NEW THEORY ABOUT FIRST HUMAN BEING

The Institute of Archaeology for Cognitive

Futurology (IACF) released a communicate in
which a new theory about first human being is
announced.
According to it, the first human, a self-made, not
a hand-made one, as ancient theories are holding,
is Mr. Charles Darwin. The venerable scientist is
credited by the IACF to be the first to have a self-
conscience of his coming into life and, through him,
of our species.
Following the announcement, a reporter from
CarryNopeNews Agency interviewed Mr.Darwin in
his retirement residence from Galapagos Islands.

Reporter: Mr.Darwin, how did you receive the

IAFC communicate?

Mr.Darwiin: The theory is mirroring my scientific

method, bringing the philosophy of science down
from the trees.

Reporter: What do you mean by this, more

specifically?
Mr.Darwin: It brings a down to earth approach,
more in tune with the overall down to earth niveau
of society.

Reporter: Do you think that this theory will force

upon you a new wave of attacks from religious
quarters?

Mr.Darwin: I don’t know. Nevertheless, such

attacks, in case they will be fired at me, can’t
reach me, because my opponents are heavens far
from me... [some of Mr.Darwin’s statements were
edited out of respect to an important group of
CarryNopeNews Agency readers].

Reporter: Mr.Darwin, do you plan to run for the

UN Presidency, as some rumors go from behind the
doors of the organization?

Mr.Darwin: Nonsense. Politics do not fit my theory

of evolution.

Reporter: Should I understand that you are in

favor of a revolutionary overhaul of the governance
throughout the world?

Mr.Darwin: No, no - simply put, politics do not

change. Politics is a rough cornerstone in the world
foundation, and again and again my theory is
dishearteningly stumbling over it.

Reporter: Mr.Darwin, were you upset to the news

that some organization proposed you for the
TIME’s First Monkey of the Millennium?

Mr.Darwin: Not at all. It would position me as

a logical link between all the celebrated people
on the TIME’s cover. I will take it as an indirect
recognition of my evolutionary theory.

Reporter: Mr.Darwin, a last question. What are you

intending to do in the future?

Mr.Darwin: I, and my friends from Science without

Checking Points, want to launch an initiative in the
frame of the Chart for Universal Freedoms, aiming
to give every individual from our species the right to
choose his/her identity as a human or as any other
life form. It will serve not only the ideal of freedom,
but the pledge to bio- and intellectual diversity too.

(a hoax by Cristi V. Andrei)