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 MEN’S HEALTH
DECEMBER 2017

MensHealth.com
@MensHealthMag
@MensHealthMag

FLIP THIS ISSUE FOR YOUR

MH TECH GUIDE
We’ve handled all your holiday
shopping—gear for yourself, gifts
for others, and awesome stuff to
dream about: cars, bikes, cameras,
sneakers, gadgets, and more.
YOUR ONE-STOP SHOP
MensHealth.com/giftguide

STRENGTH HEALTH
DROP 10 POUNDS! SHOULD YOU
Our plan gives you AVOID CT SCANS?
the body you want A surprising answer.
in the time you have. BY MICHAEL EASTER
BY LARA ROSENBAUM 65
46
WEIGHT LOSS
JASON MOMOA CALENDAR
How he got superfit Your 31-day plan.
for Justice League. BY MIKE ZIMMERMAN
BY ANDREW M C MILLEN 70
84
OPIOID CRISIS KIT
What you must know.
ST YLE BY MAIA SZALAVITZ,
CINDY KUZMA, AND
WINTER WEAR
JENNIFER MESSIMER
You’re getting warm.
76
BY DAN MICHEL
49
RELATIONSHIPS
LOOK YOUNGER!
Anti-aging hacks. HOT SEX! INSIDE
BY GRANT STODDARD THE ORGASM LAB
54 Can brain research
improve your sex
life? Yes, yes, yes!
FOOD BY JERILYN COVERT

P. 26
6 MUSCLE MEALS 96
SHAUN WHITE The once (and future?) king of the half-
pipe is now 31 years old. For his next shot at the Olympics, In a hurry? Zap these
he’s trying something new: training! BY JOSH DEAN in the microwave.
BY MATTHEW KADEY , R.D.
57
SLASH YOUR
FEATURES THE EXCHANGE USEFUL STUFF TRAVEL STRESS
DEVILISHLY GOOD
Eggs, 21 tasty ways.
Pack like the pros.
HONORING MAN! HEY, YOU ASKED CLEOPATRA 60
34
Here’s to a great 2018. Survive a polar bear COLEMAN
BY PETER MOORE plunge, deal with The actress gives us MH RESTAURANT
90 regret, master chop- something to stare MUST-READS AWARDS
SUPERHEROES sticks, and get abs at: the screen during Best books of 2017? Chains aren’t all bad!
What if they’re real? without doing planks. her favorite B films. Here are the ones on BY BRITTANY RISHER ON THE COVER
Jason Momoa, photographed
BY CHRIS LEE Plus: Meat sweats? BY TYLER DASWICK our nightstands. AND PAUL KITA by Damian Bennett. Styling by
Steven Constancio, hair and
108 16 32 36 102 makeup by Jennifer Stanfield.

PHOTOGRAPH BY RAMONA ROSALES MensHealth.com / December 2017 5

 Chris Peel
VP/PUBLISHER
Eric Hunter Associate Publisher,
Your guide to Integrated Marketing; Cory Rotkel
the expanding VP/Digital Advertising Director
empire of Men’s ADVERTISING SALES
Health, the New York (212) 697-2040: Leanne
world’s largest LoCastro Senior Fashion & Watch
men’s brand. Director; Doug Zimmerman Senior
Grooming Director; GilTiamsic
Advertising Sales Director;
Jaime Miller Advertising Sales
Manager; Chicago (312) 726-0365:
Autumn Jenks Midwest Sales
Director; Bridget McGuire Midwest
Account Manager; Detroit (248)
930-8091: Stephanie Schultz
Advertising Sales Director;
Los Angeles (310) 615-4567:
Patti Lange Western Ad Director
(310) 252-7528; San Francisco
Office (415) 439-4601: Andrew
Kramer Kramer Media; France
Representative 011 33 1 47 30
71 80: Fabio Lancellotti Def &
Communication; Italy Represen-
tative 011 39 02 874543: Angelo
Careddu Oberon Media S.R.L.

Katherine Louie Publisher’s Assis-

tant; Zoe Fritz, Natalie Kammin,
Kayla Savage, Pilar Silva,
Challen Stadler Sales Assistants

Karen Ferber Business Manager;

Karen Stinner Production
Account Manager; Cindy Wenrich
Production Account Specialist
MARKETING SERVICES
Stephanie Block Associate Inte-
grated Marketing Director; Hilary
Kelley Senior Integrated Marketing
Manager; Jackie Lebowitz, Nicole
Lilienthal, Daria Meoli Pietras
Integrated Marketing Managers;
Jennifer Levin Integrated Market-
ing Coordinator; Delisha Fields
Senior Special Events Manager; Jiri
Seger Creative Director, Marketing;
Robert Slagle Senior Art Director
MENSHEALTH.COM
Eileen Becker Manager, Media
Planning & Strategy; Lexy Ball
Digital Account Strategist; Sarah
Greer Digital Sales Planner

1
Joanne Ferenczi Finance
How This Guy Gave Fear the Finger BE BETTER, TODAY! Director; Lynn Canning VP,
Shaun T’s T is for Group Research Director; Brunetta
The ski jump ramp at Olympic Park in Utah Cathers Research Director
turned MH Adventurist Clint Carter’s courage Transformation is
your game changer.
BOOK
RODALE INTERNATIONAL
to pudding. But if a guy wants to land a double Angela Kim Executive Director,
backflip in five days, going faster and harder
is the only option. Two-time Olympian and ski
CLUB YOUR MASTER PAN! Business Development and Global
Licensing; Tara Swansen Director,
MENSHEALTH.COM/ A Man, A Pan, A Global Marketing; Laura Ongaro
ADVENTURIST jump world champ Ashley Caldwell coached Plan has 100 easy, Editorial Director, Men’s Health
Carter up. We have the video evidence. tasty recipes. & Women’s Health; Samantha
Quisgard Senior Associate Editor;
Natanya van Heerden Interna-

2 3
tional Editorial & Content Analyst

Forge New Muscle Fighting the Opioid Crisis RODALE

Maria Rodale Chairman of the
in 40 Minutes “You can’t save the world, but Board & CEO; Paul McGinley
The Ultimate Upper you can save a world, and that’s EVP, General Counsel & Chief
Body is a training equally important,” says Anthony Administrative Officer; Stephen
Twilliger EVP, Chief Financial
plan that’ll chisel your First. It’s this Tulsa police depart- Officer; Beth Buehler EVP/Chief
chest, broaden your ment paramedic’s job to bring Operating Officer; Adam Campbell
SHOP.MENSHEALTH. MENSHEALTH.COM/ Chief Content Officer; Ronan
back, and make your overdose victims back from the
CODY PICKENS (Carter), PHILIP MONTGOMERY (First), Matt Rainey (workout)

COM NARCAN Gardiner Chief Advertising Officer;

biceps bulge in just brink. Go for a ride with him. Miranda DeSantis SVP, Human
12 weeks. Elite trainer Resources; Bill Strickland Group
Editorial Director; Joyceann Shirer
Ben Bruno keeps SVP, Marketing; Heidi Cho VP,
the routines at 40 Head of Digital; Gail Gonzales
VP/Publisher, Rodale Books
to 50 minutes each.
You do them three J.I. Rodale
Founder, 1942–1971
days a week, with the
option to follow along
digitally or in a note-
ready spiral-bound
book. And he doesn’t
ignore your legs: The
exercises loop in your
quads, hamstrings,
and glutes. All this for
$25, and no toothpick
legs afterward? You’d
be a scrub not to do it.

6 MensHealth.com / December 2017


LETTER FROM THE EDITOR
ON MATT: ARC’TERYX VEILANCE
JACKET, J.CREW SHIRT, ROKA FALCON
TI SUNGLASSES, CANYON BIKE;
ON EDITOR BEN COURT: RAPHA JEANS,
JOHN VARVATOS SHIRT, 3T BIKE
Our feature on page 84, “Rea-
sons to Love Being a Man,” is
a rolling start. Anthony Bour-
dain, Nick Offerman, and a
handful of readers via Facebook
and Twitter weigh in on how to
make the most of the year. And
then there’s our cover guy, Jason
Momoa, a new kind of action
hero. He’s not holed up in his
trailer seducing starlets between
scenes. He’s all output, all gas
pedal, always moving. Momoa’s
getting better at everything,
from shredding on his limited-
edition Les Paul to scaling rock
walls to raising his kids.
Keep On Climbing Hit me up at my handles
below. I’d love to hear why you’re
I’ll never podium, but riding the hills around our psyched about 2018, what you
Pennsylvania offices beats the squat rack for scenery any day. Plus, think it means to be a man today.
the phone stays in the locker—which means you can end up in a pretty Evolve. Improve. Transform.
profound place, both psychologically and geographically. That’s what’s you do. That’s who
Between summits and sprints, endorphin-drunk, we also chase you are. Now prove it to the world.
down headier fare on occasion. Such as: What does it mean to be a man
now? What do we teach our children? How do we define masculinity?
At best, the old stereotypes and archetypes fit like a bad suit; at worst
they’re a straitjacket. They’re holding us back.
I wish these introspective moments were all proactive. But all too Instagram
often this year they were triggered by some guy, somewhere, screwing @mattbean
something up. I bet you’ve struggled to answer for that guy, felt flat-
Twitter
footed at times. We all have to own some of his mess, however little we @mattbean1
feel we’re to blame. But that shouldn’t cause us to ball up and retreat.
Snapchat
Whether we’ve chosen this moment to evolve or not, here we are. Let’s
mbean_10
pull ahead and create change instead of feeling the whiplash of it.
Stream the finals of our inaugural
fitness tournament via Facebook
Live on November 17 at 2 p.m. We’ll Bench Press Rower Broad Jump
have the nation’s top trainers and
fitness influencers battling it out
for top slots and prizes. Think you Round 1: The Gauntlet Start with the 185-pound barbell bench press;
can measure up? Try Round 1 on do as many reps as you can in 1 minute. Then go all-out on the rower
your own; then tune in to see the for 1 minute and track your calories. Finish with two broad jumps; best
finals. facebook.com/MensHealth one counts. Post your results with the hashtag #MHopen.
8 MensHealth.com / December 2017
Matt Bean
EDITOR-IN-CHIEF
Brad Wieners Executive Editor
Mike Schnaidt Creative Director
EDITORIAL
Ben Court Deputy Editor, Cross
Platform Content; Bill Stieg Deputy
Editor; Melissa Jewsbury Manag-
ing Editor; Dean Stattmann Brand
Editor; Joe Kita, Paul Kita Senior
Editors; Ebenezer Samuel Fitness
Editor; John Atwood Story Editor;
Jerilyn Covert Associate Editor;
Tyler Daswick, Brielle Gregory
Assistant Editors; Jackie Frere,
Micaela Young Interns; Gregg
Stebben Contributing Editor;
Shoi Greaves Executive Assistant
ART
Mike Solita Senior Art Director;
Hitomi Sato Art Director;
Raymond Ho Deputy Art Director;
Haley Kluge Designer
PHOTOGRAPHY
Jeanne Graves Director of
Photography; Sally Berman
Deputy Director of Photography;
Sinikiwe Dhliwayo Photo
Production Coordinator; Amy
Wong Contributing Photo Editor
FASHION &
ENTERTAINMENT
Brian Boyé Executive Fashion
Director; Sandra Nygaard
Fashion Director; Dan Michel
Fashion Editor; Danielle Nussbaum
Contributing Editor, Entertainment
COPYEDIT, RESEARCH,
PRODUCTION
Susan West Copy Chief; Mike
Wilson Copy Editor; Jennifer
Messimer Research Chief; Alex
Gardner Researcher; Janna Ojeda
Senior Production Manager; Ana
Zapata Contributing Production
Manager; Jennifer Giandomenico
Digital Production Leader
MENSHEALTH.COM
Sean Evans Digital Director;
EJ Dickson Deputy Editor; Jordyn
Taylor News Editor; Christa
Sgobba Senior Associate Editor;
John Lonsdale Style, Grooming
& Gear Editor; Ashleigh Morley
Branded Content Editor; Mark
Emery Senior Social Media Editor;
Paige Carlotti Social Media Edi-
tor; Alisa Hrustic Assistant Editor;
Danielle Zickl Assistant Editor,
Products; Amanda Becker Web
Designer; Joel Arbaje Multimedia
Photo Creator; Michael Sneeden
Senior Video Producer; Ryan Bird,
Danny O’Halloran Video Pro-
ducers; Pat Almquist, Melora
Armstead, John Dargan,
Pat Pagnano Associate Video
Producers; Kris Lynds Online
Media Producer; Barry Knoblach
Production Manager; James
Nosek, Stefan Zdanowicz Junior
Producers; Monica Andrade,
Ashley Markle Interns
PUBLIC RELATIONS
Jourdann Lubliner Associate
Director, Public Relations
HOW TO REACH US
Customer Care To change your
address, pay your bill, renew a
sub scription, and more, go online
JOEL ARBAJE (Bean and Court), BROWN BIRD DESIGN (illustrations)
to menshealth.com/customer-
service, email HLHcustserv@rodale.
com, call (800) 666-2303, or write
Men’s Health Customer Care, P.O.
Box 3064, Harlan, IA 51593-0128.
Editorial Offices 400 South 10th
Street, Emmaus, PA 18098; Story
Feedback & Questions MHLetters@
rodale.com; Licensing & Reprints
Contact Wyndell Hamilton, Wright’s
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Absolute satisfaction guaranteed.
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them. You may request that your
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or go to rodale.com/privacy-policy.
Printed in USA
 DECEMBER

When you’re whip-

sawed between
warm-and-fuzzy
and make-it-
stop. By Mike
Zimmerman

DRINK ON IT 4 REASONS NOT TO TOTALLY DISMISS. . .

WHAT WOULD
JUMANJI: WELCOME
TO THE JUNGLE
JOSEPH DRINK?
A wise man will
MH PROPOSES: ONE MORE HOLIDAY—DECEMBER 27, NEW SHIT DAY, WHEN GROWN MEN ARE LEFT ALONE TO PLAY WITH THEIR NEW SHIT.

1
bring one of these BRAWN
affordable bottles The “little Hart
picked by Jeffery and a big John-
Lindenmuth of son” combo works.
Whisky Advocate
magazine.
DECEMBER 25

CHRISTMAS, KING

elisekurenbina/Shutterstock (red bow gift), Columbia Tristar/Everett Collection (Williams), Frank Masi/Sony Pictures (Johnson), Kyle Terada/Pool/EPA/REX/Shutterstock (NBA), studiovin/Shutterstock (milk & cookies),
JAMES VERSION
Five NBA games are scheduled

Lucasfilm/Bad Robot/Walt Disney Studios/Kobal/REX/Shutterstock (Daisy Ridley), Christian Petersen/Getty Images (Bono), Anneka/Shutterstock (gifts), Ollyy/Shutterstock (Santa), AF archive/Alamy (3)
TheCrimsonMonkey/Getty Images (wings), Christina Peters/Alamy (beer), Jennifer Barrow/Alamy (smoothie), Sami Sert/Getty Images (energy bars), Jiri Hera/Alamy (jerky), Ian Dagnall/Alamy (Red Bull),
to air on Christmas Day. We’ll

2
BEAUTY
Hey, that’s Neb- watch the one featuring a King and
ula without blue a man named Steph. (Cleveland
makeup, and she’s vs. Golden State, 3 p.m.)

IRISH one charming human.

“It tastes much more IF YOU WERE SANTA. . .
expensive than it is.”
WHAT REFUELING SNACK
3
SLANE IRISH WHISKEY BOREDOM

DO YOU WANT SET OUT?

It gets the kids
$30 out of the house
for a couple of hours.

SCOTCH
A “crowd-pleasing”
single malt.
THE MACALLAN DOUBLE 26% 53%
CASK, 12 YEARS OLD Cookies Wings &
& milk beer
$65

BOURBON
“At 116.8 proof, it’s
unforgettable.”
WILD TURKEY 12% 9%
RARE BREED Energy bar Jerky &

4
BACKSTORY & smoothie Red Bull
$45 Took a while, Men’s Health Twitter poll of 2,465 people

but we’ve finally

made peace with life
after Robin Williams.
TAKE IT OR
LEAVE IT

BINGE IT
DECEMBER 15
IT’S NOT LIKE THEY’RE
We’ll be watching Wormwood, a JUST GIVING IT AWAY.
WE CAN’T FORCE YOU
Netflix documystery by director U2’S NEW ALBUM,
Star Wars: The Last Jedi
Errol Morris spun from initials SONGS OF EXPERIENCE ,
12/15 like CIA and LSD. Whoa. DROPS 12/1.

YOUR 2017 THIS IS NOTHIN’ SANTA, PLEASE SAVE ME

HOLIDAY
STRESS
DASHBOARD Last count, you
have 17 gifts
Boss: “Plan
the office
Sweetie: “I got
you something
Mom: “You’ll be
staying all
Two shopping
days left.
DUDE, YOUR CORTISOL to buy and $43 party this really, really week,” and it’s WTF to get
WARNING LIGHT IS ON. left to spend. year, mmkay?” good.” not a question. sweetie?

10 MensHealth.com / December 2017

 UNFI LTERED

They told me not to look up, meters in about a minute on flat ground, but
Charging and now I get why. I figure I’m nearing the end not on this repurposed ski jump, which mash-
RED BULL of the Red Bull 400. Except I actually have a es elevation (6,857 feet), slippery terrain, and
400 into Thin Air 75-meter bear crawl to go. I’m already gassed steep incline (528-foot gain). It’s a breeding
DATE Lung-bursting, mind-bending and tasting blood in every breath. ground for lactic acid, self-doubt, and smack
SEPTEMBER 30 lessons from a steep sprint. This is how the world’s hardest quarter mile talk. About 800 people enter, and the finish is
BY EBENEZER SAMUEL messes with your mind. You can cover 400 a mess of exhausted bodies and weak smiles.
LOCATION
PARK CITY,UTAH

PHOTOGRAPHS BY
ETHAN SCOTT
 UNFILTERED

2 4

1. Aimee Flint, PR professional
“Stay steady. There were people
flying past me at the start, but my
plan of attack was to go past them
at the top. Maintain your rhythm.”
2. Stephen Bigelow, musician
“You wind up partway up that hill,
and you’re putting forth what feels
like all you can. You need to tell
yourself, ‘I can put out more.’ ”
3. Mike Brienzo, golf attendant
“At one point someone’s taking
a picture of me. I catch a glimpse,
and she asks if I’m having fun.
I’m thinking, ‘If only you knew!’ ”
4. Ebenezer Samuel, MH editor
“Midway through, everything’s
against me—slippery turf, thin air.
The only reason to keep going
up? It’s easier than walking down.”

14 MensHealth.com / December 2017


5. Ryan Lochte, U.S. swimmer
“I hit 175 meters and then started
crawling. I wish I didn’t look up.
I was like, ‘Crap. There’s so much
more, and this is gonna kill me.’”
6 7
6. Charles Robinson, trainer
“I felt the elevation effects and
fatigue 150 meters up. But I kept
telling myself, ‘This is just another
obstacle you will overcome.’ ”
THE LEADERBOARD
FIRST PLACE
Jared Shumate
4:25
7. Melissa Maberry, trainer
“ ’It’s just 400 meters’ is a dirty
lie. You’re pushing your hard-
est. To be out of energy in just
a quarter mile is shocking.”
Ryan Lochte 8:08, 170th
Ebenezer Samuel 12:31, 454th
Ted Zuniga 1:04:12, 609th
8. Jorge Prieto, store clerk
“At the end of the race, it was bad—
the lack of oxygen, and my legs
were burning. But finally, there’s
satisfaction. It’s like, ‘Wow, I did it.’”
 THE DECEMBER

Your biggest,
strangest,
and most
embarrassing
questions—
answered!

AM I DYING?
After lifting, I
get these bumps
under my skin
near my collar-
bone. They don’t
hurt and they go
away, but I’m still
freaked out.
Stan, Hershey, PA
They say guys with
big nodules must
have big lift sessions.
Those are “weight-
lifter’s nodules,”
a.k.a. subcutaneous
nodules. Our guess:
You were doing front
squats, right? Weight
on the clavicle can
cause inflammation
because there’s little
padding between
collarbone and skin,
says Mike Reinold, P.T.,
C.S.C.S. Pad the bar or
wear a padded com-
pression shirt. When
doing front squats,
try to place the bar on
your deltoids, close to
your throat. A trainer
can help. If the bumps
persist, see a doctor.

TECH
Why did my car
battery die with
no warning?
Wendell, Bangor, ME
Failure to crank in
December suggests
I SIGNED UP FOR ONE OF THOSE CHARITY it was fading in July.
But in colder temps,
POLAR BEAR PLUNGES. NOW WHAT? your battery loses
capacity and the
Mark, Madison, WI
engine needs more
force to turn over,
Shrinkage, that’s what. We found you some polar brrr advice from says Joe Wiesenfelder,
Scott Carney, an environmental conditioning expert and the author executive editor at
of What Doesn’t Kill Us. Prepare at home with showers that end with 30 seconds Cars.com. You can
extend its life by
of cold water. At the site, shed your layers well beforehand to let your skin cool down. keeping the radio and
Then don’t hesitate, and once you’re submerged, try to relax. “Your inclination headlights off when
the engine’s off. Until
will be to clench up,” Carney says, “but after about 30 seconds the pain should give carmakers come up
way to a pleasant endorphin rush.” Afterward, warm yourself gradually, with maybe with a specific dash-
a few pushups to kickstart your body heat. And consider keeping up with those board warning, test it
with a gadget like the
daily cold showers. Research suggests they may help ease depression, and devotees Motopower MP0514A
claim to have improved circulation and less stress. Plus they build character. ($16, amazon.com).

16 MensHealth.com / December 2017 ILLUSTRATIONS BY RAFA ALVAREZ

TEXT THE TRAINER WHAT’S THE DIFF?
FOOD COURT

Blender and The Cheesecake Factory’s

food processor. Godiva Chocolate Cheesecake
Q: Yo, coach. When I lift Milan, Montpelier, VT THE CRIME 1,250 calories
weights, my tracker A blender’s four THE PUNISHMENT 2 hours and 26 minutes
shows that my heart rate tight blades spin of shoveling snow to cancel that out. But
stays freakishly low. faster than the two why risk frostbite? Just split it four ways.
What’s that mean? larger ones in a food
NUTRITION processor. James

A: Not unusual. Heart rates

during lifting tend to be
lower than during aerobic
exercise like running.
Q: Oh. Why?
A: Your body’s oxygen
demand is much lower for
lifting. Yes, your heart will
pump harder, but it doesn’t
have to increase its beat
rate as much as it would if
you were running.
Q: Cool. So I have
nothing to worry about?
Should I even use a tracker
when I’m lifting?
A: No worries. And nah,
I don’t recommend track-
ers for strength training,
because they tend to
underestimate energy
expenditure. You’ll just
psych yourself out.
Bill Hartman, P.T., C.S.C.S.,
is the founder of Indianapolis
Fitness and Sports Training.
I’m very jittery
and think I might
need to nix the
caffeine. What’s
the best way to go
about doing that?
Seth, Baltimore, MD
Well, you could do
the obvious, Shaky,
and drink a little less
coffee every few
days. Cut back by
about half a mug
(that’s 50 milligrams
or so of caffeine) until
you feel comfortable,
suggests Wesley
Delbridge, R.D., of the
Academy of Nutrition
and Dietetics. (Try
half-caf, or swap in
tea.) MH nutrition
advisor Alan Aragon,
M.S., says he’s seen
people pull it off with
a four-week modified
cold-turkey plan.
The first week, you’ll
have no caffeine
for a single day. The
next week, you go
caffeine-free for three
days. The third week,
abstain for five days.
Then, for the fourth
week, no caffeine at
all. That fifth week?
Sweet dreams.
Briscione, director
of culinary research
energy from your FATHERHOOD
body; this “thermic
at the Institute of effect” raises basal
Culinary Education, metabolism, and I’ve seen the
recommends the meat stokes that stories of sexual
blender for making furnace. “This, com- assault on cam-
silky-smooth foods, bined with the high pus. What should I
like peanut butter, salt content in some be telling my son,
who’s a freshman?
soup, or (duh) post- meats, can lead to
workout smoothies. excessive sweating,” Joe, San Antonio, TX
For texture, like in says Luiza Petre, M.D., Save one of those
salsa or hummus, a cardiologist and stories and use it to
use the processor, he integrative health start the conversa-
says. We like the Vita- and wellness physi- tion. That’s the advice
mix A2500 Ascent cian. Plus, digesting of Kate Rohdenburg,
Series blender ($520, a high-protein meal who runs programs
vitamix.com). triggers a flood of that educate young
stress hormones like people about sexual
violence prevention.
HEALTH cortisol and adrena-
This is important
line, which also ramps
up metabolism, Dr. stuff, from showing
What the heck Petre says. You can respect for partners
are meat sweats, limit the effect by to avoiding risky situ-
and are they real? eating less protein in ations. Then get real:
Danny, Trenton, NJ one sitting. To coun- Walk through a typical
Yep. Basically you’re teract the odor, turn to night-out situation.
sharing the rib eye chlorophyll-rich foods You want him to be
with your skin. As his own man and not
like kale, chard, col-
soon as two hours go along with bad
lards, and spinach.
after a high-protein behavior sometimes
meal, you sweat more seen in groups. As for
than usual as your a woman’s consent,
body processes the give him this simple,
byproducts of pro- direct script from
tein breakdown. This psychologist Carl
provides a feasting Pickhardt, Ph.D.: “Is this
environment for skin something you really
bacteria—i.e., a stink want to do?” Also: That
incubator. Digesting consent can be with-
meat requires extra drawn at any time.

RELATIONSHIPS
I love my wife, but when she’s talking, I tune out for long stretches. Why?
Blaine, Fayetteville, NC
Because her sister’s new backsplash isn’t scintillating? Staying tuned in takes a lot of mental energy,
says Matt Lundquist, L.C.S.W., of Tribeca Therapy. If you’re tired, you might not have that energy to
spare. But there are tricks. Unwind after work, walk the dog, and then sit down ready to listen. Focus
on exhaling to keep your thoughts from wandering. Use “reflective listening”: Play back some or all of
what she says in your own words to stay grounded. That said, zoning out may mean you’re uncom-
fortable with intimacy, Lundquist says. She can help: Have her call it out when you’re disconnecting.

MH If you’ve zoned 35% DELAY: “It all depends...”

TWITTER out and she asks
POLL your opinion, 45% HONESTY: “Sorry, I spaced.”
what’s your play?
Based on responses from 834
female followers of Men’s Health 4% DISTRACTION: “Look at this tweet.”

16% JIU-JITSU: “I think you know.”

MensHealth.com / December 2017 17

 THE EXCHANGE

BELLY OFF! CLUB BODY SCIENCE cisco. Certain nerve mouth to a region
cells detect things like of your brain called
temperature and pain, the somatosensory
FATHER + SON = 154 POUNDS GONE! Why does mint
gum make water
he says, and when
specialized proteins
cortex. So lukewarm
water might feel cool.
seem colder? on these cells sense a In a similar way, the
Jim, Bend, OR change, they transmit capsaicin in peppers
It’s a drug messing
an electrical signal feels hot. Nature’s
with your brain, Jim.
from, in this case, your tricky that way.
The drug in question
here is menthol, an
organic compound ACTUALLY DELICIOUS
that’s quite the mimic. Parmesan + Whiskey
In your nerve cells,
menthol triggers the No, do not shave the cheese into the
same reaction that drink. Serve them together. Scientists
cold does, explains have found that the two share similar
David Julius, Ph.D., a flavor compounds. Nibble a bit of Parm.
professor of physiol- Then sip the whiskey. Repeat. See?
ogy at UC San Fran-

FITNESS

DEAN AND DALTON D E ROSA

DALTON, 18 DEAN, 48
BETHLEHEM, PA W. HARRISON, IN
HEIGHT 5'11" HEIGHT 6'1"
BEFORE 245 lb BEFORE 314 lb
AFTER 175 lb AFTER 230 lb
TIME 6 months TIME 8 months

THE SETBACK
DEAN: We used to bond over junk food. DALTON: Oh, we
bonded! DEAN: I was always tired and sore. DALTON: Same.
I had no energy. I ate carbs, fat, and sugar, and did hardly
any exercise. I didn’t like the way I looked. DEAN: Girls?
DALTON: No! I was just tired of people saying stuff about
my weight. Besides, I couldn’t let my old man show me up.

THE LIFESTYLE
DALTON: Every time I look at a plate, I’m doing math in my
head. DEAN: I can ballpark it now. DALTON: It’s mostly about
protein: eggs, peanut butter, Greek yogurt, steak. Salad.
Now that I work out, I can have bigger portions. DEAN: I don’t
eat potatoes, bread, or pasta. I’ll snack on dark chocolate.

THE FITNESS FOREARM EXERCISES:

DEAN: I go to the gym five or six days a week. DALTON: With
his gloves. DEAN: I don’t want calluses! I do 45 minutes of free
weights and 25 of cardio. DALTON: I’ll lift for an hour and run
a mile or two. It makes me feel like I accomplished something.
DEAN: He’s right. If I skip the gym I feel crappy. I might do
a kickboxing class next. DALTON: Oh, you get gloves for that!
THE SUPP ORT
DEAN: We bond over healthy food now. And tease each other.
DALTON: You said my shirts are tight. I like them to fit. DEAN:
NECESSARY OR NOT ?
Mack, Boca Raton, FL
Do ’em. We once had a female editor who swore that
women loved strong forearms. (So we rolled up our
sleeves and went to work.) “Forearms are forgotten
in the Instagram age,” says Craig Ballantyne, creator
of Turbulence Training. “Men don’t respect forearm
STEVE BOYLE (DeRosas after)

Like a sausage casing. DALTON: You’re jealous. I look good!

DEAN: You do. But seriously, I’m proud of Dalton. DALTON: I’m
proud of you too, Dad. DEAN: He won’t let me show him up.
And I try to compete with an 18-year-old. Stupid—but I try.
BELLY OFF! CLUB Tell us your weight loss story
at transformation@rodale.com.
training like Arnold and his crew did.” Do these after a
back workout: heavy barbell hold (hold the bottom of a
shrug position for 30 seconds), hammer curl (8 reps per
side with a 3-second lowering phase), and reverse curl
(10 reps). To hone your grip technique, see page 44.

18 MensHealth.com / December 2017

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 THE EXCHANGE

TECHNOLOGY

ST YLE
ASK THE
ADVISORS
Where I live, it
rarely gets cold
enough for a
heavy winter coat.
And the layered
look feels bulky.
Got an alternative?
Tyler, Flagstaff, AZ
Well, you could go
full Bannon and Is it possible to have a sexually
layer multiple shirts, transmitted infection and
peeling as the not have any symptoms? I can’t
weather or photo
stop worrying.
op or tweetstorm
Bob, Silver Spring, MD
dictates. But here’s a
better idea from the
Yes. And the only surefire way
MH style team: an to know—and to stop worrying—
is to get yourself tested. Most
outdoorsy hybrid shirt
jacket—also known ARE THOSE PROMO CODE people who get chlamydia, HPV,
and HIV don’t notice any symp-
as a jac shirt or (our
favorite) “shacket.” PLUG-INS SAFE? Richard, Philadelphia, PA toms initially. (Gonorrhea, on the
More than a shirt, less Web paranoia: a holiday classic. You’re smart to be cautious. A reputable other hand, is more likely to show
than a jacket, these site like the Chrome Web Store (chrome.google.com/webstore) is a safe symptoms, especially in men.) So
tweed, flannel, or start, says Cisco security outreach manager Craig Williams. Internet how often should you be tested?
wool tops have been security consultant Steve Weisman says Honey (joinhoney.com) is safe Once a year or more, depending
a longtime mainstay and it works. A few warnings: Actually read the user agreement, and if a on the number of partners you’ve
of classic brands like had and what you need for your
plug-in’s questions feel nosy, move on. Also, set aside a plug-in-free browser
L.L.Bean, Filson, and peace of mind. Some people get
for banking, Williams says; otherwise you risk targeted ads or malware.
Eddie Bauer. But now tested after a relationship ends so
we’re seeing updated Or just ignore promo codes and look for deals on a site like Ebates that
will give you cash back from retailers without living inside your browser. they’re prepared to talk with new
solid versions from partners about their STI status.
J.Crew, Taylor Stitch,
Others get tested with a new part-
and Faherty. “Plaid
ner before they start having sex,
can read lumberjack,
or at least suggest
NUTRITION drop food, spear
meat, or gesture with
or at least before they stop using
that you rake your chopsticks. And stick- condoms. Be honest with your
own leaves,” says MH I’m a complete ing them point-down doctor and then decide how often
executive fashion chopsticks klutz. into your rice bowl you should get STI testing.
director Brian Boyé. What’s the trick? symbolizes death,
A solid like charcoal, Mikey, Dallas, TX says Edward Wang, MH ADVISORY BOARD
navy, or olive drab is Move to fork-free author of Chopsticks:
Brain Health P. Murali Doraiswamy, M.D.; David
versatile and will be rural China and A Cultural and Culi- Liebeskind, M.D. Cardiology John Elefteriades, M.D.;
appropriate in almost amuse the locals. Two nary History. Do feel Prediman Krishan Shah, M.D.; Eric Topol, M.D. Dentistry
Mark S. Wolff, D.D.S., Ph.D. Dermatology Adnan Nasir,
any professional set- years, max—you’ll free to hold a bowl M.D., Ph.D. Emergency Medicine Travis Stork, M.D.
ting. Try pairing it with be great. Or you can thumb and atop your to your lower lip and Endocrinology Sandeep Dhindsa, M.D. Exercise
a cotton button-front practice with these ring finger. Hold the push rice into your Science Alexander Koch, Ph.D., C.S.C.S.; Mark Peterson,
Ph.D., C.S.C.S.*D Family Medicine Ted Epperly, M.D.
shirt, a Henley, or a instructions: Rest the top stick between mouth in a circular Gastroenterology Mark Welton, M.D. Mental Health
lightweight sweater. bottom chopstick your thumb and index motion. To get really
KYLE HILTON (Herbenick portrait illustration)

Thomas Joiner, Ph.D.; William Pollack, Ph.D. Nutrition

(Just not all at once.) in the crease of your finger like a pencil, good, try this training Alan Aragon, M.S.; Jeffrey Blumberg, Ph.D., F.A.C.N., F.A.S.N.,
C.N.S.; Mike Roussell, Ph.D. Ophthalmology Kimberly
but two-thirds of game from chop- Cockerham, M.D., F.A.C.S. Otolaryngology Jeremiah Alt,
the way up from the sticks maker John M.D., Ph.D., F.A.C.S. Pain Medicine Paul Christo, M.D., M.B.A.
Sex & Relationships Debby Herbenick, Ph.D., M.P.H.
HOW-TO HAIKU point. (Higher is the Economaki: Spread Sleep W. Christopher Winter, M.D. Sports Medicine
Some Assembly Requirements sign of a master; lower uncooked rice on the Bill Hartman, P.T., C.S.C.S.; Nicholas DiNubile, M.D.; Jordan
Metzl, M.D. Training Mike Boyle, M.Ed., A.T.C.; Ben Bruno;
down is the sign of a table. Whoever puts
Alwyn Cosgrove, C.S.C.S.*D; BJ Gaddour, C.S.C.S.; David
Parts are all spread out beginner.) Pinch your the most grains in a Jack; Urology Elizabeth Kaveler, M.D.; Larry Lipshultz,
Urge to wing it is subdued food by moving only bowl in 15 seconds M.D.; Judd Moul, M.D., F.A.C.S. Weight Loss David Katz, M.D.,
Directions: followed the top stick. A few wins. “It’s hilarious,” M.P.H., FACPM, F.A.C.P.; Jeff Volek, Ph.D., R.D.

etiquette tips: Don’t he promises.

