Gay Marriage: What's the Big Deal?

So, what’s the big deal? If two people love each other, shouldn’t they be allowed the same rights,
privileges and responsibilities, no matter their genders? Yet, marriage is so much greater than the
commitment of two people to each other. Marriage is an institution that much of our culture
revolves around. It is also an institution that is in crisis.

Divorce rates are at an all time high. Infidelity in marriage is an epidemic. When someone can
compete on a television reality show to “Marry a Millionaire”, the argument about saving a
sacred institution seems kind of pointless.

Gay Marriage and Children

And then there’s the whole issue of the children. Some argue that children are better off raised in
a male-female headed household. Whether there is truth to that argument or not, is not the point.
Many couples will marry and not have children: gay and straight. Gay and lesbian couples are
having children already without the benefit of marriage. So are single moms, teenagers and drug
addicts. Preventing a loving same sex couple from making a legal commitment to each other can
only hurt their children. It can send a message, like it did in the case of one Massachusetts
couple, that mommy and mommy don’t really love each other, because if they did, they would
get married. How do you explain the legal system to a five year old?

Some churches oppose same-sex marriage. Yet some, like the Unitarians and Metropolitan
Community Church, bless gay marriages and perform commitment ceremonies. The
Episcopalians are debating the issue right now. Whatever they decide does not and should not
matter. Separation of church and state is essential to the freedom we enjoy as Americans. It is
also the value our Constitution was based upon.

Most of the arguments against gay and lesbian marriage are flawed and reactionary. They are
reminiscent of the arguments against interracial marriages fifty years ago: that it will harm
children, send the wrong moral message and devalue the institution of marriage.

Most Americans, perhaps with the exception a few in white robes, will agree that the ban on
interracial marriages is nothing more than prejudice at work. Soon, we will look back at the
arguments against same-sex marriages and see, like the ban on interracial marriages, that they are
backed by nothing more than bigotry, prejudice and fear.

Tatlong quotes:

"Marriage between one man and one woman is critical to maintaining social stability.
Society as a whole pays a high price when marriage is devalued. You see divorce;
you see single-parenting; you see a rise in out-of-wedlock pregnancies." "Kasal sa
pagitan ng isang tao at isang babae ay kritikal na sa pagpapanatili ng panlipunang
katatagan. Lipunan bilang isang buong nagbabayad ng isang mataas na presyo
kapag ang kasal ay devalued. Ninyong makita ang diborsiyo; nakikita mo solong-
pagiging magulang; makita mo ang isang tumaas sa labas ng matrimonyo
pregnancies. " Shari Rendall, director of legislation and policy for Concerned Women
for America . 3 Shari Rendall, direktor ng mga batas at patakaran para sa Nababahala
Babae para sa Amerika. 3

"An unjust law is (one that a) majority group compels a minority group to obey but
does not make binding on itself. ... "Lamentably, it is an historical fact that privileged
groups seldom give up there privileges voluntarily." Martin Luther King, Jr. in a letter
from a Birmingham jail. "Ang isang hindi makatarungan ng batas ay (isa na a) grupo
ng mayorya compels isang grupo ng minorya upang sundin ngunit ay hindi gumawa
ng mga umiiral na sa kanyang sarili. ..." Lamentably, ito ay isang makasaysayang
katotohanan na privileged grupo bihira magbigay ng up may mga pribilehiyo ng
kusang-loob. "Martin Luther King, Jr sa isang sulat mula sa isang bilangguan
Birmingham.

"A loving man and woman in a committed relationship can marry. Dogs, no matter
what their relationship, are not allowed to marry. How should society treat gays and
lesbians in committed relationships? As dogs or as humans?" "Ang isang
mapagmahal na tao at babae sa isang committed na relasyon ay maaaring
magpakasal. Dogs, kahit ano ang kanilang relasyon, ay hindi pinahihintulutan na
magpakasal. Paano dapat ituring lipunan gays at lesbians sa ginawa ng mga
relasyon? Bilang dogs o bilang tao?" Anonymous posting to an Internet mailing list.
Anonymous pag-post sa isang mailing list sa Internet.

