Joseph Riggio International

Getting Unstuck!

SPECIAL REPORT

“The Four Ways

People Get Stuck …
And Getting Unstuck”
 Getting Unstuck!
Welcome to my special report about the four ways that people get stuck … and how to get unstuck.

The first thing you need to know is that there really are only four ways people get stuck, and that you will be able to identify them and know
what to do about them after you’ve fully and carefully read through this special report.

I can say this with confidence after more than twenty five years of working with thousands of clients around the world. My work with these
clients spans working with them on issues of personal development, professional development, business consulting, relationship coaching and
much, much more. Despite the specific presenting issue or challenge they are facing, what my clients want is for something to be different than
the way it is for them today.

Whether there’s something that they want that they don’t yet have, or something they want to be going in a particular way that isn’t going that
way right now for them, or something they have that they no longer want to be the way it is today, or something they are already working
towards and want to insure it turns out the way they imagine and desire it will be … almost always they feel stuck in some way.



These folks have either been unable to get their results and outcomes on their own, or unsure that they’ll be able to get them or do it on their
own. The want some help that will insure they get what they want. Regardless of the specific “presenting problem,” after working with these
thousands of clients I have found that people actually only get stuck in only four ways … and this report will reveal each of these ways and the
ways to get past them and what it is that likely keeps you stuck today.

So let’s get started …

Joseph Riggio, Ph.D. 


- Architect & Designer of the MythoSelf® Process and SomaSemantics®

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PRESENTING PROBLEMS


I have laid out the four ways that people get stuck in the four bullet
points to the right. That’s it … it’s always in one of these four ways
that people get stuck, and they occur as a series of steps. You can get
stuck at any one of the steps, or two or more of them at the same time.
After working with clients from around the world, over a wide range
of issues and desired outcomes, this pattern became obvious to me.
There are only two kinds of what I call “Presenting Problems” — Four Ways Of Getting STUCK …
❖ A problem about something that is happening that the person
presenting it doesn’t want to be happening, e.g.: fears or failures
1. I DON’T WANT TO DO IT

they are experiencing, such as a looming breakup in a relationship,
or a business or career set back
❖ A problem about something that the person presenting it wants to 2. I DON’T KNOW WHAT I REALLY WANT

happen that either isn’t happening the way they want it to be
happening or isn’t happening at all, e.g.: fear of failing at
something, such as beginning a new relationship or starting a new 3. I DON’T KNOW HOW TO DO IT

business or career
It is critical to note that if someone believes that they can remedy what 4. I DON’T KNOW WHY I DON’T ACT
they are facing by doing what they are doing, or doing nothing at all,
they will not perceive the issue as a problem. It is only when there is
a desire or need for things to be different and doing what you’ve
been doing no longer works that you have a problem that needs to
be solved.

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 Getting Unstuck!
“GO TO WHERE THE PROBLEM IS NOT …” - R. Fraser
First of all it’s important to know that there are two conditions that
must be present for you to perceive what is happening at the moment
as a problem:
❖ What is happening isn’t what you want to be happening, or isn’t
happening in the way you want it to be happening
❖ If you do nothing or continue doing what you’ve been doing the
issue you are facing will not change or go away of it’s own accord
The material in this special report is based on the MythoSelf Process
Four Ways Of Getting UNSTUCK …
model and the work I’ve been doing for the past twenty five years. I
designed the MythoSelf Process for doing transformational work ❖ LIGHT A FIRE WITHIN

with clients based on Roye Fraser’s model, The Generative Imprint,
and organized around always working from a positive bias.
A unique aspect of the work I learned from Roye is to begin by, “going
❖ DESIGN A STRATEGY

to where the problem is not” — therefore I always start by finding
out “What’s Working” to establish a positive bias and begin from
there, this is an extremely powerful way of insuring that you’ll be
❖ MAKE A PLAN OF ACTION

getting your results and outcomes, on your own and with others.
As we continue exploring this together we’ll be looking at each of the ❖ UNLEASH YOUR BEST SELF
four ways that people get stuck, define what happens at each step, as
well as what to do and how to do it to get unstuck from each one. By
the end of this special report you’ll have some tools you can use
regardless of the specific “Presenting Problem” you might be facing
or the unique way you may feel stuck in the moment.

