Professional Documents
Culture Documents
Lovetraction-Lines (Main Course)
Lovetraction-Lines (Main Course)
Disclaimer:
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Table Of Contents
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Introduction
Why is that men will chase after some woman like bloodhounds,
but treat the rest like yellow traffic lights?
Sometimes it seems like this woman has the power to work her
magic like a sexy lightning bolt in heels.
It happens every single day. When was the last time you
witnessed this world wonder? No matter what the weather or
venue, “that” woman is always around to make us question just
how in the world she pulls her magic off so effortlessly.
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response that gets catcalled or censored on daytime television.
This is the type of woman that makes men want to do things for
her, just for the sake of doing those things.
The truth is that these women are enjoying success with their
man because of the simple power of understanding, not their
luck. Almost no amount of romantic luck in the world can
compensate for not knowing the kind of game you’re playing.
To put it simply, you win more when you know more. Relax, this
is not a calculus lesson. Right now, we’re in the business of
making things simpler and not more difficult.
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Have you ever heard of the best way to eat an elephant? Well,
the absolute best way is to not eat any elephant at all, but the
second best way is to eat it one part at a time.
Here’s the good news: we’re really only dealing with one part.
We’re going to focus on the executive office of the male mind.
Conquer the part of his brain that calls the shots, and you’re in
charge - it’s so effective it should be illegal.
The rabbit hole goes much, much deeper than you think . You
need to think bigger than just a big butt. The attraction switch
means more than a coy little switch in your walk.
Any woman can get more eyeballs to turn down the road by
putting on less clothes, but if you want to have the kind of
quality that makes a man attracted to the idea of being with
you, it’s going to take something that’s just a touch more
refined than showing skin.
The only thing that needs to get taken off here is the hood on
top of a man’s emotions. When you see what’s under the hood,
you’ll catch onto the mechanics pretty quickly. It’s pretty smoky
and tough to see in there at first, but give it time and
everything will be clear as a crystal ball.
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These women can make men act like commitment-ready
gentlemen at the drop of a hat are basically like mechanics
working under the hood - the catch is that they can use the
tools with their minds.
These women are able to do what they do because they can flip
those attraction switches like a prop. Once again, an attraction
switch isn’t something you can physically wear or do, but it is
something that women can stimulate in a man’s head.
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attraction switch. The universal attraction switch is the type
that is older than civilization itself. This attraction switch is older
than the very first corny pickup line.
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· The power to make a man deeply addicted to pleasing you.
· The power to make a man fall deeply in love with you past
the point of no return.
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to learn about them, will often express beliefs that:
· They will always end up with a man who has no idea how to
treat a woman respectfully.
The reason that these women feel so little hope about their
prospects in love is truly the result of a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Because these women refuse to learn how to trigger attraction
switches when their relationships are in a relatively normal
state, their relationships completely melt under pressure like
butter.
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may find yourself in down the line, you need to develop some
skill at triggering attraction switches as a plan of defense. It
may seem a little rigid, but you’ll thank yourself for plugging
through it! Attraction switches are lifesavers when no other
ways of getting through to your man will cut it.
Despite how intense this all may seem, there’s no need to worry
about complexity or difficulty. Triggering that precious
psychological wonder-button just begging for attention in your
man’s mind only takes one thing: a connection with his
emotional mind.
The logical mind takes the front of the stage in plenty of casual
conversations we all have about our own thoughts and
memories, but the emotional mind is actually even more
perplexing.
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reach them, we need to start drilling into that emotional gold
mine.
When you accept the fact that just about all of our decisions
are a result of the unconscious mind, even if balanced out by
the conscious mind, you’ll see just how dramatic the power of
an attachment switch can be.
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dominoes just waiting to get flicked. The woman activates the
man’s attachment switch, an emotional surge supercharges his
unconscious mind, and in the blink of an eye, the man reunites
with his ancient instincts that force him to fight for his mate.
Now, while the effects are tasty, we still have to deal with the
bitter reality that many men fall out of love without exactly
giving a two-week warning. The power of his unconscious mind
can either be your best friend or your sworn enemy!
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Though a man just might logically address some key points
about a relationship that make him want to fly the coop, the
actual process of falling out of love is not something that he
plots on a spreadsheet. The unconscious mind always makes
the final call on whether or not a man will love or hate the idea
of sharing a life with you.
The more strongly her positive image has been reinforced, the
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less the woman actually has to do in order to reach her man’s
emotional mind. With higher access to the emotional mind, the
easier it is for a woman to trigger the attachment switches that
make a man increasingly devoted to her.
A man who is overcome with the mad will of the inner protector
will devote his life to you. You don’t need to climb any
mountains or reinvent the wheel – a man’s natural protector
instinct will literally do all of the work when it emerges, and all
that you have to do is delicately lay the foundation in your
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man’s subconscious for its arrival.
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satisfying the protector instinct, all kinds of bad stuff can occur.
A man who feels unfulfilled may start to become insecure about
his own worth as a competent partner to you, which can lead to
serious friction, fallout, and whining in the long run!
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Section 1 – Unwrapping the Male
Mind.
This book is a product of years of study and more years of
flopped dates. The frustration of every lady out there with a
luckless love life has served as the fuel for this vessel, and now
comes the time for liftoff!
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He could rotate through women with more ease and less moral
hang-ups than rotating a sunglasses kiosk. This was the type
of man whose name simply couldn’t be spoken in the same
breath as the word “commitment”.
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crush.
The client claimed that just the mere thought of this woman
was enough to make his entire day suddenly feel hopeful. He
had become addicted to her every little silly word, and the
butterflies in his stomach became aggressive at the slightest
touch of her.
This man was thrust into brand new, frightening territory .His
ego was built on getting any woman he wanted, and when that
was challenged, it came down like a flimsy house of cards!
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sex - he was hurting to complete himself with this woman.
Lance thought the sky must have been falling with the tears
that fell from his client’s eyes. It was all just too surreal, but it
was still very real. As it turned out, there were plenty of other
men who would come to Lance because of their struggle with
overwhelming commitment pangs.
All over the world, men are having their entire realities flipped
upside down when they encounter a woman who makes them
want to shut away their little black books to become family
men. The process of falling in love hits these guys like assassin
from a fold in the air.
These men had the rug pulled out from under their entire self-
image, and once that happens, a man can be prone to do just
about anything. When the assuredness in “self” has been
challenged by love, all of the things that he used to claim that
we’d never do can suddenly become his new habits – this is
especially true when it comes to money.
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Compared to the chance of having her agree to be his wife,
major financial debt seemed like nothing more than a mere
inconvenience to him in the process. In these cases, financial
consequences can easily be swapped out with physical and
social consequences as well.
You would think that these men learned how to describe their
dream women before learning the alphabet! One man actually
went as far as bringing in a picture of the woman who was
giving him lovesick dreams. Where a lot of men would normally
find “she’s really hot” to be an appropriate description, this man
found a library of novels for every single one of her features.
Even if a man doesn’t “get” the feelings he has, he’ll know that
the feelings are some of the rarest things he has. He won’t have
any idea how the feelings arose, but he’ll know that they aren’t
feelings that he’s likely to experience again for a very long time.
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issue of Superman. The supply of those feelings is limited to
one woman in the entire world, and that means that the
demand is at an absolute maximum.
Lance had a certain client who was in his mid-twenties, and this
young man found himself catching feelings for a woman who
was more than old enough to be his mother.
The sort of attraction that this man was feeling is the kind that
exists to be questioned and overwhelmed by. The mystique of
his attraction for her was enough to sustain his appetite to dive
deeper into it. He was at once given a high by the woman
herself, and mesmerized by the strength of his own feelings.
All that this man could tell was that there was just no turning
back from the avalanche of feelings. The age difference made it
difficult for him to find anything that they had in common, but
that didn’t discourage him in the slightest. He felt magnetized
to her by something and just couldn’t figure out where it began
or ended.
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what happens when emotions have won over.
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No matter whether the man is successful or a complete slob,
the cycle repeated itself yet again. Lance came to see that it
really didn’t matter how commitment-phobic the guy was once
bitten by the mysterious little love bug.
What was even more astounding to see was that these men
were seemingly managing to fall for women that they would
claim weren’t even their type in the first place. These men were
willfully breaking their own standards and replacing them with
the unshakable belief that they had found water on a desert
planet.
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in the body after the attraction has already happened, but
pinpointing Square 1 remains a serious challenge.
