GOAL TO GO

Episode 3.33

“Wilma & Betty”

by

David Polk
 2.

RECAP

We Recap events from Previous Episodes, ending on Achilles

regarding a photo of his baby daughter, Angel Addams.

TEASER

FADE IN:

EXT. TRAINING ROOM – SUNSET

A few GUYS sit in therapeutic hot tubs recovering from a

hard afternoon of practice.

GREG
No way man, it’s Wilma hands down.

JET
C’mon, G! You’re telling me you’d take
the house frau over the hot honey?!

SHAWN
Wait, Betty’s a house wife too.

CRASH
More like a hot ass MILF! And I’d nail
that. All-Night-Long, dog.

GREG
Look, Wilma’s got the looks and she’s
got the brains. Betty’s a ditz.

CRASH
Hey, any chick who’d marry a moron like
Fred Flintstone can’t be the brightest
bulb on the tree.

JET
And she’s got a flat ass.

GREG
Bull-shit! Girl’s got a sweet ass.

JET
How the hell do you know? She’s a two-
dimensional cartoon.

GREG
She’s based on Ginger from Gilligan’s
Island, and Ginger’s ass was totally
PHAT.
 3.

CRASH
You gotta admit, old boy’s got a point
there, Jet. Ginger had a nice ass for
a white girl.
(smacks the back of his hand)
A big, juicy bubble butt.

GREG
Nice tits too.

SHAWN
Yeah, but Ginger was a ho. Now my girl
Mary Ann: sweet and wholesome on the
outside, a total freak on the inside.
I’d take that over Ginger every time.

JET
Every time!

Shawn Ellis and Jet Johnson, in adjacent tubs, high five in

solidarity.

SHAWN
So which do you think Mrs. D is – a
Wilma or a Betty?

GREG
Damn, that’s a tough one.

CRASH
Yeah, she definitely has that
wholesome, girl-next-door Betty/Mary
Ann thing going, like at the barbeque
this summer. But did you check her out
at the sports banquet in February?
Lady D was struttin’ some serious
Ginger action.

JET
I know you’re not trying to say Mrs. D
is a ho?

CRASH
Why you playing like that, dog?! You
know I didn’t say that!

GREG
You said Ginger was a ho, and you just
said Mrs. D has Ginger-like tendencies.
 4.

CRASH
Dog, you know you’re not right. I
didn’t say anything like that. I meant
she’s fine like Ginger.

SHAWN
Well, Coach Garcia’s old lady is a
Betty/Mary Ann. We can all get behind
that, can’t we?

JET
With three kids, I’d say Coach G
already got behind that a few times!

Off their laughter, Achilles Addams and Dallas Morales come

in and climb into separate hot tubs.

ACHILLES
What’s up fellahs?

GREG
We were just talking about the new
“Wilma” audible package Coach Garcia
put in today and it got us thinking.

DALLAS
Uh-oh, if you pendejos are thinking
somebody better call the stooge squad.

Cynical laughter from the guys.

JET
So you can only bang one for the rest
of your life: Wilma or Betty?

The answer’s a no brainer for both Dallas and Achilles.

DALLAS
Wilma.

ACHILLES
Betty.

CRASH
Why does that not surprise me? Both of
you are so pussy whipped.

ACHILLES
It’s better than being palm whipped.
Have you even kissed a girl since you
got here, Crash? I mean a real one?
 5.

Laughter from the guys.

CRASH
(ignoring)
Check it, Morales: Cat’s a redhead.
Wilma - redhead. Cat - hard ass bitch.
Wilma - hard ass bitch...

GREG
Ouch, that’s cold, man.

DALLAS
Just because Red can kick your ass,
Crash, doesn’t make her a bitch.

ACHILLES
Technically, the Lesbot can kick his
ass and she’s a bitch. So I’d say he’s
got you on that one, D.
(to Crash)
What about Portia and Betty? I don’t
see it.

CRASH
(as though it’s obvious)
Come on, Q.B. Portia’s not a redhead
and she’s not a bitch. Ergo...

GREG
So now you’re saying that Mrs. D is a
bitch and a ho?

DALLAS
What?! You called Mrs. D a whore?!

CRASH
Nobody called Mrs. D a whore!

JET
You said Mrs. D is like Ginger, who you
said was a ho.

ACHILLES
Ginger? Who the hell is Ginger?

GREG
You know, Ginger and Mary Ann from
Gilligan’s Island. That’s who Wilma
and Betty were patterned after.
 6.

SHAWN
Now that I think about it, Portia is
definitely more Mary Ann than Betty.

CRASH
(to Shawn)
Didn’t you say you wanted to nail
Portia all night long?

AHCILLES
(grips edge of hot tub)
WHAT??!!

SHAWN
(nervously to Achilles)
No! No-no-no! I didn’t say anything
like that, Q.B.!
(to a grinning Crash)
Mary Ann! I said I’d nail Mary Ann,
you asshole!

DALLAS
Hold up. Wilma and Betty weren’t
patterned after Ginger and Mary Ann.
The Flintstones came before Gilligan’s
Island.

GREG
Seriously? You sure about that?

DALLAS
Yeah, pretty sure.

JET
Then who the hell are they patterned
after?

DALLAS
(beat, thinks)
Alice and Trixie.

The guys react, “Who and who?!”

DALLAS
Yeah, Wilma and Betty were a takeoff on
Alice Cramden and Trixie Norton from
“The Honeymooners,” that old black and
white television show. You know, the
one where the fat guy is a bus driver
and his skinny moron best friend works
in the sewer.
 7.

The guys think, then remember. “Oh Yeah! That show!” The
thought of having sex with either of the “Plain Janes” from
the 1950s brings frowns to all of their faces. Then –

ACHILLES
Yeah...you know what? The Lesbot is
definitely an Alice.

That rips it for Dallas, who is out of his tub and after
Achilles, who is already up and out of his tub, laughing as
he runs out of the room and down the hallway.

FADE OUT.

END OF TEASER
 8.

ACT ONE

FADE IN:

EXT. PENNEBAKER INDUSTRIES BUILDING – DAY

To establish a glass and steel skyscraper in Seattle.

INT. BOARD ROOM – DAY

[NOTE: Throughout this Episode, when each of our principle

female characters is introduced, we will FREEZE FRAME and
identify her as either a “Wilma” or a “Betty”]

The BOARD OF DIRECTORS of Pennebaker Industries sits around

a massive mahogany table. They’re already deep into a
serious conversation when the door opens and Gale Donahue
strides in, impeccably dressed in a black pinstriped suit -

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Wilma”

GALE
Please forgive me for being late.

The board members immediately stand. FLORENCE SYMINGTON

(35), efficient and savvy, approaches. She takes Gale’s
hand in greeting.

FLORENCE
Mrs. Donahue, Florence Symington. We
spoke on the phone.

GALE
Yes, hello, Ms. Symington.

FLORENCE
Florence, please. We’ve saved a seat
for you here.

Florence guides Gale to a leather chair. She takes a seat

between TWO MEN. The 16 board members take their seats.

FLORENCE
Ladies and gentlemen, I’m sure you all
recognize Mrs. Gale Donahue.

They nod and smile, Gale nods and smiles in return. At the
head of the table a handsome, debonair man speaks in a
velvety Australian accent. This is PARKER ST. JOHN (52).
 9.

PARKER
Mrs. Donahue, let me be among the first
to welcome you today. I know how busy
you must be, especially at this point
in the football season. Please know
how much we all appreciate your time.

GALE
Thank you.

PARKER
Let’s take a few minutes to go around
the table and introduce ourselves to
our guest. I’m Parker St. John, Acting
CEO of Pennebaker Industries.

The introductions continue...

INT. LAW OFFICE MEETING ROOM – DAY

Bob Garcia stares stony-eyed into the middle distance and

listens as MIMI’S LAWYER reads a list of property and
personal possessions to be fought over in their divorce.

