Professional Documents
Culture Documents
Burn Paper Without Harming Trees
Burn Paper Without Harming Trees
paper
without
harming
trees
Written by: zuhair
What to expect from this book
‘Burn Paper Without Harming Trees’, meant
to be titled ‘ A Humorous Approach To
Writing A Book’, is a book that is meant to
give you tips on writing your own book as
well as walk you through the necessary
steps so that you end up with a good book.
Additionally, personal experiences and,
obviously, humor will feature frequently
throughout the book. By the end of reading
this book, you should know how to write a
book, but whether you actually put those
words on paper is one of life’s mysteries.
Even if you don’t plan on writing a book,
you can still read it for the fun of it, that is
if you find it fun. Good luck, have fun and
thanks for choosing this book!
Acknowledgements
I think it is important that I
acknowledge and thank all those
people who helped me in the writing
of this book, so first I would like to
thank my……..self and no one else.
In actuality, without God’s blessings
and his help, I could have never
written this. I would also like to thank
my family for supporting me as I
wrote this book, my teachers to
make me capable of writing a book
and my friends for doing nothing in
particular!
TABLE OF CONTENT
Introduction………………………………........ If
Is it time? ……………………………………….. You
Is it a good idea? …………………….......... Were
What can I do?................................ Expecting
Generating ideas………………………………. Page
Gathering the necessary resources… numbers,
Researching…………………………………….. I
Planning and plotting……………………….. Am
Expanding the universe ……………………really
Naming the book……………………………… sorry
‘Bang’ goes the gun………………………….. To
Introducing the characters …………… Announce
Flashbacks………………………………………. That
Determination ………………………………… I
Waving the white flag………………………. Am
Killing off characters ……………………….. Too
Ending it all……………………………………… lazy
Perfection ………………………………………. To
Publishing your work………………………… Add
Baiting the audience …………………………them
Receiving feedback…………………………… here,
Dealing with jealous critics………………… Do
Implementation……………………………….. It
Again?.............................................. Yourself!
Introduction
It sucks, but it’s true. This wasn’t supposed to be
what it is. About a year ago, I planned on writing a
science fiction book, which at that time didn’t seem
like a very difficult task, but oh boy, now after at
least five unsuccessful attempts, I’ve just cast the
idea aside. What you’re reading now is a book that
will go step by step to make your book writing
experience and the book itself a masterpiece. Even if
you’re here by mistake or because you had nothing
else to do, you might end up being motivated
enough to type your words on paper for others to
read. Now, I do realize that I myself am new to this
game, but I had and still have the burning desire to
write. You must note that I’ve written over a
hundred books in my time and I am definitely a
professional writer. I am sorry, that’s a typo, I
meant I’ve read a hundred books. I know it’s ironic
how I haven’t written a proper novel yet, but I will
be telling you how to do so. Don’t be afraid, you’ve
come to the right place! Whoever you are, whether
big or small, you have the potential to write, so ‘just
do it!’
It is important to note that because writing on
writing is not a particularly interesting job, I will add
a hint of humor and my own cringy personal
experiences to make it readable for you and writable
for me. Also, if you are unable to detect the humor
or find it rude at times, please forgive me if you can,
if you can’t, it’s fine. So, when reading this book,
keep in mind, I will be making some jokes at your
expense, and if you’re sensitive, try being more
insensitive. If you read a little of this book and don’t
find it all that interesting or worth your worthless,
precious time, feel free to exit this book by putting it
back where they traditionally have belonged, in the
old, dusty bookshelf!
The main purpose of this book is to motivate me
and other writers to write, but that’s not all. For me,
this book is where I am talking to you as a friend
about writing. If you think you’re not worth my
great friendship and you think you might not be able
to retain the bond, then I think you have no purpose
in life. In this postmodern world where no one gives
a damn about anyone else, we, the writer and the
reader are talking and making a connection, sort of.
The fact that there are no limits to what I write
about and how I choose to roast you allows the
words to flow. Additionally, as this is my first book, I
can gather a lot of valuable experience which would
help me in the writing of my next book, if I ever
write one. In a nutshell, this book is mostly to help
me, while as a bonus, you get something too. That’s
because in the dimension I am from, that’s my
world, you’re insignificant there. Oh yes, now you
know my deepest darkest secret of how I’m a
nonhuman entity feeding off the emotions of those
reading the book, which makes me powerful, and
eventually, due to emotional overload, I will become
extremely powerful and rule the world! This is
actually the major theme of my science fiction book
I was writing. I might write it in the future, so be on
the look out.