In a sense, it’s like the parts of our minds that identify a person
as physically attractive are actually being PILOTED by emotions!
What a man may have found boring or unattractive on women
before will suddenly become the mark of a supermodel on the
woman that he loves, and he probably won’t even realize it, let
alone understand it.
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of Unattractive things about their ex once the emotions have
worn off.
Let’s be honest, we may have all done that at some point. One
bad break and Prince Charming looks like Quasimodo.
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splurging on a woman with money that he literally needs in
order to eat, then you would probably see a sign that reads
“Out to Lunch”. The emotional brain, however, will be nothing
but fireworks and trumpets.
If not breaking their banks in half, these men were also prone
to unconsciously doing things to please their women that would
embarrass them tremendously in hindsight. It was almost as
though someone or something had literally hypnotized them in
the moment of being faced with that special woman.
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3 -“Pleasing these women made them ridiculously happy”.
One of the craziest things that Lance observed was the fact that
these men were pleased simply by pleasing their idealized
women. Without even receiving anything specific in return,
these men were seeking out ways to make their women happy
for the sake of doing it.
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Simply put, the Love Hormone is like a horn that calls out man’s
natural protector instinct from its cave. When the Love
Hormone is in play, the man’s desire to be a protective and
supportive mate can override his consciousness. The Love
Hormone is basically Cupid’s arrow!
If a man associates you with the feelings that come from Love
Hormone activation, the results are a BIG. You are going to be a
recurring image in his mind that he becomes addicted to.
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become addicted to, he’s going to feel an urgent need to
commit to you. His main priorities are going to become focused
on your pleasure and comfort above all other things. In the
dimension that man enters when he’s in love, time itself
become trifles compared to the ability he has to please you.
You could scour the globe from northeast to southwest, and you
still wouldn’t find a complete and undeniable answer to the
question of what establishes the very first seed of attraction
from the ground-up. Even if we can’t know the absolute truth,
what I can offer you is best answer that we’ve managed to form
after centuries of studies on love.
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the hottest thing being traded is emotion. We are perpetually
trading emotions with one another in this marketplace, just by
being around one another. We all derive some sense of
satisfaction out of feeling wanted and excited, and this connects
to our natural desire simply to feel good- emotions are traded
for this desire.
When a man has truly fallen in love with you, then you have to
understand that you have become like a water source for his
good feelings. Beyond having to actively do or say things that
make him feel happy, when he is in love, your existence alone
is what makes him experience those positive sensations that we
are all seeking in the emotional marketplace.
When you are able to feel like you can move a building simply
by being around a person, it’s only natural that you’d like to be
around them more often! When someone gives you the
euphoria of love, you both desire their happiness and company
– you desire to win their affection so that they’ll willingly be
around you for as long as possible.
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The trading of emotions is never-ending and over-arching – in
addition to being aware of that, you should also be sure to
understand the fact that an emotional trade is not always based
in logic. The emotional marketplace is not a logical marketplace,
and that makes it a very chaotic marketplace indeed.
There are lots of women in the world who, despite the illogical
nature of emotions and love, are convinced that there are
perfect logical reasons why they couldn’t ever possibly be loved.
Women out there are completely convinced that simply because
they don’t look a certain way or aren’t in a certain age group,
there’s no hope for them in romance.
Now if you think back to the men I was describing before, who
came to Lance for advice on their reality-defying obsession with
women of all shapes and sizes, can’t you see how ridiculous it is
to give up on being loved because of your looks? You might not
think that you have the right type of body for that one special
guy, but that shouldn’t make you short-sell yourself.
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Hurtsville! Women who doll themselves up for a better love life
without improving anything else are very, very good at learning
things the hard way.
When a man can get high off your presence, you’re going to be
10 out of 10 in his mind on just about any day of the year.
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When a word is spoken, be it “bloody murder” or “cuddle”,
feelings AND images have been transferred. Depending on the
word, either the graphic image or the feelings created by the
word can be more powerful than the other.
The words create the images, and then all of those images
reinforce the feelings – this is the fundamental nature of the
Lovetraction Lines that I’m going to be sharing with you.
When the words are spoken at the right possible time, striking
the iron while it is hot, his attraction reaches a fever pitch. A
truly attracted man will become addicted to the feelings that
come from the emotional impact of your words.
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up the Love Hormone, we can start doing this dance for real!
You know the system, and now it’s time to learn how to make
that system work for you – let’s start breaking into the specifics
of how to do that in the next chapter.
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Section 2 – Precious Honeybunch
Lines.
Now it’s finally time that we start discussing how we can put
these Lovetraction Lines in action. Don’t be worried that you’re
going to have to memorize any monologues to pull this off! You
can relax, this won’t be like a high school drama class; even so,
you’ll still be on your way to getting an “A+” in the school of
attraction.
The golden rule here is that these lines are SIMPLE and SWEET.
I actually sometimes interchange the term “Precious
Honeybunch Lines” with Lovetraction Lines. This type of
language is friendly enough to be low-risk and even flattering to
the man you’re speaking to, but the point is that it still creates
positive discomfort.
Once you get a good grip on the sort of impression that this
type of language gives off, you’ll find that all of the
psychological complexity we’ve been talking about is almost
shockingly easy to apply and benefit from. If you’re the type
who learns best from doing, then this will all be a breeze.
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little bit lighter wherever she goes.
One day she would blame her “love handles”, and they next day
she’d say it was her forehead. No matter what the case, Cassie
was convinced that she was the pinnacle of “UN-DATABLE”
given a human form to walk the earth.
Wonderfully Weird
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There are plenty of people out there who argue that being
normal is actually even weirder than being “weird”. Being the
weird one means you have a memorable personality. The times
when “weird” becomes a problem is when it affects your self-
confidence to the point of self-loathing.
You should find ways to let your personal weirdness billow like a
flag, not drag you down like an anvil. It was one unremarkable
day in the distant past when I got the epiphany to address this
problem. While I was struggling with the problem of figuring out
what I could do to make men recognize all of my best traits, I
had a shocking realization: I was doing it backwards!
Do you know all of that time you can waste waiting by the
phone in distress after a date that left you feeling unsure?
Some women could have written books in all of the time
dedicated to that. When that happens, what is it that you’re
feeling? You’re feeling regret, for one, but you’re also thinking
about him. Your thoughts are virtually invaded by him.
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“Positive Discomfort”. It means giving a guy a cocktail of
pleasure, mixed with some discomfort. This makes him feel a
sudden urge to chase you & capture you.
Let me just try and illustrate the beauty of this reversal with a
personal story of my own.
I was on a date with this guy that had, up until that point, been
more or less standard fare. We were in the middle of our date,
still scoping each other out.
When a guy casually asks you what you think of him, he’s
offered you an opportunity to flip him on his head so strongly
that it could make a judo master blush. The thing you have to
appreciate is the fact that he expects you to give him a straight
answer; you can have a lot of fun with this expectation.
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a little bit weird about you.”
This isn’t the type of power that breaks through walls, but
rather the kind that seeps into a crack in the wall and expands
until the whole thing comes crumbling down under its own
weight.
After that quick exchange with the man, his entire persona
seemed different. He stuttered a bit more, he laughed
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nervously at things that weren’t all that embarrassing. He
became a lot more complimentary, almost in a deferential sort
of way.
You really just can’t overstate how far just a tiny bit of curiosity
can go when it comes to creating a powerful sense of interest.
By not letting him onto everything that I was thinking, but
giving him a compliment under the fog of doubt, I had drawn
the beginning of a “circle of attraction”.
The thing that we’re dealing with here is what’s called the
“reptilian brain”.
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absolutely nothing to do with calculated reasoning skills. The
reptilian brain’s primary objectives are to maximize pleasure
and minimize pain, plain and simple. When it comes to the
decisions that you make, only the ratio of enjoyment to
inconvenience matters to the reptilian brain - if the latter
outweighs the former, the reptilian brain opposes it.
Because the reptilian brain doesn’t have any capacity for logical
reasoning, it relays its messages with extreme volume and
urgency. To the reptilian brain, any chance to be satisfied is a
chance that shouldn’t be missed for the world! Therefore, when
the reptilian brain has decided that something must be
acquired, it won’t be easily be swayed by the words “No”.
When I told that man that I was unsure about a certain quality
of his, it basically spoke right to his reptilian brain. When his
reptilian brain received the message that my answer wasn’t
immediately available, all that happened as that its desire for
my answer was intensified to an even higher degree than
before.
