WRITING INTRODUCTORY PARAGRAPH

An introductory paragraph is the first paragraph in writing. Its function is to lead the readers
into the essay. Consequently, it should give the readers a preview of the essay. If it captures
their attention, the readers will find it easier to follow the writer’s flow of expression. In order
to attract the readers’ attention, ideally, the introductory paragraph should be interesting.

The introductory paragraph consists of two parts.

1. The first part is general statement about the subject to attract readers’ attention
2. The second part is a thesis statement, which specifies the topic or the plan of the
paper. The function of thesis statement is to control the idea of the paper.

Good introductory paragraph has some characteristics. They are:

1. The introductory paragraph should introduce the topic.

2. The introductory paragraph should indicate generally how the topic is going to be
developed, whether the essay is to discuss causes, effect, reasons, or examples.
Whether the essay is going to describe, narrate, or explain something. Since this
discussion is about expository, it should explain something.
3. The introductory paragraph should contain thesis statement.
4. The introductory paragraph should be inviting.

There are four basic types of introductory paragraph. They are:

1. The first is turnabout type of introduction. In this type, the writer opens with a
statement contrary to his or her actual thesis. Look at the following example:

We live in era where television is the national pastime. Since the invention of television set,
people have been spending more of their free time watching television than doing anything
else. Many of the television addicts feel that this particular pastime is not bad one; indeed,
they argue that people can learn a great deal watching television. I am sure if you look long
and hard enough; you can probably find some programs that are educationally motivating.
But, for most part, I say that watching television is a waste of time (Smalley and Hank,
1986:228)

1. The second type, the dramatic entrance, is a type of introduction in which the author
opens with narrative, descriptive, or dramatic example. Look at the following
example:

The rain pours down as if running from a faucet, lightning streaks across the dark
restless sky, and thunder pounds the roof and walls of the house. All of a sudden the
wind kicks up. Trees sway madly back and forth; loose objects are picked up and
thrown all way round. The house streaks and moans with every gust of wind. Windows
are broken by pieces of shingle from a neighbour’s roof or by loose objects picked by the
wind. Power lines snap like thread. The unprepared house and its occupants are in
grave prepared for hurricane approaches. Had they prepared for hurricane, they might
not be in such danger. Indeed, careful preparation before a hurricane is essential to life
and property (Smalley and Hank, 1986:260)

1. The third type is relevant quotation. In this way, the writer opens with the quotation
relevant to the topic. Look at the following example:

“As an airplane or missile becomes more complicated,” warned James fallows in his
1981 book National Defence,” the probability that all its parts will be working at the
same time goes down”. Indeed the reliability and power of modern U.S military
hardware depend heavily on increasingly complex electronic circuits. This worrisome
vulnerability prompted Pentagon officials more than two years ago to launch an
extensive probe of microchip suppliers in order to spot any lax manufacturing practices.
Last week the inquiry produced an indictment against a major electronic company
(Smalley and Hank, 1986:299)

1. The last type is, the Funnel. That is the type of introductory in which the progress of
the idea is from general to specific one. See the following paragraph example:

Travelling to a foreign country is always interesting, especially if it is a country that is

completely different from your own. You can delight in tasting new foods, seeing new
sight, and learning about different customs, some of which may seem very curious. If
you were to visit my country, for instance, you would probably think that my people
have some very strange customs, as these three examples will illustrate (Smalley and
Hank, 1986:143)

Another important thing in introductory paragraph is the existence of thesis statement, thatis
a single sentence that contains an arguable proposition and clearly states the author’s position
on the issue. The thesis statement is said to be the good one as it qualifies the following:

1. The thesis statement appears at the end or near the end of the introductory paragraph.
2. It states the main point of the writer
3. It indicates how the writer will limit and support the main point.
4. It shows how the writer will organize the entire essay.

In addition to those all mentioned above, the thesis statement should follow the following
criteria, they are:

1. The thesis statement should be expressed in a complete sentence.

2. The thesis statement expresses an opinion, attitude, or idea; it does not simply
announce the topic of the essay will develop.
3. The thesis statement should express an opinion; it should not express the fact.
4. The thesis statement should express only one idea toward one topic.

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Introductions

Four Types

An introduction should:

1. Introduce the topic.

2. Indicate how the topic is going to be developed (cause-effect, reasons, examples,
classification, description, narration, or explanation).
3. Contain a thesis statement.
4. Be inviting and entice the reader to continue after reading the first sentence.
Funnel

Reveals background info leading to a focused thesis statement.