Is it time?
One thing you need to brand on the back of your
head is the fact that it’s never too late or too soon
to write your first book. Obviously, if a ten year old
writes a short story, you can’t possibly expect it to
be as good as the work of Dan Brown because at
that age children have certain mental capabilities.
That reminds me that the ten year Olds of today do
have the potential to do great things, but instead
their minds are filled with memes, Fortnite and other
things I can’t quite mention here. Before you start
calling me a parent, I also love games and memes,
but that doesn’t mean that I don’t have enough time
for other things. The mental capabilities of a
thirteen, twenty one and forty year old are all
different, at least they should be. Experience is also
another factor that along with your biological age
can determine the quality of work you can produce.
Obviously, I am ignoring any super genius child who
has been writing since the age of minus three and
also that person who is the exact opposite. Now, I’ll
remind you that I am by no means discriminating
between people on the basis of their age, and if you
do feel like that is the case, consider getting an eye
check up.
If you keep on delaying it, saying ‘I’ll do it
tomorrow’, let me tell you, tomorrow never comes.
However, don’t get me wrong, this doesn’t mean
that you have exams approaching and you start
writing your romantic novella! I faced a similar
situation when writing my book, which I decided I
would start after my exams. In the meantime, I
planned and plotted out my book so I could get to
work without having to waste, rather, invest,
anytime on planning. Unfortunately, it’s sad how I
never got to even do a quarter, let alone the
complete book. On the bright side, I am still writing
a book, just a different one.
On the topic of time, let’s say school is over and
you’re free, don’t go on thinking it’s a good idea to
sit there in your writing spot and type away and do
nothing else or writing so little that by the end of
the summers you’re only done with two pages. I
highly doubt anyone will be on the former extreme,
rather, you would probably be leaning towards the
latter one. I am not saying it’s a disgrace to the
family to write only a couple of pages, all I am just
saying that if you want a full book, you need to
write it yourself. I think it would be helpful to add
this extremely famous quote which I just made up
while writing this paragraph, ‘A pen on its own can
do nothing, but with a hand, they still can do
nothing!’
Dedicating a certain portion of the day to writing can
be a healthy practice and the overall writing
wouldn’t seem like the ritual it is. Writing at night
when your eyes are bloodshot is not a good idea,
rather, try writing in the morning right after
breakfast, that is, if you have breakfast at nine or
ten and not after one, that’s called lunch by the
way.
A quick recap for any of you who just skimmed
through or someone with thicker skin on their head.
Start your book when you know you have the time
to do a significant number of pages, and when you
do start, don’t let silly Whatsapp messages ruin your
focus. Use your time wisely. Dedicate some minutes
of the day to writing, 45 to 60 minutes should be
sufficient. You can increase the time if you think you
can, but beware, pushing too hard would most
probably affect the quality of the work produced.
Is it a good idea?
There could be multiple reasons why someone, such
as you, might choose to sit down for once and type
away. A good reason to write is to make up for what
your hands have done. Don’t jump off to any
conclusions. What I mean here is that our hands
have sinned, such as the time when instead of
giving the dog food to the cat, you ate it yourself,
and other instances which cannot be mentioned
here, and writing would be the perfect action to
wash away your sins. Before any idiot thinks I am
actually serious, well, I am not. You can look at it
this way. Because you are busy writing, you would
think less about what you’re not supposed to, such
as how big of a failure you are. The basic idea here
is that due to your focus being on writing and not
something else, it becomes an effective way to
battle your addiction, any addiction. An important
point to note here is that you cannot counter your
addiction of excessive writing with writing even
more, that is, if any individual has such as issue,
which I highly doubt someone does.
Another benefit of writing is that it improves your
typing speed or writing speed incase you abide by
the traditional way. With your increased typing
speed you will be able to work faster at your
workplace, which might catch the eye of your boss,
which could lead to you getting a possible appraisal,
which could make you so happy that it pushes you
over the edge, and this excessive happiness could
make you start losing control over your body,
resulting in multiple organ failure, ultimately leading
to death. And just before you think this is an
exaggeration, we’ll, you’re wrong. This is exactly
how life works, deal with it. Other improvements
would include enlargement of vocabulary and lesser
spelling mistakes, which means you would no longer
have red ‘F’s on your science exams for spelling
mistakes and you can show off to your uninterested
friends how you now know the meaning of ‘foolish’
and ‘show-off’. Not that any of the two apply to you.