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desire for something that it has been a challenged to have, he
will begin to shift into certain “states” illustrating the condition
very clearly. When I first gave my date my answer, his initial
confusion put him into INTRIGUE mode.
Now of course, you can’t just give up all of the answers just
when he’s become intrigued. If you immediately satisfy his need
for answers as soon as he shows intrigue, then you risk
breaking the intrigue mode and winding up back at square one.
If you hold fast and don’t let him have his curiosity satisfied
right away, however, he’s going to advance from Intrigue Mode
to an even more intense state. The state that follows Intrigue
Mode is what we call Obsession Mode.
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Now of course, there are plenty more Lovetraction Lines than
the one I used in my story above. In truth, the type of things
that you could say are really only limited by your personal level
of creativity.
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actually him that’s freaking you out or something entirely
different. As soon as he gets the idea that something about him
just might be weirding you out, his mind is going to start
spinning into a little damage control mode.
He may not even flat-out say that it’s bugging him, but he’s
going to be running a thorough and rushed mental inspection of
everything about him that might possibly be giving off a freaky
vibe. In this simple phrase, what you’ve managed to do is lay
the foundation for Intrigue Mode to arise in the very first
moments of the date. This is what it means to hit the ground
running!
Now, towards the middle of the date (assuming that two of you
can still stand each other, you’re in prime territory to start
laying down some more sweet and tasty little lines to make his
intrigue gain a little bit of additional heat.
With this phrase, you’re offering that reptilian brain its optimal
ratio of pleasure to discomfort. He’ll be invigorated by the fact
that it seems you legitimately like him, but at the same time,
there will be a festering little pit of resistance to the fact that
you’re still keeping something unknown.
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The impact of the positive things that you said will be
complimented by that which you’ve chosen to omit. He’s not
going to completely understand if the gravity of that
unmentionable thing is really so intense that it could outweigh
the positives, and that’s exactly what we want! We want to
keep him fed enough to develop an appetite, but always a little
bit hungry.
Now the range of contexts in which you could use this line
below is pretty versatile, but no matter how you choose to use
it, it will serve you well. In this phrase, you’re going to make
him refocus his perspective from him to you
Whatever gets said towards the end of the date will tend to be
what echoes the loudest in your minds after you part ways. In
this situation, what you’re basically doing is making sure that
he leaves with the question of your true self buzzing about in
his mind.
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a splash of cold water on his face. He might have been
wondering if the type of girl you are is really attracted to the
guy you think he is, and this will intensify his intrigue yet again.
"Well, honestly I've been told I'm one of the most nicest
people you'd ever encounter. My friends actually think
I'm even a little bit crazy. But I do this secret little thing
in my head where within the first 5 minutes I can figure
out whether things will work out or not and that’s why I
asked you this question.”
(Or Alternatively)
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evaluation”. While it may not be all that serious, it’s reasonable
to bet that it may make him anxious to understand how he did.
"Well, I mean, have you ever sat down and thought "gee
if there was a perfect woman for me, these are the
qualities she'd have?"
Since he’s been thinking about you for the entire date, he might
be likely to start wondering about how you could stack up to
the idealize version of the perfect female partner that he has in
his mind.
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Then you say, "Well I have this sort of unusual checklist
that I've started using, and you actually already have 6
really good points checked off...but..."
Giving him six points and leaving it at that will basically leave
him helpless to understand whether or not his six points are out
of 10, 7, or 700. This is a great last-ditch way to make him
really start checking his closet for anything he may have
accidentally left out in the open.
Now one last thing that you can throw in there for a good (and
necessary) effect is an additional dash of uncertainty about the
truth of your feelings. The phrase below illustrates the uncertain
message well:
The perfect way to cap this off is to let him know that the odd
things will be fun to tell him, but you’ll be keeping them a
secret until then!
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Section 3 - Fire in the Belly Lines
My friend Kylie and I can talk about pretty much anything in the
world - our favorite topic of choice is generally the weird stuff
that men do. We’ve been bouncing success stories and horror
stories off of one another for years and we’ve both grown
equally more mature and snarky together over the years.
Between the two of us, we’ve had every kind of date with men
that can be found under the sun, plus a couple more. Even
though both of us are prepared for anything at this point, one
day she said something that caught me off-guard. What Kylie
told me made my heart sink, but it’s something that I’ve
become pretty familiar with.
“Even though I have a boyfriend but I still feel lonely even when
he is around. He might have committed to a relationship, but he
still hasn’t committed to meeting my needs. I need him to
smother me, to hold me, to kiss me and more importantly make
me feel LOVED. But expecting him to LOVE me the way I wish is
like asking a snail to RUN. I know it’s never going to happen.”
Have you ever felt like spending time with your guy is sort of
like spending time with good-looking thin air? If so, you can
probably relate to the frustration Kylie was experiencing with
her man. Kylie is a strong piece of lady, but nobody’s patience is
infinite - at some point, if you feel like a man always has you in
the backseat, your blood pressure will start rising.
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Kylie wanted to feel loved by her loved one. I want to feel
loved, and I’m assuming that YOU want to feel loved as well -
are we all megalomania-cal harpies for wanting this? Absolutely
not! We need to be real and fast-acting about the fact that
sometimes it’s going to take more than just the “want” to
transition into the “have”. We need to play the game smarter.
In this stage, you and your partner are less like individuals and
more like a two-headed chimera that can’t stop kissing itself for
two seconds. This is the stuff that bad smut novels are made of.
It is truly a wondrous, mind-boggling and sweet bubble to live
in.
If you’re in this stage, then I salute you and envy you. If you’re
not in this stage, you probably know what’s coming next. For
the uninitiated who think that the Honeymoon stage defines a
relationship, this may not be a fun lesson, but a valuable one.
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Once again, the honeymoon stage is a glorious little bubble. I
really do hate bursting bubbles, but bubbles are made to burst!
Okay, now this might sound a little off-putting when you first
hear it, but you need to trust me on this one. One of the main
ways that you can successfully beat the natural descent from
the clouds of the honeymoon phase is to stroke his ego.
If you can resist rolling your eyes at the thought of making the
already-swollen ego of a man even more inflated, then you’ve
probably got more patience than most women! If you do find it
a little crazy though, then that’s alright - I used to feel the
same way until I knew a little better about how to do it the
right way.
Stroking your man’s ego doesn’t mean you’re going to give him
a swollen head, but rather that you’re going to preserve the
energy and high that the early stage of a relationship is full of.
You see, there’s the RIGHT way to stroke a man’s ego, and then
there’s the typical definition of stroking an ego. The typical
definition of stroking a man’s ego is to prostrate oneself and
elevate a guy to the point that he thinks he’s a god; rest
assured, this isn’t the way that we’re looking to operate here!
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Instead of trying to put it into your guy’s head that he’s a
superhuman gift from the heavens, you’re going to make a
more natural approach. At this point, you probably understand
that men are like addicts when it comes to validation. Even if he
isn’t an insecure man-child, every man has a need to have his
ego validated to some degree.
The fire in the belly means that he has a burning urge to seek
out that which will satisfy him, which can only be earned by
proving himself as a powerful and worthy provider for you. The
best way to stroke a man’s ego in a way that gives him that
gives him a motivating fire in the belly is to make an effort to
stroke his ego indirectly.
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Indirect ego stroking is what separates you from women who
only put their men on pedestals without being treated well. If
you stroke your man’s ego in a way that’s slightly indirect, he’ll
get the hint that there is something he should aspire to, without
feeling that he can’t do any better than he already is.
Below are just some examples of the lines that you can use in
order to indirectly stroke his ego and set off that fire in the belly
that burns for further validation.
Now with this line, you’re not mentioning anything specific that
he’s done, but you’re letting him know that his presence
generates a sense of security within you. If he feels that he
gives you a sense of security, his protector instinct will be
validated immediately.
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that I have in my life, and for the truly blessed
relationship I have with you. But I just wanted to Thank
You for being such an upstanding man in my life. I can’t
even tell you how deeply I appreciate you.”
Now once again, this type of line isn’t one that you need to
directly address something that he’s done recently. Letting him
know that you feel grateful for being in a relationship with him
will give him some incentive to try living up to what you’ve
described.