Birds, pigs, rats and other animals all have special talents which have been used by humans.
Birds can talk, pigs can find truffles, rats can run wires through walls for plumbers, but no
animal has quite as many special talents as dogs, especially when it comes to helping
ranchers.

Dramatic

Unrolls as an eye-witness account.

Rubble from earthquake-stricken houses is lying everywhere. Precious lives are buried deep
within the piles of dirt, concrete and debris. If rescue workers can locate these souls in time,
their lives may be saved. Dog teams arrive. They will employ their amazing talents in this
emergency situation.

Quotation

Uses a quote to lead to the thesis statement.

"Never trust a man a dog doesn't like." the proverbs says. This somehow implies that dogs can
tell the character of a person before a human can. In many ways this is true: dogs have
amazing talents when it comes to assessing a person's character. But how do they do it? Pet
behaviorists give the following explanations.

Turn About

Starts with the opposite idea and then moves to the focus.

Max was a cute dog, a Tibetan Terrier with a "winning smile", but he had annoying habit of
"lifting his leg" on my furniture if I left him alone for more than a couple of hours. Also,
half-way through our walks, he would roll on his back indicating he had had enough. I would
have to carry him home. Just when I decided to give him up for adoption, he used his
amazing talent as a "chick magnet" to find me the love of my life.

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A Proper
Introduction

Things NOT to do in an introductory paragraph:

 Apologize. Never suggest that you don't know what you're talking about or that
you're not enough of an expert in this matter that your opinion would matter. Your
reader will quickly turn to something else. Avoid phrases like the following:

In my [humble] opinion . . .
I'm not sure about this, but . . .

 Announce your intentions. Do not flatly announce what you are about to do in an
 essay.

In this paper I will . . .

The purpose of this essay is to . . .

Get into the topic and let your reader perceive your purpose in the topic sentence of
your beginning paragraph.

 Use a dictionary or encyclopedia definition.

According to Merriam-Webster's WWWebster Dictionary,

a widget is . . .

Although definitions are extremely useful and it might serve your purpose to devise
your own definition(s) later in the essay, you want to avoid using this hackneyed
beginning to an essay.

 Dilly-dally. Get to it. Move confidently into your essay. Many writers find it useful
to write a warm-up paragraph (or two, even) to get them into the essay, to sharpen
their own idea of what they're up to, and then they go back and delete the running
start.

The following material is adapted from a handout prepared by Harry Livermore for his high
school English classes at Cook High School in Adel, Georgia. It is used here with his
permission.

Students are told from the first time they receive instruction in English composition
that their introductory paragraphs should accomplish two tasks:

1. They should get the reader's interest so that he or she will want to read more.
2. They should let the reader know what the writing is going to be about.

The second task can be accomplished by a carefully crafted thesis statement. Writing thesis
statements can be learned rather quickly. The first task — securing the reader's interest — is
more difficult. It is this task that this discussion addresses.

First, admit that it is impossible to say or do or write anything that will interest everybody.
With that out of the way, the question then becomes: "What can a writer do that will secure
the interest of a fair sized audience?"

Professional writers who write for magazines and receive pay for their work use five
basic patterns to grab a reader's interest:

1. historical review
2. anecdotal
3. surprising statement
4. famous person
5. declarative
What follows is an explanation of each of these patterns with examples from real magazine
articles to illustrate the explanations.

1 Historical review: Some topics are better understood if a brief historical review of the topic
is presented to lead into the discussion of the moment. Such topics might include "a
biographical sketch of a war hero," "an upcoming execution of a convicted criminal," or
"drugs and the younger generation." Obviously there are many, many more topics that could
be introduced by reviewing the history of the topic before the writer gets down to the nitty
gritty of his paper. It is important that the historical review be brief so that it does not take
over the paper.

from "Integration Turns 40" by Juan Williams in Modern Maturity, April/May, 1994.

The victory brought pure elation and joy. It was May 1954, just days after the Supreme
Court's landmark ruling in Brown v. Board of Education of Topeka, Kansas. At NAACP
headquarters in New York the mood was euphoric. Telegrams of congratulations poured in
from around the world; reporters and well-wishers crowded the halls.

[After reaching back forty years ago to bring up the landmark Supreme Court decision that
started school desegregation, this article discusses school segregation in the present time.]

2 Anecdotal: An anecdote is a little story. Everyone loves to listen to stories. Begin a paper
by relating a small story that leads into the topic of your paper. Your story should be a small
episode, not a full blown story with characters and plot and setting. Read some of the
anecdotes in the Reader's Digest special sections such as "Life in These United States" to
learn how to tell small but potent stories. If you do it right, your story will capture the reader's
interest so that he or she will continue to read your paper. One caution: be sure that your story
does not take over the paper. Remember, it is an introduction, not the paper.

from "Going, Going, GONE to the Auction!" by Laurie Goering in Chicago Tribune
Magazine, July 4, 1994.