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 Getting Unstuck!
THE DESIRED OUTCOME:



Most of the time when people find themselves stuck it’s about
something they want (or something they don’t want) in
particular … let’s agree to call this the “Desired Outcome.”
The Desired Outcome is what they imagine and how they
project things turning out if everything goes their way. The
challenge they face is that often despite their best efforts to get
things to turn out that way they don’t.
To inelegantly paraphrase Albert Einstein:
“Doing the same stuff the same way again and again isn’t
only insane, it will never work.”
The moral of this story is that you have to do something
differently … and here’s where the story gets tricky.
Many of my clients feel like they done just that, i.e.: they’ve
tried every way they know how to get their outcome … and
yet they still find themselves stuck and spinning their wheels.
So its not enough to just try something different you need to
know specifically what needs to be different, how to do it and
have the capacity and capability of doing it differently too.

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STEP ONE:
Moving from the desired outcome to successfully achieving
your outcome begins with picking an outcome you are really
committed to achieving.
This may sound self evident, but a surprising number of times
I’ve found that this is where a client I’m working with is stuck
in the process — they’ve picked an outcome they don’t really
want, or aren't committed enough to getting to do what it
takes to get it.
So we have to start over right at the beginning, i.e.: reviewing
the outcome they say they want to see if it really fits with the
way they imagine their future turning out … if and when it
turns out well for them.



NOTE: Many people find at this point that they outcome
they’ve chosen has really been chosen for them by someone
else, and it’s not their outcome at all.
So we begin by resetting the stage so to speak, by first
establishing a sense of how you want to be in the world ❖ Hidden Switch A: Accessing the PS+ (Positive State Experience)
whether or not you ever get the outcome you thought you
Think of a time when you were already at your best doing something
wanted. Only then can we begin picking an outcome that
simple or simply doing nothing at all, e.g.: brushing your teeth or lying
makes sense for you to pursue. Step one accomplished! on the beach. Then notice how you feel in your body and what you are
doing in your mind … this is the position you want to begin from again.

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STEP TWO:
Once you have an outcome worth going for you still need to know
what to do to make it happen.
For example let’s say you want to improve a relationship you’re in,
you’d have to know what to do to make it better than it is now. This
is not the same as knowing how to do it, it’s simply knowing what
it is that you could be doing that would improve the relationship.
In the case of this example you would need to know what the
elements are that compromise the relationship … in other words,
what makes up the relationship as it is now. Then you would need
to be able to identify how the relationship would be if it were they
way you imagine it being.
❖ Hidden Switch B: Shift The Filters and Force The Sorts
This is called establishing the “Delta” — the difference between
Usually what prevents folks from establishing what they need to be
where or how things are today, and how or where you want them
doing is their perspective, or how they perceive things to be now.
to be in an ideal state.
There are two critical aspects of perspective:
When you have Delta defined you can move to the next part of this
process of defining the difference that will make a difference. ❖ what are you capable of noticing based on the perceptual filters
Another way of thinking about this is in terms of leverage — you have in place, i.e.: how and what you put your attention on

“What will move the situation from the way it is to the way you ❖ how do you make sense of what you notice based on the sorting
want it to be after you’ve taken the action you will take?” patterns you use, i.e.: the beliefs and values you currently hold

It’s also useful to think in terms of effectiveness and efficiency —
“What is the least you can do that will recreate the situation to be
the way you want it to be in terms of your desired outcome?”
When you are able to perceive a situation with clarity a strategy for
achieving your desired outcome often becomes clear without much
more effort on your part, even when it’s clear that the best strategy
may be to take no action at all.

