THHT3: The Hollywood Hills Trilogy 3 Dark Lights - Bright Shadows

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THHT3
THE HOLLYWOOD HILLS TRILOGY VOL 3
DARK LIGHTS | BRIGHT SHADOWS
born 9/9/19
by
∆ Aaron LaLux ∆
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Cover Art By:
Rae Ma
www.rtingma.com
_______
Aaron’s Thank You’s:
I’d like to give a big shout out to anyone out there

that ever gave this runaway a place to call home.
Thank you for making this stranger feel welcome.
I am forever grateful to you all. Please know that

wherever in the word I am, I will welcome each and
every one of you with an open door, open arms,
open ears, an open heart, and an open mind.
Much Love & Respect. -Aaron
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Literary Works by Aaron LaLux
1) pub. 10/10/14; The Poetry Trilogy Vol. 1
4) pub. 7/7/16; The HH Trilogy Vol. 1:

The City of Angels
5) pub.11/11/16; The Holy Trilogy Vol. 1:

Masonic Psalms From Holy Lands

Nightmares & Daydreams
7) pub. 7/7/17; 777:

Alphas & Numerics
8) pub. 12/12/17; The Sydney Sessions:

12 Steps
9) pub. 8/8/18; The Holy Trilogy Vol. 2:

Mandalas

99 Heartbeats & Heartbreaks
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All rights reserved.

 
Published in The United States by OmniOpes Inc.
'The Hollywood Hills Trilogy Volume 3:

Dark Lights | Bright Shadows’
Copyright © 2019 by Aaron LaLux

 
Published World Wide
by Aaron LaLux & OmniOpes Inc.
This
is a work of fiction.
Names, characters, places,
& incidents either are the product of
the author's imagination or are used fictitiously.
Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead,
entities, events, or locations is entirely coincidental.
First International Edition ISBN: 978-1-950780-02-0
Manufactured in The United States of America
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True Story (A Personal Note For You)
This book almost didn’t happen. That’s right.

Not just because of the philosophical concept of how slim the
odds are of any single event ever happening, but also because
of something very tangible and specific.
Three months ago I lost my laptop, with not only all of the
2,000 poems I’ve ever written, but also the final drafts of the
77 poems that were to be used in composing the collection of
poetry for volume 3 of ‘The HH Trilogy’ (THHT3), which is
the book that you are now in possession of this very moment.
Not only did I lose the poems on my laptop, but I also lost every
other piece of writing I’d ever written on my laptop, along with
all my photos, countless important documents, priceless
business data, and everything else ever compiled into my
personal digital database of life over the past 5 years. To
make matters worse, I had absolutely nothing backed up and I
was only weeks away from purchasing a new laptop along
with transferring everything over to my new computer &
saving a copy of every document and all my other data.
Losing the laptop was my fault, and it made me literally
temporarily desperately absolutely insane. It not only
happened at the worst possible time, but it also coincided with
another stressful event, one that involved the investors of a
company I’d started buying me out of my company under
conditions that I had soon found out were, in my view,
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scandalous. So not only had I lost my laptop, with nothing
backed up, but I’d also lost my company as well.
I fell into a black hole, became very depressed, started

smoking cigarettes, and even contemplated doing some very
bad things to myself as well as others.
However, amidst the desperation I found hope. At a party in

The Hamptons, on my way to Bali, an impressionably kind
woman suggested I start a social media campaign and see if a
miracle happened. So that’s what I did. I posted ‘Lost
MacBook: REWARD’ signs up everywhere, I organized a
social media campaign on Facebook and Instagram, I offered
a $3,000 reward for my Macbook’s safe return, I contacted
pawn shops, computer stores, The Department of Justice,
The FBI, local police departments, and the homeless
communities near where it went missing, and yes, Apple.
The word spread so quickly in the town I lost the laptop in that
both local newspapers picked up on the story with headlines
that read something like, “Local Bestselling Author Loses
Laptop & Offers Massive Reward.”. I even hired several
alleged computer hackers & a private investigator. The story
went viral on social media, and reports of people saying they’d
seen my Macbook, and/or were willing to help find it, started
pouring in. I thought surely I would get it back, & spent many a
sleepless night hoping, praying, & begging for it’s safe turn.
Days turned to weeks, weeks turned to months, and although I
felt close several times, the Macbook never showed up.
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The worst part of the whole thing was that no amount of
money could ever replace the contents on that laptop. It was
literally a priceless part of my history, documented, organized,
completely unique to me, and unrepeatable. I was utterly
helpless, powerless, and unable to let go. I broke down. I shut
off. I flew to Bali, shaved every hair on my body, bathed in holy
waters, fasted, and purged, and purged and purged. And as
with any great loss, I searched for the lessons in the loss.
What I learned was the always difficult yet infinitely invaluable

lesson of impermanence. Of letting go, of releasing all that
which you believe is yours, and accepting, that yes, this too
shall pass. This all shall pass, for better or for worse.
I learned we are but an idea of our selves. We are only that
which we, and to an equal extent, others, believe us to be, and
none of this, and I mean absolutely none of this, will last any
longer than our idea of it does. We are but a passing moment
in time, briefly orbiting each other’s worlds, briefly inhabiting
this shared world, briefly existing here, and then, likely when
we least expect it, we will be gone, just like that laptop.
So I suppose this means we need to make the most of these
moments, and appreciate what/who we have while we have it/
them, for that is all there is.
And above all, be present. Spend less time dwelling in the past,
less time looking ahead to the future, & more time being
present right here and now. It’s not fair to yourself or others to
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not be present. Those that love you deserve to fully be with
you, as you do with them, and that’s only going to happen if we
learn to truly let go of the past, forget about the future, & be
right here, right now, together with ourselves and others.
And I suppose if those reading this realize that, and share this
realization with others, then all of our collect loses, including
that of my MacBook, will be a little less painful, and a little
more worth it. seriously, nothing is permanent, and we never
really have anything anyways, so when something goes let it
go and get back to the moment you’re living right now ASAP.
Anyways, thanks for reading, and I hope you enjoy the new
new poems in this book. I honestly wrote them for you. As for
the old poems lost, well, I suppose the unpublished ones have
returned back to where they once came, & the published ones
are out there online in my previous volumes of work, unable to
ever be edited or rewritten again. Such as life.
That’s All For Now.
Still Living One Day At A Time, Day By Day, Word By Word,
With Love & Respect, Loyally Yours,
- Aaron LaLux
Cali, Colombia; August 8th, 2019
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Definitions of Pop Poetry (For Clarity’s Sake)
As the founder of the sub-genre Pop Poetry it’s time I clear a

few things up. I’m breaking my silence now due to Pop Poetry
getting lots of attention lately, and me wanting to insure that
real Pop Poetry is respected as the legitimate literary art form
that it is. Because it’s not simply one sentence jots without any
reference. This being said I’ve written the following as a point
of reference to hopefully help in clearing things up a bit.
I’m the founder/inventor/creator of Pop Poetry. I started

writing Pop Poetry over a decade ago, before I knew what to
call it. I published volume 1 of The Poetry Trilogy on
10/10/14. At 2400 pages The Poetry Trilogy was/is, the
largest collection of poetry published. Due to the popularity of
TPT I received lots of inquiries as to the kind of poetry it was.
Being naturally antisocial, and avoiding the limelight when
possible, I ignored these inquiries, though it got me thinking. At
first I wasn’t sure what to call the literature I was producing. I
knew it was poetry but other than that wasn’t sure. However I
was sure it didn’t fit into any pre-existing sub-genres. It was
nothing like the writings from past Greats, nor did it fit into the
one sentence poems from the new wave of Instagram poets
either. I started to sincerely ponder my writings in order to
establish what exactly the sub genre I’d unintentionally created
was. This investigation led me to notice 4 common themes in
Pop Poetry that I’ve listed below for clarity’s sake.
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1.) Pop Poetry references aspects of other pop genres. For
instance, a Pop Poem might incorporate a song title, and the
singer of that song as well. Some proses have several pop
references in them, referencing different areas of pop culture,
such as both a song and a film, the following is an example:
“The sun is out, but still there’s Purple Rain falling down,
& I’m not a Prince, so I don’t wear a crown,
just this halo in the City of Angels,
with some bad actors like Nicolas Cage acting out.”
The above example references the song title, ‘Purple Rain’,

the artist’s name, ‘Prince’, and references a film, ‘City of
Angels’, as well as the film’s leading actor, ‘Nicolas Cage’.
2.) Pop Poetry references different aspects of pop culture,

not just genres. For instance, social media, trends, news
stories, etc. Examples of subjects that Pop Poems might
contain are; Facebook, Instagram, iPhones, Celebrities, etc.
3.) Pop Poetry poems are ideally written “on location”. For
example, I’m from Hollywood, California, yes, that Hollywood.
I know lots of famous and respected people in the scene who
get invited to exclusive events at houses in the hills as well as
to Hollywood’s hottest clubs, and I’ll often be seen at these
events with a writing book, sipping champagne in a VIP booth,
catching vibes, and writing it all down in the form of poems
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that describe everything that’s happening. I’ve actually met
quite a few great connections from people who walked up to
me at events and asked me what I was writing, and many
celebrities as well as people in The Industry are avid readers
of my books. I won’t obviously won’t drop any names.
4.) Pop Poetry has a wide and diverse reader base. Pop
Poems are as capable of captivating the attention of a 15
year old boy in India as much as a 50 year old woman in
Brooklyn. Pop Poems are meant to be “easily mentally
digestible”. That’s why the best Pop Poets write in triple
entendres. That way “the masses” appreciate the work as
much as “the intellectuals” do, albeit for different reasons.
Keep all this in mind when reading my pieces and you’ll soon
have a clear definition of what Pop Poetry is. You’ll find 100’s
of examples of pop culture references written on location in
this book, some so obscure you may not recognize them. So if
you read a line in one of my pieces you don’t understand, just
look it up online and find the reference. Also if you read a word
that is “misspelled”, it’s likely intentional because it’s me
inventing a word that didn’t previously exist.
Alright, there you go, Anything else, just ask.
- Aaron LaLux
Cali, Colombia; August 8th, 2019
Δ
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Based on A True Story…
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Δ
What’s up,
what’s going on with you these days,
how have you been where have you been,
just letting you know that I still love you…
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Δ
99 Heartbeats & Heartbreaks

1.} R.M. Drake & R.H. Sin
2.} Racing With Jaden (Rideout to The Hideout)
3.} Remember Your Self
4.} Restless Confessionals
5.} Right Back At You
6.} Rihanna (Bad Girl with a Good Heart)
7.} RIP Dr. Michael Bowie Prince
8.} RIP MAC
9.} Rising Stars
10.} Runaway Slaves
11.} Runaway Train
12.} San Franpsycho (The Dark Crystal)
13.} Sanctuary in Los Angeles
14.} Saturday Night Fever
15.} Scarlet The Armored Harlot
16.} Screen Crack
17.} Screws Loose
18.} Sexual Healing
19.} She Shares Her Happiness
20.} Sick of Being Sick, Tired of Being Tired
21.} Sigur Ros
22.} Skeleton Keys (Adaptation of Koto Song)
23.} Slipping
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24.} Smile (Gloria Carter)
25.} So Close (We’re Almost There)
26.} So Far Gone
27.} So The Man In The Mirror Is Leaving Neverland
28.} So Over It
29.} Social (Dis) Functions
30.} Somewhere In California
31.} Somewhere In Silverlake
32.} Somewhere Over The Rainbow
33.} Son of A Gun
34.} Soul Dreaming (Lost & Found)
35.} Soul Food (Bon Appetit)
36.} Space Needle (Record Spins)
37.} Speaking Easy (Salsa Rock)
38.} Spontaneous Combustion
39.} Stay Blessed
40.} Steven Spielberg
41.} Still So Emo
42.} Still Running
43.} Story of O.J. (Shawn Carter)
44.} Strengthening
45.} Stupid Cupid (Love Hurts)
46.} Such A Beautiful Proposal (Izzy Is)
47.} Suicidal Narcissist
48.} Sunday Fundays
49.} Sunglasses, Bathrobe, & Sarongs
50.} Tea With Yoda
51.} Teach Me How To Love
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52.} Teenage Instagram Models
53.} Teeter Totter
54.} Text Junkie
55.} Text You Later
56.} Thanks &. Praise (I’ll Eat Her Face)
57.} That 4:00am Feeling
58.} That That Is (Mike Posner Vibes)
59.} The Basketball Diaries
60.} The Dark Side of The Moon
61.} The Greatest Love Story Ever Told
62.} The Hills Have Eyes
63.} The Reckless Abandon of Actions In Love
64.} The Revenant
65.} The Rose Garden (Dee-Lish)
66.} The Secret Life of Walter Mitty
67.} The Valley of Sin
68.} Things Fall Apart
69.} This Experimental Life
70.} Throwing A Party & You’re Invited
71.} Till The End (In The Name of Love)
72.} Timelines
73.} Too Late Tonight
74.} Tracy Batman
75.} Tye-Dyed
76.} Unconditionally
77.} Valley Boy
78.} Vegas Baby (Center of The Pyramid)
79.} Venice Beach
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80.} Vibing While Waving The White Flag
81.} Vice Grips
82.} Victim Mentality
83.} Warning Shots
84.} We Are Now
85.} Welcome Home
86} What Do You Have To Say For Yourself
87.} What’s Up?
88.} Wheel of Fortune
89.} When Angels Cry
90.} Whiplash (Miles & Miles)
91.} Widows
92.} Won’t Die Wondering
93.} Wonder Woman
94.} Words
95.} WTF
96.} Yes, I Dance In Yesterday’s Tomorrow
97.} You Are An Ocean (I Am A Seashell)
98.} Your Story To Tell
99.} Yours Truly
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R. M. Drake & R.H. Sin [1]
RM Drake RH Sin, when the Hell will you get out of your shell,
& stop being so depressing, you’re too old to be emo,
we all feel depressed so what, please step up,
be the leaders you are, feature a bit more hope in your posts,
get the fck out of your shells,

we’re all depressed as hell & oppressed as well,
but the suppression that happens & oppression that saddens,
as a result of depression, is worse than the depression itself,
especially when it all stems from our own perception of Self,
ask yourself,
what is fame & wealth,
what does it mean to you,
what does it mean when you roll through,
a bro’s spot & he says this girl he’s with knows you,
but she doesn’t know you she only knows your poetry,
no you don’t know me so don’t approach me like you know me,
I mean yeah I’m lonely but only because I don’t like company,
it’s voluntary, so just because someone says they know me,

doesn’t mean I know them, so when, I see them approachin’,
I draw my drawbridge up, let the flood gates open,
then rain on their parade or better yet snow like a snowman,
their depressing Emo words are cliche, so cliche it hurts,
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neither reserved nor flirts, they write words in the 3rd,
but it doesn’t work, meanwhile we’re getting what we deserve,
on course for the 4th & I’ll 2nd the motion but 1st things 1st,
1st,
who broke your heart, who caught you off guard,
who led you through the desert to quench your thirst,
only to get you there & you to find out it was all but a mirage,
left you at a place alone with no place to call home, no home,
no Macaulay Culkin, just a hotel room with a big backyard,
my God, all blessed, no more sins, no more stress,

no RM Drake, no RH Sin, no LA Lux, no hate, all love,
please, don’t mistake this love for hate, this isn’t a shot fired,
this’s love, this’s Freedom’s Gates, this’s us, on fire, this’s me,
begging you, to make peace with your demons & release them,
we can all be a bit nasty, we can all be a bit dark,
the Brightest Lights cast the Darkest Shadows,
let’s bring our darkness to light it’s time to emerge,
it’s time to get the fck out of your shells,

we’re all depressed as hell & oppressed as well,
but the suppression that happens & oppression that saddens,
as a result of depression, is worse than the depression itself…
Δ LaLux Δ
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Racin’ With Jaden (We Rideout To The Hideout) [2]
We’re riding, shining too bright to be hiding,

silent till we strike like lightning, no lyin’ it feels like we’re flying,
because this electric car, feels more like a spaceship,
all the buzz you bet, we are the greatest in this matrix,
my life is based on a true story,

the trends are the newest but the message is ancient,
our live’s are all based on true stories,
this is our world, so it’s our responsibility to save it,
used to ride dirty, in a hybrid with my eyes red,

in a Toyota Prius, with a comatose penis,
now I ride in an all electric, with inventive Eccentrics,
on the Erys Agenda in a Tesla, yes sir clean as a whistle,
used to use the pen as a sword,

now I use the laptop as a missile,
sorry that I’m not sorry if I dissed you,

it’s not that I intentionally missed you I just haven’t noticed,
because I’ve been in another ozone zoning on my own poems,
keeping the Vision going mind on the mission super focused,
listen, we’re livin’ in the future not askin’ for permission,

while most are passed out in the past hand on their pelvis,
out to lunch, better catch up, no hamburgers no ketchup,
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this isn’t a damn it sandwich all hammed up, can’t SPAM us,
this is a valid salad with fresh greens & other Supreme things,
blessing dressing on top, pay attention when addressing us,
we’re importing important portions that’re just enormous,

it’s obscene the things we’ve seen, but fck,
still trying not to cuss too much, but what the fck,
got so much but sometimes too much still isn’t enough,
probably heard that before,

probably didn’t know that was a line I wrote,
see when over a million people have read your words,
they get rewritten over time as well as re-spoken in re-quotes,
rewritten but not flea bitten, see there’s a real difference,

& yeah I know that the difference is a line & that line’s fine,
& often crossed when a message is lost & spirit leaves body,
but not when the line is heard in song & sung along in hymns,
‘cause people know those lines are mine, albeit subliminally,

especially when I know for sure those lines are mine,
I guess that’s what happens when your work outgrows you,

when you hear words you wrote in songs & quotes,
& it gives you that potent mix of anxiety & adrenaline,
which leads to speeding by throttling clutches like throats,
heading north on America’s most west coast road,
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with America’s most wanted, but we’re not fugitives,
we’re notables with works that are quotable,
rolling through life like we roll on this Pacific Coast road,
top down, music loud, winged doors closed,
going 100+ MPH with no MPG up the PCH,
no MPG because the ride is all electric, which is why,
we are never gonna run outta gas as we run this lifelong race,
racin’ with Jaden we ride out to my Topanga hideout,

got a whole 10 acre mountain top with 360°views up there,
we go whenever we need to get ghost from foolish folks,
their flashing lights, Hellish cells, & their blank faced stares,
& that’s why we’re riding, shining too bright to be hiding,

silent till we strike like lightning, no lyin’ it feels like we’re flying,
because this electric car, feels more like a spaceship,
all the buzz you bet, we are the greatest in this matrix,
this is our world, so it’s our responsibility to save it…
Δ LaLux Δ
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Remember Your Self [3]
I don’t write because I want to, it’s not exactly pleasurable,

I write because I have to, it’s an addiction, it’s compulsory,
I write because someone’s got to document the events of us,
& our experiences in the collective epoch in this living history,
this whirlwind life that’s such a rush of blurs it’s obscured,

especially in a place as stimulating as Hollywood,
where it’s all too easy to get lost in the intoxicating limelights,
especially when ego strokes are handed out free-of-charge,
expensive tastes are paid, constant cheap thrills are supplied,
there’s an open bar complete with complimentary bottles,
models that’re gorgeous, fortunes that’s enormous sized,
inside are pop chart artists, lots of toxins for thirsty nostrils,
plus encore nights, because you always get the hottest invites,
to the most exclusive events to party with American idols,
but in the sauce of all that awesomeness,

try not to forget yourself & get lost in it,
see Hollywood can certainly be good for your ego,
but can also be bad for your health & often is,
Hollywood,
where people don’t care who you are, only what you are,
Hollywood,
where people only care about you as long as it feeds their ego,
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even though one must starve the ego to feed the soul,
they should know, you must starve the ego to feed the soul.
Though it seems these days we’ve got it all backwards,

we feed the ego while starving the soul,
see these superficial feelings are only emotional actors,
our selves are the stage & they’re just playing their roles,
kinda like when you think it’s me that you’re holding,

but in reality it’s just my body it’s not my soul you hold,
oh I’m first to admit I see all of this, but I’m not an Apologist,
so I don’t apologize, see I’m an Emotional Anthropologist,
so I write words with no apologies to try & describe all of this,
for all of us in the form of Poetic Literary Ambiance Lists,
I write these soulful love letters, to our future past selves,

so hopefully we can remember to remember the memories,
& in turn remember remember our selves,
& that’s why I write these literary anthropologies,
I don’t write because I want to, it’s not exactly pleasurable,

I write because I have to, it’s an addiction, it’s compulsory,
I write because someone’s got to document the events of us,
& our experiences in the collective epoch in this living history..
Δ LaLux Δ
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Restless Confessionals [4]
We don’t need to take a break, we don’t need to settle down,

don’t need to be understood, just accepted in the moment now,
I mean if you’re really asking because you really care,
I’ll tell you exactly what we need, this can be my confessional,
what we really need is love that is unconditional,
what we really need is real love that is reciprocal,
but we get neither though we give both, Aphrodite is a cheater,
makes us want to give up ‘cause the love’s not mutual,
we’re all in mourning for lost loves that we knew before,
which is why we wear all black all the time like it’s a funeral,
impatient & pacing, restlessly waiting for the departed to go,
wrestling this mess of heartless kids that all feel stressed,
but it wouldn’t be this difficult in fact it’d be effortless,
if we’d just let ourselves be comfortable enough to confess,
confess to me what you really see,
when you look in the eyes of a Poetic Tragedy,
Emo Souls in a world spinning outta control,
pride competing with ego getting so many things so easily,
when all we really need is a home that can be our sanctuary,
a place where we don’t have to do anything except be,
we don’t need to take a break, we don’t need to settle down,

don’t need to be understood, just accepted in the moment now.
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 27 ∆
Right Back At You [5]
Sometimes,
you are so concerned with your own Heart,
that you don’t see the Hearts that you’re breaking,
so worried about getting hurt,
that you don’t see who you’re hurting,
so busy with your own feelings,
that you don’t take the time for other people’s feelings,
& you end up doing to others,
exactly what you attempted to prevent others from doing,
& Lord knows I’m not throwing stones,

because I’m definitely not any better than you at this,
I’ve built my walls so tall that no one can get in at all,
so remote that I don’t even make eye contact when having sex,
but at least I don’t front & pretend to care,

by wearing fake smiles for sitting close with distant stares,
dressing up accomplices in empty compliments,
& wearing plastic flowers in my dyed hair,
better to to frown in one’s face & tell it to them straight,

than give false flatterings, while gossiping behind their back,
would rather get slapped in the face than stabbed in the back,
you pretend to defend but secretly the defense is an attack,
you’re not even happy with yourself,
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you’re simply miserable, just admit it,
why pretend that you are happy about your sadness,
hid your heart so far in the dark the sunshine can’t even get in,
whole persona is a poem or better yet the tragedy of Hamlet,
but you can’t fool Me,

I see your sadness for exactly what it is,
in between fake laughs false compliments,
& passive aggressive insulting attacks,
I see your sadness that you hide behind those name brands,
Drew House with fake smiles can’t fool me nor impress me,
the only way to get ride of your darkness is to let it go,
share Yourself with others like Shia did with #IAMSORRY,
made some mistakes a couple hundred times but it’s okay,
find a Purpose like Justin admit your mistakes & say Sorry,
you’re beautiful just the way you are, mistakes paved the way,
you are a living Self Portrait, put your colors on display,
& admit you were so concerned with your own heart,
that you didn’t see the Heartbreaks that you made…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 29 ∆
Rihanna (Bad Girl With A Good Heart) [6]
I’ve got a Bad Girl,

yeah I’ve got a Rihanna,
hot as summer in Barbados,
hot as Tahiti Beach in The Bahamas,
she goes off like bras at Crop Over or Carnival,
& when she’s going in there’s no pauses or commas,
does me when she wants to ‘cause she does what she wants to,
a Bad Girl with a Good Heart,

makes us a good match,
because I’m a Bad Boy with a Good Heart,
so together we’re both all good & all bad,
she’s an Eventful Rebel, an Angel a Devil,

but when alone she does whatever I say,
don’t want to be told she’s too young by those that don’t know,
so for the sake of staying drama free I won’t say her age,
though I will say Rihanna was signed to Def Jam at 16,

& proceeded to release her first album ‘Music of The Sun’,
which would go on to sell more than 2 million copies,
& she’s still going strong now at the grown age of 31,
but either way I still won’t say my Bad Girl’s age,

because these days everyone wants to judge your love,
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but if two people are in love & both or legally grown ups,
then who the hell is some else to judge another’s love?
Loveless Haters always pointing fingers,

but she’s of legal age & we love each other exclusively,
so mind your own business get outta here & get a life Hater,
or better yet get a love because it’s obvious you’re lonely,
but no I’m not being defensive even if I sound offensive,

because defense is not what I meant,
I’m just saying this is still a free world isn’t it,
so there’s no problem as long as there’s consent,
plus I already confronted her when I told her I was 36,

almost twice her age wanted to be sure she was okay with this,
so I asked her if it was a problem,

to which she replied,
“You think I want an immature ignorant little boy,
or a mature well traveled & grown up guy?”,
“I want to be with a real man,
that I can have real conversations with,
an entertaining international world traveling man,
not a boring domestic domesticated local kid.”,
to this, I could not refute,

plus it helped, that she was & is really cute,
THH3 31 ∆
so I offered her a trip, overseas to exotic lands,
I offered her memories, but didn’t offer her my hand,
I took her on adventures,

that she’ll remember for a lifetime,
because we’re a good fit, I’m a Bad Boy with a Good Heart,
who loves to bath naked in sunshine & rage in the night time,
just like her,

just like her, a misunderstood intellectual,
& that’s why we have an incredible relationship,
that just happens to be both sensual as well as sexual,
consensual as well as spiritual,
& I know it sometimes seems wrong,

but honestly it’s not wrong it’s just radical,
& that’s why we’re a perfect match,
because I’m a Bad Boy & she’s a Bad Girl,
I’ve got a Bad Girl,

yeah I’ve got a Rihanna,
she’s hot as summer in Barbados,
she’s hot as Tahiti Beach in The Bahamas,
she goes off like bras at Crop Over or Carnival,
& when she’s going in there’s no pauses or commas…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 32 ∆
RIP Mr. Michael Bowie Prince [7]
Prince died, Mike died, Bowie died, & democracy lied,

seems like such a depressing time to be alive,
feels like,
everything we’ve ever believed in is an outright lie,
feels like,
we get defeated every time we try so why even try?
Feels like,
lots of people talk, but no one says how we really feel,
turn on the radio & all we hear is distracting propaganda,
brought to you by good special kids with bad record deals,
calling it The Cult of Consumerism is not a euphemism,

it’s exactly what it is, Magic Realism is still real,
as it continues consuming innocents through user creationism,
promoted by Human Ads that are Fads with mass appeal,
meanwhile our real prophets continue to be slaughtered,

from MLK & JFK getting shot, to Marley getting cancer,
you think it’s a coincidence that Prince died at his residence,
exactly one year after getting back his masters?
All questions no answers,

feeling old, fed up & frustrated, like grandpa Bernie Sanders,
THH3 33 ∆
feeling like K. Dot, no crowd control,
I shout out loud, “Ground Control to Major Tom!”,

outside insane dancing in “Purple Rain, Puuuurple Raaain,”,
feeling like a passive observer as they actively murder,
democracy in this Neo-Liberal-Con-Spiracy campaign,
& I’m just as guilty hands just as filthy hands up can’t breathe,
still I’m shouting out ‘till my heart gives out, “Not in my name!”,
politics is a pile of tricks, crowded with abusive pricks,

that’re all about as useful as a loose knit bag of d!cks,
what a crock of sh!t, the fix is in, the whole system is rigged,
& those most affected don’t even attempt to change it,
because they’re so used to it, they don’t see the use of it,
so they don’t vote, even though the problems are obvious,
& those in power have too much to lose to shift or fix it,
they stand to benefit the most so they don’t act frictionous,
don’t want to rock the boat ‘cause they sit where the profit is,
so stupid acts continue because stupid does what stupid is,
nothing improves things move to the tune of usual business,
& to tell the truth I’m confused too tell me are you feeling this,
don’t know what to put our faith in,

the drinks are free, but it seems like our soul keeps payin,
everything cost,
nothing’s free except for these thoughts,
THH3 34 ∆
living in a nightmare but I still have a dream like ML King,
& I hope to find salvation before all hope is lost,
lost, I’m so lost,

trying to connect the dots or have some control like K. Dot,
& I want to write some words,

that will actually change something,
but I don’t really think any words,
will actually change anything,
& I’m all out of advice,

& everyone that used to feel alive has died,
still it’s One Love One Light, though I’m out of reasons for life,
don’t know what to do so I ask you, “You have any advice?”,
because Prince died, Mike died, Bowie died, & democracy lied,
& it seems like such a depressing time to be alive,
feels like,
everything we’ve ever believed in is an outright lie,
feels like,
we get defeated every time we try so why even try?
Do you know why, if you do please tell,

‘cause I’m searching for some hope & hoping you are as well…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 35 ∆
RIP MAC [8]
Got the news today,

that Mac Miller died tonight,
had to walk it off,
just to try & get my wronged mind kinda right,
they say the good die young,

& Mac was one of the good guys,
never rapped about capping fools or jacking dudes,
just rapped about getting high & living his best life,
dead at 26,
RIP MAC,
& yeah he missed The 27 Club by a few months,
but he was way ahead of his time so we’ll give him a pass,
damn,
& fans want to blame Ariana Grande,
but the fact is that those that are trapped in the blackness,
are often too gone to get out even when they let the light in,
can’t blame Ariana for all the pain Mac was already in,
sure maybe she pushed him a bit, but that was it,
if she stayed any longer she’d have risked him taking her with,
plus what’s a little push, when already on the edge of that Cliff,
that Cliff of Abyss,
THH3 36 ∆
he was going sooner or later, his lyrics prophesized,
not that that makes the pain any better or things more right,
& maybe that’s why I hesitate to put anyone on these days,
‘cause nice as it seems it’s easy to get burned by the Limelight,
can’t get my mind right, I think I’ve lost it,

a combination of Mac Miller & Hunter S. Thomson,
totally out of it, in a bright fisherman’s hat & dark sunglasses,
out of my mind, don’t even know which flip-flops I put on,
or what day it is, or what time it is,
or why my socks are mismatching & my wardrobes all wrong,
all I know is it's sunset, & I’m on Sunset,

just made my entrance & already I want to exit,
on the red carpet at the Grammy’s in some Pajammies,
should just be glad to be here, but I’m just mad & anxious,
desperate that Mac left, a workaholic just like Mac was,

just finished my 8th book, already want to write more poems,
but first I want to mourn some more ‘cause I’m not done yet,
plus I’ve already written more than any other poet known,
get invites but I don’t want to go out in public,

because I can’t hide behind a disguise so the pain’s showin’,
even with oversized designer sunglasses on,
everyone wants to get my attention, all I want to get is going,
so don’t be surprised if I drop outta sight,
to go hide poolside, fix breakfast, & go swimmin’,
THH3 37 ∆
thinking it might help to wash off this hot sauce,
as well as this depression I’m in from this twisted life I'm livin’,
in The Zone, outta reach, on drugs, off my rocker,

alone on a beach like the video ‘Stay’, edges getting softer,
need some Self Care but this E has got me feeling smarter,
so I don’t care because this feels like The Best Day Ever,
know these drugs will be the death of me but I can’t get off her,
high as skyscrapers, dehydrated, please pass the water,
a constant talker, time to take a break, & let the music play,
put the needle to the record, let it play, as the lights get darker,
round & round it goes,

everyone visits but no one stays,
so give them their roses while they’re still here to hold them,
because eventually everyone goes way,
got the news today,

that Mac Miller died tonight,
had to walk it off,
just to try & get my wronged mind kinda right,
they say the good die young,

dead at 26, RIP MAC,
& yeah he missed The 27 Club by a few months,
but he was way ahead of his time so we’ll give him a pass…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 38 ∆
Rising Stars [9]
Saw a film called Baby Driver,

found out the name of the lead character was Miles,
which is ironic since the film’s star reminded me of Miles,
not Miles the fictional name in the film but Miles the real actor,
might not know the name, but you’ve seen the face,
War Dogs, Top Gun, Project X, Whiplash, he’s a rising star,
we’re the future, our whole crew is, pretty much,
a bunch of a young Tom Cruises, on the Edge of Tomorrow,
on The Cutting Edge of today as well, more or less,

as loyal to each other as The Goonies, junior Josh Brolins,
so please do pray tell, what would you do for crew love,
what risks would you take what lengths how far would you go?
I wondered, as I cried tears of joy at the end of Baby Driver,

all choked up, I got that tight feeling in my throat,
I have this thing where I cry when I watch films on planes,
& though it’s a thing I cried with Baby Driver more than most,
film reminded me that we all have a past we run from,

that we all have hopes & goals that we run to too,
that the more talented we are the more we get used,
that we all hope to die without regrets & are resurrected anew,
& that we are all on that road to the future,
even though we don’t know where this road goes,
THH3 39 ∆
where will you go when the lights go out,
when the music is over & gone is the the crowd,
where will you go when you’re done being of service,
where will you go, what will you live for,
what do you live for, who do you love, why do you love them,
& is the love so much that it’s them you’re willing to die for,
thought there was more to this Life Play,

more to this Charade than just some live action,
more to this Drama than just this karma drama,
more to this Love story than just these love interests,
is this it, is this all she wrote, I suspect it is but I still don’t know,
guess no one really knows until after they go,
trying to fight off The End, don’t want to see those credits roll,
even though I know you know that every bridge has it’s toll,
& eventually we all have to pay off the Pied Piper,
that’s just the way it goes,
so where will you go when the lights go out,

when the music is over & gone is the the crowd,
what are you going to do, with all that pain you hold,
it’s not a question of if, it’s a question of when you’ll let it go,
let it go,
I know pain is the gasoline in your veins that you use for fuel,
that keeps you going, but it no longer serves you,
THH3 40 ∆
& yeah Life can be tough, but please don’t take it personal,
tell me when you’re on that stand,

& your character witnesses are called,
will they say you showed the most of your good virtues,
or will they say the evil effected too much of your soul?
Every day is Judgement Day, Life like Death waits for no one,
technically this’s a poem, but spiritually this prose’s an omen,
just hope it’s a good one, good as the film I just saw,
the one that reminded me, that we are all stars,
the film I saw was called Baby Driver,

found out the name of the lead character was Miles,
which is ironic since the film’s star reminded me of Miles,
not Miles the fictional name in the film but Miles the real actor,
might not know the name, but you’ve seen the face,
War Dogs, Top Gun, Project X, Whiplash, he’s a rising star,
we’re the future, our whole crew is, pretty much,
a bunch of a young Tom Cruises, on the Edge of Tomorrow,
on The Cutting Edge of today as well, more or less,

as loyal to each other as The Goonies, junior Josh Brolins,
so please do pray tell, what would you do for crew love,
what risks would you take what lengths how far would you go?
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 41 ∆
Runaway Slaves [10]
If you don’t have patience,

that weight might get you 4 to 8,
if you don’t pace it, that impatience,
plus that weight, might make your loved ones have to wait,
but I guess that risking 4 to 8 is better than living a 9 to 5,

just like it’s better to be tried by 12 than carried by 6,
& I know you’re restless from years of oppression,
so you feel the urge to splurge when you get Roddy Ricch,
I mean we used to be kings & we want the world to know,

that’s why we wear bling because we want it to show,
but it’s best to keep things on the down low,
it’s best to move around town slow, when moving around blow,
best to not shine too much, when moving that white uncut,
best to be low-key when lifting whole keys, believe me I know,
made a killing without killing, had a million in my sock drawer,

was chillin like villain illin’ so hard, I thought I needed a doctor,
agents & narcos are not that different, they both hold guns,
fearlessly serving powerful organizations faithfully with honor,
served so many dishes I guess they finally got suspicious,
they needed assistance that’s what they brought the cops for,
I had the game on lock but knew I had to pivot & ditch it,
by making legit business investments with my partners,
THH3 42 ∆
got what I could out the game then got out the game,
one of the best days of my life was the first time I paid taxes,
fact is 20 to life is too long to be locked up,
but taking a minimum wage is fct up so I took my chances,
& as soon as I was able to leave the game alone,
I started taking bank loans instead of taking label advances,
I guess you could say I found a way to activate & instate,
my own form of Affirmative Action,
runaway slaves still runnin,

nothing’s been abolished,
it’s just these days there’s gold on our chains,
& the whips come with wheels & are more polished,
these days discrimination doesn’t discriminate by skin tone,

these days discrimination is mostly based on net income,
we were once kings,

until they turned us into pawns,
now most of us are just corporate meat,
to be roasted up as sausages on Uncle John’s Farm,
how quickly one can go from,
being Father King to Uncle Tom,
these cities were never meant for us,
that’s why we’re restless & never feel at home,
anxious yes but if you don’t have patience,

THH3 43 ∆
the whole farm’s for sale,

there’s much more at stake than just steak,
Holy Cow where are we now,
somewhere between Chance & Fate,
somewhere between being total failures & absolute greats,
not a rapper not a chance, at least not anymore,

not here to sing & dance, I am not anybody’s whore,
this is Capitalism gone wrong,

Consumerism gone rouge,
where every new idea seems so past passé,
that it’s out of Style before it’s even En Vogue,
Yo,
yo yo yo Yo MTV Raps got you to dance,
but all those black faces dancing got the white pockets paid,
& most of the One Hit Wonders didn’t even get a 2nd chance,
gave all our time to Time Warner, didn’t even warn a brother,
see we all know, Warner Brothers is anything but a brother,
from the corner office, right back to that corner,
from the lime light, right back to those street lights below,
THH3 44 ∆
better get right, better save & invest,
we could get an island for what we spend on these diamonds,
know when to hold ‘em know when to fold ‘em,
know when to go, you know the rest, it’s all about timing,
& with that it’s time for me to go,

just remember to be aware, be patient & most of all be careful,
because if you don’t have patience,

runaway slaves still runnin,

nothing’s been abolished,
it’s just these days there’s gold on our chains,
& the whips come with wheels & are more polished,
these days discrimination doesn’t discriminate by skin tone,

these days discrimination is mostly based on net income,
runaway slaves still runnin…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 45 ∆
Runaway Train [11]
Rapidly headed in unknown directions,

no visionary directors just reactionary actors,
armed with egos, equipped with good looks & bad intentions,
no Tarantinos or Pacinos just Wiseaus & Frasers,
in despair, staring in vanity mirrors, sweating bullets,

trying to prepare by applying enough makeup to fake it,
in dressing rooms getting all dolled up & all hyped up,
going over lines assuming they’re the sum of excitement,
but when the curtain goes up & the stage lights light up,
the crowd realizes the stars are paralyzed, stage frightened,
terrified at how outta control Life’s scary ride is this high up,
lights are on, mic’s on, but the only sound is awkward silence,
& then it dawns on everyone, we all overpacked & overreact,

so much even the stagehand’s got a hype man to hype him up,
in A Room with a View, in our James Ivory Tower,

all the world’s a stage, don’t take my word, ask Shakespeare,
& that’s okay with me, just be sure to adjust the lighting,
appropriately, so that we can see the fakes clear from here,
oh dear, vertigo is taking hold, about to faint here,

feeling claustrophobic, moving through auto-tuned aerobics,
grooving to auto-tuned Muzak, in a space elevator,
THH3 46 ∆
having a nervous breakdown, but no one seems to notice,
please get off me, I need some space to breathe,

please start walking, I need some space to see,
please cease, I need some space to find the time I need,
to escape these stereotypes, break out this cage & be free,
these preconceived notions from the public don’t shape me,

they only define me, I am the negative of all they’re claiming,
acquire all they deny me, public’s eye doesn’t really bother me,
as I offer everything up for free except these apologies,
as we,
four wheel drive on this rough road,
a million directions to choose from,
but really only one way & place we can really go,
here we go,
rapidly headed in unknown directions,

no visionary directors just reactionary actors,
armed with egos, equipped with good looks & bad intentions,
no Tarantinos or Pacinos just Wiseaus & Frasers…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 47 ∆
San Franpsycho (The Dark Crystal) [12]
Lost,
amongst the chaos, caught outside with a long way to go,
calm,
within the center, inside everything comes 360° full circle,
call it a circle but it’s more of a spiral,

careful don’t want to hurt you when I go psycho,
but the truth is the first rule of nature is survival,
chaos outside crack pipes alight demoralized fools act suicidal,
see healing can help but it can also hurt you,

especially if you forget your virtues,
trust me you must be occasionally criticized passionately,

for acting out irrationally if not you’re not living your truth,
too caught up in your own closed captions to actually,
see passed the rose glasses that skews your worldview,
out past curfew brazenly making your way merrily,

down that yellow brick road until you stub your toe I told you,
healing can hurt you if you forget your virtues,
still you choose to refuse the truth shown in your own show,
okay your choice to choose now without further ado, the news,
this just in, we’re all caught in whirlpools,
THH3 48 ∆
drains all clogged with heirlooms,
energy vampires virgule our virtues,
as slashed wrist fill bathtubs, pills lay on pillows in bedrooms,
these cities are pretty venues for gritty citizen cesspools,

sporadic & magic with hearts as dark as our issues,
no Jim Henson only thuggish muppets wretched henchmen,
puzzled puppets & sketchy Skeksis from The Dark Crystal,
it’s a bizarre & awkward Little Shop of Horrors,

a smorgasbord of unordered hors d’oeuvres served cold,
& you’re confused of course because you didn’t order more,
plus it smells horrible oh well it’s only the first course,
anyways what’s on the menu today,

in this Showroom AKA Stolen Souls Salesroom’s display,
Nympho Nephews that resist rescue,
plus a side of drunken Lethargic Legume pate,
in other words intoxicated obnoxious Obscene Family Beans,

that are nostalgic for forgotten things that’ve long gone away,
& what have you on menu #2,

Locobutt Coconuts, crazy nuts Loony Tunes that lack values,
in other words hardheaded tropical crazy assed loons,
animated guys that apply topical gravy acid to cashews,
excuse me, did I offend you is that why you gave your opinion,
well opinions are like assholes & I’m sorry but I didn’t ask you,
THH3 49 ∆
I’ll harass you, if I want to, & harass her ass too,
I’m lampooned, lampin’ on a lagoon in a pontoon,
going gorillas, with my baboons in the full moon,
hope to not get harpooned too soon high as a kite at high noon,
call me Sun, or Sultan,

everyone is overdone, it’s insultin’,
brainwashed, & super spun,
the buzzer buzzed, the dirty laundry’s done,
hang it out to dry in the breeze,

air it out the window for everyone to see,
then look up at the sky, & tell me what you see,
one life at a time out here in San Franpsy, thunder & lightning,
here in San Franpsy, the sky, has a reddish haze,

smoke from Ukraine, magic mushrooms & acid rain,
we have all types of weather here in San Franpsycho,

slash your wrists just to check your vitals,
San Franpsycho, psycho, psy-trance,

that Psy guy, with his Gangnam dance, dance monkey dance,
strung out junkies, self made flunkies,
& 3rd rate rejects with a 2nd chance,
computer programmers,
THH3 50 ∆
digital techno gods,
programming the New World Order,
Zuckerberg & Steve Jobs,
& yeah the equation is way off,
but somehow we’ll even the odds,
even when Silk Road is taken down,

at the public library by out of town Federal Agents,
the caterpillars still make silk from mother’s milk,
still there are celebrations without any occasions,
from Hiroshima to Fukushima,

laughter from the hyphy hellish hyenas,
belly of the Beast sh!tting out diarrhea,
hey anyone have any memories for my ongoing amnesia,
or maybe some anesthesia for this creative creature,
jeez I can barely breath I need to leave but,
I’m disorientated deliriously stumbling around this arena,
where I was just served a subpoena to answer to Jesus,
but I’m not ready to leave just yet, enjoying the scenery bruh,
we’re all portraits portrayed in The Great Life Galleria,
& I’m enjoying the show laughing madly like the hellish hyenas,
tip toeing on eggshells a tipsy bombed out bombshell ballerina,
as if it’s all good ‘cause I haven’t seen a real life Hiroshima,
washing down a divine diva’s cleavage,
with medical marijuana margaritas,
shouting out “Eureka”, struck gold & made a deal with Jesus,
THH3 51 ∆
Christ, or Jackson,
like Mike, or Michael,
The mirrored man is the boogieman, nothing’s normal,
damn, it all goes down in San Franpsycho,
thee end, is coming soon, do what you have to for survival…
They say, thee end’s coming soon,

thought there was more to say,
really though,
how much more can we say?
Lost,
amongst the chaos caught outside with a long way to go,
calm,
within the center inside everything comes 360° full circle,
420 on 4/20, high up on Hippy Hill,

San Franpsycho disco, Golden Gate Jack & Jill,
I pay no mind so I’m never late, I never hate,

I may be the best of the best, either way it’s up for debate,
cold hearted, but I serve hot plates, because, I’ve got weight,
see clever makes, cheddar cakes, I just illuminate, then elevate,
a friendly fellow that never settles,
I’ve been through Hell for Heaven’s sake,
THH3 52 ∆
I hear my echos echo let’s go more petrol,
petal to the metal so I’m never told “That’s the breaks.”,
forever great,
until I seal my own fate,
when I jump from the upper grates,
of the The Golden Gate in the Golden State,
here in San Franpsycho,

our tides rise our earth quakes,
gone so far been Halal & Kosher,
should probably have more to say,
they say,
thee end is coming soon,
though there was more to say,
no marriage & over is the honeymoon,
really though, what more can we say,

lost with a long way to go, gone far far away,
Lost,
amongst the chaos caught outside with a long way to go,
calm,
within the center inside everything comes 360° full circle…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 53 ∆
Sanctuary in LA [13]
“To create is the greatest act of freedom.”