Every time that you thank you man for making you feel loved,
what you’re communicating is an expectation that you want to
be loved. You’re not directly demanding that they love you, but
at the same time, it’s a direct communication of the importance
that being loved has in your heart. His ego will compel him to
continue satisfying your desire for being loved.
Gently come near him, and lightly caress your hand down
his forearm- or lean your head toward his chest
(physically bring yourself near in a soothing way), and
announce:
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again, and repeat“ Thank you”.
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The importance of the word “conquer” in his phrase can’t be
understated. “Conquer” can’t be separated from images of
victory, which will instantly validate his ego and validate his
primal protector.
The line above shows that a great way to indirectly stroke his
ego is to talk about your feelings of power. If he feels that he’s
generating a sense of power within you, he’ll be getting the
message that he possesses a sort of power himself. His ego is
stroked in a way directly connected to you, which links his
sense of efficacy to your happiness.
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phenomenal man.”
Letting your man know that you feel lucky for being able to be
in a relationship with him will make him feel uniquely powerful.
If he thinks he’s worthy in a unique way, it will make him feel
that he has a special duty to provide for you.
Once again, this type of line gives your man the sense that he’s
being positively compared to other man that he won’t want to
lose to in the future. His fire will be ignited in a way that makes
him strive to continue being the best protector.
When your man here’s a line like this, it’s going to spur a fire in
his belly that will make him want to start working harder to
think about what it is you want from him.
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“It always surprises me how well you know me, and how
you can always figure out what’s going on with me, even
if I don’t tell you. I just wanted to let you know how
much I appreciate it when you keep my needs in mind,
and how much I truly love the way that you care for me.”
This is another type of line that’s going to make your man start
deeply considering how much more he can work in order to
always stay on top of your needs. Mentioning that he always
keeps your needs in mind will, indirectly, encourage him to keep
your needs in mind more often.
“I might not say this enough, but you truly are special to
me. The way that you care about me, and the way that
you understand what I need….even if I don’t know what
I need myself…. Is just so amazing. You’re a truly
irreplaceable man, and I am so thankful to have you in
my life.”
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The use of “each day” in this phrase is going to light the kind of
fire in his belly that burns for consistently improving as a
provider. Every single day will be a new opportunity that he
sees to live up to this statement.
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Section 4 - Attraction Meow Lines
Like most of the stories we love and hate to tell, this one begins
with a guy. The guy’s name was Joseph, and when I was around
Joseph, I could just barely remember my own name. To put it
eloquently, I wanted Joseph. I wanted Joseph and I wanted him
badly.
A lot of women have this issue with not knowing what to say
when they’re around a guy they like, and so they end up not
saying anything at all - I actually had the the opposite problem.
When Joseph was around, half-formed words would just flow
out of my mouth like silver. In hindsight, it was less like words
and more like a guttural mating call.
Somehow, against the odds that I’m sure must have made
lottery tickets look like a steals, I found myself in a relationship
with Joseph. I don’t even completely remember how it
happened in the first place, but all I knew was that I couldn’t
find the words to describe it.
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I kept on being at a loss for words to describe it, but for a
different reason than how it began. I couldn’t find a way to
describe the relationship because, in all honestly, it didn’t seem
like a lot was happening for me to describe in the first place.
I just couldn’t get over the fact that I started something with
Joseph in first place, bu beyond that, it was becoming hard to
get into the fact that I had started something with Joseph.
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wanted to make some plans with my boyfriend, like a normal
and sane woman. Two things changed after I made the call: the
first was that my “boyfriend” told me that he actually had a
date and asked if I wanted to reschedule, and the second was
that I didn’t feel normal or sane.
The only saving grace was that I wasn’t mistaken in the fact
that Joseph actually existed. He wasn’t completely my
imaginary boyfriend, but that still didn’t necessarily flatter me. I
had one foot in the hole I was ready to crawl into forever and
only send cats out to get food.
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you’ve already had a “Joseph” situation of your own, or maybe
you’ve just realized that you’re currently in a Joseph situation.
If you’ve never put yourself in a Joseph fiasco, then I both envy
and applaud you - let’s keep that forward momentum going,
shall we?
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When the guy has to work for actually getting the attention you
offer, he’s going to feel that pressure on top of him to earn it.
When you first get that sense that the guy is starting to come
to you, then you’ve shifted that control of the gravity back in
your favor.
Once that power is back in your favor, it’s time to deliver that
delicious coup de grace - it’s what I like to call the EMOTIONAL
SHAKEUP.
When the man has started to work harder and harder to make
you pay more attention, that positive discomfort is going to
make him invest his ego and feel emotional strain. When he
gets that strain, you need to alter the amount of attention you
pay - this is really going to shake him up on the inside if he’s
invested enough.
You just have to keep letting your availability wax and wane,
letting his emotions get shaken up so that he never stops
feeling that drive to figure you out. You can think of the
emotional shakeup technique as an exercise in push and pull.
You push the man away when he thinks he’s got you, and as an
effect, this actually pulls him in.
Now let’s rewind the clock just a little bit here. If I had actually
been the woman back then that I am today, I would have
handled things with Joseph a little bit differently - for one, I
probably would have gotten the hint that it wasn’t worth my
time in the very first place. For the sake of this lesson, however,
here’s how I could have used push and pull.
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Replace the name “Joseph” with the name of any man that you
may have, currently are, or might be dealing with in the future,
and you can use the power of push and pull to your own
advantage as well!
“Joseph, don’t take this the wrong way! I really like you,
I mean you’re truly a fun guy, but can we slow down a
little? I mean, I totally unsure where this is going.”
Now this is just the kind line that shows how pushing and
pulling can be achieved at the same time, in a single phrase! As
soon as you say “don’t take this the wrong way”, it’s going to
set off a little bit of alarm in his mind that puts him on his
guard.
You build up on the fact that you like him by calling him fun, but
then you splash some cold water on that excitement by
suggesting that things go slower. You’ve pulled him in with
those initial compliments, but at the same time, you still pushed
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him back.
When you ask if the two of you can break things off, it carries a
tone that you two might actually be ready to seal things off for
good - it’s hard to match this level of push without making him
feel that there’s no chance at all.
Now instead of making him feel that his chances with you have
been shot down over the mountains completely, this phrases
matches the push with an equally strong pull. The situation
here is that you’re saying that things are getting intense. The
word “intense” illustrates a much more passionate and heated
picture than “fast”.
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When you say the word “intense”, you’re telling him that there’s
some serious force in the chemistry between you two. “Intense”
carries some a real sign of intimate gravity, but immediately
following that, you’re pushing him away with the suggestion of
a break.
Men don’t just turn women down only because they think that
there’s no possibility at all that they’d ever want to get involved
with those women. When a man doesn’t express interest, part
of it comes from the belief he has that he could be in a
relationship with that woman at any time he wanted if he
decided to.
By using push and pull, you’re basically pulling the rug out from
under that natural power play . By challenging his idea that
you’d be available at the drop of a hat, you’re shaking up the
security zone of his ego. The following lines show some
different spins that you can put on pushing and pulling with the
suggestion of a”break”.
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Now instead of implying that things are getting too intense, you
mention that your uncertainty comes from “weirdness”.
Intensity sends the message of passion and heat, but
“weirdness” will create uncertainty. The vagueness of saying
that things feel weird will set off his imagination.
This is another way that you can achieve the push and pull
effect by keeping things as a vague as possible. By saying that
things are getting interesting, you’re practically saying that
things are going WELL between the two of you. With the
inclusion of a single word, “too”, you turn the potential positive
compliment into a doubt.
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Now one thing about this statement is that you’re not actually
saying that you want to take a break. Unlike the other
emotional shake-up statements, this one doesn’t directly strike
him with the declaration of wanting to cut things off right away.
This push and pull statement works by implying the break,
creating a sense of urgency.
You don’t say that you feel bad about the time that you’re
spending with him, but just that it gives you a “weird feeling”.
He may interpret that weird feeling as a sign of interest, but
there’s also a chance that he’ll start questioning whether or not
he gave you a weird vibe - either way, it’s going to make him
self-conscious!
Now you may get the impression that this statement is more on
the push side than the pull side, but looking a bit deeper shows
the both aspects at play. Even after saying that the two of you
aren’t really getting along, you’re following that up by saying
that you don’t think you’re getting along compared to how
things used to be.
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Due to the fact that you’re saying things aren’t going the way
that the used to be, you’re implying that there’s something
running out. While being complimented by the fact that you’ve
considered him an idea partner at onepoint, he’s going to feel
some pressure when he thinks he’s losing that power to attract
you.