Mike Cantlon remembers coming across his first auction ten years ago while cruising the back
roads of Wisconsin. He parked his car and wandered into the crowd, toward the auctioneer's
singsong chant and wafting smell of barbecued sandwiches. Hours later, Cantlon emerged
lugging a $22 beam drill-for constructing post-and-beam barns—and a passion for auctions
that has clung like a cocklebur on an old saddle blanket. "It's an addiction," says Cantlon, a
financial planner and one of the growing number of auction fanatics for whom Saturdays will
never be the same.

[This is an anecdote, a little story about one man and his first auction, that is the lead to an
article about auctions. In this article the author explains what auctions are, how to spot
bargains in auctions, what to protect yourself from at auctions, and other facts about auctions
and the people who go to them.]

3 Surprising statement: A surprising statement is a favorite introductory technique of

professional writers. There are many ways a statement can surprise a reader. Sometimes the
statement is surprising because it is disgusting. Sometimes it is joyful. Sometimes it is
shocking. Sometimes it is surprising because of who said it. Sometimes it is surprising
because it includes profanity. Professional writers have honed this technique to a fine edge. It
is not used as much as the first two patterns, but it is used.

from "60 Seconds That Could Save Your Child" by Cathy Perlmutter with Maureen
Sangiorgio in Prevention, September, 1993.
Have a minute? Good. Because that may be all it takes to save the life of a child—your child.
Accidents kill nearly 8000 children under age 15 each year. And for every fatality, 42 more
children are admitted to hospitals for treatment. Yet such deaths and injuries can be avoided
through these easy steps parents can take right now. You don't have a minute to lose.

[This article begins with a surprising, even shocking, statistic, 8000 children die each year
from accidents. The article then lists seven easy actions a person can take to help guard a
child against accidents. These range from turning down the water heater to 120 degrees
Fahrenheit to putting firearms under lock and key.]

4 Famous person: People like to know what celebrities say and do. Dropping the name of a
famous person at the beginning of a paper usually gets the reader's attention. It may be
something that person said or something he or she did that can be presented as an interest
grabber. You may just mention the famous person's name to get the reader's interest. The
famous person may be dead or alive. The famous person may be a good person like the Pope,
or he or she may be a bad person like John Wilkes Booth. Of course, bringing up this person's
name must be relevant to the topic. Even though the statement or action may not be readily
relevant, a clever writer can convince the reader that it is relevant.

from "Dear Taxpayer" by Will Manley in Booklist, May 1, 1993.

The most widely read writer in America today is not Stephen King, Michael Chrichton or
John Grisham. It's Margaret Milner Richardson, the Commissioner of the Internal Revenue
Service, whose name appears on the "1040 Forms and Instructions" booklet. I doubt that
Margaret wrote the entire 1040 pamphlet, but the annual introductory letter, "A Note from the
Commissioner," bears her signature.

[This is the first paragraph of an article about the lady named above. The author used the
names of three famous, modern American writers to get a reader's interest. Notice that the
first name on his list is a name that is probably more widely known than the other two.
Stephen King has been around for some time now, and everyone, from teenagers to
grandparents, know his name whether they have read his books or not.]

5 Declarative: This technique is quite commonly used, but it must be carefully used or the
writer defeats his whole purpose of using one of these patterns, to get the reader's interest. In
this pattern, the writer simply states straight out what the topic of his paper is going to be
about. It is the technique that most student writers use with only modest success most of the
time, but good professional writers use it too.

from "The Tuition Tap" by Tim Lindemuth in K-Stater, February, 1994.

In the College of Veterinary Medicine and Engineering, for example, nearly one-third of the
teaching faculty may retire by the year 2004. In the College of Education, more than a third of
the professors are 55 years old and older. The largest turnover for a single department is
projected to be in geology. More than half of its faculty this year are in the age group that will
retire at the millennium, says Ron Downey of K-State's Office of Institutional Research and
Analysis. The graying of K-State's faculty is not unique. A Regents' report shows
approximately 27 percent of the faculty at the six state universities will retire by the end of
this decade, creating a shortage of senior faculty.