MIMI’S LAWYER (O.S.)

...as well as the Scuba gear, the Sea-
Doo, and sole ownership rights to the
time share in Maui –

BOB’S LAWYER (O.S.)

(interrupts)
Now wait a minute! That’s just
ridiculous! Mrs. Garcia doesn’t even
swim, so why in heaven’s name would she
want a Sea-Doo and Scuba equipment?

MIMI’S LAWYER (O.S.)

These were all items purchased by Mrs.
Garcia –

BOB’S LAWYER (O.S.)

(interrupts)
As gifts to her husband who is a
certified scuba diver –

MIMI’S LAWYER (O.S.)

With money she earned working a full-
time job while being the primary child
care provider to their first son.
 10.

As the lawyers continue to bicker, Bob shifts his gaze

directly across the table to his wife, Mimi Garcia –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Betty”

Mimi and Bob lock eyes. In hers we read bitterness; in his

resignation.

MIMI
I want the scuba gear, the Sea-Doo and
the Maui time share. Period.

BOB’S LAWYER (O.S.)

But, Mrs. Garcia, surely these items
hold little or no value to you. Even
if you sold them they wouldn’t fetch
more than a few thousand dollars in
total.

MIMI’S LAWYER (O.S.)

That is beside the point –

BOB
It’s fine. She can have them.
(then)
You want it all don’t you, Mimi? The
house, the cars, the plasma
screens...the kids? Everything.

MIMI
I gave you everything I had Bob. Now I
want it back.

INT. BOARD ROOM – DAY

The board meeting has concluded. When the last board

member has said good-bye to Gale, Parker comes up.

PARKER
Gale, if you’re available, I’d be
delighted if you’d join me for lunch.

GALE
I’d like that very much, Parker.

OFF Parker’s charming smile...

 11.

INT. PARKER’S OFFICE – DAY

Parker and Gale sit at a round table that’s been set up

like in a fine café restaurant. They’re dining on salad.
He refills her glass with sparkling water.

PARKER
I can’t tell you how sorry we all were
to have lost Maria so tragically. She
was such a lovely and charming woman.

GALE
I think of her constantly. As you
know, we had become quite close.

PARKER
It must have been awful for you, going
through that ordeal. How are you,
Gale?

GALE
Having Billy and the boys, J.R. and
Duncan, has helped a great deal. They
need me and that’s allowed me to focus
on something besides myself.

PARKER
Yes, of course. This is why family is
so very important, to help us through
times of immeasurable grief. But, if I
may – and forgive me if I seem out of
line – you mustn’t neglect your own
needs, Gale.

GALE
Thank you, Parker. You’re so kind.
(then)
Please forgive my ignorance of
corporate protocols, but do you mind my
asking: why are you only “acting” CEO?
I would think a company of this size
would have a succession plan.

PARKER
The board “appointed” me acting
chairman and CEO after Harold’s death.
But our corporate bylaws require a vote
by the shareholders to confirm that
appointment.
 12.

GALE
And that hasn’t happened yet?

PARKER
The annual shareholders’ meeting is in
January. But the shareholder vote is
merely a formality.

GALE
Before taking over as acting CEO, what
was your role here at Pennebaker
Industries?

PARKER
I’ve been chief legal officer for the
last four years, but you could say I’ve
been Harold’s right hand man much
longer than that.

GALE
How long had you and Harold been
friends?

PARKER
We met 15 years ago in Hong Kong when
the law firm I worked for helped
structure Harold’s largest financial
deal in Asia, the one that made him so
bloody rich. But I wouldn’t say Harold
and I were friends.
(off her reaction)
I admired Harold immensely as a
businessman and philanthropist but –
well, let’s just say he and I were cut
from different cloth.

Gale studies him for a beat, believes she understands his

meaning. And his magnetism is not lost on her.

GALE
Ms. Symington – Florence – said the
board wants me to join them as a
director of the company. Why? Other
than being a spokeswoman for Cover Girl
20 years ago I have no real corporate
experience. And I have no ties to
Pennebaker Industries aside from my
work as a consultant for Harold’s non-
profit foundation.

He looks at her. Knows when he’s being tested.

 13.

PARKER
Harold owned 33 percent of Pennebaker
Industries’ outstanding shares, which
are now held in trust for Duncan.
Yours is the hand that rocks the
cradle, Gale. I felt you would
eventually want to know how the company
was being run. What better way to put
you at ease than to invite you to
become a director?

EXT. PENNEBAKER INDUSTRIES BUILDING – DAY

Gale steps out of the revolving door and onto the street.
She pulls her cell phone out, hits a speed dial number.

GALE
Yes, Mattie, all went well. A Ms.
Symington will be in touch with you
about scheduling board meetings
beginning in January.
(listens)
Yes, I’ve made my decision.
(listens)
No, Mattie, I prefer to tell him over
dinner. Please make a reservation for
8:30 at D’Agostino’s.

Gale’s Jaguar Coupe pulls to the curb, a valet hops out,

holds the door for her.

GALE
I’m getting in the car now, Mattie.
Kiss Duncan for me and tell him Mommy
will be home soon.

She clicks off, gets in the car and drives away.

INT. OLD HOUSE – SUNSET

“The Jerry Springer” show blares ON THE TELEVISION.

YOUNG WOMAN (O.S.)

(calling)
Will you turn that down? I just got
the baby asleep!

A MAN is stretched out on the sofa. We recognize him as

the man who assaulted Billy Donahue with a tire iron.
 14.

MAN
(drowsily)
Will you stop yelling? Jeez!

The young woman who duped Billy into stopping on the side
of the road in our Previous Episode comes in from the next
room. She looks haggard. She angrily grabs the television
remote from the coffee table and shuts off the television.
The man reacts.

YOUNG WOMAN
I told you, I just got the baby asleep!
Unless you’re going to stay up with him
all night I don’t want this thing on!

BLAM! The front door bashes open and PLAINCLOTHES OFFICERS

rush in, shouting and brandishing handguns. The young
woman is terrified. The man finally gets off the sofa. We
hear a BABY CRYING...

INT. BILLY’S OFFICE – SUNSET

Billy Donahue is at his desk poring over a PLAYBOOK. The

desk phone RINGS. He ignores it, flips a page in the
three-ring binder. A KNOCK on the door and his secretary
Donna Dixon sticks her head in –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Betty”

DONNA
Chief D’Agostino is on the phone,
Coach.

Billy pauses before picking up the phone. Donna lingers in

the door as he begins to speak.

BILLY
Chief, hello.

CHIEF D’AGOSTINO (V.O.)

Coach, we got’em.

OFF Billy...

INT. JAILHOUSE LINEUP ROOM – DAY

Billy looks at a lineup of female criminal suspects through

a two-sided mirror. One of them is the young woman who
participated in his roadside assault.
 15.

BILLY
(ref: young woman)
That’s her, the blonde with the blue
shirt. Number 4.

CHIEF D’AGOSTINO
You’re sure, Coach?

BILLY
I didn’t get a good look at the guy who
hit me, but that’s definitely the woman
from that night. Without a doubt.

CHIEF D’AGOSTINO
Thank you, Coach.

The chief nods to an ATTENDING OFFICER, who picks up a

phone on the wall.

ATTENDING OFFICER
(into phone)
Alright, you may file out now.

The line of women suspects file out.

INT. HOTEL ROOM – NIGHT

Champ Sussman is checking himself out in a full-length

mirror when there’s a KNOCK at the door. Satisfied with
his appearance, he takes a bottle of champagne from an ice
bucket, pours two glasses, then crosses to the door, opens
it.

Bella Milovich stands there in a short black trench coat –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Wilma”

BELLA
(German accent)
Hello, Bill.

CHAMP
Greta, please come in.

He closes the door and follows her into the room, picking
up the glasses of champagne. She puts her purse on the
dresser.

CHAMP
You look marvelous this evening.
 16.

