi Dear Soy Lin

Its true, Berlin breaks all the rules!

Scratch (http://www.pyromusic.de) says:

An old german actor once dropped this rhyme:

Sing along: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S0tmZP87eJ0

Okay, I am going to have to give this a crack.

In Berlin and Hamburg

Like the traffic light at the biggest shopping street:

Jan (http://www.gesthuizen.de) says:

And thats one of the many reasons nobody likes Berlin.

once a Berliner, allways a Berliner

motorradblogger (http://www.thegeek.de) says:

Berlin ist scheie.

Karin Myers (https://www.facebook.com/karin.myers2) says:

Karin Myers (https://www.facebook.com/karin.myers2) says:

To Kat: Yesss! And proud of it.

fjva (http://fjva.wordpress.com) says:

Tom Rheker (http://facebook.com/tom.rheker) says:

Hey KatLou =) (and the others)

True that. Im from rheinland- pfalz.

You are all fulfilling observation no. 105

i also like no. 105

Lance Boyle says:

MOKASSINS! Thats what Australians wear, dont they?

Figanootz (@Figanootz) (http://twitter.com/Figanootz) says:

That is because Berlin is the capital of Turkey

Only the third, after Istanbul and Ankara.

ilopol (http://facebook) says:

Pingback: Reasons I Suspect I am Becoming German A Big Life

Wordsmith Lane (http://wordsmithlane.com) says:

Jrgen Vo (https://www.facebook.com/Iotem) says:

Illnesses?! dont you say, really?!

admin (http://www.oliviahambrett.wordpress.com) says: