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Jingran Mu

Professor Marie Webb

Ling 12

April 15, 2019

My Story

My father once told me, if you have an expectation for yourself, then actions

toward that goal must be done for you to accomplish anything at all.

– Jingran Mu

“The earlier one comes to a realization of the necessity of self-control, the more successful

that person will be in the future,” my father would always tell me ever since I can remember.

Well before I was in elementary school, he always seemed busy and he barely came back home

to eat dinner with his family. I did not really have the idea that he was my father until his first

time beating me up with a wooden shoehorn when I was in third grade. “I’m sorry, I won’t

overplay games and not practice piano again!” I cried as my mom carefully took off my pants

and checked my wound. “Listen son, all successful people earned their success through hard

work, and practicing piano and studying is what you must do to be a well-educated kid,” my

mom said while she gently placed a hot egg over my butt to ease my pain.

As a Chinese who grew up in a typical Asian family, my parents, especially my mom

because my dad was always busy when I was little, have been telling me the importance of

studying and self-control ever since I got into elementary. Like all parents, they kept on telling

me that I am smart and should always be able to ace the tests, and so I believed them. However,

I was never really able to realize that I was acing the tests because I studied hard, not because
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I was smarter than everyone else. Different from most elementary schools in the United States,

where kids are mainly playing around and having the time of their lives, Chinese elementary

education really puts pressure on kids and force them to study. Part of the reason why there is

a stereo type thinking Asians are good at math, is because while many of the U.S. elementary

schools are teaching addition and subtraction, the Chinese elementary has already moved on to

fractions. And so I studied hard and moved on to third grade, still thinking I was smart and

that’s why I aced all the tests.

“I’m full.” I said while putting down my chopsticks, “I’ll head downstairs to play with all

my friends in the garden, my friend from the sixth floor told me they will be down there at six

thirty.”

“But don’t you have a midterm on math tomorrow? You should study for it.” My mom said

in a worried tone.

“It’s fine, I have never failed you on getting high scores, haven’t I? Besides, it’s math, it’s

gonna be super easy.”

“Alright then, but come back before ten, or else your father is gonna be home and he won’t

be happy if you’re still playing outside.”

And time passed by as I played hide and seek with all my friends in the huge garden that

is shared by numerous tall apartment buildings. Before I knew it, it was already eleven in the

night. Crap. I ran to the elevator, pressed on twenty first floor again and again, thinking it would

make the elevator go up faster.

“Where have you been,” my father said in a calm, low, and scary tone as always.

“Sorry father, I didn’t know it was already passed ten.”

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“Of course you didn’t know, what did I tell you about self-control? You really think you

will be able to be successful later in life if you keep on acting like this? Do you know you have

a midterm tomorrow?” My father raised his voice and frowned, staring at me and slowly

standing up from the couch – he is very upset. “Now, go to bed and we will have a talk

tomorrow.”

My mom woke me up in the morning, like always. She dried my hair with a blow dryer

after I took a shower, like always. She prepared an egg and milk with some bread and steam

buns, like always. She took my backpack and gave it to me, like always. She waved and said

bye and good luck to me at the door, like always. I met up with my friend and walked to school,

like always. “You ready for the test?” Guo, one of my best friends asked me while we were

walking. “It’s math, it’s gonna be suuuuper easy, I didn’t even study for it,” I said.

“Take one test and pass it down, the test will start when the bell rings, if you are done you

can walk up here and hand it to me. You will have one class period to finish the test,” my

favorite math teacher said while she is handing out the test.

“Alright, let’s get at least a 95 on this one,” I thought to myself while writing my name on

the top of the test.

First time in my life, I cried after I saw my score. Unlike many teachers, my math teacher

grades all the tests on the spot, and she handed me back my test with, first time ever, a

disappointed look on her face. First time in my life, I failed a math test. I was lost, I didn’t

know what to do, I cried, and so I ran to the in-campus phone call booth.

“MOM!” I cried, “I’m sorry!”

“What happened son, why are you crying, what’s going on, are you ok?” She sounded very
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worried.

“I, I…” I didn’t know how to tell her that I failed a test.

“It’s alright son, you can calm down and tell me slowly what happened, do you want me

to go to the school?”

“No, it’s just, I, I’m sorry, I failed the test…” I was still crying.

I can’t really recall my entire conversation with my mom during that phone call, I was

crying and stumping on the floor, thinking how could I be such a loser in life, how could I ever

fail a test, and most importantly, HOW DO I FACE MY FATHER?

It is not until third grade, that I learned I was not smart enough to take a test without

studying, I was not capable of self-controlling, and I never actually knew what my father has

been telling me. It is not until when I failed, that I learned my lesson to listen to my parents, to

truly learn from my father’s words. It is not until I lost my pride, that I know I must work hard

to be good and successful.

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April 22, 2019

University of California, Santa Barbara

HSSB 1233
Santa Barbara, CA 93106

Dear Jingran Mu:

How has your life been since that lesson you learned from third grade? Have you finally known
the meaning behind your father’s words? You are now an university student, and as you are
exploring through your academic career, adapting to new environments and gathering more
knowledge, the level of your expectation for yourself and your ability to acquire success should
have increased exponentially. You have been doubted, you have been through failures, and you
have been disappointed by yourself. Yet, it is still too soon to give up; you must go higher and
achieve your goals. To reach an ultimate success in life, you must go step by step. To secure
your future academic career, you must improve your GPA, and in order to be prepared for
future, you must go through internships, and in order to become a better person in general, you
must learn how to better self-control.