She gives him a come hither smile. He hands her a

champagne glass and they clink glasses. After a sip -

CHAMP
I’ve been looking forward to seeing you
again, Greta.

BELLA
(German accent)
And I you, Bill.

She unfastens the tie of her trench coat to reveal she is

naked underneath. Champ takes her champagne glass and they
begin kissing.

INT. ACHILLES & PORTIA’S APARTMENT – NIGHT

Achilles comes in and tosses his book bag on the floor.

ACHILLES
(calls out)
Portia! Portia!

He goes in the kitchen, then checks the bedroom and the

bathroom. No Portia. Back in the living room, he checks
his watch, frowns, then pulls out his cell phone. Hits a
speed dial number. We hear it RINGING. Just as the
ANSWERING SYSTEM starts, he hangs up, sighs in frustration.

INT. D’AGOSTINO’S RESTAURANT – NIGHT

Billy and Gale are having dinner.

GALE
Who are these people, Billy?

BILLY
According to the Chief, a couple of
drug addicts and petty crooks with wrap
sheets a mile long. They’re wanted for
burglaries and carjackings in three
states on the West Coast.

GALE
My God! Have they hurt other people?
 17.

BILLY
Sal said they’re considered dangerous,
but apparently I’m the only moke they
actually sent to the hospital. Just
that damned Irish luck of mine I guess.
Can you believe it?

GALE
Well, whatever the maximum penalty is,
that’s what they deserve and I intend
to see that they get it.

BILLY
Yeah...I suppose.

GALE
What? They could have killed you,
Billy. For all we know, they believed
you were dead when they drove off.

BILLY
I know. Sal also said they’ve got a
baby, an 18-month-old boy. Same age as
Duncan.

Gale reacts, saddened by the thought.

GALE
How awful. Poor thing.
(then)
Billy honey, you know I went to the
Pennebaker board meeting today.

BILLY
How did that go?

GALE
Fine. They’re mostly a bunch of “Yes
Men” and bean counters. Just the sort
of sycophants you’d expect Harold to
surround himself with.
(beat)
Billy, I’ve decided to take them up on
their offer. I’m going to join the PI
board of directors.

BILLY
Gale, babe, I know it seems like a
logical thing for you to do to look out
(MORE)
 18.

BILLY (CONT’D.)
for Duncan’s interests, but you’ve got
to realize those people are just luring
you into some kind of trap.

GALE
Oh, Billy honey, I’m not foolish. Of
course I know they’re up to something.
But - what’s that old saying - “Keep
your friends close, keep your enemies
closer?” Trust me, honey, I won’t get
in over my head with that bunch of
fuddy-duddies. And I will never let
anyone do anything to harm my Duncan.

EXT. HONDA ELEMENT/DONAHUE DRIVEWAY – NIGHT

J.R. Donahue pulls his ELEMENT into the driveway and stops
behind a NISSAN 380Z. He glances at his DASHBOARD CLOCK -
10:21 – and smirks before climbing out of his car. He
walks up to the 380Z. The windows of the sports car are
fogged up. A couple is inside making out heavily. J.R.
shakes his head, continues to the house.

INT. DONAHUE KITCHEN – 5 MINUTES LATER

J.R. is looking in the refrigerator when Gracie Wellington

comes in –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Betty”

Gracie stands next to J.R. in front of the refrigerator.

Now that she’s here he takes his sweet time finding
something to snack on. She’s patient for a beat but then
reaches in front of him and pulls out a YOGURT.

She goes to get a spoon from a drawer, opens the yogurt and
dips the spoon in.

J.R.
You haven’t swallowed enough of that
for one night?

GRACIE
(eating a spoonful)
You’re such an asshole, you know that.
 19.

J.R.
Didn’t anyone ever tell you talking
with your mouth full is un-ladylike?

Disgusted with him, she walks out.

INT. BATHROOM – LATER

Gracie sticks two fingers down her throat and vomits into
the toilet. When she’s done praying to the Porcelain God,
she washes her face, brushes her teeth. She stares at
herself in the mirror for a long moment. Smiles to make
herself feel pretty. She goes to the door, turns out the
light and exits.

INT. HOTEL ROOM - NIGHT

Bella is sitting up in bed, looking at Champ as he puts on

his overcoat. Champ pulls an envelope out of his coat,
puts it on the dresser next to her purse.

CHAMP
You are an incredible young
woman...Greta.

BELLA
(German accent)
Danke.

A long beat as they look at each other from across the

room. Then he walks out. We hear the DOOR CLOSE. Bella
gets out of bed, crosses to the dresser and opens the
envelope. She fingers the CASH inside: $700 - half a
night’s work plus a little extra. She also finds a NOTE.
She pulls it out and as she reads...

CHAMP (V.O.)
Bella. A beautiful name for a
beautiful girl. No one has ever
touched me the way you have, Bella. I
want to continue seeing you but only if
it’s safe. When I call again, I will
ask for you – “Bella” – and if you
come, I will know you understand fully
the nature of our unique relationship.

Bella folds the note, puts it back on the dresser. She

looks at herself in the mirror. Then she goes to the
bathroom. We hear the SHOWER turn on...
 20.

INT. ACHILLES & PORTIA’S APARTMENT – NIGHT

The door opens and Portia Addams comes into the darkened
apartment –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Wilma”

She puts her book bag on the floor next to Achilles’ book
bag, is startled when she sees him sitting on the sofa,
waiting.

PORTIA
Lee, you’re up.

ACHILLES
(gets up, goes to her)
You expect me to sleep when my wife is
out past one in the morning?

They lock eyes.

PORTIA
I sleep when you’re not here, Lee.

She walks past him, goes to the bathroom. He follows.

ACHILLES
I was worried, Portia. I called you a
half-dozen times. You could’ve at
least called to tell me you were
alright.

PORTIA
It’s Maitland, Lee, not East Orange. I
think I can take care of myself here.

He stands in the doorway, trying to keep his cool, as she

brushes and flosses her teeth. When she’s done, she turns
to leave. He steps aside to let her.

ACHILLES
Where were you, Portia? Who were you
with all this time?

She turns to face him, stares at him hard.

PORTIA
You don’t have the right to ask me
that, Lee. Not after what you’ve done.
 21.

ACHILLES
Is this how it’s going to be from now
on, Portia? Because if it is –

PORTIA
What? If it is, what, Lee?

Beat.

ACHILLES
If you want me to say I’m sorry every
day for the rest of my life I will.
Just tell me what you want me to do,
Portia, and I’ll do it.

PORTIA
I don’t know what I want from you
anymore, Lee.

ACHILLES
Please, Portia, at least say can you
forgive me, if not right now, then some
day. Please.

PORTIA
How can I say that, Lee? How do I know
another girl’s not going to show up
tomorrow with a little bastard on her
hip?

ACHILLES
That’s not going to happen, Portia, you
know that. I haven’t cheated on you
since we’ve been married.

PORTIA
(scoffs, emotion rising)
Since we’ve been married!! You’ve been
cheating on me since the day you got
here, Lee - with this Becky girl and
then with that...that Chinese sorority
slut! And God knows who else.

He reacts, but wisely resists the urge to correct her on

Valerie’s ethnicity.

ACHILLES
I told you, Portia, what happened with
Becky was two years ago and I had no
idea she was pregnant or had a baby.
And it’s over with Valerie. Over.
 22.

PORTIA
(fighting back tears)
I’ve done everything for you, Achilles.
Everything. I’ve lied to protect you,
I turned my back on my own father, I’ve
given you every piece of me, body and
soul...I’m 19 years old, I’ve only been
married for a year, and I’m already
stepmother to a child I’ve never met.

Tears stream down her face. He moves to put his arms

around her but she pulls away.

ACHILLES
(pleading)
Please, Portia. I’m so sorry that I
hurt you...Please.

PORTIA
(sobbing)
Hurt me, Lee? Hurt me? You’ve broken
my heart. I don’t think I can ever
forgive you. Ever...

