June 7, 1922

This summer I want to keep a journal of my adventures and to see how my life

changes over the next few months. This is something I’ve been wanting to do ever

since I got to New York and I feel today is the day to start. I threw my first party of

the summer and so many people showed up, but yet I am still sad. The one person I

wanted to see so badly was nowhere to be seen. I am trying to find one person, and

I hope to see this person at one of these parties. I will continue to throw parties until

the day she comes to one of the parties. Daisy, my old lover, is that person. One

day I will write about her, but not today, as I am too sad that she did not come to the

party. I didn’t interact with many people, as I waited to see her face amongst the

party guests. Maybe she was there and I missed her, or maybe she had plans

already for tonight. Tomorrow is a new day with new possibilities and there will be

more parties, fingers crossed I shall see her at the next one. “He [I] stretched out his

[my] arm towards the dark water in a curious way,” (Fitzgerald 20).

A picture from my party.

Taken in my dining room.

 June 14, 1922

Another week gone and another party thrown, and still no Daisy. As much as I am

discouraged, I bring good news! Two of Daisy’s friends came to the party, one by

the name of Miss Jordan Baker, and the other by the name of Mr. Nick Carraway.

Nick lives right next door and served in the war. We began talking and he must not

have known I was Jay Gatsby, as he asked me if I knew where he was. He felt

embarrassed not knowing, to which I responded, “I though you knew, old sport. I’m

afraid I’m not a very good host,” (Fitzgerald 48). When Jordan told me Nick was

related to Daisy, I was ecstatic and tried my hardest to contain my excitement. My

plan could work, it could actually work! There is much to do though, and I need to

befriend Nick for this to happen. Jordan and I talked a lot when I found her in the

crowd. Her and I talked for hours on creating the perfect plan. The conversation

ended with Nick inviting Daisy over to his house, and me being his friend shall join

them. I am not sure how Jordan and Nick know each other, maybe they are lovers,

but my goodness is it a blessing for me! I left her to get Nick on board with our plan.

I want to work with him, so I won’t push him too hard, but this is the safest way for me

to finally see Daisy again.

Me, Jordan, Nick, and

some other guests at the

party.
June 22, 1922

There is so much to do I can’t believe what is about to happen. Nick came up to me

and said, “I’m going to call up Daisy tomorrow and invite her over here to

tea,” (Fitzgerald 82). I wanted to make sure that day suited him, and it did. I have

to buy food, I have to decide on clothes, I have to cut the grass, and that’s just a few

of the many things I need to do. I did not truly believe I would be able to see her.

I’ve wanted to for so long, so many painful weeks of not seeing her, that turned into

months, that turned into years. I’ve dreamt about how we would meet and how our

love for each other would be revived. I’ve wanted nothing more of her than to have

her come back to me with open arms. Each night I would lay down and just imagine

a world with me and her. One of my favorite scenarios is me and her sitting under a

tree by a lake with my arms around her and her head laid back against my chest. I

would rest my chin on top of her head and we would watch the sun set behind the

trees on the other side of the lake. We used to do this, before the war. We would be

able to talk about our lives, our hopes, our insecurities. Maybe when we have tea,

this alternate world I’ve been dreaming about, the only thing that has me living, can

start to finally come true.

Me asking Jordan if I can

speak to her privately

June 23, 1922

This day has been an absolute rollercoaster, and the weather was quite the same. I

started off by sending someone to go mow Nick’s grass, it was in dire need for a trim

and was not presentable for Daisy until it got trimmed. Once that was out of the way

I had to clean my house. I want Daisy to come over after tea to see my house,

hopefully to aid in winning her back. Everything was set perfectly for her, then I got

dressed. I could not decide on an outfit for hours, but finally I found once that I

believe was perfect. I got to Nick’s feeling confident, but each passing minute made

me more anxious than the last, and I feared Daisy wouldn’t come at all. I got up to

leave before Nick said, “Don’t be silly; it’s just two minutes to four,” (Fitzgerald 85).

Then we heard Daisy coming. Nick went out to greet her and I hid. Everything was

spinning so fast because everything was happening too fast. All I could think about

was the fact I was finally going to see Daisy again. I was not sure if I would be ready

for this, how will she react? How different will things be? How will she react to a

new me? Would she still love me? Does she even remember me? All of these

questions would be answered in a matter of seconds and I could not control myself.

Me getting anxious about if

Daisy will show up to tea

or not.
June 24, 1922

I had fallen asleep yesterday writing my entry, exhausted from such an emotional

day. I shall continue my story, because there was so much to write about I couldn’t fit

it into one day. Daisy walked in and I felt everything stop. I couldn’t even formulate

a sentence to say I was so mesmerized by seeing her in the same room as me. Things

were awkward at first, especially when I knocked over Nick’s clock. I’m going to

have to repair it, but that’s not a worry. Embarrassed by knocking over the clock, I

ran to hide in the kitchen. I was so overwhelmed by seeing her and not being able to

talk to her like I used to made me hide. Nick knocked some sense into me and I

slipped out of the kitchen to talk to her. My palms were sweaty when I walked

towards her. I sat down next to her and said, “How have you been?” She

responded, “I’ve been good, and you?” I replied, “It’s better now that I get to finally

see you again.” Her mood changed and I could see tears forming in her eyes. I got

out of my chair to comfort her, but before I could say anything she said, “I’ve missed

you so much Jay. I miss what we had before the war.” I took her and and nodded.

“Let’s go back to what we had. We can still be us, and what we had can become

what we have.” She shook her head in disagreement and said, “But Tom is my

husband.” And started crying more. She wept until Nick came out of the kitchen and

said, “It’s stopped raining,” (Fitzgerald 89).