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Section 5 - Rejection Squish Squash
Lines
Once upon a time, I had a client who made the decision to take
a very courageous journey. This client of mine had decided to
journey forth into the harrowing dimension of online dating.
Maybe in this day and age we’ve just learned to see “high-risk”
as “normal odds”? After all, it’s not like every person out of the
growing number of people using these services is a cannibal.
Usually, the best case scenario that people hope for is that their
date is at least within 10 years and 200 pounds of the way they
describe themselves online; it’s the world we live in!
Before meeting him, she was actually feeling more or less good
about the chances for things going well. He had been like a
“compliment machine” when they were flirting online. He
flattered her like she was the most attractive things with two
legs and eyes. She was worried that he might be one of those
guys who just becomes too clingy, too quickly.
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As fate would have it, things turned out to actually be the the
opposite of what she had expected to happen, and in the worst
possible way. Upon meeting this man in the flesh for the very
first time, it wasn’t exactly love at first sight. Instead of
welcoming her with a shower of sweet compliments, this man
was about as welcoming as an angry junkyard dog.
She had entertained the idea that any man’s attitude might
gradually get nasty, but this man had exploded straight out the
gate like a fireball of malice.
By the time that the date was over, her confidence had been
grated so badly you could sprinkle it over pasta. When she
came to me, she was a woman who seemed to have the same
opinion of her body as the opinion most people have about an
empty soda can. This woman could not, for the life of her, even
fathom that any man could ever find her more than “average”.
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The way that I taught this woman to start loving herself again is
the same thing that I’m going to be laying out in this chapter
for you. The strongest tool that I can use to teach you this, as I
used to teach her, is the tool of HISTORY.
In times when the human race was a lot younger and a lot
more physically aggressive than it is today in the age of ebooks,
there was a different kind of hierarchy. People were led by alpha
males and alpha females. An alpha human was the type of
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human who, back before things like refrigerators and medicine,
was able to eat and produce offspring by being the strongest.
All that mattered back then was that a human being possessed
the force of will and steel nerves to assert himself or herself
over all competition. Those who could shrug off injuries and
deal them back twofold would be the ones to survive - there
was nothing like “looks “ holding people back, because having
good looks wasn’t essential to preserving our existence.
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either. The number one thing that you’re going to be paying
attention to here is your personality. I’m not ordering your to
uproot your personality here, but just to really take some time
to think about how much influence it has.
When you reunite with that awesome and primal alpha female
within you, there are three things that you’re going to be able
to do:
Step 1 – Pretend that you are a super star that men are
absolutely hungry for.
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win you over.
The first quality above refers to the fact that all men, on a deep
level, desire an alpha female. When the primal protector has
awoken, it will be hungry for the type of mate with a certain
confidence that matches the intensity of its desire.
The third quality refers to the fact that this level of confidence
you hold is going to shift the balance of power back into your
favor. When you have become a hyper-confident alpha female,
you will gain the power to be able to detect an alpha male when
you’re in the company of one - this will give YOU the leverage
to size men up instead of recoiling from judgment.
When you can start feeling just a tiny fraction of that freakish
confidence inside of you, you’ll be in the right type of mindset
to start trying out some of the “Rejection Squish-Squash” lines
I’ve set as examples below...
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“You know, you better stay away from me before things
get too intense. I’ve been told that I’m like a cigarette, I
might be pleasurable in the short term but could cause a
lot of damage over time”.
This line ties directly back to the fact that the man’s primal
brain is completely obsessed with the opportunity to take on
risks and come out the WINNER. When a man starts to think of
you as the kind of person who might be “too hot to handle”, you
will become that fatally attractive challenge in his mind that
both excites him and warns him.
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We’ve talked so much about the man’s primal protector at this
point that you’ve probably already caught onto why this line has
as much influence as it does. The primal protector wants
nothing more than to be validated for its capability at making
challenges, and with this Rejection Squish-Squash line, you’re
doing two things to it:
Now, here are some of the more preemptive lines that you can
use to flip a guy’s apathy back over his head when you’re on
the first date. This is the type of line that you can use
specifically when the conversation had slowed down and you
feel like things might be heading toward an awkward silence.
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By saying this, you’re not actually calling him boring - still, what
you’re doing is putting the pressure him to show that he’s
exciting to be someone that a woman wants to spend her time
with. He wants to feel cool!
The man has probably invested his ego into thinking that a
woman he rejects will always be one that won’t be able to
handle it, but when you say that you’ve been thinking of the
same thing, it will affect him. He’s going to start trying to figure
out when he stopped seeming perfect, and it will drive him
nuts.
Another thing that you can say when indicates that he can’t see
himself being in a relationship with you…
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This carries the power to surprise him just like the previous
Rejection Squish-Squash, in addition to making him anxious at
the fact that he may have unknowingly come on too strong.
“Yeah she’s just about right for you. You two will make
the cutest couple ever.”
A man who is playing hard to get rarely thinks that the woman
knows he’s playing hard to get on purpose. Stating that he’s
playing hard to get, outright, will be like smoking him out of his
not-so-secret hiding place.
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your point. Just be direct and ask me out already.”
“Okay, let me get one thing clear. You might be sexy and
all but if you on keep playing hard to get, how will you
ever make me fall for you? What if some other guy steals
me away in the mean time?”
A lot of men are convinced that if a woman finds them sexy, it’s
game over and they can’t lose. If you let the man know that his
good looks will be useless if he doesn’t make a move, it will
shake him up out of his comfort zone and pressure him into
actually making a move.
This is just a more subtle way of teasing him out of the comfort
zone. You’re giving the shock of directly acknowledging the fact
that he’s playing hard to get, complimenting him, and
challenging him by implying that there’s something about him
hiding away. This could easily rile him up and make him want to
exhibit his assertive, “manly” side.
A line like this will rock a man out of playing hard to get by
letting him know that you’re not waiting forever. Being
reminded that there’s a finite amount of time that a woman will
be interested in him can make even the most confident man
start sweating. Not wanting to lose face, he’ll feel a sense of
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urgency to “beat the clock” and win you over!
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Section 6 - Sensation Grand Slam
Lines
Even a man who treats a woman like it’s his mission to please
her may suddenly go AWOL. No matter how much you think
your man would do for you, you owe it your relationship to keep
that positive discomfort fresh!
If you start to feel like your man couldn’t possibly be any more
attached to you, don’t let your guard down - this is should only
be a sign for you to maintain the atmosphere that makes him
attached! When it seems like everything is going perfectly, the
last thing you want to do is start doing the things that drag a
relationship down.
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success. When your man feels that accessing you is too easy, it
will be very hard for him not to lose excitement for you.
The people and things that create the most nervous energy in
our lives are the things that we can’t control. If we can’t directly
affect it, we can’t help but wonder about it. The more a man
lets his imagination run wild, the more anxious and vulnerable
he’s going to feel. Keep the control in your court, and the
relationship will be like a masterpiece of your design.
Being able to control the frame will give you more influence
over the tone and depth of every part of the relationship. It’s
easy to get overwhelmed by just how much potential power you
can hold in this position, but it definitely beats the alternative!
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pumped up and anxious to win the game to attract you,
because they tease his primal urge to be validated.
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days it was like we had a psychic connection, and other days it
was like he completely forgot my name.
I just didn’t understand how this man could become dryer than
snake skin so quickly, especially after he seemingly wanted to
know everything about my breakfast the day before. I didn’t
have the slightest idea of how completely I was being played,
because I was too caught up in the min-to-max-and-back flow
of his affection.
Even when he left me feeling high and dry, I just couldn’t help
but love the fact that he was next to me at all. It was driving
me crazy in the best way, but at the end of the day, it was still
driving me crazy. I couldn’t keep my eyes off of him to save my
life. Every time I thought that I had him “pinned down”, it
would seem like he was miles away all over again.
When you become the woman in his life that sways like a
moving target, there will be very few things that your man
works as hard to get!
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Even with all the intricate mental effects created by a moving
target, your job can be accomplished with only two simple
steps. The simple steps are as follows:
That’s seriously all there is to making the hot and cold effect
work! You give him all of the affection that you can in the
beginning, and then after that, you taper off and limit your
attention. With just these two easy steps, you have what it
takes to send your man careering into an state of obsession
with you.