She turns and goes crying into the bedroom, closes the door
behind her. OFF a distraught Achilles...

FADE OUT.

END OF ACT ONE

 23.

ACT TWO

FADE IN:

INT. CAT AND DALLAS’ BEDROOM - DAWN

CLOSE ON the TATTOO on a woman’s shoulder blade. Dallas

comes into frame, kisses the woman’s back. She MOANS
wantonly. Then cell phone RINGS with a DISTINCTIVE TONE
and Cara “Cat” Trzcinski pops up from the bed –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Wilma”

Cat finds her phone and answers excitedly.

CAT
Hi!

CAKE (V.O.)
Bon jour! Hope I didn’t “interrupt”
anything.

CAT
Bullshit! You know you did.

CAKE (V.O.)
Slut!

CAT
Whore!

INT. TINY APARTMENT – DAY

We’re looking out a window. Far off in the distance we can

see the Eiffel Tower. REVERSE to FIND Cake D’Agostino –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Betty”

She’s lying across the bed, looking out the window as she
talks on her cell phone.

CAKE
Tell Dallas I’m really sorry!

INTERCUT CAT/CAKE

CAT
(to Dallas)
Cake says “sorry” she cock blocked.
 24.

He groans and pulls a pillow over his head.

CAT
He says no problem. He’ll just ravage
me in the shower right after I’m off
the phone.

Dallas peeks out from under the pillow. Cat smiles at him
impishly. He rolls out of bed, goes naked to the bathroom.

CAKE
So besides screwing your incredibly
sexy boyfriend to death, what else have
you been up to?

CAT
We host Notre Dame in the quarterfinals
of the NCAA tournament this weekend.

CAKE
That’s incredible! Congratulations,
Cat! I wish I were there to see you
play.

CAT
So do I, Cake. What about you, are you
still absolutely loving Paris?

CAKE
Oh Cat, it’s still
(French pronunciation)
“incredible!” The food, the fashion –
I can’t get over how sophisticated the
city is. I love it here, Cat!

CAT
What about the men?

CAKE
(coy)
What about them?

CAT
Don’t play stupid, Stupid. You’ve been
in Paris for over four months. You’re
telling me you haven’t had one date?
 25.

CAKE
Le Cordon Bleu is the toughest school
I’ve ever been in, Cat. It’s hard
enough to keep up as it is. I don’t
have time for guys.

CAT
Not even French guys?!

CAKE
Not even French guys, Cat.

CAT
(impish grin)
I bet you’re going through a lot of
French batteries then.

CAKE
Whore.

CAT
Slut.

We hear the SHOWER come on in Cat’s bathroom.

CAKE
How’s everybody else doing? Ed,
Gloria?

CAT
(beat)
They’re fine.

CAKE
Are you? I mean, with them?

CAT
I suppose. Ed’s happy, so I guess I
should be happy for him.

CAKE
You should be, Cat. Your dad’s a good
man, he deserves some happiness...And a
little sumpn’ sumpn’. After all those
years polishing the Bishop, he must be
sticking it to Gloria pretty good.

Cat rolls her eyes as Cake laughs.

 26.

CAT
Now that’s just nasty!

But Cat can’t help laughing herself. Cake stops laughing,

turns serious.

CAKE
(reticently)
So how’s Achilles? Has he cut down on
the drinking?

CAT
I think so. That three-week suspension
seemed to knock some sense into him.
That and Portia putting her foot down.
I have to say, she really is something,
Cake. A lot more than a pretty face.

CAKE
So they’re doing alright then? I mean,
dealing with all the pressure?

CAT
Seem to be.

Dallas pokes his head into the bedroom.

DALLAS
Come on, Red, before the hot water runs
out.

She gestures “Just a sec.”

CAT
Cake, my man needs me.

CAKE
Well, I wouldn’t want to come between
you and a good poke.

CAT
At least not twice in one day.

CAKE
Skank.

CAT
I love you, Cake.

CAKE
I love you too, Cat.
 27.

INT. TINY APARTMENT – DAY

After she hangs up, Cake looks at a PHOTO on the night

table. It’s a snapshot of Cat, Dallas, Achilles and her on
the deck of her parent’s lake house, taken Fourth of July
weekend. She favors Achilles, whose arm is around her
shoulder; her arm’s around his waist. Both smiling.

Cake rests her head on her arms and sighs. OFF Cake
staring wistfully at the photo...

INT. DELTA HOUSE (KITCHEN) – DAY

Bella, fresh-faced sorority girl, is having a bowl of

fruit. Her best friend, Jeni Kim, comes in –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Betty”

JENI
‘Morning, Bella.

BELLA
Hey.

Jeni makes a beeline to the fridge, grabs a YOGURT and

brings it to the table, sits across from Bella.

JENI
When’d you get home? I didn’t hear you
come in last night.

BELLA
I got in late so I just crashed on a
sofa in the study. I didn’t want to
wake you.

JENI
Thanks...Bella, what’s going on with
you?

BELLA
What do you mean?

JENI
All this sneaking around lately. And
your grades are slipping.

BELLA
What do you know about my grades?
 28.

JENI
I know you got a C-minus on your Lit
paper.
(off Bella’s reaction)
You left your paper on the bed. That’s
not like you, Bella.

BELLA
It’s one paper. It’s nothing to worry
about okay.

JENI
(concerned)
Are you sure? Because if there’s
something going on, you know you can
talk to me. About anything.

BELLA
I know, Jeni.
(smiles)
Stop worrying so much...Mom.

JENI
Oh, no you didn’t!

They share a warm smile.

INT. CLASSROOM – DAY

Students take notes and listen intently as Elyse Johansson

gives a review before finals –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Wilma”

ELYSE
You won’t be doing yourself any favors
if you ignore Bishop Nazir-Ali’s thesis
on Secularism, Multiculturalism and the
Islamic Threat. I also recommend a
careful review of Pope Benedict the
sixteenth’s writings on St.
Augustine...

Warren “iPhone” Sitren scratches out notes, trying to keep

up. His girlfriend, Suzy Johnson, leans over and whispers
to him –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE “Betty”

 29.

SUZY
Don’t worry, Warren, I got it.

IPHONE
Thanks.

Elyse glances at her watch.

ELYSE
Just a reminder, next week’s exam will
count for fifty percent of your final
grade. Some of you are right on the
border of pass-fail; you know who you
are. And please remember, I have
office hours from three to six today
and Thursday. I’ll also be checking e-
mail if you have questions as you
prepare for the exam. That’s it for
today. Good luck.

Students begin filing out. Elyse gathers her papers.

INT. CORRIDOR – MOMENTS LATER

Suzy and iPhone exit the classroom and head down the
corridor, talking. Portia is headed for another classroom
when she sees them.

PORTIA
(calls out)
Warren.

As always, iPhone is happy to see her. Suzy, not so much.

IPHONE
Hey, Portia.

PORTIA
Hi, Warren. Suzy. Warren, Lee needs
some help later after practice. We’ve
got a new plasma t.v. and of course he
can’t bring it home on that silly
motorcycle of his.

IPHONE
Sure thing Por—

SUZY
Warren, you’ve got to study for
Professor Johansson’s final.
 30.

IPHONE
Yeah, I know, but it’ll just take me a
few minutes to help Q.B. out.

PORTIA
(clocks Suzy’s ‘tude)
Thanks, Warren. I’ve got class now.
See you later.

Portia and Suzy exchange a glance before Portia turns to go

into her classroom. iPhone starts down the corridor.

SUZY
I’ll catch up in a sec, Pookie.

Suzy follows Portia, catches her at the door.

PORTIA
Yes, Suzy?

SUZY
Portia, Warren can’t help Achilles
tonight. He’s behind in Ethics. If he
doesn’t get at least a B on the final
he could be suspended for the post-
season.

PORTIA
Don’t be silly, Suzy. Coach Donahue
won’t bench Warren. He’ll have him
take the exam again after the season if
he has to but he won’t suspend him.