[This is a straight forward introduction that gets right down to the topic of the aging of the
faculty of Kansas State University. There are no historical reviews, no surprising statements,
no anecdotes, no quotations from or about famous people. This is a discussion that leads to
further discussion about the topic. The biggest difficulty about this type of introduction is that
it can get boring. It is not likely to get the interest of anyone except those who are already
interested in this subject. Use this pattern with caution.]
These patterns can give a "lift" to your writing. Practice them. Try using two or three different
patterns for your introductory paragraph and see which introductory paragraph is best; it's
often a delicate matter of tone and of knowing who your audience is. Do not forget, though,
that your introductory paragraph should also include a thesis statement to let your reader
know what your topic is and what you are going to say about that topic.

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Planning Guide

Do the foundation work for writing your paper

Some simple steps will help you write a well-thought out, correctly written essay or paper.

Reserve:

 plenty of time for thought and writing development;

 a quiet place where you can concentrate;
 computer time (if sharing a computer).

Brainstorm

Explore the Subject

This activity is what writers spend the most time doing before they write. Before your pen
touches the paper, learn all that you can about your topic.

 Discuss the topic with others to learn other points of view.

 Read all that you can about the topic to learn the facts. Use your text books,
magazines, newspapers and encyclopedia.
 Research the topic on the Internet to find out if there is anything new that you
should know.
 Draw, take or gather pictures about your topic.
  Use your creativity and imagination.

The more time you spend thinking and brainstorming at the beginning of an assignment, the
less time you will waste while you are writing.

"General Writing Resource." OWL. The Purdue OWL. Purdue U Writing Lab, 2012. Web. 30
Dec 2013.<https://owl.english.purdue.edu/owl/section/1/>.

Organize

Focus, Plan and Outline

 Focus your topic so that you can effectively cover it. Is it is an essay-length topic or a
book-length topic?"
 Plan how you will order your support. Will you use 'time' or 'sequence', will you use
'order of importance', will you use 'spatial order'?
 Outline your ideas on paper. (Cooperate with another classmate: exchange outlines
and offer each other suggestions to improve order or clarity. It is easier to make
changes on your outline, than on a completed writing. )

Rough Draft

Get Your Ideas on Paper

 Get your ideas on paper. Make sure they are your own. Remember your instructor
doesn't expect you to be the originator of great ideas. You can synthesize (put
together) ideas, cite the authors of the ideas and give your personal interpretation,
which may become a great idea! Fair Use
 Use clear simple sentences at this stage. (You can add complex clause construction
later.) Also, don't worry too much about the grammar yet. Just get your supporting
points on paper.
 Follow your outline. Going 'off subject' often happens because the writer is following
a 'stream of consciousness' instead of an organized plan. (Use your text book for
ideas and suggestions for phrasing what you want to say.)

Edit 1

Revise and Check for Errors

Check for general errors.

 Remove examples that do not support the thesis (or topic sentence).
 Check sentence boundaries (run-ons and fragments).
 Check tense usage—simple vs. progressive (present, past).
 Check subject subject-verb agreement (3rd person singular marker).
 Check for tense agreement between main and embedded clauses (backshifting).
 Check for subject-verb agreement when clauses are present (nouns w/ modifiers).

Redraft

Rewrite – add and remove

Often when we look at a piece of writing the next day, we can find a lot of things that were
missed in the first draft.
  Make sure your thesis is developed clearly. Does your writing support the point of
the thesis? Does the conclusion relate (tie) the ideas together?
 Ask for a second opinion -- Ask your friend:
o Do you understand the point of the essay / paper? (Can you understand the
position taken on the topic?)
o Is the position clearly stated in the thesis sentence and logically developed
and supported with examples?
o Are you able to agree or disagree with the thesis? That is to say, does the
essay expand and support the opinion of the topic rather than state facts like
an encyclopedia?
o Do you have better or contrasting examples that should be included in the
essay or paper.
o Does the conclusion summarize and relate the essay content to the opinion
stated in the thesis.

 Add descriptive words by using adjectives and adverb modifiers.

 Get rid of wordiness by using connectors and reduced modifying clauses.
 Add transition words to link ideas and improve the flow of your writing—Then Next,
In addition, Finally, Additionly, However, Nevertheless, In contrast, Consequently,
and so on.

Edit 2

Again — Revise and Check for Errors

 Check for more specific errors. (Don't ignore anything that your instructor has
already pointed out or marked.)
 Check article, preposition and punctuation use.
 Use a dictionary to check the precise meaning and spelling of words if you are unsure
about them.
 Ask a friend to read, check, and find any logic gaps in your writing. (Ask if any part of
the writing is unclear or hard to follow.)

Final

Write or Type

 Write or type your final draft.

 Be sure not to copy any errors that you have already identified.

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