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STEP THREE:
We can assume if this is where you find yourself stuck you have
decided upon an outcome worth going for and you know what you
need to do to get it — but, you don’t know the specific steps to take,
in what order or how to do them.
This is where a lot of people think they are stuck, even when they
don’t yet have the first two steps worked out. No matter how
competent you are in terms of being able to take the steps required to
get your desired results and outcomes, if you don’t first put your
house in order, i.e.: establishing a willingness to do what it takes
and knowing with some precision beforehand what to be doing,
you will always be fighting a losing battle.
I see this a lot when my clients are truly very busy doing stuff, but
still not getting the results and outcomes they want to be achieving ❖ Hidden Switch C: The IMED Model
… either on their own or with others. Knowing “how to do it” is
more than knowing how to create results and outcomes. More IMED stands for “Internal Motivation - External Direction” meaning
important than just knowing “how to do it” is knowing what the that you are directed to take action based on your internal sense of what
consequences of your actions are and will be as your are taking them you want and using the information in the environment to determine
what to do to get your desired results and outcomes.
… are you actually getting closer to, or further from, what you
want and intended? This about having a a way to measure and Many people are inversely organized, “External Motivation - Internal
determine that you are and will keep you going in the right Direction” (EMID), i.e.: externally motivated and internally directed.
direction. They are driven to change who they are, and how they are, based on
pressures they feel the world is placing upon them, i.e.: what they think
NOTE: While a plan of action is useful and desirable, you only need they are supposed to be doing as imposed upon them by others, their
to know the first and most important step to take, how to take just work, their families, their friends, their culture or society-at-large. In my
that step, and a way to use what you learn from taking it to begin. work I refer to this in terms of being taught to “Be Good and Fit In.”

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STEP THREE — continued:
There are two critical aspects to Step Three … “Make A Plan Of
Action”
❖ Knowing how to do “IT” yourself
- or -
❖ Being able to identify and engage others who know how to do
“IT”
When you have a strategy in place based on closing the Delta between
where you are and where you want to be you will have some idea of
what to be doing. Using the example of improving a relationship you
are in this might know that you want the other person to feel more
comfortable when they are with you and have greater trust in you.
You may know something about what to do specifically to make the
other person more comfortable with you and to trust you more, and
even the specific steps to take to make that happen. You may know
how to take those steps and be ready to begin. In this case you know
how to do “IT” … the “IT” being the steps to take to make another
person more comfortable with you. In this case you personally possess
the resource you need to proceed.
However you may be in a position where you don’t know what “IT” CRITICAL ALERT !!! — You only need to know step #1 to begin …
is, i.e.: what you need to do to make the other person more
A critical distinction of remaining in and using the IMED Model is
comfortable and trusting in the relationship and you, despite knowing
realizing that you do not need t know, and likely cannot know, all the
that’s what you need to do. In this case you are missing the personal
steps you need to take to achieve your desired results and outcomes at
resources you want and you must identify a source for getting them. the start … regardless of how well you’ve designed your plan of action.

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STEP FOUR:
The transition from Step Three to Step Four, requires a quantum leap.
Each of the first three steps are obvious once you know what to look for
and how to identify them. This step is invisible other than by what is
lacking in your ability to achieve your desired results and outcomes,
despite having resolved the challenges presented by steps one through
three.
All you can know about Step Four - “I Don’t Know Why I Don’t Act” is
that you find yourself unable to produce your results and outcomes
regardless of putting forth your best effort to do so.

Doing Your Best Will Never Substitute 


For Being At Your Best!
Until you embody this idea you will remain stuck. Yet, there is a way of
perceiving and operating where you are able to access and allow
information from a position in the future, where you have already
attained the outcome, to inform you about how to achieve your desired
results and outcomes.
Another way of considering this is to ask yourself, “Who do I have to be,
and what will I have to have done, to achieve the results and outcomes I
desire today?” Then, knowing that you must find a way to be that person
without compromising yourself. This process of achieving a way of being
without compromise requires a significant commitment to self reflection
and becoming self aware … as well as becoming situationally aware in
ways you probably haven’t been before.
❖ Hidden Switch C: The Trajectory Of Intent
The Trajectory Of Intent shifts the focus from goal setting and planning based
upon historical data to preferencing emergent data, as it appears in real time.
We always operate in a continuum that includes information from the past,
information that is emerging. and information that will only be available as
we move nearer to achieving our desired results and outcomes (… or further
away from them) in the future, and using this information to set our course.
Considering a trajectory that extends from a point in our past, through the
point we are in in the present moment, to a point in the future beyond the
point where we will have achieved our desired results and outcomes, we will
have set up a perceptual framework to notice for where we are relative to the
action we take at each step and to adjust our course appropriately - this is the
fundamental metric, or measurement framework, we need to succeed.