-Maceo Paisley
At a sanctuary in LA,
calm in the center of the chaos,
a place to find some time to rest,
in times when all seems way lost,
in this concrete jungle, this place is like a bed of soft moss,

a place where it’s safe to let my guard down,
hidden from the predators that prowl,
I can relax & restore myself,
water falls from waterfalls,

upon my back,
naked as the day I was born,
body soaking wet,
in this insulated concrete womb in LA,

hidden away deep inside the belly of the Beast,
cradled in the fog of this thick steam,
water temperature’s identical to the body’s heat,
98°F, 37°C,
hot pools froth like mother's milk,
THH3 54 ∆
no windows to the wild stressed out outside world,
allows me to be taken back to calmer times,
when I was just an innocent fetus & mom was just a girl,
bathing naked as the day I was born,
no Bathing Ape though no disrespect towards Pharrell,
bare as a birthed infant when first emerged,
nude in my truth,
nothing can hide here,
the sanctuary provides here,
a place for reflection, remove your clothes, remove your fears,
find yourself here.
At a sanctuary in LA,
in times when all seems way lost.
I’d arrived only hours earlier into LA,

fresh of the plane, from an overseas flight,
flew in from another country, you know what they say,
another dollar another day, safe to say it’d been a long night,
it’d had been a long night, it’d been a long day,

it’s been a long life, in more than one way,
THH3 55 ∆
but the risk of distraction,
keeps me far enough away from reminiscing,
on moments from the past that have happened,
at least while I’m living here in the present to go back to them,
so I stay in the now & reinstate my vows within these walls,
of hot water, rising steam, & sagging cement,
I relax & descend until content…
Immersed in clay, immersed in salt,

immersed as a way to wash off the hurt that’s felt,
from an unobserved thirst that’s been overworked to a fault,
along with washing off everything else,
sitting suitably unreserved in the zone at the Korean spa,
under served, & over looked, undeterred, & never shook,
unreserved, conscious & unlearned,

first submerge to reverse the hurt of the curse,
then once the rites have served the purpose of rebirth,
fully purged, return, resurface, & re-emerge,
immersed in clay & salt, forgive yourself,

first of all it’s not your fault at all, for sure,
so forgive yourself heal your cells, let go,
hit the spa sip some spring water, & purge,
THH3 56 ∆
derobe,
shower,
sauna,
shower,
steam room,
shower,
hot pool,
cold plunge,
repeat,
toxicify, cleanse, give, receive,
& yes I’m a Skeptic,

but I’m a skeptic that believes,
so that makes me a Believer,
& you’d be a believer too if you’d seen the things I’ve seen,
see,
I’d arrived only hours earlier into LA,

fresh of the plane, from an overseas flight,
flew in from another country, you know what they say,
another dollar another day, safe to say it’d been a long night,
it was now Sunday afternoon, my rebirth was complete,

in a post steam sweat soak sit I heard someone call,
“Aaron.”, from across the dressing room to me,
THH3 57 ∆
I turned to see a fellow poet standing tall,
on the other side of the room as nude as me,
even though he had clothes on & I wasn’t wearing a thing,
it’s the soul not the body that truly exposes what we think,
so in a way he was as nude as the year before his 1st birthday,
& all of these thoughts,

came to me as I saw him,
beads of aqua still resting on the tips,
of his tightly curled Jesus black hair of carbon,
resting upon a brilliant mind within this brilliant madness,

that contains the brain of someone who’s truly a genius,
we talked for a few moment then I asked this,

“Do you want a ride?”,
seeing the skinny skateboard in his hands,
I thought he would accept but instead he declined,
“No thanks, I’m meeting a girl here we’re walking.”,

& with that it seemed like we were done talking,
it was Sunday the day of rest,

I wish my thoughts believed in that,
but my mind continues to contemplate moments of life,
that never allow mental rest, my psychology has no Sabbath,
but I do have confessions & I do confess this,
THH3 58 ∆
maybe if I wasn’t white I wouldn’t be driving this white Benz,
a white man in a white Mercedes how cliche,
maybe if I was a few tones darker I’d have no extra to spend,
maybe,
the reason I don’t think racism affects me,
is because I’ve been not so quietly reaping it’s benefits,
passively implicit in this covered up discriminant conspiracy,
so maybe I shield my eyes,

even if it’s only done subconsciously,
& when I hear of the cops taking another black life,
maybe I think well that doesn’t really affect me directly,
even though it does actually effect me directly,

every black guy I know has been harassed by cops harshly,
still I just go about my day,

& try to not let these injustices worry me,
even though deep down I know,
that I’m not safe from the cops & quotas they crave to meet,
nor will I ever be as long as the prison system is privatized,
because the Prison Industrial Complex is real, it’s scary,
it’s in no way a conspiracy, it’s literally a for profit industry,
it’s not ran by “we the people”, it’s ran by private companies,
somehow they get public servants to help out their numbers,
& a lot of these cops & lawyers are liars & thieves,
so I know the slogan “to protect & to serve” really means,
THH3 59 ∆
it mean cops only protect their own, it’s basic human instinct,
& I’m disturbed by this explicit sh!t which I’m implicit in,
still I try not to beef with it even though I’m from “the streets”,
because the color of my skin allows me certain privileges,
that I’m too ignorant or rather too selfish to willing see,
caught in a state of Collective Cognitive Dissonance,
this system has always been discriminant,

but there's hope because change is not only the only constant,
it’s also imminent & great moments of greatness,
happen in carefully planned spontaneous instances,
as was the case on that Sunday in LA,

where seeing a brother from another mother helped me awake,
made me a bit more woke even though it was only a brief hello,
& goodbye before we both walked away,
at that sanctuary in LA,

in times when all seems way lost,
find yourself,
here.
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 60 ∆
Saturday Night Fever [14]
Going overtime, how much is too much,

everything has it’s price, how much to touch,
totally out of control, buying souls to remotely control,
ego so numb that we often go dumb, then go in too rough,
after blacking out, we carry on is it wrong nobody knows,
but what’s certainly for sure is it sure is such a rush,
an intoxicating concoction of different addictions,

sniffin’ depressants & stimulants mixed in inhalants bumped,
in an attempt to defeat depression we get in a session,
of pheromones amplified with hallucinogens & other stuff,
such as digesting dissociatives with casual associates,
getting open & over dosin’ on opioids smoking cannabis puffs,
colorful characters getting acquainted while getting buzzed,

sure the weed is loud but we don’t gossip much,
mention once you slept with that celebrity & you’re cut,
out the scene so nobody says who did who or who did what,
no one ever mentions that so & so did such & such,
it’s inappropriate to disclose things that are inappropriate,
no we don’t kiss & tell, so when we show up, keep it hush,
blow some kisses to the wishing well hope we never grow up,
this isn’t show & tell, take your oath, draw your blood,
& keep what goes on under covers covered up no matter what,
what is up, nothing is forever, what the fck,
so we’re trying to do & feel some good before our time is up,
THH3 61 ∆
before the icebergs melt, the oceans flood,
& the whole Earth dries up,
no one knows where this wild ride will go,
so we’re donating time & donating funds to NGO’s,

trying to do some good before we have to go,
while at the same time having a good time,
that’s why we’re high on white dancing like it’s a 70’s disco,
living every day like it’s the last day of our lives,
dancing like John Travolta on cola no controlla on a pole,
& we’ve caught Saturday Night Fever, temperature’s so high,
completely in the zone & totally out of control,
going feral like Will Ferrell on the last Saturday Night Live,
after tonight no one knows where this wild ride will go,
& that’s why we’re going overtime, no amount is too much,

everything has it’s price, how much to touch,
totally out of control, buying souls to remotely control,
ego so numb that we often go dumb, then go in too rough,
after blacking out, we carry on is it wrong nobody knows,
but what’s certainly for sure is it sure is such a rush…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 62 ∆
Scarlet The Armored Harlot [15]
Red eyes no bullseye high off our mark,

distracted by addictions it’s apparent from our scars,
scars etched, it gets, intense,

when with, an armed, harlot,
such as, Scarlet, all in,
don’t know, where the, day went,
time ticks, the plot, thickens,

as our, instincts, persist,
it gets, real deep, real quick,
in bed, in this, instant,
quite lit, just like, incense,

it gets, hard to, resist,
too much, to take, feel sick,
so I, dip out, no sex,
escape, with a, quickness, I get, gone with, the wind,
too intense for my presence I escape outside & get in a tent,

I camp outside, to lamp out wide, without pride, at my expense,
they say there’s nothing free in this life, even time is spent,
but outside, at least I can breath, & be free of any ill intent.
See she says if we have sex she’ll feel guilty & regret it,
THH3 63 ∆
I don’t want to be one of her regrets, so I get gone to prevent it,
apparently she associates sex with trauma from her past,
& I don’t want to open old wounds because I’m sensitive,
still my sentiment makes me ask this,

since when, did our past begin to define us,
when it’s always been our present destiny that we manifest,
I don’t know I guess sometimes we forget & have to remind us,
that we angels albeit fallen & all of us are Heaven sent,
& sometimes only moments like this are where we truly find us,
that scent, on your skin, mixes with the wind,

sending signals, to my brain, to release serotonin,
sea breeze, coconut trees, please jeez I’m on my knees,
I’m ready, & willing to start when you are, just say when,
still, my sentiment makes me ask this,

since when, since were names so inappropriate,
Scarlet’s a darling sure, but far from a harlot that’s my word,
so far that actually she abstains, resisting like a soviet,
since when,
were you so absent from class that,
you forgot the basic fact that,
all women are divine even when abstinent,
honestly I’d rather be,

laying in this hammock with a Goddess that’s abstinent,
THH3 64 ∆
than rubbing while clubbing,
getting used by a drunken slut that will soon be a has been,
a has been that can’t get a reaction not even a fraction,
nope I want a genuine artist, not a bad act with bad actin’,
I want laughter I want rushes,

I want her because with her all of that comes in bunches,
her inner instinct is distinct,
& is much more than just what a hunch is,
a hunger for wonder, what’s for lunch kid?
Let’s have a picnic this instant & then get down to business,
actually let’s scrap the deal & forget all about business,
let’s get up let’s rise like the tides & ride like the winds,
let’s make some magic & let God be our witness,
we’re in this, no limits, no gimmicks, no scrimmage,
no cynics, no stupids, no skeptics, no septic, no sewage,
no sadness, no losers, no handcuffs, so tragic, the truth is,
that abusers, abuse but, their tactics, are average,
so when, they attempt it, we just shut down, that madness,
make them, step back, back track, & send them packin’,
& once they realize what’s happened,
they retract & shoot back with,
“I’m so sorry, jeez, please accept my apologies,

I didn’t mean, to try to take all of your Light Energy!”,
ok we hear them plead, but don’t accept their pleases,
THH3 65 ∆
we tell these fickle fleas, “I think it’s time for you all to flee!”,
peace, & their gone, along with the whispers in the wind,
& we’re in the hammock again,
Scarlet & I still off our mark & still high as ever,
gone like the wind our world continues to spin,
distracted by our addictions which is apparent,
from the scars we’re wearin’ in the body we’re currently in,
with red eyes, no bullseyes, no bullsh!t, just straight facts,

think about the best thing you could ever do in your life,
& rest assured we’ve been there & done that,
all true in all ways in other words this’s all correct,
from Venus to Mars with,

a darling named Scarlet,
she leaves an imprint on my soul,
though with no crayon nor marker, she uses her armor,
no mark, no start, no finish,

no gimmicks, just livin’ this life we live that we live to the limit,
with words that are true in all ways in other words all fact,
we progress in order to obtain a peaceful coexistence,
Vague,
yet exact,
we rush forward,
then step back,
THH3 66 ∆
heartbeats & feelings,
all part of our Reel Life Living soundtrack,
& no I didn’t misspell that,
I spelled it Reel Life because it’s like a movie with no script,
acting sans script holy like Sanskrit living it up until it’s a wrap,
as sounds rap upon the windows of my soul,
in the form of the flicker in her eyes from the candlelight,
which is a response to & reflection of the moon’s glow,
& it is then that I know,
she is a magical creature that I could write about on pages,

for ages to have her mysteries deciphered by future sages,
but then I feel her beauty is so pure,
that I don’t even wish to display it on literary stages,
so I just stop writing,

& give one last look at her by candlelight,
I give thanks for her in this moment of abstinence,
then leave her alone, finish my rhyme & go outside,
into the tropical moon night, I escape outside & get in a tent,
I camp outside, to lamp out wide, without pride, at my expense,
they say there’s nothing free in this life, even time is spent,
but outside, at least I can breath, & be free of any ill intent…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 67 ∆
Screen Crack [16]
Jesus!
What the fck,

wait, Jesus, has nothing to do with this,
your hands glued to the latest PDA device,

hands glued along with your eyes,
seems you cling to your PDA for dear life,
like it’s as important as a TAH, what’s a TAH look it up,
it’s a Total Artificial Heart,

you are the “art” in artificial,
since when did Personal Displays of Affection PDAs,
get replaced with Personal Digital Assistants,
no way phones could be the new PDAs I can’t accept that,

oh well I guess it’s the perfect sign of the times,
people used to show affection & kiss in public,
now they don’t even notice & the only kisses given are emojis,
no romance they don’t even hold hands show love or show up,
would rather masturbate in silence than deal with this,

& maybe that makes me part of the problem,
see I could go out & try to socialize but I stay inside instead,
& don’t even mind ‘cause most people aren’t worth the stress,
THH3 68 ∆
plus it’s been so long since I’ve been in a relationship,
if I met someone I wouldn’t even know what to say anyways,
we replaced Empathy with Apathy eye contact with iPhones,
now we’re all bored Cyborgs & alienated Androids,
we keep avoiding each other instead of enjoying each other,

we keep assuming we are annoying each other,
which prevents us from successfully joining each other,
so we effectively self isolate ourselves from one another,
one step closer to an Anti-Social New World Order New Age,

every time we become afraid & walk away instead of engage,
would rather scatter than talk to someone,

in a way that could be construed as rude,
so we just walk-on & ignore every single someone,
even though one of those someones is you,
in the Narcissistic Network of this Sociopathic Society,

where the only certainty is that this cycle of denial is psycho,
what the fck, totally stuck, mind fckt & sucked,
into that lil cancer causing PDA your hot little hands hold,
Steve Jobs got cancer,

you think that’s a random freakin’ coincidence,
people that work with electronic devices their whole lives,
get sick & this is not just a few examples of isolated incidents,
THH3 69 ∆
it’s not a rumor that consumers get tumors from electronics,
even Stevie Wonder could see how Stevie Jobs got sick,
died in his mid 50’s alone & in bed thin as a stick,
all those billions couldn’t save him,

so what makes you think you’ll survive,
why should I care how you live if you don’t care how you die,
think you’re saving time on that portable electronic device,
but you’re living a lie wasting your life not saving your time,
because no one ever regrets spending less on screen time,
but people often regret not spending more time,
in nature attention undivided with loved ones by their side,
before they die, going to do you a favor, save you the trouble,
of spending your whole life chasing things on a digital screen,
I’m going to quote Steve Jobs’s last words here,
so you can start making changes now before it’s too late.
“I have come to the pinnacle of success in business.

In the eyes of others, my life has been the symbol of success.
However, apart from work, I have little joy. Finally, my wealth
is simply a fact to which I am accustomed.
At this time, lying on the hospital bed & remembering all my
life, I realize all the accolades & riches of which I was once so
proud, have become insignificant with my imminent death.
In the dark, when I look at the green lights, of the equipment for
artificial respiration, feel the buzz of their mechanical sounds,
I can feel the breath of my approaching death looming over me.
THH3 70 ∆
Only now do I understand that once you accumulate enough
money for the rest of your life, you have to pursue objectives
that are not related to wealth.
It should be something more important:
For example, stories of love, art, dreams of my childhood.
No, stop pursuing wealth, it can only make a person into a
twisted being, just like me.”…
See, now you’ve heard it directly from a genius,

so there you go don’t say I didn’t tell you so,
still you hear the final words of a brilliant billionaire,
& instead if take his advice you say “Who cares?”,
& that is actually a serious question, who cares?
Probably not me or you so why would we heed a warning,

no matter how wise the words were that were wrote,
we’re too busy trying to find fake treasures on Pokemon Go,
or read the latest news or scroll the latest posts,
seems all those Apples & Androids, have made us apathetic,

bit the forbidden fruit, in The Garden of Electronic Eden,
porn streaming has replaced actual sex, it takes less effort,
exchanged intimacy for IoT, replaced sex with EMFs,
no intercourse just internet no farmer’s markets on weekdays,

just products on eBay & freebased sympathy that’s synthetic,
so we don’t feel the vibration of our brothers & sisters,
THH3 71 ∆
we just feel the vibration of our phones in our pocket,
we don’t notice the signs of our civilization in decline,
we just notice our phone’s notifications when they go off,
see the more connected we become to the virtual world,

the less connected we become to the actual world,
& I’m having a melt down,

witnessing everyone on their cell phones,
& I want to find a reason to believe in a real person to love,
but I feel like hope is gone & we’re all just lost without a home,
& I’m just as guilty as the rest of us,
‘cause I’m often also lost in the zone on my phone like a drone,
& I’m not religious but maybe we really do need Jesus,

maybe I really do need Jesus,
what the fck, wait,
Jesus, has nothing to do with this,
a whole new generation of users has been created,

through the use of new additions of cell phones & laptops,
& some of the users are as young as 8 years old,
computers are the new & improved evolution of crack rock,
but family’s are so used to their kids using that they just shrug,
even though their kids are so addicted that they can’t stop,
some even enable kid’s addiction by buying them new editions,
THH3 72 ∆
cracked screens from dropping your phone,
gives you a minor heart attack,
oh how attractive cancer seems when it’s attractively wrapped,
in the form of an impersonal personalized phone case artifact,
Silver, Gold or Grey, SnapChat is the new black.
What the fck, hands glued to the latest PDA device,

like it’s as important as a TAH, what’s a TAH, look it up,
look up look up,

you are alive in a body on these beautiful lands,
mathematically a 1 in 400 trillion chance of being born,
you’re literally the most amazing miracle you could ever have!
There’s a whole world out there,

please find someone to get to know & love,
because there’s probably someone right next to you right now,
that’s willing to give you their all & it’s obvious,
all you have to do to see is set down your phone & look up!
If you’d only just look up!
But, you’re too busy playing Pokemon Go to notice love,
I know, we’re part of a 1st World society,
THH3 73 ∆
& we all play our part by being passively compliant,
in order to be an accessory to our country’s atrocities,
so we get dressed up with the latest techno accessories,
I know,
you don’t want to think about it too much,
because then you might feel guilty, so you stay out of touch,
keeping your head down like you’re mourning a lost love,
there’s an actual psychological condition for this,
Cognitive Dissonance is what it’s called,
so you stay on your phone, not wanting to get involved,

because it’s easier to simply not feel,
won’t even make eye contact just want to be left alone,
because you’re conditioned to fear anything that’s real,
insecure & scared of the unknown you cling to your phone,
even though,
it’s the things we’re most comfortable with that usually kill us,
cars cigarettes alcohol cell phones,
I’m telling you addiction to technology is a serious illness,
as we begin to decay into a mediated medicated mental illness.
Do you even remember,

what you did on your phone yesterday,
do you even remember,
THH3 74 ∆
what you did with your emotions yesterday,
when the last time was you felt real emotions,
the last time you did anything to help the world?
What is there left to believe in when nothing feels right?
Feels like,
we are losing touch with everything that makes us human,
emotions experienced in artistic expressions are leaving,
we have no attention span & cyborg robots do most thinking,
as we steadily slip into an artificial abyss remember this,
I Love You,
& it scares you when I tell you,

like all real emotions scare you,
& then I tell you I want to take that phone you hold,
& throw it into the ocean,
& you finally look up from your phone after all this time,
stare me in the eyes glare & say, “How dare you!”,
like you’re defending your phone,
as if it’s a part of your very existence you were born with,
like you’d hate a fellow animated human,
for destroying an inanimate object, that’s the Devil’s trick,
because when we’ve lost all emotions only hatred lingers,
THH3 75 ∆
desperate I’ll take hatred over nothing if that’s all that’s left,
& I’m the biggest hypocrite of all,

because I say all this about technology,
but here I am writing these words on this laptop,
& offering advice but not offering apologies,
maybe I’ll really realize someday,

when someone shakes me & wakes me from my digital daze,
either that or when I’m all alone about to go home in the sky,
on that death bed quoting the last words of Steve Jobs,
“Stop pursuing wealth, it can only make a person into a twisted

being, just like me…”,
Wow.
Can you hear me now?
No you probably still don’t hear me,

because you’re likely on your phone reading this right now,
your hands glued to the latest PDA device,

like it’s as important as a TAH, what’s a TAH look it up…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 76 ∆
Screws Loose [17]
No rules,
so anything goes,
got a few screws loose,
I often lose control but somehow I never lose,
no rules,
so anything goes,
I often double down but somehow I never fold,
no rules,
so anything goes,
when with me we have our own world,
so you can assume the identity of anyone you choose,
no rules,
pheromones, coffee & cocaine, at midnight,
killing common sense, just to feel alive, & live life,
but in my defense, I’m not having kids, I’m not a common guy,
& all that averageness, well I’m not having it,

I’m a picnic, that’s missing some sandwiches,
driving high with one headlight in a Hyundai with bad handling,
one hand out the window with one finger to The Establishment,
had it together Once Upon a Time In Hollywood,
THH3 77 ∆
then lost my mind like Brad Pitt, not exactly sure where it went,
got a few screws loose, yet still manage to handle stuff,

plus the fact that my head is too loose is taken advantage of,
by some thoughts inside that’re about to make their escape,
subtracting erratic additives & adding eccentric adjectives up,
wish to stay organized, even had a list in order to prioritize,

but lost the list & forgot whatever it was that was on it,
& with this we carry on where we left of to where are we goin’,

it’s a gift to both celebrate & at the same time mourn,
at Sayers with other players there are layers on layers,
we’re on one & we’re not coming home ‘till 6 in the morn,
ignore the rumors from the Truthers they’re useless,

the truth is when we exit the club the cubs run up to swarm,
because it’s a cold world & they just want to stay warm,
but I don’t want none of it about to throw up sick of the porn,
need a medic, yep I said it, something’s inherently wrong,
feeling Marvin Gaye, but I think I’m straight, What’s Going On,
everyone & everything’s uncut & unedited,

still it’s undoubtedly full steam ahead no sedatives,
don’t know who said what or why they said what they did,
but I don’t care either way anymore what so & so did,
because I’ve got no fcks left to give so I don’t give a sh!t,
told you before everything is uncut & unedited, including this,
THH3 78 ∆
no cares, no fcks, no rules, so what, know what,
I don’t know much but I do know you fcks are too screwed.
Lost my marbles, got girls by the car full, no loose nuts,

plus, I’m too fresh to rust, but still got a few screws loose,
not a Screwed Pooch, Pooped Pooh, or Scrooge McDuck,
priceless, as Rothschild’s Faberge Egg, I’m The Golden Goose,
I give love & give it up but don’t give up or lose,

not a cop or the man, but I am The Man as in That Dude,
& I play the Game yeah, but I don’t play by the rules,
so I don’t have to choose, between engine & caboose,
I’ll take the whole kit & caboodle sippin’ on gin & juice,
trippin’ on cid & sherm no perm, shout out to Snoop,
your boy’s out his noodle, marinara with olives & shrooms,
getting it all in all the time still I have time to show gratitude,
in a New York State of Mind with a happening aptitude,
half reckless half recluse with a nothing to lose attitude,
& I know it all looks outta control but don’t be fooled,
we’re the truth & we’ve got this whole game glued,
no rules,
so anything goes,
I often lose control but somehow I never lose…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 79 ∆
Sexual Healing [18]
She cries during sex,

in an attempt to express & address,
this set of collective regrets that’ve been suppressed,
ever since when she was first undressed & no one confessed,
I let her vent, give her room & hold space so she can process,
I suggest she take some deep breaths instead of stress,

still has some emotions left so I guess in a sense she’s blessed,
in a world that’s gone cold & everyone seems possessed,
people stumbling around like zombies in The Walking Dead,
no Norman Reedus or Andrew Lincoln features though,

just an aborted fetus & a broken heart seeking treatment,
which explains why she’s always willing to give guys a try,
& stay with them faithfully even when she’s mistreated,
& I’m willing to be crucified for the actions of other guys,
so I take her torment away & transform it like Jesus,
bare the weight of her loss like a cross then write the moments,
releasing the feelings in books since I’m a poet not a preacher,
not here for the heroics,

or other crowning moments or admirable achievements either,
so I’m on the down-low drinking hoping to go unnoticed,
at a bar on a barstool with a babe so hot I’ve got a fever,
we’re both discrete because we both need sexual healing,
THH3 80 ∆
& I promise her I’ll be here for her & not leave her,
until I get assassinated like Abe Lincoln at a theatre,
but she doesn’t believe the things I say about loyalty,

because she’s been betrayed before so she’s not too eager,
but hey I can’t blame her if I’d been through what she has,
I probably wouldn’t be eager to believe me either,
pause this’s getting too intense it’s time for an intermission,
I need to take a break so I can take a breather,
in a real life Soap Opera drama live on stage in Life’s theatre,

caught up in all the rawness of these women’s feelings,
one minute she’s laughing the next minute she’s crying,
she apologizes & I say she never has to apologize for feeling,
or make excuses to me or anyone else for her feelings,

I mean at least she still feels things,
even when those feelings open wounds that need healing,

lays her head one my shoulder, says she’s been raped before,
so when I go rough in the sack with her she gets flashbacks,
& it’s hard to face facts that relate to what’s happened before,
I tell her it’s okay I tell her I’ll go slow we can take our time,
I tell her it’s ok to stay she’s safe, she can tell me anything,
I tell her sometimes it helps to open up & communicate,
but she just clams up & doesn’t say a thing,
THH3 81 ∆
so I get up to go shower,
to try & wash off the stress,
moments later she comes in & joins me,
somewhere between sedated & upset,
at a hotel somewhere in America,

a hotel they call boutique,
but it all feels haunted & a bit spooky if you ask me,
the wind howls, the windows rattle, & all the floors creak,
so I can’t help but get the creeps,

because this hotel feels more than just a little like me,
all dressed up nice, hip trendy on the outside,
but inside everything’s not at all what it seems,
haunted from the drama of these girls that were abused,

then used sex to transfer that abusive dark energy onto me,
which I guess I kinda deserve because I used to serve,
this sort of abuse to girls who were into me sexually,
you get what you give this is exactly what karma is,
so now I’m trying to help heal the Collective Feminine,
from all the damage that’s been previously done over lifetimes,
by the overly aggressive actions of the Collective Masculine,
so go ahead smash your conflicts into me I’m begging you,

drown me in the ocean of the tears of your traumas,
THH3 82 ∆
scream shout let it all out until there’s nothing left to let go of,
& I will still love you continually no menopause or commas,
I will always love you unconditionally continually,

no mental pauses or parental dramas,
you have been hurt before but you still have worth for sure,
no one’s pure but at least you’re honest & willing to work on it,
& it’s an honor to be here to hear & be your platform,

for you to express your regrets until there’s nothing left,
you are an incredible creation resilient & brilliant,
you’re worth it we’re out here when distressed I’ll be your outlet
so you can vent the stress as you process,

even if part of that process involves crying during sex,
you’re worth it I’m here to hear everything you express,
a Living Light in this world of The Walking Dead,
so it’s totally okay to cry during sex go ahead,

especially if it’s an attempt to express & address,
the set of collective regrets that’ve you’ve suppressed,
ever since you were first undressed & no one confessed,
I’ll let you vent give you room

& hold space so you can process…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 83 ∆
She Shares Her Happiness [19]
Her head's in the clouds,

feet firmly planted on solid ground,
she's a walking paradox in all her honestness,
she's light she's sound she’s outta her mind she’s outta bounds,
she’s so much more than these words could ever explore,
& yes she’s exactly as crazy as that last sentence sounds,
a real live wire, an uncontrollable wild fire,

chaos in her reflections she doesn't ask for directions,
as the madness defeats the sadness in her eyes of sapphire,
as I sit back, admire the fire that burns inside her,
the table turns, she becomes the writer writing the realization,
that wishing’s never gotten anyone anywhere,
& she shares at me intently & I listen,
even though I’ll staring ambivalently at the stairs,
because my body is here but my mind is elsewhere,
distracted by the fact that the public’s judgements are unfair,
fully aware of the Cons & their accompanying glares,
& the comments they make when they compare,
& it’s not fair but they’re just pawns so you shouldn’t care,
Queens shouldn’t concern themselves with Pawns’ affairs,
because at the corner of compassion & detachment,
sits conflict along with complications so it’s best to not care,
best to stay away but also at the same time stay aware,
& I don’t care because right now she’s happy,
THH3 84 ∆
it’s a new dawn & there’s a new vibe in the fresh air,
almost time to go so let me say one thing while we’re still here,
“Hello there, thank you for your caring enough to share,

remember, take care, good luck, goodbye, be safe & beware.”,
“ But before we go let’s just be here, as enemies or friends,

choose either or both, just don't choose to pretend.”,
& then I thank her for all she’s shared,

while still staring ambivalently at the stairs,
& although there are times I wish I was anywhere but here,
in this moment with her I don’t wish to be anywhere but here,
as I realize the only place wishing’s ever got me was here,
here in this moment I’m happy with you,

because you’re happy too as crazy as that sounds,
your head in the clouds,
your feet firmly planted on solid ground,
you’re a walking paradox in all your honestness,
you’re light you’re sound outta your mind & outta bounds,
you’re so much more than these words could ever explore,
& yes you’re exactly as crazy as that last sentence sounds,
to you from me, forever yours, at least this time around…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 85 ∆
Sick of Being Sick, Tired of Being Tired [20]
Sick of being sick,

tired of being tired,
looking for someone to help fill this hole in my heart,
it’s a dirty job but the position’s open if you want it you’re hired,
feeling overly emo texting in emojis,

expressing myself fully shouting out loud shout out to Syre,
can’t harm me ready to raise a Pink Army shout out to Erys,
part Jaden part Raiden part TruthTeller part Liar,
a Talented Antonym part Kid on The Bed part Boogeyman,
part Gandhi PeaceMaker part Sicario Hitman For Hire,
part “Let’s just be the best of friends till the bitter end.”,
part “Let’s make crazy love until we fulfill our sexual desires.”,
part retarded Stupid Player saying to you, “Goodbye forever”,

part prophetic Soothsayer saying to you, “See you later.”,
feeling low & disconnected, at the same time high & wired,
sometimes I don’t want to get out of bed, but I’m still inspired,
wish I could reach out & hold you with this words,
wish I could but what’s a wish other than a passive desire,
Wishing You Were Here filling the void like Pink Floyd,
I’ve been taking hits from both sides like Floyd Mayweather,
but somehow I’ve managed to survive & emerge victorious,
mixing ambition with resolve gets problems solved way better,
THH3 86 ∆
don’t need your help I do it myself, so I owe no favors,
driving in the fast lane now, because there’s no later,
a Professional Purveyor, of Flavors to Savor,
an Against All Odds Prevailer, a Stormy Sea Sailor,
who flew under the radar unannounced on a wing & a prayer,
had a couple of drinks then bounced the heck back outta there
“Mirror mirror on the wall who’s the fairest of them all?”,

if truth be told I don’t care they can’t compare us at all,
“Genie in the lamp please grant me 3 wishes.”,

“The 1st is give me the energy to match my ambitions,
the 2nd is allow me the clarity to clearly see all my Visions
& 3rd make sure someone hurt receives the next 3 wishes.”,
because I’m not the only one that deserves,

to be cured of this wicked sickness.
Sick of being sick,

tired of being tired,
looking for someone to help fill this hole in my heart,
it’s a dirty job but the position’s open if you want it you’re hired.
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 87 ∆
Sigur Ros [21]
Everyone's looking for a savior,

some one to lift them out of the hole they've dug,
if only they were a little bit braver,
maybe then they'd find the love,
maybe it’s as easy as coming out & speaking up,
maybe then we could give love instead of giving up,
but we’re scared as fck, so we don’t step up,
for sure we’re all insecure, in these dangerous seas,

unsure if people are insincere, or if they say what they mean,
we’re surely not in church, still we’re often found on our knees,
oh no hun none of us are pure, for sure we all are diseased,
so we wear all black as if we're at a funeral mourning,
the death of all that that we once held sacred,
& everything’s moving to fast to pace it,
feeling like everything’s deceasing & we can’t help or shake it,
need a break but time doesn’t miss a beat world keeps turning,
through all this blessed sacred love & undressed naked hatred,
the material witness to our own destruction,

we scream relentless into our own deaf ears it’s pointless,
pleading to you in despair to please just show me something,
other than these same old recycled fears & disappointments,
show me that you are alive, you’re humanized & you still feel,
THH3 88 ∆
take the time to look past my cuts & scars to see I too still feel
I too have been hurt, yeah they hurt #metoo, but I too will heal,
I too have layers to peel, I too am still real, I too am still here.
I’m Still Here like Ben Stiller,

feeling outta place as ever like a smoking Joaquin,
being interviewed by David Letterman unscripted on live TV,
having an identity crisis like a right-wing drag queen,
scratching my beard acting weird ignoring what they’re asking
I grew a beard & it got weird, mourning my brother’s passing,
not going to cry you a River, still have some compassion,
an overdose is not a joke it’s always a shock when it happens,
still after all the pain I rise like a Phoenix as the smoke clears,
& after all the chaos is finished, out of the ashes I’m still here.
Here,
here, you are, here, we are,
shooting stars, through the pitch black sky,
lost in your own eyes, lost in our own lies, you seem so far,
wish I could explain it better, with more than just words I find,
can’t hide it, deny it, or describe it, every definition is defied,
that’s why I don’t even try I just get high enough to get by,
so I guess it’s whatever, oh well forget it, Nevermind,
Smells Like Teen Spirit Cobain we’re all in pain & insane,
we’re all running outta of patience & running out of time,
THH3 89 ∆
like Houdini,
suspended upside down,
restrained by chains in a glass box filled with water,
trying to defeat all odds & somehow make it out,
or actually more accurately like David Blaine,
because we magically act so casual, with the pain we contain,
like ships passing in the night, in stormy seas with wind & rain,
life’s a trip, a paradox, we fly outta sight without a plane,
& I know things seem outta control, in these unfriendly skies,

but don’t worry old soul everything’s gonna be alright,
yeah I know we missed each other before,
but we’re not going to miss each other this time,
still it’s difficult to let go, so we dig up the buried bones,

that were left in shallow graves from past relationships,
long gone but not forgotten we dig them up under the full moon,
like a despaired gravedigger or a passing pirate ship,
but seek solace young desperado,

in knowing you’re not the only lonely soul hoping for love,
see everyone's looking for a savior,
some one to lift them out of the hole they've dug,
if only they were a little bit braver,
maybe then they'd find the love,
maybe it’s as easy as coming out & speaking up,
maybe then we could give love instead of giving up…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 90 ∆
Skeleton Keys (Adaptation of Koto Song) [22]
You’re so attractive in your sadness,

I’m so attracted to your despair,
your detachment leads to my enchantment,
it’s madness how in love I am with how little you care,
don’t take your sadness for granted your blackness is magic,
a magnet that makes sense never met a black heart so pure,
lights go out some things only come to light in the darkness,
so close the door open me slow with Skeleton Keys I’m yours,
utterly intoxicated with your darkness dizzy fuzzy numb elated

lost in your smokey jazz notes enthralled in your ensemble,
in a constant state of consistently lucid conscious slumber,
asleep awake dead & alive as the trumpet triumphantly strolls
those Skeleton Keys offer everything except apologies,

can open any closed door in the house,
a radical adaptation of the Koto Song not right nor wrong,
rehearsed repeatedly then spontaneously performed out loud,
only the lonely sound of beautiful music keeps me company,
only the reminiscent present of presence presented presently,
represented by temporary residents who hold skeleton keys,
as that violent violin plays along alluringly,
moving more enticingly than two Barenaked Ladies,
leading us to dance with the Devil wearing two bare left feet,
as skeleton keys play seductively sedative synthetic melodies,
we groove to the music, get into it & move with the beat,
THH3 91 ∆
violent violins & seductive melodies played on skeleton keys,
carried across this dimly lit lounge on nonchalant notes,
upon vibes thick as cigar smoke, we hide in the shadows,
because though our work is famous we'd rather be unknown,
shown only in poem we let our words speak for themselves,
heard only in melody we let our songs sing for themselves,
felt in the crescendo that builds up like ice then melts,
this is Dark Jazz which is all that is as well as nothing else,
there are no rules here everything’s hidden nothing’s exposed,

no pre-show no quotes no encore no secrets disclosed,
moods described in tones express the only emotions shown,
along with the steady progression of ascension in notes,
hopeless undertones make for such potent mix,

when mixed with blissful overtones,
which might explain why you’re so attractive in your sadness,

I’m so attracted to your despair,
your detachment leads to my enchantment,
it’s madness how in love I am with how little you care,
don’t take your sadness for granted your blackness is magic,
a magnet that makes sense never met a black heart so pure,
lights go out some things only come to light in the darkness,
so close the door open me slow with Skeleton Keys I’m yours…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 92 ∆
Slipping [23]
Feeling sorta sick,

held on firm at first took only a second to quickly lost my grip,
disorientated getting dizzy with the spins on this slippery deck,
no exit off this ship lost my way & my balance starting to slip,
the plot’s starting to twist resolve’s starting to give,

woke up in confusion & have been in delusion ever since,
the riddle’s not solved at all what kind of storm are we in,
what’s going on what memo didn’t I get,
& how’d I get involved at all ending up in the middle of all this?
Out in the cold looking for something or someone to hold,

trying to stand my ground while standing on shaky ground,
on quaking earth as the earth turns I search for solid ground,
all heard in a surround sound of loud shapes & fuzzy sounds,
in a full house with four Aces still I feel like I want to fold,
froze in indecision with blurry visions as insecurities take hold,
it’s getting crowded the walls are starting to inwardly close,
thinking out loud in this Full House gone as John Stamos,
driving on GHB, edgy as Jodie Sweetin on amphetamines,
odd as Bob Saget, get off me you f@ggot you’re too close,
conflicted as Mary-Kate Olsen’s guilty conscience is,
after her suspicious involvement in Heath Ledger’s overdose,
THH3 93 ∆
told you before most important secrets will never be known,
finish your main course revenge is a dish best served cold,
but bulletproof coffee is best served hot with no grounds,
the truth is too abstruse at least for most to figure out,
to tell it straight I’m Bossy like Kelis & it’s bout to go down,
can’t hear you when you come ‘round my thoughts’re too loud,
too high so high eyes low head lost in the clouds,
found in the sounds,

between, heart beats & deep breaths,
between, surface heat & deep depths,
between, making sweet love & having really rough sex,
between, historical passed things & what comes next,
suffix,
Ms., Mrs.,
Mr., Dr.,
Sr., Jr.,
thought you were making progress but that was just a rumor,
thought you were an innovator but I guess just a consumer,
still on the seashore hear the wake up call like roosters,
sands erode plans implode bombs explode it’s all bloopers,
dropped the ball found your boat landed back where you were,
THH3 94 ∆
& all these contradictions are creating the perfect storm.
Where were we before we were contained & conformed?

