70 = SIZE 6: THE WESTERN WOMEN’S HAREM Fatema Mernissi | Fatema Mernisi (1940- ), a Moroccan feminist rit and sociologist, was born in Fez and studied i the Sor n Fea and studied at the Sor. | bonne in Pari. Her doctorate is from Brandes University in the United Suter. She has published widely in the United States and won the 2003 Prince of A for Lets along with Suan Sontag) She nn le and ws in Rab ova wb es le Mohammed V University of Rabat and a research scholar at the University Institue for Scientific Research. Her public sions include Beyond the Veil: Ma is Modern Muslim Society (197: emale Dynamics in The Veil and the Male Ele: Feminist Interpretation of Womens Rights in Islam (1988); Forgotten Queens of Islam (1990); Islam Be Denoenc Feat of the Modern World (1992): and chcherazade Goes West: Different Cultures, Differe Harems (2002). ibaa Moroccan women must hide their faces and live in a haem, ut Naser women ave mle domination inscribed into their flesh by the demands of a ‘ize 6" word fbn Ina tr by me ch eg that all women must look like adole The auton look like adolescens gins. The author thanks God the she i nota Wetern asec bog a Mu fim who can eat what she wants i Reprinted from Soheenecade Goer West: Diferent Cultures, Different Ha Imision of Simon 8 Schuster Adule Publishing Gi ion Adult Publishing Group, Copy tye right © 2002 by Fatemal = Mernissi + Size 6: The Western Womenis Harem cotton skin merican department store that I was told my hips were too large I: was during my unsuccessful attempt (0 b to fit into a size 6. That distressing experience made me realize hhow the image of beauty in the West can hurt and humiliate a woman 1s much as the veil does when enforced by the state police in extsem- ist nations such as Iran, Afghanistan, or Saudi Arabia. Yes, tha day T ‘of the keys to the enigma of passive beauty in legant saleslady in the American store looked at me without moving from her desk and said that she had no skirt my siz. “In cis whole big store, there is no skirt for me?” I sai YYou are joking.” I fele very suspicious and thought thar she just might be (oo tired to help me. I could understand chat. But then the saleswoman added a condescending judgment, which sounded to me stumbled onto one Western harem fantasies. The like an imams fatwa. Telefe no room for discussion: “You are too big!” she said. Lam too big compared to what?” I asked, looking at her intently, because I realized chat I was facing a critical culeural gap here. “Compared to a size 6,” came the salesladys reply iat is typical of those who she went 8 Her voice had a clear-cut edge to it d enforce religious laws, “Size 4 and 6 are the norm,” encouraged by my bewildered look. “Deviant sizes such as the one you need can be bought in special stores.” TThat was the frst time that I had ever heard stich nonsense about men’ flatcring comments regarding my size. In the Moroccan streets, my particularly generous hips have for decades led me to believe that ntize planet shared their convictions. Iris «rue that with advane ge, L have been hearing fewer and fewer flattering comments and sometimes the silence around me in has never met with the IFagainse the when walking in the medina, the bazaars is deafening, But since my face local beauty standards, and I have often had to defend my: remarks such as zinafr (giraffe), because of my long neck, I learned ago not to rely too much on the outside world for my sense of is T discovered when I went to that | had developed ac | did not “You know my long self-worth, In fact, paradoxically Rabat as a student, it was the self-reliance to protect myself against “beauty blackmail” chac made m to others. My male fellow students could nor beliew xc adamn about whae they thought about my body. dear,” L would say in response to one of them, “all T ne ced to survive is nMernissi * Size 6:'The Western Women's H. bread, olives, and sardines. That you think my neck is too long is you problen In any case, when it comes to beauty and compliments, nothit ite in the medina, where everything can bi negotiated. But things seemed to be different in that Americal department store. In fact, T have to confess that I lost my usual self confidence in that New York environment. Not that I am always su ‘of myself, but I don't walk around the Moroccan streets or down the university corridors wondering what people are thinking about mé OF course, when I hear a compliment, my ego expands like a cheese soufilé, but on the whole, I don't expect to hear much from other Some mornings, | feel ugly because I am sick or tired; others, | fed wonderful because it is st