20 MensHealth.com / December 2017

 PREPARED FOR A
LONGER RETIREMENT?
THE EXPERIMENT THAT
GOT COUPLES TALKING.

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money we’ll need in retirement. The bigger concern? Most of us aren’t talking about it.

So we invited couples to guess how much money they’ll need in retirement using our
interactive walkway. It turned out that most couples weren’t on the same page and fell
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 THE EXCHANGE

SNAPSHOT ANSWER

FIND ME A NON-GOOFY
HOLIDAY OUTFIT. Martin, Lansing, MI

NUTRITION
I refuse to laugh
at “What am I,
chopped liver?”
until I know what it
is, and why that’s
supposedly funny.
Cause it’s not. FITNESS
Ken, Reno, NV
Tough crowd. The Planks bore me, and I hate
humor may be lost crunches. But dammit, I want
in the Catskills mists, abs. Give me some options.
but “it” is a protein- Bradley, Baton Rouge, LA
rich side dish, often Stop doing just two exercises.
unloved and easily These three moves from Anarchy
overlooked. Liver can Abs creator Andy Speer, C.S.C.S.,
be an acquired taste, hit your core from all sides; do 3 to
but chopped liver is
4 rounds of 12 to 15 reps.
great stuff. It’s made
with cooked beef 1. Hollow body pullover. With
liver and/or chicken your lower back flat on the floor,
liver, cooked onions, lift your legs off the floor. Hold a
and hard-boiled 10-pound dumbbell above your
eggs, along with head; then lower it behind your
salt and pepper and head to 2 to 3 inches above the
run through a food floor. Pull it back over your hips.
processor. Because 2. Weighted side plank pulse.
it’s made from organ In a side plank position on your
Abercrombie & Fitch sweater, Dockers pants, Nisolo shoes,
meat, it’s nutritious: Hestra gloves, Autodromo watch, Nobis hat elbow, hold a dumbbell on your
According to Beth upper hip. Drop your hips to the
Warren, R.D.N., C.D.N.,
floor and then lift them back
author of Living a Real
up, but focus on squeezing the
Life with Real Food, it’s
rich in iron and vita- AM I NORMAL? term for this: “coun-
terfactual thinking.”
sharply, but they tend
to get over it and
oblique at the top of the lift.
mins, including D, K 2, Neal Roese, Ph.D., a move on fairly quickly. 3. Single-arm bent-over reverse
A, and B12. Nutrition- Why do I still psychologist with Pro tip from Roese: “If fly. Holding a dumbbell, hinge
ally speaking, that ain’t wince when I think the Kellogg School you can respond to at your waist so your torso is
chopped liver. Spread of stupid things I of Management at regret with action— parallel with the floor. With a
this creamy treat on did 20 years ago? Northwestern Uni- by, say, apologizing, neutral neck, raise the dumb-
crackers or challah Vaughn, Omaha, NE versity, says these meeting new people, bell straight out to the side.
bread—it’s a popular That reaction is per- cringeworthy mem- or trying a new class Brace your abs and pause at the
Jewish mainstay on fectly appropriate, ories occupy about or hobby—you can top. Repeat with the other arm.
the Sabbath and hol- depending on how 2 percent of our move quickly past it.”
idays. If your Bubbe big of a dumbass you daily thoughts. While (By the way, relax; we MH TWITTER POLL
doesn’t make it, buy it were. Obsessing, being present and checked with Deb-
at a Jewish deli. maybe not. There’s a mindful is all the rage bie from your chem Describe your abs on the
these days, Roese class. She thought it Christian Bale scale:
says counterfactual was cute, not stupid.
FACT-CHECK MOM thinking—those “if But she didn’t like you 41% American Hustle
Is it possible to be overtired? only” musings—can that way anyway.) BEER GUT
be healthy. “Regret
Yes, sleepyhead. It’s mostly a childhood points to a fixable 43% The Big Short
thing, this exhausted resistance to problem,” he says. REGULAR
sleep. But it can happen in adults, says You might gain some
MITCH MANDEL (clothing)

Michael J. Breus, Ph.D., a psychologist insight and do better 11% Bruce Wayne
and advisor to SleepScore Labs. To next time. Overdoing RIPPED
recover, don’t sleep before your regular the ruing, however,
bedtime, he says. “That can throw you can be ruinous. Men- 5% Batman armor
off even more in the days that follow.” tally healthy people CHISELED
experience regret

22 MensHealth.com / December 2017

 ®
With its available Entune™ 3.0 Premium Audio with JBL w/ Clari-Fi, you’ve got a front row seat.
Prototype shown with options. Production model may vary. 2018 Camry available Fall 2017. ©2017 Toyota Motor Sales, U.S.A., Inc.
 THE BASICS
Do the Perfect Pullup
A COMPLETE PROGRAM FOR MASTERING THE CLASSIC EXERCISE THAT STRENGTHENS YOUR BACK, ARMS, AND SHOULDERS.
MOBILITY
Complete 2 rounds of this circuit.
The standing wall slide fires up your
upper back, while the reverse plank
hits your glutes, abs, and lower back.
Rest 15 seconds between moves.
Standing Wall Slide
Stand with your upper back against a wall. Raise
both arms overhead (hands beyond shoulder
width). Press them against the wall. This is the
starting position. Lower your upper arms until
your elbows are below shoulder height. Return
to the starting position. That’s 1 rep; do 10.
Reverse Plank
Sit on the floor with your legs extended and
feet together. Put your hands under your shoul-
ders, fingers pointing backward. Keeping your
arms straight, tighten your glutes and raise
your hips so your body is straight from ankles
to shoulders. Hold for 30 seconds.
BENCHMARK HOW MANY ROUNDS DID YOU
SCORECARD SURVIVE IN 10 MINUTES?
24 MensHealth.com / December 2017
STRENGTH
To build up your back and biceps
strength, perform these two moves
either as part of this workout or
in your normal routine. Rest for
90 seconds between sets.
Lat Pulldown
Sit at a lat pulldown station, pick a moderate
weight, and grasp the bar using an overhand
grip. Without moving your torso, pull the bar
to your chest, squeezing your shoulder blades
together. Hold for 1 second; then slowly return
the bar to the start. Do 3 sets of 10 to 12 reps.
Alternating Dumbbell Row
Stand holding 25-pound dumbbells. Fold at
your hips and lower your torso until it’s nearly
parallel to the floor, the dumbbells hanging at
arm’s length. Pull the right dumbbell straight
up to the side of your torso, lower it, and repeat
with the left. That’s 1 rep; do 3 sets of 10 to 12.
5 or less 6 or 7
A fine start Damn good
YOUR TRAINER
Gerren Liles,
N.A.S.M., Master
Instructor, Proj-
ect by Equinox, NYC
@gerrenliles
THE BENCHMARK
Set a timer for 10 minutes. Do 1
pullup and 10 burpees; that’s round
1. Each round, add a pullup and sub-
tract a burpee as you strive toward
the 1oth round—10 pullups, 1 burpee.
Pullup
Hang from a bar using an overhand grip, your
arms slightly beyond shoulder width. Pull your
chest to the bar, pause, and squeeze your shoul-
der blades. Slowly lower your body back to
a hang. Can’t keep going? Release the bar and
stretch for a moment; then jump and continue.
Burpee
Stand with your feet slightly beyond shoulder-
width apart. Squat, place your hands on the
floor, and kick your legs back wide into a pushup
position. Do a pushup, and as you raise your
torso, jump your feet back between your hands
and stand up. That’s 1 burpee.
8 or more Post your score:
That’s MH fit! #MHBenchmark
I L LU S T R AT I O N S BY + I S M
© Copyright 2017 American Pistachio Growers

AmericanPistachios.org
SHAUN WHITE
T he Manual

U S E F U L S T U F F
Snowboarder
extraordinaire FOR
Enligh tened
Born September Liv ing
3, 1986
Nickname:
Flying Tomato
Signature move:
Double McTwist
1260
Shaun White’s Shaun White flew home from the 2014 Winter Olym-
pics in Sochi having finished fourth in the snowboarding half pipe.
Double gold
medalist Olympic Drive He’d won that event at the two previous Olympics and become a global
superstar. He was 27, and for the first time, he decided to take a break
SECTION EDITED HE NEVER TOOK THE GYM SERIOUSLY
BY PAUL KITA BEFORE. NOW HIS WORKOUTS STOKE from competitive snowboarding. “Finally the whirlwind stopped,”
HIS DETERMINATION. / BY JOSH DEAN he says, “and I could look at my life and say, ‘What do I want to do?’”

26 MensHealth.com / December 2017 PHOTOGRAPH BY RAMONA ROSALES

 THE ALLEY OOP DECEMBER
FEEL THE CONNECTION

We start with a recommendation. That spawns the next one,

which spawns the next...keep turning pages. You’ll see.

blunting that edge. White will be 31 years old

He started a men’s clothing line (WHT
Space), played with his band (Bad Things),
and expanded his portfolio by launching a
music and sports festival in L.A. and buying
a stake in a California ski resort company.
But apparently he also didn’t want to end his
BROWN BIRD DESIGN (illustrations), ANTHONY
CALVERT (Alley Oop illustrations throughout)
when the 2018 Games begin on February 9 in
SOAR MORE
White’s secret to flying
PyeongChang, South Korea. Winning gold
high: a trio of leg-building
again isn’t certain. moves from his trainer,
It was Björn Borg who injected a jolt of Tim Hartwig. Use them
gravitas into White’s training mentality. to elevate your workout.
One afternoon, White caught a documen-
tary about Borg and John McEnroe, and he
was struck by how seriously the Swede took
his training. “It dawned on me that Borg had
a team of people supporting him,” White
recalls. “I thought, ‘If I’m really going to
make a run at the next Olympics, I should
invest in myself.’”
So he committed. He hired Esther Lee, a
physical therapist who’d worked for tennis
legend Serena Williams for years. Lee spot- Band Walks
ted weaknesses in White immediately—like Wrap a medium-strength band just
a shorter stride on his left foot and a mis- above your knees. Stand with your
knees slightly bent. Step left with
aligned back. Lee also found Tim Hartwig, your left foot; return. Now go right.
C.S.C.S., a Beverly Hills trainer who’d worked That’s 1 rep; do 2 sets of 15.
with many pro athletes and Olympians.
White had never really trained. He would
work out “and then not work out for a while,”
he says. (Sound familiar?) To fight this ten-
dency, Hartwig imposed a strict schedule.
The two trained three or four days a week
either at White’s home gym or a private facil-
ity in Southern California. They focused on
leg and core strength and especially joint
mobility and range of motion. Once or twice
a week, they worked on building endurance
by mountain biking. “It really changed things
for me,” White says.
Dumbbell Seated Box Jump
The winter before he made the decision to Hold a light kettlebell at your chest.
overhaul his training, White would do only Sit on a bench, with a box in front of
two consecutive days of hard-core snow- you. Rock backward slightly; then,
in one motion, stand and jump onto
boarding before taking a rest day. “Now I ride the box. That’s 1 rep; do 3 sets of 3.
twice a day, four or five days in a row, and I’m
not tired,” he says. He has more energy and
sleeps better. He’s both stronger and more
explosive. At the Burton U.S. Open in Vail,
Colorado, in 2016, he soared 26 feet into
the air over the pipe, breaking his personal
height record by 2 feet.
Hartwig says, in fact, that White is “by far

Olympic career in fourth place.
White was always fit from his self-guided,
year-round regimen of snowboarding in win-
ter and skating and surfing in summer, but he
never followed a specific regimen for fitness.
“In snowboarding, it was pretty uncool to
work out,” he says. His natural talent enabled
him to spin faster and fly higher, but age is
the best athlete I’ve ever worked with. He’s
naturally gifted, and it wasn’t until he started
aging that he realized he needed to step it up.
Not many athletes realize that.”
Some skeptics might wonder why it took
White so long. “People ask me, ‘You’re really
going to the Olympics again?’ I’m like, ‘Dude,
I feel better than I ever have.’”
One-Leg Bulgarian Split Squat
Holding a light dumbbell at your left
shoulder, stand with your left foot
on a bench behind you. Lower until
your right knee bends 90 degrees.
Stand. That’s 1 rep; do 3 sets of 15.

MensHealth.com / December 2017 27

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28 MensHealth.com / December 2017 PHOTOGRAPH BY TRAVIS RATHBONE

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 USEFUL STUFF
J I M M Y
STRAIGHT-UP ADVICE ON WOMEN, WORK, AND THINGS THAT DRIVE MEN CRAZY.
Jimmy, at what
point does age
difference become
gross? RANDY, BOZEMAN, MT
As a barkeep, I’ve staked money on the
“daughter or girlfriend” bet. And I always
win. One easy way to tell is by the way she
steers his wheelchair. But here’s what I see:
The max should be about 25 years between
the two. That’s about a generation. So she
can be 24 and you can be 49 and it’s weird,
but not gross. Gross is her at 25 and you
collecting Social Security checks. In other
words: about a generation and a half.
His favorite pickup
line: “My teeth and I
no longer sleep together,
but you and I could.”
30 MensHealth.com / December 2017
STEP 2: HAVE A COW
Grant Mombach, marketing manager at
Tunity, likes Public House at the Luxor
in Vegas for good grub and sports.
T H E B A R T E N D E R
How the hell am I going to
survive the holidays this year
without talking politics?
Jeff, Dix Hills, NY
This one’s easy: You don’t talk.
You nod. You stick a bottle of that
Christmas ale between your lips.
You chew your figgy pudding.
You change the subject. I’ve wit-
nessed spats at my bar going back
to Reagan and Carter and have
never, not once, seen someone’s
mind changed by a mouth that
belongs to someone else. So how
about those Giants, eh?
A guy at work keeps pawning
his projects off on me. He’s not
my boss. Should I tell my boss?
Dylan, Savannah, GA
Let’s say you ask me for a whiskey
sour. I’m busy so I give the order
to Lenny, but Lenny makes you
a Rusty Nail. Do you complain to
me? No, you tell Lenny he screwed
up. Now if Lenny gives you guff
about it, that’s when you come to
me. I’ll sort it out with Len.
I bought a truck. How come
suddenly every friend I have
needs to haul something?
Kelly, Cedar Rapids, IA
JIMMY
Why is it that after I shell out
$130 on concert tickets for a
date, she also wants overpriced CALLS
Like you didn’t know this was
coming. When my pal Al got a
shuffleboard table, I shuffled on
food and drinks at the show? BS ON it. When Monty put in a pool, I
backstroked in it. And after Nicky
KYLE HILTON (Jimmy illustration), Pulp Photography/Getty Images (couple), MATT CARLSON (drinks illustration)
Hugh, Selma, AL
Well, because it’s a date, Hugh.
Because your date figures if you’ve
brought home one of those ultra
high-def TVs, his wife had to kick
got the scratch for pricey tickets,
you can also afford the craft
beer. Look, if she offers to pay for
PLATES
THAT
me out of his house every night.
This is what adults call “sharing.”
Which reminds me, can you take
snacks, that’s great. But if she
doesn’t, that’s not something you
AREN’T my old fridge to the dump?
should blame her for. You asked PLATES Guys who don’t wash their
her along, didn’t you? Maybe if Slate is hands after using the bath-
you worry about her instead of for walking room: What is that?
what she’s costing you, she’ll on. Plates Jose, Dover, NJ
return the favor and ask you out are for In my line of work, that’s an easy
on a date sometime. Then you can eating off. shortcut to getting yourself ass-
go ahead and order the 18-ounce Enough canned. For everyone else, it’s
Delmonico with a nice Bordeaux. already. called just being an ass in the can.
COCKTAIL CHATTER
What’s the secret to great small talk at parties?
Go to extremes. Did that guy mention he worked in con-
struction? Ask him about his most dangerous experience on
the job. Is their kid a new driver? Ask, “When were you most
afraid?” Worst dates. Best dates. Most embarrassing stories.
You just have to ask. —Brendan Francis Newnam and Rico
Gagliano, authors of Brunch Is Hell, out December 5
 USEFUL STUFF STEP 3: HIT THIS BAR
Public House executive chef Scott
Conti says Clif Bar’s Nuts & Seeds
keeps him going on long bike rides.

WHAT SHE KNOWS

Cleopatra
Coleman CLEOPATRA COLEMAN
SHE’S A FAN OF B MOVIES. SIT
BACK, RELAX, AND CHECK OUT THE CV
HER TOP 5. / BY TYLER DASWICK Fox’s The Last
Man on Earth; Step
Up Revolution

1 Miami Connection
1987
THE LIST
The best worst
movies of all time
The plot A rock band of martial artists
THE PLUG
squares off against a ninja biker gang.
She stars in White
Watch it when ... you’re on a guy trip. Famous, a series
Coleman loves the cult masterpiece loosely based on
for its “cool music, great martial arts, Jamie Foxx, air-
and dubbing that’s way out of sync.” A ing on Showtime
cold case of beer only makes it better.

2 Teen Witch
1989

The plot A high schooler finds out she

has magic powers. But will she be able
to brew a cauldron of hot romance?
Watch it when ... you can’t take
another sappy holiday movie. It’s not
family friendly, so try it as a stay-in date
to neutralize the Hallmark schlock.

Styling: Annabelle Harron/The Wall Group, hair: Alexander Armand, makeup: Roxy/Giorgio Armani Beauty; AG top, Self-Portrait shorts, Jimmy Choo shoes
3 Troll 2
1990

The plot A family’s vacation spot is

populated by ravenous goblins.
Watch it when ... you think you’re
having family issues. It isn’t until
you watch monsters feed on your
mother’s corpse that you learn to truly
value time with your loved ones.

4 Night of the Living Dead

1968

The plot After a zombie outbreak,

a group of survivors barricade
themselves in a rickety old farmhouse.
Watch it when ... a rough week leaves
you feeling like a working stiff. Duane
Jones, the lead, stays composed while
the world around him panics.

5 Night of the Comet

1984

The plot A comet wipes out most of

the planet. Two teenagers survive, but
they have to fight off zombie cannibals.
Watch it when ... you need to restore
your faith in humanity. It’s a reminder
that there’s some good to be gleaned
from any disaster—with the right team.

32 MensHealth.com / December 2017 PHOTOGRAPH BY CHRIS McPHERSON

 USEFUL STUFF
BINGE TRAINING
Carve Runestone-Hard Abs
THE BLOODSHED-FILLED FIFTH SEASON OF VIKINGS PREMIERES NOVEMBER 29 ON HISTORY. THIS DUAL
CIRCUIT WILL BURN BODY FAT, PILLAGE YOUR CORE, AND FORGE A BODY THE GODS WILL ENVY.
WOR KOU T A
NEEDS: A TOWEL, YOUR FLOOR
MOVES: DO EACH MOVE FOR
30 SECONDS; THEN REST FOR 15
SECONDS. DO 4 ROUNDS.
Body Saw
Assume a plank position, your toes on the towel.
Using your forearms, push your body back as
far as you can, sliding the towel along. Return
to the starting position. Maintain a tight core and
squeeze your glutes throughout the move.
WOR KOU T B
Towel Reverse Lunge
Stand with your right foot on a towel. Slide your
MADE/NOUN PROJECT (helmet icon)
right foot backward on the towel, bending your
left knee. Stand up by driving through your left
foot and sliding your right foot forward. Do reps
for 30 seconds. Switch sides and repeat.
THIS MONTH’S BRINGER OF BRAWN: Sean Garner, N.S.C.A., Anatomy at 1220, Miami
ILLUSTRATIONS BY BRANDON LOVING
STEP 4: OUTFIT YOUR FEET
Clif Bar CEO Kevin Cleary laces up
Hoka One One shoes. “I go faster and
farther, with less wear on my legs.”
Hollow-Body Hold Plank Rear Delt Raise
Lie on your back with legs straight, knees Assume a pushup position. Extend your
together, and arms extended over your head. right arm out to the side, squeezing your shoul-
Press your lower back into the floor and con- der blades together. Return to the pushup
tract your abs to lift your shoulders just off the position and repeat. Continue for 30 seconds
floor. Then lift your legs off the floor and hold. and then repeat with your left arm.
VIEWING PARTY
WHENEVER A
FIGHT BREAKS
OUT, HOLD A
STANDARD PLANK
FOR 10 SECONDS.
Towel Leg Curl Squat Jump
Lie on your back with your legs straight out Stand with your feet hip-width apart. Push your
and both heels on a towel. Slide your feet back hips back and lower your body until your thighs
toward your hips as you lift your lower back off are nearly parallel to the floor. Explosively stand
the floor, squeezing your glutes and hamstrings. up and jump. Let your knees bend as you land;
Return to the starting position and repeat. then drop into another squat and jump again.
@SeanGarner
MensHealth.com / December 2017 33
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 USEFUL STUFF STEP 5: CONQUER THIS TOWN
Hoka One One president Wendy Yang
loves Big Sky, Montana, for hiking
in summer and skiing in winter.

THE SQUAD

Pack Smart, Travel Easy

VETERAN GLOBETROTTERS NAME THE ESSENTIALS THEY NEVER FORGET TO CARRY. / BY TYLER DASWICK

2
3

THE BEST
PODCASTS
1. ALTON BROWN 2. ROB HAMMER 3. ARI SHAPIRO 4. TOM RIELLY 5. CASEY MURRAY
FOR TRAVEL
Host of Food California-based Host of the All Fellows program Commercial
Network’s Iron sports/adventure Things Considered and community pilot, Southwest LEFT-BRAINED:
Chef Showdown photographer podcast for NPR director, TED Airlines SCIENCE VS
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makes it super pack- freebies the airlines with Obama on Air which Rielly found sweet oblivion as you song by song,
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great Americano out plugs are included under my suit jacket,” definitely a because- thrum of the bass, the My Beautiful
of a couple of pieces so you can block out he says. “It let me stick they-can feature,” he snap of the snare— Dark Twisted
Fantasy.
of plastic,” Brown toddler squeals (and to the dress code says, “but it’s brighter without the intrusion
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too. $30, amazon.com $14, amazon.com $475, vince.com $90, amazon.com oppodigital.com

34 MensHealth.com / December 2017 PHOTOGRAPH BY YASU + JUNKO

L I F E I S A B O U T M O M E N T S

STEEL, 42 MM
SELF-WINDING
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 USEFUL STUFF STEP 6: WITNESS HISTORY
Chelsi Moy, PR manager at the Big Sky
Resort, has a must-watch doc: 100
Years: One Woman’s Fight for Justice.

MUST-READS

Make Better Decisions—and Pizza Chicken

THE BEST PICKS OF 2017? WE’LL LEAVE THAT TO THE CRITICS. WRESTLE WITH THESE
AND YOU’LL BE BETTER OFF. / BY DANIEL DUANE, PAUL KITA, AND BRAD WIENERS

BIG BAD BIOGRAPHY

GO DEEP
“He openly attacked
CROSSINGS: A American racism at a
DOCTOR-SOLDIER’S time when the nation’s
STORY
By Jon Kerstetter black athletes...were
How do you reconcile expected to...thank
war and “first, do
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STUCK the white power struc-
physician? Publish IN LINE? ture that gave them
your stunning mem- the opportunity to earn
oirs, evidently. wealth and celebrity,
KILLERS OF and to otherwise keep
THE FLOWER MOON PICK UP their mouths shut.
AUTUMN
By David Grann
One of those “How BY KARL Ali’s mouth was seldom
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OVE
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before?” true- GAARD author of Ali: A Life
crime exposés about
the chilling case Turn to page
that made the FBI. 123. Read the
two-page Hear
THE INVENTION (1 minute, Not up for an Ali tome?
OF NATURE 45 seconds) Go 12 rounds with Eig’s
By Andrea Wolf chapter, Chasing Ali podcast.
The age of discov- “Infants,” on
ery comes roaring what is argu-
back to modernity
in a biography of ably life’s
“the Shakespeare of greatest joy.
science,” German Looking up,
naturalist Alexan- you’ll love
der von Humboldt. that you’re in DINNER:
the holiday CHANGING
crush. Well, THE GAME
no. But it’s a BY MELISSA
CLARK
damn fine
reverie. Always asking “What’s for
PRINCIPLES supper?” This book answers.
BY RAY DALIO

PAIN +
Pizza Chicken

Five-Spice Duck Breasts

REFLECTION Jalapeño-Honey Steak

= PROGRESS
Chile & Ginger Fried
Tofu Salad

TRUST US ON THAT LAST ONE

That’s the multibillionaire Clark’s secret? Lightly
hedge fund manager’s formula dust firm tofu in cornstarch
for learning from your mistakes
JOEL ARBAJE (books), MICHAEL BRANDON MYERS (icons)

before frying for crispy

and making your own luck. It’s (not soggy) results.
a counterintuitive leadership
primer packed with tough-love
maxims, like the three below. BECOME A GREAT COOK
+ USING ONE BOOK
1. Don’t confuse what you wish SALT, FAT, ACID, HEAT
were true with what is really true. BY SAMIN NOSRAT
Nosrat will make a bona fide cook
2. Recognize that conflicts are out of any willing rookie, because
essential to great relationships. while she has lots of fine recipes,
she’s stronger on technique. Master
3. Don’t blame bad outcomes the art of braising, for starters, and
on anyone but yourself. eat through your best winter ever.

36 MensHealth.com / December 2017 ILLUSTRATION BY TIM TOMKINSON

 USEFUL STUFF

T H E G I R L S N E X T DO OR
ASK THEM ANYTHING—AND WE MEAN ANYTHING—ABOUT LOVE AND SEX

NAOMI PIERCEY LI JUN LI MARISSA TINDER COACH

IS POURING, (CHICAGO P.D.) GAINSBURG Naomi offers gentle fixes
AND HER FILMS IN IS A WOMEN’S
MEET THE FRIENDS ARE VANCOUVER, HEALTH MAG for ill-conceived profiles.
GIRLS DISHING. LIVES IN NYC. FITNESS EDITOR.

1. Framing. Not loving that

clutter. Clean up so she doesn’t

Universal/Everett Collection (Jones and Schwarzenegger), courtesy Naomi Piercey (Piercey), Celia Au/courtesy Li Jun Li (Li), JOEL ARBAJE (Gainsburg)
get hung up on your decorating.

2. Bio. Okay, the shuffleboard bit

is cute. But good grammar is sexy.

This time of year she’s stressed and

This isn’t your AOL away message.

snaps at me. What’s my play? Troy, Ann Arbor, MI 3. Song. A bit bleak, no? I’m sure
it’s a great tune, but the title loses
NAO MI: Okay, you know not to ask if she’s LILI: I want him to say, “Is there anything I can
points for scannability. Lighten up!

PMS-ing, right? Also: Don’t walk out. Stay in do?” If I snap “No!” he should say, “Well, I’m
the room. Know she loves you but is having a here if you need me”—not “Okay, leaving now.” COMMON GROUND
bit of a meltdown. She might just want you to MARISSA: It’s probably not about you. But if it

stick around and prove you can deal. is and you know it, just apologize. Don’t ask,
LILI: Be there, be open, but don’t try to solve it. “Is it something I did?” That’s the worst. SHE WANTS YOU WANT
NAOMI: Yeah, she doesn’t have to have a rea- LILI: My reaction to that might be “It’s not all
HORSE-DRAWN SNOW-
SLEIGH MOBILING
son. We’re not always reasonable. about you!” But then again, it’s all in the tone.
MARISSA: She may feel like you’re not paying NAOMI: It’s like Drake says: “Call me on my

attention. If she’s cooking and you’re on the
couch, get up and talk to her. Don’t point out
her bitchiness—kill her with kindness until
she realizes, Damn, I’m being a turd.
cellphone.” Meaning, speak her “language COMPROMISE: SLEDDING!
of love.” Talk to her the way she likes to com- NOSTALGIC CHARM WITH A LITTLE
municate so you can get to the best part: the DANGER, NAOMI SAYS. SHARE A SLED
AND YOU’RE SPOONING. UPGRADE:
makeup sex. That’s the whole point, right? DOGSLED! SOME TOURS LET YOU DRIVE.

NAOMI SAYS NAOMI SAYS

SAY THIS, 52%
“What’s the Asking if some-
94%
“Take a deep Neither option
NOT THAT matter?” thing’s wrong breath.” is a great one,
We asked 181 48%
implies you can’t but “calm down”
tell. Show her is far more
women which “Is something that you’re pay- 6% likely to get
phrase is better. wrong?” ing attention. “Calm down.” you in trouble.

38 MensHealth.com / December 2017

 Know Your Diamond
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Look for diamonds graded by GIA, the creator of the 4Cs.

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 Don’t Lag on Form Have a friend
keep an eye on your reps every so
often; even form can be a game.

STRENGTH
If you can’ t have fun,
there’s no sense in doing it.
—Paul Walker

Power Up Fitness doesn’t

have to be joyless.
Training at Switch Playground in Man-
hattan feels more like a party than a workout. Bright

Your Best You can make your

workout fun and
lights flash as a DJ spins the latest tracks from Drake
and Rihanna while you and your partner sweat through

Body Ever still be in the best

shape of your life.
a series of workout stations. In fact, there are more ways
than ever these days—from boutique gyms to iPhone apps
BY EMILY ABBATE to upgraded virtual reality fitness devices—to infuse

ILLUSTRATIONS BY MICHAEL BRANDON MYERS MensHealth.com / December 2017 41

 STRENGTH

your workouts with the joy of play. The goal,

of course, is to forget that your abs are on fire
and your arms are turning to jelly. “Time
spent in a gym doing something that feels
like work just adds to the hours we spend at
work in our day,” says Lenny Wiersma, Ph.D.,
a sports psychologist at Cal State Fullerton.
“Play provides a ton of benefits, and you expe-
rience intrinsic motivation.” Level up your
own daily workouts with these six ideas from
the gamification age.

UNDER ARMOUR SHORTS (ROWER); NIKE

SHORTS, C9 CHAMPION TANK (KETTLEBELL);
REEBOK SHOES (BOTH). LOCATION: CROSSFIT
PROSPECT HEIGHTS, BROOKLYN, NEW YORK

1
WIN THE NUMBERS GAME
T U T O R I A L Trying to DIFFICULTY LEVEL
beat your own work-
out records isn’t as
fun as chasing your CHEAT CODE Use
this one only
friends’ top scores for workouts
in the mile or some that include time
other fitness chal- requirements,
lenge, says Reebok such as AMRAP (as
trainer Conor Murphy. many rounds/reps
Start a Facebook as possible).
group with pals to
BOSS BATTLE
keep track of the best
Can’t beat the
times in classic work- record? You have
outs. Whenever you to buy dinner for

3
train, aim to surpass the group champ
someone in the group. on Friday night.
ROW YOUR BOAT
T U T O R I A L Grab a friend and a rowing machine or assault bike and try this
game from Ryan Wilke of Throwback Fitness, a group-focused studio in

2
Manhattan. You will do a round on the equipment, rowing or biking until
your pal finishes a three-exercise circuit (think 15 kettlebell swings, goblet
squats, and overhead presses). Alternate until you both complete 3 rounds
of each. Whoever burns more calories on the rower or bike wins.