When you give that man just a little sample of attention at first
before pulling it back, two great things are going to happen as a
result of what you’ve done.
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item.
When you learn how to make confusion work for you, then
you’ll have both the method and the madness in the equation.
Neither we or the men we date will ever really know everything
when it comes to a relationship, but with this, you can use the
power of what isn’t known without actually even having to lie.
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To really make the most use of hot and cold psychology, you
need to make sure that you appreciate both the hot and cold
sides of the coin. This kind of lesson shouldn’t be taken as a
reason to just stop giving your man any affection at all, but it
should be understood that the affection needs to be shown in
doses.
No matter how thirsty you might be for the man, this mixture of
interest and disinterest is going to make him just as thirsty if
not thirstier than you. Lots of men like to think about the
important issues in black and white, and with this mixture, you
seriously threaten that black and white logic! To him, it will feel
like his entire idea of a rationale is getting thrown out of whack!
Everything I’m teaching you boils down to the fine mix between
showing interest and disinterest! There’s a certain type of
phrase that achieves this hot and cold mixture better than any
other - I like to call these my Sensation Grand Slam Lines.
These are called Sensation Grand Slam Lines due to the fact
that when you use them, they slam your man with a dual
sensation of love and rejection.
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Since it’s extremely unlikely that he’s going to have a straight
answer for a million dollar question like this, the confusion is
probably going to sink in IMMEDIATELY. When he realizes that
he doesn’t have any answer for you, it’s going to make him a
bit anxious. In his anxiety, he’ll also be wracking his brain what
the actual truth may be.
He’ll definitely get a faint positive vibe from the implication that
you seriously want to jump his bones, but of course, that’s with
the sour aftertaste. It’s like a reversed version of that type of
candy that starts off with a sour flavor but ends with a sweet
and mellow tang.
It doesn’t get any simpler than this line! The “Grand Slam” in
“Sensation Grand Slam” really gets shown in in this example.
What carries more weight in a relationship than the words
“love” and “hate”? These are two loaded words with massive
stopping power, and putting them together creates serious
results.
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Saying that he gives you reasons to like him is a compliment,
but the rose has thorns! He’s going to wonder what that
recurring thing is that holds you back from completely liking
him. The fact that you’re still spending time with him will be a
sign that you’re attracted, but at the same time, that shadow of
doubt is going to be really hard to ignore.
This line is going to make him start thinking hard about all of
those little things that he might have done to try and win you
over. He may or may not even be able to actually identify what
it is that worked, and which things aren’t actually working. All
it’s going to take is one moment of confusion to set his brain
into that game of internal ping-pong.
The key is that you let him know there are plenty of reasons for
you to want him, and that’s going to get him excited. He’ll want
to know what the deal is with those ambiguous other things are
for sure, and that’s where the power of confusion starts to work
for you.
“I love spending time with you, but I’m never sure about
whether or not it’s a good idea...”
Even f you love spending time with your guy, you still have to
admit that it always comes with just a little bit of risk. A line
like this is actually pretty honest in a way, but here, you’re
going to play it up just a little bit. When you say that you’re
uncertain about whether or not it’s the best idea, he’s going to
get very curious and very quickly!
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“You’re fun, but honestly, you make me nervous.”
Fun is fun, and fun is a good thing, right? When you tell your
man that spending time with him is a load of fun, he’s going to
be glad to hear it! After telling him that you think he’s fun, you
hit him with the curve ball.
When he thinks that the kind of fun that you two have makes
you nervous, he might feel some of that nervous energy
himself. He might actually interpret it as a sign of attraction,
but it will also make him think about the possibility that you
have doubts. He’s definitely going to know what he could do to
try and address those doubts!
With this line, you come straight out of the gate with a
statement that marks him as a risky prospect! The word “ex”
summons up all kinds of feelings, and some of those feelings
will definitely get him thinking about the more “exciting” things.
All of these lines work by making him feel like he’s on a razor
thin line. The line is going to have your serious attraction on
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one side, and your serious uncertainty about him on the other
side. Making him feel like he’s just delicately walking that line
between having your devotion or getting left is exactly what
you want!
Not only does this line have that effect of hitting with him with
your interest and disinterest at the same time, but it also does
something else. When you say that a certain “part of you” likes
him, it’s going to make him start thinking hard about exactly
what that part of you is!
This is the kind of hot and cold line that’s going to make him a
lot more interested in you as a person. He’s going to think
about where the common lines between he and you actually are
in the first place!
Few things really get a guy excited about a woman more than
the thought of being able to “drive her crazy”. Driving someone
crazy in a good way means that they think you’re the best kind
of fun! At the same time, you don’t just let it hang tight with
the fact that he drives you crazy. By saying that you wonder
about whether or not it’s worth it, you give him room to worry.
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A lot of guys out there constantly think about whether or not a
girl they’re seeing is interested in something “more”, but
confirming it too quickly on your end can be a recipe for
disaster. Instead of being too hasty, you can seriously increase
his interest without putting all of your cards on the table right
away.
Saying that you’ve thought about being more friends with him
lets him know that you’re definitely attracted to him. Even
though you say that you’re more attracted, the fact that you
just say you’ve “thought” about it doesn’t completely confirm
anything. Saying that he makes you nervous will make him
wonder about what it could be that’s holding back your feelings!
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Section 7 - Queen of my Heart Lines
The goal isn’t to make your man drag a piano across the city
with a busted up rope just because you can! There is no deceit
or negative energy involved in this process. The primal
protector wants to be woken up, but we just have get a little bit
more creative about how to do that in this modern age.
When you get down to it, you can inspire any man to do more
things for you with the techniques that we’re discussing here.
There is a simple and clean process to making it so that he
always finds you to be his top priority. In general, the process
always goes a little something like this:
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4. Use some easy reward and punishment theory.
From the first moment that you get the idea to make a request
to your man, that request itself has to be the center of your
attention. Whatever you do, make sure that you don’t try to
“break into” the request by arguing about the way that
sprinklers turn! For the sake of actually getting something done,
we have to focus only on what actually needs to get done.
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-To talk about something that’s troubling us greatly
-To just be a little bit more open and honest about things in
general
-To finally fix that one thing in the house that isn’t working
correctly
-To show just a little bit more affection now and then
Whatever that little thing may be, making sure that you suggest
it in a simple and clear way will increase the chance of success
and decrease the chance that you end up talking to the back of
his head.
After you’ve identified what it is that you want, you can move
things forward by suggesting what he could do in order to make
what you want actually happen. The most important keyword
here is to suggest what that thing is.
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You don’t want to just up and command your man to do
something, because these aren’t instructions on how to get
cheated on as quickly as possible.
When you know how to suggest the things that you want your
man to do in an effective way, stuff starts moving! Trash
magically gets taken out! All that you have to do is learn how to
properly tread that very, very thick line between intelligently
suggesting and blatantly demanding.
To make this all a lot clearer, here’s an example of how you can
easily go about suggesting that your man do something, the
RIGHT way:
You see, this is easily the worst way that you could go about
trying to get your man to do exactly what it is that you want
him to do. Instead of encouraging him to please you, all that a
line like this is really going to do is piss him off.
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It’s painfully obvious what the request is, but the fact that it
hasn’t been worded as a command still doesn’t make it an
effective suggestion. It’s passive-aggressive. The right way to
suggest something is by doing it in a way that still isn’t directly
commanding him, but doesn’t patronizing him like a child either.
Remember all the things that we’ve said about the primal
protector? By making it clear that you need his help, you
directly appeal to the primal protector within him and its desire
to be validating through providing for you. Instead of feeling
like he’s getting bossed around without any consideration for his
own priorities, this will be a call to action for him to help you.
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All that you have to do to make this work is to drive home the
fact that you respect him for his capabilities and legitimately
need what he has to offer. The primal protector will almost
immediately react to the fact that “the mate” is in distress.
You feel the same way, don’t you? Don’t we all actually want to
be appreciated for the things that actually make us people? Is it
really so ridiculous that we’d like our men to want us for our
attributes that -don’t- just happen to be those physical things
that trigger testosterone?
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Since you know how much you’d like to be appreciated for
those qualities of yours that aren’t just physical, we’ve got to
extend that same type of courtesy to our men when we suggest
things.
Now, here’s an example of the WRONG way to try and get your
man to show a little bit more affection to you every now and
then:
One of the absolute worst ways that you can try going about
getting your man’s genuine affection again is by attacking him
on the matter. If you try and turn your genuine desire for
affection into something that just sounds like a command, then
you’re basically asking for your efforts to fall on deaf ears with
him.