A current specific goal that is obvious and vital for your future academic career, is to secure a
high GPA through an intensive study schedule and a well-planned rest schedule. At an age of
20, which is the age where people possess an endless amount of energy, you need to learn to
burn that energy on the right thing. You must convince yourself that even though you are
exhausted, you are working on something that is well worth your time and energy just like how
Jahren does it during her young age (Jahren 36). First step toward a successful study schedule
is to form yourself a good habit, a habit of studying. Your constant procrastination and a
resistant feeling toward studying are negatively affecting your GPA, thus a habit of studying
with a stable schedule will be necessary. Since currently you have a rather relaxed Tuesday and
Thursday, setting a period of time in both of those days to focus on studying only, will be your
first step toward a constant habit of studying. During Tuesdays and Thursdays, you almost
always waste most of your time on watching videos and procrastinating and refusing to work,
and you must change that. Before you have realized, you only study and work on your
homework when it is necessary, which means this habit of procrastination to work on the last
minute has been negatively influencing you. Forcing yourself to study on a certain time period
will be tough to do at first, but slowly a habit of planning my study and work beforehand will
become a norm. Once studying becomes normal and a necessity to me, I can slowly adjust my
plan on studying to fit my daily timetable, so I can spend a decent amount of time on working
every single day instead of forcing myself to work on certain time periods. In addition to be
able to sit myself down and study, an efficient way of studying is also vital to secure a high
GPA in all classes. Efficiency is when time spent on something will result in a maximum benefit,
so a focus on my weaknesses can be part of my plan. As an international student, you learned
English as your additional language, but you learned your math and hard sciences in equations
and numbers that will not change due to the language, so linguistics and literature is what you
must focus on. Instead of spending hours on learning pure math and science, you must spend
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about four to eight hours on acing linguistic classes and reading literatures.

Although studying and having a successful academic career is vital to acquire a promising
future, internships are also critical. Having a high GPA does not completely offer you a ticket
toward your goal of gaining higher education in graduate schools, internships that help you
adapt to a working environment are important experiences. Solely knowing that internships are
important is far not enough; actions must be taken. Your knowledge of current school activities
is enough for you to seek for internships, and you must act upon your goal. Before you seek
for internships, you should apply to student clubs such as Chinese Student & Scholar
Association (CSSA) to strengthen your credibility and resume. After gaining experiences from
the student clubs such as CSSA, getting on the website, named University of California, Santa
Barbara Career Services, provided by your current university is your very first step. You should
seek for one or multiple internships that can be helpful in your future. Observing from your
current situation, and base on your interest in economics and business, internships that you
acquire for shall be related to economics and business. You have already experienced in an
environment where people are researching for small capital firms and make economic reports
based on their results, thus other experiences are necessary. There are multiple options where
you can apply for internships in large capital companies such as Google or Apple, and you
should consider applying for one. To reach success, you must observe from successful people
and firms where they have a successful system to keep the company running. In addition, your
enormous interest in technology and internet should help you to keep your passion while
working in a pressuring environment.

A major issue with your current studying schedule and attitude is your awareness of the
necessity to work and study, which also means you lack self-control, and a will power to
restrain yourself from distractions and time-consuming activities. To keep yourself aware of
what you must be doing is always tough, and it should not only be a short-term goal where you
try to restrain yourself, but also a lifelong goal to know what you are working for. One helpful
action that you can do is to always write out your plan before you start working. Having the
plan written and sticking it on the wall to remind yourself what you must be doing will be
extremely convenient for you. Once you offer yourself a reason to work, a dream to achieve,
you will have a will power to stick to your schedule and avoid distractions. Currently, and
critically observed as well, you spend an excessive amount of time online, which prevents you
from being productive. While watching videos and playing games can be very entertaining and
stress releasing, they can also be incredibly time consuming. Self-control is not restraining
yourself from every entertainment and stress relieving activities, but to restrain yourself from
over relaxing. A good schedule should not only include a good amount of time on studying and
working, but also a sufficient amount of relaxation time. One solution to your desire of
relaxation is to have a half hour breaks between work periods that you have set for yourself.
This ultimate goal of consistently being able to self-control may not be able to be done within
this short quarter of university, but a continuous effort toward this goal shall be given.

In conclusion, while success cannot be reached within the time period you are given with, but
steps toward that final goal should be done. First you must keep up the GPA and possibly raising
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it higher, simply because it makes your application “prettier” when applying for graduate
school and work. Then you must seek for internships that can be supportive later in your life
because you are experienced. Finally, you should give a continuous effort on trying to restrain
yourself from distractions and force yourself to study for a sufficient amount of time.

Sincerely,

David Mu
University of California, Santa Barbara
HSSB 1233
Santa Barbara, CA 93106.
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Works Cited

Jahren, Hope. Lab Girl. Vintage Books, 2017.