A ruling by the US Supreme Court in Griswold v Connecticut (1965): "Marriage is a

coming together for better or for worse, hopefully enduring, and intimate to the degree
of being sacred. It is an association that promotes a way of life, not causes; a
harmony in living, not political faiths; a bilateral loyalty, not commercial or social
projects. Yet it is an association for as noble a purpose as any involved in our prior
decisions." Ang pasya ng US kataas-taasang hukuman sa Griswold v Connecticut
(1965): "Kasal ay isang pagtatagpo para sa mas mahusay o para sa mas masahol pa,
sana ay pamalagian, at kilalang-kilala sa ang antas ng pagiging banal. Ito ay isang
samahan na nagtataguyod ng isang paraan ng pamumuhay, hindi nagiging sanhi ng;
isang pagkakasundo sa pamumuhay, hindi pampulitika faiths; isang bilateral
katapatan, hindi komersyal o panlipunang mga proyekto. Ngunit ito ay isang
kapisanan para sa bilang isang marangal na layunin ng anumang kasangkot sa aming
mga bago desisyon. "

More quotes showing the diversity of opinion for and against marriage for loving,
committed same-sex couples. Higit pang mga quotes na nagpapakita ng pagkakaiba-
iba ng opinyon para sa at laban sa pag-aasawa para sa mapagmahal, nakatuon-sex
Couples parehong.
Background : Background :

For some years, same-sex marriage (SSM) has been near or at the top of any list of leading
religious/secular/political controversies in North America. Para sa ilang mga taon, parehong-sex
kasal (SSM) ay malapit sa o sa itaas ng anumang mga listahan ng mga nangungunang relihiyon /
walang kaugnayan sa relihiyon / pampulitikang controversies sa North America. It is complex,
divisive, and not readily amenable to compromise. Ito ay mahirap unawain, naghahati, at hindi
kaagad palasunod sa pagbibigayan. After all, US states either allow SSM or ban it. Matapos ang
lahat, sa amin mga estado payagan ang alinman sa SSM o pagbawalan ito.

Any change, or threat of change, to the culture is distressing to many people. Anumang
pagbabago, o pagbabanta ng mga pagbabago, sa kultura ay kasakitsakit sa maraming mga tao.
But a change to the structure of the fundamental building block of society -- the family -- can be
particularly upsetting. Subalit isang pagbabago sa istruktura ng mga pangunahing gusali block ng
lipunan - ang pamilya - ay maaaring maging lalo na upsetting. Also, a change related to human
sexuality can be profoundly disorienting. Gayundin, ang isang pagbabago na may kaugnayan sa
pantao iyag ay maaaring profoundly disorienting.

SSM has split the US by: SSM ay nahati sa US sa pamamagitan ng:

 Age: Youth and young adults are generally for SSM; the elderly are against.
Edad: Kabataan at mga batang may gulang ay karaniwang para sa SSM; sa
mga matatanda ay laban.

 Political affiliation: Most democrats are in are favor, Independents less so,
Republicans opposed . Pampulitika kaakibat: Karamihan sa mga democrats ay
sa mga pabor, Independents mas mababa sa gayon, Republicans laban.

 Religion: Conservatives are opposed; religious liberals/progressives and

secularists are for. Relihiyon: Conservatives ay tutol; relihiyon liberals /
progressives at secularists ay para sa.

 Geography: The northeast is supportive; the west coast is about evenly split; the
rest is against. Heograpiya: hilagang-silangan ay supportive; ang kanluran
baybayin ay tungkol sa pantay-pantay split; pahinga ay laban.