Why do all the picture perfect people seem so deformed?
When were we reborn reformed as The New Norm?
What led us to be stripped of our dignity & clothed in uniform?
Will we realize the American Dream was reborn stillborn,

it’s a tragedy still we don’t mourn we just feel worn & torn.
I’m,
dying,
we’re,
dying,
lost my mind & found some time,

though still haven’t found the reasons yet for these rhymes,
or the least bit of redemption from sinnin’ in these trying times
but I still believe I will achieve because honestly I’m still trying,
but I’m, dying,

you are, dying,
so far gone,
so far gone,
so far gone you even miss you, so far gone I even miss me,
so far gone we even miss us, so far gone away getting dizzy,
THH3 95 ∆
for real, I feel,
sorta sickish, fading like Jaden Smith is getting Visions of,
assassination in public with a Sex Pistol hit with a quickness,
but no one knows who did this ‘cause there was no witnesses,
& if they do know they’re not snitching, life’s a b!tch b!itches,
& that b!tch is vicious, as vicious as Sid Vicious is,
but I’m married to this life so I’m gonna live it,

until I die I can’t divorce it stuck here in this body won’t give in,
suffocating in a corset plus stuck in this enormous system,
& all of it’s horrors it’s a sickness so I try to keep my distance,
from anyone displaying any obvious symptoms of an illness,
guess I need to get away from myself ‘cause I’ve got symptoms
feeling sorta sick,

held on firm at first took only a second to quickly lost my grip,
disorientated getting dizzy with the spins on this slippery deck,
no exit off this ship lost my way & my balance starting to slip,
the plot’s starting to twist resolve’s starting to give,

woke up in confusion & have been in delusion ever since,
the riddle’s not solved at all what kind of storm are we in,
what’s going on what memo didn’t I get,
& how’d I get involved at all ending up in the middle of all this?.
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 96 ∆
Smile (Gloria Carter [24]
Love is love,
it’s not that complicated,
Love does not care what color or sex you or your love is,
because Love is all inclusive it doesn’t discriminate,
Love is colorblind,
Love Sees No Color Love wears Cross Colours jumpers,
Love is abundant, just ask Russell Simmons or Gloria Carter,
or her baby Jay Z or anyone else who is an authentic Lover,
Love is unconditional & it’s available to everyone,

regardless of class social status religion region or color,
it’s okay to feel good, smile you deserve it,

dedicate yourself to love, believe me it’s worth it,
you get what you give so give 100%,
remember to forget & forgive them, even if they’re not perfect,

because no person walking this earth’s surface is,
but you can still find yourself a good girlfriend or boyfriend,
as long as you’re willing to work with them,
& you two can still be your own version of Bonnie & Clyde,
can still be in love & serve them with services,
there’s wisdom in these verses here,
THH3 97 ∆
modern day scriptures for gangstas & hipsters,
they don’t call him LaLux or J-Hova for nothing,
no fronting true strength requires no crutches or addictions,
just enough Dedication as Lil Wayne to get to 10,000 hours,

as laid out well by Macklemore or Malcolm Gladwell’s Outliers,
a Master of Self a Bastard from Hell,

dirty as hell but he cleans up well
I own all my Master,
you should probably own yours as well,
well,
the floods are coming, there’s some prophecy for you,
either ride the Tidal wave or get washed straight away,
washing the straight leg green jeans clean so there’s no proof,
only proof is us see our success & ourselves are Self Evident,
only witness God won’t testify against our business interest,
the evidence is obvious see we are all sovereign entities,
you are your own country so you are your own president,
a one person army a one person president,
who roams the whole globe everywhere’s their residence,
channelling these visions into verses of the present tense,
told you before I’m not a business man I’m a business, man,
I lament my heart strings on my sleeve like a laminate,

or rather a VIP lanyard lampin in the backstage backyard,
THH3 98 ∆
drinking black & green tea in the back of the green room,
leave me alone let me be need to breathe to let my guard down,
on tour with God I’ve got all my credentials,

along with other essential Inventors & all our odd inventions,
sure we’re a bit over zealous & you’re a bit over jealous,
but that’s no excuse to be rude in a suit to dudes in mascara,
don’t harass us & ask us to see our Backstage Passes,
you’re asking like an ass with no class should be embarrassed,
bruh back up yes we might monkey around,
but rest assured we’ve got gorillas that’re killas around us,
for real bruh I might be the first white guy with Rocafella,
like Fritz Pollard was the first black guy with Rockefeller,
interesting how the pendulum swings both ways,
how the sunny days come after the stormiest weather,
dedicated & down for whatever, willing to not hesitate,

go to work hard now & wait to take the credit later,
because I know how almost everyone wants to be down,

only after the fame comes around,
everyone’s an expert everybody wants to tell you what to do,
after you’ve already done it even though they don’t know how,
everyone wants to sail on the ship once it’s built,

but no one wants to pound the nails to help build it,
THH3 99 ∆
they want a free ride but don’t want to help drive or help fill it,
oh yeah I know that exact type of monetary parasitic vermin,
never in the kitchen but always at the table when I’m serving,
but not me I’m different,

DIY till I die I do the work even if it hurts like hell, oh well,
wearing a designer shirt getting dirt on my name brand denim,
in a hand made hand basket going straight to Hell,
with a bottle of Ace of Spades in hand might as well smile,
been through enough bad it’s time to be good,

been through enough sad it’s time to be happy,
been through enough negative stuff, said enough was enough,
shook it off & got some positivity,
but kept the negatives in case the past needs to be brought up,
jogged from our collective photographic memories,
bad times to good memories is emotional alchemy,

remember this even if you don’t remember me,
we’re Alchemists even if we be faded we don’t fade away,
hope good times are remembered as if they happened today,
when we’ve gone away because we all gotta go eventually,

it’s just a matter of when & in what way,
so if you forget everything just remember the following things,
THH3 100 ∆
I wish you good luck, good health, good love & good days,
no way,
anyone that didn’t go from nothing to everything could relate,
it’s amazing,
to be at the top of The Pyramid & see everything we made,
they call it Illuminati, we just call it Getting Paid,
makes me want to smile,

even though it’s tough being an intellectual existentialist,
which is basically an intellectual that’s also a pessimist,
& ignorance is bliss & torture is what comes to intellectualists,
in a world that rewards ignorance, oh well,
whatever, I could care less, I guess call me a ‘celibasexualist’,
misunderstood Lost in Translation need a translator,

& the bill waiter because I’m in a hurry like Bill Murray,
but whatever it’s my responsibility to make the art,
if they decide to listen it’s up to them it’s not my responsibility,
see we all play our part, we are all mixed colors on the palette,
a combination somewhere between free will & divine destiny,
like being a slave sweating for days & not getting paid,
all in the name of another man’s Manifest Destiny,
like being on the original Magna Carta,

like being in the womb of Ms. Gloria Carter,
yeah they might be smart but you’re much smarter,
THH3 101 ∆
taking risks but it’d be an honor to be a Spiritual Martyr,
so I tell it like it is & so be it if they crucify me,

not called J-Hova for no reason at all,
nails are the accusations they pound into me,
I’m the body the body of art is the cross I bare,
& yeah it hurts,

as insults often do,
but you haven’t made it until some of them hate it,
& we both know that’s the truth so don’t let it get to you,
& above everything else, smile,
because success, is the best revenge, love them to death,

& when you’re reborn go ahead & love them again,
because love always wins.
So smile,
because even though I might not see you when you wake,
I will always be sure to see you again,
I love you always always have always will,
we are the worst of enemies & the best of friends,
so be it,
let them all see it,
THH3 102 ∆
shine that little light of yours,
until we blind them all into seeing it,
show the whole world this Light of Love,

illuminate the Darkness with your verses,
because the best of blessings,
almost always originate from the worst of curses,
so take it easy on yourself & the mistakes you made,

because we all know as said before no one is perfect,
so take that frown turn it upside down,
& take that hurt & reverse it,
& smile,
& fear no man, “‘Cause the more I reveal me,

the more they’re afraid of the real me.”,
welcome back Carter, it’s been awhile, so smile,
Love is love,
it’s not that complicated,
Love does not care what color or sex you or your love is,
because Love is all inclusive it doesn’t discriminate,
& above all, smile.
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 103 ∆
So Close (We’re Almost There) [25]
Please hold on,

we’re almost there,
no I’m not sure where exactly there is,
but it’s definitely somewhere other than here,
& I know you hurt but what the fck fck it we all do,
& it gets difficult to hold on when there’s no one to hold on to,
& I know you’re getting sick of getting ran through,
& just want to run away but don’t know where to run to,
well let me assure you it’ll be okay no one else can hurt you,
just have some patience with yourself & you’ll make it through,
& I know it sometimes seems like life is taking forever,

your stress is making you restless & you just wish to end it,
but believe me things only get worse if you overdose not better,
if you don’t graduate Life’s Sentence you get suspended,
held over a year & have to do the whole thing over,
you don’t exterminate anguish with suicide you just suspend it,
it’s best to go any other way then by taking your own life,
so if you really want to flirt with death just live life reckless,
but whatever you do just don’t give up on me now,

we’re so close please hold on we’re almost there,
no I’m not sure where exactly there is,
but it’s definitely somewhere other than here…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 104 ∆
So Far Gone [26]
So far gone,
leaving behind spent jet fuel & jeweled remnants of memories,
on a plane in the 3rd dimension sitting 1st class,
with a world class Top Model chilling next to me,
gazing out the soft edged rectangular window to my left,

then over to the soft edged coke bottle model to my right,
don’t know which is better confused to which view to choose,
both views are wild highly prized self-realized & undefinable,
on a roll so after we change countries to change the weather,

we change clothes to match the country we’re adaptable,
not conditioned to air conditioners we prefer air that’s natural,
connects are reliable, specs are viable facts are undeniable,
always well equipped even though we pack light when traveling,
must face facts because we’re verified & the truth is verifiable,
so we choose to accept this life without a fight,

what films’s on the inflight entertainment tonight,
100s of options to select from hope I choose right,
I pick a good flick to watch with this chic as I wet my appetite,
dinner served soon what’s on the menu this time,
King Salmon arugula salad champagne & cloth napkins,
think we’ll eat & see a film starring one of my best friends,
he’s a superhero in the movie playing one of the X-Men,
THH3 105 ∆
I’ve been gone since way back when,
I went from hustling on pavements & cuddling in basements,
to being on gracious invitations to amazing celebrations,
obtaining the latest coveted creations of our generation,
placement upgraded I now lay in a place that is spacious,

on the top floor of a proper loft with views of the harbor,
not a golfer I don’t golf I find sports outrageous,
no jokes sinking balls in 3 strokes on Par-4s,
making cut shots but never taking mugshots or gut shots,
hitting Top Flights with wise guys on Trump’s golf course,
hole in one I’m Golden Son,
terms of endearment rules of engagement,

tears shed in statements still sad but thank God we made it,
out of the streets,

we’re done with that stress thanks to blessed chess moves,
now we fly through the friendly skies First Class,
like Gods like Zeus with beautiful Goddesses that’re too cute,
& we get offered so many options that it’s tough to choose,
so we just hold on to sworn untolds & let everything else go,

until our wills give up, our bodies fold & we’re cremated,
only thing that hasn’t changed since we’ve made it,
is the bond of our word so you’ll never hear convos restated,
THH3 106 ∆
we keep secrets that will never to be repeated ,
we run a tight ship no loose lips or leaks we keep our word,
just saying no statements just lots of amens & payments,
we’ll neither confirm nor deny those rumors that they heard,
most great men make no statements or engage slow agents,

they just make moves & arrangements in Asia like Statesmen,
we go off like the Mossad,

got those that prod caught off guard in a fictitious fog,
so lost they even begin to question our very existence,
no eyewitness our plots so efficient they can’t see the ball,
suspicious citizens fishin’ for sufficient evidence,
dragging nets coming up empty they get nothing at all,
reporters on a mission to get headlines for the Sunday edition,
but I’ve seen things believe me they don’t want to get involved,
all star star crossed lovers,

all scars dressed in cross colors,
on Heaven’s Cloud 9 hovering in a helicopter,
surfing my brainwaves on a Rusty as my thoughts hover,
he’ll adopt her,

if she’s mean as the streets are still somehow nice & proper,
a marveled heart stopper, with a solid heart beat bopper,
but if she acts up he won’t hesitate in a heart beat to drop her,
because the mean streets are his first love,
THH3 107 ∆
so sick with the business he might need a doctor,
so far gone one that weighs him down isn’t worth the bother,
so far gone on a level so far beyond that he’s honored,
with the type of resolve that gets all problems solved,
& a secret sauce along with a special recipe that conquers,
upwards & onwards,
a walking palindrome pantomime,

walking backwards I act out words,
& any friend of freedom is a friend of mine that’s a given,
see the future live in the moment then kick back afterwards,
rolling feeling high expressing these blessings in total bliss,
naturally high no cigarettes no alcohol no cocaine no ecstasy,
finally “Free at last, free at last, Thank God almighty,

we are free at last celebrating like Martin Luther King,
Living the Dream in the fast lane spending Johnny Cash,
in the Fast lane don’t plan to crash so I fly carefully,
Walking The Line,
I’m,
doing fine, so far gone,
I’m,
a bottom of the 9th, down by one runner on home run,
THH3 108 ∆
I’m,
outta here,
en route to a beach,
outta of range & outta reach,
a place where the photogs can’t peak,
not hiding just finding a place we can shine like diamonds,
an island with vibes like the water,
are clean & crystal clear,
& we can relax,
because,
we are,
here,
20/20 vision,
so my decisions like my vision are always crystal clear,
crystal clean missiles scream through the star lit night sky,
with a Starlet don’t startle us or confuse our caution as fear,
don’t mistake kindness for weakness & try to take advantage,
or it will be nice try nice guy, you lose dude maybe next time,
no good guys just bad boys living the Good Life,
bad boys with good hearts Tom cruising through Vanilla Sky,
in the air experiencing experiences on the fly,

only spent jet fuel & remnants of memories left behind,
have everything ahead of me, just had to get lost to find,
truth is everything I ever said, all good things in all good time,
see, I’m so far gone, my sweat smells like sweet success,
THH3 109 ∆
living my life, an American Dream in the flesh,
School of Hard Knocks did all my homework took no recess,
now it’s all recess allow me the luxury to reminisce & digress,
if you know how to read between the lines,

then there’s no need for a Reader’s Digest,
if you really what to know I let wealth get to know me,

I don’t work for the money the money works for me,
money doesn’t make the man man makes the money,
if you really want to get things done gotta do it on your lonely,
& when you finally get an opportunity to taste The Good Life,
don’t waste it savor it gently & take it slowly,
enjoy it while you can when you get the chance,
before it’s gone like I am on to the next one & only,
close the book chapter’s finished on to Destiny’s next story,

done with this dissertation on all The Good Life’s temptations,
where seduction done through Life’s luxuries was my specialty,
had my fun now it’s on to the next one, the next destination,
leave this life behind & let my actions & words speak for me,
which is why I leave behind these words as my literary legacy,
see I’m so far gone,

THH3 110 ∆
full throttle on time like Movado, all shine no bravado,
I swim in more waves than the Royal Navy,
“living la vida loca” no Ricky Martin, my life & my love’s crazy,
gazing lazily out the soft edged window to the left of me,
then over to the soft edged coke bottle model to my right,

if every man’s an island I’m an archipelago & the architect,
a Living Artifact a Futuristic Apostle Fossil a Prophet Artifact,
I collect art & checks such a crazy life I need my head checked,
fossil fuels burn all along, along with my memories,

so long I’m gone have been for centuries, so far gone,
so when they mention the greats, guaranteed they mention me,
remembered in words & songs so the lessons can carry on,
so gone leaving behind only jet fuel & remnants of memories,
because just like now when the end comes I’ll also be gone,
only came here in the first place because they sent for me,
so when I go I will wish you well with a “So long carry on!”,
so far gone, on a one way flight with no carry ons,

with a world class Top Model chilling next to me…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 111 ∆
So The Man In The Mirror Is Leaving Neverland [27]
I’m leaving Neverland, never to return again,

I’m leaving Neverland, for real & forever man,
I’m leaving Neverland,

& all it includes including the room with the elephant,
I refuse to continue to persist with this pernicious regiment,
this malicious malevolence will only lead to personal detriment,
no need to elaborate the rest of the reasons are irrelevant,
so I’m going & hoping it’s not an act of fallacious elopement,
it’s really just the elegant eloquent elephant in the room,

he gives me the feeling that I I need too escape soon,
he gives me the feeling that something is coming soon,
to a theatre near you & it features creatures looney as tunes,
don’t have to come with me if you don’t want to it’s up to you,

but I’ve gotta get away so in a moment I’ll be gone, ‘Poof’,
& yeah I know it kinda feels great to be here,

& yeah it would probably feel even better to stay,
at least it may in that selfish superficially carnal kind of way,
& I know that sounds like an absurdly crazy thing to say,
but it’s true so I’m tempted to stay but if I stay I will die inside,
& in doing so I’ll be giving away my most precious gift,
the only thing I actually own in this world,
my life,
THH3 112 ∆
because it’s not too late yet, but it will be if I wait,
to make a way to make all these wrongs right,
so I can’t hesitate or pull a fake, fate won’t wait now is the time,
to erase my past, all it’s mistakes, & start a new life,
it’s not too late, but will be if I wait,

so I simply can’t stay, no how no way,
can’t standby & deny what hides disguised in The Lie,

my Hometown of Hollywood has been corrupted,
they’ve made even the most innocent moments feel tainted,
the frame does not hang right on the painting they painted,
the picture is slanted but still holds a magic enchantment,
the people are fantastically attractive delightfully decorated,
animated charismatic narcissistic sarcastic jaded bandits,
taking everything for granted which happens when famous,
which means some get so numb they prey on the young,
go on show me a boy that hasn’t been toyed with at least once,
go on I’ll wait….
I bet you can’t find a single one.
Maybe that’s why I can’t play innocently with a little boy,

without feeling like I’m doing something wrong,
I mean I have never abused a child in my entire life,
so why do I feel uncomfortably confused by what’s going on,
THH3 113 ∆
what’s going on?
We all know what’s going on,

The Young & The Restless could be a list that’s forever long,
of confessions composed as a set list but not sung,
we all know They are attracted to the Innocent & Young,
because in the twisted logic, of their perverted minds’ tongue,
they think by being with children, they’ll stay Forever Young,
it’s disgusting, & I’m so ashamed of the city I’m from,
that I’m not even having kids, nope not even one,
because I already feel bad enough for those already born,
wish I could warn every daughter & ever son,
& don’t get me wrong I’m not trying to single out Hollywood,
the problems are much more widespread just ask The Vatican,
or the over 800 Boy Scouts that say they were abused,
by the hands of those that were chose to lead as captains,
yeah man not much is mentioned but lots has sure happened,
lots of names go undisclosed in the drawers of the Pedo-Files,

Roman Polanski, R. Kelly, Brian Singer, Jeffery Epstein,
& those are just the ones that have been exposed,
we all know most crimes go untold,
& no please don’t take this the wrong way,

I’m not trying to say every celeb likes kids underage,
in fact most of those that act are kind, protect & fight back,
THH3 114 ∆
nor am I saying I always mean attraction in a sexual way,
I’m just saying I feel confused & it seems like everyone’s gay,
or at least strange & most don’t know how to behave,
& I want to care but these days who cares anyways,
I guess I don’t anymore, I just want to get away,
just want to escape, so I’m running away,

& this is not an attack, or any other act of aggression,

this is not an insinuation or malicious accusation,
no need for Mesereau to get an acquittal through vindication,
because the fact is, I still love you, Mr., Michael Jackson,
& I’m sorry Ms. Jackson, I am for real,

never meant to make your daughter cry,
I apologize a trillion times,
now I’m Outkast, self banished myself like Lauryn Hill,
so Leave Me Alone, I told you I’m sorry Ms. Jackson,

& if truth be told, I still love you Mr. Jackson,
I still love you Michael Jackson,
& I’ll tell you what I think happened,

I think you were robbed of your childhood when young,
THH3 115 ∆
& your whole life you only wished to have one,
so you could feel safe enough to play & have fun,
& the only way to ever have the childhood you never had,
was to create your own sanctum paradise & call it Neverland,
with a ferris wheel carousel fairies trains giraffes & elephants,
your own fairytale so you’d never have to grow up, Peter Pan,
& you were so pure & kind & innocent,

& you really just wanted to play,
but over assumptive suspicious judgmental perverse minds,
made accusations called you strange & put you on display,
there is nothing worse than false accusations,

placed on an innocent man in an abrasive way,
& I still love Michael Jackson,

I mean I own a self-portrait painted by him,
it hangs in my hallway I pass it everyday,
on my way to the beach or the store or the gym,
I know his family we get together & jam,
I honestly don’t think any crime was committed by his hands,
no corroborated witnesses or substantiated evidence,
no confirmed scandalous facts no conclusive confessions,
the fact is the only fact that’s fact is that,
no facts show that anything happened,
still the malicious accusations caused an adverse reaction,
one that ultimately led to the death of Michael Jackson,
THH3 116 ∆
& sent me packing to search for some separation,
between art & artist, between man & God,
between who God created,
& what that who creates on their own,
everyone created creates from other’s creations,
trying to make peace with,

the fact that every gifted artist seems to be so twisted,
makes me suspicious, of every celebrity I know,
& all their addictions, because it’s different,
depending what position they’re in & what their addiction is,
I mean a bit of blow on weekends is one thing,
but being attracted to kitty holes goes way past addiction,
it’s not a recreational addiction it’s a sickness,
& we will never know most of the secrets that go untold,

because to know a secret that secret would have to be told,
& most unknown secrets go untold that’s why they’re secrets,
so no we will never know every secret that goes untold,
not even sure there is still hope,

since there exists in this existence so few willing to witness,
so the cycle will continue to go,
on & on without a willing witness,
when will it stop nobody know,

though we do know there’s always time for forgiveness,
THH3 117 ∆
Amen can I get a witness,
smooth as Tom Cruise is we move though this Risky Business,
anyways honestly at this point I don’t even care,

I just want to get the heck outta here,
you know what I mean Billy Jean,
the kid’s not mine so why should I stay or care,
but I’m still here as I stare, talking to the Man in The Mirror,
still trying to convince myself to get out of here,
it’s time to Beat It,

make my escape getaway like a Smooth Criminal,
because I realize now that all those messages,
were more than just unintentional subliminals,
& I don’t like The Way You Make Me Feel anymore,

so no I’m not going to wait here ‘Till You Get Enough,
I’m going to find a place where I actually feel appreciated,
because back in Hollywood They Don’t Care About Us,

don’t have to come with me if you don’t want to it’s up to you,

but I’ve gotta get away so in a moment I’ll be gone, ‘Poof’…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 118 ∆
So Over It [28]
I don’t care what you think,

with your misplaced delusional misconstrued notions of me,
see that’s the problem with you & your misguided perceptions,
misguided perceptions are just assumptions preconceived,
often false, it’s not my fault you’re locked in your own cell,
like Pablo trapped in a prison you built & designed yourself,
jailed song birds will always despise & never sing as sweet,
as free birds with real words who fly through the sky & prevail,
why would I ever concern myself with what you think of me?
I am strong, I am beautiful,
I am a brilliant star burning in infinite light,
I am bright, as the brightest day,
& also of course as black as the darkest night,
& these insecurities helped me improve my security,
so in away your attempts to slay me helped make me myself,
you can’t insult someone who’s already insulted themselves,
you can’t bury someone with slurs or insults or anything else,
who’s already on the ground in the hole they dug themselves,
because, I don’t care what you think,

so I’d rather be alone & free to roam free,
than be just another ‘thing’ under your or the public’s scrutiny,
stop screwing with me this is emotional mutiny!
THH3 119 ∆
& I’m over it, so I’m overthrowing this relationship,
I’m so over bowing down & bending over in this relationship,
outta patience I’m getting off your boat about to abandon ship,
I don’t want your overblown ego or to go on your power trips,
I don’t care what you think about me,

every word you say is dead so don’t even speak to me,
I’m a poet I still feel things words still deeply effect me,
you better believe every word you ever wrote I read personally,
used to care infinitely but now I don’t care anymore,
so anything you write won’t even get the time of day from me,
& as much as I’ve read of yours now that I’m published,
guaranteed anything I write down people will pick up & read,
read my lips & read my words,

I don’t care at all, what you think of me anymore,
I am,
so much more,
than your insults or exploits,
I’ve exercised my rights to express myself with my voice,
I am,
better than,
all of your personal politics,
& I no longer care what you think…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 120 ∆
Social [Dis] Functions [29]
Don’t even want to go out anymore,

may be because I’m not so young now,
plus it all feels like the same cliche anyways,
seen it all done it all already so I’d rather just stay in the house,
plus nothing overly productive ever comes,

from most over produced social functions,
it’s usually just over used people trying to meet new people,
that they think will elevate their social or financial situation,
gold diggers actors with no features investors with low figures,
singers with fake gold zippers coke sniffers with four fingers,
silicone exposed strippers & old directors of so-so pictures,
all linger in rooms of smoke & mirrors to toast cold liquor,
go figure,
so I’d rather just stay at home in the zone writing poems,

instead of go out on the town clubbing,
see I’d rather be known for what I create on my own,
than be known for being someone who’s famous for nothing,
& if you feel the same way hit me up come over & create,
got enough space for you to find a place I’ve got a big house,
you’re more than welcome to swing through & do what you do,
I’ve got multiple rooms & beautiful views throughout,
where you can go in to get it out & record it all down,
THH3 121 ∆
instead of go out & getting involved in with mediocre crowds,
& if we do decide to go out,

it would definitely not be to clubs,
it’d be to art shows or nature walks where we can chill out,
either solo alone or with someone or some ones that we love,
because whenever they say an event will be “So turned up.”,

we just dismiss it, don’t show up & respond with “So what?”,
done going out on the town to mess around I’m grown now,
not going out just to get trapped in some con’s contraption,
at a place where the Truth’s too quiet the music’s too loud,
everyone’s on the wall instead of getting involved in the action,
not looking around but down Instagramming & SnapChatting,
trying to show everyone that’s not there what’s happening,
in an attempt show off what a good time they’re having,
even though they’re depressed AF inside slowly dismantling,
that’s not originality inception, that’s creativity contraception,
that’s washed up, played out, that’s not tight that’s unraveling,
so no I don’t even want to go out anymore,

may be because I’m not so young now,
plus it all feels like the same cliche anyways,
seen it all done it all already so I’d rather just stay in the house.
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 122 ∆
Somewhere In California [30]
Woke up,
somewhere in California,
at a beautiful girl’s house,
what a good morning,
greeted in bed with tempe & eggs,

a kiss on the head & yes an organic espresso for sure,
whole meal homemade with whole foods by a Soul Queen,
no SPAM no Ma’am just blissful blessings yes Sir,
Mc Yogi on the speakers reminding us to Give Love of course,
was a Lonely Island til this Celestial Deity reached my shore,
not a comedy, no Samberg, just blue water & white sand forts,
wipe the sleep from my eyes, think it’s real but want to be sure,
you know it’s real when she’s as beautiful,

the morning after as she was the night before,
somewhere,
in California,
strumming kirtan & bumping gangsta music,
a vivid mix of futuristic livid linguistics & other exquisite mixes,
it’s fitting I make a poem for the moment from these thoughts,
which come from all the emotions these experiences brought,
a California Native born into a surreal existential existence,
who with persistence connects the dots of intense plots,
THH3 123 ∆
he’s aloof, elusive, reclusive & often difficult to witness,
so every call sounds long distance, even when it’s not,
but if it ever gets to complex to reach him,
you can always call collect & for you he’ll usually pick up,
conceived in Hollywood he grew in his mother’s womb,

which is why it makes sense that everything feels like a movie,
or at least the realist surreal Reality Show ever shown,
battled in this War of World’s in the name of Universal Peace,
see I’ll take a life before I make one,

I guess that makes me part Environmentalist part Eugenicist,
but I’m quick to jump into action if I witness an injustice,
I guess that makes me part Combatant part Pacifist,
but I also make people move their mouths from moves I make,
my name in the air guess that also makes me part Ventriloquist
make so much money, it doesn’t make sense,

& the poem’s almost finished so one question how real is this?
How real is it waking up,

somewhere in California,
at a beautiful girl’s house,
what a good morning…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 124 ∆
Somewhere in Silverlake [31]
I wake up,
with no shirt on,

somewhere in Silverlake,
with some girl in a bed, my head aches,
not sure if we fckd or if there was flirting or what,
seems there’s nothing here I’m certain of,

except that this place needs some curtains up,
because I’ve got the urge to cover up,
the sun is bright as a quasar,

too bright like it usually is on mornings such as these,
don’t remember much about the night before,
but I do remember one thing it was Halloween,
I had had a crew with me too,

A-List actors & such Wilding Out while hiding out at Hyde,
I remember after Hyde we headed up into the hills to Seth’s,
you know that guy that created The Family Guy,
going off like Nick Cannon telling jokes like Kevin Hart,
conversing with Zac flirting with starlets under the star lit sky,
servers serving senses blurring mixing mixed drinks,
the potent mix of egos & martinis made me tipsy & high,
THH3 125 ∆
in the fast lane there’s no offramp or time to think,
just time to drink have a good time & wave bye while passing,
poetic waxing latest fashions might miss it so don’t blink,
speeding, shirt off vampire disguise on, flashy action,
vampire cape waiving in the wind of the Uber XL, awesome,
on one drunk as Hell hanging out the window laughing,
this is such a heavenly hell & one I know all too well,
next day I awake in this bed but don’t know how it happened,
but what I do know is there is some tension,

hanging lazily suspended in the air,
& I still don’t have a shirt on,
& I still don’t know how the hell I got here,
thinking to myself,
“How the heck did I get here, how the heck do I get out?”.
How’d I get here?
Probably took the trail,

lit up by my high hopes & low self-esteem,
which probably led me to waking up with her next to me,
it’s bizarre I can feel her but still it feels like we’re in a dream,
a still dream, a moving motion picture,

a reality show, where we are all the actors,
she’s anxious & in a hurry, it’s her birthday,
THH3 126 ∆
her anxiousness makes me uncomfortable in the worst way,
plus I’m hung over in the worst way & terribly thirsty,
so I turn to her, barely awake & say,
“Please, if you wouldn’t mind could you be so kind,
as to point me to the exit so I can make my escape?”
I mean I know it’s her birthday,

but I in no way want to celebrate,
see she just wants to get ready again & have a good time,
but I just want to find a way to make my escape,
what an asshole I can be, without even noticing,

why do we hurt those closest the most without even noticing,
we could all use a wake up call,

there’s no salvation in these libations,
only broken hearts & broken promises,
it’s a rough road we’re on with no directions or destinations,
just some preconceived notions,

of each other’s recently released emotions,
just two emotionally spoiled overly jaded overgrown children,
building these grand sand castles in this Empire of Dirt,
just to watch them wash away with every ocean surge,
sure life’s a beach but she’s a beast when unleashed uncurbed,
scratching our Nine Inch Nails across the class blackboard,
see sometimes getting on nerves is the only way to be heard,
THH3 127 ∆
I hurt myself today, to see if I still feel,
I focus on the pain, the only thing that’s real,
what have we become, my sweetest friend,
everyone that we know, goes away in the end,
my mind spins,
she’s everything I am, we’re too similar to each other,
so we’re uncomfortable with each other,
because we’re uncomfortable with ourselves,
we are both two lone souls,
that do better on our own by ourselves,
& we could both use some serious assistance,
but we’re both to proud to ask for any help,
too proud to be humble, to envious to be appreciative,
too wrathful to be at peace, too lazy to put the effort in,
to greedy to give our time, too gluttonous to starve our egos,
but the lust oh the lust, the lust just keeps keeping us in…
In,
vain,
I see,
so plain,
she’s a victim,
of her own vanity,
would rather get a mani/pedi,
than spend time with a man that loves her madly,
this is insanity…
THH3 128 ∆
& I want to shake her awake,
but how can we wake someone else up,
when we’re asleep ourselves,
true love is hard work & we’re not willing to put in the effort,
& the thought of all we’ve lost is too much so we sleep it off,
we party all night & sleep all day,
because sometimes it’s easier to sleep it off,
than it is to open our eyes & be wide awake…
I wake up,
with no shirt on,

somewhere in Silverlake,
with some girl in a bed, my head aches,
not sure if we fckd or if there was flirting or what,
just this lingering hurt when,

did we become self inflicted victims of our own vices,
caught in this maze,
slaves to our ways in the last days of our lives’ trip,
this is how I cope because it’s,
better than tying the rope,
I’m alive not because I want to be,
I’m alive because I tried suicide & God said “Nope.”,
so now I’m left to my own devices alone with my vices,
THH3 129 ∆
slightly off topic lightly high online as I lay here & write this,
on a mission from God I don’t have my own plan,
just have these reeling feelings that I write out with both hands,
damn,
when did it all become so complicated,
what happened to butterflies fairytales & summer somersaults
when did we all become so detached & jaded,
I want to erase this,