Other than that, while typing, you would look super
intelligent although this doesn’t necessarily
guarantee anything. Also, another very important
advantage of writing is that it utilizes your free time,
which instead of being spent scrolling down your
Instagram feed would be effectively spent writing,
hence, you might end up having a more productive
day.
When directly addressing the question ‘is it a good
idea?’, you should know that if you don’t know how
to write or make just too many spelling mistakes, it’s
best that you hang yourself. No, don’t do that, that’s
messed up. A better thing to do would be to hold off
for a while and read more books to get you on track.
The following extract will present to you how
spelling, grammar, punctuation and other mistakes
look like on actual paper and not just in your head:
I is staring down the chimmney. Suddenly soot my
noses. Safe me me cry. I a’m falling down roof. I
land on my ancle and crak my scrull.
If this doesn’t prove my point, then I don’t know
what will. However, you can also look at it in
another way. Such mistakes make the extract seem
slightly interesting, at least to me. I mean, who
doesn’t like those Pakistani people’s text where they
struggle to explain something, but fail miserably.
Not saying illiteracy is a joke, but such things are so
funny. So, if there is one thing you were supposed
to derive from this last chapter is that mistakes can
end up actually being works of art!
Generating ideas
This step can be quite simply tackled. Just upgrade
your brain to level 45 to unlock the idea generator.
Sadly, no such thing exists, at least now and from
what I know. On the bright side, this is not a very
difficult task. You can ideas from quite literally
anywhere. You can go outside to your garden and
write down some descriptive sentences for possibly
a scene taking place in a natural, green setting in
your book. When I was super frustrated with my
book, I stopped for a while, had a swim and jotted
down a quick descriptive account on the way back,
which I am really happy about. Have a look:
Not fully Grey, nor fully blue, the sky radiated a hint
of purple. Buildings arose and fell like huge saplings
growing and dying, as the car sped through the city.
It was going at a rate way more than the limit, but it
didn’t matter, at least to the man inside. If anyone
was awake and looking out of their balcony, they
would see a zooming black shadow, which they
would probably dismiss as a fault in their eye.
If you like it I’m glad, if not, you probably have a
very bad taste in writing! So, like me, you can do
any refreshing activity, such as swimming (to make
the ideas flowing in even better, try staying down
underwater for longer than your breath. You will
then feel water breaking into your body through
your mouth, nothing to be surprised off, this is a
perfectly normal condition. As soon as everything
starts going dark, you’ll feel the best ideas coming
to you. I am glad I could help), then try taking ideas
from your surroundings, such as the pool itself, your
garden, a restaurant, the sky outside, etc.
Generating ideas isn’t very quick, so don’t be
surprised when none come. Be open minded, look at
everything from a different perspective, the
perspective of the protagonist in a particular chapter
or throughout the book. Let’s say, our protagonist
has lost his son in a car accident, you will now have
to look at the sky, garden, home, people, other
children, etc. with the loss of the protagonist
bearing down on you. So when you’re staring at the
pool, you’d see, playing the role of the protagonist,
smiling, happy families . Children would be laughing
and splashing around in the pool, while your child
isn’t alive anymore to do either of those things. How
would it feel to lose something you hold so dear and
then to see others enjoying that very thing? A
slightly sad and depressing paragraph, but that’s a
very good way to get very relevant and emotional
ideas that can up your game.
Another way you can generate ideas is by looking at
the work of other great writers. If you’re writing
horror or even otherwise, Darren Shan and R.L Stine
have stunning books with descriptive accounts of
fear. I wouldn’t say R.L Stine’s Goosebumps is very
scary, but it still is a work of art, which explains its
popularity amongst young readers. Darren Shan on
the other hand writes books for an older audience,
which explains why you might find it frightening at
times, at least to me. A book of his I read (can’t
remember the name) had this too vivid, descriptive
account of how a young person gets maggots in
their eyes. It states that the character tries getting
the maggots out by scratching into their empty eye
socket. This is probably the only thing I can
remember from that book due to its horror.
Other great writers include Lee Child, Anthony
Horwitz, Joseph Delaney and off course, Dan Brown.
