Once upOn a time Then as if in hopes of maintaining my help but listen to their hearty and derisive l
short fiction by R. Beady presence there for for the sake of it, xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxxxxxx aughter,
The news I got in Jackson made it seem
as if the atmosphere of revolt among agents
I’d become familiar with on assignment in
the North Woods a few years ago had
finally encouraged some of them
and settle old scores. From one in
until at least three in the afternoon,
by reports, were
feeding off the
Nowhere since
clean consciences].
air and safe water.
Idling comfortably
bottle of Budweiser S
with look
establish
doorway
where
construction contractor
levy any confrontat
relative paucity of Crimson Tide ephemeralia
for a place so close to unapologetically
collegiate Tuscaloosa — nary ten minor
In most other regards the joint was not
NO. 26, FALL & WINTER 2007
unlike Goofy’s or Puffer’s back in Chicago,
and I found myself steeping in a small surge
of [familiarity, reminiscences] as I laid my ID
Imy first night out in
how different he
broke rank and turned as if prompted by a
disturbed record needle. “Well, not really,” I
“South Carolina originally and I live in
outside of Birmingham
could hardly hold their laughter, didn’t mind
smiling cross at me. I could see their meaty
faces in the mirror behind the bar, and they
laughed at the back of my head as if the
technology was not an obvious foil.
I didn’t draw my notebook, and I didn’t
draw the reading
material in my jacket pocket. I did pick up a
local car trader mag from the end of the bar
and perused late ‘60s to mid-’70s muscle cars
after becoming satisfied with nonchalant
surveyance of my environs. I drank another
two mo
for the
donations of $30 or more. All donations offset the costs of printing, distribution and our public reading series. Otherwise,
missre
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presents this visual feature with submissions from CHARLES BUCHANAN and ANDREW DAVIS. For regular programming,
AUDIO EDITOR CT Ballentine
p xxx xxx xxxxxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxxxxx
stamps) apiece to the address below. A sampler package of 5 issues is available for $4, and lifetime subscriptions for
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We break form this quarter, however, to let our art department stretch out a bit — resident artist ROB FUNDERBURK
FAQ EDITOR Mickey Hess
s x x x x x x x x x a relative paucity of Crimson
T
JANITOR R. Beady
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RESIDENT ARTIST Rob Funderburk
EDITOR/PUBLISHER Todd Dills
EDITOR Jeb Gleason-Allured
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THE2NDHAND c/o Todd Dills
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to assert that although I might be passing an xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxxxxx xxx xxx
through at present that my presence was not xxx xxx xxx xx xapparent glee with some new
fleeting. Determination, and if only for my txxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxxx x xopic. When
three bottles of beer I was going to enjoy my Ixxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxxxxx xxx xxx
respite, damnit. Eventually I’d exhausted my flushed the urinal and their sound cut full off
own patience besides
satisfying this purpose
xxx xxx xxx xxx xgained a pretty fair idea
xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxxxxx xxx xxx xx of
xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxxx x x x it’s object.
Figured I could hasten my dow nfall by
XXX xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xspeaking back
xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxxx x x x x music
By that time that oxxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxxr just make way
entourage accumulated four or five more out and XXX,
constituents, and it seemed the area there by but with XXX in mind I ...
door was lost be I entered the establishment through a
uncontracted. XXX and row of construction contractor-
to the Thursday meeting of the Local types who did their best to XXX. I can keep
exit, however, was a tough-enough look about me and did so
restroom I had to idling casually up to the bar, where although
order to get there. a cold gin & tonic would have hit the spot I
I thought ordered a Bud so as not to make an unneces-
ll wasll be sary spectacle of myself. Absolutely every
other patron in the bar was drinking a
Budweiser, save for the XXX who had a
Miller Lite and an empty smudged-up
shotglass. Realized a relative paucity of
Crimson Tide ephemeralia for a place so
close to unapologetically collegiate Tusca-
loosa — nary ten minor pieces hung high on
the walls above the back bar — but in most
other regards the joint was not unlike Goofy’s
“Boys, I gotta piss,” I said and the men fell or Puffer’s back in Chicago, and I found
stone silent, conspicuously avoiding looking myself steeping in a small surge of [familiar-
me in the balls both ity, reminiscences] as I laid my ID and
eyes as I sto twenty-dollar bill on the bar. Bill told me the
way I looked my first night out in Chicago,
and how different he saw me on the night I
made my way, how I acted like XXX but
XXX. I entered the establishment through a
XXX and row of construction contractor-
types who did their best to XXX. I can keep
a tough-enough look about me and d x id so
god before them. S idling casually up to the bar, where although
omeone had to budge first, but none wanted The guys a cold habit tonic would hahit the s forever
to xxxxxxxto relinquish their position. So that run ordered a Bud so as not to make an unneces-
One parted, then the one next to him and I the store sary spectacle of myself. still. But the only
slid past. The lights in the john were out,are so untouchable.
other other patron in the bshare some sense
there in the dark I pissed and couldn’tv If they choose, they save for the who had a would not let me se
xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxx xxxxxx xxx xxxwill xxxshoot you xfullx ofx holes
x x xasxxyou
x x an empty case of whatever’d
x x x x xx smudged-up shotglass. Realized
walk in. If you retaliate, you will be
put to a torturous death. How could
Tide ephemeralia for a place so close to
they be at fault?unapologetically
It was your collegiate Tuscaloosa —
offense. They own thenarystore,tenandminor pieces hung high on the walls
the truth. above the back bar — but in mo other above
CHARLES BUCHANAN (Oasis image above)
renders Alabama’s landmarks and familiar
icons as bold, graphic block prints that
exude the physical and mental landscape
of a drive through the state. To see more
of his work, visit cbuchanan.net. Charles
also works as a magazine editor with the
University of Alabama at Birmingham.
ANDREW DAVIS (Funland sequences) works
with ceramics, comics, paint, and college
students in Bloomington, Indiana. Select
parts of his bible-in-progress for the Church
of Motivation Without Direction, 40 Days of
Antipurpose, are featured semi-regularly at
THE2NDHAND.com.