ut sudde is too serious or d out or I have written a good paragraph in that peaceful American store that I had entered 9) triumphantly, as a sovereign consumer ready to spend money, | fel savagely attacked. My hips, until then the sign of a relaxed and unin hibited matutity, were suddenly being condemned as a deformity. “And who says that everyone must be a size 62” I joked to the saleslady that day, deliberately neglecting to mention size 4, which is the size of my skinny twelve-year-old niece. At that point, the saleslady suddenly gave me an anxious look “The norm is everywhere, my deat,” she said. “Ies all over, in the ‘magazines, on television, in the ads. You cant escape it. There is Calvin Klein, Ralph Lauren, Gianni Versace, Giorgio Armani, Mario Valentino, Salvatore Ferragamo, Christian Dior, Yves Saint-Laurent, Christian Lacroix, and Jean-Paul Gaulticr. Big department stores go by the norm.” She paused and then concluded, “Ifthey sold size 14 of 16, which is probably what you need, they would go b: She stopped for a minute and then “Where on earth do you come fiom? I am sorry I can’t help you Really, Iam.” And she looked it too. She seem interested, and brushed off another wot attention with a cutting, "Get sor akrupe.” intrigued, ared at m all of a sudden, who was seeking her ‘one else to help you, Pm busy.” then did I notice that she was probably my age, in her late fifties. But unlike me, she had the thin body of an adolescent gidl. Her knee-length, navy blue, Chanel dress had a white silk collar cent of the subdued elegance of aristocratic F girls ac the turn of the nch Catholic school y: A pearl-studded belt emphasized the = Memissi * Size 6: The Western Women’s Harem Jinuness of her waist. With her meticulously styled short hair and the looked half my age at first glance. come from a country where there is no size for women’s clothes,” ighborhood seamstress or sophisticated makeup (old her. “I buy my own material and the n tiicman makes me the ko leather skit I want, They jst eke my casurements each time I see chem. Neither the seamstress nor I know sly what size my new skirts. We discover it together in the making No one cares about my size in Morocco as long as I pay taxes on time. Actually, I don't know what my size i, to tel you the truth, The saleswoman laughed merrily and said thae I should advertise ny country as a paradise for stressed working women, “You mean you don't watch your weight?” she inquired, with a tinge of disbelief in her Voice, And then, after a brief moment of silence, she added in a lower fogister, as if talking to herself “Many women working in highly paid d jobs could lose their positions if they didn’t keep to a fishion-rek viet diet Her words sounded so simple, bur the threat th cruel that [ realized for the first time chat mayb jolene restriction imposed on women than is the Muslim veil Quickly I said good-bye so as not to make any more demands on the saleslady’s time or involve her in any more unwelcome, confidential gs ‘cuts. A surveillance implied was so ize 6” is a more Cxchanges about age-discriminating salary was probably watching us both Nes I thought as wandered off, I have finally found the answer to my harem enigma, Unlike the Muslim man, who uses space £0 excluding women from the public es time and light, He declares that jn order to be beautiful, a woman must look fourteen years old. If she lacs to look ify, or worse, sixty, she is beyond the pale. By putting 4 framing her as the ideal of sbi. In fac, the etcenth-century establish male domination by ina, the Western man manip male child a the spotlight on the beauty, he condemns the mature woman t0 i mrodern Western man enforces Immanuel Kanes 1 theories: To be beautiful, women have © appear childish and brain- less. When a woman looks mature «ind self-assertive, or allows her hips to expand, she is condemned as ugly. Thus, the walls of the European harem separate youthful beauty from ugly macuriy. These Western atticudes, I thought, are even more dangerous and cunning than the Muslim ones because the weapon used against women is time Time is less visible, more fluid than space. The Western man uses 34 = Metnissi + Size 6:"The Western Women’s Harem = images and spotlights to freeze female beauty within an idealized childhood, and forces women to perceive aging — at normal unfolding of the years Here I am, transformed into dinosaur” [caught myself saying aloud as I went up and down the rows of skits in the store, hoping to prove the saleslady wrong —to no ava This Western time-defined veil is even crazier than the space-defined one enforced by the