2/23/2014 10 Golden Rules for staying happy with the One You Love, Reverend Holly Skinner, Premarital

ner, Premarital Counseling San Diego, California

Sunday, February 23, 2014

National Association of Wedding Ministers

Premarital Questionnaire
NAWM encourages all couples to attend premarital counseling/coaching sessions if possible. Howev er, if y ou
will not be receiv ing premarital counseling then please read the following questions and answer them with y our
fiancé. Y ou will be surprised how much y ou learn about each other and y our relationship from answering these
simple questions. Hav e fun; be honest and follow-up with counseling, if necessary .

Relationship
• Do y ou lov e and trust y our fiancé?
• How will y ou make decisions once y ou are married?
• How would y ou handle/settle an argument?
• What do y ou do if y ou cannot agree?
• Is it hard to say please, thank y ou and I'm sorry ?
• When y ou are ill, how much sy mpathy and attention do y ou desire?
• How would y ou handle end-of-life decisions and life insurance?
• How will y ou relate to in-laws, opposite-sex friends, ex -spouse or children from prev ious relationships after
y ou are married?
• Do y ou believ e y our fiancé will be faithful?
• Can y ou see y ourselv es growing old together?
• Is y our fiancé an honest and truthful person?
• How do y ou show each other affection?
• Is y our fiancé kind, gentle and understanding of children, co-workers and family ?

Finances
• Who will be the primary financial prov ider in the family ?
• Do y ou support y our fiancé’s career?
• How will y ou decide on what major purchases to make?
• Who will pay the bills and keep the checkbook?
• What is y our philosophy of giv ing to y our church or other charitable organizations?
• What are y our thoughts about the use of credit cards?
• If either y ou or y our spouse lost y our job, what budget items would y ou cut?
• Will y ou hav e joint sav ings and checking accounts?
• Hav e y ou created a family budget?
• What percentage of y our income will go toward home, car, groceries, utilities etc?

Hom e
• Where do y ou want to liv e and in what setting would y ou want to liv e (city , suburb, small town, rural, plains,
mountains, desert, coastal, etc.)
• What do y ou ex pect y our marriage and standard of liv ing to be like after fiv e y ears?
• How soon after y ou are married do y ou ex pect to hav e y our home reasonably furnished?
• Will y ou do y our own home maintenance?
• Who will do the landscaping?

Housekeeping
• Who will prepare each meal and what ty pes of food will y ou eat?
• How often will y ou eat out?
• Who will do the laundry and ironing?
• Who will go purchase groceries?
• Who will make sure general automobile maintenance is done?
• Who will do general household cleaning and bed making?
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2/23/2014 10 Golden Rules for staying happy with the One You Love, Reverend Holly Skinner, Premarital Counseling San Diego, California

• Who will wash and dry the dishes?

• Do y ou want a pet in the home? If so, what ty pe?

Children and Parenting

• What is y our attitude towards children?
• When will y ou begin hav ing children and how many ?
• What would y ou do if y ou cannot conceiv e children of y our own?
• What is y our v iew on abortion and birth control?
• Who will be the primary caregiv er of y our children?
• How will y ou discipline them?
• Who will be the primary disciplinarian?
• Will y our children do chores?
• Will they receiv e an allowance and how much?
• How will y ou deal with children from a prev ious marriage?
• How will y ou deal with issues at their school?

Social Activ ities/Church

• Do y ou share the same beliefs?
• Will y ou attend the same house of worship?
• What will y ou teach y our children regarding y our faith?
• What hobbies or recreational activ ities will y ou pursue indiv idually , together and how often?
• How will y our personal friendships (his/her friends) change after marriage?
• How do y ou feel about alcoholic bev erages, smoking and guns in y our home?
• Where will y ou spend the holiday s, birthday s and anniv ersaries?
• Will y ou both hav e certain times to spend with y our own friends?
• Will y ou be joining any social clubs?

Red Flags
• Y our fiancé seems to be irrationally jealous of friends, family or past relationships.
• Y our fiancé is prone to ex treme emotional outbursts and mood swings.
• Y our fiancé display s controlling/smothering behav ior.
• Y our fiancé is unable to hold a job.
• Y our fiancé is unable to resolv e conflict.
• Y our fiancé ex hibits dishonesty .
• Y our fiancé does not treat y ou with respect.
• Y our fiancé is ov erly dependent on others for money .
• Y our fiancé ex hibits patterns of phy sical, emotional or sex ual abuse towards y ou or others.
• Y our fiancé display s signs of drug/alcohol abuse

Note: If any of these signs ex ist, y ou should schedule a time to talk with a minister or counselor immediately .

By Web: www.idov ows.com By Email: rev holly @cox .net By Phone - 7 60-944-4496 (San Diego, California)

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