Keep in mind that I chose to put these names here
because I find their books great, but this doesn’t
mean that other writers suck, it just means that
their books are really bad! I am kidding, I just put
these names in here because these came to my
mind. A book I personally really enjoyed and
considered my favorite is Andrew Gross’s ‘The One
Man’. Give it a go if you want, you won’t regret it.
Now, you don’t need to buy all these books because
I know you’re not filthy rich enough to make a fort
out of just these bestsellers, so just go with
whatever is available. Try looking for any book in
the dusty, old book self, untouched for a century, I
am sure you’ll find something. Another option is to
borrow a book or books, if you’re really into it, from
the library or someone you know. Lastly, you have
the option to buy the book from bookstore. Doesn’t
matter if you get one book, just make sure it’s
relevant to what you’re writing. Now don’t go on and
buy a ‘collection of Swedish swear words’ if you’re
writing on cute cuddly animals. The following extract
will explain what happens if you do so:
‘oh, look at that cute doggy!’ says the woman.
She proceeds to touch the dog’s head. The dog
stares dead into her eyes before he goes wild.
‘Helvete, bloody fitta fan’ she screams. ‘Get off me’.
Don’t any of you dare translate any of those words.
Now that I’ve told you not to, I am pretty sure you’ll
do the exact opposite. Curiosity kills, mark my
words! Done searching it up? By the way, as you
know, I am not Swedish, I just took these kind
words from Pewdiepie’s videos where he was
generous enough to teach nine year Olds how to
swear in Swedish. Next chapter!
Flashbacks
Flashbacks are a very common feature, featuring in
many books. It is useful way of giving information of
the past for context in the future. Flashbacks are
usually emotional scenes where a character loses
someone or something, sees some wrong and sinful
act (such as the one you carry out every other day.
Have some control!) that haunts them for life, etc.
The advantage you get from having a flashback
scene in your novel is that you get to give the
readers the necessary information about the past
without having to go by order from past to present.
You can slip in about two or three flashback scenes,
but you can definitely go higher or lower. Keep in
mind that if you try going from present to past, then
to an earlier past, then to an even earlier past, then
to a past earlier then that past and then finally back
to present, I am pretty sure you’ll mess up the
timeline really bad. Although the above was an
exaggeration, what I mean here is that you have to
try to keep coming back to the present to keep the
reader in reality and not in some forgotten
dimension.
As flashbacks are present in many, if not most,
books, you can try referring and getting ideas from
there. Additionally, although I haven’t searched it
up, I’m pretty sure you can easily find useful
material on flashback sequences on Google. For
those of you don’t know what Google is, well, it is
goggle spelt by three year old. On the topic of
spelling mistakes, have you seen these kids flying
around spelling these easy words wrong, while
spelling inappropriate words perfectly. Good job
kids, I am sure your parents are proud of you!
Determination
The only reason why you got till here is because of a
bit of determination in combination with possibly a
bit of interest. Everything you started and then
continued consistently is because of determination
and the fear of your parents. For example, since the
time you’re going to school, you have a habit of
doing homework. You have to do it, you’re
determined to so, although I am sure other factors
play even bigger roles here. Determination is the
reason why your parents still wasted money on you,
taking that slim chance that you might be cured of
your foolishness, but you let all that money go down
the drain. There are numerous examples of
determination, far greater than those that can be
mentioned here.
In relation to book writing, it must be noted that you
can’t go on to complete the book until you actually
feel the urge too. For example, at the time of writing
this, I really want to play a game on my phone, but
then my other side jumps in and reminds me how
amazing it would feel when I see the product of my
work in my hands. Something to pick here for you is
that you should look at the long term advantages
you would get from writing a book, such as getting
famous in school, getting a new phone, not getting
kicked out from home, not being deprived of food
and drinks, etc. If you’re taking away one thing from
this chapter, then it should be that if you dreamed
of writing a book, make it reality. If you sit their in
your room reflecting on your failures and the bad
luck you brought to your house, you’ll never get
anywhere. Now go do it!
Ending it all
You started the book, giving limited information to
your reader, making them crave for more, then you
slowly increased the amount of information you
were revealing, now, you will give them the final
blow, and leave them wanting more of what your
hands have produced. Although I am aware that
every step in the writing of the book is important,
the ending is a very crucial point where your words
can define whether readers will remember your book
as a great book, so don’t mess this up, like you
always do in every matter.
If the ending of your book gives insufficient
information, the reader might be confused (like you)
on what just happened, which might frustrate them.