I want to replace this,
I want to heal & rebuild,
but it seems I’m too wasted,
face it, after the distractions you have to face yourself,

fact is, for all your actions you have to blame yourself,
so after I wake up, with no shirt on, somewhere in Silverlake,
I escape,
I escape the bed make my way downstairs to the bathroom,

splash some cold water on my face stare at the man in mirror,
& try to get it together or at least get a shirt on,
so I can make my way to the door & get the fck outta there…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 130 ∆
Somewhere Over The Rainbow [32]
I love her,
& I hope to,
one day soon,
be together again united with her,
I pray we see each other somewhere over the rainbow,
when we’ve cleansed & are pure enough to see clearly,
when we’ve redeemed ourselves enough to earn our halos,
when we finally reach the Heavens & meet on Cloud 9,
kinda like we did that one day,

on that mountain top,
I hope to see you again in a similar place someday,
sometime, someplace, somewhere over the rainbow,
"Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high,

in a land that I’ve heard of once in a lullaby.,
Somewhere over the rainbow, where skies are blue,
& the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true.”.
Sometimes only in the darkest shadows,

do our deepest secrets come to light…
One of her earliest memories, was that of being raped,
that’s right, no foreplay in this poem,

right into it, like what happened to her when she was torn open,
THH3 131 ∆
one of her earliest memories,
was not of flowers or ice cream or curious cats,
it was of her grandfather’s curious hands,
& his lizard fingers which slithered their way up her dress,
raped by the same one who was supposed to protect her,
painful facts of heinous acts we don’t have to let them linger,
we can just get them out into the open, I mean it’s so common,
it’s even happened to the rich & famous,
just ask The Cranberries’ Dolores O’Riordan,
or Amy Shumer or Gabrielle Union or Tori Amos,
or Teri Hatcher or Jane Fonda or Pamela Anderson,
or Lady Gaga or Madonna or Kelly McGillis,
or Oprah Winfrey or Fran Drescher, or Mo’Nique,
or AnnaLynne McCord or Kesha or Queen Latifah,
or Alyssa Milano or Ashley Judd or Ashley Graham,
& these are the celebrities, most common folks are ignored,
& even these are just a fraction of the celebrity victims,
because even women in powerful positions often file no report,
but it’s not just women that get sexually abused,

it happens to men too,
the movement transcends gender,
so you can also include dudes on that list of #metoos,
& that list includes Tim Roth & Scott Weiland,
Cory Feldman & Santana & Terry Crews,
Brendan Fraser & Alex Winter & Anthony Edwards,
R Kelly & Billy Holiday & Tyler Perry too just to name a few,
THH3 132 ∆
you see the truth is sexual abuse is so common,
that even Common has come out & said he was abused,
so it makes sense that I can’t stand another man’s essence,
see I too was molested as a prepubescent adolescent youth,
I’ll admit it, hey I’m just grateful it wasn’t done by my parents,
I’ve been touched inappropriately, it’s time to avow this bruise,
because we can’t begin healing a wound until we open it up,
but enough about me already, what about you?
Let’s bring our skeletons out of our closets,

so we can stop the nonsense of these monster’s abuse.
How is assault so common yet so often kept covered up,

how is it so constant yet the subject completely oppressed,
are we so used to this abuse that we choose to not speak up,
silently keeping secret breaches concealed to go unnoticed,
no protest just us capricious divas who remain speechless,
I guess I’m not surprised ‘cause it’s kinda exactly like,
what happens to those that’re molested & in turn molest,
defiled young girls staying silent while screaming inside,
sometimes it’s from outside but many times it’s incest,
taken advantage of by members of their own tribe,
disrespected by the same ones elected to protect them,
homegrown pain happens at home so there’s no place to hide,
the fact that those relatives that’re supposed to preserve,

are usually the worst pervs hurts so much it makes me sick,
THH3 133 ∆
her breasts touched by the same man that married the woman,
that breastfed her, in other words touched by gramps,
the man who birthed the woman that birthed her hurts her,
as her grandfather’s hand’s curious fingers,

find his granddaughter’s lap & her earliest innocence,
& she’s not sleeping but still she’s squeezing,
her eyes closed like if she tries hard enough he’ll evaporate,
but her hopes go bust because he does not give up,
he does not disappear instead to grows more insistent,
as he fulfills his sickening twisted sense of sexuality,
taking her innocence & giving her everlasting emptiness.
Why do those closest to us, cause us the most harm,

why was she girl more comfortable, telling me what happened,
than telling her own family what had happened,
maybe because the trust was gone in a flash &,
the love was lost forever,
because the ones closest to her had betrayed her.
Why does the wonderful American Dream,

sometimes feel more like a terrible nightmare,
one where you’re dreaming that you’re being attacked,
but are so paralyzed by fear you can’t scream or fight back,
silenced by the violence,
that’s personally occurring to you,
& you’re trying to pretend you’re asleep,
THH3 134 ∆
but you’re wide awake wanting to escape this dream…
This is most of what she told me,

communicated through her confessions of all these things,
which was a bit surprising considering I’d only just met her,
moments ago around a campfire at a Rainbow Gathering,
over conversations about God at this festival in the forest,
& I swear she told me her story knowing it was important,
subliminally knowing I was the mouthpiece of our generation,
writing words so loud they can no longer afford to ignore us,
a mouthpiece for the speechless, a face for the faceless,
a name for the nameless, a case in point that’s ageless,
so we can at least have a basic basis point of reference,
in order to give them no option to any longer ignore us,
or ignore it,
either way she reminded me of a portrait,
by an artist who’s name I can’t recall now,
anyways not important now where were we in this story?
Ah yes,
we were at that campfire where at first I’d said nothing,

for I was sure she didn’t want to be bothered,
the last thing a a girl as beautiful as her needs,
is another guy telling her how beautiful she is,
& it was true she was beautiful,
she had that timeless Neo-Classical look,
& come to think of it it was actually somewhat spooky,
THH3 135 ∆
because she reminded me exactly of a living ghost,
but I kept all those thoughts to myself, until the next day,
when she appeared again, yes like a ghost,
& this time she spoke first, & after she did I explained,
how she reminded me of a portrait,
by an artist,
who’s name I couldn’t recall,
she looked at me with vividly electric eyes,
staring through my eyes & directly into my soul,
she had me instantly she knew it,
& now that she had me she refused to let me go,
so, we took a walk,

up a mountain, to my hammock,
overlooking a mountain range,
where we had this world that was our own,
our own little love bubble with without a bit of trouble,
up there on that mountain top, in that cocoon of a hammock,
damn it how come nothing good ever lasts that long?
We had this moment of ignorant blissful innocence,

where we nothing was known of each other’s past,
we made love,
& it felt as pure as the Summer Sun’s rays,
it’s ironic to think that two people so tainted & in pain,
THH3 136 ∆
can make love is such a purely pure & wonderful way,
it’s ironic to think that the very thing that had dirtied us,
was also assisting us to wash clean,
& I don’t need to go into any more detail,

of the obscene things we’ve seen,
because if you’ve been through what we’ve been through,
then you already know what I mean,
I guess our resolve is a testament to the power of love.
Amazed as she rode me,

it felt like I was making love with a priceless portrait,
as if a painting in a museum had come alive,
& embraced me in all it’s colors,
like that film Loving Vincent,
except in this film no one is innocent even when gorgeous,
her sparkling hair, reflected sun lit rainbows,
her vivid electric eyes, reflected the greens of the rolling grass,
she came I came we came,
& then after that onto my chest she collapsed,
into my arms I held her there was no future nor past,
in that beautiful moment there was only these two loners,
balancing together in a miraculous balancing act,
unmasked, how come nothing good ever lasts?
We rested with each other, healing each other,
THH3 137 ∆
as much as we could, on that mountain in that hammock,
& we made plans but we all know what happens,
when we make plans God laughs…
At this point I still knew nothing of her past,

& she still knew nothing of mine,
see when you’re really in the moment,
the past seems irrelevant, at least sometimes,
& the future seems far away,
& all you want is the moment you’re in to last,
with the one you’re in it with,
& speaking of the moment where were we at anyways?
Ah yes,
I was walking with her back down the mountain,

when we found a camp serving food,
this was a Rainbow Gathering after all remember,
so there was free food in the woods,
& it was there that she told me everything.
She told me she’d been raped, so many times she’d lost count,
first by her grandfather, then by her father,

then by different strangers,
I tried to stay strong when she asked me to hold her,
I held her safely, as she told me,
THH3 138 ∆
the most painful stories I’ve ever heard,
without shedding a single tear,
so strong she was,

for being so delicate,
I asked her how her molestations had happened,
so she could express herself & maybe make some sense of it,
she said she didn’t exactly know,

I asked her if she’d ever gone to the police,
she said definitely no, I asked her why not,
& what she said next seriously surprised me,
she said she never wanted to get the men in trouble,
because she felt sorry for the guys,
as much as they’d abused her,
she had pity for them & always tried to empathize,
this hit me like the heaviest of epiphanies, tears hit my eyes,
she said she’d talked to each one,

after they’d done what they’d done,
she talked to her father,
& also to her grandfather,
she told them she understood it wasn’t their fault,
they had a perverse disease that became a problem,
or more specifically a distorted sickness,
& that this cycle had to stop no there was no other option.
THH3 139 ∆
THIS CYCLE HAS TO BE STOPPED.
I shouldn’t have to be the voice for these girls,

& be the one that talks about rape,
she shouldn’t have to share these secrets with me secretly,
because these things shouldn’t happen in the first place,
but this is not a world of should’ves’ & could’ves’,

this is a world of exacts,
this is a world of loud brags & silent abuses,
& I’m sick of this sickness what’s wrong with us?
What’s wrong with us,

why does this continue to happen,
how can we make amends, defend & mend ourselves,
heal ourselves enough to make sure it never again happens?
Because prevention is better than cure so how do we stop,

these things from happening in the first place,
how can we find a way where families can feel safe,
so that no more horrors happen at kid’s birthdays,
& speaking of happening where were we again anyways?
Ah yes,
I was talking with her at that camp,

that we’d found serving food,
THH3 140 ∆
this was a Rainbow Gathering after all remember,
so there was free food in the woods,
& it was there that I offered her my everything.
In a way it was my way of trying to compensate,

for all the horrible men in her existence,
I wanted to truly share pure love with her without worries,
where we could be in love together without resistance,
I told her she could run away with me, that we’d be safe,
I told her I’d saved up a small fortune, enough to share,
I offered her my hand & the prospect of making a home,
I offered her the option of helping us create a sanctuary,
a safe place for anyone else that’s ever been abused,

so that they could finally lay & get some rest in peace,
& then I thought maybe I was just as bad as her abusers,

because I’d had sex with her too,
& yes the sex was 100% consensual,
& yes that’s 100% the truth,
but it still felt wrong,
once she’d told me her past,
it still made me feel like she’d been taken advantage of,
& maybe I’d taken advantage of that fact,
& so I guess in a way we both felt sick,
THH3 141 ∆
we both held things in that we still had to admit,
like how suicide was something we’d both tried to commit,
& how we don’t know what the point was to any of this is,
& because of all of this & how twisted we both were,

I knew that there was no way she would accept my offer,
because when someone’s been wronged that much,
they don’t know what right is no longer,
sometimes someone is so far gone,
that escape from rape doesn’t seem worth the bother,
see sometimes, when you’ve been wronged your whole life,

you lose sight of what right is,
& honestly I feel exactly the same way as her sometimes,
which is exactly why I took the time to write this,
to let her know I still love her,

& I hope to, one day soon, be together again united with her,
I pray we see each other somewhere over the rainbow,
when we’ve cleansed & are pure enough to see clearly,
when we’ve redeemed ourselves enough to earn our halos,
when we finally reach the Heavens & meet on Cloud 9,
"Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high,

in a land that I’ve heard of once in a lullaby.,
Somewhere over the rainbow, where skies are blue,
& the dreams that you dare to dream really do come true.”…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 142 ∆
Son of A Gun in The Wild West [33]
Culture Vultures dining on the carcasses,

of unsuspecting artists who recently departed this,
culture that acts as if everyone is targeted,
& surprise, we are, whether bisexual or bipartisan,
or both no vote only the onset of consumer communism,
swimming in a mainstream socialist monarchism,
a subconscious stream of consciousness,
consumed by a constantly contradicting,
condition of post modern consumerism,
an avalanche of retail therapy & the avant of avant-gardism,
doesn’t have to be a better product or improved edition,
just has to be better packaged & effectively marketed,
sold our souls for glitter not gold the ego is an extortionist,
don’t own anything anymore not even our own cognizance,
lost every investment like back when The Great Depression hit,
just look at what the mass media market did,

our collective memories & ancient traditions all but forgotten,
rewired genes in designer jeans on intoxicants,
symbolizing a degenerative disease like Parkinson’s,
want to end this madness but don’t know who started it,
so who can we blame but ourselves in all honestness,
as we absorb Virtual Reality & ignore Actual Reality we slip,
into a vivid collectively created occultism of Oculus,
Rift we drift into thee abyss of dark indifferences…
THH3 143 ∆
Neglecting the blueprint,
everybody’s a studio gangsta these days just ask 50 Cent,
ethically bankrupt lazy played daisies too spent to invent,
futilely trying to copy Jay-Z’s original Blueprint,
but no body has a DJ Clue what to do or where to begin,
nor a Ty Dolla to spare still everyone’s got their two cents,
all opinions given without consideration for common sense,
no motivation or wisdom taken from the Grand Architect,
what good is giving good advice if no one is taking it,
or even taking the time to listen they just dismiss it quick,
showing off trophies boldly donating charity checks,
acting like champions we bare & beat our chest,
wearing fool’s gold & blood diamonds to gain respect,
sitting on the throne but we’ve won nothing yet,
honestly it feels like we haven’t even started yet,

still we feel exhausted from this rat race for dominance,
slaves of an alien race hand on hearts we pledge allegiances,
with, our unquestioning obedience & faux pas ambiance.
& it’s all almost over for our entire empire,

so every moment better cherish it,
bleached white robes with Chipko flip flops,
we hold the reins to Her Majesty’s chariot,
whipping the 500 horses to a froth with no compassion at all,
our Kings are all Pawns & our Princes are the pettiest,
whipping in a Cadillac crashing into a pole then walking off,
driving in the fast lane living the fast life gets you buried quick,
THH3 144 ∆
so I try & pace it & not get too wasted still I feel very sick,
seems like it’s time to go but honestly I’m not ready yet,
though when captain screams “You move too slow sailor!”,
that’s when it’s time up & time to depart this ship,
but you can’t rush good art & I’m an articulating artisan,
so I keep being an artist until departing on a martian ship,
artfully getting away with the heist of the day no pardoning,
in a constant state of affairs is why I haven’t married yet,
which of course means no divorce from any or all of this,
so I continue to translate transmissions without prejudice,
love is star crossed & colorblind in it’s brilliance like Edison,
& my wondermind shines in wonderland’s luminescence,
as I illustrate illustrious illuminations of wonderment,
off every possible edifice in this hedonistic eden’s Matrix trick,
eclectically arranged ambiance in this Electric Renaissance,
is enough to effectively deliver this rebel’s renegade testament,
I write light before I become just another martyr,

for the Martian’s master plans,
my words are honest sonnets,
on tablets of mono-cultured monograms,
mono-glyphs that shine like a lighthouse beacon,
on the top of the Tower of Babel atop a cavernous monolith…
This is all honest in all honestness.
Here at the docks,
THH3 145 ∆
here with assorted Goddesses & narcissistic walruses,
way up going under,
not trying to be negative but the only thing I’m positive of is,
Culture Vultures continue dining on the carcasses,
of unsuspecting artists who recently departed this,
culture that acts as if everyone is targeted,
& surprise, we are, whether bisexual or bipartisan,
so stay up, keep up & keep open your eyelids,

because the games have just started kid.
This is all honest kid.
& I’m open to discuss almost everything,

except religion & of course politics,
so if you’re having an issue then tell me what the problem is,
& maybe we can solve it quick,
& just admit if you’re involved in conflict,
& maybe we can resolve it quick,
& please don’t blame the Dalai Lama,
or Obama’s broken promises,
see we all have soiled wings,

just like these vultures that pick at our carcasses,
as we dine on Soylent Green,
served hot from the melting pot of concubine colleges,
with Charlton Heston & a Smith & Wesson concealed,
just in case drama pops off & they want to start some sh!t,
THH3 146 ∆
can’t be too careful especially these days see,
wrong right black white day night everything has it’s opposites,
so even the kindest animals,
will turn into carnivorous cannibals when all that’s left,
is blown kisses well wishes dirty dishes,
corrupt princes & spiritual paralysis,
this is the age of the dawning of Aquarius,
& the end of our passing genesis…
But what do I know I’m just a Son of a Gun,

on the run writing this mystic futuristic hit-list,
dressed to the nines with a bottle of moonshine,
a bunch of empty cartridges & some fellow Philosophists,
in the Wild West with Clint Eastwood & Billy The Kid,
clean as a whistle mixin’ addictions with additives,
inventing new recipes with Dirty Harry’s pharmacist,
as The Good Bad & The Ugly along with other accomplices,
take shots of acid rain while eating on magic cactuses,
howling at the full moon with peyote coyotes it’s ridiculous,
laughing phantasms absent minded off the absinthe mix…
Alive,
right here,
left for dead,
insane & out of practice with,
no clean water in the canteen to drink,
& circling are the Culture Vultures just above our heads,
THH3 147 ∆
this Teenage Wasteland has no purpose with,
riff raft rats that can’t act & lack genitals,
religious rabbits in the crosshairs of deserted desert tortoises,
tumbleweeds & inbreeds snake oil salesmen on pedestals,
you see these badlands are so bad that’s it’s painfully obvious,
they can make even the most stout professional professionals,
fill with doubt, seem, & act like just silly little naive novices,
can get a massage but no happy endings in these vortexes,
there’s nothing left to see here in this mirage at all,
except the reds of my rusty gun as it tarnishes.
My visions getting blurry body’s stopped,

but my mind’s still hurried exactly what anxious exhaustion is,
& I’d escape if I knew a way out but instead I stay & lay,
because honestly I’m not sure if I have any other options left…
See I knew I would go,

I told you before everyone is targeted,
so soon it seems,
I’ll just be another one of the unsuspecting artisans,
the Culture Vultures overhead dine on when feeling peckishish,
terminated,
no Terminator, but you can bet, like Arnold said,
“I’ll be back.”, like I just started this…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 148 ∆
Soul Dreaming (Lost & Found) [34]
Lost you in a dream last night,

seemed somehow you’d gone away,
tried frantically to find your number in my phone,
but by the time I did I’d already forgotten your name,
dreams, are funny that way,
just when you think you’ve got someone,
that someone goes away,
dreams seem so real until you awake alone,
but how does that matter now, if life is but a dream,

& if life is but a dream to our Soul,
then what becomes of our Life’s Dream,
when we finally so goodbye & exit this world?
Left with just memories of memories,

& already even these emotions feel abstract,
& we can take all the time we want when we’re dreaming,
but when we wake we can’t take a single moment back,
how real is that?
Already everything’s fading to black,

getting, tired,
so tired,
exhausted.
THH3 149 ∆
Can barely, get these words written down,
can barely, get those words read aloud,
fuzzy headed, over medicated, fading out,
alive right now, left out here with the walking dead…
What was that, did you say something?

Is what your saying merely only lonely words?
Is what I’m writing merely only lonely words?
I wanna be alone but not lonely of course,
so please be kind enough to hold me, I need some support,
I’m off course, can’t return, I’m bored, so bored.
Tired, so tired, exhausted.
Please be so kind as to remind me why I write,

& I’ll be so kind as to remind you why we’re alive,
& I know it all doesn’t make perfect sense right now,
but like all good things give it time & on day it will,
that’s why when I lost you in a dream last night & got the chills
I told myself to chill even though it seemed you’d gone away,
& I tried frantically to find your number in my phone,
but by the time I did I’d already forgotten your name,
oh well I guess dreams are funny that way,
see just when you think you’ve got someone,
that someone you think you had goes away,
see dreams seem so real until you awake alone…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 150 ∆
Soul Food (Bon Appetit) [35]
Never said I was a good influence,

played hooky no class attendance,
no rules,
that’s so true,
Old School of Hard Knocks,
I told you, I know dudes, I know truth,
that’s so true, food for thought,

you look hungry, so eat it up like soul food…
Soulful at the same time so rude.
I know lies,
I’ve seen spies,
on assignment from some energy vampires,
sold us dreams or rather traded them to us for our desires,
it’s a barter system,

an ashy Ashby Flea market,
used goods, with a modern modest mark up,
a few fruits, leather shoes & vintage jeans with worn pockets,
Red Hot Chilly Peppers,

incense, used clothes,
headdresses with Indian feathers,
THH3 151 ∆
& whatever else is there, will it ever end, who knows,
who the fck cares?
Never said I was a good influence,

played hooky no class attendance,
always on the precipice,
of continuous congruence,
no rules,
that’s so true,
never said that I was a good role model,

though you could probably market my whole model,
USA84 American made like a cherry red Mustang,
the only solo bro with a twin throttle,
white as lightening in a bottle with a suntan,
this is the new & improved super duper model,
& yeah you’re into that now but that’s my old model,
on to the next, Rocafella checks, Ace in pockets, gold bottles,
no Bono no homo no U2 no YouTube not too rude,

not even if I’m half naked fondling another dude’s manboobs,
just another loco home bro with kilos of Pablo’s primo coco,
jacking up the gene pool with DEA DNA in an alphabet soup,
THH3 152 ∆
I told you, these words are soul food,
shoot for the stars, send your soul through, if you play hoops,
go ahead, it’s worth a shot don’t worry I got you,

wanna go for the 3 or go in for the alley oop?
my attitude’s totally screwed,

so what, what’s that gotta do with you?
Maybe I’m a pompous pooch that deserves to be sued,

but whatever I refuse to be used to the point of abuse,
no I won’t be subdued or allow any stooge to dilute our truth,
vision’s astute when it comes to obtaining the goals pursued.
No limits so get it I told you there’s no rules.
No rules,
that’s so true,
that’s so true, food for thought,

you look hungry, so eat it up like soul food…
Δ LuLux Δ
THH3 153 ∆
Space Needle (Record Spins) [36]
It’s raining,
out in space,
on the needle in Seattle,
the record spins at an agreeable pace,
& every song sounds cliche,

we're stressed out domesticated & wild,
got this knot in my stomach again,
hey how have you been I know it’s been awhile,
but we’re back in the Swedish House Mafia with John Martin,
& God says,

“Don’t you worry don’t you worry child,
see Heaven’s got a plan for you.”,
how have you been I know it’s been awhile,
what’s up with you, have you finally found your truth?
Even though time’s only relevant,

so in the future we’ll reminisce,
about when our stars crossed in spontaneous ascension,
into the darkness of this infinitely deep Abyss.
Ships passing in the night,

whatever to get my mind right,
whatever to take the edge away from us, to numb the pain,
THH3 154 ∆
take the edge away first then happy end with a migraine,
passing trains,
train tracks,
trains wreck,
we connect,
a flash of lights,
I, I, I am by your side,
everything else fades,
fire in your eyes,
flicker like fireflies,
it’s gonna be a fire fight,
because both of us,
still fight for our rights,
ships passing in the night,

whatever to get my mind right,
whatever to take the edge away from us, to numb the pain,
take the edge away first then happy end with a migraine,
passing trains,
train tracks,
trains wreck,
we connect,
a flash of lights,
I, I, I am by your side,
everything else fades,
fire in your eyes,
THH3 155 ∆
flicker like fireflies,
it’s gonna be a fire fight,
because both of us,
still fight for our rights,
all the time like how chances come,

as flash floods do across our plains,
you had me you held me,
waged your war then left me slayed,
laid,
out across that battlefield,
chest open heart exposed & drained,
love light extinguished lighter out of lighter fluid...
I thought I had the answer,

& I thought you knew it,
opportunities come like thunderstorms,
don't wanna hear that you had your chance & blew it…
So don’t blow it,

just go with it,
if life gives you lemons make lemonade,
go outside & build a snowman if it’s snowin’.
It’s raining,
out in space,
on the needle in Seattle,
THH3 156 ∆
the record spins at an agreeable pace,
& every song sounds cliche,

we're stressed out domesticated & wild,
got this knot in my stomach again,
hey how have you been I know it’s been awhile,
but we’re back in the Swedish House Mafia with John Martin,
& God says,

“Don’t you worry don’t you worry child,
see Heaven’s got a plan for you.”,
how have you been I know it’s been awhile,
what’s up with you, have you finally found your truth?
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 157 ∆
Speaking Easy (Salsa Rock) [37]
At a genuine Colombian Speakeasy,

where we party as if we’ve stepped back in time,
reminds me of Sayer’s back in LA with Rumer & Mike,
reminds me to wonder why we still have to hide,
why do the brightest Lights always have to hide their shine?
Why must we hide the actions from our passions,

or even assume that we have to,
why do you let our assumptions of other’s assumptions,
overtly oppress & effectively control you?
This psychological oppression’s been going on way too long,
been going on since long before Scotty Bowers,

since long before the Stonewall uprising in Greenwich Village,
since long before Speakeasies & secret bars,
since long before gays were allowed to legally parent children,
I mean what’s the problem it’s hard to tell,

queers can be macho too just ask Pacho from the Cali Cartel,
‘Gaystas’ have running affairs since way back when,

from underground clubs in Manhattan to cafes in Amsterdam,
from SanFran to the not so well kept secret bars in Marrakech
where rumor has it the King is even gay & likes to smoke hash,
THH3 158 ∆
& hey I’m not gay I’m just saying, everyone deserves respect,
everyone deserves the time of day even if dressed up in drag,
we don’t need hide to feel relaxed enough to dance & express,
LGBT should just mean human it’s as simple as that,
nobody owns our bodies, we have the right to choose,
what we choose to do & with who is our personal preference,
so why do some of the places that we socialize,
still have to hide behind a secret entrance?
& there’s that word again, Secret.
Well hell I’m tired of hiding, I’m coming out of the closet,
& I’m not even gay, just honest, & wanna openly dance salsa,
at this Speakeasy in Colombia with men & women,
my God we are the Most Beautiful Gentle Monsters,
so take this dance with me,
it’s Salsa so it’d be rude to refuse,
let’s catch that Saturday Night Fever like John Travolta,
because outside the guestlist is tight but inside we’re footloose,
getting real loose with nothing to lose & nothing to hide,
at a genuine Colombian Speakeasy,
where we party as if we’ve stepped back in time,
reminds me of Sayer’s back in LA with Rumer & Mike,
reminds me to wonder why we still have to hide,
why do the brightest Lights always have to hide their shine?
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 159 ∆
Spontaneous Combustion [38]
I am, indebted,
to her like a samurai,
that’s why she is my girl,
& I am her guy,
she is my Mermaid,
& I am her slave,
so I always come second,
& she always takes first place,
at worst case,
I knew she’d get me with the right hook & a nice look,
because I’m a sucker for a good flirt with good words,
almost as much as I’m a sucker for good books,
so I took,
the bait hook line & sinker, she reeled me in I was landed,
she got me with the right hook, even though she’s left handed,
in public we keep a low profile, though we have high standards,
we take nothing for granted,

I hand her the ground where I’m standing,
total opposites that’s why we fit together,
every moment spontaneous with no planning,
see existence exists in every instant,
THH3 160 ∆
an instance of this is the embodiment of existential bliss,
which happens when her & I unite,
our unity is recognized with a glance & sealed with a kiss,
like a rose I suppose, which is another pop reference,
Seal, kiss, rose, now do you get it?
See there are similarities in my similes,

& metamorphosis in my metaphors,
& no I’m not anal about my analogies,
or allergic to the verses so there’s always more in store,
topic always hot like that shop at the mall is,

that’s us when we’re on fire like a phoenix in Phoenix,
see she saved me after I’d been crucified & burned,
not by Romans, by romance so I owe her my soul like Jesus,
I mean this,
spoken art lights up from our broken Hearts of Darkness,

broke apart lit the spark we are Spontaneous Combustion,
in our own utopia sipping Coppola Rosso at Blancaneaux,
lightening bolts lighting up the sky she’s where I put my trust in,
when we’re together no matter the weather everything’s better,
this is not the same old Apocalypse this is a whole new Origin,
never rusting or rushing,
her mom died so on Mother’s Day we went to the beach,
THH3 161 ∆
she protected me from myself & I protected her from the wind,
see we live life grateful for every moment of our lives,
because we all know we’re all gonna go, just don’t know when,
well one day you’ll be gone & your love will be gone,
one day we’ll all get lost & then get gone like the wind,
until then no time for pretend, this is real love no counterfeit,
this is both generous & genuine as well as loyal & constant,
when,
with her, here, I feel found,
her heartbeat in her chest is my lullaby for restless nights,
I feel safest when I hear the sound of heart as it pounds,
see I’ve always been a fighter, a guardian, a gladiator,
so I’m glad when with her because when she holds me tight,
I feel safe enough that I can let my guard down,
relax & not have to worry or fight,
& that’s why
I am, indebted, to her like a samurai,

that’s why she is my girl, & I am her guy,
she is my Mermaid, & I am her slave,

so I always come second & she always takes first place…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 162 ∆
Stay Blessed [39]
Wake,
stretch,
give thanks,
stay blessed,
yoga is a daily meditation, it always defeats a head depression,

so clear your head & do a few yoga poses, go ahead,
you don’t have to meditate for 90 minutes every day,

even just a few minutes helps in so many ways,
your body is your temple, honor it accordingly,

it’s important to support it tune in & respect yourself faithfully,
that’s why personally I mix my asanas with vegetables,

but no pasta, nah, because I’m gluten free,
stay hydrated invariably, drink at least 8 glasses a day,
made it successfully outta the gutters & off of the streets,
from lower low class to the upper echelons of high society,
it’s okay to celebrate it perpetually celebrating like a celebrity,
now have the luxury to work on self improvements,
now explore other countries at my leisure traveling the world,
now I practice Jiu-Jitsu, with the Gracies in Beverly Hills,
now I’ve got beautiful guy friends, & amazing lover girls,
understand that these hands can massage your tensions,
or if you’re a threat they can choke you into submission,
THH3 163 ∆
I could plant a seed that gives birth to life or a tree,
or I could take a life away in less than 8 seconds,
forget the metrics I can give life & taketh life away,
I’d say it’s all just a matter of opinions & intentions,
seems those who had it hardest become the most self made,
makes sense since necessity is the mother of all inventions,
shout out to Plato for coming up with that one,

as we mold our future like Play Doh,
see we literally made everything we have,
we are literally our own creators,
it’s incredible what we can manifest,
as cliche as that sounds,
see you are the Master of your own destiny,
you decide if you win or lose,
every morning is a new day,

every morning is a new chance to choose,
don’t let Yesterday’s regrets hold you back,

from Tomorrow’s potential goals,
get rid of any addiction you might have,
if that addiction doesn’t serve your soul,
see maybe reincarnation is real,

or maybe it’s not I don’t know
either way you’re definitely alive right now,
& right now this life light is all you’ve got so let it show,
THH3 164 ∆
this life is yours so live your life,
after all that’s why they call it living,
& give thanks before every meal,
as if every meal is Thanksgiving,
& no I didn’t mean any disrespect in line by not being PC,
to any living or deceased Native American Indians,
see I have a saying,

if you don’t thank God for your blessings,
then you’ll soon have no more blessings,
to thank God for,
so give thanks,
not only to God but to your friends,
& not only to your friends,
but also to your self,
stay focused,
be true,
come & go in peace & remember my only piece of advice is,
that everything ultimately it all up to you,
so what are you going to do,

what choices are you going to make,
are you going to be one of the Real Ones that shines,
or are you just going to be another on of the Fronting Fakes,
THH3 165 ∆
choose wisely,
& above all be good to all beings, including yourself & others,
give thanks nightly,
& remember to rest well, get at least 7to 9 hours,
I mean it varies so remember to listen to your body,

& get as much sleep as you need,
so you can awake refreshed,
all this & oh yea, pay attention to your dreams,
finally,
let go of all regrets & the associated stress they bring,
so you can wake,

stretch,
give thanks,
& stay blessed,
yoga is a daily meditation, it always defeats a head depression,

so clear your head & do a few yoga poses, go ahead,
you don’t have to meditate for 90 minutes every day,

even just a few minutes helps in so many ways,
your body is your temple, honor it accordingly,

it’s important to support it tune in & respect yourself faithfully.
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 166 ∆
Steven Spielberg [40]
Told we’re not supposed to call it ‘The 3rd World’ anymore,

that the politically correct term is “Developing World”,
It’s not 1st & 2nd World,
it’s Developed & Developing world,
I thought,
what difference does it make,
the same disparities still exist,
regardless of if the names change the problems still remain,
when did Amazon.com replace the Amazon basin,
& how many acres of Amazon rainforest burned just today,
& how many voluntarily ignore this environmental atrocity,
too busy selfishly ordering items off of Amazon & Ebay,
meanwhile, in other news, we choose to ignore the news,

priorities all screwed up that’s why more attention is paid,
to Kardashian’s latest fashions & NFL action,
than to the disparities & crises that continue to remain,
regardless if the crisis is humanitarian or environmental,

most of us could care less to us it’s all the same,
from the Congo, Sudan, Somalia, Afghanistan & Yemen,
to Ethiopia, Nigeria, Syria, Venezuela, whatever the name,
we’re quick to look down on a 3rd world mob boss,

because he executes a few troops to make a statement plain,
THH3 167 ∆
but who are we to judge if you ask me all humans are fckt up,
& at the end of the day nothing really matters anyways,
we’re all Lethargic Aggressively Passive Agitators,

we’d all rather get lost in our Instagram Timeline,
than get found in our Real Life’s Timeline,
Beast of Burdens are disguised as Beauties that’re benign,
while United Nations’ scientists try to sound the alarm,

saying we’ve only got a decade to get things right,
otherwise there will be an environmental catastrophe,
the kind where no one can run & there’s nowhere to hide,
the likes of which the world has never seen, is irreversible,
& it’s effects affect everyone equally worldwide,
regardless of one’s fund, or political connects, so in effect,
our collective neglect’s leading to global environmental suicide,
anyways, whatever, enough of that, where am I now,

I’m flying through the sky on an Air New Zealand flight,
watching a documentary about Spielberg,
& his phenomenal rise in the film industry,
& how some critics pointed to his rise as the demise,
of real cinematographic art being distributed globally,
but the fact is critics are just critics they get paid to criticize,
& that’s exactly why most us artistic types would argue,
that on the contrary everything is art nothing is excluded,
every scene seen on screen as well as every real life scene too
THH3 168 ∆
only difference is with real life it feels like there’s no break time,
that everyone’s forgotten their lines & there’s no script,
& the camera is always rolling, the director never yells cut,
& even when fed up can’t just walk of the set & call it quits,
what the heck is this,

what kind of sick joke is someone playing,
I mean don’t get me wrong I’ve got a great life,
I’m not complaining at all I’m just saying,
it feels like we’re not only forced to watch this odd comedy,
but compelled to participate in this peculiar musical as well,
in the front row with Coke feeling awkward gnawing popcorn,
watching cop porn taking notes like Malcolm Gladwell,
‘Talking To Strangers’ plotting our swan song for the encore,
all in but not attached to the outcome at all,
this mind of ours has some dark places,

everyone scared of sacred water because of Jaws,
perception altered it sparked a fear that lead to the slaughter,
of the majestic prehistoric fish known as the shark,
the fact is sharks only kill approximately 6 humans a year,
while humans kill approximately 100 million sharks,
so who’s the real Predator here, don’t say Arnold,
armed running wild alarmed in this Jurassic Park after dark,
& that’s just the tip of the iceberg with Spielberg,

think of how many other ways he’s altered all our perceptions,
THH3 169 ∆
with his films about aliens, wars & natives,
with his portrayals of projections of possible misconceptions,
for example, did you know Jurassic Park came out in 1993,
then just 3 years later in 1996 the first animal was cloned,
see it’s all related from Dolly Parton to Keith’s Dolly the Sheep,
from InGen’s Velociraptors to CRISPR’s genomes,
yeah think about all that, or don’t think about it at all,

just turn off the lights, turn on a screen, & watch a show,
that way you don’t have to overthink anything, besides,
most of us don’t realize the movie’s over until the credits roll,
oh no,
here we go,
another poem about things we should but don’t find important,
like life, it’s disparities, & the re-programming of our souls,
it’s gross when a single movie grosses more,

than an entire country’s annual gross,
from Tomb Raider to Raiders of the Lost Ark, for centuries,
Westerners have been willing to do anything gold,
I’ve a not so sneaking suspicion we’re being controlled,

most done sublimely which would explain why E.T.,
& Poltergeist were made at the same time,
& even considered kinda the same movie,
that’s why Steven Spielberg was quoted as saying,
THH3 170 ∆
Poltergeist represents nightmares & E.T. represents dreams,
but oh well, what does any of that matter anyways,

if life is but a dream & we are lost at sea on a boat, I mean,
we’re all gonna die at least in the physical sense anyways,
& I don’t know if that’s true but it’s what’s been told to me,
then again I’ve been told a lot of things,

got me thinking someone isn’t wise just because they’re old,
so I take all food for my soul with a grain of salt,
because something isn’t true just because it was told,
Told we’re not supposed to call it ‘The 3rd World’ anymore,

that the politically correct term is “Developing World”,
It’s not 1st & 2nd World,
it’s Developed & Developing world,
I thought,
what difference does it make,
the same disparities still exist,
regardless of if the names change the problems still remain,
when did Amazon.com replace the Amazon basin,
& how many acres of Amazon rainforest burned just today,
& how many voluntarily ignore this environmental atrocity,
too busy selfishly ordering items off of Amazon & Ebay…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 171 ∆
Still So Emo [41]
I know, I'm too old to be emo,

I know I’m often overly emotional,
but fck it, I'm not hiding my emotions for those I don’t know,
I mean I still feel things so I still start sentences with "I feel..”,
yeah I still feel,

so what, sue me, I’m still human,
& I know most of the world has become emotionless clones,
but what about you fam?
Yeah, I still feel, so what?
I'm not going to apologize for being human,

not going to apologize for not apologizing, alright,
I mean yeah I know most of humanity’s going emotionally blind,
but I’ve never been one to go quietly into the night,
so I’m not going anywhere without a fight,
& I’m not embarrassed by my empathy so I’m not going to hide,
plus it’s not like I’m as bad as that fat old bald guy at the club,
in a blue polo shirt, plaid shorts, a ball cap that reads Pug Life,
a hairy chest, & a couple of cliche tattoos on his arm,
sipping an over iced mai tai, yeah you know the type,
& that type’s not me, don’t even go to clubs so you know what,
I’m definitely not even gonna try to hide what goes on inside,
defiantly I will display all my sensitivities indiscriminately,
this chaotic inner orchestra plays inside my mind at all times,
THH3 172 ∆
can barely keep calm in public, fck it the whole world's on fire,
& I see it all from my house on the summit’s hidden hillside,
in my love nest with a Bohemian Waxwing bohemian waxing,
just above Sunset tucked in The Summit off Mulholland Dr.,
we’ve got our own thing going on up here,
so why would we care what’s going on outside,
took a Ticket to Ride got motion sickness think I might vomit,

Hey Jude don’t mean to be rude but if I’m being honest,
The Beatles are all roaches, & I’m getting nauseous,
sick of the nonsense I think I’ll start a nonprofit,
hope I didn't offend you with anything I wrote, it’s just,

I’m frigid as an Arctic Fox is, standoffish as a rhinoceros,
overly cautious as a Pinocchio frog is, guarded as a hedgehog,
awkward as a bombed sloth is riding bareback on Sonic,
but still finding the courage to express myself as an artist,

even if I'm too old to be emo & often overly emotional,
fck it, I'm not hiding my emotions for those I don’t know,
I mean I still feel things so I still start sentences with "I feel..”,
yeah I still feel,

so what, sue me, I’m still human,
& I know most of the world has become emotionless clones,
but what about you fam?…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 173 ∆
Still Running [42]
She’s still running,

so I shouldn’t be startled that when I offer her my home,
as a place to relax rest decompress & unpack,
she doesn’t even stay long enough to hang up her clothes,
I suppose, we’ve all gotta find our way on our own,

I suppose, not every place we lay our head is our home,
in The Zone,
can’t answer my phone I’ve silenced my ring tone,
in Do Not Disturb mode, don’t know where it started,
or when it will end, but I do know I’m totally alone,
she said she just wanted a friend,

someone she could feel comfortable enough to chill with,
but I betrayed her trust because I’m just a Man in Lust,
instead of just a friend I touched her like her drunk uncle did,
I’m sick,
didn’t go so far as to attempt to put anything in,
but I did cross an undefined line,
when I got turned on after only holding her hand,
damn, what happened to our plans,

damn, what happened to those Happily Ever After style ends,
THH3 174 ∆
what ever happened to functional,
why do we have to all grow up so fckt up,
when well we find a place where we can heal,
where we can feel comfortable enough to just be ourselves,
don’t want her to have to feel guarded,

so much so she retracts shut,
don’t want me to have to feel awkward,
just because I find here attractive & take action,
who will help you,

who will help me, who will help us,
provide enough guidance along the way to guide us,
so that we grow up properly & don’t grow up fckt up,
I’m torn up,

I know exactly how she feels,
because I was taken advantage of as a kid too,
so I know exactly how badly she wants to heal,
but you can’t heal a wound, if you don’t open it up,

& she’s still busy running from her pain, covering up her cuts,
& this is exactly why, when I started to cry,

she began to get scared, & decided to take flight,
because she thought I was becoming,
exact what she feared the most,
which is an unstable person,
THH3 175 ∆
that can not offer her unwavering stable support,
so she left,
without closure,
& I messaged her,
once I’d gained my composure,
I apologized for being so emotional,
& for not communicating with her clearly,
I wrote her & told her I’d do anything to see her again,
I wrote her & told her that I missed her dearly,
she wrote back saying I could meet her at the airport,

to say one last goodbye,
but asked me not to ask her to come back if I came,
because she wasn’t changing her mind,
I immediately agreed,
& asked her what time her flight was,
9:45 at LAX,
which was exactly when & where my flight was,
so we met at the airport,

& had a soul to soul before we had to go,
you know the kind of heart warming conversation,
that simply can not be had over a phone,
I apologized, for not being the man then that I was now,
& told her, if she came back I’d be willing to take that vow,
but I did’t ask her to come back,
THH3 176 ∆
because she’d made me promise not to,
she smiled,
saying we’d only known each other for a few days,
I smiled,
& replied when it comes to Love time doesn’t matter anyways,
anyways, we said our farewells, both heading to our gates,