R-E-P-S DIFFICULTY LEVEL CHEAT CODE BOSS BATTLE Set

Keep the total a calorie goal
T U T O R I A L Take the DIFFICULTY LEVEL reps in each before starting.
rules of Horse off the round to 30 Work until you
hoops court and into to 45 per set. both reach it.
the gym. Have your CHEAT CODE Set
the rep targets
Grooming: Marco Campos/Kiehls Hair & Skincare

partner start, picking high enough to

an exercise and a rep challenge your
goal. If he misses, it’s partner but not TOUCH- SPAR! (free, iOS)
Nothing keeps you accountable to a daily
your turn to pick a too high (shoot SCREEN workout like SPAR! does. Money is on the line
move; but if he hits,
PLAY
for 20 to 30 reps
you need to do it. Miss per set). if you don’t video check-in with your crew.
it, and you get the Two fun apps
letter R. Miss another,
BOSS BATTLE You
that can help Charity Miles (free, iOS/Android)
don’t just gain Get in shape for a good cause. Charity Miles
and you get an E. Spell a letter when you you hot-wire
“reps” and you lose— tracks your mileage and donates money (up
miss reps; you your fitness. to 25 cents a mile) to a cause of your choice.
and do a move of your also owe your part-
friend’s choosing. ner 5 burpees.

42 MensHealth.com / December 2017 PHOTOGRAPHS BY JUSTIN STEELE

4 5
PICK UP THE PACE ROLL THE DICE BULLETIN
T U T O R I A L The tread- DIFFICULTY LEVEL T U T O R I A L Bring a pair DIFFICULTY LEVEL
mill beckons. You of dice with you to STRENGTH
and your brethren in the weight room. Pick
speed grab adjoin- CHEAT CODE It’s five exercises. Then, CHEAT CODE This
ing treadmills and better (as in more for each move, roll is single-player
tackle 30 seconds of fun) with a group. the dice twice. Add gamification.
max-effort running, the two numbers;
BOSS BATTLE The BOSS BATTLE
followed by 30 sec- that’s how many reps
person trailing Finished all the
onds of rest. After 10 after each inter- you’ve got on deck moves? Roll one
minutes, the person val starts the for each move. Work die. Do that many
with the farthest dis- rest period catch- through 4 rounds reps of the first
tance earns the win. ing the leader. total of that circuit. exercise. LIFT WEIGHT,
EASE STRESS
Strength training isn’t all

6
about muscle; it may relieve

FORCE A FACE-OFF DIFFICULTY LEVEL anxiety in healthy adults as

well as in people with physical
and mental illnesses, a
T U T O R I A L Grab a partner and pick an exercise CHEAT CODE A good University of Limerick
you can both do facing each other, such as a way to finish off analysis found. Researchers
dumbbell curl. Stare each other down, about a a workout.
point to the benefits of social
foot apart. Let your partner do 1 rep; then you BOSS BATTLE Amp interaction. Try group
do a rep. Your partner then does 2 reps before up the challenge training if you’re stressed.
you do 2 reps. Alternate and continue laddering by adding 5 reps
up until one of you runs out of gas. every turn.

TRACK MILES,
NOT MINUTES
To lose weight in a walking/
running program, focus on
distance, not time. Troy
University researchers who
studied 15 overweight people
found that on average, those
with distance goals lost 8.8
pounds, while time-focused
people actually gained over 2
pounds. One possible reason:
The latter may have over-
estimated calories burned.

WORK OUT
TO GET AHEAD
So the boss wants you to
produce? Ask for a gym
subsidy. University of Texas
research of 6,500 workers
over three years found that
those who did at least five
days of cardio (20 to 30
minutes a pop) and two days
of strength training each
week gained over an hour in
added productivity per week.

MensHealth.com / December 2017 43

 STRENGTH

GEEK TWEAKS

Please Hold for FOREARM EXTENSORS

More Muscle The muscles on the

back of your fore-
arm work together
7 WAYS TO KEEP STRENGTH AND POWER
in order to open
FROM SLIPPING THROUGH YOUR FINGERS. your fingers and
BY ANDREW HEFFERNAN, C . S .C . S .

I
extend your wrist
backward.

TRAIN THEM
In the niche sport Spread and open
of c omp e t it i v e your hands as
wide as you can
gripping (yes, you while bending
read that right), your wrists
back. Hold for 30
few feats are as seconds. Rest;
impressive as the then repeat.
double-plate pinch
THENAR MUSCLES
hold with two old-school York
Barbell 45-pound plates. These help your
thumb pinch
Plate pinching sounds simple: toward your
Set a pair of 2-inch-thick plates fingers, and they FOREARM FLEXORS
don’t get much
on their edges (smooth sides out), love in most The muscles on the
pinch them between your thumb gym workouts. pinky side of your
lower arm help
and fingers, lift them to waist TRAIN THEM grab and grip: key
height, and hold. But in practice? Plate pinches. actions in nearly
Start with two all sports.
The plates’ surfaces challenge 5-pounders,
even the fittest guys. smooth sides TRAIN THEM Do
out. Work up to a wrist curls or any
It’s a challenge you should 60-second hold. of the challenging
try (but start with modern 5s): moves at the bottom
of the next page.
A large study suggests a link
between weaker grip and higher
risk of cardiovascular disease
and early death. Plus, a weak grip
is an invitation for injury.
A strong grasp can also help
PINCH PERFECT
you lift more and rack up gym
PRs. “Often it’s your hands that The smooth-sides-
out plate pinch
limit you when you lift,” says is a gold standard
Jedd Johnson, a five-time North of grip strength,
but it’s not the
American Grip Sport champ. only way.
Want to hone a viselike grip?
STRUGGLING?
Here are four ways to do it . Turn the smooth
sides of the
plates inside and
hold; you’ll still
1. CRUSH IT train your thenar
muscles, but it’s
Whenever you pick up a weight, slightly easier.
squeeze the bar as tightly as you
can. Actually, “crush the bar to
a pulp,” says Pavel Tsatsouline,
CEO of StrongFirst. Amp it up
by squeezing your nonworking
hand on single-arm moves like
dumbbell rows.

44 MensHealth.com
 2. GET FAT
Find extra-thick barbells, dumb-
bells, or handles for all your
TRUE GRIPS Give yourself a hand.

deadlifts and pulling exercises.

Don’t have a fat bar? Find a towel On lighter sets, use a While the monkey
and wrap it around a standard conventional double- grip (fingers and
bar to make it more difficult to overhand grip. But thumb on the same
on your heaviest sets, side of the bar) is
grasp. The larger bars—which use a mixed grip—one sometimes advised
are roughly twice the thickness palm facing you for shoulder comfort,
of a standard bar—force you to and the other facing it makes you more
away. This keeps the liable to drop the bar.
squeeze harder to get a secure barbell more secure Always wrap your
grip, so relatively light weights Deadlift throughout the move. Bench Press thumb around the bar
feel heavier, Johnson says. Use a mixed grip to Each set, switch it up Wrap your thumb; and focus on the dis-
handle heavy loads. (so the hand facing skip the monkey grip. tance between your
you now faces away) hands. Keep your fore-
to avoid repeatedly arms perpendicular to
3. HANG OUT twisting your back in the floor when the bar
one direction. touches your chest.
For manlier mitts, strength
coach Dan John recommends
adding this simple challenge into Stick to a standard This one is all about
double-overhand hand placement. To
your workout once a week: Do a grip, with your thumb determine your opti-
pullup and then hang on the bar outside your fin- mum hand position,
for 30 seconds. Without letting go gers, wrapping your hold the bar in front
fingers tightly. Elite of your thighs, extend
of the bar, repeat until your grip powerlifters may tell your thumbs so they
fails or you can’t complete a pull- you to use the hook point toward each
up. Ten reps translates into five- grip (wrapping your other, and shift your
Olympic Lift fingers around both Power Clean hands so your thumbs
plus minutes on the bar—and your thumb and the just touch the sides
The hook grip may Put your hands just
proof that you have a badass grip. bar) on snatches of your legs. This will
not be the best here. outside your hips.
and power cleans. If enable your knuckles
you’re not a powerlift- to rest outside your
ing beast, you might shoulders when the
4. MIX IT UP want to reconsider. bar is at your chest.
Your brain’s motor cortex puts
to work more than 30 muscles
You want the bar You may not be
just to control your hand. To across the front of thinking about your
strengthen all that sinew, think your shoulders, using grip when you go for
outside the barbell. “Towels an overhand grip. If a run, but you should
that causes shoulder, be, says ultramara-
hanging from the bar, thick elbow, or wrist pain, thoner Adam Chase,
ropes, and PVC pipes all place a just tie wrist straps author of The Ultimate
different demand on your grip,” or ropes to the bar, Guide to Trail Running.
grab the ends, and Avoid clenching your
says MH fitness advisor David then lift your elbows fists when you run,
Front Squat Running
Jack. Each week, do at least three Can’t grab the bar?
high beneath the
Keep your hands
and focus on keeping
sets of towel pullups or chinups, bar. This will allow your hands relaxed
Use your wraps. loose and relaxed.
you to grip the bar and loose, minimizing
PVC drags or carries, or pulling even if you have forearm strain and
exercise variations with ropes. mobility limitations. conserving energy.
+ISM (“True Grips” illustrations), SODAVEKT (circle icons)

GETTING A FIRM GRASP TO BEEF UP YOUR GRIP, END EACH OF YOUR WORKOUTS WITH ONE OF THESE TECHNIQUES.

KETTLEBELL CRUSH TOWEL GRIP BOTTOMS UP

Squeeze a kettle- Drape a towel over On kettlebell
bell by its sides a bar. Do chinups shoulder and
as if you’re try- or pullups, one floor presses,
ing to deflate a hand grasping the hold the kettle-
basketball. Hinge towel, the other bell with the
forward and do the bar. Switch weight pointing
rows. Do 3 sets of hands each set. Do up. Do 3 sets
10 to 12 reps. 4 sets of 4 to 6. of 10 to 12.

ILLUSTRATION BY T.M. DET WILER MensHealth.com / December 2017 45

 STRENGTH
Greatest Holiday HIITs
Staying fit in December isn’t
easy. So here’s our holiday gift to
you: a half dozen exercises that
you can mix in infinite ways for a
brief, convenient, intense, fat-
burning, strength-building
workout. Do them in the gym, at
home, or anywhere at all.
Have nine minutes to kill wait-
ing for the kids to see Santa at the
46 MensHealth.com / December 2017
mall? Do the last three exercises.
Got 15 minutes before the office
holiday party? Pick five moves.
The principle behind these
combinations is high-intensity
interval training, or HIIT. It’s
simple: You do timed bursts
of exercise interspersed with
periods of brief rest. HIIT
can improve cardiovascular
For the optimal benefit,
complete a session at
least 3 or 4 times a week.
Grooming: Eloise Cheung/Make Up Forever/Kate Ryan
STANDARD VERSION Select
3 to 5 moves. Do each
health and preserve or even add for 3 minutes, working
muscle mass, studies show. in 30-second intervals
This dose of HIIT, from Jeff (20 on, 10 off).
Cavaliere, C.S.C.S., M.S.P.T., creator EL DIABLO Pick 4 moves;
of Athlean-X, couldn’t come at do each for 1 minute.
a better time. Rest 20 seconds between
moves, 1 minute between
REEBOK SHOES, RHONE rounds. Do as many
SHORTS, UNDER ARMOUR rounds as possible.
TIGHTS, 2XU TANK
PHOTOGRAPHS BY BEN GOLDSTEIN
 5

1. Two-Point 2. Dumbbell 3. Dumbbell 4. Split Squat 5. Mountain 6. Single-

Renegade Row Thruster Squat Curl Press Lateral Hop Mule Kick Arm Burpee
Assume a high Hold a pair of 25- Place 25-pound (or Assume a split stance, Start in a high pushup Stand with your left
pushup position, your pound (or lighter) lighter) dumbbells your left foot for- position. Kick both hand on your chest.
hands on 15-pound dumbbells at your about shoulder-width ward. Squat until your legs up as if you’re Bend your knees
(or lighter) dumbbells. shoulders. Keeping apart on the floor. left knee is bent 90 doing a handstand. and fold forward until
Lift your left leg and your chest up, squat Squat to grasp them degrees. Before your Land with your right your right hand hits
pull that knee toward until your thighs are underhand, and then right knee hits the knee tucked toward the floor. Hop your
your chest. Lift the parallel to the floor. stand with them as floor, hop slightly left, your chest and your legs to a plank and
right dumbbell and Stand back up and you keep your chest staying in a split squat left leg back. Then touch your chest to
pull it toward your hip. raise the dumbbells up. When they’re at position. Hop back drive your left knee the floor. Push back
Return to the pushup until your arms are your waist, curl them right, then up. Land toward your chest as up (knees on the floor
position. Repeat, this straight overhead. to your shoulders. in a split stance, right you straighten your if needed) and stand.
time moving your Then lower them Press them overhead. foot forward. Repeat right leg back. Repeat, Repeat with your
right leg and the left back to your shoul- Reverse the move- the sequence. Too leading with your other arm. Too hard?
weight. That’s 1 rep. ders. That’s 1 rep. ments. That’s 1 rep. hard? Do jump lunges. left knee. That’s 1 rep. Do a regular burpee.
Remove Salt from Leather Wipe boots with
a soft rag and a 2:1 water-to-vinegar solution.
Wipe them clean with water and let them air-dry.

STYLE
All it takes are a few s imple
outfits. And there’s one secret: The
s impler the better. —Car y Grant

M H

WINTER
FIEL D GU IDE
2 017

Reboot When the weather

turns cold, turn up
Function comes first in winter, which
means your footwear is all-important. But boots don’t

Your Winter your style with these

seasonal essentials.
have to be boring, says Toronto stylist Jake Mossop. “Look
for a rugged pair that’s also colorful.” Check out the wing-

Wardrobe BY DAN MICHEL tips above from Swims: A waterproof membrane keeps
your dogs dry, while brogue detailing adds sophistication.
Read on for more ways to heat up your cold-weather look.

PHOTOGRAPHS BY JAMIE CHUNG MensHealth.com / December 2017 49

 STYLE

1
New School Bag
Move the weight of
your daily schlep
to your shoulders
and look super-
smart with this
luxe backpack.

1. SHINOLA BACKPACK,
$995; 2. TOMMY
HILFIGER SWEATER, $225
3. LUIGI BIANCHI MAN-
TOVA COAT, $1,295; 4. TO
BOOT NEW YORK BOOTS,
$450. PREVIOUS PAGE:
MICHAEL KORS JEANS,
2 $148; BOMBAS SOCKS,
$12; SWIMS BOOTS, $225

Make It a Cinch

Prop styling: Alex Brannian/Art Dept,

PETER ARKLE (animal illustrations)
Keep your Sunday
vibe alive every
day of the work-
week with dressy
pants that have a
comfy waistband.

TOMMY HILFIGER PANTS,

$150
3

MAKE THE HOST HAPPY

For a cocktail party, you can’t go wrong with a bar-related gift,
says Tariq Dixon of TRNK, a home furnishing site for men.

THE GIFT THE DRINK

The brass accents will take
on an elegant patina as time
goes by. Now that’s class.
RBT ICE BUCKET, $80
TRNK BOTTLE OPENER, $44
The Kizuki Simple
Japanese Highball
Kevin Yu, owner of
Kizuki Ramen and
Izakaya in Chicago,
shares the perfect
recipe for appreci-
ating the subtlety
of Japanese spirits.
1 part Japanese
whisky (try Suntory
Hibiki Harmony)
2 parts tonic
2 parts soda water
Garnish the glass
with an orange peel
or lemon peel.

50 MensHealth.com / December 2017

MICHAEL BRANDON MYERS
(icons, bear on badge)

M H

WINTER
FIEL D GU IDE
2 017

Woolly Mammoth
Shearling is wool,
but instead of THE NEW SLIM
shaving the sheep,
they skin it.
PUFFY JACKET
(Hey, deal with it.)
So it’s warm! Stand Performance Down
out with a bold These jackets are nearly
hue like this blue. as warm as shearling but
much lighter in weight.
BONOBOS JACKET,
$1,200
Chin Flair
Big patterns and
chunky textures
lend a casual
feel; solid, muted
colors and fine
knits are for
dressing up. Try
brands like J.Crew
and Club Monaco.
MOOSE KNUCKLES CANADA, $385
FROM LEFT: UNIQLO,
$30; GAP, $45; TED
BAKER LONDON, $79

PATAGONIA, $229
 STYLE
M H

Get a Grip
Knit gloves are
cozy, but leather
WINTER
FIEL D GU IDE
is what you want
for a solid grip 2 017
on a steering
wheel. Leather
stretches, so buy
your gloves a half
size too small.
Banana Republic
gloves, $90

CHEERS! YOUR
PERFECT TOAST
What to say the next time
you address a thirsty crowd.

1
Pick Your Angle
Are you going for
laughs or for tears? If
it’s a close friend or
casual crowd, go for
funny. If it’s a formal
event or a colleague
from work, be sincere.

2
Talk About the Past
Recall a time when
your friend helped
you out of a bind or
pulled a crazy prank.
Go deep on the
details. Embellishing
is encouraged!

3
Connect the Dots
Tie your story to the
present. Recall how it
shaped your view of
the person and why
you’re drinking in his or
her honor. Just keep it
under two minutes.
Source: Victoria Wellman, cofounder,
The Oratory Laboratory, NYC

THE PARTY JACKET Not everyone wants to be a peacock. Find your comfort level from classic to wild.
CLASSIC WILD

$598 $895 $350 $400 $250 $645

MICHAEL KORS BURBERRY TALLIA ORANGE BONOBOS PER RY EL L IS TED BAKER

A burgundy sweater This check is auto- Flip the lapel on this Pair this with some- Velvet is a big trend Dark shades make
or shirt will empha- matically festive, so classic plaid jacket thing navy if you lately, says stylist a bold pattern more
size the pattern. pair it with neutrals, to reveal leather want to tone it down, Samantha Brown. wearable. Add a
Black jeans or trou- like a white shirt trim. Keep the rest or burgundy if “It has just the right navy or black turtle-
sers finish the look. and indigo jeans. subtle and solid. you’re feeling bold. amount of flash.” neck and jeans.

52 MensHealth.com / December 2017

 INSIDEOUT EVENTS &
PROMOTIONS
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Having the right amount of
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vitafusion™ Everyday Energy
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“Dunkirk” opens as hundreds of thousands of British and Allied

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HEY WEATHER:
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 STYLE
Turn Back Time with Tech
DEFY AGE WITH THESE CUTTING-EDGE NONSURGICAL TREATMENTS. / BY GRANT STODDARD
PROBLEM HOW IT WORKS
YELLOW A dentist combines a bleaching
agent with a laser to speed up the
TEETH process. “At-home bleaching can
ASK FOR work, but it can take forever to
Laser Teeth see results,” says Jennifer Stachel,
Whitening D.M.D., who uses a 30-minute LED
system called GLO on her patients.
DOUBLE Kybella is a synthesized deoxy-
cholic acid, which is a naturally
CHIN occurring molecule in your body
ASK FOR that aids in the breakdown and
Kybella absorption of dietary fat. When
Kybella is injected into your chin, it
melts away fat in that area.
LOVE During this FDA-approved chill-
HANDLES and-kill treatment, a device is
attached to your problem area. For
ASK FOR an hour, temperatures cold enough
Cool- to destroy fat cells target the area.
Sculpting Your body will naturally metabolize
and expel the dead cells.
DEEP A dermatologist applies a high-
energy laser in a grid pattern to an
WRINKLES area that strengthens the collagen.
ASK FOR “This causes the collagen to con-
Laser Skin tract, reducing the appearance of
Resurfacing deeper wrinkles,”says Babar Rao,
M.D., of Rao Dermatology.
Flash that smile: A laser whitening procedure is performed in the New York City office of Pia Lieb, D.D.S.
54 MensHealth.com / December 2017
WHAT TO EXPECT COST/TREATMENT
Any bleach removes a layer $150 to $600
of tooth material called calcium
phosphate, so you may have some
Typically requires
one treatment.
sensitivity. The layer will return
after three to four days. Until then,
avoid foods and drinks that stain,
like berries, coffee, and red wine.
The treatment takes only about $600+
three minutes, says Anthony Youn,
M.D., a Michigan-based plastic sur-
Based on the size of
the area covered.
geon. You may feel a slight burning May require multiple
sensation for five to 10 minutes treatments.
and mild soreness later. But recov-
ery is relatively pain-free.
You’ll experience tingling, pain, $1,500
bruising, numbness, and swell-
BROWN BIRD DESIGN (illustrations), MICHAEL BRANDON MYERS (icons)
($750 per side)
ing for a few weeks, but there’s May require
effectively no real downtime, says additional treatments.
Joseph Eviatar, M.D., of Omni Aes-
thetic MD in New York City. Best of
all, the fat cells are gone for good.
A topical numbing cream makes $800+
the session bearable, but generally
it hurts. Days later, skin hardens,
May require
multiple treatments.
scabs, and eventually flakes off,
and your face is a little pink for a
week or longer. Don’t do it more
than twice a year, says Dr. Rao.
PHOTOGRAPH BY DINA LITOVSKY
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N O W F O R O U R L O W E S T P R I C E S I N Y E A R S .*

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*This statement has not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure or prevent any disease.
Swaps for the Top Not a cilantro
fan? You can scatter on some
mint, basil, scallions, or edamame.

FOOD
I once put instan t coffee
in my microwave oven
and almost wen t back in time.
—Steven Wright

6 Microwave Want to ace your

next at-home feast?
That microwave on your countertop can
do so much more than just heat leftover pizza. “People

Muscle Meals Start thinking

inside the box.
crave efficiency, so they should call on the microwave
more often to steam and heat where browning isn’t
BY MATTHEW KADEY, R.D. required,” says chef Keith Schroeder, author of Mad Deli-
cious. It’s a truly ingenious invention. So put it to use and
craft sensational original meals, not just reheat old ones.

PHOTOGRAPHS BY TRAVIS RATHBONE MensHealth.com / December 2017 57

 FOOD

STEAM/SIMMER BAKE KNOW

YOUR
POWER

SALMON SMOKY TOMATO CHICKEN Cooking times for

HOBO PACKETS
Fold two 14"×18" sheets of parch-
ment paper in half. Open them and
place 2 cups chopped broccoli, ½
sliced fennel bulb, and ½ sliced red
bell pepper on one side of each
sheet; top with a 6 oz salmon fillet.
Melt 1 Tbsp butter in a bowl. Stir
in 2 Tbsp orange juice plus 2 tsp
each orange zest and fresh thyme.
Spread this over the fish. Fold the
paper over the fish and crimp shut.
Microwave on high for 4 minutes;
these and most
AND CRAB SOUP PINEAPPLE CURRY recipes are based
on a 1,200-watt
oven, but not
In a 2-quart dish, mix 2 Tbsp In a large bowl, add 1 peeled and all microwaves
have that much
olive oil, 1 cup chopped yellow cubed sweet potato, 2 chopped power. To find
onion, 1 chopped red bell pepper, shallots, 2 chopped garlic cloves, your machine’s
2 chopped garlic cloves, and a 2 Tbsp water, and 1 Tbsp chopped wattage, look on
couple of pinches of salt. Cover ginger. Cover and cook on high for the back plate or
the dish and cook on high until the 5 minutes. Add 1 can (14 oz) coco- inside the door.
peppers are tender, about 2½ min- nut milk, 1 Tbsp red curry paste, Here are basic
utes. Add 1 can (28 oz) San Mar- and ½ tsp each salt and cinnamon; conversions from
zano tomatoes, 1 cup low-sodium puree. In another bowl, cook 1 lb a three-minute
cooking time in a
vegetable broth, 1 tsp smoked cubed chicken breast on high, cov- 1,200-watt oven.
paprika, and ¼ tsp freshly ground ered, for 2 minutes. Drain, add the
black pepper. Cover again and puree, cover, and heat on high till

TIME ADDED
add time (in 30-second intervals) heat on high for 5 minutes. Puree done (stir once), 6 minutes. Stir in 100%
until the salmon is cooked. Let the with ½ cup half and half. Season to 1 cup frozen peas, 1 cup diced pine-
parcels rest for 5 minutes. Open taste with more salt, if needed. Top apple, ⅓ cup cashews, and the juice 50%
ABOUT
them and sprinkle on 1 tsp black with lump crabmeat and minced of ½ lime; heat 30 seconds. Serve 15%
sesame seeds. Feeds 2. fresh chives to taste. Feeds 2. with rice and cilantro. Feeds 4.
1,000 800 600
Time Protein Time Protein Time Protein WATTS
15 minutes 39 grams 15 minutes 25 grams 20 minutes 18 grams

Food styling: Jamie Kimm, prop styling: Olga Grigorenko/Honey Artists, MICHAEL BRANDON MYERS (icons)

58 MensHealth.com / December 2017

 NUKE IT GOOD
Leftovers can be
great—or horrible,
if you reheat them
the wrong way.
Here’s the right way.

1 Don’t Go Deep
A shallow Corning-
Ware, glass, or other
microwave-safe dish
is best. Spread the
leftovers over the
entire dish. The larger
the surface area,
the less time needed
to reheat the food.

2 Organize
In the microwave,
the center of the dish
receives less energy
than the outside.
Arrange thinner, more
delicate foods (such
as broccoli florets
or the tails of shrimp)
toward the center.
Thick or tough parts,
like asparagus stalks,
can go closer to the
BAKE TOAST
edge of the dish.
BARBECUE MAPLE PECAN CINNAMON-
MEATLOAF GRANOLA CHILI SWEET
POTATO CHIPS
Combine 1 lb ground beef In a small bowl, mix ¼ cup each Slice 1 medium sweet potato
(80% lean), 1 cup grated carrot, of coconut oil and maple syrup very thinly. (Use a mandoline if you
½ cup minced onion, ½ cup bread and cook on high until liquefied, have one.) In a small bowl, toss the
crumbs or quick oats, ¼ cup BBQ 30 seconds. In a shallow dish, mix slices with 2 tsp oil, ½ tsp cinna-
3 Heat It All sauce, 3 Tbsp tomato paste, 1
large egg, 2 tsp dried thyme, ½ tsp
2 cups rolled oats, ½ cup chopped
pecans, ¼ cup sunflower seeds,
mon, ½ tsp chili powder, and ¼ tsp
salt. Then arrange the slices in a
Ironically, cold spots kosher salt, and ¼ tsp black pep- ⅓ cup coconut flakes, the zest of single layer on a parchment-lined
in reheated leftovers per. Press into an even layer in a 1 orange, and 1 tsp cinnamon. Mix plate. (You might have to do this
can be hotbeds for greased microwave-safe loaf pan; in the syrup and spread in an even in batches so the chips don’t turn
ANTHONY CALVERT (illustrations)

bacterial growth. To spread another ¼ cup barbecue
eliminate them (and sauce on top. Cover with a paper
reduce your odds towel and microwave on high until
of foodborne illness) cooked through (165°F), 12 min-
without overcooking utes. Let stand 5 minutes. Feeds 4.
everything else, give
the food a stir once or Time Protein
twice during cooking. 25 minutes 24 grams
layer. Nuke on high, stirring twice,
until the oats are crisped, 5 to 6½
minutes. Stir in ½ cup dried cher-
ries and cool to room temp. Feeds
8. Add on top of Greek yogurt.
Time Protein
12 minutes 15 grams
soggy.) Microwave the slices on
high until your chips are crispy,
about 3 minutes. Serve alongside
or crushed atop tacos. And they’re
great with guacamole. Feeds 2.
Time Protein
7 minutes 15 grams
 FOOD

EGGS ARE A SUPERB SOURCE OF COMPLETE PROTEIN,

The Deviled Details WITH 6 GRAMS APIECE, PLUS CHOLINE FOR METABOLISM.
BUT HARD-BOILED EGGS ARE BORING...UNTIL NOW.
GET CRACKING! / BY MATTHEW KADEY, R.D.

STEP STEP

1 2 FREESTYLE YOUR FLAVORS

BUILD
SMOKE AND FIRE WESTERN OMELET ZEST AND PESTO

ADD 1 tsp sriracha, 1 Tbsp chopped ADD ¼ cup minced bell pepper, ADD 2 Tbsp jarred green pesto,

YOUR BASE pickled jalapeño pepper

TOP Ground smoked paprika,
¼ cup minced red onion
TOP Finely diced thick-cut deli
2 tsp lemon zest
TOP Finely chopped roasted
pickled jalapeño slice ham, thinly sliced fresh chives unsalted almonds
You can cook your
own eggs, or you
can buy peeled
hard-boiled eggs
from a brand such
as Eggland’s Best.
They’re usually
around the dairy
case. Then follow
this deviled egg
master recipe.

1. Halve 6 cooked
eggs lengthwise with a SMOKED SALMON WITH FIXINS CURRY FIRE CAPRESE
sharp knife, wiping the
blade after each cut. ADD 2 oz chopped smoked salmon, ADD 2 tsp yellow curry powder, ADD 1 seeded and chopped plum
2. Scoop the yolks 1 Tbsp capers, 1 Tbsp lemon juice, 1 tsp Dijon mustard, 2 tsp tomato, ¼ cup chopped fresh
into a large bowl. Add 1 minced shallot, ¼ tsp cayenne rice vinegar, ¼ tsp chili powder mozzarella, 2 Tbsp minced basil
Food styling: Rebecca Jurkevich/Edge Reps, prop styling: Kaitlyn DuRoss/Honey Artists
2 Tbsp mayo, plain TOP Chopped fresh dill TOP Fresh cilantro leaves TOP Balsamic glaze
Greek yogurt, or sour
cream. (Greek yogurt
has a little more pro-
tein, but it doesn’t
matter at this amount.
Just pick your favor-
ite.) Using the back of
a fork, mash it all up.
Then drizzle in 2 Tbsp
canola or grapeseed
oil, stirring constantly
until it’s creamy and
fluffy. Season with salt.
3. Using a small
spoon, fill the whites BACON HORSERADISH HAIL CAESAR TEX-MEX
with the yolk mixture.
Per 2 halves (with ADD 1½ Tbsp prepared horse- ADD 6 minced anchovy fillets, ADD ⅓ cup black beans, 2 Tbsp
mayo): 152 calories, radish, 2 crumbled cooked 1 grated garlic clove, 2 tsp Dijon minced fresh cilantro, 1 minced
6g protein, 1g carbs bacon slices, ¼ tsp black pepper mustard, 1 Tbsp white wine vinegar chipotle in adobo, juice of ½ lime
(0g fiber), 14g fat TOP Chopped chives TOP Smoked paprika, Parmesan TOP Scallion greens, ground cumin

60 MensHealth.com / December 2017

 SHELL OUT 1. In a saucepan, boil 1 inch of water. Add a
steamer basket and the eggs. Steam 15 minutes.
Steam eggs for 2. Put the eggs in ice water for 30 minutes.
sunnier yolks and 3. Gently break the shells and start peeling from
easier peeling. the bottom end, where there’s an air pocket.

Follow the master recipe, mixing in the “add” ingredients after you stir in the oil. Then apply toppings to taste.