I mean who else wouldn’t be. You read the whole
freaking book only to find that last pages have been
torn off, at least that’s what it seems to be. On the
other hand, a book like this can be a very
unpleasant device which you can you use to torture
your friends. They read the whole book and still are
confused on what, how and why. A problem here is
that people nowadays rarely read books, which
means your torturing device has a reduced chance
of getting to the victims.
Usually books have a happy ending, but instead of
that, when you let the bad guys or antagonists win,
it makes your book stand out from other books and
also allows you to add another installment in the
future. The prime example would be Avengers
Infinity war and Avengers Endgame, both game
changing movies. If you haven’t watched them, it’s
probably because you live underground with moles.
The ending can also be an abrupt cliffhanger, but I
doubt that the readers would be happy about having
to read the other installment to find out about what
happens next, which means you’d probably receiving
emails from infuriated and frustrated readers. This
problem an be easily fixed. Don’t give any contact
email or website, that should be an effective way to
keep out the mob!
Perfection
I assume that you readers find the chapter title
deceiving because there is no such thing as a
flawless human creation, but that’s where you’re
wrong. Your aim shouldn’t be to make a flawless
book, rather, it should be to make an amazing book
by putting in all what you have. There is a difference
between the word flawless and perfection. You see,
although both words are subjective, that is, what
you find perfect might be hideous for someone else,
they are on different levels on the scale. Achieving a
flawless book is not possible, but you can surely and
definitely perfect it. I hope that none of you knew
any of the things I just mentioned in this paragraph
because now I feel that you people might have
known and I wasted my time, just like you wasted
your parent’s lives.
You can achieve perfection by perfecting your
imperfect work. This statement was definitely not in
the slightest, obvious! Anyhow, before I tell you how
to perfect your work, you must know that whatever
you do, your work will always be criticized by
someone, and in the case of some of you readers, it
might not be criticized because no one would dare
read your horrible book. Before you try imaginatively
strangling me, remember, what is horrible for me
might not be horrible for someone else. Keep in
mind that that ‘might’ is a big ‘might’, that means
that everyone will absolutely loathe your book.
Saddening isn’t it? ‘Why don’t people ever take me
seriously?’, I hear you say, well, that’s because you
are not serious about people taking you seriously,
the people around you are just unsupportive, you’re
not doing anything good enough to make them gain
seriousness or you’re just straight up, annoying the
hell out of them with your meaningless, non-serious
attitude! No offense intend, thus, none should be
taken, and if sill taken, follow the following steps: go
to your kitchen, find the sharpest knife you can find,
stare at it for a whole minute, then put it back
where you found it and proceed reading this book.
Now, let’s get back on track. How to perfect your
writing? I would strongly suggest that you do not try
perfecting your imperfect work before you end it.
That means, by no means should you leave your
book halfway through and try fixing and making the
first half better because if you do, you’ll get bored
adding and removing information from an already
formed chapter, so it’s a big ‘no’. I mean, if you’re
not stupid, you should clearly see that this chapter
has been added after the chapter ‘ending it all’.
Make the connection, you’re not meant to make
another draft before completing one, try doing that
at your own risk. Not that I’m am taking any
responsibility for any of the things I’ve mentioned in
this book, in all seriousness or humorousness. I
might have asked you to stab yourself or might ask
you later on in the book to harm animals, but that’s
a joke. Partially ,this book is meant to give you a
good time, while you also learn how impossibly
difficult, demanding, challenging and rough writing a
book is, and that would motivate you to write your
own. Yes, that’s exactly how it works!
I didn’t go off track, it was important that you know
some things, things like the things you learnt the
time when you were an innocent ten year old,
untouched by the realities of adult life, and this
Neanderthal from grade eleven just corrupts your
mind. If this is not how it was revealed to you, but it
was actually you who corrupted that grade eleven
kid’s mind, well, bravo. You have a bright future
ahead of you!
As I was saying, when you’re done with your first
draft, then for the second draft try perfecting your
work. For example, let’s say the following is a
statement made in your book:
‘once I found out that I was stupid, I really loved it.
Now, I excel at stupidity’
A more perfected version would be:
‘I didn’t know then, but now I did, and it felt
strangely good. Fast forward to today, now I teach
the course stupidity 101 at the nonexistent school of
weird arts’.
