SPAIN

Courtship and Dating

Courtship in Spain is a long, drawn-out process. If the woman shows interest too
soon, she may scare the man away. A game of refusal and pursuit typically takes
place among both parties before a date even occurs. First dates often include drinks,
coffee and long conversation, ending around sunup if the date goes well. Spaniards
find individualism attractive. A unique, yet fashionable, sense of style will go a long
way toward impressing a prospective Spanish mate.

10 TIPS HOW DATING WORKS

1. Spaniards don’t date. The verb to date doesn’t even have an exact
equivalent in Spanish. The closest equivalent would be the verb salir con
alguien (to go out with someone).
2. Spaniards are scared of the word novio-a. Don’t take it personally if
he/she doesn’t call you novio-aimmediately because it goes in and out of
fashion. While boyfriend/girlfriend are widespread in the U S, in Spain there
have been times when novio/novia was seen as implying too strong a
commitment.
3. Your Spaniard novio-a will live with his/her parents. This is not only the
Spanish way, but also the current-economic-crisis way.
4. Don’t expect to meet the parents immediately. Meeting the parents
means: Vamos en serio (we are serious about our relationship).
5. Once you meet the parents, be prepared to meet los abuelos (the
grandparents), los tíos (uncles and aunts) and los primos (cousins), since all of
them live nearby.
6. Don’t expect a ring. We don’t do anillos de compromiso (engagement
rings) at all.
7. Spaniards don’t use the word prometido-a (fiancé) either. You will only
hear it in dubbed foreign films.
8. Many Spaniards no se casan (don’t marry) at all, but most who do still
celebrate una boda católica(a Catholic wedding).
9. Tu boda (your wedding) will be very well planned: The date will be
decided at least 12 months in advance at a minimum!
10. If your novio-a asks you: ¿Quieres casarte conmigo?, that means: Do
you want to marry me? If the answer is yes, just reply: Sí, quiero.

Much like the French, people in Spain don't really date. According to
Living Language, there isn't even a word for the act of dating— the
closest equivalent is the verb salir con alguien, which means "to go out
with someone."

Most Spaniards live with their parents until marriage, but don't expect to
meet their family right away — this is something that they wait to do
until things are serious. But, when you do meet their family, you can
expect to meet the whole family.