SUZY
It’s not just the test, Portia...

PORTIA
Then what is it, Suzy?

SUZY
Portia...Warren’s not your personal
assistant.

PORTIA
(taken aback)
Suzy, I don’t think Warren is my
personal assistant.

SUZY
Then stop treating him as if he were.
 31.

PORTIA
What?

SUZY
Look, he won’t say no to you because he
believes in all of that “protect the
quarterback” crap.

PORTIA
It’s not “crap”, Suzy. It’s why he’s
here.

SUZY
He’s “here” to get a degree in
Architecture.

PORTIA
And what do you think pays for that
degree?
(then)
Look Suzy, I get it. You don’t like
that Warren puts Lee ahead of you
sometimes. I understand. Believe me,
I’ve been there.

SUZY
Have you, Portia? I don’t think so.
I’ve seen how you’ve wrapped Warren and
Ronnie and the other offensive linemen
around your little finger. It’s you
who comes first, not just Achilles.

PORTIA
(surprised)
Is that what this is about? You’re
jealous? Suzy, really, I would think
of all women a Delta would have
learned: you only have one person to
blame if you can’t control your man.

SUZY
Hmmm. That’s funny coming from someone
who’s man can’t seem to control himself
when it came to a certain Delta.

They stare icily at each other until –

IPHONE (O.S.)
(calling out)
Suzy, you coming, babe?
 32.

SUZY
Be right there, Pookie.

Suzy turns away from Portia and walks toward iPhone, takes
his hand and they continue down the corridor together.
Portia watches them until other students begin filing into
her classroom. Then she goes inside.

INT. CLASSROOM – LATER

Portia sits near the front of class taking notes in a well-

worn SPIRAL NOTEBOOK. At the front of the classroom, Jean-
Louis Tissot, the handsome young West African professor, is
wrapping up his lecture on Geopolitical Studies.

JEAN-LOUIS
Ah yes, I almost forgot to tell you.
I’ll be leaving the country for
Thanksgiving break and I won’t be
checking e-mails. So please, if you
have any questions about your final
term papers, come see me this week...

Students begin gathering their belongings to leave. When

Portia gets to the front of the room, she and Jean-Louis
exchange a smile.

JEAN-LOUIS
And how are you today, Mrs. Addams?

PORTIA
Very good, Professor Tissot. So you’re
leaving the country?

JEAN-LOUIS
Yes, I’m returning to Benin for a week
to tend to family matters.

PORTIA
I didn’t’ know you were from Benin.
It’s a lovely country.

JEAN-LOUIS
(surprised)
You’ve been?
 33.

PORTIA
Yes. I’ve been twice in fact.
(off his reaction)
My father and I did missionary work
throughout West Africa. Benin was the
last country we visited together.

JEAN-LOUIS
Just when I thought I couldn’t be more
impressed, you prove yet again that
there’s more to you than meets the eye.

Achilles shows up in the doorway of the classroom.

ACHILLES
Portia, are you ready?

PORTIA
Oh, professor Tissot, have you met my
husband?

Achilles comes in. Heimmediately picks up on the vibe

between Portia and the good professor.

JEAN-LOUIS
Hello, Achilles. It’s a pleasure to
finally meet you.

ACHILLES
(shakes his hand)
Professor.

PORTIA
Professor Tissot is going back to Benin
next week. Isn’t that a coincidence?
That’s the last place that I went with
Daddy to do missionary work.

ACHILLES
Yeah, I guess. So you’re going to
Africa? What about the rest of the
semester?

JEAN-LOUIS
I’m back a week after students return
from Thanksgiving break. Like your
wife, most students who take my class
are very self-motivated. They’ll have
no trouble finding a more interesting
way to use those two hours of class.
 34.

PORTIA
(admiring smile)
Professor Tissot is being modest,
Achilles. All of his students look
forward to his lectures. I know I’ll
miss them next week.

We read Achilles’ reaction. He’s not digging this dude at

all.

ACHILLES
Well, it was nice to meet you,
professor. Portia, we really should
get going.

PORTIA
Yes, you’re right. Well safe travels,
professor Tissot, and enjoy your home
and your visit with your family.

JEAN-LOUIS
Thank you, I will. Achilles.

After they’ve left, Jean-Louis begins to gather his

belongings. He notices something on top of a student desk.
ANGLE ON Portia’s spiral notebook. It’s now that we
realize it’s the same notebook she left behind before.

Jean-Louis goes to the desk, picks up the notebook. OFF

Jean-Louis considering we...

FADE OUT.

END OF ACT TWO

 35.

ACT THREE

FADE IN:

INT. INDOOR PRACTICE FACILITY – DAY

Bob Garcia is calling the shots on the sideline as the Sea

Devils go through a scrimmage. Billy stands in the end
zone, trying to give his top assistant some space.

BOB
(calls to field)
Alright, two minutes to go! Eighty
yards to pay dirt! Move ‘em down the
field, Achilles!

IN THE HUDDLE

Achilles checks his wristband for a play.

ACHILLES
Here we go. Time to make something
happen. Spread set, strong right, 424
Tomahawk. On one.

They break the huddle and come to the line of scrimmage.

ACHILLES
Blue 77! Blue 77!

Across the line, linebacker Nate “Brew” Brewster shouts:

NATE
Watch the screen! Watch the screen!

Achilles clocks the defensive shift. He almost smiles.

ACHILLES
Blue 77! Hut!

He takes the snap from iPhone, drops back into the pocket.
Wham! Offensive guard Ronnie Taylor blocks the crap out of
a blitzing Brew just before the linebacker reaches
Achilles.

Achilles rolls left, sees speedy wide receiver Jet Johnson

breaking to an open spot on the field and fires a bullet.
We follow the ball as it spirals through the air...

SMASH CUT TO:

 36.

EXT. MEMORIAL STADIUM – DAY

MONTAGE #1 (UTAH STATE GAME)

...Jet catches the ball and streaks down the field to the
end zone, leaving hapless Utah State defenders in his wake;

Achilles lights up the Utah State defense, passing and

scrambling like a human highlight reel, hitting Jet, Greg
Ericsson, Crash Davis, and Junior Tuiososopo for touchdown
after touchdown;

Brew, Dallas, lineman Kwame Epstein and the Sea Devils

defense manhandle the Aggies offense, making sacks, forcing
fumbles; cornerback Shawn Ellis intercepts a pass and runs
it back for a touchdown;

On the sideline, Bob calls the plays and celebrates every

big play with pumped fists, raised arms and high-fives,
while in the coaches’ booth Billy smiles down and enjoys
Bob’s success;

Over this, FANS revel in the shellacking the Devils are

putting on Utah State; 55,000 voices sing the KC & the
Sunshine Band ‘80s hit, “That’s the way, uh-huh-uh-huh, I
like it, uh-huh-uh-huh!” as we...

END MONTAGE

INT. DONAHUE BREAKFAST ROOM – DAY

Billy comes into the room wearing fishing togs, kisses Gale
on the cheek.

BILLY
‘Morning.

GALE
Good morning, Billy honey. How was the
catch?

BILLY
Dallas and me did alright. Caught our
limit. Good morning, Mom.

Gale’s mother Rose Ryan smiles –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Betty”

 37.

ROSE
Good morning, Billy Boy.

BILLY
Good morning, Gracie.

Gracie is playing with Duncan, who’s making a mess of his

applesauce in his high chair.

GRACIE
Hi, Coach.

BILLY
(to Gale)
Where’s J.R.?

GALE
Still asleep. Billy, he came in late
again last night.

BILLY
How late?

GALE
Too late.

Gracie clocks that J.R. is in trouble.

BILLY
You want me to talk to him?

GALE
Yes, honey. I don’t want to have to
worry about him. You know how dangerous
the roads can get this time of year.
Gracie, Sweetheart, you’d better get
ready. I need your help with the
shopping for Thanksgiving dinner.