Nick’s clock that I broke.

June 28, 1922

I am still blown away by that day I mean my goodness that was four days ago.

I had to make sure the next part actually happened before I wrote about it, because

it felt so surreal. I took Daisy to my house, to show off my greatness, and when we

left Nick’s she cried out, “That huge place there?” (Fitzgerald 90). I told her about

my parties and all the fun celebrities who come to them. When we got into my house

and walked around we came across my cabinets filled with shirts, so I tossed them off

the balcony for amusement. Then I heard Daisy sob from below, “They’re such

beautiful shirts.” (Fitzgerald 92). Then we came across my painting of my late friend

Dan Cody. He was a marvelous role model and an even better friend, I miss him

dearly. After this we continued to look around my house and then I had a marvelous

idea, let’s play some music. I called up Kilspringer to play the piano for Daisy. We

sat together and listened to the piano, it felt like just me and her, like before the war.

I do not know if Nick stayed for this, or if he left, but I was not concerned with him, to

me it was me and Daisy.

Kilspringer playing the

piano for me and Daisy.

July 2, 1922

I threw my third party of the summer today and I determined to make it the best party

of summer. Daisy came, unfortunately with Tom. I wanted her to have a fun night

and I think I failed to do that. The parties were supposed to bring her and I closer

together. But now that her and I have been in communication, I do not know what to

do. I think I am done throwing parties, since they are failing to do what they were

meant to do. I did dance with her though, but the fox trot can only do so much to

make a lover enjoy a party. I showed Daisy and Tom all of the celebrities in

attendance. Tom felt out of place, so to make him feel better I told everyone that he

was a world renowned polo player. He got upset at this, which I found amusing.

After the party I pulled Nick aside and stammered, “She didn’t like it, she didn’t have

a good time. I feel far away from her, it’s hard to make her understand,” (Fitzgerald

109). Nick reassured me that she felt uneasy with Tom being there. She had to lay

low and not get Tom suspicious of me. I understand that, it is just really sad that this

is how the situation is.

Daisy and I dancing at my

party.
July 5, 1922

This summer has had so many interesting twists and turns and today was no

exception. Nick tried to get a hold of me yesterday, so I had my new butler send

over a message. Then I called him up. He and I talked about why I fired all of my

servants. “I wanted somebody who wouldn’t gossip, Daisy comes over quite often -

in the afternoon,” (Fitzgerald 114). We continued talking about plans and how Daisy

wanted to know if he would join us for lunch soon. We made these plans a few days

ago when she came over. We wanted to make this as normal as possible. “What

about Tom? Won’t he be at lunch with us?” I asked. “Yeah, but Nick and Jordan

should be able to come. Just say you’re a friend of his and that I let Nick bring a

friend,” Daisy replied. Her and I nodded and smiled at the plan. “I don’t know if

I’m going to be able to control myself from kissing you,” I said quietly. To which she

leaned over and kissed me. “Kiss me now so you won’t have to later.” She said in a

low voice. I’ve always loved it when she changes her voice like that, it’s

mesmerizing.

My butler calling Nick

about my servants.
July 11, 1922

Oh no oh no oh no. Everything is spiraling out of control and I don’t know how to fix

this. Everything happened so fast I couldn’t fix what happened. It all started at the

Buchanan’s house for lunch. It was unbearably hot when I arrived. We sat there,

sweating pouring down our foreheads. When Tom left Daisy learned in and kissed

me. Then I heard Jordan yell, “What a low, vulgar girl,” (Fitzgerald 116). A small

smirk came across my face until Tom returned. We then talked about what we should

do, and after lots of arguing we decided to go to the city. I would take Daisy in

Tom’s car, and Tom would take Nick and Jordan in my car. When we got there Tom

began to interrogate me and my life in college. Daisy told him to knock it off but ti

was no use. He and I went at it, yelling at each other about who Daisy loved. I

wanted her to tell him she never loved him. During all the confusion I called out,

“Daisy’s leaving you,” and she said, “I am, though,” (Fitzgerald 133). The tension

ended when Nick told us it was his birthday. After this Daisy and I began to drive

home. She said she wanted to drive my car, which was okay with me. I end this

day’s writing with teaching Daisy how to drive my car.

Daisy and I trying to get

out of New York City.

July 12, 1922

As if my last entry was entirely chaotic, this one has to be even more out of control.

As soon as I finished yesterday’s entry, a woman came running out to the car. She

looked scared and asked for us to take her with us. We apologized and said we did

not know who she was and that she’s talking to the wrong people. She began to

stutter and said, “No you were here earlier with Tom Buchanan, this is his car.” Daisy

and I looked confused. “This is my car ma’am, and I was not here with Tom

Buchanan.” Daisy added on saying, “I’m his wife and I wasn’t here either.” She

took a step back and laughed. “Oh I know your husband real well.” Daisy began to

drive away, just as uncomfortable as I was. She mumbled something, and after a few

seconds she slammed on the breaks and turned around the car. I asked her what she

was doing but she didn’t say anything. I saw the girl still in the road, looking around

aimlessly. I tried to get Daisy to stop but she didn’t. We swapped places and I sped

back home asking her why she did that. Her response was, “That’s the mistress who

he’s been with.” I dropped her off at home, then I took my car home and returned to

waiting outside of her house, writing this entry in the bush. I am waiting to see what

will happen with her and Tom. Then I saw Nick come back with Tom and Jordan, and

he filled me in on what he knew. He tried to tell me about the accident but I said,

“Don’t tell me, old sport,” (Fitzgerald 144). I will wait here until Daisy and Tom go to

bed, just to make sure she is okay.

The accident scene being blocked off.

 My
Summer

Journal

{1922}