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GETTING THE OUTCOME:
Okay so you’ve identified where you are at each step and
you’ve taken the action necessary to move beyond the sticking
points. You have identified an outcome worth going for,
designed a strategy laying out what to do to achieve the results
you intend, figured out how to take at least the first step or two
in the right direction, and organized yourself internally so that
your strengths are aligned with your desired results and
outcomes.
These are big things to get right and well organized in relation
to the intention you hold to create your desired results and ❖ For Every Action There’s A Reaction
outcomes. However, when you have done this you’re likely to
One of the most powerful things I make sure my clients remain aware of
see significant progress being to happen almost immediately. are the effects of consequences of the actions they plan to take BEFORE
As you stick with it, making sure you go back and check your they actually take any action whenever and wherever possible.
actual results as you continue taking steps forward, you’ll be
I work on the essential premise that while there are always negative and
building in a new pattern of performance that will become your
positive consequences to any action you might take, you can make a choice
standard way of operating successfully. to focus on maximizing positive consequences, while minimizing negative
There is one additional thing you need to remain aware of as consequences.
well … i.e.: there are always negative and positive For example, if you think of wasted time and energy as a negative
consequences to any action you take, even when the negative consequence of taking action you can maximize the efficiency of how you
consequence is simply that you have given up the time and go about creating your desired results and outcomes. If you see learning as
energy you’ve used to create your outcomes instead of doing a positive consequence you can focus on the lessons inherent in any action
you take by taking some time after the fact, reflecting on the action you’ve
something else with them … or you haven’t gotten the outcome
taken, analyzing the results and outcomes you’ve produced and mentally
you intended, but you’ve learned something along the way.
redesign and rehearse the strategy you used, to refine it and make it better.

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Well there you have it …
The Four Ways That People Get Stuck … And Getting Unstuck
What makes this model so effective is it’s simplicity, but hidden in the
simplicity is a complexity as well. Each step becomes obvious when
you know what to notice for, and then it doesn’t take much to know
what to do to get past each way of getting stuck at each step.
The complexity in the model is two-fold:
❖ First of All — becoming fast at recognizing when, where, why and
how you get stuck, and noticing it so quickly that you begin doing
what you have to do to get unstuck almost before you become stuck
❖ Secondly — if/when you do get caught up in a step on the path,
becoming resilient and resourceful enough about the ways you have
available to you to get past being stuck in that particular way
As you continue to apply the “Getting Unstuck” model on your own
you’ll notice that you will have become skillful at noticing when
others are stuck too, as well as how specifically they are stuck, and if
it’s appropriate maybe even having a few words of advice for them
about how they might take steps of their own to get unstuck … in that
moment you will have moved beyond being the victim in the scenario
to having become the expert.
Good luck on your journey … Buona Fortuna and Abundanza!

Joseph

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WHAT’S NEXT?

Join me in my “GETTING UNSTUCK” Webinar

If you want to learn more about this model and how you can begin to implement it for yourself I invite you to join me for a
totally free webinar where I go over each of the four ways that people get stuck in more detail, as well as what to do about
them with examples and more specific information about what to do and how to do it. I’ve also set up a special private
Facebook group where you can join me and others in exploring the model in more detail if you’d like, including asking
questions about it that you might have and getting some answers to help you out. There’s no cost or obligation to
participate in the webinar or join the Facebook group — they are my way of spreading the word and helping you and
others to create a future that works.

So as I said at the beginning … let’s get started … again …

Joseph Riggio, Ph.D. 


- Architect & Designer of the MythoSelf® Process and SomaSemantics®

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Joseph Riggio International

31 N. Sugan Rd. - Suite 3G

New Hope, PA 18938
(215) 853-6768

Disclaimer: This special report and the infographic it is based upon is for purely
educational purposes only. You may use it as the basis of you own self study and
learning. As a consultant and coach I help clients to find their own solutions and
provide them with new information that may be helpful to them for educational
and learning purposes. As simply as I’ve laid out the four ways that people get
stuck it still most often takes some additional learning, skill and experience to
implement. In fact I never recommend people try to use this information, or any
other, if they are not fully qualified to put it into practice.

Creative Commons License Please Note: You should seek qualified professional input before implementing
How People Get Stuck ... And Getting Unstuck 
 any of the information contained in this special report and infographic, as it is
by Joseph Riggio, Ph.D. is licensed under a Creative not, nor is it intended, as professional advice of any kind, medical, psychological,
Commons Attribution-NonCommercial- legal, financial or otherwise Use of any or all of the information in this special
NoDerivatives 4.0 International License. report or infographic is done solely at your own risk and not advised.