Focus

Student #1

Focus Student #1: This student has grown so much in their ability to
express their opinion and use concrete details to justify it. In their answers
from the beginning of the year, they lacked the foundational grammar skills
and the ability to cite reasonable examples to justify their opinion. Now the
student not only writes in complete sentences, but he also spends
adequate time explaining his thoughts to illustrate his argument. He cites a
plethora of details from the time period and uses them to explain how he
believes some had access to the American dream, but some did not. While
his writing has truly grown, he can still work on explaining the details more
to make sure his answer is justified. He has a large list of different
examples and evidence. To strengthen an already strong piece, he can
analyze them more.

Focus Student #2

Focus Student #2: This student, a newcomer from the Dominican
Republic, has shown major progress in her ability to write a structured
formal constructed response question. Prior to this response, she was
given scaffolds to help her create lists of concrete details. Now, at the
end of the year, the student shows major progress on her ability to write
a structured, well-argued response. She cites specific examples,
including the “25% unemployment rate” and the New Deal program. She
cites that there was an increased wealth in the 1920s that was available
to most, but not “Black people that didn’t have a chance to pursue their
dreams.” This shows major growth in her ability to create a complex
response to a question with a lot of depth. For every piece of evidence
she cites, she also gives explanation for how it justifies her answer. This
growth is substantial for her.

Focus Student #3

Focus Student #3: Focus Student #3 has improved substantially since
her first formal constructed response question. Rather than writing
one, long run-on sentence, she now constructs a comprehensive
answer to the prompt. The student takes a firm stance and she cites
clear evidence about new social roles for women and the conditions of
the Gilded Age. The only space for improvement the student needs is
a deeper explanation of how her evidence reinforces her point. When
she started writing in my classroom there was no clear argument or
structure to her responses. Now, the student has a clear
grammatically correct structure and is only lacking a deeper
explanation for her choice of citations. This clearly shows growth in
her writing abilities.