Most American adults currently oppose SSM, except in about ten states and the District of
Columbia. Karamihan sa mga Amerikanong may-edad sa kasalukuyan tutulan SSM, maliban sa
mga tungkol sa sampung mga estado at ang Distrito ng Columbia. However, the trend is towards
increasing acceptance . If current trends continue, most American adults who have an opinion on
the topic will be supportive of SSM sometime in the 2010's. Gayunman, ang mga kalakaran ay
tungo sa pagtaas ng pagtanggap . Kung ang mga kasalukuyang mga uso magpatuloy, pinaka-
Amerikano may-edad na magkaroon ng isang opinyon sa mga paksa ay supportive ng SSM
minsan sa 2010's.
LivingVote.org has followed the debate over Proposition 8 in California, which terminated SSM
in that state. LivingVote's visitors have posted three arguments for and three against SSM which
seem to reflect Americans' main concerns: LivingVote.org ay sinundan ang debate sa paglipas ng
Panukala 8 sa California, na tinapos sa SSM na estado. LivingVote ang mga bisita ay may nai-
post ng tatlong argumento para at laban sa tatlong SSM na tila upang sumalamin sa Amerikano
'pangunahing pag-aalala:
Arguments for SSM Argumento para sa
SSM
Dignity & respect: "The institution of
marriage conveys dignity and respect
towards a couple that make a lifetime
commitment to support each other. "Same-
sex couples deserve this dignity and
respect." Karangalan at paggalang: "Ang
mga institusyon ng kasal conveys
karangalan at paggalang sa isang pares na
gumawa ng isang buhay na pangako sa
suporta sa bawat isa."-Sex Couples Same
maging karapat-dapat na ito karangalan at
paggalang. "
Equal rights: Denying marriage to same-
sex couples removes from one group a
fundamental, important human right -- the
right to marry the person that one loves
and to whom one has made a commitment.
Pantay na karapatan: pagtangging
sumampalataya kasal sa parehong-sex
Couples nagtanggal mula sa isang grupo
ng isang pangunahing, mahahalagang tao
karapatan - ang karapatang magpakasal
ang tao na ang isa loves at kanino ang isa
ay ginawa ng isang pangako. That is unfair
and unjust in a democracy. Iyan ay hindi
makatarungan at hindi makatarungan sa
isang demokrasya.
Arguments against SSM Argumento
laban sa SSM
Religious freedom: For most Americans,
marriage is a religious sacrament or
ceremony. Relihiyoso kalayaan: Para sa
karamihan ng Amerikano, pag-aasawa ay
isang relihiyosong sakramento o
seremonya. If the definition of marriage is
changed to allow SSM, some religious
individuals and groups feel that they will
become at risk of having to violate their
beliefs by being forced to marry same-sex
couples. Kung ang kahulugan ng kasal ay
binago upang payagan ang SSM, ang ilang
mga relihiyosong mga indibidwal at mga
grupo ng pakiramdam na sila ay maging sa
panganib ng pagkakaroon na lumalabag sa
kanilang paniniwala sa pamamagitan ng
pagiging sapilitang upang magpakasal-sex
Couples parehong.
Children benefit: Many religiously
conservative researchers have found that
children thrive best when reared in a home
with a married mother and father. Bata
benepisyo: Maraming relihiyon na
konserbatibo mga mananaliksik ay
natagpuan na mga bata lumago
pinakamahusay na kapag reared sa isang
bahay na may isang asawa ina at ama.
Boys and girls have needs that are
uniquely met by parents of the opposite
gender. Boys at batang babae na may mga
pangangailangan na katangi-tangi ay
nakilala sa pamamagitan ng mga
magulang ang kabaligtaran kasarian.
Financial & security: Denying one group
the right to marry has many adverse
emotional and financial consequences.
Teaching about SSM: The role of
Financial & seguridad: pagtangging
marriage in society is a major topic taught
sumampalataya isang grupo ng
in public schools. Pagtuturo tungkol sa
karapatang-asawa ay may maraming mga
SSM: Ang papel na ginagampanan ng
emosyonal na masama at pinansiyal na
kasal sa lipunan ay isang pangunahing
kahihinatnan. Examples are Social
paksa tinuturuan sa mga pampublikong
Security, Medicare, medical leave, and
paaralan. If SSM is legalized, schools
other benefits; property inheritance; the
would be required to teach that same-sex
right to visit their spouse in hospital, and
marriage is equivalent to opposite-sex
make medical decisions if they are
marriage, starting as early as Kindergarten.
incapacitated; security of the couple and of
Kung SSM ay legalisado, ang mga
their children. Halimbawa ay Social
paaralan ay kinakailangan upang magturo
Security, Medicare, medikal na umalis, at
na parehong-sex kasal ay katumbas ng
iba pang benepisyo; ari-arian ng mana; ang
kabaligtaran-sex kasal, simula nang maaga
karapatan upang bisitahin ang kanilang
bilang kindergarten. That would violate the
asawa sa ospital, at gumawa ng mga
beliefs of many parents. Iyon ay lalabag sa
medikal na desisyon kung sila ay
paniniwala ng maraming mga magulang.
incapacitated; seguridad ng ilang at ng
kanilang mga anak.

SSM ay isang mahirap na paksa upang talakayin dahil:

 Different groups assign different meanings to commonly used words. Iba't-ibang

mga grupo ng magtalaga ng iba't-ibang kahulugan sa karaniwang ginagamit na
salita.

 There is heavy emotional baggage associated with some terms, particularly

when used by some groups. May mabigat na emosyonal na bagahe na kaugnay
sa ilang mga kataga, lalo na kapag ginagamit ng ilang mga grupo.