GRACIE
Sure thing, Mrs. Donahue.

She eats a last piece of melon and stands to leave. Duncan

reacts, unhappy that his playmate is leaving.

GRACIE
Ah, you wanna come with Gracie while
she gets dressed? Is it alright, Mrs.
Donahue.
 38.

GALE
Just keep a close eye on him.

Gracie takes Duncan from the high chair and they exit.

GALE
Billy, Charlotte and Ronald will join
us tomorrow for Thanksgiving as well as
the Sussman’s and Mimi Garcia.

BILLY
Mimi?

GALE
Yes. And the kids. Is there a
problem?

BILLY
No. No problem. It’s just I invited
Bob over. Without Mimi and the kids,
he’ll be alone for Thanksgiving.

GALE
Well, shouldn’t he be? You’ll just
have to uninvited him.

BILLY
(reluctant)
Yeah, sure. Of course.

INT. J.R.’S ROOM – DAY

J.R. is sound asleep in bed. The door opens and Billy

comes in.

BILLY
J.R. J.R.!

The teen stirs. Reluctantly opens his eyes.

J.R.
(sleepily)
Dad? What is it?

BILLY
J.R., your mom said you came in past
curfew again last night. Way past
curfew.
 39.

J.R.
(reacts, groans)
Dad, come on! I’m 17 years old! Did
you have to be in the house by 10:30
when you were 17?

BILLY
It’s midnight on the weekend and we’re
not talking about me we’re talking
about you. Traipsing in here past one
just isn’t going to fly, son.

J.R.
It wasn’t that much past one, Dad.

BILLY
Doesn’t matter how much past one it
was, it was an hour past your curfew.
One more fail like this, J.R., and
you’ll have your butt in this house by
10 o’clock every night - that includes
on the weekends.

J.R. sits up in protest.

J.R.
(loudly)
Jesus, Dad, come on!

BILLY
Sounds like I’ve made myself clear.

Billy turns to leave. J.R. falls back onto his bed, flings
his pillows.

INT. HALLWAY OUTSIDE J.R.’S ROOM – CONTINUOUS

As Billy steps out of the room, we can hear J.R. having a

fit inside. Gracie is coming down the hallway. Fresh from
the shower, she’s in a robe with Duncan on her hip. Billy
and Gracie exchange a look as he passes her.

INT. MALL FOOD COURT – DAY

J.R. is with his well-to-do high school friends, among them

ASHLEIGH, FERGIE, ALYSSA, TODD, CRAIG and J.R.’s girlfriend
Barbara “Barbie” Pollack –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Wilma”

 40.

BARBIE
The concert is going to be fantastic.
I can hardly wait.

ALYSSA
I know. I have all of Blood Arm’s
songs on my iPod.

FERGIE
You got the tickets online, right,
Craig?

CRAIG
(henpecked)
Yes, Fergie, I got the tickets.

TODD
Dude, how can you stand to be so
whipped?!

ASHLEIGH
Stop it, Todd. Just because a guy
actually listens to his girlfriend
doesn’t mean he’s whipped. You should
try it sometimes. You might be
surprised what it gets you.

TODD
What, you mean there’s more than the
sex?

Ashleigh slaps her boyfriend on the arm. Meanwhile, J.R.

is checking out who’s crossing the food court toward them.

GREG
Lil’ J.R., what up, dog?

J.R.
Hey, Greg.

J.R. ignores the ‘Lil’ and he ignores Gracie, who is quite

comfortable with Greg’s arm around her waist. Craig and
Todd are awestruck by Greg, who is the Sea Devils’ biggest
star after Achilles.

CRAIG
Hey, Greg! What up, man?!

GREG
(smiles)
It’s all good, dog.
 41.

TODD
Yo, Greg, man you had a great game on
Saturday. You ready to tear it up
again against New Mexico State?

GREG
We’ll see. Feeling pretty good about
our chances though.

Gracie and Barbie do their best to avoid eye contact.

GRACIE
We should get going, Greg. I’ve got to
be home by four.

GREG
Yeah, okay, baby.

Greg and Gracie walk away. The high schoolers watch them
go still appreciating their brush with greatness. J.R.
watches until Greg slides his hand down to Gracie’s ass.

INT. CAFÉ – DAY

A quaint, hip café. At a table we FIND Charlotte Webb

waiting. She looks up and smiles –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Wilma”

CHARLOTTE
Elle darling.

Approaching the table is Gabrielle Woods –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Betty”

GABRIELLE
(kisses Charlotte’s cheek)
Charlotte, hi!
(sits down)
I’m so glad you were able to meet me
for lunch today.

CHARLOTTE
It’s my pleasure, Elle. When I heard
you were executive producing a news
documentary on women in sports, of
course I was honored that you thought
to include me.
 42.

GABRIELLE
No show about women power brokers in
Division One college sports would be
complete without my godmother.

CHARLOTTE
Thank you, dear.

A WAITRESS stops by to take their order.

CAFÉ – LATER

Charlotte and Gabrielle talk over lunch.

CHARLOTTE
And are you all settled into your new
place in Seattle?

GABRIELLE
I haven’t had much time for settling.
The new job’s kept me pretty busy.

CHARLOTTE
Yes, it sounds as though it has.
(beat)
Elle...listen, dear, I know you’ve
probably grown tired of hearing this
from your mother but...

GABRIELLE
Charlotte, if this is about me and
Billy, you’re right. It’s very tiring
and I’d really rather not –

CHARLOTTE
(interrupts)
Well, I’m afraid you’ll have to hear it
at least one more time, dear.

Gabrielle sighs heavily. Takes a drink of iced tea. Her

expression says, “Okay, have at it.”

CHARLOTTE
I’m not judging you, Elle. I don’t
doubt that what you and Billy feel for
one another is genuine. And I’m sure
it’s wonderful. But you’re an
intelligent woman, Elle; you know that
you are heading for disaster. Billy is
incapable of leaving Gale and even if
(MORE)
 43.

CHARLOTTE (CONT’D.)
by some miracle he managed to tear
himself away from her, she would never
allow the two of you to be happy.

Beat.

GABRIELLE
Is that it, Charlotte? Done now?

CHARLOTTE
Yes.

GABRIELLE
Now it’s my turn. And I’ll tell you
exactly what I told Mom. I love Billy
and he loves me. We’re going to be
together. No matter what that means.

CHARLOTTE
Even if it means ruining your lives and
those of the people who care about you
the most?

OFF Gabrielle’s emotion...

INT. WILDFLOWER INN (SUITE) – SUNSET

Billy and Gabrielle are in bed, kissing after making love.

When they stop –

BILLY
Do you have any idea how alive I feel
right now?

GABRIELLE
(smiles)
Maybe an idea.

BILLY
Elle...that night...when I was lying on
my back in the rain...the last thing I
remember before blacking out...was
this...Being like this with you.
Holding you in my arms, feeling your
skin against mine, smelling your hair,
the warmth of your breath on my
face...I felt alive, Elle.

She traces the scars on his face with her fingertips.

 44.

GABRIELLE
I’ll always be here for you, Billy.

INT. PLAYERS’ LOUNGE – DAY

Players hang out, play video games, casually watch Sports

Center. They perk up when a PHOTO of Achilles and Portia
pops ONSCREEN next to one of Becky Van Helsing.

ANCHOR (V.O.)
KTLA in Los Angeles is reporting that
Heisman hopeful Achilles Addams has
fathered a child outside of his
marriage. According to reports, the
junior quarterback out of Washington
Tech – who is married to his high
school sweetheart, Portia Addams - is
the father of a 13-month-old girl born
to Rebecca Van Helsing, daughter of
multimillionaire industrialist Clarke
Van Helsing. Achilles and Portia
Addams were married last November 13,
the same day Ms. Van Helsing’s daughter
was born, according to KTLA.

iPhone is among the players who gather around the

television. Portia’s “Trophy” advertisement is ONSCREEN.