GREEN EGGS AND HAM BUFFALO CHICKEN PIZZA PARTY! RED BEET AND GOAT CHEESE

ADD ½ diced avocado, 2 Tbsp ADD ⅓ cup finely diced cooked ADD ¼ cup shredded mozzarella, ADD ¼ cup chopped pickled
chopped pickled jalapeño, 2 Tbsp chicken, 3 Tbsp finely diced celery, ¼ cup diced pepperoni, 3 Tbsp beets, 2 Tbsp of the beet liquid, ¼
minced onion, ½ tsp garlic powder 1 Tbsp white wine vinegar finely chopped sun-dried tomatoes cup goat cheese, 2 tsp lemon zest
TOP Chopped prosciutto TOP Blue cheese, hot sauce TOP Chopped fresh basil TOP Chopped fresh tarragon

MOROCCAN SPICE SOUR POWER CALIFORNIA ROLL PIMENTO CHEESE

ADD ⅓ cup prepared hummus, ADD ¼ cup chopped prepared ADD ¼ cup diced cucumber, 1 Tbsp ADD ¼ cup diced pimento, ¼ cup
2 tsp prepared harissa paste sauerkraut, 1 Tbsp cider vinegar, soy sauce, 1 Tbsp rice vinegar shredded cheddar, 1 grated garlic
TOP Pitted and finely chopped 1 tsp fennel seeds TOP Imitation crab strips, chopped clove, 1 tsp paprika
kalamata olives TOP Fresh thyme leaves pickled ginger, sesame seeds TOP Chopped walnuts

INDIAN MANGO V.I.P. JAMBALAYA KOREAN BBQ

SODAVEKT (icons)

ADD 2 Tbsp mango chutney, ADD 1 heaping Tbsp caviar ADD ¼ cup chopped cooked ADD ¼ chopped prepared kimchi,
¾ tsp garam masala spice blend, TOP Fresh jumbo lump crabmeat, andouille sausage, ¼ cup chopped ¼ cup finely chopped roast beef,
1 thinly sliced scallion (green part) minced fresh tarragon, more scallion, 1 tsp Cajun seasoning 1 tsp sesame oil
TOP Chopped shelled pistachios caviar if you’re a baller TOP Chopped fresh parsley leaves TOP Thinly sliced radish

PHOTOGRAPHS BY DANNY KIM

What is TRUVADA for PrEP?
TRUVADA for PrEP (pre-exposure prophylaxis) is a prescription
medicine that is used together with safer sex practices to help reduce
the risk of getting HIV-1 through sex. This use is only for HIV-negative
adults who are at high risk of getting HIV-1. To help determine your
risk of getting HIV-1, talk openly with your healthcare provider about
your sexual health.
Ask your healthcare provider if you have questions about how to
prevent getting HIV. Always practice safer sex and use condoms to
lower the chance of sexual contact with body fluids. Never reuse or
share needles or other items that have body fluids on them.
IMPORTANT SAFETY INFORMATION
What is the most important information I should know
about TRUVADA for PrEP?
Before taking TRUVADA for PrEP:
 You must be HIV-negative before you start taking
TRUVADA for PrEP. You must get tested to make sure that you
do not already have HIV-1. Do not take TRUVADA to reduce the
risk of getting HIV-1 unless you are confirmed to be HIV-negative.
 Many HIV-1 tests can miss HIV-1 infection in a person who
has recently become infected. If you have flu-like symptoms,
you could have recently become infected with HIV-1. Tell your
healthcare provider if you had a flu-like illness within the last
month before starting or at any time while taking TRUVADA for
PrEP. Symptoms of new HIV-1 infection include tiredness, fever,
joint or muscle aches, headache, sore throat, vomiting, diarrhea,
rash, night sweats, and/or enlarged lymph nodes in the neck
or groin.
While taking TRUVADA for PrEP:
 You must continue to use safer sex practices. Just taking
TRUVADA for PrEP may not keep you from getting HIV-1.
 You must stay HIV-negative to keep taking
TRUVADA for PrEP:
 Get tested for HIV-1 at least every 3 months.
 If you think you were exposed to HIV-1, tell your healthcare
provider right away.
 To further help reduce your risk of getting HIV-1:
 Know your HIV status and the HIV status of your partners.
 Get tested for other sexually transmitted infections. Other
infections make it easier for HIV to infect you.
 Get information and support to help reduce risky sexual
behavior, such as having fewer sex partners.
 Do not miss any doses of TRUVADA. Missing doses may
increase your risk of getting HIV-1 infection.
 If you do become HIV-1 positive, you need more medicine
than TRUVADA alone to treat HIV-1. TRUVADA by itself is not
a complete treatment for HIV-1. If you have HIV-1 and take only
TRUVADA, your HIV-1 may become harder to treat over time.
TRUVADA can cause serious side effects:
 Worsening of hepatitis B (HBV) infection. TRUVADA is not
approved to treat HBV. If you have HBV and stop taking
TRUVADA, your HBV may suddenly get worse. Do not stop
taking TRUVADA without first talking to your healthcare provider,
as they will need to monitor your health.
Please see Important Facts about TRUVADA for PrEP including important warnings on the following page.
Who should not take TRUVADA for PrEP?
Do not take TRUVADA for PrEP if you:
 Already have HIV-1 infection or if you do not know your HIV-1
status. If you are HIV-1 positive, you need to take other medicines with
TRUVADA to treat HIV-1. TRUVADA by itself is not a complete treatment
for HIV-1. If you have HIV-1 and take only TRUVADA, your HIV-1 may
become harder to treat over time.
 Also take certain medicines to treat hepatitis B infection.
What are the other possible side effects of TRUVADA for PrEP?
Serious side effects of TRUVADA may also include:
 Kidney problems, including kidney failure. Your healthcare provider
may do blood tests to check your kidneys before and during treatment
with TRUVADA. If you develop kidney problems, your healthcare
provider may tell you to stop taking TRUVADA.
 Too much lactic acid in your blood (lactic acidosis), which is a
serious but rare medical emergency that can lead to death. Tell your
healthcare provider right away if you get these symptoms: weakness
or being more tired than usual, unusual muscle pain, being short of
breath or fast breathing, stomach pain with nausea and vomiting,
cold or blue hands and feet, feel dizzy or lightheaded, or a fast or
abnormal heartbeat.
 Severe liver problems, which in rare cases can lead to death. Tell
your healthcare provider right away if you get these symptoms: skin
or the white part of your eyes turns yellow, dark “tea-colored” urine,
light-colored stools, loss of appetite for several days or longer, nausea,
or stomach-area pain.
 Bone problems, including bone pain, softening, or thinning, which
may lead to fractures. Your healthcare provider may do tests to check
your bones.
Common side effects in people taking TRUVADA for PrEP are stomach-area
(abdomen) pain, headache, and decreased weight. Tell your healthcare
provider if you have any side effects that bother you or do not go away.
What should I tell my healthcare provider before taking
TRUVADA for PrEP?
 All your health problems. Be sure to tell your healthcare
provider if you have or have had any kidney, bone, or liver problems,
including hepatitis.
 If you are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. It is not known if
TRUVADA can harm your unborn baby. If you become pregnant while
taking TRUVADA for PrEP, talk to your healthcare provider to decide if
you should keep taking TRUVADA.
 If you are breastfeeding (nursing) or plan to breastfeed. Do not
breastfeed. If you become HIV-positive, HIV can be passed to the baby
in breast milk.
 All the medicines you take, including prescription and over-the-
counter medicines, vitamins, and herbal supplements. TRUVADA may
interact with other medicines. Keep a list of all your medicines and
show it to your healthcare provider and pharmacist when you get a
new medicine.
 If you take certain other medicines with TRUVADA, your healthcare
provider may need to check you more often or change your dose.
These medicines include certain medicines to treat hepatitis C (HCV)
infection.
You are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs
to the FDA. Visit www.FDA.gov/medwatch, or call 1-800-FDA-1088.

(tru-VAH-dah)
MOST IMPORTANT INFORMATION ABOUT
TRUVADA FOR PrEP
Before starting TRUVADA for PrEP:
• You must be HIV-1 negative. You must get tested to make sure that you
do not already have HIV-1. Do not take TRUVADA for PrEP to reduce the risk of
getting HIV-1 unless you are confirmed to be HIV-1 negative.
• Many HIV-1 tests can miss HIV-1 infection in a person who has recently
become infected. Symptoms of new HIV-1 infection include flu-like
symptoms, tiredness, fever, joint or muscle aches, headache, sore throat,
vomiting, diarrhea, rash, night sweats, and/or enlarged lymph nodes in the
neck or groin. Tell your healthcare provider if you have had a flu-like illness
within the last month before starting TRUVADA for PrEP.
While taking TRUVADA for PrEP:
• You must continue to use safer sex practices. Just taking TRUVADA for
PrEP may not keep you from getting HIV-1.
• You must stay HIV-negative to keep taking TRUVADA for PrEP. Get tested
for HIV-1 at least every 3 months while taking TRUVADA for PrEP. Tell your
healthcare provider right away if you think you were exposed to HIV-1 or have
a flu-like illness while taking TRUVADA for PrEP.
• If you do become HIV-1 positive, you need more medicine than TRUVADA
alone to treat HIV-1. If you have HIV-1 and take only TRUVADA, your HIV-1
may become harder to treat over time.
• See the “How To Further Reduce Your Risk” section for more information.
TRUVADA may cause serious side effects, including:
• Worsening of hepatitis B (HBV) infection. TRUVADA is not approved to treat
HBV. If you have HBV, your HBV may suddenly get worse if you stop taking
TRUVADA. Do not stop taking TRUVADA without first talking to your healthcare
provider, as they will need to check your health regularly for several months.
ABOUT TRUVADA FOR PrEP
TRUVADA for PrEP is a prescription medicine used together with safer sex
practices to help reduce the risk of getting HIV-1 through sex. This use is only for
HIV-negative adults who are at high risk of getting HIV-1.
• To help determine your risk of getting HIV-1, talk openly with your healthcare
provider about your sexual health.
Do NOT take TRUVADA for PrEP if you:
• Already have HIV-1 infection or if you do not know your HIV-1 status.
• Take certain medicines to treat hepatitis B infection.
HOW TO TAKE TRUVADA FOR PrEP
• Take 1 tablet once a day, every day, not just when you think you have been
exposed to HIV-1.
• Do not miss any doses. Missing doses may increase your risk of getting HIV-1
infection.
• Use TRUVADA for PrEP together with condoms and safer sex practices.
• Get tested for HIV-1 at least every 3 months. You must stay HIV-negative to
keep taking TRUVADA for PrEP.
TRUVADA FOR PREP, the TRUVADA FOR PREP Logo, the TRUVADA Blue Pill Design, TRUVADA, GILEAD, and the GILEAD Logo are trademarks
of Gilead Sciences, Inc., or its related companies. All other marks referenced herein are the property of their respective owners.
Version date: April 2017
© 2017 Gilead Sciences, Inc. All rights reserved. TVDC0131 07/17
IMPORTANT FACTS
This is only a brief summary of important information about
taking TRUVADA for PrEPTM (pre-exposure prophylaxis) to help
reduce the risk of getting HIV-1 infection. This does not replace
talking to your healthcare provider about your medicine.
POSSIBLE SIDE EFFECTS OF TRUVADA FOR PrEP
TRUVADA can cause serious side effects, including:
• Those in the “Most Important Information About TRUVADA for PrEP” section.
• New or worse kidney problems, including kidney failure.
• Too much lactic acid in your blood (lactic acidosis), which is a serious but rare
medical emergency that can lead to death. Tell your healthcare provider right away
if you get these symptoms: weakness or being more tired than usual, unusual
muscle pain, being short of breath or fast breathing, stomach pain with nausea
and vomiting, cold or blue hands and feet, feel dizzy or lightheaded, or a fast or
abnormal heartbeat.
• Severe liver problems, which in rare cases can lead to death. Tell your healthcare
provider right away if you get these symptoms: skin or the white part of your eyes
turns yellow, dark “tea-colored” urine, light-colored stools, loss of appetite for
several days or longer, nausea, or stomach-area pain.
• Bone problems.
Common side effects in people taking TRUVADA for PrEP include stomach-area
(abdomen) pain, headache, and decreased weight.
These are not all the possible side effects of TRUVADA. Tell your healthcare provider
right away if you have any new symptoms while taking TRUVADA for PrEP.
Your healthcare provider will need to do tests to monitor your health before
and during treatment with TRUVADA for PrEP.
BEFORE TAKING TRUVADA FOR PrEP
Tell your healthcare provider if you:
• Have or have had any kidney, bone, or liver problems, including hepatitis.
• Have any other medical conditions.
• Are pregnant or plan to become pregnant.
• Are breastfeeding (nursing) or plan to breastfeed. Do not breastfeed. If you become
HIV-positive, HIV can pass to the baby in breast milk.
Tell your healthcare provider about all the medicines you take:
• Keep a list that includes all prescription and over-the-counter medicines, vitamins,
and herbal supplements, and show it to your healthcare provider and pharmacist.
• Ask your healthcare provider or pharmacist about medicines that should not be
taken with TRUVADA for PrEP.
HOW TO FURTHER REDUCE YOUR RISK
• Know your HIV status and the HIV status of your partners.
• Get tested for other sexually transmitted infections. Other infections make it easier
for HIV to infect you.
• Get information and support to help reduce risky sexual behavior, such as having
fewer sex partners.
• Do not share needles or personal items that can have blood or body fluids on them.
GET MORE INFORMATION
• This is only a brief summary of important information about TRUVADA for PrEP.
Talk to your healthcare provider or pharmacist to learn more, including how to
prevent HIV infection.
• Go to start.truvada.com or call 1-800-GILEAD-5
• If you need help paying for your medicine, visit start.truvada.com for program
information.
Plan Your Scans CTs do save lives,
but they can also lead you down
expensive (and scary) rabbit holes.

HEALTH
It’s all r igh t letting
yourself go, as long as you
can get yourself back.
—Mick Jagger

Is This Nearly a third of the

80 million CT scans
The pain woke me up in the middle of the
night. It felt like a strongman twisting a rigid finger deep

Medical Test done each year may be

a waste of time and
into my abdomen. It just wouldn’t quit. By morning it was
still there as a persistent, low-level ache, so I went to see

Overused? cash. Here’s how to tell

if you really need one.
a doctor. She prodded my stomach as I answered a few
questions. With the exam over, we locked eyes and she
BY MICHAEL EASTER said, “You need to go to the hospital for a test right away.”

ILLUSTRATION BY JUAN ESTEBAN RODRIGUEZ MensHealth.com / December 2017 65

 HEALTH

Lying in the computed tomography (CT)

machine, I convinced myself that I had can-
cer. Later a nurse broke the news.
“We got your results,” she said. “You’re
fine.” The pain eventually fizzled out. But it
ALL We’re naturally exposed to about 3.6 millisieverts
of radiation yearly; a one-time dose of 5 mSv is
SYSTEMS linked to cancer. Most CT scans deliver far more.
Here’s the radiation fallout from various tests, and
GLOW the associated cancer risk for a 40-year-old man.

returned months later, after a tough workout.

That’s when it hit me: Both times, I’d done
CrossFit that day. Bingo! I had a muscle strain

2
from doing barbell front squats. (My form can
be shaky with those.) mSv
But here’s the thing: Unlike my mus- ROUTINE HEAD
CT SCAN
cle strain, that CT scan may have lasting 1 in 11,080
effects. More than 80 million CT scans are cancer risk
performed on Americans each year—a four-
fold increase since 1995. 0.4
8
mSv
“CT scans are a keystone of modern medi- DENTAL X-RAYS
mSv
cine,” says David J. Brenner, Ph.D., a radiation (FULL SET)
ROUTINE CHEST
researcher at Columbia University Medical CT SCAN (WITH
CONTRAST)
Center. In minutes, a CT scan can deliver a
16
1 in 1,538
3D image of what’s inside your body, allow- cancer risk mSv
ing for a more accurate diagnosis. “It’s such ROUTINE
a powerful tool there’s a strong temptation ABDOMEN-

22
PELVIS
to use it in too many situations,” says Bren- SCAN (WITH
mSv CONTRAST)
ner. “But these are x-rays, after all, so they do
CORONARY 1 in 942
come with a small risk.” ANGIOGRAM cancer risk
My test delivered a dose of radiation to my 1 in 595
cancer risk
abdomen that was triple the level associated
with cancer risk. At age 30, I now have about
a 1 in 727 lifetime risk of developing cancer 31 mSv
MULTIPHASE
from that scan, according to research in the ABDOMEN-
Archives of Internal Medicine. Those odds are PELVIS SCAN
relatively small, sure. But I’m now slightly 1 in 498
cancer risk
more cancer-prone than I was before, which BEING IN CLOSE
feels like leaving a weight-loss clinic 5 pounds PROXIMITY
TO SOMEONE
heavier. Oh, and my co-pay was $1,500. WHO’S JUST
I believe my scan was unnecessary. “An HAD A NUCLEAR
MEDICINE TEST
estimated 27 million CT scans done last year in 5 mSv
the United States either didn’t need to be done
or could have been replaced by another proce-
dure involving less radiation,” Brenner says. Radiation
FLIGHT FROM exposures
The most common reason for needless can vary
N.Y. TO L.A.
tests, according to a poll of physicians by the .05 mSv “profoundly”
among CT facil-
American Board of Internal Medicine Foun- ities, says
dation, is to avoid malpractice suits, followed Rebecca Smith-
Bindman, M.D.
by simply wanting to be safe. Her research
While you’re in a CT machine, hundreds WATCHING TV found patients
.02 to .03 mSv who’d been
of radioactive x-rays pass through you. For exposed to 100
per year
a routine head scan, you’re hit with 2 milli- times more
radiation than
sieverts (mSv) of radiation; a multiphase necessary. To
T.M. DETWILER (illustration)

abdomen-pelvis scan delivers 31 mSv. In a protect your-

self, she rec-
study of atomic bomb survivors in Japan, BASELINE ommends asking
exposures above 5 mSv raised cancer risk. LIFETIME the technician
CANCER RISK to use “the
A man’s chances of getting the big C from FOR MEN lowest effec-
one CT scan is low—at worst, about 1 in 330 1 in 3 tive dose.”

66 MensHealth.com / December 2017

 FOR WHOLE
MOUTH
HEALTH
REMOVES
24X MORE
BACTERIA*

*with Colgate Total® Advanced Health Mouthwash;

vs. an ordinary, non-antibacterial mouthwash.
©2017 Colgate-Palmolive Company
 HEALTH
FORTIFY
for a 20-year-old receiving a detailed
abdomen-pelvis scan, and 1 in 14,000-
plus for a 60-year-old getting a routine
head scan, according to the Archives of
WITH VITAMIN C* Internal Medicine study. But because
docs order millions of scans a year, the
numbers may add up in the future to
about 29,000 annual cancers—or up
EMERGEN-C to 2 percent of all new cancers, the
IMMUNE+ GUMMIES ARE National Cancer Institute reports.
Many people get multiple scans,
Packed with
which further raises risk. “It’s doubled if
Vitamin C, Zinc, you get two, tripled if you get three, and
and Vitamin D so on,” says Brenner. A third of people
scanned have had five or more previous
scans, Harvard research reveals.
Naturally fruit That’s where the real danger is, says
flavored Frank Cucinotta, Ph.D., of the Univer-
sity of Nevada, Las Vegas, who studies
the biological effects of radiation. The
more body areas hit and the higher the
radiation dose, he says, the higher your
©2017 Alacer. *These statements have not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.
risk. Your abdomen and chest are the
most sensitive, due to the concentra-
tion of organs there and the radiation
levels needed to yield a clear image.
A rare cancer caused by a scan will
take decades to bloom, adds Cucinotta.
That’s why CTs are generally riskier
for young people; the older you are, the
more likely you’ll die of something else
before that cancer appears.
There’s also the question of time,
stress over the pending results, and
the bill you’ll receive afterward, says
Vinay Prasad, M.D., an oncologist at the
Oregon Health & Science University.
There’s no standardized price for a CT
scan, and even with insurance you may
pay a few hundred to thousands out
of pocket. That’s why you should ask
how much the scan will cost you and
whether it can be done somewhere else
for less, Dr. Prasad says.
It’s important to put all these risks
in context. “If you need a CT scan for
a good medical reason, you should
absolutely have it, because the bene-
fits of getting the right diagnosis far
outweigh any small risks,” says Bren-
ner. “But if there isn’t a good medical
reason, you shouldn’t have that scan.”
Consider the following four factors in
NEW making that crucial decision.
1 FIT THE CRITERIA
When ordering such tests,
doctors have guidelines: the
American College of Radiology Appro-
priateness Criteria (https://acsearch.
acr.org/list). That includes a whopping
230 clinical scenarios with 1,100 clini-
cal variants. “Ask why a CT is advised,
and perhaps add, ‘Does my condition
meet ACR guidelines for a CT scan?’”
says Brenner.
2
EXPLORE OTHER OPTIONS
In some cases, other types of
diagnostic tests may render an
adequate image. Ultrasound and MRI
have no radiation, and “x-ray has about
100 to 1,000 times less radiation than
a CT,” says Cucinotta. For recurring
issues like kidney stones, a CT may be
needed initially, when accuracy is key.
“But after that, some other imaging can
usually be used, such as a conventional
x-ray or ultrasound,” Brenner says.
3
KNOW YOUR DOCTOR
My scan wasn’t ordered by my
regular doc, who was away at the
time. My regular doctor knows I exer-
cise, so he may have suspected a muscle
issue and had me wait. “When you know
your doctor, he or she may be better at
recommending or not recommending
a scan,” says Dr. Prasad.
4
BE PATIENT, MAN!
CTs are popular because they’re
quick and easy and make doc-
tors feel they’re being thorough, says Dr.
Prasad. That may be why you’ll likely get
one in an ER or urgent care setting. But
University of Hawaii researchers found
that only 6 percent of CT scans given to
people who went to an ER after fainting
or nearly fainting showed anything
abnormal. The study concluded that
ER patients with dizziness or fainting
may not benefit from a head scan unless
they’re older, have a focal neurological
deficit, or had a recent head injury. The
same may be true for the neck down: “In
young people, a lot of aches and pains
are probably musculoskeletal and go
away in about a week,” says Dr. Prasad.
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*This statement has not been evaluated by the Food and Drug Administration. This product is not intended to diagnose, treat, cure, or prevent any disease.
 HEALTH
SUNDAY MONDAY
Eat, Drink & Be Lean:
A Holiday Strategy
TO AVOID BECOMING THE FAT GUY IN THE RED SUIT LATER THIS MONTH, TURN THESE 31 DAILY TIPS
INTO HABITS AND START THE NEW YEAR AS A NEW MAN. / BY MIKE ZIMMERMAN
3 4
Holiday Party Tip #1 Sweat today
Talk. If words are coming and every
out, food isn’t going in. day. Recent
research links 15 minutes
of moderate exercise—
think brisk walking—to
reduced food craving in
overweight people.
10
Stay hydrated by glugging
11
A handful of mixed nuts
plenty of water: A lower helps fill you up and top
fluid intake inhibits your off your magnesium
ability to manage glucose, levels. Low Mg may
especially in people with be linked to excess
type 2 diabetes, research weight, type 2
suggests. Smart men diabetes, and
don’t mess with glucose. heart disease.
17 18
Holiday Party Tip #3 Yes, it’s a long month, but
A buffet is a courtesy, don’t start skipping meals
not a double- to cut calories. A 2015
dog dare. rodent study from Ohio
State linked meal skipping
to weight gain. Slow,
steady, portion-controlled
eating wins the race.
TUESDAY
5 6
Spread some nut butter
on a slice of whole grain
bread. Extra fiber? Sure,
and a new study from
Tufts praises whole grains
for raising metabolism
and losing more calories
during digestion.
12
Holiday seafood has Pol-
ish, Italian, Slovakian, and
Jewish roots (to name
a few), which means
someone will serve
you a plate of it this
month. Take the
nutritional layup!
19
For baking, add corn bran
to batter. Slow-fermenting
fiber may improve bowel
function and increase
fecal weight. Fat loss?
That’s unclear. But
we’re moved by
these findings.
WEDNESDAY THURSDAY
7
Eat 30 grams of fiber
Protein helps control
appetite, but don’t go today and every day. It
crazy. You want 20 to 30 ain’t just about weight
grams per meal. Have loss and the bathroom
three or four palm-sized bliss. It’s also linked to
portions three or four graceful aging. (We’ll be
times a day, especially expecting a thank-you
to build muscle. note in 10 years or so.)
13
It’s cold-turkey
14
Drink less (or no) diet soda
season, so today. Sounds counter-
stamp out bad intuitive, but a large 2017
food habits review in the Canadian
along with the cigs. Smok- Medical Association Jour-
ers tend to be equally nal suggests a link
dumb about nutrient between diet soda
intake, research shows. and weight gain.
20
Hosting? Have you
21
Here’s yet
bought to-go containers another reason
so you can send your to drink more
guests off with all water: Red Bull
the extra food? and vodka make you piss
like you’re auditioning for
a career in pissing. Arrive
at that party hydrated.
FRIDAY
1
Swap out cream and
sugar for cinnamon in
your coffee, says Amy
Gorin, R.D.N. Tastes like
Christmas, and you won’t
miss the sweeter, cream-
ier version. May help
lower blood sugar too.
8 9
Holiday Party Tip #2
A plate of healthy food
makes you look intelligent
and sophisticated, like a
guy who knows what mat-
ters. Stand next to the guy
gobbling wings and you’ll
look like a genius.
15
Here’s a sleep tip, because
you look like you need it:
How many studies have
found that poor or insuffi-
cient sleep makes you crave
junk food and store more
fat? Just about all of them.
Commit to your full eight.
22
Mix a handful of rinsed
canned white beans into
your smoothies. “They
pick up the flavor of the
other ingredients really
well, and you get a fiber
and protein boost,” says
nutritionist Gorin.
SATURDAY
2
Have oatmeal for break-
fast. Slow-digesting carbs
may trigger your “ileal
brake,” a digestive reac-
tion in your small intestine
that suppresses hunger
pangs between meals.
Upshot: You’ll snack less.
Best cause-effect nutri-
tion advice ever: We
asked a French
waiter what “crois-
sant” meant. He
said, “Eat shit
and die.” We
were like, “Truth!”
16
You’re halfway through
the month. Celebrate
the victories, forget the
defeats, and plug away.
The Patriots have come
from behind to win 40
times under Tom Brady.
Resume your comeback.
23
Holiday Party Tip #4
Using smaller plates and
bowls at meal-
time really
does help
you eat
less. Try it
tonight.
 Food styling: Michelle Gatton/Stockland Martel, prop styling: Wendy Schelah/Halley Resources, RAMI NIEMI (illustrations), MICHAEL BRANDON MYERS (icons)

24
This year, Santa’s stop-
25
Today only:
26
You’re off work. You have
27
On game days, shell
28
Try drinking green tea
29
Reward your-
30
...eat it slowly and mind-
ping at one cookie; the Go wild. new toys. When your own nuts. Men who instead of your usual self with a fully. Research suggests
rest get saved for the Eat hearty. you’re playing with shelled their pistachios coffee today. Some folks food you’ve that eating quickly can
damn elves. Drink deep. them, you’re not ate 41 percent fewer nuts swear it curbs appetite been craving all mean eating way more
And enjoy the eating. Yay! than those who didn’t and helps them lose month long. The than you ever intended to.
slumber of the crack their own, accord- weight. Plus, the caffeine season is about Don’t forget, steam shov-
unencum- ing to a study published and antioxidants will do joy, after all. Just els are for strip mines, not
bered soul. in the journal Appetite. you just fine. remember to... happy hour.

MEMAW SAYS, You can’t disappoint YOUR BOSS Choose a lower-proof YOUR FATIGUED Before ordering
31 HOLIDAY 911 “BUNDT CAKE’S Memaw. Have the cake WANTS TO booze like Fireball SELF CRAVES greasy takeout,
Go back and READY!” but savor that first DO A SHOT. so you don’t end up GARBAGE. fry two eggs in
Food! Booze! bite. The more you tackling the Xmas olive oil. Put ’em
reread this
Parties! Save devour, the less joy tree later. Or con- on a whole wheat
entire list
your waistline and more guilt you’ll vince the chief that English muffin with
before you
with these moves. feel. So have a few good spirits are tomato, red onion,
go out for bites, compliment for sipping. You might cheese, avocado, and
New Year’s. her, and then slip get a nice bourbon sriracha. Eat and
It’s gonna be the rest to the cat. out of the bargain. feel better.
a long night.

11 27 1 10 7 22

28

71
PHOTOGRAPH BY TED CAVANAUGH
FOR AD U LTS WI T H ACT I V E P S O RI ATIC A RTHRITIS (PsA)

ACTUAL
PATIENT
CONSUMER BRIEF SUMMARY
JONI Individual results may vary. Patient compensated for her time.

The risk information provided here is not comprehensive. This information
does not take the place of talking with your doctor about your medical
condition or treatment.
To learn more about COSENTYX® (secukinumab), talk to your doctor
or pharmacist. For more information and to obtain the FDA-approved
product labeling, call 1-888-669-6682 or visit www.COSENTYX.com/PsA.
What is the most important information I should know about
COSENTYX?
COSENTYX is a medicine that affects your immune system. COSENTYX
may increase your risk of having serious side effects such as:
Infections. COSENTYX may lower the ability of your immune system to
fight infections and may increase your risk of infections.
• Your healthcare provider should check you for tuberculosis (TB) before
starting treatment with COSENTYX.
• If your healthcare provider feels that you are at risk for TB, you may
be treated with medicine for TB before you begin treatment with
COSENTYX and during treatment with COSENTYX.
• Your healthcare provider should watch you closely for signs and
symptoms of TB during treatment with COSENTYX. Do not take
COSENTYX if you have an active TB infection.
Before starting COSENTYX, tell your healthcare provider if you:
• are being treated for an infection
• have an infection that does not go away or that keeps coming back
• have TB or have been in close contact with someone with TB
• think you have an infection or have symptoms of an infection
such as: fevers, sweats, or chills; muscle aches; cough; shortness of
breath; blood in your phlegm; weight loss; warm, red, or painful skin or
sores on your body; diarrhea or stomach pain; burning when you urinate
or urinate more often than normal.
After starting COSENTYX, call your healthcare provider right away
if you have any of the signs of infection listed above. Do not use
COSENTYX if you have any signs of infection unless you are instructed to by
your healthcare provider.
See “What are the possible side effects of COSENTYX?” for more
information about side effects.
What is COSENTYX?
COSENTYX is a prescription medicine used to treat adults with active
psoriatic arthritis.
COSENTYX may improve your psoriatic arthritis, but it may also lower the
ability of your immune system to fight infections.
It is not known if COSENTYX is safe and effective in children.
Who should not use COSENTYX?
Do not use COSENTYX if you have had a severe allergic reaction to
secukinumab or any of the other ingredients in COSENTYX. See the end
of the Consumer Brief Summary for a complete list of ingredients in
COSENTYX.
What should I tell my healthcare provider before starting COSENTYX?
Before starting COSENTYX, tell your healthcare provider if you:
• have any of the conditions or symptoms listed in the section “What is
the most important information I should know about COSENTYX?”
• have inflammatory bowel disease (Crohn’s disease or ulcerative colitis)
• are allergic to latex. The needle cap on the COSENTYX Sensoready® pen
and prefilled syringe contains latex.
• have recently received or are scheduled to receive an immunization
(vaccine). People who take COSENTYX should not receive live vaccines.
• have any other medical conditions
• are pregnant or plan to become pregnant. It is not known if COSENTYX
can harm your unborn baby. You and your healthcare provider should
decide if you will use COSENTYX.
• are breastfeeding or plan to breastfeed. It is not known if COSENTYX
passes into your breast milk.
Tell your healthcare provider about all the medicines you take, including
prescription and over-the-counter medicines, vitamins, and herbal
supplements.
Know the medicines you take. Keep a list of your medicines to show your
healthcare provider and pharmacist when you get a new medicine.
 WATCH
MEGET INTO MY
GROOVE.
How should I use COSENTYX?
See the detailed “Instructions for Use” that comes with your
COSENTYX for information on how to prepare and inject a dose
of COSENTYX, and how to properly throw away (dispose of) used
COSENTYX Sensoready pens and prefilled syringes.
• Use COSENTYX exactly as prescribed by your healthcare provider.
• If your healthcare provider decides that you or a caregiver may give
your injections of COSENTYX at home, you should receive training on
the right way to prepare and inject COSENTYX. Do not try to inject
COSENTYX yourself, until you or your caregiver has been shown how to
inject COSENTYX by your healthcare provider.
• COSENTYX comes in a Sensoready pen or prefilled syringe that you
or your caregiver may use at home to give injections. Your healthcare
provider will decide which type of COSENTYX is best for you to use
at home.
• Your healthcare provider will prescribe the dose of COSENTYX that is
right for you.
• If you inject more COSENTYX than prescribed, call your healthcare
provider or go to the nearest emergency room right away.
What are the possible side effects of COSENTYX?
See “What is the most important information I should know about
COSENTYX?”
• Inflammatory bowel disease. New cases of inflammatory bowel
disease or “flare-ups” can happen with COSENTYX, and can sometimes
be serious. If you have inflammatory bowel disease (ulcerative colitis
or Crohn’s disease), tell your healthcare provider if you have worsening
disease symptoms during treatment with COSENTYX or develop new
symptoms of stomach pain or diarrhea.
• Serious allergic reactions. Get emergency medical help right away
if you get any of the following symptoms of a serious allergic reaction:
feel faint; swelling of your face, eyelids, lips, mouth, tongue, or throat;
trouble breathing or throat tightness; chest tightness; or skin rash.
Novartis Pharmaceuticals Corporation
East Hanover, New Jersey 07936-1080 © 2017 Novartis
TALK TO YOUR RHEUMATOLOGIST ABOUT COSENTYX ® —
THE FIRST & ONLY BIOLOGIC TO TARGET IL-17A FOR
PSORIATIC ARTHRITIS.
If you have a severe allergic reaction, do not give another injection
of COSENTYX.
The most common side effects of COSENTYX include: cold symptoms,
diarrhea, and upper respiratory infections.
These are not all of the possible side effects of COSENTYX.
Call your doctor for medical advice about side effects. You may report side
effects to FDA at 1-800-FDA-1088.
Keep COSENTYX and all medicines out of the reach of children.
General information about the safe and effective use of COSENTYX
Medicines are sometimes prescribed for purposes other than those listed in
a Medication Guide. Do not use COSENTYX for a condition for which it was
not prescribed. Do not give COSENTYX to other people, even if they have
the same symptoms you have. It may harm them.
You can ask your healthcare provider or pharmacist for information about
COSENTYX that is written for health professionals.
What are the ingredients in COSENTYX?
Active ingredient: secukinumab
Inactive ingredients: Sensoready pen and prefilled syringe: L-histidine/
histidine hydrochloride monohydrate, L-methionine, polysorbate 80,
trehalose dihydrate, and sterile water for injection.
Vial: L-histidine/histidine hydrochloride monohydrate, polysorbate 80,
and sucrose.
The recommended dose is 150 mg, but if you also have moderate
to severe psoriasis or continue to have PsA symptoms after you start,
your doctor may prescribe 300 mg (taken as two 150-mg injections).
*
$
O CO-PAY COSENTYX.COM/PSA
1-844-COSENTYX
IF YOU’RE ELIGIBLE (1-844-267-3689)
*Limitations apply. Commercial insurance only.
7/17 COS-1345810
 HEALTH

T H E
H E A LT H
NEW RESEARCH BULLETINS FROM AROUND THE WORLD.
R E P O R T

1
BE CALM AND TAT ON 4 BREAKING BAD HABITS

People who exceeded three straight hours

Two 2017 studies have raised new concerns
watching a TV series were nearly twice as
about tattooing. One found the sweat rate likely to have trouble falling or staying asleep
of inked skin to be half that of bare skin, as non-bingers. Such viewing can leave
you mulling the plot, says researcher Jan
potentially compromising body cooling and
Van den Bulck, Ph.D. Mix up what you watch.
your workout. The other discovered ink
Fig. 4
particles that had migrated to lymph nodes,
which play a key role in immunity. Both

CRACK!
Fig. 1
studies were small, however, and may have 5 6
been overhyped. (The first one had just 10
guys, and the second used four tattooed LOTION The two most dan-
cadavers.) Bottom line? Think twice before
DEMOTION gerous positions for
covering wide swaths of your body with sex are man-on-top
tattoos. But as for getting a small I-love- Suffering from and doggy style.
dry, scaly winter
Mom heart on your arm, you’re still clear. skin? A JAMA Der-
A recent Brazilian
matology analysis study of ER admis-
of 174 lotions
and moisturizers
sions found that Fig. 5

2 RETHINK DAILY ASPIRIN found that nearly your penis is at the

all of those prod-
ucts claiming to
greatest risk for
To prevent heart that people who’d be “dermatologist fracture during
attack and stroke, never had a heart recommended,”
vigorous thrusting,
doctors often sug- attack received no “hypoallergenic,”
gest taking a daily benefit from daily “natural,” “fra- when you’re more
grance free,” or
low-dose aspirin aspirin. Regular “organic” con-
likely to exit your
(81 milligrams). But aspirin use can tained at least partner and miss
Fig. 2 not everyone may raise your risk of one potential
benefit, according stomach, intestine, allergen, includ-
the target during
to a 2017 study in and brain bleeding. ing fragrances. reinsertion. (The
the journal Clinical If you’re currently What’s more, these
tissues that expand
Cardiology. After popping one, ask lotions were
three years of track- your doctor if it’s a selling at up to for an erection can
a 9,400 percent
ing people 45 and good idea to con- premium. Save
actually rupture Fig. 6
older with cardio- tinue, says study money by using under the extra pres-
vascular disease, coauthor Anthony shea butter. Or,
researchers found Bavry, M.D. if you have eczema
sure.) So try to be
or psoriasis, ask mindful, wild man.
a dermatologist
to recommend an
If you hear a snap,
Experts continue to
alternative, says says Rodrigo Barros,
study coauthor
3 debate the efficacy M.D., hit the ER.
Jonathan Silver-
of the prostate spe-
berg, Ph.D. Immediately.
PSA ISN’T cific antigen test
DOA YET
(PSA), a blood screen
for cancer. In 2012,
a task force deemed
its odds of prevent-
ing deaths from the disease at slim to
7
BEAT HOLIDAY BLUES
zero. But in a new analysis of the same
Fig. 3 data, the PSA was found to reduce the Accepting a bad mood instead of deeming Fig. 7
risk of prostate cancer death by 25 to 32
percent over an 11-year period (versus
it inappropriate caused less depression and
no screening). What’s your move? Dis- anxiety and more life satisfaction, in a new
cuss the pros and cons with your doctor.
“It’s not a one-size-fits-all test,”
study. The more you beat yourself up about
COMPILED BY
says researcher Ruth Etzioni, Ph.D. being down, the longer the feeling lingers. MICAELA YOUNG

74 MensHealth.com / December 2017 ILLUSTRATIONS BY ZOHAR LAZAR

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 HEALTH

Your Opioid
When you suspect that a loved one has an opioid
addiction involving a drug such as OxyContin,
SPECIAL Vicodin, fentanyl, heroin, or some combination,

First-Aid Kit
DRUG OVERDOSES ARE THE NUMBER ONE KILLER
OF AMERICANS UNDER AGE 50. NEARLY TWO
OUT OF THREE VICTIMS ARE MEN. LEARN HOW
TO SAVE THEM. / BY MAIA SZALAVITZ,
CINDY KUZMA, AND JENNIFER MESSIMER
REP ORT it can be hard to think rationally. You’re fright-
ened, furious, or both. You may feel betrayed.
If the person suffers from chronic pain, it may
be unclear what role the drugs play in the problem. To make matters
worse, you face a welter of conflicting “expert” advice. Fortunately,
there’s now a strong scientific body of knowledge on ways to help peo-
ple who are either addicted or on the brink. Here’s what to do.