Advocacy groups often prefer to use positive terms to describe their position.
Pagtatanggol mga grupo ng madalas na ginustong gamitin na positibong mga kataga
na naglalarawan sa kanilang mga posisyon. Thus, gay-positive groups often say that
they are seeking "marriage equality." Kaya, gay-positive mga grupo ng madalas na
sinasabi na sila ay naghahanap ng "kasal na pagkakapantay-pantay." Religious and
social conservatives often refer to preserving "traditional marriage," "historical marriage"
and say that they are "pro-marriage." Relihiyosong at panlipunan conservatives
madalas sumangguni sa pagpepreserba "tradisyunal na kasal," "makasaysayang kasal"
at sabihin na sila ay "pro-aasawa."
For example: Halimbawa:

Terms: Homosexual, gay, lesbian, bisexual... Kasunduan: homosexual, gay, lesbian,

bisexual ...

Many human sexuality researchers, therapists, etc. consider "homosexual" to be

an emotionally neutral term that refers to individuals who are sexually attracted only
to members of the same gender. It refers to one of three morally neutral, normal,
natural, and fixed (or nearly always fixed) sexual orientations among adults.
Maraming mga tao iyag mga mananaliksik, therapists, atbp isaalang-alang ang
"homosexual" na maging isang damdamin neutral na kataga ay tumutukoy sa mga
indibidwal na mga sekswal na akit lamang sa mga kasapi ng parehong kasarian. Ito
ay tumutukoy sa isa sa tatlong sa kagandahang-asal walang kinikilingan, normal na,
natural, at nakapirming (o halos palaging fixed) sexual orientations sa mga may
gulang na. The other two orientations are heterosexual and bisexual. Ang iba pang
dalawang mga orientations ay heterosexual at bisexual.

Many religious and social conservatives consider "homosexual" to be a very

negative term -- often a snarl word -- that refers to individuals who have sex with
members of the same gender. Maraming mga relihiyon at panlipunan
conservatives isaalang-alang ang "homosexual" ay isang napaka-negatibong
termino - madalas isang singhal salita - na tumutukoy sa mga indibidwal na may sex
sa mga kasapi ng parehong kasarian. They see it as immoral, abnormal, unnatural,
and changeable behavior among adults that is condemned by God and by the Bible.
makita nila ito bilang masama, abnormal, hindi katutubo, at maiiba na pag-uugali sa
mga may-edad na ay nahatulan ng Diyos at ng Biblia.

A very few religiously conservative groups teach that there are about 30, not 3, sexual
orientations -- including bestiality (having sex with animals); necrophilia (having sex
with dead bodies); pedophilia (sexually abusing pre-pubertal children), etc. They
argue that any law that forbids discrimination against persons because of their sexual
orientation will actually protect pedophiles, necrophiles, etc. A few politicians have
picked up this idea and referred to the federal hate crimes bill as a "pedophile
protection bill." Ang isang tunay ilang mga relihiyon na konserbatibo grupo magturo na
may tungkol sa 30, hindi 3, sexual orientations - kabilang ang kalupitan (sa
pagkakaroon ng sex sa mga hayop); necrophilia (sa pagkakaroon ng sex sa patay
katawan); pedophilia (sekswal abusing pre-pubertal mga bata), atbp Sila magtaltalan
na ang anumang batas na forbids diskriminasyon laban sa mga tao dahil sa kanilang
sexual orientation ay talagang protektahan pedophiles, necrophiles, atbp Ang ilang
mga pulitiko na pumili ng up ang ideya na ito at tinutukoy sa mga pederal na krimen
bayarin galit bilang isang "proteksyon pedophile kuwenta." This unique definition of
sexual orientation has not been widely accepted. Ang natatanging kahulugan ng
sexual orientation ay hindi pa malawak na tinanggap.
 Persons with a homosexual or bisexual orientation often describe themselves as gay, lesbian,
or bisexual. Mga taong may isang homosexual o bisexual orientation madalas ilarawan ang
kanilang sarili bilang gay, lesbian, o bisexual. But to some, the terms "gay" and "lesbian" also
imply being actively involved in political action to promote SSM and equality of rights and
protections for persons of all sexual orientations. Subalit sa ilang, ang mga kataga "gay" at
"lesbian" din magpahiwatig pagiging aktibong kasangkot sa pampulitikang pagkilos upang
itaguyod ang SSM at pagkakapantay-pantay ng karapatan at proteksyon para sa mga taong ng
lahat ng sekswal orientations. Many lesbians and gay dislike the term homosexual because it is
so often used as a snarl word. Maraming lesbians at gay hindi nagugustuhan ang mga kataga
ng homosexual dahil ito ay kaya madalas na ginagamit bilang isang singhal salita.