& I watched her disappear up the stairs,
then I went to check in for my flight,
because I too was ready to get out of there,
& wouldn’t you know it, in a not so simple twist of fate,

turned out my flight & her’s were departing the same gate,
31A & 31B, this must be destiny,

so there we were with each other again, just her & me,
& this is when she told me,

as the salty water began to appear in the windows to her soul,
that when I’d called her to invite her to California,
she thought she’d finally found a place to feel comfortable,
how she’s been in this cycle,
of meeting & being with men that made her feel unstable,
& had been trying to escape this cycle for awhile,
& how even escaping this cycle had become a cycle,
& I knew she’d been in this cycle ever since her drunk uncle,
THH3 177 ∆
& I knew that even though I’d improved,
& could provide the stability she craved,
it was too late, she’d already made up her mind,
already gone away, to probably repeat the same mistakes,
because she’s not going to get rid of the issue,
until it’s faced,
& she’s not going to be able to face her issues,
if she just keeps running away,
& I could have been the one to see her through,

to be her truth, heal her & she could have healed me too,
but instead I just became emotionally unstable,
lusted after her & pushed her away until she flew the coup,
& that hurts me worse than almost anything has ever,

because I realized I’d betrayed her trust in the worst way,
all she needed was a true friend, a platonic lover,
not a chronic luster that she didn’t love & couldn’t behave,
& then after she said all she had to say,

I watched her walk away, for the 3rd time in as many of days,
& even though she walked,
we both knew what she was really doing was running away.
She’s still running…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 178 ∆
Story of O.J. (Shawn Carter) [43]
Can’t shed the skin you’re in,

can’t change the way you were born,
because all the money in the world,
can change the color of the skin that’s worn,
doesn’t matter the quality of the clothes you wear,

doesn’t matter if you try to blind them with your diamonds,
you can’t escape yourself no matter what,
no ifs &s or buts no fibs dibs or fronts,
all lion no lyin,
for real,
I’ll tell you the deal,
all those bottles you use to medicate,
aren’t gonna help you heal,
all that time you spend in the club,

is time that gets stolen,
tell me this, how much have you spent on real gold,
verse how much you've spent on bottles that are golden,
how much time have you lost & at what cost,

if you have a boss & he pays you a wage you are still a slave,
even if you are paid a lot especially if that money you’re paid,
is just used to fund drugs & guns & to put yourself on display,
THH3 179 ∆
because if that’s the case then you’re not paying for freedom,
you’re just paying to remain a slave,
literally throwing dollars away one by one in a strip club,

on girls with fake tits showing you fake love,
you gotta know if you go broke no hoe’s gonna show up,
can’t make up or take back time wasted on basics in makeup,
bro, grow up, sober up, go home & hung your mother,
& while you’re home buy something of worth for your brother,
& when I say buy something of worth, I’m not talking clothes,
I’m not talking gold bottles, I’m talking property & actual gold,
I’m talking about something that’ll last,

something real like real estate that comes with a deed,
because money is nothing it’s just paper,
unless you turn it into something real like real property,
probably could’ve bought a house,

& put a roof over the heads of the whole hood,
instead of wasting it in a dark club,
trying to hide from God with designer glasses & a black hood,
but you can’t hide from yourself no matter have thick the tint,
can’t shed the skin you’re in,

can’t change the way you were born,
THH3 180 ∆
because all the money in the world,
can’t change the color of the skin that’s worn,
where are you goin’,

what are you doing,
what legacy are you leaving,
for motivating future generations into pursuing,
seriously,
what are you doing?
Do something that matters,

take actions that will last,
so that when you’re old & wrinkled,
you can look back with satisfaction at the actions in your past,
because it’s not how much money you make that matters,
it’s how much money you give back,
& that last line is important,
so I’m going to repeat that fact,
it’s not how much money you make that matters,

it’s how much money you give back,
wanna know what the difference between rich & wealthy is,
rich is only temporary while true wealth really last,
truth wealth bridges the generational gap,
& assists in healing wounds inflicted from the past,
THH3 181 ∆
what are you going to give to your kids?
A bunch of empty bottles & broken memories,

a bunch of broken bottles & empty memories,
or books of knowledge, priceless artworks, bank accounts,
& a house on acres of land with spring water & fruit trees?
I’ll ask you one time more,

as more of warning than a question,
what will you leave behind when you die,
to live on as your living legacy?
What do you want the tombstone to read,

on your grave when it’s placed at the cemetery?
What will it be that the future sees,

when they look back on this generation,
that the descendants of slaves who are descendants of kings,
did nothing to help, or that they helped to fix this situation?
What are you doing to help fix this broken situation?
Can’t shed the skin you’re in or change the way you’re born,
but you can change the future’s course & make a difference…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 182 ∆
Strengthening [44]
Who,
hurt you,
so bad,
that you haven’t let yourself heal,
& why,
do you,
let them,
continue to hurt you?
Why,
are you,
hiding in your shell,
you are not a shellfish,
here,
have, a well wish,
I wish,
you realize,
that you are stronger,
than any memory that you may have,
than any person that’s ever hurt you in the past,
than the darkness that’s invaded your light,
THH3 183 ∆
What a paradox you can often be,
one minute so outgoing the next minute totally shut off,
refusing dialogue not caring if you die at all,
on a walk in a park after dark communications shut down,
well you know what love, you’re too resolute,
to let let downs let you down,
I see you,
I see your struggles, I see your strengths,
I see that you are so close, to having a life altering epiphany,
I see it even if you don’t let me propose this question,
do you think a caterpillar knows as it grows,
that it’s about to metamorphosize into a beautiful butterfly?
See you might not see you, but I see you,

I see that you are so close, to having a life altering epiphany,
& breaking totally free, but you know what,
you don’t have to break to be free, you already are free,
you just have to realize it, & once you do, which you will,
you will see, no one can hurt you, not even you,
because you are a being, of such astounding strength,
that you’re just beginning to understand how strong you are,
so who cares who hurt you so bad you haven’t healed,

because from now on you will let no one ever hurt you again.
Remember that…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 184 ∆
Stupid Cupid (Love Hurts) [45]
Yeah, Love hurts,

yeah, Cupid can be such a nefariously obnoxious bastard,
mainly when he shoots his arrow penetrating your defenses,
hits his mark & stings your heart as it punctures,
& the hurt is intense & the affects upset for sure,
but even then it’s still better than the rest of this nonsense,
I am honest,
when I say that people fear love,
I mean what the fck that feels backwards to say,
especially since there’s nothing to fear especially not love,
not even Death, I’ve seen Death, it’s nothing to be afraid of,
especially when, it’s barely disguised as a desperate guy,
with a rusty gun to my temple acting desperate & mental,
metal bullets in the chamber man full of anger & ultrahigh,
it’s still nothing to be afraid of, that’s why I wasn’t scared,
felt no danger at all, fear is after all only relative,
most fears are made up of fake stuff,
that’s what nightmares are made of,
no fear resides here only love,
& love is What Dreams Are Made Of,
no Hilary Duff was in this scene though,
just some jittery punk acting macho,
I told him “If you’re going to pull the trigger then go for it,
THH3 185 ∆
I’m not scared to go I’m good with God so it’s your decision,
I’ve still got love for you no matter what you choose to do,
so just relax or blast & spend the rest of your life in prison.”,
with that he looked at me perplexed, took a breath,
became more scared than me & fled that instant,
so if Death is nothing to fear,
then Love certainly isn’t either that’s a given,
I find it interesting that she says she fears love,

because honestly that’s the one thing you don’t need to fear,
at the end of the day at the end of life,
love will be all that ever mattered,
fck what you wear, fck where you go, fck who you do,
fck money, fck status, fck fear, fck foes,
Hate is the disease Love is the cure, I swear to God,
fear is a sickness, I refuse to be infected,

so when she tells me she’s scared to love too much,
& that’s why she doesn’t want to see me, I don’t feel rejected,
nor do I feel disrespected, nor respected, nor neglected,
nor accepted, actually I don’t feel anything, I just accept it,
because that’s exactly how my conditioning is set up.
I swear it seems like there’s a conspiracy,

that’s making us lovers not love anymore,
because just when you think you’ve found someone to trust,
THH3 186 ∆
they leave you all alone cast in doubt curled up on the floor,
in the fetal position wishin’ they’d never appeared, or,
you do the same thing to them without even seeing it occur.
Maybe Cupid has devil horns,

maybe he is more demon than angel,
maybe he has two sides just like the rest of us,
maybe it might be better to be alone than be entangled,
maybe love isn’t all it’s cracked up to be, maybe it’s just a fable,
but maybe only love is real & everything else is an illusion,

maybe love is liberation maybe it’s the relinquishing of all fears,
maybe love is the opposite of entangled,
maybe love is within us so maybe true love is right here,
here,
in this heart of mine,
but if true love is all that matters,
then why does it hurt so much all the time,
Yeah, Love hurts,

yeah, Cupid can be such a nefariously obnoxious bastard,
mainly when he shoots his arrow penetrating your defenses,
hits his mark & stings your heart as it punctures,
& the hurt is intense & the affects upset for sure,
but even then it’s still better than the rest of this nonsense…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 187 ∆
Such A Beautiful Proposal (Izzy Is) [46]
She’s so beautiful,
she’s such a Passion Magnet,
that even though I know she can not be owned,
I still want to call her my own so anytime I want I can have it,
so precious our time together is,

that I don’t take a moment for granted,
still she’s so humble,

that even though she is all powerful she doesn’t know it,
she’s the most modest Hottest Goddess I’ve ever witnessed,
so when she let’s me in I take the chance & hope I don’t blow it,
she’s everything I’ve ever wanted, best love I’ve ever made,
if she’d accept my proposal, I’d propose to her this very today,
I’d get on my knees & ask for her hand with a ring,
I’d give her my word, give her her space, & I’d give up the game,
but none of the what ifs that may happen after even matter,
because when we’re together everything else vanishes,
these words become unheard irrelevant meaningless chatter,
we become a phenomenon of amorous rapturous happiness,
whereupon all our wrongs are gone. the only song is laughter,
& all that exists is an ambience of virtuous everlasting bliss,
as her seas swell she yells,

flooding the lands of this one man island,
THH3 188 ∆
going off without a pause she digs in her claws,
shivering gleefully delivering repeatedly oceanic orgasms,
& as she does I let go & give up my whole self as an offering,
I let her have her way with me, we literally make love for hours,
uncensored, this is not for amateurs or minors,
this is grown & sexy pheromones exercising exciting instincts,
this is not for idiots or cowards,
it takes courage & strength,
to let yourself be so open & vulnerable,
& after the session is done I propose to her,
“Fck it run away with me, let’s go all the way,

let’s create our own world where we are untouchable,
I’ve got the funds to pay if you’re ready to run away,
seriously lets create our own kingdom it’ll be wonderful.”,
to this she turned to me & in our post-sex sweat she said,

“But Aaron we just met I’m not so sure I mean I don’t know.”,
to which I said, “Izzy I get it but please trust your self,

take a few moments to meditate on it & listen to your soul,
let us hold onto these moments of bliss together,
& let’s let everything else just go.”…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 189 ∆
Suicidal Narcisist [47]
Fck you, fck you for killing yourself,

seriously, I’m so upset, why do you get to leave,
why do you get to escape your pains & regrets,
instead of staying here to help me get through mine,
how can you leave me here,

with all these miseries, without you to talk to,
how can you leave me here,
with all these burdens, to bear on my own,
come on, what the fck, you’re such a selfish egocentric,

never even considered the pain you’d leave behind in all of us,
that’s why when anyone speaks of you with any sympathy,
I speak up just to tell them to shut the fck up!
Fck You!
I absolutely hate that I completely love you.
I can’t believe you left me, can’t believe you left us all,
you’re a coward, a fraud, you don’t deserve to go so soon,
you should still be here with the rest of us,
collectively trying to figure it all out,
living in this Samsara,

going through these dramas,
THH3 190 ∆
how can you just take your own life,
leaving behind nothing but memories & post shock trauma,
I mean we’re all a bit tortured in this life we live,

but it doesn’t mean it’s right to just abort it,
can’t you see that the one’s you hurt the most,
are the one’s that love you the most is that not important?
I mean how could you be so selfish as to do such a thing,

I mean we’re as depressed as you but suicide just isn’t cool,
don’t you know we stay alive not for ourselves,
but for those that love us that’s why suicide just isn’t the move,
I mean it’s literally thee most narcissistic thing you could do.
Now you’re gone forever,

& all you did by ending it was hurt those that loved you most,
plus even if by some miracle I do see you again here,
how the fck am I supposed to hug a ghost?
Fck,
fck fck fck,
I fckn love you but I hate what you’ve done,
why’d you do such a stupid & selfish thing?
Reminds me of that one time when we were young,

& you ran across the freeway at night,
or that time you drank & drove,
THH3 191 ∆
hysterically laughing every time you crossed the center line,
you crossed all the lines, except the most important one,
where when you take your life you also take mine,
remember the time, when we were kids growing up,

sneaking outside, drinking too much & throwing it up,
now your gone & I regret & despise what you did so much,
that I’m hoping at your funeral, there’s no one showing up.
What the fck.
Look where we’re at now, you’ve gone off to “a better place”,

& I’m still stuck here, in this mess we’ve made,
& I’m screaming through these tears,

but no amount of shouts is going to bring you back,
& it hurts, it hurts more than can possibly be described,
& no one’s sympathies have any sort of soothing affect,
how could you leave me like this,

you must’ve never actually loved me,
at least not at much as you said you did, obviously,
if you had, you wouldn’t have, taken your life away from me,
& from your parents, & from your friends,

& from yourself, & fckn God damn!
To spite my arms I’ll cut off my hands,
THH3 192 ∆
so I can’t write these spiteful words anymore,
to spite my mouth I’ll cut out my tongue,
so I can’t speak my piece anymore,
cut out my throat, so I can join you,
& not have to disappoint anyone anymore,
to spite my love I’ll cut out my heart,
so I don’t have to feel anything for anyone anymore,
slit my wrist I’m sick of this, where’s the nearest exit,
I’m so sick of feelings, especially the feeling of being alone,
so sick of feeling feelings that sit in the pit of my stomach,
which is exactly what I’m now feeling now that you’ve gone,
you’ve gone,
& you left without even saying goodbye,
you’ve left me with nothing but regrets & fears,
& night terrors that come to me in the nighttime,
& remorseful mornings filled with mourning,
& unanswerable questions like “What if?” & “Why?”,
& even though you might have taken your own life,
you must realize that inside when you left I also died,
why, oh why, why did you have to be so fckn selfish,

leaving me here alone on this earth, feeling fed up & helpless,
fck this, fck you!

Fck you, fck you for killing yourself,
seriously, I’m so upset, why do you get to leave,
why do you get to escape your pains & regrets,
THH3 193 ∆
instead of staying here to help me get through mine,
how can you leave me here, with all these miseries,
without the one person who I could talk to,
which was you, how can you leave me here,
with these burdens, to bear on my own,
how can you leave me here alone like this?
Because even though you’re in a casket, I’m still here,

left bare with these burdens to bear that I’m buried in,
I’m the one that has to hold your mother when she grieves,
I’m the one that has to wear this cross & continue to carry it,
I’m the one that has to stay strong,

when our friends break down & get depressed.
You’re such a coward,
so no, no sympathy from me for what you did,

such a selfish act to commit, why would I forgive a narcissist,
I’m still hurt & upset, I’m not ready to forgive & I’ll never forget,
gonna take a long time before what you did finds forgiveness,
you’re such a coward,
didn’t even have enough courage before you did it,
to look me in the eyes, say goodbye & hug me one last time,
before you took your life away & my heart away along with it..
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 194 ∆
Sunday Fundays [48]
Louis Martini cabernets,

two pools with bikini clad babes making waves,
the newest actors acting amazed plotting the next craze,
producers sipping martinis choosing who’s careers get made,
dudes who make dreams come true like genies every day,
under palm tree shade at one of Beverly Hills hottest estates,
who’s who music movers making deals & beats on the spot,
as we move through to connect the dots like K. Dot,
this is that Good Life, all fact, no fiction,

that’s right, out back with New Edition & some new additions,
passing the light like Sean Paul got it all & then some,
our appetite for delights is satisfied by fulfilling visions,
powerful enough to also satisfy an appetite for destruction,

don’t have that craving for killing but still have that option,
do the math, add it up, we add adds, it’s a simple equation,

abundance multiplies exponentially, triumph at every occasion,
laughing all the way to the bank LMFAO we’re elated,
Redfoo is here with his big hair every move’s an exclamation,
every day’s a celebration, celebrating with The Weeknd,

it’s just another weekend at a mansion on Ambassador Ave.,
lads in bands out here with entertainment industry insiders,
THH3 195 ∆
crowds partying loud jacuzzi bubble baths Louis Martini cabs,
Lyft cabs, gift bags,

kickbacks, flip cash,
quick pass, flick ash,
big yams, kids crash,
who’s that, isn’t he,

in that, one band?
Hotel boutique,
nice pad, can I crash?
Day of the week,

I don’t know that,
all I know is everyday is Funday,
in slow motion moving forward quite fast,
cabs,
pinots,
beehives,
& c-notes,
real high,
Casino,
who’s that old guy,
oh that’s Robby De Niro,
THH3 196 ∆
bright lights long nights,
all stars anti-heroes,
poets & weirdos,

Sunday’s Funday,
front row at the catwalk,
slo motion sippin’ champie on the runway,
this whole world is a theatre,

I’m not trippin’ on Broadway, I’m livin’ on God’s way,
can’t trip when whippin’ fly in a two seater,
no golf no par 4 got a bro named Jorge no foreplay,
no fakes no bores got horses no hay no horseplay,

no false prophets all real profit please pour more cabernet,
Louis Martini cabernets,

two pools with bikini clad babes making waves,
the newest actors acting amazed plotting the next craze,
producers sipping martinis choosing who’s careers get made,
dudes who make dreams come true like genies every day,
under palm tree shade at one of Beverly Hills hottest estates,
who’s who music movers making deals & beats on the spot,
as we move through to connect the dots like K. Dot…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 197 ∆
Sunglasses, Bathrobes, & Sarongs [49]
Posted in a garden restaurant,

at my villa chillin’ with a charming babe,
overlooking all of Sayan Ridge in Bali,
haven’t got it all figured yet but I have got it made,
trying to be productive, letting things be what they may,

taking in the moments, & taking things one day at a time,
wanting to fill my moments with eventful creations,
& other materialized miracles that’ll last a lifetime,
trying to find the meaning, in all of this nonsense,

wishing I had some relief, from these people & all their stress,
what’s left, once the hope is gone,

& we’re standing on a chair, neck bare where a rope is on,
& all we want, is someone to say they care,

to tell us they feel our pain, see our struggles & are aware,
where, have, we, gone, we don’t know, where we are,

all we know, is we’ve gone way too far,
out there exposed,

nothing but some sunglasses & a bathrobe style sarong on,
on the ride of a lifetime that we can’t get off until we die,
but I guess that’s just the way it goes so I keep it moving along,
THH3 198 ∆
nothing but some sunglasses & a bathrobe style sarong on,
still battling depression but feeling great,
a lot on my mind but not a lot of time, things move too fast,
trying to fast for a cleanse, but still have a lot on my plate,
eating a bowl of dragonfruit with cashews & mango,
just trying to find a bit of peace in this mad world,
but she’s asking me so many questions,
that it’s starting to sound like an interview,
& I tell her please “Stop it.”,

seriously enough with the questions,
to which she gets offended & defends with,
“I’m only asking because I want to get to know you better.”,
ruffled, she gives me my space & starts to chase a dragonfly,

across the ridge then vanishes, well they all go eventually,
not surprised, can’t take a moment with any love for granted,
& I’m left alone once again to work on my masterpiece,
on that ridge, same old dance & song, nothing on,

but some sunglasses & a bathrobe style sarong,
posted in a garden restaurant,

at my villa chillin’ with a charming babe,
overlooking all of Sayan Ridge in Bali,
haven’t got it all figured yet but I have got it made…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 199 ∆
Tea With Yoda [50]
Having a Tea Ceremony,

with Yoda in a pagoda,
they say life’s a ladder,
He says it’s more like a totem,
trying to make ends meet for ends meat,

by exceeding expectations & meeting quotas,
trying to make my six senses see as clear as my mentor’s,

a Sensi with stressless sensibilities yet infinite responsibilities,
He’s a mature mixture of past scriptures & vast futures,
the perfect fusion to provide ideal solutions effectively,
to dispel all of the confusing illusions that currently occur,
so that my six senses can make sense of it & see clearly,
& that’s exactly why I’m grateful He’s my mentor,
I clear my mind when I enter his temple & listen attentively,
He’s Mr. Miyagi, Professor X, Stephen Miles, Morpheus,

Gandalf, Splinter, & Obi Wan, all rolled in one,
His composition is awesome so when taking lessons,
I make sure to be free of all distractions going on,
attempting to not take meetings yet people keep calling,

but phone’s off so I don’t see nor take note of the notifications,
I just go off like a boat on the edge of Niagara with no motor,
got expense taste life’s great though no time to be wasting,
THH3 200 ∆
gotta find a way to keep speed without delay & without haste,
because patience is key but time won’t wait,
so I stay totally outta touch with the clubs & the whole scene,
so focused I don’t even notice those overblown cokeheads,
light so bright that I’m always getting it in even when I go out,
light always burns but never burns out even at it’s lowest,
heard them mention a question but didn’t return the gesture,
was unsure of their motives plus the question sounded loaded,
goin' all in outta control only thing I limit is my exposure,
on balance with my talents in a pair of New Balances,
meanwhile they’re still trying to gain their composure,
I swear to God I’m not a rock nor in a hard place,
but I do rock Ohms on mountain tops complete with boulders,
shout out to Colorado though I boast low key so no bravado,
soul sans ego, modest & honest like a Buffalo Soldier,
no need to buy game it’s already in the bag sewed close,
& I’m relaxed shoes off spine upright aligned in the Lotus,
having a Tea Ceremony, with Yoda in a pagoda,
having a Tea Ceremony, with Yoda in a pagoda,

they say life’s a ladder, He says it’s more like a totem,
trying to make ends meet for ends meat,
by exceeding expectations & meeting quotas…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 201 ∆
Teach Me How To Love [51]
Please, teach me how to love,

yeah I know, I’ll be the first to admit I’m a bit fckt up,
I can be somewhat stubborn, but I’ve got a lot of love to give,
so I’m ready to learn, if you’re willing to not give up,
ready, willing & able, & yeah I know I’ve got my walls up,
so I occasionally act abrasively defensive & irrational,
but please understand I’ve been hurt so bad in the past,
so many times before that I’m scared & apprehensive,
that’s why I instinctively push you away,

when really I only wish to pull you closer,
I’m irrational, I’m lost, I’m confused, I’ve gone astray,
left home so long ago I can’t recall, raised without a mother,
that’s why I mostly fck those I’m disgusted with,

but often ignore those that I’m in love with,
& I’m not a bad guy I’m just hurt & it shows,
wounded, tired & sick of being fckt with,
so I often go off alone where I can’t be reached by phone,

a rarely cooperative rebel who’s cause is mostly unknown,
retreating to jungle retreats where it’s just me & the trees,
hiding in places I can reside in peace & write these poems,
somewhere unbeknown,
THH3 202 ∆
currently that place is Colombia, I’m sad but it’s beautiful,
the rain on the rainforest's canopy plays the only music notes,
just swan dove & swam nude in an infinity pool with a view,
in order to wash off my soul & let everything I came with go,
& this feels like living in a surreal fairytale,

only thing missing in it is someone to share it with,
see the only time I feel gratified & relieved of my depression,
is when I’m in a magical place & have someone to share it with,
& that’s why I’m asking you,

please, teach me how to love,
for if you successfully do, I’ll be forever grateful to you,
as loyal & faithful as an adopted rescue dog pup,
so please, teach me how to love,

yeah I know, I’ll be the first to admit I’m a bit fckt up,
I can be somewhat stubborn, but I’ve got a lot of love to give,
so I’m ready to learn, if you’re willing to not give up…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 203 ∆
Teenage Instagram Models [52]
Gotta wash my socks,

just another random late night thought I’ve got,
that & I’d also like to return almost everything I’ve ever bought,
which is pretty much almost everything that I’ve brought,
but I can’t seem to retrieve the receipts, it seems they’re gone,
too far gone along on this trip, retreat’s no longer an option,
at this hotel in LA,
Chateau Marmont is what it’s called,

caught up in a moment of spiritual apathy,
don’t want to go out, I’m feeling a bit off,
so I’m online searching for a good time casually,
wanting nothing more in the world than a natural woman,
but still on Instagram messaging these sham girls,
oh yeah & it’s my birthday,
not that that matters now,
because all that means is that my timeline is littered,
with well wishes from friends that I don’t even know anymore,
all this plus I feel like a whore,

like I sold my soul for some plastic toys & crafted attention,
comfortably numb & now the only time I feel anything at all,
is when I get a message alert or not so honorable mention,
& I’m 30+,
THH3 204 ∆
but still posting pics as if I’m a Teenage Instagram Model,
still searching for some validation from strangers,
still not giving myself enough credit for who I am,
come on, do you honestly think those friends on Instagram,

will somehow magically become your Instafam,
or is it more you’re obsessed with those obsessed with you,
so you secretly send DMs insincerely to all your Instafans,
searching for love in all the wrong places,

face it you’re so overloaded with so many faces,
that you’ve become jaded & faded,
& all your idols have become faceless,
don’t even know who the flavor of the month is,
but I’ll bet whoever it is is tasteless & probably wasted,
a generic imitation of what Authentic Creation is made of,
& we’re losing patience still they say be patient & pace it,
but it’s harder to do it than say it, so it’s overly complicated,
because we’re nervous & anxious, with a focus on escaping,
like a psychology patient who artfully averts nurses’ sedations,
to improve his chances of escaping but it’s useless attempting,
because truthfully even though these gadgets can’t contain us,
still can’t escape ourselves, & that’s exactly where the pain is,
& the kicker is we could if we’d put our minds together,
but instead of exerting any effort together we just take it,
& now that that’s outta the way where does that leave us now,
now that everything’s been laid on the casino table,
THH3 205 ∆
here in at this place in time of unplanned acceptance,
between birth & death where we rest right in the middle,
no riddles,
yet everything feels like a mystery,
& I’ve got over 50 unread messages to reply to,
but I don’t want to reply to a single one of these,
I just want to log off & go climb on a tree,
I just want to get lost in the greens of it’s leaves,
I just want to feel something other than nothing,
I just want to not want any more things,
ah but as much as I try, I still do want wants, I do want things,

& right now one of my wants is to wash my socks,
because I’ve been living out of a backpack for way too long,
& people think I’m living it up but really this reality really sucks,
because I have no home & no friends,
a successful Self Isolationist that’s alone on his birthday,
writing all these words to you like you still care at all,
when in reality I doubt you ever even did in the first place,
anyways just forget it, I’ve gotta go wash my socks,

just another random late night thought I’ve got,
that & I’d also like to return almost everything I’ve ever bought,
which is pretty much almost everything that I’ve brought,
but I can’t seem to retrieve the receipts, it seems they’re gone,
too far gone along on this trip, retreat’s no longer an option…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 206 ∆
Teeter Totter [53]
Okay, so here we are again,

together & alone, on the run at home with nowhere to go,
defending ourselves with passively aggressive attacks,
the best defense is a good offense, we advance then retract,
online & off track, it was high time for a low jab,
so it makes sense she stole my whole mind, just like that,
no evidence left, no detective either, so no case to crack,
no Low Jack, so as much as I tried I couldn’t get it back,
now I’m on the low like a blacked out Cadillac,

if have a love, hold that, don’t let go, just grab hold & go fast,
head on, off the track, we crash, what a wreck,
nothing left but whiplash as a post crash affect,
& we’re way way way too far gone, to ever get anything back,
& I just want to go, back, back to where we were,
when we were here, together, alone concurrently,
separate but equal, on the run fervently at home offshore,
now I’m in the now, holding on to my phone, with no one to call,

checking the latest news but finding nothing new at all,
checking out the latest updates of people I don’t even know,
if I’m in such a rush all the time, why do I continue to stall?
In a hurry but just want to relax,
THH3 207 ∆
tension builds, as additions subtract,
& everything continues to continue,
to add additional additions to the facts,
fact is that we are perfect opposites,
which makes us exactly the same,
& yes we are completely crazy,
but these days crazy’s the only way to stay sane,
“..we’re never gonna survive unless we get a little crazy,”,

so we have to let loose if we want to stay sane & maintain,
don’t take my word for it just ask Seal or Heidi Klum,
it has begun, roll the drums, load the guns, light the flames,
it’s the world wide Olympic Flame relay,
might be some new players on the field,

but best believe it’s the same old game,
might be some new problems revealed,
but best believe it’s the same old blame,
don’t know where I’m going next, or even why I came,
here, to see you again,

my only friend in the world,
here, we are again, together & alone,
on the run at home with nowhere to go…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 208 ∆
Text Junkie [54]
What are you doing, sitting there with your addictions,

smoking drinking texting, staring at a tiny screen,
completely oblivious to everything else that exists,
please if you’d be so kind as to get the fck off your phone!
It seems you haven’t noticed that there’s a human here,

please be so kind as to acknowledge their presence,
please be so kind as to acknowledge how annoying it is,
to be on your phone while you’re sharing time with someone,
because when you’re on your phone all the time,
it’s like you’re not sharing any time with the person your with,
how incredibly unbelievably inconsiderate, seriously,
what kid of person would be so rude as to do this type of sh!t,
I mean, it’s one thing if you don’t like the person you’re with,
& you’re texting because you want to ignore them,
but if that’s the case then why are you there in the first place,
your actions show you obviously don’t care about them,
whether you realize enough to acknowledge it or not,
& if I’m wrong & you do care about the person you’re with,
you better realize that time spent texting is time that’s lost,
because if you’re on your phone,

while they’re trying to share time with you,
you better believe that they are going to leave you,
because nothing makes someone feel less important,
THH3 209 ∆
than being on your phone while you’re with them,
be with them or don’t, make up your mind,
either way get the fck off your phone,
or get the fck out of their life,
& if you don’t get off your phone when with them,
then don’t be surprised if when you finally realize,
what a waste of time spending excessive time on a phone is,
that you text them to apologize & they don’t reply,
because they’re likely spending time with someone in real life,
giving their attention to someone that pays attention to them,
that appreciates them & is really with them when with them,
isn’t dismissively paying attention to a phone instead of them,
can’t blame them for giving their attention to someone else,
cutting ties, because why would they continue to dedicate,
themselves, their time, & their attention,
to someone who doesn’t appreciate or reciprocate,
I’m warning you now so don’t be surprised,
when they finally decide to separate.
So I’ll ask you one last time, what are you doing?
Sitting there with your addictions,

smoking drinking texting, staring at a tiny screen,
completely oblivious to everything else that exists,
please if you’d be so kind as to get the fck off your phone!..
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 210 ∆
Text You Later [55]
I wanted to say something with some significance urgently,

but like usual, I just bit my tongue & swallowed my words,
washing my words down unwillingly with plural rounds,
of complimentary shots from the open bar,
she didn’t even notice, because, as usual she was,

stuck on her phone, serving it more than it served her,
I wanted to remind her urgently, that I was there,

that she was there as well, that we were there,
I wanted to remind her urgently, to remember the memories,
before they were permanently gone, & forgotten forever,
lost in the sands of time, stuffed in the depths of our minds,

gone like skeletons in closets, faded like colors in sunsets,
washed away like sand castles by the sea,
she was only ever there during sex,
only then would our souls connect & our eyes meet,
only then would she be present, without interference,
& our sex was the best, no debate, carnal yet caring,
physical yet spiritual, gentle yet rough, selfless yet selfish,
still as good as the sex was, I wanted more,

I wanted more of her, I wanted more of her there with me,
THH3 211 ∆
for I felt that all too familiar feeling of impermanence,
that this too would pass, as everything does,
that we too wouldn’t last & that time was our nemesis,
this gave me anxiety & anguish, so bad I wanted to speak up,
but I just clammed up, I bit my tongue, swallowed my words,
& swept all these underlying emotions under the rug,
see we were doing good, good enough to not make a scene,

or at least it seemed, & I didn’t wish to mess things up for us,
didn’t wish to arouse her inner child,

for that child was fierce, that child was a terror,
that child could be sweet but also bitter,
that child was sometimes a dream, but mostly a nightmare,
life is, sometimes a dream, but, mostly a nightmare,

so I didn’t make current waves, I just rode surfer waves,
as we rode in Uber cars, driven by newer slaves,
wanted nothing more for us than a way to escape,
wanted nothing more from her, nothing except her time,

how silly am I, to want the only thing that money can’t buy,
I wanted to say something with some significance urgently,

but like usual, I just bit my tongue & swallowed my words,
washing my words down unwillingly with plural rounds,
of complimentary shots from the open bar,
THH3 212 ∆
after a decent amount of time, maybe a few months,
I finally spoke, words which to this day I still regret,
words that would set in motion our end,
even though I didn’t know it yet,
I said,
“You love that phone more than you love me, so I’m leaving!”,
this sentence, like all the most hurtful sentences are,
was made up of a combination of truth, anger, & passion,
was made out of a sense of desperation, hatred, & love,
& I don’t know if you can actually witness a heartbreak,

but if you can, if you can witness & actually recognize it,
then I saw her heart break in that moment,
& it signified the beginning of our end catalyzing,
her heart broke for all the reasons a heart breaks,

she felt betrayed, attacked, misunderstood, & neglected,
she felt she had given me her everything & that I rejected it,
that I’d disrespected it & worst of all felt I didn’t detect it,
there were no tears, there was no explanations,

no reaction, no pleading, no reasoning,
there were only misinterpreted intentions for no reason,
& an escalation of arguments used as excuses for our abuses,
the truth is, I loved her,
THH3 213 ∆
more than any girl before, or any girl after,
but you know what they say,

you never really miss what you have until it’s gone,
you never really miss who you have until they’re gone,
you never get a chance to say goodbye once they’re gone,
“c’est la vie” life goes on, even when account’s overdrawn,

morally bankrupt, we broke up, as most couples eventually do,
going our separate ways with severed ties & broken hearts,
each of us holding separate parts of each other’s lies & truth.
We went cold turkey, no calls, no emails, no text.
We didn’t speak for months, still I thought about her every day.
It’s strange how close someone can feel,

even when they are so far away,
it’s strange how far someone can feel,
even when they are right there with you,
sometimes I feel closer to someone, when they are not there,
if you love someone let them go,
the heart only grows fonder with time,
& if they return some day you know that they’re there to stay.
One day, I don’t remember the exact day, I called her,

craving to hear her soft tones in my ears once more,
to my surprise she answered, “Who’s this?”
THH3 214 ∆
“It’s me.”, I replied to remind her,
there was a long pause,
“Oh, my Love, it’s been months!” she exclaimed excitedly,
months in this city can feel like years,
“So good to hear from you Babe, can I text you later?”,
the sentence didn’t make sense,
I didn’t desire another text conversation,
I desired to hear her voice, to see her face,
still, it had been months,
& I didn’t want to scare her off with overt emotions,
it’s a strange time when people are scared of love letters,
I wanted to tell her,
that time is passing faster than any of us realize,
that life is too short,
to not spend every living moment with someone you love,
that we should be celebrated as miracles,
not neglected as mistakes to be ignored,
I wanted to say something so bad, but like usual,
I just bit my tongue & swallowed my words,
reminding me of all those nights we’d spent at the bar,
so in order not to startle her I only said “Ok.”,
she said, “Thanks!”, & we both hung up our phones,
thinking she wouldn’t text back, & I’d again be left alone,
to my surprise, she called me that same night,

& confessed she loved my madly,
& that us being together in this world of wrong,
seemed like the only thing that felt right anymore,
THH3 215 ∆
so we made a plan, to have dinner the next day,
& every moment in anticipation, felt like forever to wait,
we were to meet at this little bistro on Sunset,

I arrived a bit early just in case & shot her a text,
she texted me back instantly saying she was on her way,
felt as eager sitting there as a high school kid on his first date,
to my shock & surprise she stood me up, at first I was upset,

until I learned that in her defense it wasn’t her fault,
see she’d died in a car crash on Crescent Heights & Sunset,
cause of death a text she was sending me before she crashed,
in that last moment, she’d sent me a text that was never sent,
& I later found out when I read it that this is what it said,
“Baby I love you, sorry I’m late, I’m on my way, see you soon.”.
& we’re still waiting,

but now the tables have turned,
now she’s waiting for me to get off my phone,
& come back home.
So I send this message to her in Heaven in hopes it’s received,

“Baby I love you, sorry I’m late, I’m on my way, see you soon.”..
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 216 ∆
Thanks & Praise (I’ll Eat Her Face) [56]
She’s so cute I wanna eat her face,

like I’m high on bath salts,
she’s vegan,
but still takes my tongue like a cannibal,
eat your hearts out Carnivorous Haters,

I’ll cut my ear off & send it to her like Van Gogh,
give her more roses than Travis Scott gave Kylie Jenner,
or that Joe DiMaggio gave Marilyn Monroe,
I’m just saying, I’m not playing, not at all, build her a Taj Mahal,
rip off a priceless painting, take her skating, & steal the show,
we’re wild untamable animals, unmanageable radicals,
fashionably unfathomable tangibles, all systems go,
all in all the time, Black Swan diving into the deep end,
head first no toes here goes, cannonball, “Geronimo!”,
the Heard Pied Piper, 3rd Eyed Viper,
the Venom & the Antidote,
& to quote a quote I wrote myself,
“She’s the answer to my prayers, the Reason & the Hope.”,
she’s the answer to my prayers, & I don’t even pray,

okay actually low-key I do pray in faith frequently,
& I’ve seen a lot of amazing things but I’m still amazed,
dazed hypnotized, her frequency makes a beautiful melody,
it’s music to my ears & eyes, I’m amazed it feels great,
THH3 217 ∆
but tomorrow isn’t promised today, time treats all equally,
tomorrow never comes so no delay, but she comes in waves,
& when she does I’m in a daze, honey glazed & lovely crazed,
my bed’s a mess haven’t made it I don’t know how many days,

bed’s a mess but when we’re together we’ve got it made,
so perfectly misbehaved it’s insane,
lost myself then found my self all up in her maze,
a labyrinth of thickets I’m flabbergasted like “what is this?”,
& usually I’m not religious, but I must give praise &say,
“Thank you Lord praise God Amen!”, her temple I worship,
giving thanks & praise to her existence, I say my grace,
committed I pledge allegiance to all here erogenous regions,
so delicious & nutritious, she does the dishes I clean her plate,
love the way she tastes plus she’s so cute I wanna eat her face,
She’s so cute I wanna eat her face,

like I’m high on bath salts,
she’s vegan,
but still takes my tongue like a cannibal…
Δ LaLux Δ
Venice, California, 2018
THH3 218 ∆
That 4:00am Feeling [57]
Just want to grab hold of something,

feeling clingy, stirring without going any particular direction,
maybe I’m confused from being used for others’ amusement,
maybe they betrayed my trust & left me lost in secession,
leaving impressions embossed on the walls of my fortress,
after they looted the halls, stole my secrets, & left undetected,
fled with the gems, left holes in my barricades & my defenses,
left me alone with only polluted perceptions & this depression,
but maybe that wasn’t their intention & I should forgive them,
maybe I was a student & they were here to teach me a lesson,
then again, maybe whatever it was, maybe I asked for it,
maybe Life’s a trip, & that’s why I always have my passport,
& maybe that’s why I write these words as a last resort,

a frontline 1st line of defense in the form of 1st person reports,
against a constantly felt but rarely seen malicious force,
that attacks, no remorse, in attempts to throw me off course,
& I feel the pressure from it’s evilish endeavors on my shores,
especially when out in public where there’s people in hoards,
but I stay steadfast as a Comanche on an Indian horse,
in the trees, in a forest, might be disliked but can’t be ignored,
we, ignore any ordinary ordinance,

we, are as explosive as any unexploded ordnance,
adamant about our refusal to submit or be their subordinates,
THH3 219 ∆
exactly why if you’re independent then I’m supporting it,
but at the same time as I strive for an independent existence,