1 2 3
ASSESS TAME PAIN
FORGET GET THE
THE WITHOUT ABOUT RIGHT MEDS
SITUATION OPIOIDS TOUGH LOVE RIGHT AWAY
Daily opioid use by someone in If you need to act, cooperation is Methadone or buprenorphine as
chronic pain may not necessarily key. Those tough-love interven- a medication-assisted treatment
mean addiction. (Requiring med- tions where people are shamed option seems counter intuitive
ication to function is common in into treatment are “extremely and is often stigmatized. But
Combine OTC
chronic conditions like diabetes Drugs Carefully traumatic and often destroy rela- it’s the only approach that cuts
and asthma.) A more telling sign Ibuprofen, aspi- tionships,” says Patt Denning, the risk of death by 50 percent or
rin, or naproxen
is drug use that continues despite can be taken with Ph.D., director of clinical services more, says Dr. Wakeman. Both
negative consequences. If some- acetaminophen at the Center for Harm Reduc- meds are superior to abstinence
(Tylenol). A Uni-
one is skipping work, always versity of Pitts- tion Therapy in San Francisco. for preventing relapse; and if
needs money, or becomes secre- burgh study found Families can be devastated when relapse occurs, they lower the
an acetaminophen/
tive about his or her activities, ibuprofen pairing the outcome is overdose and not risk of overdose death. The drugs
then you should worry. “Focus to be more effec- recovery. Instead, try Commu- also reduce the risk of acquiring
tive than opioids
first on building trust and try- for dental pain nity Reinforcement and Family and transmitting hepatitis and
ing to understand what’s going relief. Just stick Training (CRAFT). In one study, HIV. “It gives the person their
to the label’s
on,” says Sarah Wakeman, M.D., recommended daily it was more than twice as effective life back immediately,” Denning
of the Substance Use Disorders dosage for each. as traditional 12-step interven- says. “They can have minimal
Initiative at Massachusetts Gen- tions. It helps family members cravings and be mentally clear to
eral Hospital. “Slowing down to engage the person, without being make choices.” (Vivitrol is a new-
think through your loved one’s confrontational, to encourage er non-opioid option that blocks
situation can prevent stress and them to consider treatment. Ask opioid receptors in the brain.
Prop styling: Wendy Schelah/Halley Resources, BROWN BIRD DESIGN (illustrations)
conflict,” adds Carrie Wilkens, your therapist if he or she does But because it resets tolerance to
Try Taking
Ph.D., clinical director of New CRAFT or “harm reduction” opioids, a person taking it has an
a Different Pill
York’s Center for Motivation and Acetaminophen and therapy. (Find a guide to CRAFT increased risk of accidental over-
ibuprofen come
Change. Consider your options in prescription
at motivationandchange.com.) dose after it’s stopped.)
carefully; most treatment facili- strengths too.
If opioids are a
ties aren’t federally regulated. At must, ask about
the state level, there’s no single
WHAT IS FENTANYL, ANYWAY?
all options as
well as the risks
oversight authority, standards of abuse, misuse,
vary between states, and some and addiction; An opioid other drugs people take
you’re less likely that’s 50 (such as Oxy- Oxy or heroin
programs are exempt from state to become depen- times more Contin) with and don’t know
regulation. Visit samhsa.gov/ dent on tapen- potent than or without it’s laced
tadol (Nucynta) heroin, fen- the buyer’s with fen-
find-help to find a local provider, than oxycodone tanyl can knowledge tanyl, they
but be aware that while the gov- or hydrocodone, be mixed to boost risk using
according to a into heroin, the drug’s enough to stop
ernment keeps the list, it doesn’t British Journal cocaine, and effect. When breathing.
vet the programs. of Pain review.

76 MensHealth.com / December 2017 PHOTOGRAPHS BY TED CAVANAUGH

DRUG
OVERDOSE
FATALITIES
IN THE U.S.
IN 2016 64,000 58,220 TOTAL U.S.
CASUALTIES
IN VIETNAM
CONFLICT,
1954–1975

ON ANY GIVEN THIS IS A

DAY IN MALE HEALTH
AMERICA . . . CRISIS

3,900
TOTAL U.S. DRUG
OVERDOSE DEATHS
IN 2015

PEOPLE USE PRESCRIPTION OPIOIDS

FOR NONMEDICAL REASONS
52,404

580
PEOPLE START USING HEROIN

32,957
91
PEOPLE DIE FROM AN OPIOID-
RELATED OVERDOSE
WERE MEN

TOTAL U.S. OPIOID-RELATED

DEATHS IN 2015

YEAR-OVER-YEAR
GROWTH IN U.S. OPIOID-
33,091
RELATED DEATHS

80%

60 ALL
HEROIN OPIOIDS
40

20
SYNTHETICS

21,671
0 (INCLUDING
F E N TA N Y L)
-20

2011 2012 2013 2014 2015

WERE MEN

CDC, U.S. NATIONAL ARCHIVES & RECORDS ADMINISTRATION, SAMHSA, NIDA, NATIONAL CENTER FOR HEALTH STATISTICS 77
 5
SAVE THE
FANCY REHAB
FOR CELEBS
Media stories of celebrity rehab
may lead you to believe that a
month in a posh treatment pro-
gram is the best way to treat a
drug addiction. It’s not. “Science
has never shown that 28-day pro-
grams are effective for opioid use
disorders,” says Dr. Wakeman.
Addiction tends to be chronic, so
a short burst of treatment in an

4
FIND OUT are often found at universities.)
TAME PAIN
artificial situation isn’t likely to
WHAT ELSE IS Many drug-dependent people
WITHOUT
help. (That said, if someone is in a
GOING ON also have a mental health disor- OPIOIDS drug den, get them to a safe place.)
der, such as depression, anxiety,

6
Once someone agrees to get help, or untreated childhood ADHD, ACCEPT
encourage him or her to start with and many adult opioid users have OCCASIONAL
an addiction evaluation by a med- experienced PTSD or childhood RELAPSE
ical professional who has no affil- trauma. If the drug problem is
Intercept
iation to any drug program. This driven by psychiatric symptoms, the Message No one expects a dieter to never
ensures a more objective evalua- those need to be treated along Pain sensations cheat. But overcoming addiction
travel from an
tion and treatment. (Such experts with the dependency itself. injury site to the requires new behaviors and often
brain via nerves, a complete lifestyle overhaul, so
and doctors have
new methods of failure to change completely and
BEWARE OF FRIENDS WHO MEAN WELL
jamming these immediately is often viewed as
signals, says
Asokumar Buvanen- failure to change at all. Seeing
OPIOID USER’S FRIEND/RELATIVE’S dran, M.D., an relapse as a return to square one
SOURCE SOURCE anesthesiologist
with Rush Uni- is counterproductive. “It’s harm-
1.9% 5.3% 54.2% 81.6% 2.2% versity Medical ful because it robs the person of
Center: 1) using
1.9% nerve blocks, all the gains they’ve made,” says
like injections Denning. “If someone has gone
3.9% of anesthetics
3.1% or steroids; from using daily to once every
2) implanting three months, that’s progress
16.6% 5.5% electrodes that
deliver electri- that should be celebrated.”
18.1% 5.7% cal pulses to the
spine; 3) singe-
ing nerve tissue
with heat (called
FREE FROM BOUGHT/ ONE MORE DRUG OTHER radiofrequency
FRIEND/ TOOK FROM DOCTOR THAN ONE DEALER/ ablation); and 4) A CRISIS
RELATIVE FRIEND/
RELATIVE
DOCTOR STRANGER implanting pumps 100 YEARS
IN THE
that deliver med-
SAMHSA ications directly
to the spine. MAKING

78 MensHealth.com / December 2017

LOCK UP YOUR DRUGSTORE
While you’ve warned your kids
about prescription drugs, it’s still a
smart idea to prevent their friends
(or an Airbnb guest) from raiding
pills while you’re away. A small
safe is best, but it’s inconvenient.
7 8
BUILD A
SOCIAL
STRUCTURE
The people most likely to over-
come addiction have a mean-
ingful social structure ( job,
school) and a strong network
of friends and family members
who make them feel loved and
needed. Unfortunately, the U.S.
treatment system has focused
on a single way to generate social
support: 12-step programs like
Alcoholics or Narcotics Anony-
mous, where people meet to con-
fess their “character defects” and
turn their lives over to a Higher
Power. Since these meetings are
free and widely available, it’s
worthwhile to try a few to see if
they help. But these groups are
not the only or even the best way
to get support. “Using drugs and
recovering from their effects
takes up a lot of space in a person’s
life. When you stop, that empty
space can be overwhelming,”
says Wilkens. “Having social
support helps fill that space with
healthy alternatives.” Anything
from kickboxing to choir will
do, as long as it’s enjoyable and
engaging. Generally, social activ-
ities are better than solitary ones,
and exercise is especially helpful
because it lifts mood.
1916 Oxycodone is
synthesized from
thebaine; a year later,
it’s used clinically
for the first time.
HOW TO TALK
TO YOUR
Instead, you can make a wood
cabinet or drawer more secure. The
push the door closed, and punch
in the code to lock. While 80
KIDS ABOUT
two-piece StealthLock is controlled pounds of resistance won’t stop OPIOIDS
by a small wireless keypad, and its someone with a pry bar, it will keep Four conversa-
receiver latch mounts easily. Punch your kids’ friends honest. $150,
a code to open, take your meds, amazon.com —SAL VAGLICA
tion tips from
Jeff Foote, Ph.D.,
cofounder of the
Center for Motiva-
tion and Change.
TAME PAIN
NEVER LET
WITHOUT ANYONE
OPIOIDS SLEEP IT OFF
Because relapse can be part of
recovery—and counterfeit street
opioids often contain potent fen-
tanyl and similar analogs—it’s
Weed it out crucial to know how to recognize Have a Chat,
In a recent survey and respond to an overdose. Nal- Not a Lecture
of patients who Don’t say, “We need
replaced opioid- oxone (Narcan) is an antidote
based pain therapy to have a discussion.”
that rapidly reverses the effects Instead, ask, “Is it
with cannabis to
treat conditions of opioids. It’s harmless and can’t okay if we talk about
like arthritis be misused, even when treat- this?” Asking permis-
and fibromyalgia, sion starts a dialogue.
71 percent said it ing unconsciousness that turns
was just as effec- out to be unrelated to an over-
tive as opioids Go Beyond
at managing their dose. Anyone who’s dealing with Scare Tactics
pain. Other stud- addiction—their own or a loved Detail the dangers
ies found that (overdose, death)
migraine fre- one’s—should have it nearby. Nal- but also touch on the
quency fell with oxone can be obtained without a reasons why people
marijuana use, take drugs recreation-
and that oil cap- prescription in most states from
sules contain- ally. Don’t ignore
pharmacies, hospitals, and nee- that side. Talk about it.
ing THC, or oral
sprays contain- dle exchange programs. It comes
ing both THC and as an injection or nasal spray. For Invite Dissent
CBD (the active It’s normal for kids to
compounds in mar- more information, visit the web-
ijuana), eased push back, so ask if
site getnaloxonenow.org. they agree with your
chronic cancer
pain. Official A n opioid overdose kills view or if you’re over-
guidelines don’t by stopping breathing. Signs looking anything.
endorse smoking “You want them to dis-
marijuana for any include unconsciousness, blue cuss it as openly as
condition, and lips or extremities, and a weird possible,” says Foote.
it remains illegal
in many states; gurgling or snoring-like sound.
but in states Never let someone you suspect Follow Up
where it’s legal, Reward participation
opioid-related of overdosing “sleep it off.” They with positive rein-
overdose deaths may never wake up. Try to arouse forcement. Thank
have decreased. them for being recep-
them. If you can’t, use naloxone,
tive. And don’t make
S O U R C E S: G I N A R YA N , P harm . D., call 911, and do rescue breathing it a onetime thing.
ASOKUMAR BUVANENDR AN,
S T E V E N S TA N O S , D . O .
M . D., if needed until help arrives. Check in periodically.
1920 Congress first 1980 The risk of 1996 Prescribing 2017 President
recognizes the hazard addiction to opioids rates for opioids soar Trump approves $500
posed by unregulated is negligible, a New after “pain” is added million for opioid
heroin, morphine, and England Journal of Med- as a fifth vital sign in treatment, recovery,
other opiates. icine study concludes. clinical assessments. and prevention.
 THE ADVENTURIST One impossible challenge. Five days to train. Go.

The Best Way

to Flip Out
THINK YOU HAVE THE FORTITUDE TO TACKLE
A MASSIVE SKI JUMP? / BY CLINT CARTER

When the rep at Utah Olympic Park

told me I wouldn’t be allowed beyond the 10.5-foot sin-
gle ramp, I was a little burned. I came here to learn and
execute a backflip in five days, and even though I’m a
rank amateur who’s never caught air before (at least not
intentionally), I had my eyes on the Mongo, the 22-foot
triple ramp that can launch a skier 50 feet into the sky.
It sounded like fun. Besides, the UOP and U.S. Ski &
Snowboard not only gave me access to their million-
gallon training pool (where I’ll be landing) but also

80 MensHealth.com / December 2017

PHOTOGRAPHS BY CODY PICKENS
 THE ADVENTURIST

ELEVATE YOURSELF Data from a Fitbit Ionic

4,500
4,000 DAY 1
CALORIES

DAY 5
3,500
3,000 DAY 2 DAY 4
DAY 3
2,500
65 60 55 50 45 40 35 30
FLOORS

Steps? Meh. Stories (floors) climbed capture real effort.

assigned me an aerials goddess for a coach: Ashley Cald-

well, the current women’s freestyle world champion.
But as I look down at the kiddie ramp (a.k.a. the Mini)
for my first training jump, my burn gives way to relief.
Even the 3-foot jump turns my courage to pudding, so I
imagine the Mongo could leave me coughing up my own
testicles. Air jets at the bottom of the pool create bubbles
that break the water’s surface tension, but impact can
still sting plenty. The single ramp I’m building toward
will shoot me off at nearly 25 mph, and even a good land-
ing—skis down, smacking the water like a flat-bottom
boat—could send a painful shock through my spine. A
bad landing could end in a concussion. Even the best-case
scenario isn’t great: The pool is unheated and the air tem-
perature here is 50 degrees. I might be forced to piss in my

F
wetsuit just to stay warm.

Fortunately, I’ve had highline

training in Fort Collins, Colo-
rado (see “Take Up the Slack,”
November). That experience,
in addition to improving my
balance, taught me how to deal
with high-pressure situations by
taking deep breaths and visual-
izing success (not pants-pissing). So I fill my lungs with
air, steady my wobbly legs, and launch myself down the
runway. I build speed until the descent flattens out, and
as the ramp turns upward, I can feel myself sail out over ming into the water. To fall asleep at the end of day two, I
2 3
the water. I celebrate by debuting my first trick: air gui- put a pillow under my hips to relieve some lumbar pain,
1
tar. It’s worth exactly zero points in competition, but it and the following day I shadow Ashley for much-needed
4
ranks high in landability. recovery work (see the opposite page).
The jumps set a productive tone for my first couple of Once I feel stronger, Ashley green-lights me for the
days of training, which focus on adding speed, timing the 1. (and previous) 10.5-foot single. “You’re going to have to go faster and hit
The author, his double
jumps, and bouncing on a trampoline to learn how to con- backflip, and the view the ramp harder,” she says. Caution could really hurt. Her
trol my body while I’m in the air. I fly down the ramp 29 from the ramp. 2. Flips final advice: “Just ski confidently!”
times and take a few face flops and back flops. I’ve been and rotations in the I scrape my psyche for what courage I can find and try
gym are essential to
given a new Fitbit Ionic to play with, and its data reveals success in midair. to take her advice, but it’s funny how fear slows you down.
that after repeatedly ascending to the top of the ramp, I’ve 3. Wet landing: the On my first run on the single ramp, I leave the ramp at a
climbed 105 flights in two days. Spence Eccles Olym- snail’s pace and topple like a dead body into the water.
pic Freestyle Pool.
The collateral damage? Pain in my neck and back, 4. Ashley Caldwell Ashley has a tip: “When I’m scared, I dance.” Oddly,
both of which are stiff and achy after repeatedly slam- shows Clint the ropes. that’s the same thing the highliners in Colorado told me
 STAY IN
THE GAME
Active recovery is
key to bouncing back
after an intense train-
ing session. Tschana
Schiller of U.S. Ski &
Snowboard has the
right plan for you.

Pump the Pedals

10 TO 15 MINUTES
Light to medium
aerobic activity—like
a short bike ride or
casual jump-roping—
increases muscle
temp and gives you
more mobility for
the second and third
parts of your recov-
ery. “You want to go
easy but still break
a sweat,” Schiller says.

Hit the Foam

10 MINUTES
Foam-rolling tired
muscles can help
with soreness and
restore power faster.
“Spend at least a min-
ute on each muscle
group, a bit more
on sensitive spots,”
Schiller says. Hurts
too bad? Use a roller
made of softer foam.
Later you can gradu-
ate to harder rollers.

to do when I was nervous. So I do a jig in my wetsuit and
ski boots, and with my second run at the single, I find my
momentum. On the third, I land a backflip. I pump my
fist and shout a string of celebratory expletives. Then, as
I swim to the edge of the pool, I stop to look back at the
ramps. Teams from other nations regularly travel to the
UOP for training, and one of the Australian aerialists
MICHAEL BRANDON MYERS (icons)
I ask Ashley for help with a double backflip, the logical
next step. The extra spinning will require me to keep my
knees tucked longer, she says. Sticking the landing will be
Go Deep
harder. So she puts me back on the trampoline, straps me 10 MINUTES
into a bungee harness system, and has me spinning back- Dynamic stretches,
flips until I’m landing not only doubles but triples too. like downward dog,
pigeon pose, and
On the final day, the ramp is covered in snow. Before yoga lunges, will help

is just coming off the triple ramp. He sails in a graceful I can jump, I have to go down on my ass, scraping it clean loosen stiff ligaments
arc over my head, flipping thrice and spinning too many with the edge of my ski. (Ironically, snow can slow you and muscles. Work
your entire body, but
times to count before landing cleanly in the water. Then down on the ramps.) Finally, when I’m in the air for my spend extra time on
he swims to the edge and starts back up the stairs for third jump, I can hear her yelling: “Pull! Pull! Pull!” It’s the joints and muscles
another jump. No celebrations. No expletives. Just solid. a reminder to keep my legs in tight so I spin fast enough that are most sore,
as well as the muscle
It dawns on me that while I am busy training for a trick, to make it around twice. Then she yells, “Out!” And I groups you use most
the real athletes are training to become the best there is. straighten up just in time to land cleanly in the water. in your sport.

MensHealth.com / December 2017 83


Glad for a few hours off from shooting Aquaman,
Jason Momoa is shirtless and polishing off a bowl of chicken
and peanut butter. A superhero physique requires that
he ration his carbs to even enjoy Guinness. But as he’s quick
to tell you, being Aquaman has its perks too.
The meal over, the Hawaii-born actor, 38, stands beneath
a custom-built indoor rock climbing wall that plays an
integral role in his workout routine. In short order, he’s
excitedly leading a tour of a man cave that has become an
important refuge during his six months of filming here on
Australia’s Gold Coast. Between filming commitments,
this cavernous space offers the extensive gym and weight
training machines Momoa needs in order to maintain his
muscular, 230-odd-pound frame.
Of even greater interest to Momoa than lifting heavy
objects, though, are the musical instruments set up in
a far corner of the space. “Look at this thing, man!” he
says, strapping on a Fender bass. “This thing is so fuckin’
badass!” He plugs in, flicks on an amplifier, and gives a
groovy demonstration of his new creative outlet. Using his
thumb and fingers against four strings, Momoa plays in a
pop-and-slap style that’d sound at home on a vintage Red
Hot Chili Peppers record. “There’s a bunch of stuff I want
to learn. Instead of waiting around on set all day, I’d rather
be learning something cool.”
The photographer approaches for a few candid shots,
and Momoa rolls his eyes. “We’ll do it later,” Momoa says to
Styling: Steven Constancio, hair and makeup: Jennifer Stanfield
him. “Let me get a shirt on.” To me, he says, “That’s all they
want—me with my shirt off!” He laughs, plays a few more
notes, gets lost in the music, and then reconsiders. “Ah,
fuck it. You can take one. Momoa continues with the funky
technique and then switches to a more intricate piece. “I
just started learning this,” he says, eyes on the fretboard. “I
just can’t sit still, man. There’s too much shit I want to do.”
Momoa’s interest in the bass arose because his costar,
Patrick Wilson, who plays Aquaman’s half brother, Ocean
Master, is “awesome on the drums.” Momoa wanted to
play along. He’d already picked up slide guitar on the set of
the sci-fi series Stargate Atlantis, in which he appeared in
REASONS TO BEING A MAN
78 episodes between 2005 and 2009. The actor has come
a long way since then—in his musical ability as well as in
his acting career and cultural footprint. He sets the bass
aside and picks up another instrument near the drum kit.
“This is my Aquaman guitar, dude,” he says. “I saved a lot
of money so I could get this thing.”
Momoa cradles it, a beauty modeled on the battle-worn
1959 Gibson Les Paul played by Led Zeppelin’s Jimmy
Page. “There’s only a hundred of these in the world. I have
number nine,” he says, admiring the gift he gave himself
for earning the role in Aquaman, a film reportedly bud-
geted at $160 million and scheduled for release at the end
of 2018. Before then, he’ll appear in fellow DC film Jus-
tice League, due out in November. With a hearty laugh, he
says, “I told my wife: one woman, lots of toys!”
Momoa’s wife, the actress Lisa Bonet, and their two
kids, ages 8 and 10, recently returned home to California
after two and a half months on the Gold Coast. (The kids
were going back at school.) “I really can’t tell you what the
This Aquaman
soundstage in
Australia is
a well-equipped
playground
for wall climb-
ing, stick
fighting, and
occasionally
a little acting.
MensHealth.com / December 2017 87
REASONS TO BEING A MAN

HOW MOMOA GOT STRONGER brother—was the main male figure in his life. “He was kind
of like my dad growing up, because my dad was in Hawaii,”
he says. “Craig was an all-around amazing man. He took
care of his family, he was kind, he was strong, he was really
funny. He was definitely the man I looked up to.”
To build pecs DIRECTIONS: START YOUR NEXT CHEST WORKOUT BY
worthy of the King PERFORMING THESE THREE EXERCISES AS A CIRCUIT. REST
AS NEEDED BETWEEN ROUNDS. COMPLETE 5 ROUNDS.
of Atlantis, Momoa THOUGH HE’S MOSTLY KNOWN FOR HIS
gave a call to his roles in front of the camera—notably as the fearsome
old friend and Incline Bench Press
trainer Mark Twight, Select a weight that’s about 70 Dothraki warlord Khal Drogo in the first season of HBO’s
the mountaineer percent of your 1-rep max. Don’t Game of Thrones—Momoa hungers to tell his own stories
who founded Gym know your 1-rep max? Aim for a
weight that will challenge you for too. One of his many ideas includes gathering some of his
Jones and also
transformed the about 10 reps. Do 6 reps , focus- best friends and fellow fathers “and just talking about
actor Henry Cavill ing on maintaining good form. being a good dad,” he says. “Sometimes you don’t learn it
into Superman. from your parents. You learn it from your best friends,”
Twight was well Standing Dumbbell Press
aware of Momoa’s Stand with your feet shoulder- he says. “Instead of just, ‘This is what a man’s supposed
affinity for rock width apart, holding dumbbells to be’ and all the bullshit stuff out there, you can make
climbing, so he lev- at your shoulders. Tighten your
core and press the dumbbells something really positive. The truth is we’re all searching.
eraged that knowl-
edge to come up overhead. Lower them. Use a We’re all looking for guidance, for mentors, and I’m by no
with a master plan: weight heavy enough to make means someone to follow.”
Go hard, starting his the eighth rep hard. Do 12 reps.
This is one of the aspects of being famous that freaks
chest and shoulder
workouts with brutal Pushup Momoa out: When strangers stop him to tell him they look
supersets like the Pushups may seem like they’re up to him, he finds himself cringing. “I’m a degenerate
one at right. Then easy, but not as a finisher to this
too, you know?” he says. “I have my ups and my downs
Momoa could still superset. Do 24 reps, keeping
hit the climbing wall your core tight as you lift your like anyone. All I can do is be me.”
once in a while. chest off the ground. Sometimes he can be a little unfiltered. On a Comic-
Con panel with his GoT costars back in 2011, he joked
about Drogo being free to cut out tongues and “rape beauti-
hell I was doing before I had kids,” he says, walking back ful women” with impunity. He apologized when footage of
toward the middle of the man cave and sitting cross-legged the incident surfaced online and caused a stir last month.
on a carpet of Astroturf. “Just fucking off. Wasting time. I Momoa hopes to be known as a kolohe, a Hawaiian
think I was pretty reckless and definitely a bit out of control. word that means “rascal, fun, misfit,” he says. “But I want
Now I’m more focused. I probably love myself more and to be remembered as, I hope, an amazing husband and a
take care of myself more because I want to stick around.” great father. My kids are my greatest piece of art. If I can
The way Momoa sees it, he has just five more summers A fighting stick
pump them full of amazing stuff and surround them with
with his children before he’s no longer a central figure in (below) is the beautiful art and music, then I’m going to live out my life
dry-land stand-
their lives. “When I was 15, I was out of the house; I was in for Aquaman’s
watching them. They’re already way smarter and just way
gone,” he says. “Right now I’m just Papa,” he says, smiling. trusty trident; better than me.” He shakes his head in disbelief. “God, I
Metallica is
Raised in Norwalk, Iowa, Momoa was the only child of Momoa’s muse on
love it,” he says. “It’s beautiful. I want it to be the greatest
a single mother, Coni. Momoa’s uncle Craig—his mom’s the bass guitar. thing I ever do: make good humans.”
Illustrations by BROWN BIRD DESIGN

88 MensHealth.com / December 2017

 3. There’s never been a better time
to pour a cold one. Craft beer has
approached maximum saturation
since its early inception in the 1980s.
In 2016, craft breweries accounted
for 5,234 of 5,301 U.S. breweries, the
Brewers Association reports. Sift

IS
through your options with apps like
BeerMenus, TapHunter, or Untappd.
Track limited-edition releases in
aluminum on Instagram (instagram.
com/canrelease). Our current obses-
sion: hazy, juicy IPAs. You’ll know

GOING
you’re on the right track if you see a
brew labeled “unfiltered” or one bear- Fig. 4
ing the ingredient lupulin powder—
hops crystals imbued with all the
dank flavor but little of the bitterness

TOBE
in a whole hops cone.
4. The NBA is nuts—and better
rested. Steph Curry’s ICBMs are
so worrisome they were condemned Fig. 6
by Trump, but the Warriors don’t

SO
have a monopoly on grudge matches. COLLEGE
/ Isaiah’s Cavs and Kyrie’s Celtics ENROLLMENT
rumble at the TD Garden (1/3) / Chris AFTER
HIGH SCHOOL
Paul (now dishing assists in Houston)
BY PETER MOORE AND THE EDITORS
takes on his former Clippers team- WHITE

MUCH
mates (1/15) / Or check the race to 72% 62%
the bottom for the 2018 draft lottery
(a good one): Bulls vs. Knicks (1/10).