ayatollahs The violence embodied in the Western harem is less visible than in the Eastern harem because aging is not attacked directly, but rathet masked as an aesthetic choice. Yes, 1 suddenly felt not only very ugly but also quite useless in that store, whe as a shameful devaluation, if you had big hips, you were simply our of the picture. You drifted into the fringes of nothingness By putting the spotlight on the prepubescent female, che Western man veils the older, more mature woman, wrapping her in shrouds of uglie ness, This idea gives me the chills because it tattoos the invisible harem directly onto a woman's skin, Chinese foot-binding worked the same way: Men declared beautiful only those women who had small, child like feet. Chinese men did not force women to bandage their feet to keep them from developing normally—all they did was to define the beauty ideal. In feudal China, a beautiful woman was the one who vole untarily sacrificed her right t0 unhindered physical movement by ‘mutilating her own feet, and thereby proving that her main goal in life was to please men. Similarly, in the Western world, I was expected to shrink my hips into a size 6 if wanted to find a decent skitt tailored for a beautiful woman. We Muslim women have only one month of fasting, Ramadan, but the poor Western woman who diets has to fast twelve months out of the year. “Quelle borrewn” | kept repeating to myself, while looking around at the American women shopping. All those my age looked like youthful teenagers. Now, at last, the mystery of my Western harem made sense, Framing youth as beauty and condemning maturity is the weapon used against women in the West just as limiting access to public space is the weapon used in the East. ‘The objective remains identical in both culeures: to make women feel unwelcome, inadequate, and ugly ‘The power of the Western man resides in dictating what women should wear and how they should look. He controls the whole industry, from cosmetics to underwear. The West, I only part of the world where women’ fashion is a man’s business. In places like Morocco, where you design your own clothes and discuss shion: cd, was the = Memissi + Size 6: The Western Womeris Harem Jem with crafsmen and -women, sion is your own business. Not sin the West. y 4 Bux how docs the system function? I wondered. Why do women cept i ie that ofthe French sociologist (fall the posible explanations like that of ‘ vir Bor the at, iss ok, La Dorinton Maan «proposes something he calls “a violence symbole’: “Symbolic vo See ver which is hammered directly on the body, and lence is a form of pow “ cal constant. But this magic isif by magic, without any apparent physical constraint. pperates only because it activates the codes pounded in the deepest lay rot the body.” Reading Bourdicu, [had the impression that I finally tinderstood Western man’s psyche better. The cosmetic and fashion industries ate only the tip of the iceberg, he states, whi is why women so ready to adhere to their dictates. Something else is going on on a fir deeper level. Orherwise, why would women belt themselves yontaneousy? Why, gucs Bourdieu, would women make thee ies sore ical, for example, by peering men wha a Bea olds than they are? “The majority of Prench women wish to havea husban re ch seems consistent, bigger as Fas size is who is older and also, which s concerned,” writes Bourdieu. Caught in the enchanted a characteristic of the symbolic violence inscribed in the mysterious layers “Tehe flesh, women relinguish what he cll “les signes ordinaires de la the ordinary signs of sexual hierarchy, such as old n sponta higrarchie sexuelle,” ige and a larger body. By so doing, explains Bourdieu, women pontancity Bourdieu nncously accept the subservient position. Ie is this sp Be describes as magic enchantment. . ‘Once | understood how this magic submission worked, I becam ety happy that the conservative ayatollahs do not know about it yet: If they did, they would readily switch to its sophisticated methods, thecause they ate so much more effective. To deprive me of food is deF- y the best way to paralyze my thinking capabilities... you, Allah, for sparing me the tyranny of the ‘size 6 rie eipaid ono Paris-Casablanea harem,” I repeatedly said to myself while seated on che P ‘Lam so happy that the cons fundamentalists ight, on my way back home at ast. ae ale elite does not know abour it. Imagine the Switching from the veil to forcing women to fi size 6 How can you stage a credible political demonstration and shout in the streets that your human rights have been violated when you cannot find the right skirt? 8