As you can probably derive, perfection can include
elaboration because to make your writing better,
you can make it more descriptive, that is, add more
information. For all those of you who think adding
excessive information is a good idea, try it, your
book will be a bestseller. However, perfection can
also be achieved through word reduction. If you
shred out some unnecessary words, your writing
would look cleaner and neater. To some extent, that
is possible and works but the following extract will
explain what happens when you become too
generous in cutting down words:
‘Her resentful eyes pierced through eyes. The man
away. Something surged through her the next
moment know it, she was on top of him. The man
took a bunch of slaps to the . This was followed by
scratching. After she was gone, the man was
uncomfortable sight look’.
I hope you had a great time trying to piece this
extract together. And yes, I am aware that this cut
version implies some weird things. I figured that was
the best way to get my important point across to
you frustrated teenagers. Its not rocket science, it’s
human science, if that wasn’t obvious. What are
you, three? It’s fine if you have the mental capacity
and processing speed of a three year old, but I
would strongly urge you to go to school. It’s usually
never too late, but in your case, I think we might be
in overtime. It’s useless crying over spilt milk, so I
think it would be better to mop that milk and even
throw away the infected mop!
If you think the act of perfecting seems a bit
difficult, it’s fine because it’s not like you can write a
perfect book the first time. Take my book for
instance, does this, by any means, look even near
perfect. No, at least that’s what I think so. I am sure
you’ve heard of the famous saying (actually a real
saying this time): ‘practice makes perfect’. I think
I’ve also innovated this very saying and used it
somewhere earlier, do you remember it? Just
asking, I know you have more things at hand then
just memorizing my book, nothing to be ashamed
of.
Receiving feedback
If you’re that sort of a person who says ‘I don’t care
what people say about me’, in that stupid squeaky
voice, well, I got good news for you, you’re not
getting anywhere in life, that’s great, right? If you
don’t hear what others say about your work, you
won’t know what people actually think about your
book. In some cases turning that deaf ear proves to
be helpful, but in the case of understanding what
your audience has to say, you need to hear them
out.
Obviously, if you don’t drop an email address or a
website, you’re spared of the spears that would
have otherwise slid through your skull. However, if
you’re writing a book once, chances are, you’ll write
another, and in order to make that book better than
the previous one, you need to know how to make it
batter. How does that happen? You ask your
audience.
Implementation
There is a difference between the people who want
to see you fall and those who want to see you rise.
Some people criticize you for your own good, so that
next time, you can make an even better book. Once
you have a list of what people think you should
improve on, which can include improvement in story
development or using better vocabulary, you should
put those problems into the problem solving
machine and solve the problem. Even if you’re not
writing another book, the criticism you get can
greatly tell you about what people expect from a
book. Accepting criticism and then implementing the
advices does not just apply singularly to writing, it
applies to all aspects of life.
I do realize that this chapter and the one before are
contradicting, but that is because your eyes are
damaged. I’ll explain it again. There are two
separate things: jealous criticisms and advices. For
example, when people say ‘you don’t know how to
write a book’, you shouldn’t let that affect you, but
when someone says ‘I think if you developed so and
so protagonists story a little more, it would have
made your book better, you should take their advice
and implement it. If that doesn’t explain my point
then I prescribe you to drink 5 liters of water. For
those of you who don’t remember (I mentioned this
earlier in the book), drinking five liters is supposed
to kill you.
Again?
If you’re reading this chapter and then actually do
another book, good job man, I like the
determination. I now realize that I might be framed
as a sexist for saying ‘man’ and all those radical
feminists would drown me in a waterless pool. Thus,
just for the sake of all those feminists, here you go:
‘good job woman (minus the first two letters)’.
I mean, when you get so used to the traditional
‘man’, saying ‘thanks woman’ doesn’t seem right. If
you don’t agree, I think we’ve just found a living,
thinking feminist reading my book! Put that book
back in the book shelf before it catches fire! I am
kidding, feminist or male feminist or not a feminist
at all, you’re reading my book, what an honor to
brainwash you! I can’t thank you enough
If you’re doing it again, go ahead. Don’t just stop on
one! If you’re doing it again, make sure that this
time the writing experience for you and the reading
experience for your readers is better than before. If
such is not the case, I don’t see why you would
write again. Let’s say, if your first book reached 120
readers, your next book should be able to get,
possibly, 100 of those and an additional 200 people
to read your book. If you think these numbers are
too low, I would like to see you try getting more.
Yes, it’s a challenge. If you get higher, I will reward
you with absolutely nothing, but if you lose, I’ll ask
your parents to sell you as a slave!