I’m searching for other Life out there in this solo solar system,
that’s exactly why I’m out here reaching for someone to hold,
I’m strong yes also desperately in need of some assistance,
Just want to grab hold of something,

feeling clingy, stirring without going any particular direction,
maybe I’m confused from being used for others’ amusement,
maybe they betrayed my trust & left me lost in secession,
leaving impressions embossed on the walls of my fortress,
after they looted the halls, stole my secrets, & left undetected,
fled with the gems, left holes in my barricades & my defenses,
left me alone with only polluted perceptions & this depression,
but maybe that wasn’t their intention & I should forgive them,
maybe I was a student & they were here to teach me a lesson,
then again, maybe whatever it was, maybe I asked for it,
maybe Life’s a trip, & that’s why I always have my passport…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 220 ∆
That That Is (Mike Posner Vibes)
That feeling in your gut,

that tingle in your spine,
those goosebumps on skin,
that voice that speaks from inside,
that energy in the crowd,
that aura in the air,
that vibe,
that sense that there’s so much more out there,
though maybe nothing really matters,

& maybe that’s why no one seems to care,
wonder if that fact is depressing or liberating,
just admit it, does that fact fill you with hope or despair,
probably both,
like how Mike Posner says “Keep going!”, as he hits the road,
then half way across America gets bit by a baby rattlesnake,
gets an airlift, & has to learn to walk all over again from home.
Collective Existence is a Totalitarian Democracy,

there’s an all seeing Supreme Being but still you can vote,
the Coronary Donor is a Poetic Loner,
that honors the Moment by walking across the globe,
as he contemplates growing a beard like Mike Posner,

he writes composures as he goes forward down Life’s Road,
THH3 221 ∆
on the open road hoping for healing so he can have closure,
I Took A Pill In Ibiza & realized that I had to go,
craved a way to get away from himself,

then realized no matter where he went there he was,
that he could never escape himself so he had to accept himself,
not to show people who he is, but to find out who he’ll become,
embodiment of ‘seize the day’ embrace what you can’t escape,

realize no matter where you go there you are, right,
can never escape yourself, so you’ve got to accept yourself,
look within & you’ll find that true change happens from inside,
that why I advise you don’t ignore that feeling in your gut,
that tingling in your spine,
those goosebumps on you skin,
that voice that speaks from inside,
that energy in the crowd,
that aura in the air,
that vibe,
that sense that there’s so much more out there…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 222 ∆
The Basketball Diaries [59]
Losing my faith in humanity, not choosing to blame anybody,

nor point any fingers or throw any stones, because I know,
that I’m just as much a part of the problem as the next man,
here I’ll explain an example, it involves The Basketball Diaries.
Went to a scenester rooftop cinema show in Budapest,

met two beauteous girls with two pairs of beauteous breast,
excited to se me they invited me to have drinks in the VIP,
fed me cocktails & compliments until I was beyond content,
sufficiently under the influence of enough alcohol & estrogen,
to build my confidence up, borderline cocky but not arrogant,
exposing hidden sentiments & releasing all my cognizance,
like a young Leo in Don’s Plum uninhibited & unedited,
acting inappropriate with no etiquette & unaware of it,
yet as attractive to opposite sexes as romantic perfectionists,
it was a bit surreal, on that rooftop, with Leo on the big screen,
it’s strange to see someone on screen you know in real life,
Leo’s a cool guy, we’ve hung out a few times,

both of us trying to save the world, though it seems hopeless,
I once asked him if I could manage his island for him,
he laughed & said sure but it’s just a bunch of coconuts,
anyways there I was watching Leonardo DiCaprio,

play the starring role of a strung out poet,
THH3 223 ∆
the parallels are there, but my addiction is not heroin,
yes I’m strung out, but my drug of choice is estrogen,
so when the two girls in the VIP got closer & closer to me,
I fell deeper & deeper in love with each step,
because I love unconditionally without apologies,
& though I’ve had my heart broken before, I hold no regrets,
we went back to my place, I put a film on my projector screen,

almost had sex with the one I thought would be my girlfriend,
her friend interrupted, girl interrupted, boy interrupted,
her friend intervened, saying she wanted to have sex as well,
& usually in this situation I’d just initiate a threesome,
but I was so into the girl I was already with,
that I didn’t want to share her or us with her friend,
so we went back out, albeit reluctantly,
to a cliche club with a bunch of drunken tourists,
so my girl’s girl friend could attempt to get some random d!ck,
it was then I realized, as the two danced together,
trying to lure in a man, just to get him inside of them,
that humanity is truly lost, & a part of me died,
right there on that dance floor, under those flashing lights,
my heart fell & I felt numb once again.
See, I don’t want to find a girl to just fck for one night,
I don’t want another morning dawn goodbye,
I want mimosas with my lover at brunch the next day,
cuddles by day then long kisses by night under candlelight,
THH3 224 ∆
I’m a hopeless romantic, that’s what I get for being a poet,
feeling strung out like Leo, just searching for another fix,
just chasing that first high, that first real love,
but all I find out here these days, is b!tches that’re counterfeit,
going through heartbreak stages getting played along the way,

then writing it all down on the pages of my Basketball Diary,
fck it, I’m so done, I’m so over superficial relationships,

my life is too blessed, to mess with girls that couldn’t care less,
I’m so over it, maybe I should just become a monk,
renouncing all material possessions & physical passions,
I miss, humanity, it hurts witnessing it sparkle & fade,
as I add another piece of myself to this collective charade,
a piece of me died on that dance floor,

& I probably deserved the pain that it brought,
& you can call me naive or whatever,
but even after all that I still feel that not all hope is lost,
even though I’m losing my faith in humanity & myself as well,
& can’t seem to do anything except just helplessly watch it go,
losing my faith in humanity, not choosing to blame anybody,

nor point any fingers or throw any stones, because I know,
that I’m just as much a part of the problem as the next man,
here I’ll explain an example, it involves The Basketball Diaries..
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 225 ∆
The Dark Side of The Moon [60]
No one is in control,
there’s no Director behind the screen,
there’s no Wizard behind the curtain,
so no one can be certain what happens behind the scenes,
“Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain!”,

pay no attention to Dorthy dying at age 47,
Warner Brothers harmed & drugged her until she went under,
no wonder she finally OD’d on barbiturates in London,
The Underground’s got the upper hand & gets one wondering,
what are all the dark secrets that Hollywood holds,
what happens in the aftermath of acting auditions,
other than Judy Garland being abused at 16 years old,
well as far as the past, most will never know what happened,
because no one involved ever spoke up that we know of,
as for the present, that’s a different situation all together,
obviously a lot of other oddity atrocities probably occur,

but we’ll never know because most of those that know,
lack enough courage to speak up, so they go on unheard,
hidden in the plain sight of bright lights, cameras & actions,
I’m telling you, Harvey is just the tip of the iceberg,
just the tip, it’s a reference, symbolic like The Wizard of Oz is,
THH3 226 ∆
like how every story & every one has two sides,
take The Munchkins as one example,
they’d get belligerently drunk all hours of the day & night,
then hide away at their hotel to have orgies & gamble,
couple of the Munchkins were rumored to have raped Judy,
the Wicked Witch was actually burned on set several times,
the snow in the snow scene of the film was actually asbestos,
Tin Man was poisoned & several directors lost their minds,
makes sense then I guess,

that there’s a mashup between Wizard of Oz & Pink Floyd,
what’s it called, oh yeah ‘The Dark Side of The Moon’,
because no one knows what goes on on the other side,
no one knows how many animals & people have been abused,
how many people lost their lives or had their lives destroyed,
or how many barely survived,
or how the tiger in Life of Pi almost died,
or how many stars win awards,
but how a majority of those stars are almost exclusively white,
& let’s not forget what happens,

in the dark out of the limelight,
like the pedophilia of La Familia,
or Hollywood’s underworld mafia ties,
doesn’t need to be Halloween for actors to wear masks,
The Wizard of Oz was more than an allegory of the times,
it was an ominous warning a scary canary in a coal mine,
THH3 227 ∆
symbolic of filming in color after starting in black & white,
the lines between right & wrong surely blurs when,
trying to chase more lines & recite your lines at the same time,
& I’m from Hollywood so I guess I’m guilty just by association,
but I’m gifted so I resist the wicked with the words I write,
trying to write the right words to right these trite wrongs,
while trying to walk a straight-line at the same time,
because I’ve seen the light,

so I attempt to take control of the wheel with both hands,
& yeah I know no one can control the direction of this ride,
but we can try to keep everyone safe inside until it ends,
I know we’ve all gotta go so until we get there,

I’m trying to write it all out before I lose my entire life,
no one is in control, no one said life was fair,
& it’s almost the end, of the show, light’s out goodnight,
no one is in control,
there’s no Director behind the screen,
there’s no Wizard behind the curtain,
so no one can be certain what happens behind the scenes…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 228 ∆
The Greatest Love Story Never Told [61]
In this whirlwind life,

just trying to not Downward Spiral in a tailspin like NIN,
when desperation has a transformation into motivation,
it’s then depression turns into inspiration & we start sailing,
& even though, the odds are stacked against us,

we’ve had lots of practice, plus there’s a tailwind,
so don’t count us out just yet, we’ll take our chances,
roll the dice, deal the cards, ante up, we’re all in,
“All I need in this life of sin is me & my girlfriend.”,
our interactions were more than mere happenstance,

how’s she going to leave me before she’s even relaxed,
enough to at least stretch her wings & rest her bones,
& see if this is a place to call home instead of being homeless,
a sanctuary in this crazy world where she can safely unfurl,
remove her shoes, leave her stress at the door, come in & rest,
world’s off it’s axis, people partially enslaved by taxes,

death comes in matches, life’s light just flashes,
bad comes in batches, time continues to pass us,
she refuses to match up, as the world fractures I ask this,
“Will you give peace a chance & live with me in this breathe?”,
this isn’t arrogance this is the confidence I got when we met,
this is me with no pretense looking for a confidant,
THH3 229 ∆
because I’ve got some secrets that’re tired of being kept,
& it’s obvious when told in the context of this poem or read,
but honestly when read emotions are often taken outta context
no man feels like a man when his heart is torn out of his chest,
swear to God I had that knife pressed upon my wrist,

whatever it takes to wash away the pains of these regrets,
it’s as if we’re all lost in an innocence that’s getting intense,
hotter & higher the flames of the fire are making us sweat,
I feel sick, I feel great, I feel love, I feel hate,

I feel like this, is the greatest love story never made,
I feel like we’re the greatest love never made,
& this is the greatest love story never told,
because all of the gold in the world is worthless,
if you’ve got no one to spend it with because you’re all alone,
so Love, let me suggest just one last time, please come home,
what’s done is done, let’s start over, please come home,
see I know I’m losing you, in this whirlwind life,

losing ourselves, trying to not downward spiral in a tailspin,
I know it’s all beginning to blur & it’s getting hard to hold on,
just remember I love you even if you forget everything else,
because when desperation transformations into motivation,
it’s then depression turns into inspiration & we start sailing…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 230 ∆
The Hills Have Eyes [62]
Even though these hills have eyes, they can still feel real lonely,
when perceived from these crystal castles that we’ve built,
above plastic palm trees, these people can seem real phony,
when seeing the bogus smiles shown through their botox lips,
clasping the latest fashion handbag accessory,

having every material possession that’s any sign of wealth,
grasping at anything that adequately fakes actual authenticity,
slowly rolling Bugattis casually, got good credit but bad health,
possessing a staggering abundance of plush slush funds,
but lacking anything that has any real substance of self,
& I see it all so well, from my place up in the hills, that it’s felt,
it hurts because most only care about vanity & nothing else,
meanwhile back in my life I rise when the sun sets,

I get up with the dark moon feeling like a cartoon protagonist,
acting on set in a surreal scene out of tune & out of character
other actors are acting too, but they’re just talking sh!t,
over eager underachievers with with no directive or narrative,
these amateurs are irritating don’t know why I put up with it,
why’d I come down from my house in the hills,

I’ve got nothing to prove, the truth always comes to the light,
especially when everyone’s gone home, & I’m alone,
poolside view wide, just Me Myself & I,
THH3 231 ∆
I wish I had something extra epic to say here,
I want to change the world by writing the perfect verse,
hoping if I get my 10,000 hours in I’ll master my craft,
state the perfect fact & finally get the respect that I deserve,
& maybe, just maybe, by doing so I’ll be able to successfully,

change this world for the better before it gets any worse,
sure is cold up here, staring out this window with a view,

sure is cold in here, heart burning up inside trying to stay cool,
guess it’s all just point of view, even though my view is skewed,
as distorted as it might be, it still appears to be my truth,
& it’s got a beautiful view too, no pretendin' it’s tremendous,

here I write all my truth, to you, dedicated to these lifelines,
like Santiago in Hemingway’s The Old Man & The Sea,
till my sun sets in Sun Valley so tired been running for lifetimes
running & writing,

& writing, & writing, & writing, & writing,
trying, to create the cure for society’s ills,

like The Cancer Research Institute or AEBI in Israel,
replying, to fill, every lost soul that writes me their will,
lost souls, in these lost hills, that got everything except healed,
sand castles in the sand, wash away with waves & are rebuilt,
in a house on stilts, which sits on the hill where it was built,
THH3 232 ∆
in a room with a view, where I see everything except for myself,
stairs, ascend down, sun down, stare out, see the full town lit,
lazy lights twinkle,

like the fallen stars they hold,
success & failure both only a stone’s throw away,
so I suppose that’s just the way it goes,
bones, buried under this scorched earth,

infidels on Indian burial grounds,
deaths televised live with no attention paid to still births,
& yeah that’s the truth, & yeah the truth hurts,
but karma’s got a way of catching up with us no need to rush,
we all get what we deserve sooner or later for better or worse,
& since that’s the case I’m just going to stay here at my place,
in the hills where I hide from the world & I write my poetic will,
even though up here it sometimes gets so cold,
my heart feels like it’s froze, going to explode & I get the chills,
wondering if my death will go unnoticed if I die tonight,
but someone’s always watching in this city so I doubt it will,
see these hills have eyes, still they can still feel real lonely,
when perceived from these crystal castles that we’ve built,
above plastic palm trees, these people can seem real phony,
when seeing the bogus smiles shown through their botox lips…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 233 ∆
The Reckless Abandon of Actions In Love [63]
I think the main problem to blame is,

I’m always fallin’ instantly in love,
without restraint or reservation, I lose what I came with,
& embrace, whoever it is, like I’ve never been hurt before,
but I’m not the only one around here that’s a Believer,
a Dreamer, a Hopeful Romantic, an Unconditional Lover,
we both throw caution to the wind & go all in,

charging like Spartans with reckless abandon,
because we’re both on the ride of our life until we die,
& it’s a lonely road, so we don’t go solo, we ride tandem,
on a tangent,
writing lines on my laptop as my emotions run rampant,
in a parking lot outside a Sprouts on Santa Monica Blvd.,
typing vows like they might make some kind of difference,
woke up, restless, on the wrong side of the bed today,
welcomed back, to this Waking Life with tightness in my chest,
& this relentless feeling of eternal loneliness I can’t shake,
which has got me thinking, maybe some souls can’t be saved,
& maybe that’s why I’m now sitting in my car,
with tears in my eyes & nowhere to drive,
because there’s nowhere I want to go,
other than back to the one place where my love was denied,
THH3 234 ∆
the only place I want to go,
is back into the arms of the one that let me go,
but she’s so far gone memories seem like only dreams now,
even though I’m not dreaming, I’m wide awake, woke,
I feel so far away from her, for real, it’s almost unbearable,
tears start to flow, I think about taking my own life, but don’t,
instead I shake it off, write it down, get these words out of me,
to show we all hurt & it’s okay to lose control,
& yeah I know I’ve got nothing really to complain about,

because I’ve got a great life & all that,
but knowing my life is better than most of those in this world,
doesn’t really make me feel better or enhanced,
in fact, it actually makes me more depressed,
it makes me wonder what hope we have left,
as the forests burn, the wars rage,
& the polar bears frantically panic on ever melting ice caps,
& I’m constantly aware of all of these obvious facts,
& maybe that’s why I’m in my car with tears in my lap,
lost with no motivation running out of time & patience,
can’t see a future, feel the present, or remember the past,
This Unruly Mess We’ve Made looks great, shout out to Mac,
but it wasn’t built to last, so how much more can it withstand?
& despite all of this or maybe because of it,

we always fall instantly in love,
because it seems like love is the only thing that matters,
THH3 235 ∆
& the only thing that can save us from ourselves,
but maybe we need to fly in love instead of fall in love,

maybe we need to change what we say & how it’s said,
change ‘sick’ to ‘healthy’, change ‘get fckt’ to ‘get loved’,
fly in love instead of fall, maybe then we’ll finally be liberated,
maybe if we just showed a bit more love to the world,
maybe then that love would be reciprocated,
most have it twisted, love isn’t the problem, love is the solution,
we need more not less reckless loving without reservations,
even though 9 times out of 10, it leads to heartbreak again,
but we’d rather express our love, than try & hide it & pretend,
that we don’t feel anymore, because we still feel, even more,
so find someone to love right now, before everything ends,
& yes, I still love you,
& no I don’t think the main problem to blame is,

that we’re still always fallin’ instantly in love,
without restraint or reservation, losing what we came with,
& embracing, whoever it is, like we’ve never been hurt before,
because it’s better to live one day, in love,

than live in a lifetime of hate, there is nothing without love,
so go ahead, fall instantly in love, no restraint or reservation,
embracing whoever it is, like you’ve never been hurt before..
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 236 ∆
The Revenant [64]
You came, to me again, in a not so distant dream,

as a lucid deja vu abstruse version of you, you appeared,
in hues of tangerines, aquamarines, & other wonderful tones,
I swear you felt so tangible I could almost hold you here,
you intruded into my lucid dream, as a most welcomed intruder,

somehow you knew I’d invited you even with no invitation letter
got me wondering, where have you gone, you disappeared,

got me praying, please reappear, & touch me with your stare,
return & bless me with the presence of your essence,
please grace me with your nature, take me anywhere but here,
here in this house, silence has never sounded so loud,
sick & tired of being awake while everyone else uneasily rests,
caught in the world wide web, the global net, head in the clouds,
in Darwin’s web, AI’s Skynet, we forget ourselves step by step,
found out most out here are lost in indifference since you left,
left me with nothing, so nothing left to lose except reference,
now I only see you in dreams, so I just want to go to sleep,
so that’s where I’m determined to return like a revenant,
so you can come to me again, in a not so distant dream,

as a lucid deja vu abstruse version of you, you’ll appear,
in hues of tangerines, aquamarines, & other wonderful tones,
grace me with your nature & take me anywhere but here…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 237 ∆
The Rose Garden (Dee-Lish) [65]
At The Rose Garden in Portland,

pleasantly lost amongst the aroma of acres of roses,
sitting beneath a wreath of reds it feels like what a throne is,
writing proses in a place well named Shakespeare’s Garden,
lost in wonderful colors that’re most thoughtfully arranged,

this is awesome & also symbolic of the existence that’s me,
a phenomenon like a rose that grows up from the concrete,
a marvelous anomaly that left home alone at the age of 15,
who had nothing at all that he could call his own,
except his word, a wing on a prayer & the American dream,
now he’s a 35 year old self made millionaire,
that sits comfortably on the other side of The Conspiracy,
pays all his mom’s bills, makes sure that she eats well,
& invites his dad to places that he’s never been,
like this rose garden here in Portland that he brought him,

& where they both are a currently exploring scenery,
God Bless America.
America The Beautiful, America The Strong,

America I Love You, your Bill of Rights & even your wrongs,
& speaking of wrongs, I had a dream last night, about Drake,

in it, I’d failed to protect him, only to awake,
THH3 238 ∆
this morning & read that Jay Z suddenly has beef with him,
& I had an offer from him that I didn’t take,
& I know that seems irrelevant,

especially here in the tranquility of The Rose Garden,
where it’s hard to be upset when amongst such sweet scents,
I bet The Rose Garden could be renamed No More Problems,
but everything’s connected,

in more ways than we know,
anyways let’s get back to enjoying to the moment,
where we just smelled the most wonderful rose,
it’s a hybrid breed called ‘Dee-Lish’, the name’s appropriate,

since it smells just like the name it’s called sounds,
‘Dee-Lish’, see it’s important to enjoy the moments you’re in,
even when you’re going through stuff & super stressed out,
take what they say as good advice like I did,

& take some time to smell the roses,
beauty is always hidden in plain sight you just have to behold it,
& nowhere is that more apparent than in this garden of roses,
at The Rose Garden in Portland,

pleasantly lost amongst the aroma of acres of roses,
sitting beneath a wreath of reds it feels like what a throne is,
writing proses in a place well named Shakespeare’s Garden…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 239 ∆
The Secret Life of Walter Mitty [66]
Live a little, nah fck that, live a lot, this is, your life,
it’s the only one you’ve got, & you don’t know when you’ll go,
so go no filler like Ben Stiller assisting Syrian refugees,
go all in no filter like Sean Penn interviewing El Chapo,
make some memories, shoot your own documentary,

stamp life’s passport with experiences as the visa’s ink,
no leaders to follow no one’s in control or owns your soul,
experiences define us as we’re experiencing,
experience define us we define experiences results may vary,
it’s a sliding scale, life’s too short to wear such a long face,
dance in rain wearing nothing but your heart on your sleeve,
only a given amount of time, they’re not making anymore of it,
& no amount of money can buy additional time to breathe,
no amount of money can buy any amount of time,
so spend your money on spending time doing what you want,

spend it all, money that is, while you’re still alive to enjoy it,
& give whatever remains left to charity when you die,
especially if you don’t have & leave behind any kids,
be the stuff legends are made of,

live your life like it’s all made up,
THH3 240 ∆
the clock ticks faster & faster every day cycles accelerate,
the train’ about to take off, & it won’t wait up,
& there’s no conductor to conduct the train, what the fck,
but just in case to be safe get off your butt & get the fck up!
Get up!
Live a little, nah fck that, live a lot, this is, your life,
I’m serious, I’m so fckn serious,

& I know that this seems like it’s just a poem,
but really it’s a testimonial,
an urgent call to get it together & get going,
there’s no time like the present,
the things we do we never regret,
the things we don’t do we always regret, don’t be the one,
to be saying “should’ve would’ve could’ve” on your death bed,
actually, don’t even rest on a death bed,

die in a blaze of glory,
in an avalanche on a mountain top,
it’s your life, write your story,
this is the book you’ll never read again,

these are the pages you can not turn back,
THH3 241 ∆
these are the words that lead to the moments,
this is your autobiography & all of it’s fact,
fact, there’s no going back,
fact, no one’s going to live your life for you,
fact, wake up get up show up,
fact, your times almost up, best to act accordingly,
so tell to me, what’re you going to do,

don’t ask me it’s not up to me it’s up to you,
it’s your life to love I can’t live it for you,
but if you want my advice here I’ll give it to you,
it’s live a little, nah fck that, live a lot, this is, your life,
make some memories, shoot your own documentary,

stamp life’s passport with experiences as the visa’s ink,
no leaders to follow no one’s in control or owns your soul,
experiences define us as we’re experiencing,
experience define us we define experiences results may vary…
Sincerely, Walter Mitty…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 242 ∆
The Valley of Sin [67]
Gotta get some extensive REM rest,

so I can keep my extensive personal defense up,
because it takes a lot of comprehensive stamina,
to deflect those mouth breathin’ heathens & all their ill intents,
often knocking at my entrance, plotting options for entering,

collecting relevant intelligence, attempting actions to get in,
but as much as they try access is always denied,
like a moronic impoverished blockhead's Harvard admission,
or an offensive nobody with no money standing outside,
in line trying to pass the ropes to get into Hyde’s entrance,
who’s name’s not on the guest list but still wants to be let in,
& is obviously insufficient, in turn auto-rejected no exceptions,
no game no names get nothing from me as much as they try,
nope no way no how no lie no exceptions,
not accepted, I’ve got Gargoyles guarding the doorways,

in good faith loyally standing guard at the entrance,
so as much as these heathens try to get by there’s no way,
my relentless defenses defeat all infiltration attempts,
as I watch from the watchtower like a Watchman,
I spy the Devil waiting patiently outside from within,
I’m not sure if the prayers served in these verses are enough,
to explain myself or serve their purpose as redemption,
either way nothing’s a given dodging temptations,
THH3 243 ∆
as I walk resolute through The Valley of Sin,
outside trying to make my way home,

trying to stay out of trouble & prevent myself from giving in,
& most of the time I succeed in staying virtuous,
but sometimes somehow I give up, give in, & let the Devil win,
see usually I keep the Devil out,

but sometimes sneakily he finds a way to get in,
I mean everything everyday is a struggle at least these days,
but hey, what can I say I am just a man, so it makes sense,
& at the end of the day whatever may be will be & that’s that,
but then again you’ve gotta lose some battles to win the war,
so if the Devil makes it in, I bet him on a game of chess,
begin to let him win, pretend I’m doomed then take his king,
win the bet, kick him out when it’s getting late & get some rest,
& God willing I’ll live long enough to fight again,

so that hopefully one day we won’t have to fight anymore,
& that’s why I’ve gotta get some extensive REM rest,
so I can keep my extensive personal defense up,
because it takes a lot of comprehensive stamina,
to deflect those mouth breathin’ heathens & all their ill intents..
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 244 ∆
Things Fall Apart [68]
My psyche has become,

an eclectic collection of past relationships,
a combination of all the feelings any stranger has ever felt,
along with all the feelings of every girl I ever had relations with,
I still feel each one of them inside, they are a part of me,
exchanged a part of myself with everyone I’ve ever slept with,
this, is, way beyond our control, slaves to the physical,
maids made from the momentary expressions of souls impulse,
here on planet earth, none of this is rehearsed,

no seats are reserved everyone thinks but no one is sure,
no one wants to play along if the DJ’s not playing a song,
when the music ceases to sound we sit down where we are,
in hot seats & Musical Chairs not prepared to be served,
but so what, who one cares if you’ve prepared,
or what you’d prefer, you know what, it’s inconsequential,
because regardless of preference you’re gonna get served,
& rest assured you’re gonna get served what you deserve,
& you’re gonna eat what you’re served, no alternative,
& guess what the ticket you grip decides what you’re severed,
at the table as has been actors with ADD act inattentive,
they stammer can barely remember the words they’ve learned,
forgetting their manners & forgetting their words,
a prima donna Rick Dalton Once Upon a Time in Hollywood,
at times can be theatrically awkward, but I give you my word,
every thing is real, life’s a trip, from thee Benz to thee hearse,
THH3 245 ∆
from the sands & the dirt to a towering mountain top perch,
I mean I’m not certified sure, but that’s what they say,
acting Marvin Gaye just Heard it Through the Grapevine,
not much longer would you be mine,
I guess we need some break time,
that’s the word for sure, wait a second, first, things first,
bliss & pain are the same, & yes of course this life hurts,
you can trace the road map, marked with scars along the way,
our topography’s an oddity, no I don’t care if I’m called insane,
broken pieces of a beautiful puzzle,

of what some would say is the world’s most beautiful art,
an original expression of the Essence of God,
scholars attempt to explain the phenomenon that we are,
but explaining’s the hardest part, so don’t know where to start,
I guess what they say is true sometimes. Things Fall Apart,
this is, the truth, even the deepest roots become unearthed,
this is real life we all play our parts albeit unrehearsed,
none of this is choreographed, no one knows how to act,
we’re all crazy call me J.T., no one’s in sync, we’re not N Sync,
not boys, not in a boy band, no Diddy not Making The Band,
not a reenactment in fact this’s not at all what you might think,
making bands, I sink, in quicksand quicker than,
regrets that can take you down that rabbit hole,
a better man with genius plans that’s brilliant,
a Holy Man but also a man that’s not totally whole,
who knows most things don’t go as planned so he improvises,
THH3 246 ∆
sicker than alot of them,“I am what I am” Popeye & Olive Oyl,
both yes & no”, go,
be gone with the wind that blows,

with the blood that spills from the moon & starts to flow,
creating rivers of embers of fire from souls that glow,
this may go down debated as the Greatest Story Ever Told,
the Goddess is good as gold smooth as silk the style she owns,
24k puro as we stroll down that Yellow Brick Road,
we perform our own heroics because we are our own heroes,
on stage we’re all the actors on with the lights on with the show
24, 7,
365,
New World Pop Art,
testimonials of our times in these days of our life,
my psyche has become,

an eclectic collection of past relationships,
a combination of all the feelings any stranger has ever felt,
along with all the feelings of every girl I ever had relations with,
I still feel each one of them inside, they are a part of me,
exchanged a part of myself with everyone I’ve ever slept with,
this, is, way beyond our control, slaves to the physical,
maids made from the momentary expressions of souls impulse.
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 247 ∆
This Experimental Life [69]
Big Brother probably has me blackmailed,

for something I did so long ago it’s practically a past life,
never was one for playing the background or the back field,
always more of the ‘out of left field surprise’ kinda guy,
attracted to the spotlight, as well as the attention it provides,

at the same time reserving the right to take the liberty to hide,
I’ve been comfortable in it, still am, look how smooth I move,
a fine guy, a good man, a bad boy, but a cool dude,
act casual don’t have to try, not the type to stress you out,
or lead you on, won’t mess around & be rude to you,
nope no ma’am that’s not him no way no how,
so what happened then, did they blackmail him, that’s not cool,
oh well boo hoo,

can’t cry over spilt guilt, can’t die over past regrets,
you will survive that’s why they call it will,
not Jada’s husband or Smith’s kid but gifted none the less,
no stress, no thanks, all good, all set,
so let them watch me,
let the All Seeing Eye keep keeping an eye on me,

it’s fine, if anything They’re probably protecting me,
THH3 248 ∆
the New World Order has to have a few faces publicly,
so I don’t mind besides it’s good for the publicity,
call me The Not So Anonymous Conglomerate of Everything,
stop freaking out everything’s fine,

don’t ask me, I can’t think of anything to do about it but type,
maybe take a break, wake, make some crew love,
take a few new drugs, sleep it off, then get back to the grind,
lost her in time,

chillin’ with The Chi-Lites, tell me “Have You Seen Her.”,
lost my mind,
tell me have you seen it,
it’s dark in here & there are cobwebs,
call me a cab I don’t have to be convinced I mean it,
Jesus,
Mary & Joseph,
I wouldn’t even believe I wrote this either,
if I wasn’t the one that was there when I wrote it,
anyways,
it doesn’t matter anymore, nothing does these days,
might flash a wave as we roll by on the freeway,
but other than that I don’t have much free time or free days,
wanna know a not so abstract fact about Yours Truly,
THH3 249 ∆
sure why not let’s get to the plot of this odd movie,
Fun Fact: I’m still living with my passed regrets,
can’t shake them like after an ocean swim, I’m still wet,
this might not be a movie but it definitely feels like a movie set,
I guess, all these screens I see these days have me confused,
I mean I don’t know the real me nor do I know the real you,
thought I liked you until I met YouTube instead of the real you,
& now well I just don’t have time, hope I’m not being too rude,
it’s just these days I spend more time online than I do on you,
or with you,
& I’m sorry if it seems it’s easier not to care,
go out this days & see Fifty Shades of Gray hard not to stare,
but they’re not the shades that come along with underwear,
they’re shades that come with disconnection,
they turn on tune in drop out get spun in opposite directions,
drop in, turn out & turn off, & this is the part,
where I don’t know if I should continue, or if I should just stop,
so I stop,
don’t want to do anything I’d regret,
because I know They’re gung ho to blackmail me,
would’ve already if they had something to blackmail me with,
but they don’t having anything to use against me yet,
as I squint my eyes & focus on the TV set,
okay it’s not a TV it’s a computer but what’s the difference,
THH3 250 ∆
gosh this has been one heck of a ride are we there yet,
I’m getting anxious I give up let’s get going,

I’m ready to get there already & get off this ride,
escape this confused amusement park, I’m not amused at all,
where’s the exit, let’s pack up & go for a five day trek outside,
camp under countless stars,

lay on our backs & gaze at the sky,
where we can be safe & at peace from the breath of the beast,
no screens nor cameras no intrusive spying prying eyes,
just us with the Creator,

“Hallelujah, Thank God We’re Alive!”,
breathe in, speak out,
“Peace Out, Peace To All See You On The Other Side.”,
& until that time Big Brother will likely have me blackmailed,
for something I did so long ago it’s practically a past life,
never was one for playing the background or the back field,
always more of the ‘out of left field surprise’ kinda guy,
hi,
I too am in this experimental life,
would you be so kind as to please remind me of your name,
& while you’re at it enlighten me as to why we’re alive…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 251 ∆
Throwing A Party & You’re Invited [70]
Let’s throw a massive party & invite everybody we know,

yes, let’s even put our extra special exes on The Guestlist,
don’t play dumb, you know the ones,
the ones you loved so much that you had to disconnect with,
the ones you get the chills from just thinking of,
& you don’t know if it’s the good or bad kind of gooseflesh,
Goosebumps like Travis Scott got at the birth of his first kid,
or the label heads at Top Dawg would get,
if they dropped a ‘best of’ & noticed no Kendrick,
yup those flesh crawling goosebumps, wicked & attractive,
yup, those ones, & the ones to which they are attributed,
those souls that leave you freezing stone cold frozen,
in addition to leaving you overheating, heartbeat speeding,
at the side of the road hood up transmission broken,
the ones that just the thought of is enough to shutter at,
let’s invite them also, it’ll be grand, we’ll keep our options open,
we can hold hands sing Lennon’s ‘Imagine’, & slow dance,
or we can go mad, get loaded, strip naked, & pole dance,
or both, it’s not important as long as when they arrive,
instead of beefing, we look them in the eyes & forgive them,
relieve ourselves, of the past weight that was felt,
from the grief that was dealt, in the past by former selves,
& after that happens let’s let them forgive us as well,
because no one is innocent completely, no one at all,
THH3 252 ∆
then once all is forgiven we can get back to livin’,
enjoying the party, what’s done is done, we are one now,
& I know I’ve been gone awhile, & I know life is moving fast,
& that’s why I’m suggesting, we throw a party & have a blast,
I mean why not, what else are we going to do,

we’ve done everything else, we’ve ever wanted to do,
personally I’ve got it all now,

& the only thing missing is you,
so I called to let you know we’re throwing a party,
& you should roll through,
I know you’re a bit antisocial, & haven’t felt like yourself lately,
but you know what, that’s okay, just show up, be present,
no pressure don’t have to be the life of the party or anything,
plus I can relate, been feeling the same way lately, so I get it,
that’s part of the reason I suggested,

we through a massive party & put everyone on the Guestlist,
so let’s throw a massive party & invite everybody we know,

yes, let’s even put our extra special exes on The Guestlist,
don’t play dumb, you know the ones,
the ones you loved so much that you had to disconnect with…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 253 ∆
Till The End (In The Name of Love) [71]
I’m like those freaks in the street on repeat that keep babblin’,
except my pockets are deep & I’m round the world traveling,
so it’s actually opposite, I’m giving gifts, not asking for a thing,
not a beggar, nor a debtor, no sir, not a straggler scrambling,
if you observe you’ll see things are often not what they seem,
i.e., when the market crashed my earnings actually increased,
but it was all for a good cause because I’m a man of peace,
plus a generous philanthropist with a penchant for donating,
a benevolent resident that finds it better to give than receive,
gets his kicks from donating anonymously to various charities,
generally practices abstinence as well as celibacy,
often gets lost in moments but never forgets his priorities,
still stressed out, though, no doubt life’s a trip,

which is why we’re free falling in love,
in too deep flying off this cliff,
after the Leap of Faith we made in the Name of Love,
free fallin’, Heaven’s calling out my name, “Aaron, Aaron.”,
wake up, the show’s almost over,

that’s fine I’m enjoying my dream time, ignoring all orders,
let me sleep in the meantime & only wake me when it’s all over,
we’ve already contributed so much, we deserve some Oscars,
THH3 254 ∆
stage of life we all play our parts, I’m in love with all your parts,
it’s such a gift to witness a creation such as you creating art,
priceless divineness, I’m at your service Your Highness,
I serve with honor, fearless & loyal until it’s all over,
falling over the edge again, all in, everything goes, slow-mo,
free fall, oceans waves, in too deep, into the deep blue we go,
trapped in the attraction of the galaxy’s blackest Black Hole,
orbit so enormous it can’t be escaped, ignored or controlled,
lawless but not heartless, such a marvelous sight to behold,
like a light in the darkness of night that’s so bright it glows,
you’re shine can’t be contained so the glow overflows,
such a sparkling star you are, your shine can’t be denied,
serious as Sirius is your brightness lights up the whole show,
burning up in it’s own brilliance, honestly you are,
one of the most brilliant Stars this universe has ever known,
oh, I know, it’s all more than just a bit intense,

& that’s okay, because we are Heaven Sent,
received an RSVP invite to Heaven,
& of course I said “Hell Yes!”,
over zealous but I’ve got my reasons for this,

got grown men that depend on my money as their salary,
in too deep,
in the deep blue see,
see I used to be a runaway,
ran away & was raised by the streets,
THH3 255 ∆
so this whole business life is a little new to me,
plus I feel guilty for even being a human being,
I mean that’s likely why the exact fact is I’m not having kids,
in fact I’m donating everything I own to charity,
Nature Conservatories, NGOs, & other organizations,

that make an effort towards the betterment of humanity,
will hand over all my interests & all my properties,
to someone that can hopefully manage my trust responsibly,
I’ve got all the resources in the world,

just have to learn how to manage them properly,
I’m probably,
talking to much again,
like those freaks in the street on repeat that keep babblin’,
except my pockets are deep & I’m round the world traveling,
I’m sorry,
I’m not sorry,
you’ll understand if you’re a true friend,
with love & respect ‘till the end.
’Till The End,
free fallin’, Heaven’s calling out my name, “Aaron, Aaron.”…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 256 ∆
Timelines [72]
What are you searching for, what are you hoping to find,
when you spend time scrolling down timelines,
shouldn’t be looking down so much should be looking up,
until we become the stars we regard as part of the skyline.
Want to say I don’t care anymore, wish that was the truth,
but if I do say that then that’d mean I was lying,
because the fact is I care more now than I ever did before,
that’s why I ask you all the time,
what are you searching for what do you hope to find,
see just like you I keep scrolling through iTunes,

but still can’t seem to find anything interesting to download,
even though I’ve got a auto-renewable subscription,
so I can download, any song, & as many songs, as I want to,
torpid sorta sordid, scrolling through assorted timelines,

Facebook posts, Twitter words & Instagram memes,
but can’t seem to find anything of any significant interest,
which doesn’t make sense since I love everyone & everything,
got everything we want, but nothing that we need,

seems we traded in our real dreams, for fantasies on a screen,
forgot we used to be free, took a seat & took this TV,
it’s amazing how they make miracles, seem so easy,
THH3 257 ∆
it’s like, these machines give us everything we ever want,
without giving us anything that we really need,
& it’s strange that we’ve won every battle, but still feel defeat,
we’re sitting around, alone, with all these toys at our feet,
but we don’t want to play or socialize except with social media,
that’s why instead of going out we stay in & order UberEats,
feeling like a Prince without a Kingdom,

a King without a crown,
a Princess without a Queendom,
bedazzled in a magnificent castle without a throne,
that gets anything she wishes without a wishlist, except rest,
& can go anywhere she wants to go except go home,
feeling like Prince in his Paisley Park estate gated in,

no community, just a eulogy by Frank Ocean told,
after all was said & done $10 million spent on construction,
& all that he had left in the end was himself left alone,
dead in an elevator, guess it’s faster than taking the stairs,
Stairway To Heaven a palace’s just vacuous if missing a home,
are you missing your home, that home you never had,
are you missing that feeling, that feeling you can’t quite grab,
is that, exactly why you keep scrolling through iTunes,

is that, exactly why we keep scrolling though iTunes,
THH3 258 ∆
we’re both missing the same thing & searching in vain,
eerily ironic how we feel so alone while being in the same room,
& I feel your pain, & you feel mine too,

excuse me for being rude, maybe I’m confused,
maybe, we wanted to get attention, instead of getting used,
maybe, the intention was attention but instead we got used,
all this plus I feel like a whore,

like I sold my soul for some toys & attention,
& now the only time I feel anything at all,
is when I get a notification that I’ve gotten a mention,
& there’s so much more I want to mention,

but then again I guess what’s the use,
why start something that’s only definite is an ending,
but I’m your friend so if you want to begin I guess it’s up to you,
I’m willing to relax,

I’ll answer all your questions,
let’s trade facts,
truth or dare until we express all intentions,
in the pursuit of passions,

listening to intuitions,
remembering what it was to be human,
before we gave in & gave them all our emotions,
THH3 259 ∆
I swear something doesn’t feel right,
like most of these humans are just Programs,
who look like they are moving without intentions,
drones on phones just going through the motions,
our thumbs blindly guide us down these timelines,

liking posts from misguided idols that we don’t know in real life,
I suppose it’s a perfect example of the blind leading the blind,
as we lose our humanity one screen at a time…
But we’re not totally gone yet,

we can still come back, we still have time,
& that’s why I’m asking you while I still can,
what is it that you’re hoping to find?
What are you searching for, what are you hoping to find,
shouldn’t be looking down so much should be looking up,
until we become the stars we regard as part of the skyline…
Δ LaLux Δ
Los Angeles, CA.