On this website , we define the terms homosexual, gay, lesbian, heterosexual, and
bisexual in the same way that human sexuality researchers do. Sa website na ito, kami
ay tukuyin ang mga kataga homosexual, gay, lesbian, heterosexual, bisexual at sa
parehong paraan na pantao iyag mga mananaliksik gawin. We do not implying any
emotional baggage with the term "homosexual." hindi namin implying anumang
emosyonal na bagahe na may salitang "homosexual." We define orientation according
to a person's sexual attraction. Kami tukuyin ang orientation ayon sa sekswal na-akit ng
isang tao. Thus, for example, a homosexual is attracted only to members of the same
sex. Kaya, halimbawa, ang isang homosexual ay akit lamang sa mga kasapi ng
parehong kasarian. A celibate homosexual is still a homosexual because they are still
attracted only to persons of the same sex. Ang walang asawa ay bading pa rin ang
isang homosexual ay dahil pa rin sila akit lamang sa mga tao ng parehong kasarian.
This contrasts with the definition use by many religious conservatives who base their
definitions on behavior. Ito contrasts sa ang kahulugan gamitin sa pamamagitan ng
maraming mga relihiyon conservatives na base sa kanilang pagbibigay-kahulugan sa
pag-uugali. Most conservatives consider a celibate homosexual to be an ex-gay. Karamihan sa
mga conservatives isaalang-alang ang isang homosexual ayaw mag-asawa upang maging isang
ex-gay.

Terms: Gay marriage, same-sex marriage, SSM, homosexual marriage, traditional

marriage, counterfeit marriage.... Kasunduan: Gay kasal, parehong-sex kasal, SSM,
homosexual kasal, tradisyonal na kasal, palsipikado kasal ....

Many news sources use "same-sex marriage" and "gay marriage" interchangeably.
Maraming mga mapagkukunan ng balita gamitin ang "parehong-kasarian kasal" at
"gay kasal" interchangeably. "Gay marriage" is not accurate in many cases, because
some same-sex marriages are composed of one bisexual and one homosexual, or
two bisexuals. "Bakla kasal" ay hindi tumpak na sa maraming kaso, dahil ang ilang
mga parehong-sex marriages ay binubuo ng isang bisexual at homosexual isa, o
dalawang bisexuals.
Religious and social conservatives generally use terms like "gay marriage" or "homosexual
marriage." Relihiyosong at panlipunan conservatives karaniwang gamitin terms tulad ng "gay
kasal" o "homosexual kasal." They often enclose the word "marriage" in quotation marks to
indicate that they do not consider SSM to be a legitimate form of marriage. Sila ay madalas
ipalibot ang salitang "kasal" sa quotation marks upang ipahiwatig na hindi isaalang-alang ang
 kanilang SSM na maging isang lehitimong anyo ng kasal. They often use the term "traditional
marriage" to refer to marriage by an opposite-sex couple. Sila ay madalas gamitin ang salitang
"tradisyunal na kasal" upang sumangguni sa pag-aasawa sa pamamagitan ng isang
kabaligtaran-sex ilang. "Pro-family" generally means that the group is supportive of families
led by opposite-sex couples while simultaneously being opposed to equal rights for families
led by same-sex couples. "Pro-pamilya" sa pangkalahatan ay nangangahulugan na ang grupo
ay supportive ng mga pamilya na humantong sa pamamagitan ng kabaligtaran-sex Couples
habang sabay-sabay na tutol sa pantay na mga karapatan para sa mga pamilya na humantong
sa pamamagitan ng parehong-sex Couples.
Gay-positive groups generally use terms like "same-sex marriage" and "marriage equality."
Gay-positibong mga grupo sa pangkalahatan gamitin termino tulad ng "parehong-kasarian
kasal" at "kasal na pagkakapantay-pantay."

On this site, we mostly use the terms "same-sex marriage" and its acronym SSM. Sa site na ito,
kami halos gamitin ang mga kataga "parehong-kasarian kasal" at acronym nito SSM.