BETTER
BLACK
69% 57%

Noah Graham/NBAE/Getty Images (Curry), Mike Kemp/Getty Images (bearded man)

HISPANIC
Does it seem like you can’t get through a week 76% 62%
without some sexist troll making all men look
bad? For much of 2017 it did. And we get it: Even FIG. 7
the best among us have work to do. But “we live TECHBROMUS
in the best of times ever, no matter what naysay- Favorite activity:
ers say,” former NASA astronaut Leroy Chiao showing off some techy Pew Research Center

reminds us, and “the great thing about being gadget before you
even knew it existed.
Fig. 8
a man in these times is that we have more power
to effect positive change.” Damn right. And
we can love guy stuff and not be dickheads. More
than ever, we love being dudes because... “You can piss standing up. For me, that’s always been

ILLUSTRATIONS BY TIM ENTHOVEN


FIG. 10
BABYBJORNIS
Opening line: “I got peed
on today.” Life goal:
getting baby to dig Miles
Davis’s electric period.
5. You can snatch victory from
defeat. King LeBron James is both
a goat—more championship losses
(five) than any other player—and
the G.O.A.T.: three championships,
seven straight finals appearances.
And he’s not done!
6. You can put down the razor and
pick up a date. More than 8,000
women told researchers at Austra-
Helen Sloan/courtesy of HBO (Daenerys), Roaring Brook Press (After the Fall), Sam Jones/Trunk Archive (Offerman)
lia’s University of Queensland that
they prefer light or heavy stubble for
a short-term fling (like a one-night
stand), heavy stubble is sexiest over-
all, and a bushy beard or any stubble
beats out smooth-shaven for husband
material. (We assume the women
are talking about facial hair here.)
7. You can ditch the cable guy and
not miss a damned thing. Apple TV
4K is a compact plug-in device that
uses apps and streaming services,
and ultra-high-def resolution means
your content is crystalline. With apps
for MLB, ESPN, and Fox Sports offer-
ing split-screen viewing, monitoring
all your favorite teams is too easy.
8. Your chance to score a date in
college has never been better. (See
fig. 8.) College guys win this numbers
game twice, because...
the number one advantage of being a man. You can use a gas station restroom without touching anything. —WHEELER WALKER JR., MUSICIAN / “Not
9. It’s easier than ever to marry up.
A University of Kansas study found
that “the likelihood of educational
marrying up has substantially
increased for men over time, while
women’s likelihood has decreased.”
The research revealed that market
returns for women who married
plunged over the course of a decade
as their educational levels soared.
Study author ChangHwan Kim, Ph.D.,
drily noted, “Men don’t complain a
lot about this.” Of course we don’t.
10. Being a stay-at-home dad is
cool. And more do it by choice, not
while job hunting, than they did a
decade ago. Two great reasons to try
it: 1. Dads who do an equal share of
chores raise daughters who are more
ambitious. So the time you put in now
will pay off in your retirement when
you stay in President Emma’s White
House as beloved First Dad. / 2. Stay-
at-home dads don’t have to stay at
home. Pack baby in a Mission Critical
Baby Carrier ($179, missioncritical.
cc), protect the kid’s tender eardrums
with Baby Banz noise-canceling
earmuffs ($30, amazon.com), and
make for a concert. Jay-Z is on the
road, plus the “I Love the ’90s” tour
with Vanilla Ice and Salt-N-Pepa. You
know you’re ticketed.
Fig. 9 11. You can read to your kid without
wanting to stab your eyes out.
Children’s book expert John Schu-
macher (@MrSchuReads) has five
new titles to recommend. Why Am
I Me? by Paige Britt; Happy Dreamer
by Peter H. Reynolds; After the Fall
by Dan Santat. Novels: Wishtree by
Katherine Applegate; The First Rule
of Punk by Celia C. Pérez.
Fig. 11 12. American lives come with a
second act. Tony Romo, former
QB, now killing it as a mind-reading
13
YOU CAN MAKE WHAT
YOU NEED YOURSELF.
“I’m careful about the
definition of ‘manly.’ Making
anything with one’s hands
is a very healthy pursuit.
Whether that makes you
manly or profoundly more of
a winning human is 50-50. I
know a lot of amazing women
in woodworking and there
are plenty of men I know who
are accomplished knitters.
Anytime you’re using your
craft for good is a wonderful
thing. Woodworking happens
to be where my passion led
me. I believe our society
greatly benefits from anyone
who makes something
instead of going out and
buying it.” —NICK OFFERMAN
MensHealth.com / December 2017 91
REASONS TO BEING A MAN

football analyst; Tim Tebow, for- with Prius karma ...because the
merly impersonating a pro QB, now Ford F-150 Raptor gets 22 mpg.
impersonating a baseball player; 19. There’s a legit reason to go to
Michael Phelps, former Olympian, Bed Bath & Beyond. They’ve got a
now counseling fellow troubled tailgating section in some of their
athletes like Tiger Woods; Tiger stores. We love the Pouch Couch, but
Woods, former golf great, now...? don’t inflate it near your Cuisinart
14. The Boss is on Broadway. Petite Portable Gas Grill.
15–17. For every self-driving car, 20. Man’s best herbal friend is now
Fig. 12
there’s another one that makes legal for medicinal use in 29 states.
motoring awesome again. The A Headset report found that more
FIG. 19
new Mercedes AMG E 63 has a drift than twice as many men shop at
mode, perfect for scaring the shit dispensaries as women. And there’s
TAILGATEUS REX out of the family on a grocery run. / ganja for everything on your to-do list,
Natural habitat: stadium The 460 hp 2018 Ford Mustang GT says Matt Pennington, budtender at
parking lot. Life goal:
to be awake and upright Fastback still comes in manual so Organic Alternatives in Fort Collins,
for kickoff. your kids won’t even know how to Colorado. For better sleep, try indica,
drive it. / You can score pickup power which puts the “dopey” in dope. For

TED CAVANAUGH, food styling: Michelle Gatton/Stockland Martel, prop styling: Wendy Schelah/Halley Resources (tomahawk); Guerin Blask/Redux (Kroll), Mike Stobe/Getty Images for
EA Sports (Phelps, Woods), Karwai Tang/WireImage/Getty Images (Springsteen), courtesy Ford Motor Company (2), courtesy Mercedes-Benz, Maren Caruso/Getty Images (marijuana)
energy, use sativa-packed strains and
products. For less pain, go with a body
rub containing CBD, a pot compound
that cuts inflammation and relieves
Fig. 14
aches. The folks at CBD Oil Review
(an “agnostic investigative group,” so
they keep religion out of it) rank Bio-
CBD Plus Topical Oil as a 5-star anti-
pain rub; or you can put a few drops of
Elixinol Hemp Oil Cinnamint (3,600
mg CBD) under your tongue.
21. Strong is still the new sexy.
Gal Gadot, as Wonder Woman. No

Fig. 15–17

18
MORE AND MORE, YOU CAN BE WHAT-
EVER KIND OF MAN YOU WANT TO BE.
“We try to portray that in Big Mouth, especially
with the dads. A man can be compassionate
and emotional like Elliot (Fred Armisen),
aggressive and old school like Marty (Richard
FIG. 22
Kind), cerebral and dorky like Cyrus (Jordan
Peele), or even still figuring it all out like Fig. 20 HOMO ARTISANALIS
Greg (Seth Morris). The key is to be honest Motto: “Even my emotions
and true to yourself. Just don’t be a sociopath are fair trade.” Favorite
like Guy Bilzerian (Jason Mantzoukas).” activity: building a
—NICK KROLL AND ANDREW GOLDBERG, bonfire or cheese plate.
CREATORS OF THE NETFLIX SERIES BIG MOUTH

gonna lie, the plumbing is convenient”—GREG WHITE (via Facebook) / “The coolest thing about being a man today is that we can be more emotionally

92 MensHealth.com / December 2017

22
It’s the only cut of
beef that could dou-
ble as a cudgel should
the situation turn

AH, THE
dire. Technically,
this piece of meat is a
rib eye with a length

TOMAHAWK
of rib bone left on.
You could pay (big
time) for mail order

RIB EYE. tomahawks from

lafrieda.com ($70 for
a 36- to 40-ouncer).
Or whittle your own:
Buy a bone-in rib eye
and, using long
strokes of a sharp
paring knife, remove
the meat and fat
along the bone. Sea-
son with Borsari
salt—all a good Tom-
ahawk really needs
(borsarifoods.com).
REASONS TO BEING A MAN

man outruns the lasso. Or wants
to. / Serena Williams, giving every-
body else a shot at the U.S. Open while
delivering a baby. / Taylor Swift,
during cross-examination, lowering
the boom on the groping radio host
who sued her. / Kate McKinnon, at
the Emmys with her hot girlfriend
Jackie Abbott, and so smart that she
might burn your eyeballs out with
her brain if you were to ogle. But we’ll
do it anyway. / The female Navy SEAL
candidate who dropped out during
training exercises in California. Hey,
she got farther than you would.
23. Your personal soundtrack is
more personal than ever. Vinyl’s
back, but you knew that already.
What’s better than lush album art
and the warm crackle of analog? Find-
ing new jams, courtesy of the text-
co). It tracks each song and builds a
playlist for you on Spotify for future
digital-only replays. And that’s good,
because the only thing vinyl’s lousy at
is coming along for your morning jog.
24. You don’t have to be a worka-
holic to get ahead. Cut the humble-
brag about 60–80 hour weeks. It’s
time to get human again.
25. You still don’t have to bother
with instructions. And now you can
get it right. Search a home project or
problem on YouTube, watch for three FIG. 24
Fig. 21
minutes, and you’re an instant expert. VEGANCIRAPTOR
Go to class with the Samurai Carpen- Favorite activity:
ter, Adam Savage’s One Day Builds, boasting to new clients
Essential Craftsman, or TechBuilder, about his awesome
cholesterol levels.
where a kid with braces teaches you
to do your own BB-8 droid.
26. She’ll pick out some porn
for you to enjoy together. camera is helpful. Here are three

illustration by Joel Arbaje for Men’s Health (emoji), David Paul Morris/Bloomberg/Getty Images (Bezos), Michael Zagaris/San Francisco 49ers/Getty Images (Kaepernick)
Fig. 25

to-buy service The Sound of Vinyl.
Every day they’ll send you a new pick.
There’s also Trntbl by Vinyl, the first
wireless record player ($499, trntbl.
TED CAVANAUGH, prop styling: Wendy Schelah/Halley Resources (sneakers); ZUMA Press Inc/Alamy (Gadot), screenshot of Adam Savage/“TechBuilder” on YouTube,
Watching porn with a partner sounds recommendations for couples by
hot, but pick the wrong flick and porn maven Lynsey G: / For vanilla
it can get awkward fast. That’s why couples: Takers from Wicked Pictures.
having more women behind the A near-future thriller with sky-high
production values and performers
Fig. 26 who can really act in sizzling lesbian,
hetero, and group sex scenes. / For

27
YOU DON’T HAVE TO BE AN ATHLETE horror fans: My Killer Girlfriend
TO HAVE YOUR OWN SNEAKER. is a Burning Angel Entertainment
Customizable Vans in countless color and Halloween feature film. Gorgeously
pattern combinations (including uploaded shot scenes of bondage, submission,
images) are just one way online retailers electrocution play. / For the art
make it easy to stand out from the crowd . snobs: Four Chambers is less a porn
Fig. 28 company than an art-porn collective,
and its videos are full of luscious
visuals and searing hotness.
28. You can be a geek and
still get swole.
29. You can take a knee and still
rise. Roger Federer’s reaction to
his 2016 knee injury: A recuperative
rest, followed by 2017 wins at the
Australian Open and Wimbledon.
30. You can take a knee, end up job-
less, and still rise. Whether you wear
his jersey or burn it, Colin Kaeper-
nick is an example of courage in what
he stands for and what he sits for.
Fig. 30 The view is beautiful from the high
moral ground. Take it in sometime.

vulnerable. We can cry.” —JIM O’HEIR, ACTOR / “I love that the norm is for guys to embrace style. Social media has ushered in an era where men are not

YOU CAN BE TOUGHER AT 61
31
THAN AT ANY TIME IN YOUR LIFE.
MEN’S HEALTH: Brazilian jiu-jitsu
Erik Tanner/Contour/Getty Images (Bourdain)
seems to have transformed you.
When did you start that?
ANTHONY BOURDAIN: Four or five years
ago? My then-wife was a full-time martial
artist and invited four of the least likely
people she knew to take a private training
session in the hope it would be hilariously
funny and pathetic. She picked me, Doug
from Big Gay Ice Cream, and two others.
I’d never been in a gym in my life. I was
35 pounds overweight, a chain smoker,
afraid to show the world who they are.” —DANIEL CAUDILL, SHINOLA / “Being a man is no longer something to prove. Just something to be.” —@DAMCDONALD65
flabby, zero cardio. Taking stairs was not
fun. To my shock and surprise, I endured,
barely, that first session. I found it very
strategically and intellectually intriguing.
I like problem solving and I also like being
the stupidest person in the room. I like
being at the foot of a very steep incline
where you never reach the top. It’s one
of the reasons I like Japan.
Sounds like you got hooked fast.
It was the last thing I ever thought I
would find myself doing, which is to
say, enjoy rolling around on a mat with
a bunch of sweaty dudes. But I started
taking classes and these days I mostly
train open mat, which means I show up
at academies all over the world, walk in
the door like everybody else, get in my
gi, and do five-minute rounds with any-
body who wants to fight. Even regular
warmups in white belt class and four or
five rounds of rolling get you whipped
into shape pretty good. It’s also the
hardest thing I’ve ever done. Getting
my blue belt was easily the most difficult
accomplishment of my life.
Ever gotten hurt?
I’ve torn a groin muscle. That took me
out for a few months. Other than that
I’ve been lucky. Just the usual bruises,
black eyes, cauliflower ear. I had to have
my ear reconstructed.
A cauliflower ear is a badge of honor.
Nobody picks a bar fight with you.
Yeah, it was too bad. I was proud of it.
But look, I’m 61 years old. I have limited
expectations of how I’ll do, but every
once in a while I get to feel the will to live
drain out of a 22-year-old wrestler.
Has your eating changed since you
got focused on being fit?
I was never sitting at home with a bag
of chips between meals. I eat for a living,
so I was already conscious of carbs and
sugar. But it’s not like I deprive myself.
And I don’t think about being fit. I think
about being able to do jiu-jitsu well. It’s
not like I’m looking in the mirror saying,
“Gee, you know, I need to work on that
arm.” I’m 61! I don’t have that kind of
vanity. It’s more like, “What will help me
get better in jiu-jitsu, or suck less at it?”
If jiu-jitsu were a life philosophy,
what it would be?
Humility. I’ve had my ass kicked every-
where, but it engages the mind and
pushes the body to extremes.
You did a film about Jeremiah Tower,
a chef who came out of retirement to
run Tavern on the Green in 2014.
Does his story have a lesson for you?
Jeremiah said it best: Never underesti-
mate your own ability to delude yourself.
You still love doing Parts Unknown?
I have the best job in the world. I decide
where we go and what we do when we
get there. It’s pretty awesome.
What’s your comfort food these days?
A bowl of spicy noodles on a street in
Southeast Asia, pasta out of a cracked
bowl at a family-run place in Rome, a
pastrami sandwich in New York.
What do you love about being a guy
right now?
I don’t know, honestly. I’m frequently
embarrassed by my fellow males. Most
of the people I turn to when the shit
goes down—they’re all women. So yeah,
not much! I enjoy having a penis, but
that’s because I never had a vagina.
MensHealth.com / December 2017 95
I N S I D E T H E

BY JERILYN COVERT

PHOTOGRAPHS BY
C L AY TO N C U B I T T

PAGE 96
 In the world
of orgasm
research,
scientists
are in a race
to decode
the secrets
of the female
climax.
What they’ve
found just
might help
improve her
sex life —
and yours.

O R G A S M L A B
O
Oh god,
I’m going
to
come.
I KNOW IT WHEN I FEEL IT. I KNOW WHAT WORKS WHEN I TAKE
my pleasure into my own hands. Still, I’d been told to expect performance anxiety—
after all, I’m in a strange room far from home, with someone just outside the cracked
door. You’d have to be an exhibitionist not to feel weird. (I’m not an exhibitionist.)
But that familiar, wondrous feeling arrives not long after I settle in, close my
eyes, and put my mind and fingers to work. A tingling between my legs, warmth
in my feet. Then, pure pleasure washes over me and a pulsing sensation sends
shivers throughout my body. For a brief while—21 seconds, I’d later learn—I check
out. When I open my eyes and will myself back to reality, a flatscreen deadpans:
“You’re done. Get dressed.” I straighten my dress, cast off the blanket covering
my bare legs, and try to regain my composure. “Okay,” I say, “you can come in.”
98 MensHealth.com / December 2017
Nicole Prause, Ph.D., enters the room. She’s tall, lean,
pretty in a no-bullshit kind of way—face makeup-free,
blond hair in an untidy bun. At 39, she stands out in her
field because (a) she’s a woman, and (b) she runs her
own lab, called Liberos. After leaving UCLA last year
and securing grant money, Prause became her own boss,
unfettered by university politics.
Her focus: sex as a way to promote general health—as
a treatment for depression, chronic pain, sleep disorders,
even arthritis. Someday, Prause says, doctors could pre-
scribe masturbation. “Natural, free, accessible—what
more do you want from your health care?” she asks me.
Researchers have been studying sex for more than half
a century. I watched Masters of Sex on Showtime and fig-
ured that by now we’ve learned all there is to learn about
this fundamental act. Boy, was I wrong. There remains a
remarkable amount of uncertainty about the supposed
best part—that intensely pleasurable climax.
That’s finally changing. In fact, Prause (PROW-see)
is at the forefront of a race to decode the complex cascade
of signals and inputs underlying the female orgasm. It’s a
pursuit fraught with complexity: Scientists can’t be in the
room while a volunteer is sexually aroused; grant money
is limited and tends to be weighted toward studies on dis-
eases like cancer. And sex research, well—let’s just say it’s
a tough sell at a cocktail party.
For scientists—and many women—female orgasm is
elusive and complex. Heterosexual women report reach-
ing orgasm during sex only 65 percent of the time, versus
95 percent for straight men. And being in a lab doesn’t
exactly set the mood.
But Prause, from a small, unassuming office in L.A.,
is tackling these challenges in new ways that prom-
ise to seriously advance the field—and your sex life.
YO U M I G H T T H I N K T H AT W O M E N H AV E A
leg up on men (sometimes literally) when it comes to plea-
sure. After all, research suggests that female orgasm can
be generated from at least five areas—the clitoris, the
G-spot, the cervix, the nipples, and (believe it or not)
the earlobes. Some women may even be able to achieve
orgasm using their imagination alone.
Obviously evolution wanted us women to enjoy sex.
As the renowned biological anthropologist Helen Fisher,
Ph.D., puts it, it’s to a man’s advantage to please a woman in
bed so she’ll come back and do it again. “The only way he’ll
send his DNA down through eternity is if a woman has his
baby. So it’s an adaptive mechanism to want to please her.”
In the here and now, you’ll have better sex, which leads to
more sex. Who doesn’t want that?
The dean of current orgasm research is Barry Komis-
aruk, Ph.D., of Rutgers University, who’s been studying
orgasms for 15 years. In 2004, Komisaruk and his team,
which included the author Beverly Whipple (The G Spot),
became the first to show where brain activity occurs in
women at climax. Komisaruk uses fMRI, functional mag-
netic resonance imaging. His team slides a woman into a
scanner where she masturbates while they snap pictures
of her brain. (Hot, right?) The machine records bloodflow
and oxygenation, indicators of neural activity. Among
their findings: The brain has no dedicated “sex part,” but
areas associated with pleasure and memory do light up
at orgasm. That’s what keeps us coming back for more.
During orgasm, Komisaruk told me, “so many different
brain regions are activated. That’s not surprising, because
so many body systems are activated.”
Orgasm starts with the genital sensory cortex and
then spreads to areas in the limbic system, including
the amygdala (emotional processing) and hippocampus
(memory, fantasy) along with the insula and anterior cin-
gulate cortex (visceral sensation and internal feelings).
Those last two are also activated when you feel pain, says
Komisaruk, which may explain why orgasm can have a
pain-blocking effect. And why your O face can look like
you just threw out your back.
The way the brain “lights up” is the same in men and
women, Komisaruk says, with one key difference: After
orgasm, the male brain tends to respond less to stimula-
tion, while the female brain continues to respond. That
may explain why women can have multiple orgasms,
while men usually need a break before going again.
The other significant contributor to orgasm research
is Dutch neuroscientist Janniko Georgiadis, Ph.D., who’s
done about 60 studies on orgasm from his University of
Groningen lab. For him, what’s more telling is not what
lights up in the brain but what shuts down.
Georgiadis primarily uses PET (positron emission
tomography) scans, which also track bloodflow and brain
activity. Like fMRI, PET can localize the brain activity,
but it’s slower, so the true flash point is easier to miss.
With his PET scans, Georgiadis saw some brain
regions respond, aligning with some of Komisaruk’s
findings. But to his surprise, he also found an orgasm-
related decrease of bloodflow in certain regions, espe-
cially the prefrontal cortex and the temporal cortex, areas
linked to planning and comprehension, respectively.
Arousal areas in These areas light up during the day when you’re speak-
the brain overlap
with the pain
ing, listening, thinking, engaging—anything to do with
matrix. That may conscious thought. During orgasm, they’re about 10 per-
explain why your
O face can look
cent less active compared with the stages before.
like you’re in When you climax, Georgiadis says, you have “an
pain. And why
her O face is so
altered perception of things going on around you. There
painfully hot. is less awareness, less fear. Everyone knows that you’re
less able to think clearly while you’re having an orgasm.
This fits this phenomenon really well.” COUNTDOWN TO ECSTASY
Translate this to the bedroom and you see why a Scientists gave us the data. Sex therapists
woman climaxes more easily when she’s relaxed—and gave us the how-to. The results: Science-
why planning your fantasy team helps you forestall the backed ways you can be her orgasm donor.
inevitable. In her case, she can more easily shut off those
parts of her brain; in yours, they’re being prompted to

7
light up. The gateway to orgasm is in letting go. Prep Properly
Replace “inhibitors” how great she looks
The reason one researcher sees the brain light up while
(chores, kids) with in candlelight. Nicole
the other sees it dim could be due to the different methods “excitors”—early pho- Prause, Ph.D., found
they use: Turns out, what we believe about orgasm is col- tos of you two, music, that body-negative
a scented candle, thoughts curbed
ored by the lens through which we view it.
says sex therapist Ian women’s arousal while
“It’s more an apparent contradiction than a real one,” Kerner, Ph.D. Tell her they watched porn.
says Jim Pfaus, Ph.D., a Canadian neuroscientist who stud-

6
ies orgasm in rats. (It’s a living.) One tool (PET) takes a sin- Go Slow
Don’t zero in on the
gle snapshot that represents everything that came before it, nipples or clitoris too
from desire to arousal to the main event. The other (fMRI) early—they’re not “on
shows precise moments along the way, moments that may buttons,” and being
touched in those
or may not be consistent from one test subject to another. areas can be painful
What’s more, “activation” does not always mean exci- if she’s not aroused
tation: When Komisaruk sees frontal brain regions light-
yet, says sex therapist
Lori Brotto, Ph.D. Watch
her body—erect hair
follicles is a good
sign—and follow her
lead; tell her, “I am
guided by you.”

5
No, Slower!
ing up, that may simply be the command center telling Ready for penetra-
other parts to stand down. An fMRI can see that activa- tion? Ask first. Wet
tion but can’t identify it; PET might be able to make that doesn’t mean ready.
(That’s why lube is
distinction but doesn’t isolate specific moments. a poor substitute for
To understand orgasm, says Pfaus, “you just have to foreplay.) Her vagi-
find the right time point.” nal walls should be
That’s where Prause has the advantage—because her
engorged and “pil-
lowy.” Tease the vulva
with your penis; play
with shallow thrusts,
says Kerner. Or have
her do that herself.
You can watch.

4
Stimulate Multiple Areas
method is significantly faster.

Hair and makeup: Katie Wedlund, hair and makeup assistant: Jessica Mikulski, MARK NERYS (rocket illustration), T.M. Detwiler (brain illustration)
Some experts say own experiments,
female orgasm can be says Kerner. Kiss her
generated from sev- neck, caress the small
I N H E R L A B , P R AU S E N AV I GATE S PAS T M E eral spots beyond the of her back, whisper
through the tiny room. There’s a vintage desk, a yoga mat, obvious clitoris— in her ear. And try
a guitar. A plastic tub holds electronic devices; some are nipples, earlobes, cer- stimulating the clitoris
vix, G-spot. Do your during penetration.
connected to the fingers on my left hand. (My right had

3
Stop Worrying About Her
Your well-intentioned of contact—your
check-ins (“Almost interlocked hands,
THIS IS HER BRAIN ON ORGASM there?”) can interrupt
her flow, says sex ther-
where your bellies
touch, how her breast
apist Erica Marchand, feels against your lips.
1 Ph.D. Focus instead, Notice texture, tem-
says Brotto, on points perature, vibrations.
2

2
Have Fun!
3 Humor helps turn If you slip out or fall
off the thinking part off the bed, so what?
4 of your brain so you She won’t care. So
can both focus on lighten up. (Check out
pleasure. Know that hystericalliterature.
there’s no one right com for our favorite
5
way, says Marchand. sexy-funny videos.)

1
Find Entrainment
Steady rhythm is key. moment: “Faster or
Start with a rhythm slower?” “Softer or
and pressure that harder?” “How does
feels natural, says that feel?” Not: “What
Marchand. Ask easy, should I do?” If she
brief questions so seems close, don’t
she can stay in the change a thing! —J.C.

been occupied.) A plated band wraps around my right
upper arm, and a multipronged headset clings to my skull.
Prause parks herself on a wooden chest beside the com-
puter screen, which now displays a single line that slopes
gradually down before breaking into wild undulations at
about the 15-minute mark. “That could be orgasm,” she
says, peering closer. “Yeah, that could work.”
With data like this, Prause hopes to answer some
surprisingly fundamental physiological questions:
What kind of touch and movement intensify arousal? Is
orgasm distinct from heightened arousal, or just more
of the same? Is it the pinnacle of pleasure or, technically
speaking, the moment the brain puts on the brakes?
My orgasm in Prause’s lab was recorded by an EEG, or
electroencephalogram, which measures brain activity;
hence the headset. Prause has used EEG data since her
days studying psychophysiology (how the mind and body
interact) at Indiana University, where she studied at the
Kinsey Institute and earned her Ph.D.
Unlike fMRI and PET, an EEG isn’t very good at show-
ing the “where,” but it’s excellent at showing the “when”
of a brain event. It can pick up on changes in intervals
of 20 thousandths of a second, compared to fMRI’s two-
second updates and PET’s one-minute-or-longer updates.
Prause says that makes it better for measuring orgasm,
which can be very transient and generally happens only
once—so if you miss it, you’re out of luck.
Prause pulls up images of my brain captured as I was
masturbating. We’re looking at alpha, one of many electri-
cal waves fluctuating through the brain constantly. Alpha
is present when your brain is idling or in a wakeful relaxed
state—as in daydreaming or just zoning out. Along with
another wave called theta, it’s linked to meditation and
what athletes call “flow state.” When alpha’s high, you’re
feeling chill. Let’s call it “chill wave” for now.
A color spectrum on the monitor goes from dark blue
(low chill) to green to orange to yellow (high chill). Only
one brain image is completely yellow—the “stimulate to
orgasm” brain. (But crucially, not during actual orgasm.)
Another chart, a spectogram, shows a bright line
extending with a few breaks across the graph. That line
indicates chill and should be brighter during higher levels
of sexual arousal. Sure enough, it starts at a point when I’m
self-stimulating and fantasizing. (Sorry, not telling!)
The line is brightest just before orgasm, indicating
where my brain has gone full chill. But during orgasm (I’d
hit a button at start and finish) the line disappears, as if my
orgasm turned my normal consciousness back on.
Generally, my alpha activity fits a pattern Prause has
seen before. That pattern is her most surprising discov-
ery so far, a working hypothesis she described to me as
the “sympathetic nervous system switch.” (Her research
on the topic has been accepted for publication by the
Archives of Sexual Behavior.)
T
THIS “SWITCH
HER AROUSAL
theory” (my term) holds
that climax is linked
TIMELINE
to an off-switch in our
brain. Both Komisaruk
and Georgiadis had con-
cluded something simi-
lar. Prause’s twist: The
switch is flipped well
= ALPHA WAVES
before orgasm happens.
To begin, Prause had me think of something sexy. BANAL THOUGHTS
Sometimes she shows her study participants a por- Not much
nographic image; sometimes they self-stimulate with alpha
a genital vibrator. When her volunteers first become
BEGIN ORAL SEX
aroused, their chill generally quiets down. They’re paying Got my
attention. But when they’re asked to attempt an orgasm, attention
the chill shoots up. To trigger orgasm, your brain may
MORE BANAL THOUGHTS
have to zone out, as indicated on my results.
For Prause, it’s not that the orgasm triggers deactiva- Buzzkill
tions in the brain; it’s that the deactivations in the brain
are necessary to trigger orgasm. FANTASIZE
“Janniko, and to some extent Barry, are arguing that Oh, boy!
there’s increased activation especially in frontal areas,
and that after orgasm happens the brain shuts down,” TRY TO ORGASM
Prause told me. “We’re arguing that orgasm is not the off Total
alpha!
switch, that to get to orgasm you had to flip that switch
before.” She suspects that if Rutgers researchers were to ORGASM
sample more rapidly and look at the time period preced- Back to
reality
ing orgasm, they’d find data to support her hypothesis.
If orgasm marked the height of pleasure, you’d think
chill waves would keep rising. But they don’t; they drop.
That makes orgasm not an off-switch but more like a “back
on” switch, pulling you out of the trance that preceded it.
For Prause, this suggests that the best part of sex—the
thing that keeps you coming back for more—is not the
orgasm but the part leading up to it, what she refers to as
a high-pleasure state and the kids call “edging,” when you
deliberately delay orgasm to make sex last longer, poten- START
tially making the eventual orgasm stronger.
Your takeaway: If she doesn’t have an orgasm and
insists she’s fine, she might actually mean it. “Orgasm
isn’t magic,” says Prause. “Not that it’s not reinforcing,
SEXY
but everything before it is also reinforcing.” THOUGHT
Some women may even confuse high arousal for
orgasm and still report satisfaction. During her research,
Prause found many of the women reporting orgasm did
not have the pelvic contractions traditionally used to
define it. At first she thought the anal probe—which
TRY TO
senses the contractions—was faulty. But as the trend ORGASM
persisted, she realized that these women were not expe-
riencing orgasms, even though they believed they were.
(She did not see this in men.)
Komisaruk and others maintain that women do know
when they’re having an orgasm and CONTINUED ON P. 116 FINISHED
MensHealth.com / December 2017 101
 You really can eat healthy at chain restaurants—these
picks prove it. Here’s exactly what to order for the body you want.
PAGE 102
BY
BRITTANY RISHER AND
PAUL KITA PHOTOGRAPHS BY
LEVI BROWN
MORE THAN A MILLION RESTAURANTS ARE OPEN FOR BUSINESS King are losing ground to ingredient-forward spots
in the United States. But the landscape is shifting: like Chipotle and Panera. We analyzed the menus
The Corner Bakery
According to a 2017 National Restaurant Association of more than two dozen chain restaurants in search Café’s Anaheim
report, consumers want to know more about what’s in of the healthiest options—more protein, more fiber, Panini (and a
half): Wake up
their doggie bag. Titans like McDonald’s and Burger less empty carbs (including sugar). Read up. Eat up. with some protein
and produce.

MensHealth.com / December 2017 103

 CORNER BAKERY Most chain-based breakfast options have about
TOP A.M. GRAB
as much color as Anne Hathaway. This pick
Anaheim has (gasp!) actual tomato, onion, and avocado.
Order it on a “Power Flat” to cut 120 empty
Panini carb calories and kick up the fiber by a gram.
ADD THIS
A 20 oz whole-milk cappuccino. With the sand-
wich, this duo has nearly the protein of two Egg
McMuffins but 20 fewer grams of carbs. 620
calories, 33g protein, 41g carbs (5g fiber), 35g fat

CHIPOTLE
BEST DELICIOUS,
NUTRITIOUS TACOS

3 CRISPY
CORN
TORTILLAS
Chipotle’s mix-and-
match ordering
entrusts you to pick
the good stuff. But
you can easily go
overboard, creating
a calorie pileup. So
here’s what you can
tell the salsa slinger
behind the counter:
chicken, fajita vege-
tables, cheese, pinto
beans, guacamole,
and romaine lettuce.
This combo provides
50 percent more
protein per taco than
Taco Bell’s Crunchy
Taco Supreme does.
645 calories, 50g
protein, 57g carbs
(13g fiber), 26g fat

CHICK-FIL-A / BEST LUNCH COMBO MEAL

GRILLED CHICKEN COOL WR AP, SALAD, ICED TEA

Don’t choose a “supersize” option unless you want a supersized waistline.
Instead, find combo meals that offer the most good stuff for your calories. Flax-
seed flour flatbread, lettuce, red cabbage, and carrots pack 15 grams of fiber in Food styling: Jamie Kimm, prop styling: Christopher Stone/Halley Resources

this mighty chicken-and-cheese wrap. The side salad pumps up the produce (go
with light balsamic dressing), and the unsweetened tea will push you past the
midafternoon slump. 510 calories, 42g protein, 51g carbs (18g fiber), 23g fat

CRACKER BARREL McDONALD’S / BEST DESSERT

BEST DISH FROM A PLACE YOU’D LEAST EXPECT
Cuties
Lemon Pepper Rainbow Trout, The quickest way to sink a smart
Turnip Greens, Broccoli order is to tack on a dessert. Of all
the menus we analyzed, no dessert
Crazy, right? Cracker Barrel’s burgers, sandwiches, and could satisfy our rule of keeping a
“country fried” anything are nutritional no-gos. But these two lid on portion size and added sug-
fillets carry a massive 43 grams of protein for just 330 calo- ars—except at one chain (pause for
ries and hardly a carb in sight. Look at you go, Cracker Barrel! shock): McDonald’s. Eat as many
Just stay away from all the crap in the gift shop. of these mandarin oranges as you
470 calories, 57g protein, 12g carbs (8g fiber), 18g fat want. Just 35 calories a pop!
WENDY’S / BEST
CHEESEBURGER

Dave’s
Single
Burger cravings hap-
pen. When they do,
grab this. It has the
best protein-to-carb SMALL
(including sugar and
fiber) balance of the
BITES
lot. Yes, fanboys, that
WITH BIG
includes Five Guys. RETURNS
You can even add the You can trust
value-sized fries and these add-
still come out at 800 ons, apps, and
calories for the meal. pint-sized
A plain baked potato portions.
is more nutritious,
though. Just saying. Superior
570 calories, 30g Meal Rounder-
protein, 39g carbs (3g Outer
fiber), 34g fat Chick-fil-A
Superfood Side
(small)
TGI FRIDAYS / BEST SALAD THAT ACTUALLY TASTES GOOD Kale, broccolini,
SMART MOVE almonds, pecans,

MILLION DOLLAR COBB SALAD TGIF serves the

green goddess
dressing on the
walnuts, and dried
cherries—from a
place known for its
Romaine and kale make the bed. Avocado, tomato, side. This helps
fried chicken, no
red onion, cucumber, cheddar, bacon, hard-boiled egg, you cut extra
less. It’s so tasty you
calories and also
flat iron steak, and blue cheese make things interest- keeps the greens don’t even need the
ing. You could order it with grilled chicken instead, but from going soggy. maple vinaigrette.
a man can only eat so many grilled-chicken salads. 140 calories, 3g
protein, 16g carbs
790 calories, 50g protein, 29g carbs (8g fiber), 56g fat (2g fiber), 7g fat

Power Appetizer
Red Lobster
Signature Shrimp
Cocktail
No matter what
restaurant you’re in,
front-loading your
meal with protein
is a good way to fill
up faster and avoid
junk later in the
meal. These plump,
meaty shrimp are
nearly perfect.
130 calories, 21g
protein, 11g carbs
(0g fiber), 0g fat

Kid-Friendly Menu
Panera
PB&J on whole
grain with chicken
noodle soup will
shut up the picky
ones. Child-sized
Caesar salads
and turkey chili
will indulge the
adventurous types.
No cheap toys or
creepy clowns
either. Plus, stuff
adults can eat too!