October 8th, 2018
THH3 260 ∆
Too Late Tonight [73]
Fallen idols, with deceptive titles,

moving mannequins, going through the motions,
singing along to songs with empty lyrics & no spirit,
moment of truth delayed, a dreamer’s dream deferred.
Where have we gone,

how have we gone,
so far we will most likely never return,
lost, who forgot the breadcrumbs?
no trail of breadcrumbs just Andrew Jackson’s Trail of Tears.
There is no return,
we are way past that point,
forget the formalities, these words can’t save us now,
these words are just that, words, words, words.
Who cares?
I don’t.
I am, whatever you want to think I am,

a fallen idol, a moving mannequin,
not surprised, were you expecting anything different,
I wish we wished, for the same thing.
We could have global world peace, could have unified harmony,
THH3 261 ∆
could have our dreams come true, instead of being deferred.
I find myself balancing on Babylon’s curb,

out past dark, lost on these nocturnal streets,
I cross, through tarmac valleys full of plastic trees,
cradled, in cement constructed mountains of concrete,
I find myself trying to find the words,

in the ambiance of the twinkling twilight of the constant grey,
it appears to seem that every way leads to a dead end street,
I find myself, finding out nobody knows which way to go,

where wino pee follows along the cracks in creviced cement,
delivered like liquid yellow rivers of apathetic indifference,
I find myself, past Green Day on this Blvd of Broken Dreams,

where the rains thankfully comes to visit occasionally,
to gracefully & mercifully wash away our collective sins,
the collective sins of us fallen idols, with deceptive titles,

moving mannequins, going through the motions,
singing along to songs with empty lyrics & no spirit,
moment of truth delayed, a dreamer’s dream deferred..
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 262 ∆
Tracy Batman [74]
Give me one reason to stay here,

& I’ll turn right back around,
said I don’t want to leave you lonely,
you’ve got to make me change my mind now,
give me one reason to stay here, & I’ll turn right back around,
& no money won’t help not at all not in any amount,
I’m past possessions & almost past The Point of No Return,
so at this point I see no point in turning back now,
like Tracy Chapman, Bruce Wayne Batman, or Tracy Morgan,

like the Joker, Heath Ledger, Edgar Poe, or Captain Morgan,
or a Spacey Captain or a Racy Batman ready for action,

just not actually Kevin Spacey, we all know what happened,
we can imagine, so there’s no need for a reenactment,
I know I’m handsome, thanks for the compliment, I’m flattered,
but not interested ‘cause I just don’t find guys that attractive,
so quit the harassment & passive aggressive temper tantrums,
& quit asking for a dance, you already have your answer,
I only give straight facts fam, don’t know those fake strangers,
don’t need the gold you try to coax me with, my soul’s platinum
not a flash in the pan scam, I scan more than you can imagine,
hindsight 20/20 vision, I read the whole thing backwards,
from the final ending, to lights camera action,
THH3 263 ∆
gone till November,
leaving on a jet plane to Denver,
more Tracy Chapman than Tracy Morgan,
more Jon Wayne than Jon Denver,
more Honcho than Jon Doe, more Pronto than Macho,
more Brando than Tonto, full throttle no turning back now,
won’t back down,

feel most alive in times when I almost die,
the real thing, we vroom vroom we do don’t try try,
no need to try to live this life when you really live that life,
why sail the high seas when you can reach Heaven & fly?
Living The Life of Lives, living The Dream of Dreams,

one dream at a time, lucidly asking, “What do you mean?”,
I mean, for real, for really real, how do you really feel?
It’s 2019, & this feels like a Sci-Fi flic,

one where we’re an Army of One, set to deploy & I feel sick,
every Moon has a dark side, every man has something to hide,
like Nazis with a secret base on the moon, entitled Iron Sky,
in a film from 2012 set in 2018, see everyone has 2 sides,
but instead of Pink Floyd everything’s White Noise amplified,
everyone dies but not everyone lives so live your life,
THH3 264 ∆
nympho cryptos are raised from the dead like a horror story,
Tales From The Crypto or better yet Tales From The Darkside,
saw a drawing at an art exhibit in Phoenix called Sad Pony,
sad because it was a unicorn without a horn, spark had died,
sure he appears alive, though when you look close,

you see the spark has disappeared from his eyes,
knows he has to escape, before the city gets what he has left,
the Soul he holds dear, as he marches through the pain & fear,
he’s ready to go already but doesn’t want to leave you behind,
so before he goes he turns on his toes & asks just to be clear,
one last time, “Are you ready to get out of here?”,

either come now or give me a reason to stay & make it clear.
Give me one reason to stay here,

& I’ll turn right back around,
said I don’t want to leave you lonely,
you’ve got to make me change my mind now,
give me one reason to stay here, & I’ll turn right back around,
& no money won’t help not at all not in any amount,
I’m past possessions & almost past The Point of No Return,
so at this point I see no point in turning back now…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 265 ∆
Tye-Dyed [75]
Whatever you do,

don’t over do it,
whatever you think,
don’t over think it,
best advice I was ever given,

by my biggest little sister in a recording studio,
in my hometown of Hollywood California,
the biggest little town in the whole wide world,
heartbeats & heartbreaks, we mix the red with the blue pills,
it’s chill,
don’t stress, life is what it is,
ah yes, tie dyes & hair ties, hair wraps & veggie wraps,
downtempo psy-trance lovestep, both solo & together in step,
where are you from, doesn’t really matter now,

you’re here I’m here, let’s share a smoke & pass a smile,
hand me some sunshine,

you Sparkle Faced Rainbow Jellybean,
remember a single candle’s flame,
always brightens all the darkness that it sees,
which means, that no matter where you go,
THH3 266 ∆
the darkness, can never touch your soul,
so light the fire, shine your light,

this is a Waking Day Dream, this is One Love Tonight,
these are the Days of Your Life,
this is that time that is right,
let the music play,

as the wind carries our vibes,
we’re all in this together now on this lightening ship,
& yeah it’s disorderly but it sure is one heck of a wild ride,
& hey don’t over think it, that’s the best advice,
it’s chill in Hollywood, where the whole world opens wide,
heartbeats & heartbreaks, we mix the red with the blue pills,
it’s a toxic cocktail that goes well with this wild ride,
it’s chill,
don’t stress, life is what it is,
ah yes, tie dyes & hair ties, hair wraps & veggie wraps,
downtempo psy-trance lovestep, both solo & together in step,
where are you from, doesn’t really matter now,

you’re here I’m here, let’s share a smoke & pass a smile…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 267 ∆
Unconditionally [76]
& I still love you,

your beautiful scars & magnificent faults,
your birthmarks & your stretch marks,
I still love you,
always have, always will,

& nothing can change that, not even us,
I love your struggles,

I love your beauty marks disguised as triangle scars,
I love your battles,
because through it all you’ve emerged victorious in war,
you took all their abuses & all their objectifying,

& turned those into something that defies all defining,
you brushed the dirt off your shoulder that they were throwing,
broke out the box they put you in to show there’s no confining,
went blow for blow a hero who won’t go down without fighting,
a champion for underdogs everywhere, you’re odd defying,
beat all odds even though they didn’t fight fair with their lying,
brought to light all their thinly disguised misogyny underlyings,
after all the agony they put you through to conquer you,
you still arose victoriously out the other side shining,
smelling sweeter than any rose becoming greater than any foe
made your way out their crooked ways, a one woman uprising,
THH3 268 ∆
& these days instead of bending to their will,
you’re exercising your rights, your soul, & your mind,
meditating, teaching yoga & helping others heal, body aligning,
& that’s why you’ll always be a hero to be admired in my eyes,
your resolve is resolute, you are, a testimonial to will power,
a lone liberated falcon, flying high, through unfriendly skies,
you glide, you are subtle lessons, you are determined growth,
you are, not so subliminal messages, both Bear & Butterfly,
& that is why, I still love you,

not even after, but as a result of, all that you’ve been through,
because the fact that you survived all that you’ve been though,
proves miracles exist & you as a living miracle are proof,
you are a work in progress, an open book,
you are invincible to their hate, unconditional in your love,
so I accept all of you, unconditionally,

you are always welcome here with me, from now to infinity,
because, I still love you,

your beautiful scars & magnificent faults,
your birthmarks & your stretch marks,
I still love you,
always have, always will,

& nothing can change that, not even us…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 269 ∆
Valley Boy [77]
All those years worn,

you never did make it outta The Valley,
all those feature film premieres, never did land a starring roll,
or get any recognition, let alone an Oscar from The Academy,
all those foggy eyed groggy times, you were probably high,
all those checks you cashed, for your non refundable time,
waking up one day, wondering where it all went,

driving a car with a lease more expensive your apartment’s,
still stuck in that same apartment, off Ventura Blvd.,

still a B-List actor sucking that A-List cock,
still getting haircuts from stylist, still racking up milage,
got more clothes in your closet than dollars in the bank,
& in the end after it’s all said & done & all the time is spent,
& you’re finally spent, what’ll you have left to show for it all?
All those years worn,

spent suspended in mid air, baking in The Valley,
all those times you attended, those feature film premieres,
still no recognition, let alone an Oscar from The Academy..
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 270 ∆
Vegas Baby [78]
Eating,
sushi, in the center,
at the top, of the pyramid,
this is The Life, point blank period.
Hamachi ahi, uni unagi, we eat everything,

up to the last big fish in all the seven seas,
seven seas, seven sins, at the table gamblin’,
wash it all down with all green everything,
green eyes, green cash, green grass, green tea,
it happens so fast, like that, both loud & silent simultaneously,
signs of the times, from poor to rich, changing degrees,
tables turn, lights switch, look how the pendulum swings,
built on the backs, of high hopes & low self esteems,

every game is fixed, & sits upon a million broken dreams,
see I’ve seen a man lose his everything,
due to unrealistic dreams, & self obsessed greeds,
in his passionate pursuit to procure his wants,
he lost absolutely all of his necessary needs,
see, this is Vegas Baby,

where bad things seem good, & good things seem shady,
though luckily, I’ve mastered the art of the sin,

so I rarely play, & when I do play I play to win,
THH3 271 ∆
loaded dice, cards up my sleeve,
I know the dealers plus I paid off the magicians,
so I go all in, then take my winnings to my penthouse suite,
where a sweet freak waits for me between sheets in position,
for I am one of those,

who made it to the top of the pyramid,
in Vegas at the Luxor,
told you before this is The Life, point blank period.
Once inside I draw a bubble bath of passionfruit & guava,

as I soak my bruised bones & blood diamonds smokin’ iguana,
I smile but this is no joke, exude The Good Life without tryin’,
my karma mixed with my commas brought me to Nirvana,
no Kurt Cobain, no fun or games, just this hurt & pain,
mixed up with this money made my a monster,
no Meek Mills, or weak wills, just this student that came,
from the School of Hard Knocks & graduated with honors,
some how, so now,
I’m swimmin’ in endorphins with a princess no tiara,
no tomorrow, no time to borrow,
& I Bet we’re gonna make Love Sex Magic no Future or Ciara,
that’s a pop reference, if you didn’t get it yet,

Future, Ciara, I Bet, Love Sex Magic, trick,
or treat, see, there’s tons of puns to read,

& subliminal messages to see, in almost every line I write,
THH3 272 ∆
sometimes the sublime subliminals are so subtle,
that I don’t even catch them they escape no alibi,
copy cat killers, can imitate but never copyright,
they’re just imitation fillers, while my literature stays genuine,
all illegitimate posers bogus attempts are fraudulent insights,
& pale in comparison to my bonafide legitimate ledgers of time
I’m, often imitated, but never duplicated,

I’m, the Word of God, plus what Satan admitted,
forearms tatted with pitchforks, back tatted with angel wings,
this, is the balance of extremes, the medicine that stings,
this, is what you get when you mix bits of different things,
this is what happens, when fashion meets passion,
this is a combination of everything & everything,
this is it, this is all, I am definitely infinitely everything,
all the while meditating on all of this,

sitting here at this restaurant as they stare,
an American Dream an ICON Living Legend in the flesh,
awake in a never-ending nefarious nightmare.
Eating,
sushi, in the center,
at the top, of the pyramid,
this is The Life, point blank period…
Δ LaLux Δ
Las Vegas
THH3 273 ∆
Venice Beach [79]
Took a walk through Venice today,

after a talk with Ryron Gracie at Jiu Jitsu class,
shoes off, to my right is sand, to my left is waves,
trying to slow down when life moves too fast,
walking along that place where sand greets waves,

past heartbeats & heartbreaks, picnics & surf breaks,
I purify my mind, from Venice to Santa Monica, pier to pier,

because shady characters make it difficult to see clear,
navigating these muddy waters in troubled times,

surrounded by folks but somehow I know we’re all all alone,
I see the pain that hides in vain behind every Botox smile,
I know it’s been awhile, “Hello hello is this thing on?”,
got the green light, so now I’m speaking to the blue light,
“Girl just so you know you don’t have to put on the red light.”,
& she’s not Roxanne nor The Police but she’s got it poppin’,
so much so that it’s midday but tempted to take some bedtime,
I’m tired anyways, ready to retreat like my hairline,

I’m tired, please Lord take me home,
to the home I had before all of this, I’m over all of it,
it’s all politics, 4D chess, levels on levels, zones in zones,
THH3 274 ∆
on another level with a soul brother rebel,
zoning out in The Zone surfing on Google Chrome,
sometimes I think this life’s not worth the trouble,
even though it’s the sweetest thing I’ve ever known,
I mean it’s a miracle that we were even born,

they say odds of being born are 1 in 400 trillion,
so even when I’m down & out I don’t check out,
performing live now, the most interesting script ever written,
the best love ever made, a page in the greatest story ever told,
the most incredible song ever heard in this absurd system,
in this insane existence, sometimes nothing makes sense,

I mean what the fck is this, is it even any of my business,
in line, outta my mind, I’ve just arrived at The Skate Park,
posting up on a rail, watching the sun set in Venice,
California that is, not Italy, same empire, different century,

exhausted from beach walking & washing off the filthiness,
watching kids do kick flips, turning adversity into opportunity,
skate or die, do or try, life’s what happens while planning it,
this sunset is magnificent,

the colors more Godly than gaudy,
he who hesitates is lost,
so I’m coming for whoever sends for me,
don’t have to RSVP, don’t care if you’re socially awkward,
just leave your ego at the door when you come in the party,
THH3 275 ∆
& yeah it’s all almost over,
but hey we can still have some fun,
so pick your medicinals, yoga, smoke, or liquor sips,
& let’s get it started now because it’s all almost done,
wow,
what incredible sights, what surreal extravagant schemes,

neon tones of exuberance, fuchsias eggplants & pinks,
I think this piece has less points than an anorexic that’s obese,
but that’s okay because it feels good to read,
they say life is the journey not the destination, but either way,
please tell me what you think this is, & exactly what you mean,
do you believe we can cooperate, or must we always compete,
in too deep, in this empire of concrete, in a city on the beach,
sometimes you need to get some fresh air so you can breathe,
which is why I took a walk through Venice today,

after a talk with Ryron Gracie at Jiu Jitsu class,
took my shoes off, to my right was sand, to my left was waves,
tried to slow down because life was moving too fast…
Δ LaLux Δ
Venice, California
2018
THH3 276 ∆
Vibing While Waving The White Flag [80]
Okay okay alright, I give up, you win, I surrender,

I’m waiving the white flag, I’ve had enough, need to sit down,
I’m folding the cards in my hands, laying them on the table,
wiping the sweat off my forehead then throwing in the towel,
been running so long legs’re about to give out want to give up,
& I don’t know how but I’m totally open to figuring it out,
relinquishing resentments, adopting pups, & releasing doves,

reducing defenses, developing myself for receiving the love,
needing some hugs, making amends, making out, & making up,
ready to give it all up right now, cuddle up & do snuggle stuff,
just to be fully present for you directly, for us, stepping up,
& I know this ADHD makes it difficult to focus,
but babe you know I’m dedicated to making it work out,
yes my mind gets easily divided at times but love will overcome,
I’ll tame my mind it can be undivided when in your presence,
until my death which will likely come when least expected,
like so many other legends that have passed away suddenly,
probably in a plane crash or other similar event wreckage,
RIP Aaliyah, once gone can’t Try Again,

RIP JFK, probably our only real president,
RIP Otis Redding,
show some R-E-S-P-E-C-T, Try A Little Tenderness,
RIP Rocky Marciano,
KO’d after the plane dove on his 46th birthday,
THH3 277 ∆
RIP Buddy Holly, RIP Ritchie Valens,
both died on the same plane, so gone, so long La Bamba,
the Brightest Lights always cast the Darkest Shadows,

the brighter the light the darker the hues,
it’s the 4th of July we’re on a lake in Chile,
enjoying the company & enjoying the views,
post solar eclipse glory letting go of any lingering regrets,
though I do wish She were here,
they say heartbreak makes the best art,
but I don’t know if the effects are worth the burn I feel,
only here for a moment, so tell me why you came,

want to love liberated, but still inside my self built cage,
you possess priority in my life, your impression left indentions,
& I’m still trying to learn, how to show non sexual affection,
but it’s difficult when you’ve been abused,
it’s different when you’ve never felt love that was pure,
so I’m still working on it all or nothing, it’s up to you to choose,
if you’re willing to work with me until I’m cured I’m yours,
Okay okay alright, I give up, you win, I surrender,

I’m waiving the white flag, I’ve had enough, need to sit down,
I’m folding the cards in my hands, laying them on the table,
wiping the sweat off my forehead then throwing in the towel,
been running so long legs’re about to give out want to give up,
& I don’t know how but I’m totally open to figuring it out…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 278 ∆
Vice Grips [81]
My vices have me held, in a nice tight grip,

got lots to tell but won’t share my secrets, I’m tight lipped,
caught in a strangle hold controlled & ruled by an iron fist,
thought I had a tight grip on reality till my fingers slipped,
caught off guard, went overboard into the deep blue abyss,
now I’m swimming in our collective consciousness,
lost in my own subconscious conscience, with no coordinates,
would be important to order a submarine as my last request,
to help support the ongoing efforts I’m now absorbed in,
a constant conquest, to appease & honor an honest Goddess,
trying to stay conscientious, without being too pretentious,
confident yet cautious, I know what the objective is,
so I embark with enough courage to carry out & accomplish it,
I carry on without thinking much about the consequences,
because if I’m victorious I’ll be reward with her gorgeousness,
so I begin with relentlessness intent, & reckless abandonment,
some call it senseless, their comments way too overzealous,
my response is dismissive since they’re just jealous peasants,
despondent zealots, careless & unfair with their perspectives,
ruthless dependents, who could care less for repentance,
would rather be discriminant slaves than gain independence,
there should be tariffs, for those who’s incorrectness,
have the potential to cause stupendously stupid offenses,
they should be charged but there’s no such law in existence,
even if there was there’s no spiritual sheriff to apprehend them,
THH3 279 ∆
or enforce the laws upon the crimes caused by the defendants,
nor a judge which would be needed to hand down the sentence,
see, the census’s consensus, consents that, it’s all connected,

every one reaps what they sow, it’s to be expected,
they get what they get because they asked for it,
we all get what we get because we ask for it,
get what I get because I ask for it, if I can’t wait, I fast forward,
if I see a sign I take it to heart, I don’t pass or ignore it,
I explore it with a torch lit, if there’s a problem we’ll handle it,
so if you need any kind of assistance just ask for us,
don’t rush it we get what we deserve if it’s not broke don’t fix it,
we all have our flaws, our addictions, the difference is intent,
& I’d elaborate more eloquently, but already forgot what I said,
almost out of epiphanies, vice grip’s getting tight on my head,
still, we strive to stay real, in an increasingly fake matrix,

see even though I despise their lies, I do not hate them,
because we are all love, & yes you can quote this,
go ahead, call up, I’ll answer the line, & confirm I wrote this,
still, so many good deeds continue to go unnoticed,

while belligerent bullies continue to take time & take focus,
up to no good with their ulterior motives,
dirty dogs down in the doldrums with inferior Quotists,
as the careless continue on tangents,
THH3 280 ∆
careening in reckless abandon,
while the phantom badmen continue planning,
to conspire in terribly marvelous malevolent tandems,
& I’d sit with these senile sentinels & all of their problems,
a little while longer to find a way to authentically assist them,
in solving their problems, but I just don’t have compassion,
for anyone who doesn’t have compassion, so I’ve cashed in,
about to vanish & I suppose we can save a selected few,
but we simply can not save all of them from crashin’,
the lights are on, the cameras are rolling,
something’s about to happen, but I’m not ready for action,
back in, that cycle again, caught in, that vice grip, that’s when,
this terrible trial begins, this battle, for survival, my friend,
back, ready for action strapped in a flak jacket what’s happin’,
racing in a race, where there’s no winner nor end,
as the pretend end comes closer & closer,

& the party’s been over, but the vintage vinyl still spins,
as the enemies come closer & closer,
I find it odd that I fit in even when I’m lost in intent,
I find it oddly offensive that I ceded my entire empire’s defense,
I should have stayed sober, but didn’t so lost it all in any event,
should of stayed out of there, but instead I dove straight in,
& they say it’s all for the better, well I say that it all depends,
either way these events, make my solar even colder,

I’m over my limit, still getting lower & lower & lower,
THH3 281 ∆
in other words I’ve become,
a blind overaged adolescent using sonar,
melting ice caps & smoking greenhouse gases,
that’s all over for this curious bear that’s bi-polar,
still I stay in pose writing prose,

like Homer in October,
& we’re not talking The Simpsons,
we’re talking the Grecians the Romans with Caesar,
having Halloween in Hollywood,
hot as hell still cool as a glacier no fevers or seizures,
actually we’re having Holy rites in Hallowed wood,
in other words a spiritual seance inside a Cedar,
or Holy weens with Holly’s wood,

in other words pious opinions with Holly’s boner,
this is the cycle that never ends, just goes on & on my friend,
as the world spins, still caught in my vice grips again,
this is the cycle that never ends, just goes on & on my friend,
as the world spins, still caught in my vice grips again,
my vices have me held, in a nice tight grip,

got lots to tell but won’t share my secrets, I’m tight lipped,
caught in a strangle hold controlled & ruled by an iron fist,
thought I had a tight grip on reality till my fingers slipped…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 282 ∆
Victim Mentality [82]
A victim of my own indecisions,

even though I refuse to be used or choose a Victim Mentality,
see what good is knowledge if you don’t apply wisdom,
I guess of Causal Consumerism I’m just another casualty,
as we all are, as you all were,

as we all lose complete control, while trying to keep it together,
stay calm but stay strong stay up but stay collected,

even when your resolve is gone you’re harmed & neglected,
see I write the real in every defining line edited & published,
that’s why even if they don’t like it they still have to respect it,
standing there naked as the day I was born,

feeling faded & forlorn, feeling outdated & forsworn,
the crimes they committed were all pre-meditated,
like the climax is from a man pack that ejacs in an ’80s porn,
& you’re just lying there,

taking it all because you don’t know what else to do,
plus subconsciously you still need other people’s validation,
you plead to be told even though you already know you’re cute,
but fck their compliments & their butt fckn attempts,

especially when they & it comes with an underhanded advance
claiming to respect you just so they can fck you,
THH3 283 ∆
well fck that I’m gone sorry John you had your chance,
I’m gonna hit the road Jack, & no I’m not ever coming back,
got a fire in my heart that’s gonna help me blaze my own path,
& those that passed my gates without permission in the past,
can perish in the guilt & filth of their own crap,
action with misdirected decisions, there’s no excuse for that,
fck that I’m on a mission & no one can stop me now,

no one except myself so I get out of my own way,
refuse to continue to be a victim of my own indecisions,
& get used so I’m gone bye baby bye good night & good day,
it’s a new day,

& it’s gonna be glorious,
& yeah we’ve lose a few battles,
but I swear to God in this war we will be victorious,
as long as we’re not victims of our own indecisions,

& we refuse to be used or choose a Victim Mentality,
see what good is knowledge if you don’t apply wisdom,
I guess of Causal Consumerism I’m just another casualty,
as we all are, as you all were,

as we all lose complete control, while trying to keep it together.
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 284 ∆
Warning Shots [83]
Yo boy, step back, I suggest, you just chill,

back up if you know what’s good for you you will,
need my space get the fck outta my face it’s been a long day,
keep flirtin’ with the kiss of death, you might get yourself killed,
I don’t give a fck, I’m a muthafckn gangsta,

not Tupac but still claim Westside L.A.,
loyal to the streets in which I was raised,
not a b!tch, I don’t snitch, no how no way, so I say no names,
know some ‘jefes’ with street soldiers who obey orders loyally,
who take life for the right price & get the whole thing arranged,
I know some ‘eses’ a.k.a. Joses with whole plates of cocaine,
more guacamole than avocado farms grown with methane,
know some players, who’s names hang in the Hall of Fame,
some coaches too, don’t play the field but I’m still in the game,
don’t play by the rules, don’t have to it’s a whole new ballgame,
don’t be fooled by this smile on my face, I play, but not playin’,
not joking, don’t know what the riddle or the answer is,
hot smoking, hazardous as a cancer stick,
get in a fender bender with any of my mentors,
& we’re coming after you for costs plus damages,
too hot, even if you got handed it you couldn’t handle this,
you all are lost, can’t navigate, just kids, cabbage patch,
barely legal, amateurs, you sit wherever average is,
with a roster full of imposters what an embarrassment,
fake mobsters, no honor, no lobster, just imitation crab sticks,
THH3 285 ∆
that’s not an Sushimi that’s Surimi hidden in cheap packaging,
you’ve got connects at the mall we’ve got connects in politics,
y’all goners before even arriving, b!tch made lil fake baller kids
move b!tch get outta the way, this is grown man business,
got 99 Problems but you’re not one, not even significant,
I’m from the streets, skin looks bleached, yeah I’m white,
but I’d advise you don’t underestimate this cracka,
being caucasian doesn’t mean I won’t bash your face in,
if you act up, we’re all strapped up, & don’t play either,
nothin’ funny round this way boy, play with guns like play toys,
I’ve had guns in my face, more than once, not talkin’ One Time,
one time I looked straight down the barrel,
& warned them, “You’ve got the wrong guy.”,
waited patiently for a few weeks to go by,
till things got quiet then sicced the bloodhounds on them, no lie,
look man, everything I am is real, 24 karat gold on my neck,

don’t need a ghetto pass got a passport full of stamps,
got an army always ready to advance & a body full of tatts,
angel wings on my back, represents my lil sister that passed,
she’s my Guardian Arch Angel, she watches over me,
so I’m not scared of death, because she’s got my back,
actually I welcome such things, in the City of Angels,
where you could become one yourself at any moment,
born & raised, from Mulholland all the way to Compton,
got fam from Colombia to The Bay & they stay devoted,
THH3 286 ∆
from Cali, Colombia to Cali, California, no safety on,
always loaded, come on son, no need to test me,
do you know how many mouths I feed, how many families,
do you really think that any of these G’s that depend on me,
will let you cut off the hand that feeds, cracka please,
don’t be so naive, I’ve really been there, crack smoke & 40’s,
used to call crackheads that suck dick Five Dollar Shorties,
now our cars push start, we dress sharp, & don’t start beef,
see when you’re really from the streets,
& lucky enough to make it out you don’t want any part of beef,
I started with no money not even a dollar,

best part about becoming self made, is I’m not bothered,
or have to engage with losers, or waste time with broke lames,
don’t have to engage with haters, or quarrel with the hopeless,
I wrote this, as a warning & also as a lesson,
warning is don’t fck with us, unless you’re offering blessings,
lesson is you can make it too, if you drop that hating attitude,
& if not I’ve got gorillas in position to dish some beatings,
guys with monster hands, that will lift you up by your face,
then cave your whole skull in so don’t fck with us understand?
So yo boy, step back, I suggest, you just chill,

back up if you know what’s good for you you will,
need my space get the fck outta my face it’s been a long day,
keep flirtin’ with the kiss of death, you might get yourself killed..
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 287 ∆
We Now Are [84]
I’ll be the first to admit that we all harbor past regrets,

more than just a little bit of trauma for sure,
from The Mamas & The Papas, not talking the rock band,
talking sisters, brothers, friends, lovers, family & strangers,
& all the others that gave us these cuts & scars,
but as much as the past has amassed in our minds,
the past does not define who we now are,
a Self Determined Self Evident Expressive Testament.
We are, here together in an expressive space,

& no one really knows how to behave, so no judgments, okay?
Just be brave, you don’t always have to know how to behave,

especially if you were a slave back when the rules were made,
rules are made to be broken, so bend them, see if they break,
take this moment to thank every person that made heartbreak,
because they broke us open to reveal the real us showing,
now we let us be us as we are without being what we were,
this allows us to heal & restore,
let’s us return the balance to our nature,
lets us allow us to be healed, bestowed in these blessings,
we are not just passive observers, we are active participants,
& we’re almost there, to wherever that is,
so no more cares about any of it, enraptured in infinite bliss,
THH3 288 ∆
why hold to a memory that won’t let you free till you let it go,
not free ’til you let go, so off with your mask, on with our show,
may you & your loved ones be bestowed,

with all the beautiful blessings this world has to offer,
bountiful amounts more than one person could count,
get it all now while we’re still here because it’s almost over,
we’re almost there, wherever that is, let’s celebrate we made it,
it wasn’t easy but we did it & that fact should be celebrated,
we’re diamonds shining like suns, it’s fantastic,
we elevated from the bottom basement to the top of greatness,
& I’ll be the first to admit that we all harbor past regrets,
more than just a little bit of trauma for sure,
from The Mamas & The Papas, not talking the rock band,
talking sisters, brothers, friends, lovers, family & strangers,
& all the others that gave us these cuts & scars,
but as much as the past has amassed in our minds,
the past does not & did not, define who we now are,
Self Determined Self Evident Expressive Testaments,

elevated from the bottom basement to the top of greatness.
& now we are here together in an expressive space,

& no one really knows how to behave, so no judgments, okay?
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 289 ∆
Welcome Home [85]
Alone,
out cast in the in crowd,
808s & Heartbreaks, heartbeats & breakbeat sounds,
no stress, more Sunday Service West, less Watch The Throne,
Alone,
out cast in the crowd,
heart breaks & heart beats through breakbeat sounds,
sublime chants, war drums, & peace songs leading us home,
home, more of a fantasy, than a reality,

haven’t had a home, since I left my mother’s house at age 14,
as we, all march to the beat of the corporate war drums,
poetry, makes madness more bearable please spare a poem,
Instagram hashtags, the first lamb gets the last laugh,

epigrams & blood baths, emoji programs & Adobe Acrobats,
cronies post, posted as goalies, bad math makes three halves,
faux pas homies, phony ceremonies & bad acts,
empty proteins that claim to know things but don’t know jack,
don’t even know how to absorb whole foods just trans fats,
or know the whole story, just fake news & alternative facts,
meanwhile we know reality still exists, just not where it’s at,
see low key the Hokey is Pokey just exists to distract,

& we’re choking ‘cause Dopey’s stoned & his home is smokey,
THH3 290 ∆
hotboxed with 7 Dwarfs & 1 princess, no support or precepts,
the radar blipped, so just for sport we shot at a bogie,
& missed, didn’t hit, we’re a few sandwiches short of a picnic,
life’s a trip, chill a bit, let’s go half on a hoagie, no baloney,
because world’s in trouble & going vegan’s one way to save it,
seitan no Satan, you say you’re my homie act like my homie,
don’t befriend me then see me in reality & act like a stranger,
as we get lost further & further in a narcissistic virtual reality,
danger danger ranger ranger, we are all voyeuristic spies,
I post a poem about it all in totality, & only get like 50 likes,
she posts a picture of her ass in a swimsuit, & gets 50k likes,
I don’t get enough respect for the words I write,

but somebody has to keep our words alive,
as the walking dead, march to the corporate war drum,

I write poems about it all, nostalgic for futuristic postmoderns,
oh pardon, did I offend your common sense, well then,
you must be off balance with your oxymoronic opulence,
no one is innocent we’re all involved, all narcissistic voyeurs,

voyeuristic narcissists, caught up in polyamorous politics,
Demicans & Republicrats, it’s dirt poor verses filthy rich,
a Death Match & that’s fact but enough of this we’re over it,
let’s get back to you & me & that heart beats that jam,
THH3 291 ∆
& perform as the orchestra’s score of our Soul’s soundtrack,
holla back, give me a sign that there’s a Soul inside that shell,
The Ghost in The Sea Shell, The Devil in the details,
so professional even when we’re wingin’ it they can’t tell,
oh well, times up, & I’m down, already flew off the guardrails,
times up, I’m down, your high, like a gorgeous Nat Portman,
Your Highness, show me a sign that you’re still alive inside,
let’s see a wave of the hand or a sparkle of the eye,
so we can make this time we have the best time of our lives,
as we free dive freely into thee divine design,
all pre-existing prehistoric lines are redesigned & redefined,
life, in it’s prime, high, & alive,
alone,
out cast in the in crowd,
808s & Heartbreaks, heartbeats & breakbeat sounds,
no stress, more Sunday Service West, less Watch The Throne,
Alone,
out cast in the crowd,
heart breaks & heart beats through breakbeat sounds,
sublime chants, war drums, & peace songs leading us home,
so say goodbye, & Welcome Home…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 292 ∆
What Do You Have To Say For Yourself? [86]
Don’t tell me any more of these trivial distractions,

don’t bore me with any more stories you saw on TV,
don’t want to hear the latest gossip it’s all nonsense stop it,
who cares who’s dating who, personal lives’ are not news,
who cares who won whatever award, or won the Superbowl,
I don’t know at all & I don’t care anymore, never really did,
most things are just distractions from anything that’s relative,
what I’m interested in is the soul you hold in that body of yours,
so tell me, what really matters to you, what do you care about
I’ll tell you what, if you’re shy I’ll say what I care about first,
I care, about the greater good, about improvement of self,
I care, about how we’re going to heal this broken world,
I care, about how we’re going to heal these broken hearts,
I care, about what we’re going to do to fix this mess,
want to give my best, want to look back & say we did our best,
there I told you what I care about, now it’s your turn,
tell me something that truly matters, or leave me alone,
I’d rather be alone & at peace, then together & in war.
So let me be, at peace, with myself & all of my demons,

because I wan’t to release them but don’t know how,
so just leave me alone unless you can help me figure it out,
& don’t tell me any more of these trivial distractions,
because I’m trying to stay focused & not be distracted..
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 293 ∆
What’s Up? [87]
What’s up,
just wanted to let you know that I still love you,
because I know it’s been awhile,

some would even say forever, at least that's what it feels like,
but even forever feels like only a moment when you’re Endless,
as an Ageless Eternal Immortal Infinite Being living in Infinity,
tell me, what’s your truth,

why do you rise every day, what motivates your moves,
do you pray, if you do, how do you pray & who do you pray to,
how do you handle the hate & do you make room for the love,
& why do you struggle at all, I mean seriously what’s the use,
stress isn't worth the stress, especially if giving in is giving up,
so why subject yourself to events if they feel incorrect to you,
aren’t you sick of holding your ground & holding your tongue,
instead of this, take some time, take a breath, reflect, renew,

try to relax, find some perspective, & learn to listen to you.
We can forgive, instead of give up,

we've been misled, by the stimulants that we’ve been force fed,
to view material things as more important than human beings,
THH3 294 ∆
we worship inanimate objects like they have a life of their own,
that why we don’t look up at eyes we look down at screens,
checking Facebook, SnapChat, Instagram & Twitter tweets,
living vicariously in 3rd person through screens,
instead of living life in reality in 1st person as the real thing,
doing things not for the experience but for the likes it gets,
biggest vice is being guided by the eye of the Public's biases,
no eye contact just iContacts no connections except with wifi,
riding reckless on a superhighway with no licenses,
victims of our own timelines, traded sovereignty for notoriety,
what is society, what happened to Prince Ra & Princess Isis,
are the days of The God Ra & The Goddess Isis gone?
Where have the Gods gone?