A much BETTER way that you can approach your man about
showing a bit more affection is:
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A man wants to feel like he’s being appreciated for everything
that he has to offer, just like you do. If you can show your man
that you seriously appreciate him, then there’s almost nothing
he won’t be willing to do in order to return the favor and get
your continued affection as a reward.
Here are some of the other things that you can say to your man
in order to really show your appreciation for him in a positive
and powerfully affective way:
- I can’t ever wait for the next time that you surprise me.
-Thank you for reminding me that there are still good men left
in the world.
- You are such a blessing to me. I feel warm just being near
you.
Lines like this just make it so that your man knows that
somebody appreciates his efficacy! In a world full of competition
where respect is never a guarantee, little things like this will lift
his spirits and make him cherish you.
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The 3rd Step: Request a commitment to the cause
Now let’s say, for example, that you’d really like it if your man
would take you out to eat. Do you know what the absolutely
worst way that you could try and get your man to do this would
be? If you guessed, “asked him why he never takes me out to
dinner”, then you’ve clearly been paying attention so far!
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you anywhere, try framing what you want a little more like this:
“Babe, I have been so worn out lately it feels like I’m losing my
mind. Can we go out to eat tonight?”
Now when you open up the request like this, you’re appealing
to his primal protector instinct by showing that your limits are
getting to you. Beyond just the concept of going out to eat, he’s
going to want to address the fact that you’re in distress and
“protect” your health by relieving your stress!
Now, when the date has been set, you have a lot more leeway
in suggesting that the two of you go out and do something else
on the weekend as well. When your man has agreed to take you
out, he’s in a zone that makes him a lot more agreeable - this is
a state that you can make the most of by suggesting special
little outings.
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The 4th Step: Positive Reinforcement and Punishment
The truth is that if your man is constantly doing things that you
hate and neglecting to do the things that you love, he’s
basically learned that it’s okay. You can’t expect to raise your
man like a mother raises her son, but at the same time, setting
boundaries and having your needs met is extremely important!
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2. Emotional rewards, which include any sign of adoration or
affection that you would send his way. Emotional rewards are
often actually even more powerful than physical rewards! This is
just simple positive reinforcement that lets him know his
behavior is genuinely appreciated.
“Your clothes on the floor are going to swallow the house whole
after I stop picking them up.”
The 5th Step: Give him a reminder of what the right track is
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Now if you feel like your man might be falling a little bit off-
track when it comes to the the positive behavior, all that you
have to do is give him a light reminder of what it means to do
the things that please you.
Just like before, it’s important to show that you appreciate your
man when you do this. Take a look at the example below:
Now, suppose that you want your man to start spending more
time with you in general. Here’s an example of how going about
it the wrong way can lead to disaster:
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being loveless, it was a failure from the very start. If you want
to handle this situation in a much CONSTRUCTIVE way, then
here’s how you would go about it:
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Section 8 - Emotion Devotion Lines.
Still, the reality here is that sex is a one-way ticket. You can’t
un-sleep with a guy, no matter how much justice it would do
you. Believe me, I would provide THE most generous donation
to the creation of a machine built for erasing stupid hookups
from your past, but we’re still more than a couple Olympics
games away from that kind of technology.
In the meantime, don’t pull out your hair over what’s been
done! You’re in good company here. It’s taken millions of years
of hooking up with losers to give us powerful strategies for
avoiding them, and if you take those strategies to heart, you’re
going to be a lot less likely to tarnish that sexual resume again.
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Now, suppose there’s a guy out there who’s actually worth
doing the dance beneath the sheets with? What if you actually
manage to meet a guy who’s worth more than half his weight in
salt? Isn’t that a scary thought? Can you fathom meeting a guy
that it’s a great idea to sleep with for multiple reasons?
Well here’s the thing about that: it happens a lot, and it may
have actually even happened to you! If it has happened for you,
I’m extremely happy for you and I hope that you spread that
good luck around generously. Now, the not-so-glamorous side
to this miracle of the universe is that it doesn’t guarantee that
he’ll stay.
It’s like tragic poetry, isn’t it? The useless ones will sometimes
line up like cheap dominoes to take you on a honeymoon to
their finest fast food restaurant after one bad lay, but the good
ones can disappear like a whistle in the wind.
If only there was a way that we could tip the odds in our favor
just a little bit more, and develop some kind of method to
making a real catch of a man understand that we’re catches too
- on second thought, there’s no point in wishing for that. We
don’t need to wish for it because there IS a way to make him
see you as more than a fling!
What I’m going to share with you here is going to give you what
it takes to fuse sex with effective communication. No, it doesn’t
mean that you have to demand that he tell you what his career
plans are when you’re in a position on top of him and he can’t
move!
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When I say that you can fuse sex and communication, I mean
that you can actually make him understand that the intercourse
actually means more to you than another notch on his
scoreboard. If the guy isn’t a complete sociopath, then there’s a
good chance he’ll actually have some consideration for the fact
that sex truly means something to you.
Far too many women make things a lot harder for themselves
by not being upfront about just how much sex means to them
besides a way to burn calories. You can’t fall into the same trap
and be afraid that you’ll “scare him off” if you get too deep
about what sex means to you.
Make it clear to your guy that there are actually some valid
thoughts dancing around in your head when it’s lying on his
chest after that heated one-on-one time. It’s a universal law
that a man is the easiest to “reason with” after he’s had sex,
because that’s the moment when all of his personal walls have
temporarily been laid down.
You really owe it to yourself to make the whole thing easy for
him by not holding back what your real thoughts are! Think of it
in the same way that you could think about leading a blind dog
on a walk through a brand new neighborhood - I say this
because of the session that I had with a particular client I had
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who had this problem in a bad way.
When this client of mine was stressing out about how it seemed
that sex meant nothing to this wonderful but uncommitted guy
she was seeing, I told her something that she didn’t really know
how to take when I first said it.
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doing a great job at vocalizing it, that’s when it’s time to take a
deep breath and let the logic creep back in. His feelings are far
and away out of his control, and society has encouraged him to
keep them under lock and key.
On the other hand, you might be dealing with the type of guy
who doesn’t really tend to think about his emotions much at all.
Don’t be fooled - just because a man doesn’t spend much time
thinking about the feelings doesn’t mean he isn’t affected by
them!
No matter what kind of man this is, you’ve got to do what you
can to help him address the fact that having sex with you isn’t
going to be a no-strings-attached deal. You may not be able to
control everything he feels, but the connection between sexual
release and emotions can be bridged much easier than a lot of
people know.
So how does this all connect to ensuring that a man doesn’t see
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you as just another one-night stand? It means that if you can
trigger the man’s amygdala while telling him what your feelings
about sex are, you can basically have him feeling that he’s your
soul mate. It’s not an exaggeration at all, it’s just a show of
appreciation for basic psychology!
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different emotions within him!
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memorization - you just need to be able to get a handle on
what the common theme is before you actually use them. I
have just a few examples of the different kinds Emotion
Devotion lines that you can use to nudge him into the full
spectrum of his feelings when he has sex on the brain.
The first of these lines that I’m going to share with you is the
most basic and versatile example. For the purpose of this little
demonstration, the hypothetical volunteer’s name is going to be
“Tom” - feel free to substitute Tom’s name for whoever might
apply in your life!
Now, even though this line is very simple, it’s easy to see how it
can create that emotional cocktail that I’ve been talking about
so far. When you say that you’re getting “mixed feelings” about
the fun that you have together it’s basically a cut-and-dry
reflection of the versatile platter of emotions that all humans
feel.
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to stay with one another - of course, we disregard this “law” all
of the time for practical, modern world reasons!
When you bring up the fact that you have mixed feelings about,
his primal brain is immediately going to react in a panic due to
the fact that the “law” is being challenged. Normally it would be
no big deal, due to the fact that the afterglow of sex doesn’t
really tend to last for a terribly long time.
Now, here’s a slightly more ‘layered” line that you can use to
the same effect...
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Now this is one powerhouse of a line! With this line, you are
directly ADDRESSING the fact that there’s something more
significant than just a physical romp happening between the
two of you. You don’t ask him if there’s something more
significant happening between of you, you just tell him that
there’s something there to acknowledge.
