Steer Clear of Toxic People

Some people will squeeze the life out of you if you let
them. They’re the ones who are quick to criticize us
and
make callous remarks behind our backs. They thrive
on
pointing out our inadequacies and love to remind us of
our flaws. They like to prey on us when we’re most
vulnerable
and kick us when we’re down. In addition, they
relish the moments when we are vulnerable and take
every
opportunity to chip away at our self-esteem. Deep
down,
they are insecure, unhappy folks who have discovered
they feel better about themselves when others feel
worse.
Warning: steer clear of these toxic people—they are
poster
children for regret and reek of negativity.
Instead, surround yourself with positive, supportive
people who will encourage you and believe in you.
These
are individuals who tend to smile a lot, love to laugh at
life, and are always there to cheer you on. They see
your
potential even when you’re not showing it, and they
look
at every day as an opportunity for you to do
something
great. They are also the ones who boost your confi
dence
when you’re up against a challenge and who lift your
spirits
when you’re down in the dumps or stuck in a rut. They
are eternal optimists and die-hard advocates. They’ve
got
your back and will always be in your corner.
Wendy, the senior vice president of human resources
at a large company I worked at early in my career, was
not one of these positive and supportive people. She
was a virtual tyrant who was referred to as Toxic
Wendy
throughout employee circles and was notorious for her
sharp tongue, cruel wit, and abusive style. She took
pride
in publicly humiliating people and then discrediting
them
behind their backs the minute they left the room. Her
job
title gave her power and she abused it at every
opportunity.
It was not uncommon for her staff to walk out of
her offi ce crying after she had fl own into a sudden
tirade
while scrutinizing their work. She literally went through
a new secretary every other month—two of them had
to
take stress leave due to the harsh reprimands and
cutting
remarks Wendy doled out to them on a daily basis.
In my exit interview from the company, I met with
the CEO, who asked me why I was leaving. My
response
was straight to the point: “I’d regret it if I stayed one
more
day. I think you’ll see a lot more people leaving as well
if
you keep the head of Human Resources around. No
one
deserves that kind of abuse. The crazy thing is that
she’s
the one in charge of people!” A few months later I got
a
call from one of my former coworkers, who told me
that
Toxic Wendy had gotten the boot in the midst of a
nasty
ethics scandal. While perhaps justice had been served,
the
damage she had done could not be erased.
Hanging around toxic people is a recipe for regret. Get
them out of your life and stay as far away from them
as
possible. Instead, surround yourself with positive
people.
Just being around them will make you feel more
energized,
motivated, confi dent, inspired, happy, and alive.
Steer clear of toxic people and put yourself in the
presence
of the people who bring out the best in you.