Are all the Gods gone?
Are we living,
in a Post-Religion-Apocalyptic Epoch of Existence?
Everything’s possible I guess.
I guess,
either way it isn't worth the stress,
I guess just be blessed & let everything click & fall into place,
must confess we are the honest embodiment of much success,
THH3 295 ∆
& success comes, after lots of yes, so say yes, just say yes!
& hey Bless what’s up,

& all these words offer us up everything except apologies,

actually, fck it, apologies as well,
there, I said it, might as well say I'm sorry,
because it seems I've said just about everything else,
so, I apologize.
“I apologize on behalf of all men we messed up & I accept that,

but honestly we didn't know what we were supposed to do,
& please don't misconstrue this apology as an excuse,
because there’s no excuse for the way we gave all this abuse,
it's just we’re fatherless our leaders lacked commonsense,
& miscreants mislead us into thinking it’s cool to mistreat you,
lost our morals, all common decency, & our commonsense,
& you didn't bother to tell us because you're as lost as us too,
so on behalf of all men I apologize in all my honestness,
honestly we didn't know what to do see we’re as lost as you.”,
in this microcosm,
somewhat awesome mini-universe called Los Angeles,
& this much damage is difficult to bandage,
THH3 296 ∆
presents a challenge even for the oracle Paul Staments,
with all the most fun guys, all the most potent fungi,
& all the mycelium in the entire ecosystem of this universe,
in this mini-universe called Los Angeles,

where we lost our angel wings,
in a place where everything seems easy,
but then again nothing is what it seems,
navigating through the soulless glows of low neon egos,
plastic smiles, absent minded sidetracks, & high self esteems,
where good ideas meet bad company & they make a movie,
can sign a contract for millions but can't buy back dreams,
see its seems,

we are all sleepwalking in this day dream,
& truth be told sometimes all I want to do is walk down the hill,
I'm on from Mulholland to Hollywood Blvd. & scream,
“AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH HAHAHAHAHAH!”,
it must be so liberating to be a mad man,
but these days,

in most cases crazy is dismissed as lost,
meanwhile Madmen on Television make bad decisions,
portraying the American Dream slogan, “Money is Boss.”,
& therefore you should make more of it at all costs,
but what good’s made if while getting paid your soul gets lost?
THH3 297 ∆
What good is money, without peace of mind,
can’t escape yourself no matter how much money you make,
or how many drugs you take,
no matter how high you fly you can’t get away,
so even if you forget all of this due to short term memory loss,
remember that fact even if you don't remember your way,
see before I had money,

& I’d complain about inequality & they'd call me bitter,
& after I got mad money,
& complained about inequality they called me hypocritical,
well,
you can make some of the people happy all the time,
& all of the people happy some of the time,
but you can’t make all the people happy all the time,
ah well,
I never asked to be their abused Muse anyways,
nevertheless I became a slave to my art, consumed too soon,
& the same thing that had freed me made me enslaved,
& I've got so much more to say,

but I'm simply exhausted right now, can't continue to elaborate,
because it's been a long night, I’m terribly tired,
& just want to find a safe place to lay my head, what a day,
THH3 298 ∆
my God, what a day,
what a day it’s been,
feels like it’s been days since I’ve seen you,
lifetimes even,
so please come see me,

I've got so many reasons for you to visit,
& you've got not one reason not to,
so please come at once I insist that you come this instant,
come check in before we both check out,

& when you arrive I will only have one question & it's this,
“What's up?”,
What’s up,
because I know it’s been awhile,

some would even say forever, at least that's what it feels like,
but even forever feels like only a moment when you’re Endless,
as an Ageless Eternal Immortal Infinite Being living in Infinity.
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 299 ∆
Wheel of Fortune [88]
Up late again,
from up here I get a clear view,
night vision over LA, the lights twinkle as if to say,
“Remember kid this is the city that birthed you,
it’s a relationship of love & hate, one that you’ll ever escape,
even if you get away, you’ll return to the nest, you always do.
& as fate would have it it seems you’ve just returned today,
welcome back, you’ve returned to the nest, as you always do.”,
“How are you, are you enjoying the view?”,

& I must admit, from here on my mountain top, I do,
my Owl eyes see the whole wondrous panoramic world view,
The Valley, Hollywood, Santa Monica, DTLA too,
damn you, so Beautifully Damned, a thank you to R.M. Drake,
Beautifully Damned is his book’s name, hope it’s okay to use,
it’s also a G-Eazy song, but that came out after R.M.’s book,
wonder if G-Eazy thanked R.M. also, because he took it too,
either way we’re beautifully damned it’s true,

& people ask me if being a Hollywood Kid is worth the strife,
if the pain pays off, & I say the perks of the perils are the prize,
I feel it in my marrow, I see it in the sparkle of these city lights,
sparrow, to hawk, hawk to owl, so diverse yet they all fly,
awake way late, don’t ask me how, I’m always up late at night,
haters say it’s not poetry, because I make it look easy,
THH3 300 ∆
but this isn’t Wheel of Fortune, you can’t buy a vowel,
sorry pal, it’s not as easy as it looks to write these books,
well ok this is Wheel of Fortune, but you still can’t buy a vowel,
still have to work hard to make something look easy, look it up,
& once you’re in you can’t get out, so make your decision now,
throw in the towel, or get up with the owls, I’m up, I’m not out,
in this city that never sleeps, I’ve come from the bowels,
no city ever sleeps, sleep’s for mortals, we’re angels, oracles,
no creeps allowed, ciao bella, gonna get some rest on a cloud,
out on Cloud 9, don’t worry about me I’ll be fine, I’ll be back,
in the meantime I advise you heal if you can, everything hurts,

they say life’s a b!tch makes sense since she’s sure such a flirt,
curse, the heavens, bless, the heathens,

we came to The City of Angels, we all have our reasons,
’tis the season, without reason, I’m up late again,

from up here I get a clear view,
night vision over LA, the lights twinkle as if to say,
“Remember kid this is the city that birthed you,
it’s a relationship of love & hate, one that you’ll ever escape,
even if you get away, you’ll return to the nest, you always do.
& as fate would have it it seems you’ve just returned today,
welcome back, you’ve returned to the nest, as you always do.”.
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 301 ∆
When Angels Cry [89]
Not really here,

feeling removed & remote, making moves I can’t control,
remote controlled racing with nowhere to go, it’s weird,
feeling removed & aloof, doped & afloat,
not really here,

yet I’m Still Here like Joaquin Phoenix,
feeling like I left myself somewhere & forgot where,
now I’m here taking a break in this realty show post zenith,
not really here,

“Hello how have you been?”,
don’t mean to be a bother,
just thought I’d check in,
been feeling a bit numb lately,
wondering if you’ve been feeling the same,
just got back to L.A. this evening,
was greeted on arrival by the Rain,
wish it was Purple Rain instead it was just gray, RIP Prince,
he passed away & things haven’t been the same since,
RIP MJ, RIP Jimmy Carter, RIP Mac Miller,

RIP Tina Turner, RIP Nipsey, RIP Larry King,
RIP Stan Lee, RIP Stephen Hawking, RIP Bill Graham,
RIP Luke Perry, RIP Avicii, RIP The Queen,
THH3 302 ∆
& last but not least RIP XXXTentacion,
attention please, a moment of silence, may all rest in peace…
Rest In Peace.
Jeez there’s certainly been a lot of death lately,

so I thought I’d check in to see how you’ve been,
let you know I still love you & you can visit any time,
preferably before we’re both gone with the wind,
& until then I’ll continue writing these messages to you,

from the front lines to remind you can return anytime it’s okay,
attempting to share this wisdom I’ve found for your process,
without sounding too cliche or giving any sworn secrets away,
anyways, maybe none of this is that important anyways,
we’re all just visitors here, no one plans to stay,
& to be honest with you most don’t wishes to stay anyways,
soon we’ll leave here, so no I don’t plan to be here always,
won’t overstay my welcome, just stopped in to check in,
before we both check out, separate, &. go our separate ways,
even though I’m not sure what difference it will make anyways,
either way at the end of the day, we all just fade away,
maybe that’s why I feel like I’m not really here,

feeling removed & remote, making moves I can’t control,
remote controlled racing with nowhere to go, it’s weird,
feeling removed & aloof, doped & afloat…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 303 ∆
Whiplash ( Miles & Miles) [90]
One & two &…
From Miles Teller to Miles Davis,

from the Will Be’s to the Has Beens,
from Keaton’s Birdman to Valenti’s Birdland,
blood sweat &tears, healing music through hurt hands,
we will not just be great, but will become some of The Greats,
as long as we dedicate ourselves & put the work in,
even if that means sometimes putting some hurt in,
to get clean you’ve gotta use elbow grease plus detergent,
psycho cycles expressed musically & in tune intuitively,

truthfully, we need the pain to be in the poetry,
we need the Roman Romance as well as the Greek Tragedy,
it keeps things more interesting to say the least,
see sometimes the line in between fact & fiction disappears,
sometimes what defines an act & what is actual smears,
actually, whats the difference between, actor & spectator,
waking life & living dreams, fake courage & real fears,
joyous shouts & agonizing screams, take heed,
everything’s not as it appears to be, DeepFakes are here,
used to be The Grateful Dead now it’s the Russian KGB,
that’ll steal your face right off your head like an executioner,
from FaceApp to fake apps on Google play like UzbekChat,
makes us anxious we take Acid Jazz & Big Band for relief,
THH3 304 ∆
Birdman I’m Birdman, flying high to my destiny, getting dizzy,
Gillespie, so I land on The Tree of Life, Blood On The Leaves,
we’re Strange Fruit, no Nina Simones, just Divas with silicone,
everyone’s stoned like Emma Stone at Cinespia on Halloween,
trying to repair broken hearts from broken homes,
broken glass & broken dreams, best to tread carefully,
black widows, smashed windows with no window screens,
background’s all green screen, projecting Stranger Things,
no Edward Norton, nothing’s important, no hope to loan,
alone, in A Nightmare On Elm St., no one to keep us company,
except Wes Craven, a black raven & of course Freddy,
having American Dreams, like young Martin Luther Kings,
not Buddy Rich or a Fckn B!tch but kinda both, I’m everything.
No pain no gain, head first no toe dipping, hold your breath,

walk on egg shells pushed to the limit whole orchestra on edge,
like a ballerina on her tippy toes, balancing on a ledge,
trying not to slip in her slippers, & wind up dead,
or even worse, slip up get embarrassed, & wind up red,
it’s astonishing more people don’t jump off this cliff,
unstable behavior, high wired on a high wire without a savior,
it’s got to be a labor of love why else would we put up with it,
no second chances for those that are One Of a Kind,
one-off opportunities of a lifetime only come once in a lifetime,
it’s not a joke no lol, only JK is Simmons, it’s nerve-racking,
as the conductor cajoles the drummer drum rolls no guidelines,
THH3 305 ∆
as turned & tuned up confused students look on anxiously,
apprehensive classmates appear as prospective castrates,
tight shoes & open wounds, no Bandaids, just drum sets,
a rush of frets, high hats hit, cymbals clap, as the band plays,
snares & stars, awes & applause for those that dare,
to risk it all since all magnificent miseries are man made,
miseries made great, by the sweat of our insecurities,
it takes practice, talent isn’t everything, it’s just the axis,
it’s only appreciated when cultivated & applied furiously,
talent just allows us to become masters through practice…
One & two &…
I’m home sick, for a home I never had,

a runaway still running afraid, what the fck is that,
no mom or dad, so the only father figure I ever had,
was this manic conductor, & he’s completely mad,
& it’s a love hate relationship,
but all the best relationships are exactly that.
So feed me your abuses, because the ruthless truth is,

I use this to make the most beautiful music,
you’re either the total proof of this, or completely useless,
the truth is we use these abuses, as the glue for the music,
which makes the intuitive coolness that you all groove with,
time to shine, so if your cool as ice cream then let’s do this,
Walk The Line, between epic disaster & much success,
THH3 306 ∆
this is the ride of a lifetime, no rest until death…
One & two &…
In the pursuit of happiness, more Reznor than Will Smith,

in a Downward Spiral, with an upward direction,
see rejection hurts way worse when it’s of your own invention,
courage through fear, unclear intentions,
notes played off sheets of tension,
a faculty of casualties a comedy of tragedies,
we don’t always become what we thought we’d be,
but we always become what we had to be,
see, “I don’t want to be just great,
I want to be one of The Greats.”,
so I concentrate as I perspirate, am I rushing am I dragging,
how can I be in such a hurry yet still play delayed & be late?
Wait…
One & two &…
“That’s not my tempo!”, yeah well you’re totally mental,

but insane equals fame if you earn the correct credentials,
so I write notes until my fingers bleed, I break all the pencils,
& speed out of control, crash, & awake in a hospital,
hit fast at last, with nothing left except the Whiplash,
that’s how it goes, from cruise control to Whiplash scenario.
THH3 307 ∆
One & two &…
As brass bands play on we play pain right out the best of us,
put our faith in our instruments have no one else left to trust,
feels so good & so bad, we’re happiest when the most mad,
an orchestra of soloist redemption found in hopelessness…
One & two &…
My violent temper has been weaponized,

it has turned my drum sticks into big guns,
& it feels like it’s almost over, even though it’s just begun,
as a runaway it’s all about what I run to, not what I run from,
so I blackout, white hot, hearing nothing but my heart beat,
ba boom ba boom ba boom bum bum,
& that’s okay because I made,
my heart beat be the beat of my drums…
One & two &…
from Miles Teller to Miles Davis,

from the Will Be’s to the Has Beens,
from Keaton’s Birdman to Valenti’s Birdland,
blood sweat &tears, healing music through hurt hands…
One & two &…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 308 ∆
Widows [91]
Been hurt so bad, so many times before,

that I don't even know, what pain feels like anymore,
been stabbed in the back, so many times before,
that I don't even know, who's got my back anymore,
so fck it, let it all burn down to the ground, & as it burns,
we'll gather round, & tell Scary Stories like it's a Camp Fire,
Guillermo will bring s’mores, I'm a bad boy, with a good heart,
looking for a bad girl, with a good heart, Have You Seen Her,
someone who’s also been through it all also, & now is,
just looking for someone who accepts them just as they are,
I know this world feels like it’s burning up, but babe it’s cool,
because, Love, I accept you unconditionally, just as you are,
your flaws are not your fault, your scars are beauty marks,
your smile is a testimonial, your trauma makes beautiful art,
you can run to me, when you have nowhere else to run,
you can seek refuge here, shelter from the coming storm,
I welcome you with open arms, & a heart & home that’s warm,
always accepting, never neglecting deflecting or rejecting you,
you don’t even have to explain all that you’ve been through,
I already know, because I’ve been through it all too,
we’ve been hurt so bad, so many times before,
that we don't even know, what pain feels like anymore,
been stabbed in the back, so many times before,
that we don't even know, who's got our back anymore…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 309 ∆
Won’t Die Wondering [92]
Everyone I want to hold close,

is too far away,
can’t blame them for the distance though,
because it’s all my fault at the end of the day,
see the more I love someone,
the further I push them away,
& I know we may never speak again,
but there’s still so much more I wish to say,
& there’s so much more I want to express to you,

but not with words because everything’s already been said,
such an inquisitive mind you have,
so forward thinking yet with style that’s post modern vintage,
if our bodies are temples then tattoos are our hieroglyphics,
“Won’t Die Wondering”, reads your only tattoo,

& I wonder if the ink you wear that you carry everywhere,
in the words inscribed in the cinnamon skin on your side,
is your mantra because it perfectly matches your shaved hair,
also it’s a good motto that rings true & is a sign of the times,
what to do, two fortuitous souls spending time,
until there’s no more time left to spend,
& in the end I guess we can’t be surprised,
because we all know, all good things come to an end,
we both know we don’t have forever, so let’s not let us pretend,
THH3 310 ∆
let’s unravel Life’s magical mysteries while we still can,
let’s immerse ourselves in the diverse ambiance of Nature,
let’s put down the phones, embrace the unknown,
emerge in The Great Wide Open & choose our own adventure,
let’s get back to being us,

let’s let our eyes wander & our feet roam,
let’s make sure we “Won’t Die Wondering”,
let’s let those be words to live by until we live no more,
wonderful words,
united in a wonderful tattoo,
& you say you won’t leave me,
but I’ve got trust issues so I wonder if that’s actually true,
I’m sceptic, I’ll admit it, but if it’s true,
then I promise I will let go of all my abandonment issues,
so that I don’t push you away like every love before you,
& instead pull you close, embrace you like you do that tattoo,
won’t make the same mistakes I used to once I can trust you,
but until then everyone I want to hold close, will stay far away,
can’t blame them for the distance though,
because it’s all my fault at the end of the day,
see I told you before the more I love someone,
the further I push them away,
& I know we may never speak again,
but there’s still so much more I wish to say…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 311 ∆
Wonder Woman [93]
Oh man, Man has certainly caused too much hurt already,

from Founding Fathers, to embezzling Wall Street Brokers,
in every possible way, abused every position of power ever in,
even abused other men, especially in prison showers,
crossed every line, desecrated the divine feminine,

no one was spared even the Virgin Mary was deflowered,
turned natural leaders into anomalous submissives,
outgoing confident women into inward awkward cowards,
as the outrageously courageous became doubtful cowards,
Man hurts the same Ones that birthed him, how awkward,
how many wars have woman started,

how many drilling expeditions have been led by females,
guess it’s fitting that Men do the invading & the drilling,
intruding into other turf & Mother Earth, Devil’s in the details,
Men have a crave to invade, they enjoy entering everything,

like a Hermit Crab into a seashell with a Napoleon complex,
& I’m a Man, so I’m guilty by association, which is why I feel ill,
I am so ashamed, that I’m even embarrassed to have a penis,
I regret so much of Collective Man’s past aggressions,

it’s as if I’m having a past life regression filled with regrets,
holding guilt from the visions of my past bad decisions,
THH3 312 ∆
tired of bad decisions, I’ll never upset another set of breast,
tired of making decisions, tired of leading expeditions,

I’m tired of going to a beautiful place like a clear blue lake,
where instead of harmonizing when I arrive I just start fishing,
why this impulse to search for things & beings to take,
to catch beautiful things, to bait, then hook, then take them,
why do I think the meaning of life involves killing,
when we all know no problems will be solved if they involve,
forcefully taking the life of a living being that’s not willing.
What’s wrong with me, are all Men predators,

do all men, or at least most, want to conquer mountain tops,
hook fish & eat steak bloody rare, this blood lust is just fckt,
I view us with disgust, this forward progress is backwards,
I mean even this otherwise beautiful blank space here,
can’t be left alone without an impulse to add ink black words,
well blah blah blah, & hardy ha ha ha,

it’s so sad that I’ve gone mad, but hey I’m still glad,
because the home team’s still winning rah rah rah,
got all the trophies, all the glory, all the power, all the fame,
all the Women have been laid, all the Beasts have been slayed,
all the Money’s been made, all the Players have been paid,
So what? So what now?
Now that all lands have been conquered, all awards acquired,
THH3 313 ∆
all mountains climbed, & all the battles won?
Now what? What now?
I’m King Don Juan Gangsta Baller Man, KDJGBM for short,
I got girls at every club, & players on every court,
So what?
Got gold chains,

& money wads wrapped in rubber bands,
got a flashy car complete with beige leather trim,
it’s fitting the skin of a cow wraps around the ride that I’m in,
given that we’ve killed the Holy Cow to get the cream,
because we don’t hold anything sacred anymore,
well nothing except for the All Mighty Dollar,
made all this money but don’t know what we made it all for,
I guess we made more money to make more war,

treated fellow Men as enemies & fellow Women as whores,
I guess absolute power does corrupt absolutely,
& at the end of the day really what was it all for,
because once we’ve neglected every Woman in our life,

& treated wrong every Woman that ever treated us right,
& we’re home alone dying inside with no one by our bedside,
who will we run to nurse us back to health & hold us tight?
THH3 314 ∆
Who will come to our side, that’s right, likely a woman,
& we can accept them without having to understand them,
Men have done enough bad already it’s time for some good,
Women are meant to be accepted not understood no question,
& I know I’m ready to surrender & let Women have control,
so I open up, surrender, let Love conquer & let the Feminine in,
because, it’s time for some healing,

the kind that’s not going to come from the Masculine,
see the only way we’ll collectively heal our humanity fruitfully,
is with the Most High power of The Divine Feminine,
it’s finally time to let Women lead whether we admit it or not,

I’m not talking the likes of Lohan, Lopez, Palin or Megan Fox,
I’m talking the likes of Oprah, Rosa, Ardern & Amelia Earhart
because I no longer trust us men to keep dear what we’ve got,
I mean Men are reason we’re in the mess we’re in now,

so let’s not fool ourselves into thinking Man can get us out,
Man has already caused too much hurt certainly,

from Founding Fathers, to embezzling Wall Street Brokers,
crossed every line desecrated the divine feminine in every way,
Man hurts the same Ones that birthed him, how awkward…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 315 ∆
Words [94]
Fck these words,

no one really reads much anymore anyways,
thought we were on the precipice of a Literary Renaissance,
but I was wrong we’re all too far gone to honestly care,
fck these words,

should’ve just shot a porn in HD,
maybe then I could hold your attention, at least until you come,
would hopefully be long enough to get these thoughts into you,
fck these words, maybe I should rephrase that,

make love with these words, yeah it feels better to say that,
but I’ve never been one to sugar coat things,
so fck it, fck these words, fck politically correct,
Donald Trump won the election, still nothing’s changed,
except instead of being a symbol of freedom & respect,
our country is the butt of a bunch of bad racist jokes,
but most folks are too morally broke to pay attention or notice,
we’ve gone numb,

so used to murders on the big screen & real mass shootings,
when our own character is assassinated we don’t even blink,
we just shut our eyes, we’ll bring flowers to the funeral,
but we won’t tell them we love them while they’re still alive,
we’ll write them a beautiful eulogy once they’re dead,
but won’t write them a useful letter while they’re still living,
THH3 316 ∆
we’ll share pictures in memory of but won’t visit in life,
lost my adopted father, saw his wife & daughter cry,

missed 2 holiday seasons, only came to see him after he died,
honestly it’s hard to feel connected to a black casket,
so I blocked out the white noise while I read his eulogy,
then I flew back to Hollywood after the 21 gun salute in DC,
didn’t even spend a single night with the family to mourn,
let alone the standard mourning period of 40 days,
since I’m a narcissist thinking the world revolves around me,
but I am not the Sun, I am barely even a son,
still I think I’m someone somewhat important,
because I pimped my words & thousands read my verses,
whored my words so the world would read my naked verses,
not even sure this abundance of recognition is deserved,
it’s absurd, so over it so fck these words, fck these fckn words,
I swear to God I’ll shut my MacBook for good,
pull that trigger & open my mind maybe then I’ll be understood,
shock therapy, self promotion,

suicide doesn’t answer any questions,
but it sure is an all-inclusive simple solution,
thought Pop Poetry was gonna be the answer,
but it was just more questions, pollution in my atmosphere,
attention span short as a Mayfly’s life,
is there anything I can write that will make anyone care,

seriously, I’m asking a serious question,
THH3 317 ∆
share a few moments of your time with me,
& in return I’ll give you my entire eternity,
my heart’s on fire, it’s burning me, need some fresh air,
need some new hope, need to not need any needs anymore,
I am a fckn whore, I thought I told you that before,
we all are in our own ways, that’s the reality of this world,
& I try & write to find redemption from my internal conflicts,

while still being honest, because I’ll sleep with a prostitute,
then donate a thousands dollars to a deserving charity,
I’m an unbearably uncontainable contradiction of virtues,
writing the madness of us all on behalf of us all,
with the urgency of a conductor, train careening off the track,
flying over the edge of a mountain cliff in slow motion,
getting out the final proses before it’s all over for all of us,
so skip the foreplay & just fck these words, fck them hard,
until you’re sweating out all your pores, until you’re coming,
over & over again with these words, until you become,
overly sensitive from overstimulation & you beg for no more,
until we are both exhausted,
laying there in the thick humid silence of a passed moment,
staring up at forever, light at the end of our tunnel vision bright
everything blurs, we become memories of our past selves,
& all that’s left are these words…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 318 ∆
WTF [95]
WTF,
feels like everyone’s on coke, Coca-Cola, Cocaine,
as if they’re going O.T. in the 80’s at a Miami Beach Disco,
slingin’ raw keys singin’ off key, “I’m in love with the coco!”,
I mean I think but I’m not totally sure, so I don’t actually know,
but I do know it sold at local pharmacies long before Pablo,
years ago grams went for 25 cents, without a prescription,
at any drug store in the USA, & it was top 5 of all drugs sold,
plus the original recipe for Coca-Cola contained cocaine,
now Coca-Cola is the world’s most recognizable logo,
makes sense since the CIA collaborates with Narcos,
it seems obvious even though I don’t have any evidence,
but I mean have you seen American Made, Narcos, or Blow?
I suspect with no evidence, that’s the definition of conspiracy,

a cocaine, coca-cola neo con liberal conspiracy,
left wing right wing, still flying the same plane, plot on repeat,
Barry Seal running CIA guns & Medellin coke simultaneously,
ever consider why they’re called Neo-Cons, just think,
it’s ironic to say the least, Con-men, Con-victs, Con-spiracy,
trying to be discrete getting covers blown like DEA agent Kiki,
networking in costumes dressed up like ComicCon celebrities,
run around cracking jokes to earn enough trust to make busts,
everyone’s crying in this comedy, laughing in this tragedy,
corrupt politicians with coked out egos & smoked out libidos,
making backroom deals under the table’s of high society,
THH3 319 ∆
as grown men lust after an assortment of addictions,
usually it’s not lust for another, it’s lust for the money,
All Seeing Eye sees you spending, you are The Illuminati,
so stop looking everywhere else for the conspiracy,
because you are the man in the mirror,

& the answers to your questions couldn’t be clearer,
take a moment, breathe,
then take a good look at yourself, now do you see clear?
All you have to do is realize, look, if a criminal passes a law,

even if wrong, the criminal isn’t a crook if he plays by the book.
WTF?
Exactly,
I have connections, to billions,
I’ve never heard of a more out of control Reserve,
break previous records & shatter all glass ceilings,
see when, there’s money to make & sky high stakes,

they’ll battle for control through war & debate, wait,
I’m off track, let me get back,
to the multi-millionaires, their stacks, & the fact, that,
there are 2 thousand Billionaires, worth 7.3 trillion out there,
yeah what do you think about that, do the math on that,
add it up & when you become as amazed as me,
go ahead & get right back, back to the track,
back to the record, record breaking stats,
THH3 320 ∆
155 new Billionaires this year, that’s a record breaking fact,
in fact, average Billionaire owns 3 billion, do the math on that,
& when you become as amazed as me, get right back,
nothing is as definitive as white & black,
not even white & black…
WTF,
I mean I think but I’m not totally sure, so I don’t actually know,
I suspect with no evidence, that’s the definition of conspiracy,

a cocaine, coca-cola neo con liberal conspiracy,
where all modern media in every form,
books, music, art, film, dance, poetry,
is promoting a way of life that can only support,
a very small percentage of humanity,
& as much as I don’t want to admit it, I’m in that percentage,
not because I have a Billion, but because I have access to it,
that’s truth, with no attitude, just truth, with,
facts you can use, with, power can you have just don’t abuse it,
because absolute power CAN corrupt absolutely,
but there’s exceptions to every rule at least usually,
& again that’s the truth truthfully, in the midst of,
a cocaine coca-cola neo liberal conservative conspiracy,
where war profits transform into more stock options,
clubbing to a soundtrack written by entertainers,
THH3 321 ∆
we sing, we dance, we put on a show,
but really we’re psycho & dangerous,
so don’t fck with us, unless you’re in love with us,
the meek may inherit the earth but or now it’s the innovators,
& we continue to innovate whether they love or hate us,
& yes it’s outrageous, but I’d rather be a sinner than a traitor,
which is why I’d never trade places with Brittany Kaiser,
so show me your papers, haters dissolve like wet toilet paper,
as all False Images of Man melt into vapors,
saviors of greater merit symbolized in Lions & Owls,

of course there’s is no denying that this is extra dangerous,
but we both know the only thing truly guaranteed is death,
so until then we cover our tracks & our trail stays paperless,
advertise, your pain upon this canvas,

ask the questions give the answers,
wrath of Cain has come upon us, not religious or an actor,
not a banker, but a gambler, find me in these chapters,
hundreds to choose from, steps up the corporate ladder,
fall forwards spring back add words backwards,
no rabbi, or pastor, just green grass in greener pastures,
oh pardon me, let me mind my manners,
not here to brag, or sound like a pompous pretentious prick,
but if the American Dream was a being, I’d probably look like it,
& I give my all, so I don’t need to quit,
& I’ve got my balls, so I don’t need your d!ck,
never giving in, when attracting dividends,
THH3 322 ∆
so if you want that money take that hit,
that’s what I needed to do way back when so that’s what I did,
now I’m a capitalistic mystic gifted with intrinsic linguistics,
Confessions of an Economic Hit Man is not fiction,
high as Falcon 9, & don’t even do drugs,

other than black coffee & maybe some red wine,
still I feel exceedingly drugged, yet strangely fine,
find, myself back up on that line,
on that line, take a hit pass it quick, what is yours is mine,
never give up, never give in, WTF, life is only time,
tic toc, tic toc, tic tac toe,

blindfold, swimming pool, Marco Polo,
yea I hear you, those words when you talk,
but I’m only paying attention if you’re talking bank notes,
because time is money, tic toc, tic toc, tic tac toe,
hut hike go, WTF, ON WITH THE SHOW!
WTF,
I mean I think but I’m not totally sure, so I don’t actually know...
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 323 ∆
Yes, I Dance In Yesterday’s Tomorrow [96]
She doesn’t even know I dance,

only because I’ve learned to hide it so well,
thanks to the combination of appall, insecurities & fatigue,
that I’ve acquired over the years from hands I’ve been dealt,
assorted mental shocks, betrayals, & emotional injuries,
a bewildering mix of victimized innocence & criminal guilt,
now I keep my heart hidden instead of wearing it on my sleeve,
don’t want to risk getting hurt again or hurting anyone else,
I keep my passions hidden, so she doesn’t even know I dance,

scared to be bitten, might Snap!, still Rhythm is a Dancer,
an addiction, a snake charmer, moving faster & faster,
she’s got the venom & the dagger, to pierce my heart’s armor,
she’s like a serpent but warmer, no boa constrictors,
more of a cobra, that stays sober with business,
denying these pythons in nylon access at all cost,
heard it all, so they can’t wrap her up with one lined pickups,
as for me, I might be a viper but would never strike her,

might be the remedy they need for these toxic enemies,
medicine to defend against the poisons in these city streets,
can’t call it, I’m offline, all lit, it’s a vibe thing, I’m busy vibrating,
go ahead & blame the boy in us for being so boisterous,

& industrious enough to avoid the poisonous cottonmouths,
these days can’t trust these snakes, more Chimera than Ciara,
THH3 324 ∆
as the World floods we just keep Burning Down the House,
in a constant state of affairs with other Talking Heads,
caught up in the nostalgia of Yesterday’s tomorrows,
we realize this life we live is ours,

that’s why we have everything except doubt,
so we’re outside running wild laughing out loud Baha ha,
while they’re still wondering Who Let The Dogs Out,
we run in the sun, swim in the ocean,

& make moments, so hopefully we’ll be remembered,
even though I’ve got a terrible memory, & you probably do too,
you know memory is a funny thing, two sides to every truth,
well actually there’s 3, but I don’t think anyone is counting,

because at this point in time, just happy we’re not drowning,
ship so heavy, sea so stormy,

we fear we might go overboard, & sink into unfounded glory,
so what’s the moral to this story,

what’s the lesson in this song,
I guess it’s to remember I still love you,
even though I know I was wrong,
so when they notice we’re gone,

& ask where we went,
THH3 325 ∆
tell them we were here in this moment,
& now we’re gone with the wind,
moving,
like the hottest God or Goddess that’s ever been,
call me Quetzalcoatl with vocal quotes filled,

within the pages placed into the Mind of our collective history,
Akashic Records let God be Our Witness,
we are Living History,
we are not only everywhere, we are also everything,
everyone,
that’s ever read or wrote the written word,
will understand that this life we live,
is nothing more than a noun mixed with a verb,
a fleeting moment of emotional memory,
everything all at once, forget everything, except I love you,
slash my wrist, birth no kids, no labels, no lies, no ifs,
no other way, no alternative facts, only one truth,
& the truth is, if only I was a bit more confident, I’d let you in,
& show you how amazing I can be when I feel safe,
but I’m too scared, I told you before, I’m unsure, I’m insecure,
so I stay shy & guarded, having doubts instead of faith,
& that’s why she doesn’t even know I dance,
& why instead of taking a chance I just take myself away…
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 326 ∆
You Are An Ocean (I Am A Seashell) [97]
Seashells communicate like emails,

letting you know there’s a message at your home like doorbells,
put your ear to the conch shell tell me what song you hear now,
every man an island every woman an ocean with strong swells
we are all only energy & energy can’t be created or destroyed,
so when, from me my body’s energy is expelled,
it doesn’t mean I’m gone, just means I’ve gone somewhere else,
& if you want to hear me breathe, just pick up a sea shell,
seashells communicate like emails,

& do so quite well, but what do they teach,
well for one, they teach that the Universe is in everything,
comparable to how the sea is in ever shell on the beach,
believe,
we are all seashells we dwell in still waters that run deep,
we don’t hold the ocean, but we do hold the ocean within us,
& no matter how dark the depths are where we rest,
or how deep we sleep when we drift off unconscious,
one day we’ll resurface & land on the beach, sun upon us,
exposed, fresh out the water, dripping, next to the jellyfishes,
& inspiring as that is & as much as it makes me want to write,
I’m tired & think for the night my poetry is finished,
& I’d love to go out in a blaze of glory before I’m done,

by saying something here that is epically moving & great,
THH3 327 ∆
to change humanity for the better & help the planet get saved,
I fear these are the same old stories, just told different ways,
still I write, listen to the sound of the waves, & have faith,
they say you can hear the ocean in a seashell, so wait,
before you go hold your ear to this seashell & listen,
so you can remember, I’ll always be out there somewhere,
a poet’s words will always be, even when the poet’s missing,
so don’t miss him, I know, easier said than done here,
just the thought of him gone makes you want to kiss him,
can’t not miss him but don’t kiss him even under pressure,
he’s not your lover, he’s a grown man & you’re a lone girl,
this isn’t a lust that’s momentary, this’s a love that’s forever,
there are other affectionate gestures that’re better,
best to be friends friends last longer than those you lust after,
let’s be sisters & brothers let’s be pen pals that send seashells,
let’s be each other’s rock when the seas get rougher,
let’s be each other’s sails when we think we’re going under,
& even if we’ve never met & never meet again,

better believe we are each exceptional,
unique as a snowflake, or better yet unusual as a seashell,
been waiting to exhale, breathe now, it’s okay you’re free now,
exhale & reveal we are both ocean & seashell,
devoted, even if our platonic relationship is only over emails,
it’s okay because seashells communicate like emails, so,
if I go & you want to hear me breathe just pick up a seashell.
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 328 ∆
Your Story To Tell [98]
What trauma do you hide,

behind that fine smile of yours,
please share because you hurtin’ is both our burden to bare,
may have gone through separate issues, but we jointly endure,
see with trauma mine isn’t exclusively mine,
& yours isn’t exclusively yours,
we all have dirty laundry growing mold that needs cleaning,

so air it out, we’re all on the same boat, there's no need to hide,
let's meet when we’re both hanging our laundry out to dry,
outside in a field of dreams between the clothing lines,
we can lay there & share our traumatic secrets in private,
while our clothes air out, backs on the grass & eyes to the sky,
dry clothes & catch rainbows from the enlightening sunlight,
it’s gonna be alright, you can tell me what trauma you hide,
what trauma do you hide,
& what trauma do you not,
& what trauma has already been brought to light,
manifested in the form of drama & other honest facades,
& how have years of damage managed to affect you so much,

that when those closest get offended you aren’t even shocked,
got EPTSD, Emotional Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder,
from a war of words, my God, it’s worse than we thought,
see a finite quote can have an infinite amount of meaning,
THH3 329 ∆
the same statement can be perceived in multiple ways,
an understatement would be to say we’ve been through a lot,
& as a result we have it all, at every meal, we say our grace,
plate full, at the top of the top, still they keep bringing us more,
another top off, another bottle brought, it just doesn’t stop,
but in order to finish something, first you have to start,
need to let go of who we were, to be who we are, so bring it on,
tell me your story, how did you find yourself here,
please express to me your everything & express without fear,
only way to get through the fog, is to be absolutely clear,
so tell me your version of the events that led you to here,
in 1st person, speak your mind & your truth, of your self,
in your own words, please be sincere & absolutely clear,
communicate, straightforward & openly, so that hopefully,
we heal, reveal, restore the Love we hope for & know is there,
& these wounds don’t continue to fester once they’re revealed
open fully it’s okay you’re safe, just us & our clothes this field,
let the Sunshine in, en route to The Fifth Dimension,

it’s a new dawn, even if you’re not an Aquarius,
bleach the bones brought from the skeletons in your closet,
I’m open to anything you have to say, as long as it’s honest,
tell me what trauma you hide behind that fine smile of yours,
tired from carrying around all that weight on your chest,
tired from running out of time, it’s time to express & confess,
so we can finally relieve the weight on our chests relax & rest.
Δ LaLux Δ
THH3 330 ∆
Yours Truly [99]
Yeah, I know, I haven’t written you a love letter in awhile,

so here you go, another love letter, Signed Sealed & Delivered,
easy to write but tough to read, love is blind like Stevie Wonder,
either way whatever the case may be rest assured it’ll get there
whether as a message in a bottle, or tied to a carrier pigeon,
hope it arrives in time so you’re still there to get the message,
even paid the extra & sent it Priority because it’s important,
so whether snow, rain, heat, or gloom of night, it’ll be delivered,
don’t want the letter to return with the note: Return To Sender,
so I send you this love letter, by all means necessary,

an infatuated reminder, that even though I’m not around,
I still love you, I see you out there growing, & I’m still waiting,
steadfast as a statue, for the day you’re ready to come home,
to you, this love letter is sent to, from me, it is sent from,
look at you, what a beautiful being you’ve become,
you’ve grown so strong, your aura is enormous now,
an accomplished Goddess you bless the earth you tread upon,
so go, or stay, come here, or go away, either way I love you,
always have always will absolute & unconditional,
& I know we don’t see each other, much as we ideally should,

but we don’t live in an ideal world, though we probably could,
probably would if we spent more time with each other,
please be so kind as to accept this love letter if you would,
THH3 331 ∆
it’s okay postage is pre paid, wrote it in hopes that you’d read it,
if you do & choose to come back this time, I promise I will stay,
I’ve learned that to let you go was one of my biggest mistakes,
still think about you often, especially when the earth quakes,
when the tides rise, you were the metronome for my heartbeat,
I was so naive leaving you was the catalyst for my heartbreak,
feel your presence everywhere see your essence in everything,

I feel you, constantly, I know all to well that you’re struggling,
made it this far but you gotta lose some battles to win the war,
gotta travel far to find what’s inside, that’s why we often are,
on opposite sides of the globe wrapped up in other lover’s arm,
& as ill as that makes me feel, it’s chill it’s cool I’m not alarmed,
no matter how much they pull they can never pull us apart,
since their stress is not our stress & their trouble isn’t ours,
we’re too blessed to stress, humans don’t concern us stars,
& regardless of all else I’ve got you, have since the start,
& yeah, I know, I haven’t written you a love letter in awhile,

so here you go, another love letter, Signed Sealed & Delivered,
easy to write but tough to read, love is blind like Stevie Wonder,
either way whatever the case may be rest assured it’ll get there
because this is unconditional love,
so no matter what, I will always be yours…
- With Love, Yours Truly,
Δ Aaron LaLux Δ
THH3 332 ∆
Δ
See I knew I would go,

I told you before everyone is targeted,
terminated, no Terminator, but like Arnold,
“I’ll be back.”, like I just started this…
THH3 333 ∆
THH3 334 ∆

THHT3: The Hollywood Hills Trilogy 3 Dark Lights - Bright Shadows

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THH3 1 ∆

THE HOLLYWOOD HILLS TRILOGY VOL 3

DARK LIGHTS | BRIGHT SHADOWS

Cover Art By:

Aaron’s Thank You’s:

I’d like to give a big shout out to anyone out there

I am forever grateful to you all. Please know that

Much Love & Respect. -Aaron

1) pub. 10/10/14; The Poetry Trilogy Vol. 1

2) pub. 2/2/15; The Poetry Trilogy Vol. 2

3) pub. 6/6/15; The Poetry Trilogy Vol. 3

4) pub. 7/7/16; The HH Trilogy Vol. 1:

5) pub.11/11/16; The Holy Trilogy Vol. 1:

6) pub. 5/5/17; The HH Trilogy Vol. 2:

7) pub. 7/7/17; 777:

8) pub. 12/12/17; The Sydney Sessions:

9) pub. 8/8/18; The Holy Trilogy Vol. 2:

10) pub. 9/9/19; The HH Trilogy Vol. 3:

All rights reserved.

'The Hollywood Hills Trilogy Volume 3:

Copyright © 2019 by Aaron LaLux

First International Edition ISBN: 978-1-950780-02-0

Manufactured in The United States of America

This book almost didn’t happen. That’s right.

I fell into a black hole, became very depressed, started

However, amidst the desperation I found hope. At a party in

What I learned was the always difficult yet infinitely invaluable

That’s All For Now.

Still Living One Day At A Time, Day By Day, Word By Word,

With Love & Respect, Loyally Yours,

As the founder of the sub-genre Pop Poetry it’s time I clear a

I’m the founder/inventor/creator of Pop Poetry. I started

The above example references the song title, ‘Purple Rain’,

2.) Pop Poetry references different aspects of pop culture,

Alright, there you go, Anything else, just ask.

Based on A True Story…

99 Heartbeats & Heartbreaks

get the fck out of your shells,

especially when it all stems from our own perception of Self,

it’s voluntary, so just because someone says they know me,

my God, all blessed, no more sins, no more stress,

it’s time to get the fck out of your shells,

We’re riding, shining too bright to be hiding,

my life is based on a true story,

used to ride dirty, in a hybrid with my eyes red,

used to use the pen as a sword,

sorry that I’m not sorry if I dissed you,

listen, we’re livin’ in the future not askin’ for permission,

we’re importing important portions that’re just enormous,

probably heard that before,

rewritten but not flea bitten, see there’s a real difference,

‘cause people know those lines are mine, albeit subliminally,

I guess that’s what happens when your work outgrows you,

heading north on America’s most west coast road,

racin’ with Jaden we ride out to my Topanga hideout,

& that’s why we’re riding, shining too bright to be hiding,

this is our world, so it’s our responsibility to save it…

I don’t write because I want to, it’s not exactly pleasurable,

this whirlwind life that’s such a rush of blurs it’s obscured,

but in the sauce of all that awesomeness,

Though it seems these days we’ve got it all backwards,

kinda like when you think it’s me that you’re holding,

I write these soulful love letters, to our future past selves,