ANCHOR (V.O.)
Addams’ 19-year-old wife is the subject
of one of the most provocative and
popular Heisman PR campaigns in years.
The ad, which is in magazines, on web
sites and even in Times Square,
features the very attractive Mrs.
Addams in body paint that resembles
Addams’ game jersey and includes the
tagline, “I’m not the only trophy my
husband deserves.” Neither Addams, his
wife or Ms. Van Helsing have confirmed
the reports, but KTLA cites a birth
certificate that lists Addams, 20 years
old, as the father of the 23-year-old
Ms. Van Helsing’s daughter.

OFF iPhone’s dismay we...

FADE OUT.

END OF ACT THREE

 45.

ACT FOUR

FADE IN:

INT. ACHILLES & PORTIA’S APARTMENT – DAY

Portia sits on the sofa watching another NEWS ANCHOR on

television report on Achilles’ Love child. There’s a
steely calmness about her. Achilles stands behind her,
watching the screen in guilty silence.

When the anchor finishes her report, Portia presses the

“Off” button on the remote control and stands. It’s now
that we notice she’s wearing a pretty dress. She looks at
Achilles for a beat then crosses to the door. She stops
long enough for him to help her with her coat. He slips on
his leather jacket and they exit the apartment.

EXT. TRZCINSKI DRIVEWAY – DAY

ANGLE ON Cat’s piece of shit Mustang from the rear as it

pulls into the driveway. When it stops and the engine is
shut off, Achilles gets out and goes around to open the
door for Portia. They walk to the front door of the home
and he rings the doorbell.

INT. TRZCINSKI HOME - DAY

Gloria Trzcinski opens the door to Achilles and Portia, who

smiles.

GLORIA
(big smile)
Achilles! Portia! Come in!

It’s Thanksgiving and the house is full of Trzcinski family

and friends. Ed Trzcinski comes over to greet the couple.

ED
Portia! Achilles! I’m so glad you
could make it.

PORTIA
(to Ed and Gloria)
Thank you for inviting us.
 46.

GLORIA
Well, dear, it’s Thanksgiving.
Everybody should be with family on
Thanksgiving.

Portia gets her meaning, smiles warmly.

ED
Here, let me take your coats.

Cat comes over, welcomes Portia with a hug and a kiss.

CAT
Hi, Portia. Einstein.

PORTIA
Thanks for letting Lee borrow your car,
Cat.

CAT
No problem, Portia.
(to annoy Achilles)
He really should ditch that stupid
motorcycle. It’s nothing but trouble.

Cat loops arms with Portia and guides her into the crowd,
but not before secretly making a face at Achilles. Ed pats
Achilles on the shoulder sympathetically.

INT. DONAHUE HOME – SUNSET

Thanksgiving dinner is over and the Donahues and their

guests are spread out in cliques throughout the house.

IN THE KITCHEN

The married women listen as Mathilda “Mattie” Weiss talks

about her honeymoon –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Wilma”

MATTIE
I’d never seen a real giraffe or lion
before in my life. Not even in a zoo.
It was truly marvelous!

KENDRA
Oh, Mattie, it sounds wonderful. A
safari in Kenya. That was just an
incredible idea for a honeymoon.
 47.

MATTIE
I can’t take the credit. It was
Darryl’s idea. It was a dream of his
since he was a boy to go on a safari.
I’d traveled a great deal when I was
younger, but never to Africa. So...

DONNA
You look so happy, Mattie. Darryl is
such a good man.

Mattie smiles appreciatively. Mimi reacts and we sense her

twinge of sadness.

MATTIE
I am happy. And he’s wunderbar!

Darryl comes in behind Mattie. He’s holding Duncan.

DARRYL
Who’s wonderful?

Mattie turns and smiles adoringly –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Betty” (yes, Mattie’s both)

MATTIE
Hi, darling. I was just talking about
little Duncan.

DARRYL
(skeptical)
Is that right?

He hands the baby over to Gale and then kisses Mattie.

GALE
My little sugarplum is wunderbar, but
don’t you believe her for a second,
Darryl honey. Your wife was talking
about you.

Darryl and Mattie smile at each other, clearly in love.

We hear a DOORBELL RING.

IN THE GAME ROOM

J.R. and his friends shoot pool. Greg comes in looking

sexy-cool, dressed head-to-toe in black. The teenagers are
all smiles at the stylish receiver. All except J.R.
 48.

CRAIG
Hi, Greg. J.R. didn’t tell us Coach
Donahue invited players over for
Thanksgiving.

GREG
I’m not here for Thanksgiving. Me and
Gracie are going up to Vancouver for a
show and a little night life.

ASHLEIGH
How romantic. Todd, why don’t you ever
take me to Vancouver?

TODD
Oh, jeez!

GREG
(laughs)
Sorry, dog. Didn’t mean to create any
strife.

GRACIE (O.S.)
So here you are.

They all turn to see Gracie in the doorway. She’s stunning

in a little black number. She gives Greg a peck on the
lips. J.R. covers his jealousy but Barbie catches on.

THE GREAT ROOM

Is full of guests talking and watching the Lions-Jets game

ON TELEVISION.

CHAMP
You just know the press is going to
turn this into one of those ridiculous
reality shows, Coach.

BILLY
That’s pretty much what they exist for
these days, isn’t it?

CHAMP
I don’t think for a second that it’s a
coincidence the media broke this story
right when the Heisman competition is
heating up.
 49.

SASHA
You’re right about that, Champ. You
can’t have a big story without a little
bit of controversy.

KENDRA
...Or more than a little bit of someone
else’s misery.

Kendra has come in with a cold glass of beer for Champ,

hands another to Billy. She and Sasha exchange a look.

CHAMP
Thanks, babe.

BILLY
Thank you, Kendra.

KENDRA
I’m sure the media hasn’t given a
second thought to what this is doing to
Portia.

OFF Sasha covering her guilt...

INT. TRZCINSKI HOME – NIGHT

ANGLE ON a CHOCOLATE CAKE as it’s being cut for the first

time. Portia gives slices to the KIDS, who gather around
with paper plates and smiles. She looks up at Dallas.

PORTIA
Dallas! This cake’s for the kids.

He gives her a little boy grin, holds out a paper plate.

DALLAS
But they’ve all got a piece, Portia.
And besides, Red made it. I want to
see if she’s any good at baking.

Dallas and Portia glance over at Cat, who’s smiling at them

from across the room. Portia relents, cuts a piece of cake
for him...

Cat finds Achilles watching the Lions-Jets game with other

guests. She taps him hard on the shoulder.

CAT
Can we talk, Einstein?
 50.

He looks up, realizes it’s not really a question.

CAT’S BEDROOM

Cat enters, followed by Achilles. She closes the door.

Before he can say a word she jabs him in the chest. “Ow!”

CAT
Asshole!

ACHILLES
Not that it’s any of your business, but
I didn’t even know about Angel until
Becky told me about her last week.

CAT
Angel?! Are you kidding me?!

ACHILLES
It’s a good name...Hey, I’m already
taking enough shit at home, Lesbot. Do
I really need to take more from you?

CAT
What you need is a kick in the balls.

ACHILLES
And how do you know Portia hasn’t
already done that?

The thought brings a brief smile to Cat’s face. Then –

CAT
How is she taking it - your whole
“Can’t keep my dick in my pants when it
comes to snotty sorority sluts” thing?

ACHILLES
How do you think she’s taking it? Look
Lesbot, I know I messed up, but in my
defense the last time I even saw Becky
was two years ago. And I haven’t even
seriously looked at another girl since
Portia and I got married.

CAT
You’re just a real prince, aren’t you?

A KNOCK on the door and they both turn to it. The door
opens and Portia eases her head inside.
 51.

PORTIA
It’s getting late, Lee. We should get
going now.

ACHILLES
Right, babe, okay.