MensHealth.com / December 2017 105

FOUR UNDERDOG CHAINS TO WATCH
Its focus is on nutrient- It’s like a Chipotle for Plenty of chains pay Former NBA star

1
FRESHII
dense, customizable
meals—like burritos,
wraps, salads, soups,
and bowls. The plan
is to have 730 loca-
2
CORELIFE
bowl-based meals.
Pick the base (soup,
salad, grains), add
the protein, and then
choose your toppings.
3
SWEET-
lip service to ingredi-
ent sourcing. This
place lists where its
food comes from on
a big wall. It’ll have
4
GROWN
Ray Allen and his wife
opened this organic
spot in 2016. Both
locations are in Flor-
ida, with one inside a
tions open by 2020. EATERY In select states. GREEN 90 locations by 2019. Walmart, of all places.

MENU HIGHLIGHT MENU HIGHLIGHT MENU HIGHLIGHTS MENU HIGHLIGHTS

Steak, Egg, & Cheese Grilled Chicken Tortilla Fish Taco Bowl, Gua- Breakfast Salad,
Breakfast Burrito Broth Bowl camole Greens Salad Cuban Coffee

SUBWAY / BEST POULTRY PICK

6" Rotisserie-
Style Chicken
This sub has a gut-filling 29 grams
of protein, and you can pile on
as much produce as you can han-
dle. (Play a round of toppings
Jenga with the sandwich artist.)
Bonus: In 2016, Subway switched
to antibiotic-free chicken in its
U.S. locations. That means fewer
antibiotic-resistant bacteria in you.

ADD THIS
Veggie Delite Salad with oil-and-
vinegar dressing. Otherwise, the
OLIVE GARDEN 350-calorie sandwich may leave
BEST PASTA PICK you hungry in a few hours.
WITH PERKS For both: 680 calories, 32g protein,

LINGUINE
56g carbs (9g fiber), 27g fat
SMART MOVE

DI MARE Olive Garden’s

Taste of the
Mediterranean
It’s tough to menu also
find an Italian has grilled
salmon and
chain that

THE ELLAPHANT IN THE ROOM (food illustrations), MIGHTY SHORT (napkin illustration and spot illustrations)
chicken
serves some- piccata with
thing beyond zucchini.
empty carbs.
But this OG
STARBUCKS / STRONGEST
entrée tops SIT-AND-EAT DAY STARTER
pasta with high-
protein mussels Eggs & Cheese
and shrimp, Protein Box
plus a light Eating on the run never fills you up
tomato sauce. quite like planting your butt and
570 calories, chowing. Research bears this out.
So pick up this tapas-style break-
46g protein, fast of hard-boiled eggs, apples,
76g carbs (16g grapes, cheddar, multigrain bread,
fiber), 22g fat and peanut butter. You’ll net 23
grams of protein and a serving of
ADD THIS fruit before noon. Then savor the
Famous House Salad. day. 460 calories, 23g protein,
Iceberg-based and 40g carbs (5g fiber), 24g fat
studded with vege-
tables, it’s still good ADD THIS
even if you order it Starbucks Sous Vide Egg Bites:
with half the dressing Bacon & Gruyere. Two of these
to cut calories. cups provides 19 grams of protein.
 HALL OF
SHAME
Worst Breakfast
Burger King
BK Ultimate
Breakfast Platter
1,190 cal, 27g pro-
tein, 123g carbs (5g
fiber, 32g sugars),
66g fat

Worst Burger
Hardee’s
⅔ lb Monster
Thickburger
1,300 cal, 76g
protein, 53g carbs
(2g fiber, 13g
sugars), 90g fat

Worst Lunch
Panera
Mac & Cheese
in a Bread Bowl
1,140 cal, 43g protein,
166g carbs (6g fiber,
8g sugars), 35g fat

BOSTON MARKET / OPTIMAL POSTWORKOUT PROTEIN FEED Worst Pasta

Applebee’s

HALF CHICKEN, POTATOES, VEGETABLES Firecracker

Shrimp Cavatappi
1,960 cal, 50g protein,
Boston Market is yet another chain that has gone antibiotic-free for its rotisserie 150g carbs (8g fiber,
chicken. That means you can go face-deep into this feast guilt-free. Skip the 20g sugars), 131g fat
cornbread, which is high in sugar, and opt for the steamed vegetables. You can also
pick around the chicken skin to cut some calories, but what are you, some kind of Worst Salad
Instagram fitness model? 740 calories, 78g protein, 41g carbs (9g fiber), 31g fat The Cheesecake
Factory Chinese
Chicken Salad
1,760 cal, 59g
RUBY TUESDAY protein, 135g carbs
BEST ALL-YOU-
CAN-EAT OPTION SMOOTHIE KING / MOST SATISFYING SMOOTHIE (11g fiber, 62g

GLADIATOR CHOCOLATE
sugars), 110g fat
Garden
Bar Worst Vegetarian
Quiznos

WITH PB & BANANA, 20 OZ

This chain has
updated the so-’80s
concept of a salad bar
with shredded kale,
roasted corn, eda-
mame, beets, wasabi
peas, hummus, and
spicy roasted broccoli.
Wing night isn’t going
to offer any of that. Pile
your plate till it looks
like a silage mound.
450 calories, 20g
protein, 40g carbs
(13g fiber), 22g fat
12" Veggie
Guacamole
1,240 cal, 42g
protein, 121g carbs
We’ve seen smoothies that contained (10g fiber, 14g
as much sugar as three cans of Pepsi. This sugars), 67g fat
one’s sane and has micellar casein, “a
slower-digesting protein with enough Worst Dessert
Outback Steak-
leucine to maximize your body’s protein house Chocolate
synthesis,” says Mike Roussell, Ph.D., author Thunder from
of The MetaShred Diet. 550 calories, Down Under
56g protein, 34g carbs (7g fiber), 25g fat 1,540 cal, 17g protein,
137g carbs (6g fiber,
119g sugars), 106g fat

MensHealth.com / December 2017 107

 JUSTICE
L E AGU E
Adventures in purpose,
community, and fitness with
a cadre of teachers, artists,
and trainers by day—and crime-
fighting crusaders by night.

BY PHOTOGRAPHS BY

CHRIS LEE PETER BOHLER

PAGE Clockwise from top left: Nyght,
109 Nightingale, Yce, Mr. Xtreme,
Midnight Highwayman, Messenger.
 Pursuing a bad guy—yes, he calls them
bad guys—down an alley behind a nightclub
in Seattle’s Belltown neighborhood, the self-
described masked adventurer found himself
dodging bullets being fired by the gunman
over his left shoulder as he sprinted.
Jones was prepared. He positioned his
Baker Batshield, a ballistic armor panel he
wears on his back “like a pair of really awe-
some wings.” The shield complements his
custom-made supersuit, which is replete with
artificial abs and pecs. “A bullet ricochets
off the top of the shield and into my suit but
doesn’t penetrate,” says Jones.
“I’m panicking. But I keep running. I’m
thinking, ‘I want to die running forward
into battle.’ And after a while the bad guy
stops, drops the gun, and hits the floor. The
cops run around the corner. He looks at them
and goes, ‘The bullets don’t work! I shot him
eight times!’ ” Jones, who is a chiseled 5'11"
and weighs 200 pounds, emits a peal of crazy
laughter. “He’s been pulling the trigger. I’m
flinching—because that’s what you do when
someone shoots at you—and I’m not slowing
down. He thinks he’s shooting me every time.
I’m realizing this guy is a complete idiot!”
110 MensHealth.com / December 2017
Idiots, take heed: Phoenix Jones is hardly the only self-styled superhero out
there prepared to take a bullet in the name of all that’s good and right. Across the
United States, an estimated 250 otherwise regular Joes and Janes absent any
actual superpowers are suiting up as costumed crusaders, putting their personal
safety on the line to deter street crime. In the past 20 years, the movement has
spread; now they operate out of cities great and small across North America: New
York; Atlanta; Tampa; Chicago; Rochester, Minnesota; Vancouver; and Los Ange-
les. They seek one another out and compare costumes as well as crime-fighting
techniques via all the usual, modern-day Bat channels: Facebook, Instagram,
YouTube, and, most comprehensively, reallifesuperheroes.com.
They hold day jobs as security officers and club bouncers but also as artists,
musicians, teachers, health care workers, and combat sports instructors, and they
adopt fanciful names like Crimson Fist, Good Samaritan, and Vigilante Spider.
They prowl the night breaking up bar fights, foiling drug deals, and preventing
sexual assaults. But they also commit random acts of kindness, such as dispensing
first aid, disposing of hypodermic needles, or even just lending a sympathetic
ear to the homeless. The police generally find them useful as deterrents and wit-
nesses—but don’t want them getting in the way or getting hurt.
You can call these activists vigilantes or weirdos, but each, in his or her own
way, operates from a place of moral outrage, working to plug a hole in the system
that’s underserved by law enforcement and widened by public apathy toward suf-
fering. “Phoenix Jones is a character who believes in everything I want to be true,”
says Ben Fodor, 29, who works with juvenile cancer patients at an area hospital
when he’s not on patrol. “Without being Phoenix Jones, I would have gone crazy.”
At a time when a new Marvel movie opens seemingly every month, superheroes
run rampant in our cultural imagination. At the same time, more people are work-
ing mundane jobs and questioning their purpose on the planet. Job satisfaction is
 XJL patrols in full hero regalia from 11 p.m.
to 3 a.m. every weekend.
The outfits are not just for cosplay, an
XJL member named Nightingale tells me.
(She and others in the League asked not to be
identified by their real names for fear of retri-
bution by, you know, bad guys.) Eye-catching
getups like hers—leather bustier, utility belt
filled with medical supplies, and a fishnet
mask—can defuse dangerous situations just
because they’re so comic-booky. “They act as
an immediate de-escalator,” explains Night-
ingale, who’s a nurse outside the Xtreme Jus-
tice League. “You’re angry, you look up, that
costume is just enough to break your focus.”
A retired Marine who served in Iraq and
Afghanistan, Nyght, 36, wears a retrofit-
ted paintball gun mask and 150 pounds of
tactical gear, including a bulletproof vest.
“I’ve had bottles broken over my head,” he
says. “The face mask protects my mouth and
nose.” At 6 feet and 221 pounds, Nyght holds
black belts in multiple disciplines and leads
the Xtreme Justice League’s group workouts.
Members must pass a fitness test (see “Build
Some Superhero Strength,” page 114) and
train together several nights a week in a gym.
at 50.8 percent, down from 61.1 in 1987, according to the While the XJL considers fistfighting a last
Conference Board. Concurrently, fatal police shootings resort, the group also receives free training in
of unarmed people regularly spark massive protests and the Israeli martial art Krav Maga, courtesy of
SUIT UP
paroxysms of civil unrest. Hurricanes. Wildfires. Mass the San Diego Krav Maga Academy.
“Nyght” wears shootings. Everything is falling apart. On patrol one night in San Diego, I meet
150 pounds of
tactical gear The real-life superhero movement can be seen as a Xtreme Justice League members Yce (a
while on patrol. direct response to a sense of powerlessness permeating solemn 19-year-old wearing tactical gear
society, says Jamon Halvaksz, Ph.D., who teaches a course
at the University of Texas at San Antonio called Anthropology of Superheroes.
“People feel isolated, disempowered. Their jobs hold no passion. But as real-life
superheroes, they can reclaim some of that power by making connections with
others under a different persona. They are able to make a change.”
Many of these real-life guys share the bulging muscles of their comic-book
heroes. They’re ripped, fighting fit, diesel. They’ve developed workout regimens
they claim provide distinct advantages in battling bad guys. “You want to be able to
perform at your max potential,” says Nyght, a middle-linebacker-size patrol leader
of San Diego’s Xtreme Justice League who resembles John Cena but frequently
gets compared to a certain Batman villain. “Our goal is to be a physical, visual
Austin Hargrave/August Images (Phoenix Jones)

deterrent. When you see yoked Bane in a flak jacket and he’s yelling at you to stop
fighting in the middle of the street, you want to do that.” Nyght’s day job is in an
elementary school; he’s a special education teacher.
The San Diego league was founded 11 years ago—a time of high gang activity—
by a guy who calls himself Mr. Xtreme. Nowadays, the group is an entrenched PHOENIX JONES
presence in the city’s Gaslamp Quarter, a crowded precinct of bars and nightclubs HEALTH CARE WORKER,
that reeks of stale beer and teems with inebriated tourists, servicemen, and college PART-TIME PRO MMA FIGHTER
kids making poor life decisions. Violent crime is down in the area from 129 per SEATTLE, WA
1,000 people in 2006 to 105 per 1,000 people (so far) this year. This is where the

A
THE DARK GUARDIAN
MARTIAL ARTS INSTRUCTOR
NEW YORK CITY
who intends to enroll in training courses to
become a Navy SEAL), Hawt Flash (a woman
in a red cape and yellow sunglasses—at
night), and a new recruit who calls himself
Jedi Cholo (a nightclub bouncer carrying a
lightsaber with a canister of pepper spray
stashed in his Yoda backpack). We observe
a pack of drunken frat boys, one of whom
wields a plastic sword, sprint up with seem-
ingly less than the best of intentions.
After some trash talk—“What are you
guys supposed to be?” “Are you Darth Vader
or something?” and “Y’all are like the Super
Friends for real!”—one of them takes note
of a sewn-on patch in the middle of Nyght’s
bulletproof vest that says “F*CK ISIS.” And
just as quickly, the bros became chummy,
congratulatory even: “Yeah, fuck ISIS! You
guys are cool!” Nyght remains guarded, but
cordial. “I try not to overreact,” he says. “You
never know when the shit’s gonna hit the
fan.” He credits the Marines with teaching
him to be tactically aware. “You’re in the mid-
dle of a 5-mile run and all of a sudden your
drill instructor comes up to ask you about
general orders. You’re not thinking about
that. You’re thinking about your next breath
and the fact you’ve got battery acid pumping
through your quads. So it’s about thinking
clearly through pain and duress. One way to
do that is to red-line it during a circuit train-
ing session and start naming the 50 states.”
112 MensHealth.com / December 2017
It’s a little past 3 a.m. on a moonless night when the Xtreme Justice League and
I return from patrol to their preferred meeting spot, the San Diego Hall of Justice.
Everyone is tired, but also energized. It’s been a quiet night by their standards: no
fights or assaults, no identifiable crimes prevented. I ask Nyght if he feels relieved
or frustrated. “I live with the anxiety of ‘What did I miss?’” he says. “But I get a
certain amount of peace knowing I went out and gave it my all.” Officially, San
Diego credits community policing strategies with helping to lower its crime rates,
but they also praise the efforts of the Xtreme Justice League. “They’ve been good
witnesses for us for crimes that have occurred,” says Officer Joshua Hodge of the
San Diego Police Department. “I’ve never heard anything bad about them. We
don’t want them to put themselves in a situation where they could be hurt. At the
same time, if they’re helping out a citizen in need, we’re not going to tell people no.”
GIACOMO FORTUNATO (Dark Gaurdian)
AC R O S S TH E C O U NTRY I N G O TH A M , A N O TH E R R E A L- LI F E
superhero, the Dark Guardian, takes a different tack. He avoids bar areas altogether.
“I’m looking out for people who are truly up to no good,” says Chris Pollak (his real
name), 33. “I’m going into the projects. My focus is street crime: drugs, prostitu-
tion.” The martial arts instructor started calling himself the Dark Guardian 15
years ago. Back then, he wasn’t a member of the Guardian Angels, the beret-wearing
crime-prevention crew in New York City that rose to national prominence in the
1970s. But since last year he’s been pulling dou-
ble duty, running a Guardian Angels chapter on
Staten Island and traveling throughout the five
boroughs on his own, dressed in his signature
red bulletproof vest, leather jacket, and match-
ing red pants. While on patrol, the Dark Guard-
ian also picks up garbage and hands out food to
the homeless. “People have flashed guns at me,
got in my face, threatened to kill me,” he says.
“But if we want a good, safe, strong community,
somebody has to do something about it.”
The Dark Guardian, a third-degree black belt
in Kenpo karate, fights in amateur Muay Thai
bouts and trains in Brazilian jiu-jitsu and box-
ing. He’s also proficient in Eskrima, a martial
art of the Philippines that employs knives and
sticks, among other tools. He trains three days a
week, kicking a heavy bag and sparring. On top
of that, he lifts free weights and does extensive
calisthenics. “I do 200 pushups and sets of five
chinups until I reach 100,” he says. “I’ll do sets of
20 burpees until I reach 100. I do ab exercises a
couple of days a week: leg raises, flutter kicks, sit-
ups, Russian twists, planks, hip dips. I mix it up.”
The Dark Guardian sees himself as a sym-
bol. “I want to inspire people to do something
because they care about their community,” says
Pollak. “Take notice. Do something.”
In the age of litigation, the smartest move is
not to shout, “Stop, you’re under citizen’s arrest!”
he says. Laws vary from state to state, and often
perps will confront you. But you can help stop a
crime before the cops show up. This is the Dark
Guardian’s protocol.
 STEP ONE Ask yourself: Could your involvement get
you or someone else hurt?
“
STEP T WO Call the police. Describe in detail what’s
ASSEMBLE
going on and the actions you’re taking. If you’re caught in
San Diego’s
Xtreme Justice
a sticky situation, they’re just around the corner. People have
STEP THREE Pull out your smartphone and start film-
League, out
on the town. ing. If you shout, “Hey, the police have been called and flashed guns
you’re on video,” usually the perpetrator will stop what-
ever he’s doing, because you’ve got the hard evidence right in your hand. at me. But if
STEP FOUR If you must get involved, try to defuse. Talk down the situation, using
a noncombative tone. Slowly back the guy into a corner until the police arrive. we want a safe
STEP FIVE Make sure you know your state’s laws; most allow the use of equal force
if things get physical. If you throw the first punch, you could run into legal trouble. community,
If he throws the first punch, block it; punch back only if necessary.
STEP SIX Should the perp pull a knife or gun, run. The cops should be there by now,
somebody has
but if you weren’t able to call them, wait until you’re at a safe distance to dial 911.
STEP SEVEN If the criminal decides to run and your life isn’t in danger, follow
to do something
from a distance. Make sure he doesn’t notice you trailing him, but jog to keep
up if he’s running. (Note: Officer Hodge does not recommend following the crim-
about it.
inal). Update the police about the getaway as you go. CONTINUED ON P. 117

/
BUILD SOME SUPERHERO
1 2
ENDURANCE PULLING POWER
1-mile run, Do dead-hang
or 4 laps around pullups (or chin-
a track ups) for 1 minute
TO QUALIFY TO QUALIFY
Finish in under 5 for men,
10 minutes 2 for women
NYGHT’S 2017 TIME NYGHT
6:30 16

4 5
CORE POWER TO QUALIFY
60
HUMAN DRAG TO QUALIFY
Pass
The XJL tests crunches in 1 minute. Have a friend lie motionless
To protect your back, do hollow-body on the grass. Pick him up under
rocks instead: Lie on your back, legs NYGHT the armpits from behind and NYGHT
straight, arms extended overhead, 100 drag him backward for 25 yards. Passed
lower back pressed into the floor; rock Can’t find a volunteer? Use a
back and forth. Aim for 30 in 1 minute. heavy boxing bag.

114 MensHealth.com / December 2017

STRENGTH
Try the Xtreme Justice League’s physical fitness test—
and don’t underestimate it. Prospective XJL heroes test
in combat boots, and XJL leader Nyght routinely trains
in his 50-pound flak jacket. He suggests a 30-pound
weight vest for this. Rest 5 minutes between exercises.

3 PUSHING POWER
Do pushups for 1 minute COMIC COMBAT 101
If you ever find yourself cornered in a dark alley, use the XJL’s blend of
TO QUALIFY NYGHT Brazilian jiu-jitsu and Krav Maga to defend yourself. (Also, call 911.)
50 for men, 70
30 for women
ESCAPE A HEADLOCK

1. Relax your body, 2. Step your right leg 3. Push forward with
and place your left outside your oppo- your right hand as you
hand on the bad nent’s right leg and steady your center of
guy’s forearm. Pull drive your right hand gravity and perp falls
his forearm down. upward into his jaw. backward. Cuff him!

ESCAPE A GRAB FROM BEHIND

1. Drop down hard, 2. Grab the bad guy’s 3. Step your left leg
using your weight and left arm with your around your oppo-
gravity. Simultane- right hand and press nent’s right side, and
ously drive your arms it down, while driv- use your left elbow
up, flaring your elbows ing your left elbow up to knock him down.
to break the guy’s grip. toward his head. Utter wisecrack!

COUNTER A ROUNDHOUSE KICK

6
FIREMAN CARRY TO QUALIFY
Pass
Hoist a willing volun- 1. Step forward with 2. Hold the villain’s 3. Step your right leg
teer (not a kid!) onto
your shoulders so that his NYGHT your left leg. Now leg with your left hand; behind his left ankle
chest is on one side and Passed lift both of your fore- then, in one swift and yank up with your
his legs are on the other arms to chest level move, punch your left hand, tripping
side. Run 25 yards. in order to absorb the right hand toward him backward. Strike
impact of the kick. his right armpit. Superman stance!

ILLUSTRATIONS BY BRANDON LOVING

 INSIDE THE ORGASM LAB, FROM P. 101
that you don’t have to count contractions to
prove it. (Georgiadis had a finding similar
to Prause’s; for many of his female subjects,
the anal probe’s signal was “messy,” lacking
the clear pattern seen in men.) Even Prause’s
male research partner was skeptical.
“I think it’s funny that I’m the only
woman in this bunch,” Prause says, “and I’m
like, ‘Women are terrible at telling orgasms.’”
All this made me think about my orgasm
in the little room, which felt great—and, yes,
was confirmed by anal probe data. But is the
release the thing? Maybe the wondrous feel-
ing I’ve been enjoying for 15 years is actually
the high-pleasure state and not orgasm at all.
Maybe it’s the path to climax we should’ve
been pursuing all this time.
PRAUSE AND HER PEERS PRACTICE
basic research—collecting first-order physi-
ological data and creating theories to explain
their results. But other scientists are in a
headier space. Take Adam Safron, Ph.D., a
neuroscientist from Northwestern University.
According to Safron, the rhythms of sex—the
repetitive movement of body, hands, and
fingers between partners—can sync brain
rhythms through “entrainment,” leading to
highly pleasurable focused attention, almost
a trancelike state of consciousness. It’s “flow”
all over again. In that state, says Safron, “the
rhythm is all there is.” When your brain
rhythms sync up with an outside stimulus, you
can attend to that stimulus more easily. “The
more you attend, the more you can be entrained
by a rhythm,” Safron told me. “And the more
in sync you are, the better you can attend.”
This may explain why we can zoom in on
rhythmic experiences like music, he says.
“They outcompete other things for your
attention,” says Safron. “This is part of why
people like these experiences: They’re engag-
ing with something highly pleasurable in a
very focused manner, and they’re also able to
let go of things that are less pleasurable, like
thinking about jobs, taxes, or laundry.”
Sounds a little like meditation, I point out.
“I’d say it’s a lot like meditation,” Safron
responds.
For Prause, that’s precisely what hap-
pens when that off switch flips: You enter
entrainment. (Aptly, she’s currently study-
ing whether genital stimulation can offer the
same benefits as meditation.)
116 MensHealth.com / December 2017
IF PRAUSE’S WORK SHIFTS THE EMPHASIS
AWAY FROM ORGASM AND TOWARD THE
“ JOURNEY, THEN “ENTRAINMENT” BRINGS
THAT SHIFT HOME, INTO YOUR BEDROOM.
If Prause’s work shifts the emphasis away
from orgasm and toward the journey there,
then Safron’s theory takes that shift and
brings it home, into your bedroom. Turns
out, viewing sex as a form of meditation may
actually be a good idea.
Meditation is a practice, something you
improve at over time, like learning to play
a musical instrument—you get better and
better at absorption and at letting go of dis-
tractions. Imagine sex as a practice (not a
performance), and maybe you can relax.
Meditation also means staying present: If
thoughts arise, you acknowledge them briefly
and then let them go. That feels good because
you’re not stressing out, you’re not ruminat-
ing. Staying present in bed, focusing on your
breath or the touch of her skin against yours,
also feels good and may help turn off the kind
of self-monitoring that can lead to anxiety
and sexual dysfunction.
All of this can enhance the sexual experi-
ence in a powerful way: As you become more
in sync with the rhythms, you can tune out
distractions more easily, which in turn frees
you up to focus on pleasure.
This not only makes sex more fun but can
also deepen your connection with your part-
ner. “If two people are attending to the same
rhythm,” Safron says, “you could get synchro-
nization across their nervous systems.” That
can lead to an increased ability to commu-
nicate with your partner—like making eye
contact across a room and seemingly reading
each other’s minds. “You’ll see this in armies
marching together, in dance partners, and in
musicians who play duets—they all develop
this intimacy,” Safron says. “Literally, as a
mechanism, their systems might sync up. This
allows them to be closer in a variety of ways.”
This underlines the sexual importance
of rhythms (so don’t go spelling the alphabet
with your tongue during cunnilingus; estab-
lishing a pleasing rhythm is more effective)
and attentiveness to your partner. It also
poses sex as a means to an altered state of con-
sciousness. And all this time, you thought it
was just about getting off.
“People have a bizarre doublethink around
sexuality,” Safron told me. “They think of it
as both unimportant and so important that it
causes terror in them.” A shift in perspective
can help you find a middle ground. Think of
sex as stimulation and it can get old; consider it
a strange trance state and you might find new
ways to enjoy it. “Recognize that sex is really
weird,” Safron says. “And appreciate that.”
I’m here to testify: He’s right. My journey
into the world of orgasm research not only
changed my mindset but also led to some of
the best sex of my life.
One night after my return from L.A., my
husband joined me in bed. I started kissing
him. We kissed for a long time—longer than
we ever would have before. To my surprise,
he seemed into it. In the past, I might have
worried we were spending too long on kiss-
ing, but now that fear seemed unfounded
and contrary to what I’d learned. Pleasure
was something to sink into, not race toward.
I resolved to simply enjoy the moment, quiet
my expectations, and try not to anticipate his.
It was a much slower build than I’d ever
experienced, and then something weird hap-
pened. The outside world faded away, leav-
ing the two of us behind. I was relaxed and
entranced, and I could tell he was too. Entrain-
ment had started to kick in. It led to literally
life-changing sex: I enjoyed all of it, not just
those last 20 seconds. (Sorry, I mean 21.)
Now even between-sex times are more
erotically charged. I have a new apprecia-
tion for the “welcome home” kiss and for
spontaneous touching and making out. And
because sex happens more often now, we’re
more likely to experiment (like scientists!);
a recent evening involved industrial music,
some loosely knotted scarves, and a blindfold.
It’s not like we’ve become sex maniacs. We
still have jobs. But we’re closer now. “I think
I love you more since we started having more
sex,” he kidded. There was truth in that too.
 XTREME JUSTICE LEAGUE, FROM P. 113

For guys like Pollak, the psychological
rewards of making an impact outweigh the
potential physical risks. “It’s a wonderful
feeling to help people,” says Robin Rosen-
berg, Ph.D., a clinical psychologist and the
editor of The Psychology of Superheroes. “If
you feel frustrated that people are vulnera-
ble, you can relieve some of that frustration
and feel like you’re having a direct impact
in a way that can protect others.”
There’s a self-contained quality shared
by almost every real-life superhero I spoke
with, an inner composure combined with
hard-core physical discipline that gets
externalized as a kind of “don’t fuck with
me” energy. No one personifies that more
than Phoenix Jones, even though his
approach is evolving to be more of a crime
stopper than fighter.
Like every superhero, Phoenix Jones has
a compelling origin story. He was inspired
to don the supersuit and fight crime after
his son slipped and badly cut himself on
broken glass from a car break-in. Fodor
wanted to prove to his boy that he could
impose order in a chaotic world.
Fodor’s first years as Phoenix Jones in
the early aughts were a comedy of errors.
He learned not to stand on top of build-
ings à la Batman, because it took too long
to run down stairs and stop the crimes he
observed. And Fodor realized his original
costume—a blue spandex bodysuit with
a sock cut in half for a mask, topped by a
fedora he says made him look like “Dark-
wing Duck’s black cousin”—was insuffi-
ciently protective. This discovery arrived
at the exact moment he confronted a serial
assailant who had been stabbing homeless
people around the Seattle-Tacoma area. “I
said, ‘Well, let’s just get to the point then,
3 miles in all. As he’s doing this, he silently STATEMENT OF OWNERSHIP,
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Editor: Matt Bean,
gear on my suit. Out here, I need six or seven 400 South 10th Street, Emmaus, PA 18098
Managing Editor: Melissa Jewsbury,
hours. It’s a different kind of gas tank.” 733 Third Avenue, New York, NY 10017
The creation of Phoenix Jones has 2. The owner is:
Rodale, Inc., 400 South 10th Street,
helped Fodor deal with his own personality. Emmaus, PA, 18098.
“I would fight no matter what. I would beat The stockholders thereof being, Rodale Family
Trusts – JP Morgan Trust Company as Trustee
people up no matter what. I have violent 3. The known bond holders, mortgagees, and other
security holders owning or holding 1 percent or
tendencies as a person,” he says. “Without more of total amount of bonds, mortgages,
or other securities: None
the rules that I made, without the mask
and without the symbol, I would be a very EXTENT AND Average no. of SEP 2017
NATURE OF copies each Single issue
different person.” Rosenberg, the clinical issue during nearest to
CIRCULATION preceding 12 mos. filing date
psychologist, sees it as someone knowing
their temperament and trying to channel A. TOTAL NO. COPIES
(Net Press Run) 2,258,888 2,215,552
it in an appropriate way. But his violent B. PAID CIRCULATION
approach has earned criticism from other 1. Mailed Paid
Subscriptions 1,334,292 1,312,054
real-life superheroes. After Phoenix Jones 3. Sales through
dealers and
was involved in a brawl with rowdy clubgo- carriers, street
vendors, counter
ers and used pepper spray a few years ago, sales, and other
paid 140,155 124,018
the Seattle police department announced it
C. TOTAL PAID
would restrict superheroes from “interfer- CIRCULATION
(Sum of B1 and B3) 1,474,447 1,436,072
ing with law enforcement operations”—an
D1, E. FREE
implicit rebuke to Jones. OR NOMINAL
RATE
Now he sees himself as more of a barrier DISTRIBUTION 283,292 342,164
between a criminal and a victim. “My job is F. TOTAL DISTRIBUTION
(Sum of C and E) 1,757,739 1,778,236
to maintain a buffer for five to 15 minutes
G. COPIES
until police can arrive,” says Fodor. “I don’t NOT DISTRIBUTED
SINGLE COPY
necessarily fight crime. I’m an excellent NOT DISTRIBUTED 490,736 439,947
witness. How many dudes have I punched, OTHER
NOT DISTRIBUTED 10,413 -2,631
hands up, and put into a jail cell? Zero. But
H. TOTAL
how many dudes have gone to jail because (Sum of F, and G) 2,258,888 2,215,552

shall we?’” recalls the hero. “I was still I have a camera and a really, really good I. PERCENT PAID 83.88% 80.76%
ELECTRONIC
doing catchphrases then. I’m like, ‘Yeah, memory? I think it’s 373.” COPY CIRCULATION
that’s right bro, I just catchphrased you.’ He A. PAID ELECTRONIC
COPIES 96,859 94,377
just stabs me in the stomach.” Fodor says WHERE TO BUY B. TOTAL PAID PRINT
he knocked the assailant unconscious with COPIES + PAID
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a single punch to the face, and then Fodor bananarepublic. michaelkors.com saks.com COPIES 1,571,306 1,530,449
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In the intervening years, though, Fodor Bonobos
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To Boot New York
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has perfected a workout intended to aug- Burberry
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ment his heroic abilities. Every morning, Gap
gap.com RBT
tommy.com Electronic Copies) 84.72% 81.73%
TRNK
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he puts on a 25-pound weight vest and jogs Luigi Bianchi
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to get breakfast, alternately sprinting for shinola.com
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one minute and walking for three, covering

TECH DRONE ACTION!

GUI DE KILLER KICKS!

2018

HOT TOYS!

132
G R E AT E S T
CARS,
DRILLS,
M O T O R CYC L E S ,
SHOES,
S M A R T WAT C H E S ,
& MORE!

CAMILA MENDES
Rides a Zero DSR
motorcycle
 An expertly edited collection.
 Because THE PERFECT GIFT
BRINGS PEOPLE TOGETHER.
macys.com/gifts

1. HIP HOP: A CULTURAL ODYSSEY

Created for Macy’s. $40. WebID 5156363
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top: Clipse. $100. WebID 4886977. Caviarr Rhinestone.
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© 2017 COORS BREWING CO., GOLDEN, CO
 CON T EN TS
04 GADGETS

08 $50 GIFT GRID

Prop styling: Christopher Stone/Halley Resources (this page); wardrobe styling: Kat Lozhnikova/Art Dept., wardrobe assistant: Patrick Rammelkamp, prop styling: Faethgruppe, hair: Bridget Brager/The Wall Group, makeup: Kayleen McAdams/Starworks Artists,
manicure: Denise Bourne/The Rex Agency, production: Liz Komroy/3 Star Productions; Out From Under bodysuit, Vintage Levi’s shorts, Ambyr Childers jewelry, Lucky Brand bandana (cover); PETER KOMIEROWSKI (Tech Guide badge and icons throughout)

10 TOYS

12 TOOLS

14 $100 GIFT GRID

16 KITCHEN

17 $300 GIFT GRID

18 CARS MH
20 ADVENTURE

24 FITNESS

28 SMART HOME

YOUR ONE-STOP SHOP

MensHealth.com/giftguide

TECH
GUIDE

Edited by
MATT BEAN & BEN COURT

Cover and Camila Mendes

photographs by
TURE LILLEGRAVEN

Environmental product
photographs by
YASU + JUNKO
HOBIE SUPER SURFER
Modeled off the 1965 original, Contributors: AARON BIBLE,
this skateboard is carved from BRIAN BOYÉ, MICHAEL EASTER,
mahogany and maple, and it SEAN EVANS, PAUL KITA,
rolls smoothly thanks to steel JOHN LONSDALE, EBENEZER
trucks and urethane wheels. SAMUEL, TOM SAMILJAN,
$220, hobie.com SAL VAGLICA, AND ANDREW YANG

MEN’S HEALTH Vol. 32, No. 10 (ISSN 1054-4836), is published 10 times per year (monthly except for January and July) by Rodale Inc., 400 South 10th St., Emmaus, PA 18098–0099; (800) 666-2303. Copyright 2017 by Rodale Inc. All rights
reserved. In U.S.: Periodicals postage paid at Emmaus, PA, and at additional mailing offices. Postmaster (U.S.): Send address changes to Men’s Health Customer Care, P.O. Box 3064, Harlan, IA 51593-0128. IN CANADA: Postage paid at
Gateway, Mississauga, Ontario; Canada Post International Publication Mail (Canadian Distribution) Sales Agreement No. 40063752. Postmaster (Canada): Send returns and address changes to Men’s Health magazine, P.O. Box 927, Stn Main,
Markham ON L3P 9Z9 (GST# R122988611). Subscribers: If the postal authorities alert us that your magazine is undeliverable, we have no further obligation unless we receive a corrected address within one year.

MensHealth.com / December 2017 3

 SUPER NINTENDO
ENTERTAINMENT
SYSTEM: SUPER NES
CLASSIC EDITION
A mini-me of the
iconic early ’90s
gaming console.
$80, nintendo.com

T ECH
LG SIGNATURE
OLED T V W-4K HDR
65" SMART T V
In a post-plasma
world, this
ultrathin monitor
is a must-have
for cinephiles
SECTION 01 PAGE 4 with cash to burn.

Denise Bourne/The Rex Agency, production: Liz Komroy/3 Star Productions (Mendes throughout); SAM KAPLAN (Nintendo, B&O, FujiFilm); The Row top, G Star Raw shorts, Ambyr Childers jewelry (opposite page)
$8,000, lg.com

Wardrobe styling: Kat Lozhnikova/Art Dept., wardrobe assistant: Patrick Rammelkamp, prop styling: Faethgruppe, hair: Bridget Brager/The Wall Group, makeup: Kayleen McAdams/Starworks Artists, manicure:
Innovation moves faster than life, B &O PLAY P2
but luckily we have all the latest It’s easily
stuffed into the
mind-bending gadgets right here front compartment
to help you keep up. Can you say, of any carry-on
and will belt out
YesWOWIgottahaveit? superb acous-
tics for up to 10
hours on a single
charge. $169,
beoplay.com

FUJIFILM X-E3
The rangefinder
is the original
mirrorless
camera; this one
brings 4K video
and does pretty
much everything
a Leica does at
a fraction of
the price. $900,
fujifilmusa.com
LIGHT L16 ROLAND GO:KEYS MH
The 16 modules Stream audio
on this device are and songs from
unsettling, but your smartphone
the quality of its and create unique
low-light 52- loops, or just,
megapixel shots you know, play
rivals a DSLR’s. the piano. $300,
$1,950, light.co roland.com

TECH
GUIDE
 APPLE IPHONE X
Apple fans will
like the retro
design paired
with a new OLED
screen and a pow-
erful dual-lens
camera for gor-
geous portraits,
especially if you
look like this.
$999, apple.com

YOUR GUIDE

Camila
Mendes
Playing Veronica
Lodge on the CW’s
Riverdale has made
Mendes appreciate
technology. She
films in Vancouver
10 months a year;
without FaceTime,
she says, she’d
feel isolated
from family and
friends. She also
uses apps like
Headspace and Nike
Training Club to
stay fit mentally
and physically.
 SECTION 01

SAMSUNG
NOTE8
MASTER & DYNAMIC BOWERS AND Samsung’s flagship
MW60 WILKINS PX Galaxy smartphone
Few wireless (and These next-gen noise- comes with its
lambskin!) headphones canceling headphones own pen, a 6.3-inch
deliver such pure, activate when you put display, and
clean depth of sound them on and turn them- 12-megapixel rear
and last 16 hours on selves off when you dual cameras. Plus,
one charge. $549, remove them. $399, you can add up to
masterdynamic.com bowers-wilkins.com 256 GB of storage.
$930, samsung.com

Prop styling: Christopher Stone/Halley Resources (environmental product photography throughout)

MH

TECH
GUIDE

MICROSOF T
SURFACE LAPTOP
Impressive specs:
a fast i5 or i7
processor, up to
16 GB of RAM, and
14.5-hour bat-
tery life. $999,
microsoft.com

REGA PLANAR 3
British turn-
table specialist
Rega Research
is powering the
vinyl revival
with sleek,
easy-setup rigs
that bring your
favorite LPs to
life. $1,145,
planar.co.uk

6 MensHealth.com / December 2017

 FITBIT IONIC.

B U I LT F O R

FITNESS.
M A D E F O R YO U.

P E R S O N A L R E C O R D S D O N ’ T S TA N D A C H A N C E

W I T H T H E A L L - N E W F I T B I T I O N I C F E AT U R I N G

I N D U S T R Y- L E A D I N G G P S , E N H A N C E D H E A R T R AT E

S E N S O R , A U T O M AT I C R U N T R A C K I N G A N D A

C U S T O M S T R AVA E X P E R I E N C E .
USE.
USE
US
TH U
WIT
WI
SW SE
S E.

PERSONALIZED I N D U S T R Y- STORE & WAT E R PHONE- POPULAR U P TO 5 DAY

ES
RIE

COAC H I N G LEADING P L AY 3 0 0 + R E S I S TA N T FREE APPS & B AT T E R Y

VARI
ARI
VAR
AR
VA
A

GPS SONGS TO 50M P AY M E N T S N OT I F I C AT I O N S LIFE

BATTE
ATTE
TTE
ATT
TT
AT
BA
BAT TE
T LIF
LI
RY L
ERY FE V
IIF

T H E S M A R T WAT C H D E S I G N E D F O R F I T N E S S
F I T B I T. C O M / I O N I C
 DON’T MISS OUT:
GRAB A BARGAIN
SECTION 02
Finally, stuff under $50 that isn’t junk. Here’s a little something for everyone (including you).
MILWAUKEE TICK
Attach this tracker to items
the neighbors borrow. Your
smartphone will keep ’em hon-
est. $29, milwaukeetool.com
ARTNATURALS OIL DIFFUSER
Just add water and an essen-
tial oil, and let the Blue-
tooth provide the soothing
tunes. $39, artnaturals.com
MOJIHEAT MASSAGE BALL 4"
More hot stuff! This massage
device warms up, helping
you roll out aches and
tension. $40, gomoji.com
8 MensHealth.com / December 2017
CONAIR I-STUBBLE
With 15 settings, it’ll
trim whatever’s sprouting
from your chin, nose,
or ears. $50, conair.com
OXO 3-IN-1 AVOCADO SLICER
It pits! It slices! It keeps
you from slicing and dicing
your palm! If only it could
make guacamole. $10, oxo.com
NOTNEUTRAL VERO GLASSES
Double-duty glassware:
These can hold your cortado
by day and your bourbon by
night. $18, notneutral.com
KLYMIT PILLOW X
The X design positions and
cradles your head for opti-
mal comfort wherever you’re
sleeping. $25, klymit.com
POWERBALL 280 PRO
Turn this gyroscopic device
to boost your grip, forearm,
and shoulder strength. $55,
powerballs.com
GOOGLE HOME MINI
Your voice-activated assis-
tant streams music, checks
weather, and doesn’t argue.
$49, store.google.com
GIFT GRID
CRAFTSMAN SIDEWINDER 16 FT
A flat design keeps it from
toppling over like other
tape measures. Simply bril-
liant. $15, craftsman.com
YETI RAMBLER MUG
Hot stuff! Your camp coffee
stays steamy and perfect
in this 14-ounce stainless
steel mug. $25, yeti.com
5.11 TAC A2 GLOVES
Tough and gentle, these
synthetic leather gloves
have tactile fingertips.
$30, 511tactical.com
 INNOVATION LEXUS SAFETY SYSTEM+
If you have trouble seeing the deer, we can help. At Lexus,

THAT HELPS we’re constantly looking out for the driver. That’s why we create
advancements—like intelligent high-beam headlamps1—that

BRING OBSTACLES
help shine a light on obstacles in front of you. Better-informed
drivers get us closer to our ultimate vision: a world without
accidents. See more of our standard comprehensive safety

TO LIGHT. system2 at lexus.com/safety. Experience driver-first innovation.

Experience Amazing. lexus.com/safety | #Lexus

Options shown. Illustration is for conceptual purposes only and is not an actual representation of Lexus Safety System+. 1. Intelligent high beams operate at speeds above 25 mph. Factors such as a dirty
windshield, weather, lighting and terrain limit effectiveness, requiring driver to manually operate the high beams. See Owner’s Manual for additional limitations and details. 2. Drivers are responsible for
their own safe driving. Always pay attention to your surroundings and drive safely. System effectiveness is dependent on many factors including road, weather and vehicle conditions. See Owner’s Manual
for additional limitations and details. ©2017 Lexus
TOYS
SECTION 03 P A G E 10

Put away the Parcheesi: With new, advanced

drones, e-cars, and other smart playthings,
toddlers and tweens have funner stuff to do.

DJI SPARK DRONE

The size of a small
bird of prey, it
responds to hand
gestures and can
fly for 16 minutes.
It returns home
via GPS with
12mp photos and
1080p video.
$500, dji.com

MH
NINTENDO UBTECH JIMU
SWITCH ROBOT BUILDERBOT
This hybrid It comes with servo
console-handheld motors, infrared
plays new and sensors, and an app
retro games. you use to program
$300, nintendo.com its movements.
$99, bestbuy.com

TESLA MODEL S
BY RADIO FLYER
TECH
Toddlers rejoice! GUIDE
Burn corners at a
blazing 6 mph for
an hour! $499,
radioflyer.com
Overtime victories.
Delivered to us safely in boxes.

Boxes protect so many of our favorite things as they journey

to stores and our front doors. They make electronics easy to
transport, protect our food and are some of the most recycled
products on the planet. Recycle your boxes so they’ll be put
to more good uses. howlifeunfolds.com

© 2017 Paper and Packaging Board. From the Makers of Paper and Packaging
 CAMILA
ON TECH TOOLS
BAREBONE S LIVING
PULASKI AXE
A steel core runs through
the beech handle to secure a
3-pound carbon steel head.
Use the head’s grub hoe to
cut roots, dig trenches,
and lever rocks. The base
pommel is for hammering.
$135, barebonesliving.com
 RYOBI 10 IN DUAL DEWALT FLEXVOLT MILWAUKEE
BEVEL SLIDING 60V MAX PACKOUT
MITER SAW CHAIN SAW Click-on totes and
Two 18-volt power The 16-inch bar organizers hold
packs give you rips through wood small stuff; the
all-day cutting with little kick- deep ones swallow
from this 34-pound back, and a charge up the tools. From
beast. $300, lasts two hours. $30, milwaukee
ryobitools.com $350, dewalt.com tool.com

TO OLSSECTION 04 PAGE 13

Powerful batteries, smart design, and lightweight components make that

home-improvement job easier and a helluva lot more enjoyable.

SOG BATON Q3 DYSON V7 BOSCH FLEXI-

SAM KAPLAN (SOG Baton, Bosch); The Gap tank, Marlies Dekkers bikini bottom, Ambyr Childers jewelry, Dsquared2 boots (opposite page)

Soldiers and CAR+BOAT CLICK 5-IN-1

civilians alike With six different The head pops off
will appreciate cleaning tools, so you can click
this 6-ounce this handheld on attachments,
device’s 13 tools, devours popcorn, like a right-angle
especially the confetti, and tool for awkward
pliers and blade. other evidence. spots. $200,
$94, sogknives.com $240, dyson.com boschtools.com

MH

TECH
GUIDE
 GREAT GEAR
ON A BUDGET
SECTION 05
Remember your friends, your family, and yourself: Most of this cool stuff is in the $100 range.
GORE FUSION RUNNING
It’s breathable and light-
weight, and the flat seams
reduce chafing as you run.
$110, goreapparel.com
CUISINART PREP EXPRESS
No more bloody knuckles:
Shred vegetables for salad,
stir-fry, and pasta in sec-
onds. $70, cuisinart.com
REEBOK COMBAT NOBLE
These hybrid cross-trainers
deliver increased ankle
stability without excess
bulk. $120, reebok.com
14 MensHealth.com / December 2017
VELOMACCHI SPEEDWAY
ROLL Handy for any tinkerer:
a portable kit to stash and
carry your essential tools.
$75, velomacchi.com
FINEX 15" LEAN GRILL PAN
Spreads the burner’s heat
over its surface to sear big
cuts like prime rib and rack
of lamb. $125, finexusa.com
BOSE SOUNDLINK MICRO
Hook this waterproof wire-
less speaker onto a backpack
and blast tunes for up to
six hours. $110, bose.com
SPARKR FLASHLIGHT
& LIGHTER One end houses
an electric plasma lighter;
the other is a flashlight.
$60, powerpractical.com
THE BOLLÉ MESSENGER
A light-bulb moment: Intro-
ducing a helmet with a built-
in LED to keep you visible.
From $100, bolle.com
BODYBREW B OD EXPERIENCE
This hourglass-shaped brewer
works like a tea steeper
to make diesel cold-brew
coffee. $69, bodybrew.com
GIFT GRID
HOKA ONE ONE HUPANA
Finally, an ultralight
running shoe that doesn’t
cut corners on cushioning.
$115, hokaoneone.com
TRIGGERPOINT GRID VIBE
Your muscles will thank
you: An onboard battery makes
this roller vibrate like
crazy. $100, tptherapy.com
TREW DIPPED MERINO T
An 85/15 blend of merino wool
and nylon makes this shirt
worthy of trail and gym
alike. $68, trewgear.com
THE NEW VENTRIX JACKET
RELEASES EXCESS BODY
H E AT S O Y O U C A N P E R F O R M
A T Y O U R B E S T.

TM
 KITCHENAID
BLACK TIE
STAND MIXER
How Jay-Z whips up
his bread dough and
homemade pasta.
Maybe. $1,000,
kitchenaid.com

MH

3
TECH
GUIDE

HUB
A grill that
marries a charcoal
fire with a spit.
$TBD, everdure
byheston.com

1. SMITH & 2. QUALIT Y EATS 3. PERCEVAL 888

WOLLENSKY They look like Svelte, like a
These burly slim daggers. slim pocketknife.
blades are tough Their handles are For fine dining,
enough to cleave a made from zebra- not Boy Scout
tomahawk rib eye. wood. Exotic. camp. $679 for 2,
$125 for 4, smith $50 for 4, perceval-
andwollensky.com qualityeats.com knives.co.uk

KITCHEN
MIIR 64 OZ
GROWLER
Medical-grade
stainless steel
holds the cold
all day (at least).
$59, miir.com

SECTION 06 P A G E 16

Don’t mutilate that perfectly seared steak with a low-quality knife.

Trust these blades used by butchers and steakhouses.
 BURN SOME
OF YOUR BONUS!
SECTION 07
High-performance gear that you’ll still be using for many holidays to come.
NIKE REACT HYPERDUNK
A base of Nike’s newest foam
offers a springy sensation
even if your game isn’t above
the rim. $160, nike.com
5.11 TACTEC PLATE CARRIER
Insert weight plates into the
vest. CrossFit Games athletes
wear the 20-pound version.
$200, 511tactical.com
SAM KAPLAN (Roka)
LEVI’S COMMUTER
TRUCKER JACKET WITH
JACQUARD BY GOOGLE
Technology woven in. Tap
cuff, rock on. $350, levi.com
OAKLEY FALL LINE PRIZM
The rimless design affords
better peripheral vision on
the mountain and après in the
hot tub. $190, oakley.com
INSTANT POT ULTRA 10-IN-1
An XXL version of the culi-
nary phenom. Tender short
ribs for 20 in under an hour?
Done. $150, surlatable.com
SONICARE DIAMONDCLEAN
Never miss a spot with a smart
brush that uses an app to
track where you’re cleaning.
From $230, shop.philips.com
ROKA FALCON TI
Stealth sports shades: No-
slip nose pads, Carl Zeiss
lenses, featherweight tita-
nium frame. $260, roka.com
BABOLAT PURE AERO PLAY
A sensor measures your
power, stroke, and strike
location and connects to
an app. $349, babolat.com
INOV-8 PARKCLAW 275 GTX
This trail runner has the
latest Gore-Tex and an 8mm
drop from heel to toe to mimic
barefootin’. $150, inov8.com
MensHealth.com / December 2017
GIFT GRID
ONNIT STAR WARS
Defeat the force (of gravity)
with these unique 50-, 60-,
and 70-pound kettlebells.
From $150, onnit.com
ARC’TERYX INCENDO
Stay dry with this 4.6-ounce
weather-resistant shell.
It compresses to hacky sack
size. $140, arcteryx.com
SAMSUNG GEAR ICON X
Bored in the wilderness?
Cord-free buds hold 4 GB
of music on a six-plus-hour
charge. $200, samsung.com
17
 3

7 8

SECTION 08 P A G E 18

CARS
You name it—speed,
ruggedness, style,
power—these rides
have what you want.

1. FERRARI 488 2. BUICK REGAL 3. GENESIS G80 4. PORSCHE

GTB A 3.9-liter TOUR X Sporty 5.0 Value meets PANAMERA 4S
Eddie Bauer shirt, All Saints shorts, Lucky Brand boots

V8 powers her and stylish, this luxury: 420 hp, A four-seater

from zero to 124 AWD wagon has a 5.0-liter V8, that sprints to
in 8.3 seconds. spacious 33-cubic- leather seats. 60 in 4 seconds.
From $351,283, foot trunk. From From $57,000, From $99,900,
ferrari.com $29,995, buick.com genesis.com porsche.com

5. HONDA CIVIC 6. McLAREN 570S 7. MERCEDE S-AMG 8. CHEVROLET

T YPE R Front- SPIDER Blaze to C 43 A handsome CAMARO ZL1
wheel-drive, 306- 60 in 3.1 seconds sedan with a feral The ZL1 uses the
horsepower, six- in this 562-horse- 3-liter V6 that same 6.2-liter V8
speed-manual fun. power soft-top. growls and barks. as the Corvette!
From $33,900, From $208,800, From $53,400, From $63,795,
honda.com cars.mclaren.com mbusa.com chevrolet.com
 MH

JEEP GRAND
CHEROKEE
TRACKHAWK
A 6.2-liter,
707-horsepower
V8 fires this
rocket to 60 in
3.5 seconds. From
$85,900, jeep.com
TECH
GUIDE

THE BEST
INNOVATIONS
New tech will help
you drive faster,
farther, and safer.

1. PORSCHE
INNODRIVE
It’s a cruise
control system
that utilizes
3D mapping
from car and
satellite data
to modulate
the throttle
and brake.

2. CADILLAC
SUPER CRUISE
This hands-
free highway
driver aid
system uses
a camera atop
the steering
column to track
your head
position for
steering.

3. MERCEDES-BENZ
FIT & HEALTHY
A cool system
of sensors that
can custom-
ize your cabin
experience to
keep you calm
and pain-free
as you drive.

4. BMW GESTURE
CONTROL
Simple
gestures can
activate some
interface
screens, which
means less
fumbling and
more focusing
on the road.
 CAMILA ON FITNESS

“ Invest in a trainer. You see the

progress so quickly, and you
push yourself in new ways.”

ORU KAYAK
BEACH LT
Fold this
25-pound craft
into its carry
pack, hike to the
water, and paddle
on. $1,299,
orukayak.com
K2 B.F.C. 100 HEAT
These ski boots
are designed to
make standing and
walking easier.
Thermic heat lin-
ers and a relaxed MH
“après mode” make
them comfortable
between runs.
$700, k2skis.com

THE NORTH FACE

VENTRIX HOODIE
High-sweat zones
feature laser-
cut perforations TECH
that expand and GUIDE
contract to regu-
late your core
temperature and
sweat output. $220,
thenorthface.com

COLE HAAN +
MOUNTAIN
HARDWEAR
GRADEXPLØRE
PARKA
When two iconic
brands team up,
you get extreme
weather protec-
tion that looks
sharp. $700,
colehaan.com

ADVENTURE
KAMMOK
THYLACINE
This bag has
multiple layers
that you can add
or shed for just-
right insulation.
$229 to $528,
kammok.com
SECTION 09 PAGE 21

When the great outdoors call, how will you answer? Gear up and
get out there with the finest pieces of equipment we could find.

ONEWHEEL+
Roll to work at
19 mph on this
self-balancing
2-horsepower
board. As you do,
note the world’s
jealousy. $1,499,
onewheel.com

BLACK DIAMOND
MOMENTUM
CLIMBING SHOES
The comfortable
upper breathes
as well as you do
on a rock face.
$90, blackdiamond
equipment.com
 SECTION 09

GMC SIERRA
ALL-TERRAIN X
V8, 4WD, and
underbody
shield? Hell yes.
From $67,670,
gmc.com
DANNER FEATHER
LITE 917
The ’80s classic,
made better
with Gore-Tex
and a rubberized
EVA midsole.
$240, danner.com

MH

TECH
GUIDE

FRANCO

SAM KAPLAN (K2); Alexander Wang T-shirt, BDG shorts, Ray-Ban sunglasses, Ambyr Childers jewelry, H&M socks, The North Face boots (previous spread)
SNOWSHAPE S
Customize your
snowboard to your
riding style.
$1,800, franco
snowshapes.com

K2 SIMPLE
PLEASURES
Lively turns
on any terrain.
$650, k2snow
boarding.com

JONES
STORM CHASER
Float in powder
and enjoy next-
level carving.
$600, jones
snowboards.com

TENTSILE HYPERLITE
STINGRAY SUMMIT PACK
TREE TENT The ripstop fabric
This first-in- is lighter than
kind tripod tent nylon and stron-
sleeps three of ger than Kevlar,
your friends and the design
suspended above is beautifully
the undesirables basic. $175,
down below. $650, hyperlite
tentsile.com mountaingear.com

22 MensHealth.com / December 2017

 THINK ABOUT
WHISPERING TREES.
DON’T THINK ABOUT
WEATHER PROTECTION.
DON’T THINK ABOUT
GORE-TEX ® . PRODUCTS

ZERO DSR
New higher-temp
magnets in the
Z-Force electric
motor create
116 lb-ft of
torque and 70
horses without
a single drop
of gas. Now that’s
what we call
progress. From
$15,995, zero
motorcycles.com

DRY®, GORE® and designs are trademarks of W. L. Gore & Associates, Inc.
© 2017 W. L. Gore & Associates, Inc. GORE-TEX®, GUARANTEED TO KEEP YOU
Out From Under bodysuit, Vintage Levi’s shorts, Ambyr Childers jewelry, Lucky Brand bandana, Frye boots (opposite page)

POC ASPIRE 100% SPEEDCRAF T

Minimalist Scandavian
design applied to
Designed in Cali, made
in Italy, and favored
THE MORE WE CARE
sunglasses. The nose
pads stay grippy
by cycling stud Peter
Sagan. The lenses
ABOUT YOU, THE LESS
and the Carl Zeiss
lenses enhance
refract light away from
your eyes so you see
YOU THINK ABOUT US.
contrast. From $220, every pothole. $220, Nothing protects you like
pocsports.com ride100percent.com
GORE-TE X ® products.

gore-tex.com/think
CANYON AEROAD 3T STRADA
CF SLX DISC 8.0 DI2 The best of a road
High quality bike (lightweight
at a low price; frame), cyclocross
this German road (wider tires),
bike has disc triathlon (aero-
brakes and carbon dynamic tubes),
fiber wheels. and mountain bike
From $1,500, (seven gears).
canyon.com $4,000, 3t.bike/en
 FITNESS SECTION 10 P A G E 25

It’s that time of year—and you’ll soon be working off those

holiday pounds. Let these cool new products help you along.

APPLE WATCH
SERIE S 3
It gets better
still, unleashed
from the phone and
streaming music.
$400, apple.com

GARMIN
VIVOACTIVE 3
Speed, distance,
and heart rate are
presented clearly
and are super easy
to share. $300,
garmin.com

FITBIT IONIC
The new model has
GPS, a heart-rate
monitor, stores
music, and tracks
your well-earned
sleep. $300,
fitbit.com

SUUNTO SPARTAN
SPORT WRIST HR
This adventure
classic now has
better GPS and
a built-in heart-
rate monitor.
$500, suunto.com

MH

TECH
GUIDE
 SECTION 10

ADIDAS
FUTURECRAF T 4D
A process called
digital light
synthesis creates
the funky mesh
sole for a firm,
responsive ride.
$300, adidas.com

RPM COMP
JUMP ROPE
Knurled aluminum
handles provide
a secure grip so
SAM KAPLAN (watches, Theragun, Taylormade)

you can focus on

your form. $63,
rpm training.com

THERAGUN G2PRO HAYABUSA T3 TAYLORMADE

The pulsing head Your fists and M1 460
is a power tool wrists are pro- Sliding weights
for your muscles, tected by inner adjust the face
relaxing tight foam and splints; angle so you can
fibers and ten- the lining KOs bomb confidently.
dons. $600, bacteria. $100, $500, taylor
theragun.com hayabusafight.com madegolf.com

26 MensHealth.com / December 2017

60 YEARS OF ADVENTURE
AND DISCOVERY
 NEST CAM IQ
The 4K security
camera can recog-
MH nize someone and
send you a “famil-
iar face” alert.
Answering the
door is your call.
$299, nest.com

GOOGLE CLIPS
Clip it anywhere
that gives you a
good view and snap
TECH
three- to six-
GUIDE
second motion
photos to edit
and share. $249,
store.google.com
AMAZON
ECHO SHOW LG PROBEAM
Make video calls, LASER SMART
check who’s at HOME THEATER
your front door, PROJECTOR
watch streaming HF80JA
video, all via This little
voice command. monster blasts a
$230, amazon.com 120-inch picture
in full HD 1080p.
$1,500, lg.com

SECTION 11 PAGE 28

SMART HOME
Home upgrades can be satisfying—not because they’re so cool (well,
DYSON PURE
HOT+ COOL LINK
A triple threat:
a heater, a power-
ful air purifier,
and a cooling fan
there’s that), but because they make your home more fun to live in. you can control
via an app. $600,
dyson.com
SAM KAPLAN (Nest, Google, LG); Stella McCartney bikini (opposite page)

AWAIR AIR
QUALIT Y TRACKER
This genius will
alert you through
an app when it
detects toxins
and allergens in
your space. $199,
getawair.com

VITAMIX A2500
A food-mashing
2.2-horsepower
engine, plus smart
sensors that can
detect the con-
tainer size. $520,
vitamix.com
SONOS ONE
It’s a sleek voice-controlled
smartspeaker that has Alexa on
board and can play music from
most apps, including Spotify
and Pandora. Be warned: It could
be your gateway device to more
powerful and expensive Sonos
speakers. $199, sonos.com

CAMILA ON HER
HAPPY PLACE

“ The sauna
at my gym.
I’ll meditate
in there for
about 20
minutes.”
 8
SECTION 11

SM A RT
12

HOM E 101 9
4

We tested more than 100 smart-home

gadgets to arrive at our ultimate list 5
of MH-approved devices. 7
14

Most smart-home solutions are 1 2

just plain dumb. If you’re not 15
burning hours configuring,
rebooting, or troubleshooting,
you’re fumbling with your phone
when the flip of a switch or turn
of a key would’ve been twice as 6

fast. But when a device delivers?

Well, you feel like you’ve conjured
11
up modern magic. Here’s the 13
10
ultimate litmus test for any con-
nected home device, along with
the 15 top products in five areas.

IS IT WORTH THE WORK? VING

LI
Smart devices shouldn’t just be DOES THE APP SUCK? CAN YOU CHEAT?

MH
parlor tricks. Is the ROI there? Can you pair quickly? Does the Let’s say you change your mind
You shouldn’t spend five hours app actually do anything other about Alexa or Google Home—or

S
connecting a bulb, but laying an than grab your email for spam any of the several hubs or stan-

in-ground cordon to guide a robo
mower isn’t bad next to getting
baked in the sun all summer.
barrages? When was it last
updated? Any dead ends? Hard-
ware is half the battle.
D
AWAR
dards. Will that fan bolted to
your ceiling follow your lead too? YOUR ONE-STOP SHOP
Flexibility is key. MensHealth.com/giftguide

HOME & FOOD &

DIFFICULT Y SECURIT Y A/V HVAC
GARDEN BEVERAGE

1. NEST CAM 2. SONOS ONE 3. CRAFTSMAN SMART 4. MOLEKULE 5. ANOVA PRECISION

IQ INDOOR The gold standard LOCK TOOL STORAGE AIR PURIFIER COOKER NANO
Unfamiliar faces in connected Approach and Slays mold and Sous vide is less
EASY send a pan-and- audio, now it unlocks; keeps airborne viruses than $100. If only
Plug, play, capture clip to with Alexa. logs of access. with high-tech Wagyu were too.
and swipe away. your phone. $199, From $330, filters. $800, (Due in spring.)
$299, nest.com sonos.com craftsman.com molekule.com $99, anova.com

6. MAXIMUS SMART 7. SCREEN 8. LUTRON SERENA 9. NEST 10. TRAEGER

SECURITY LIGHT INNOVATIONS SOLO SHADES W/ CASETA THERMOSTAT E TIMBERLINE 850
A porch lamp with Li-Ion powered, Connected and Next-gen learning This pellet smoker
MEDIUM video and inter- remote projection battery-powered thermostat, lets you check the
You’ll need a com. Genius. screen. From shades with top- $80 less than meat via an app.
drill or wrench. $180, maximus $1,600, screen notch controls. the original. $1,700, traeger
lighting.com innovations.com $460, lutron.com $169, nest.com grills.com

11. KWIKSET 12. iPORT LAUNCH- 13. WORX LANDROID 14. HAIKU LUXE 15. PICOBREW
OBSIDIAN PORT WALLSTATION ROBOTIC MOWER SERIES CEILING FAN PICO MODEL C
Touchscreen A magnetic wall Sip brews while Connected blades Beer here: Plug-
HARD deadbolt station houses this guy eats keep temp low; and-play setup
You’re basically with multiple and charges your turf. whir with a word for the aspiring
on the Geek Squad. passcodes. $179, tablet. $338, $1,000, to Alexa. $1,595, brewmaster. $549,
kwikset.com iportproducts.com worx.com haikuhome.com picobrew.com

30 MensHealth.com / December 2017 ILLUSTRATION BY L-DOPA