CAT
I’m so glad you came, Portia.

PORTIA
So am I, Cat.

The girls embrace and kiss cheek-to-cheek.

EXT. TRZCINSKI HOME – NIGHT

Gloria hugs Portia goodnight in the doorway.

PORTIA
(beautiful smile)
I had a lovely time, Mrs. Trzcinski.
Thank you for having us.

GLORIA
I hope we’ll see you back for dinner
again soon, dear.

Cat embraces and kisses Portia again. Then Achilles and

Portia walk to the Mustang. He opens the door for her then
goes around, gets inside.

INT. MUSTANG – MOVING – NIGHT

Achilles and Portia drive through the streets of Maitland

in silence. Then –

ACHILLES
Mrs. Trzcinski is really sweet, isn’t
she?
(beat, off her silence)
Everybody was really nice tonight. And
you were just great, Portia.

He looks at her. She just stares straight ahead. He turns

his attention back to the road.
 52.

INT. ACHILLES & PORTIA’S APARTMENT – NIGHT

Portia and Achilles enter. He helps her with her coat,

puts it in the closet along with his own. She goes to the
bedroom.

In the bedroom, Portia undresses, puts on a “Property of

Washington Tech Football” t-shirt, then goes to the
bathroom. Achilles has just finished brushing his teeth,
puts his toothbrush back in the holder. Portia takes her
toothbrush from the holder, applies toothpaste and begins
brushing.

When she leaves the bathroom she goes back into the
bedroom, comes out to the living room with a pillow and a
blanket and hands them to Achilles. They look in each
other’s eyes for a beat, then she turns to go back in the
bedroom. He puts the pillow and blanket on the sofa and
starts to undress.

INT. DONAHUE MASTER BEDROOM – NIGHT

Billy is in bed pretending to be asleep. Gale comes out of

the bathroom wearing the old Texas A&M t-shirt she knows
turns him on. She slides into bed behind him, caresses his
shoulders and kisses the back of his neck to arouse him.

BILLY
Babe, how ‘bout in the morning?

She slips a hand under the sheets and around front.

GALE
Feels like somebody doesn’t want to
wait ‘til morning.

BILLY
Gale, babe, I’m so tired. I wouldn’t
be any good. And you know what the
doctor said...

She kisses, bits and licks his ears, strokes him underneath
the sheet.

GALE
Billy honey, it’s been two weeks. The
doctor says it’s fine now...
(rolls him onto his back)
Besides, you don’t have to do anything.
Just leave it all to me.
 53.

She kisses him deeply and climbs on top. She sits up and
pulls off the t-shirt, looks down at him with a lustful
grin then mounts him.

GALE
(moans with pleasure)
Yes...That’s it Billy Boy...That’s
it...

EXT. DONAHUE HOME - NIGHT

Gracie kisses Greg goodnight then gets out of his car. He

backs out of the driveway as she gets to the front door.

INT. DONAHUE HOME – NIGHT

Gracie takes off her coat, hangs it in the closet and heads
to the kitchen.

IN THE KITCHEN

She crosses to the refrigerator, pulls out a WATER BOTTLE.

When she turns to leave she’s face-to-face with J.R.

GRACIE
J.R.! You startled me. What are you
doing here?

J.R.
I live here. Remember?

GRACIE
What’s the matter with you, J.R.,
sneaking up on me like that?

J.R.
Do you know what time it is?

GRACIE
No, but why do I think you’re going to
tell me?

J.R.
It’s one in the morning. Past curfew.

GRACIE
Mr. and Mrs. Donahue gave me permission
to stay out later tonight. I’m 19 and
in college. Rank has its privileges.
 54.

She brushes past him. He grabs her arm and spins her back
around.

GRACIE
Hey!

J.R.
Who do you think you are, coming in
here, dressing and acting like some
little slut?!

GRACIE
Keep your voice down. You’re going to
wake Mr. and Mrs. Donahue.

J.R.
Don’t you mean “Mom” and “Dad”, “Sis”?

GRACIE
You’re full of shit, J.R., and I’m
going to bed.

She tries to leave but he grabs her arm again. This time
he drags her, protesting, through the mud room and the
laundry room, outside to the patio.

EXT. PATIO – NIGHT

Gracie finally snatches her arm away.

GRACIE
J.R. stop this right now or I’ll
scream! I mean it!

J.R.
You mean it?! You mean like when you
said you hate jocks? What was it you
said about them, “big muscles, little
dicks.” Well, Greg’s got big muscles,
does he have a little dick?

GRACIE
You’re being an ass, J.R.

J.R.
Or do you mean it like when you said
you would always love me?
 55.

GRACIE
(reacting, still loving him)
You quit me, J.R., remember? You
cheated on me and you lied to me!

J.R.
Shut up! You make me sick! You come
in here and totally change your colors
to fool everybody into thinking you’re
something you’re not. But I know who
you are, Gracie. A slut doesn’t change
her spots. I know exactly who you are!

GRACIE
What’s that supposed to mean?!

J.R.
Greg. Jet. Junior. Kumar.
(beat)
Jamal!

She bores into him with her eyes. Digging up the memory of
the man who raped and abused her is beyond the pale.

GRACIE
Screw you!

J.R.
(scornful laugh)
I’m probably the only white boy you’ve
ever screwed.

She SLAPS him hard, spins around and storms back inside.
He stands there holding his face.

INT. HALLWAY/GRACIE’S ROOM – NIGHT

Gracie is coming down the hallway toward her room, in

tears. J.R. runs up the stairs after her.

J.R.
Gracie. Wait. I’m –

She goes into her room and closes the door. Before she can
lock it he pushes inside, closes the door behind him.
She’s nearly overwrought, but keeps her voice low.

GRACIE
Get out of my room, J.R.! Now!
 56.

J.R.
(contrite)
Please, Gracie, I’m sorry. I’m sorry.
I’m sorry. I didn’t mean those things
I said. I swear I didn’t...It’s
just...It’s so hard, Gracie. Seeing
you every day and knowing what we
had...and now seeing you so happy with
somebody else. It’s just so hard,
Gracie. Please, I’m sorry.

Beat. They look at each other.

GRACIE
(calm)
J.R., please leave my room.

INT. DONAHUE MASTER BEDROOM – NIGHT

Gale has a powerful climax and collapses on top of Billy.

They’re both winded and sweaty.

GALE
(sighing)
My gawd, Billy...that was good.

She snuggles in, kisses his cheek, closes her eyes to fall
asleep. OFF Billy staring at the ceiling...

INT. ACHILLES & PORTIA’S APARTMENT – NIGHT

CLOSE ON Achilles’ eyes. PULL BACK and we see that he’s on

the sofa, staring at the ceiling. He HEARS something,
looks toward the bedroom door. SLOW ZOOM on the
door...Inside we FIND Portia, curled up on top of the bed,
softly crying her eyes out.

DISSOLVE TO:

INT. RICHARD & VALERIE’S APARTMENT – DAY

We hear a woman a GRUNTING. The way women tennis players

do when they strike the ball hard. Then we hear a BASH of
metal against something and a loud CRASH.

REVEAL an infuriated Valerie Kim in her living room –

FREEZE. SUPERIMPOSE: “Wilma”

 57.

She swings an ALUMINUM BASEBALL BAT, smashing a lamp then a

vase then a picture on the wall then the wall itself –
grunting angrily with each blow.

She stops. Breathing heavily, she calmly moves a strand of

hair from her face with a perfectly manicured finger.
Stares at THE 60-INCH PLASMA TELEVISION mounted on the
wall.

Onscreen an ATTRACTIVE ANCHORWOMAN is giving the latest

dish on what the media have dubbed the “Heiress & the
Heisman Candidate.”

ANGLE ON IMAGES of Achilles and Becky on the plasma screen.

Then Valerie SCREAMS bloody murder and swings the bat at

the screen – SMASH! – as we...

FADE OUT.

END OF EPISODE