In the short moment of time after the two of you have had sex,
his feelings of raw connection to you are naturally going to be
at a higher level than they would typically be on any ordinary
day - therefore, anything that you mention regarding a
connection with him is going to seem a little bit more authentic
by default.
Now when you mention that you think it might be a good idea
for the two of you to actually take a break from anything that
might be too intimate, his amygdala is going to get activated in
a big way. When your man gets hit by an unconscious feeling
that source of his satisfaction is being threatened, his emotional
temperature skyrockets.
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you’ve basically made it so that your feelings are inseparable
from what you have to offer physically.
Now, there’s another situation that can arise that might require
a bit more creativity! We’re all adults here, so we can
acknowledge the fact that sometimes a little fun on the
mattress IS all we’re after...at first.
Well the first thing that you should do is forgive yourself for
being born with emotions. Shame on us, right? The second
thing that you should do is make an executive decision NOT to
keep it a secret from the man.
Just because you may have decided to keep things casual in the
beginning doesn’t mean that you’ve signed a contract that
forbids being honest. Even if you feel that things might be
complicated if you bring things up with him, you don’t need to
worry about that, because things are clearly already
complicated; being honest makes it SIMPLER.
A surefire way that you can make this situation more difficult
than it has to be is by trying to go into denial about how you
feel - this never works. Your feelings WILL manifest eventually,
and it’s better that you confront that lovey-dovey demon early
in its lifespan before it gets too strong and makes a fool of you.
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On the other hand, he may or may not be feeling the same
thing that you are. Even if he’s not wrestling with little imps on
his shoulder pestering him about his true feelings, this can still
work in your favor. Remember, your goal here is to make sure
that he knows that you can’t be considered a casual fling any
longer. No exceptions!
Now, here’s a good way that you can break it to the boytoy that
your casual arrangement is starting to turn into a not-so-casual
experience:
It really can’t get more honest and direct than this! It’s really a
shame that there are so many woman who believe that there
isn’t any way that they can show this kind of honesty without
coming off as needy. This is complete disclosure, but it doesn’t
put pressure on the guy to move in with you and throw away
his dirty magazines.
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What this is doing to your guy is stimulating his amygdala to
the absolute max! After a good session in the sheets, when you
hit him with the fact that you love it, he’s going to feel a
seriously positive wave of validation. The catch is that the
validation is stirred in with a little taste of rejection at the same
time.
Even if he only wanted to invest his body into the sex and
nothing else, doing this is going to make him consciously
associate the sex you’ve had with the concept of commitment.
The next Emotion Devotion line is just a tad bit more nuanced
than what’s been covered so far. Let’s say that you’ve been
having a healthy dose of casual sex, but your feelings are
getting real and you want to test for a transition into something
more.
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Rushing into the transition from sex buddies to boyfriend and
girlfriend is definitely not high on the list of ways to de-stress
your life, but at the same time, you have to do something about
it.
If you’ve been sleeping with the kind of guy who appears highly
affectionate outside of sex but hasn’t mentioned anything in
terms of a relationship just yet, you can use a line like this...
This type of line puts the man on the spot! He’s going to have
to take moment to contemplate the meaning of the time that he
spends with you, and along with that, the concept of being
committed to you.
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Section 9 - Intimacy Yoo-Hoo Lines
Before we even know the meaning of the words “boy” and “girl”,
society surrounds us with a gender-based frame. A person can
either embrace that frame or completely reject it, but either
way, the identity they forge for themselves is a reaction to that
frame!
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Even though the double-standard for emotional expression is
discussed a lot more openly than it used to be, it still holds a lot
of weight today!
Many men from cultures across the globe still live under
constant pressure to avoid coming off as soft or weak in any
way. From a young age, boys have the “men don’t cry” mindset
drilled into them - anger is glorified and sadness is practically
taboo! Things have gotten a little bit less rigid in the western
world, but we can still see fragments of it everywhere we look.
When you think about all of the pressure that some of these
men are under to stick to what society expects, it’s no wonder
that so many of them act like they’re emotionally constipated!
Have you ever had a man assume that your gender made you
incapable of doing something you could do since you were five
years old? Believe it or not, a man might have the same kind of
frustration when it’s assumed that he should be able to handle
ANYTHING or be stripped of his “man points”.
Men are usually left with only a small circle their closest friends,
their family, and their significant other to feel comfortable
revealing their emotional struggles to. Sometimes they’re too
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embarrassed to show their sensitive side to a single living soul!
A man can wind up feeling like his emotions are something that
he has to bury beneath a giant pile of vices.
You probably already know this as well, but I’ll state it just for
the sake of being thorough: some elements of the double
standard are actually healthy. The way that society expects men
to handle their emotions is what his “primal protector” sleeps
on. For thousands of years, men lived and fought to be the best
hunters, warriors, organizers and providers.
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Before the human race developed enough to have any real
emotional insight, all that mattered was strength and
toughness. In this day and age, where the mind carries more
weight than the physical body, the effects of our ancient and
brutal roots still haven’t worn off.
Think about what we’ve said so far about the amygdala, and
how it activates when a man goes into fight or flight mode.
Even in civilized settings, a man still has that little tick in his
mind that makes him associate a show of weakness with a
threat to his survival.
Right here and now, you can be that equalizer for your man
that he can’t find with anyone else. You can offer him some
relief from society’s impossible demands in a way that won’t
embarrass him!
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In order to give our man that emotional relief that he’s so
desperate to have but even more desperate to hide, we need to
use the power of intimacy. You’re not alone if want your man to
be more intimate in general, so when it comes down to it, this
is a mutually beneficial situation!
By the end of this section, you will know how to covertly give
your man some sweet emotional relief and have enjoy a little
bit more more intimacy. You don’t have to compromise you or
your man’s needs in order to work, and if all goes as planned,
the strength of your relationship will double!
The timing of when you try and appeal to your man’s emotions
is CRITICAL! Don’t underestimate how intense his paranoia of
showing sensitivity can be. In the hunter and gatherer ages,
even a second of weakness could be the difference between
eating and dying.
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For example, let’s say that you and your man have just
managed to get over a little shouting match. When the dust has
settled and a couple can use their indoor voices again, there are
probably still lingering “echoes” of the argument creating a tiny
bit of tension. Even if you want to talk about what’s happened
in more calmly, most men won’t want to address it.
Even when there isn’t any immediate sign of conflict, the man
will still be in a mode that makes him want to avoid showing
any sign of being affected by it. As crazy as it may seem, even
showing that he’s AFFECTED by a minor argument can feel like
an admission of weakness to him - it is truly a 24/7 battle
inside of his mind!
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should be make them feel so comfortable that they voluntarily
give up the truth all on their own. You don’t want to literally
treat your man like some kind of a criminal, so you definitely
want to avoid making it seem like you’re putting him on trial!
“Babe, you need to stop being so afraid to feel and just let it
out! It’s not illegal to show your feelings every once in a while.
If I feel like crying, I just cry and nobody judges me for it! Just
be honest about what’s bothering you and life won’t be so
stressful.”
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when we can be a little bit more emotionally open about the
things that are bothering us, and any woman would be telling
the truth if she said that she wouldn’t be mocked for openly
crying - that’s where everything “right” about this argument
ends.
If you tell your man that he needs to grow up and just stop
caring about the image created by crying, it’s just going to
come off as inconsiderate. He may not even react in a way that
shows he’s offended by it, and that will be directly related to the
reason why he doesn’t want to reveal his emotions in the very
first place.
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of the gender-based double standards in the world!
“Honey, I have to let you know that you really inspire me. No
matter what we go through, I know that you can be the rock I
depend on to get through it all. I admire you because I know
that staying tough can be the hardest thing in the world
sometimes. Whenever you feel like you just need to get get
something off your chest, let me know and I’ll be there to
listen.”
Can’t you see the massive difference between phrasing the line
like this and the wrong way that I mentioned earlier? Trust me,
the difference between this kind of encouragement and the
“wrong” example is like fire and ice.
First of all, this line opens up in a way that lets the man know
that you legitimately respect his role as a man before anything
else. Just by showing that you respect the kind of standards
that he has to live up to in order to be your man, you avoid
making the most crucial mistake that anyone could make when
it comes to understanding double standards about gender.
In all of these different lines that you can use to make your
man more willing to open up to you, the key is to afford him the
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opportunity to let his guard down instead of making him feel
like you’re telling him to let his guard down.
“Babe, I hope you know that not a day goes by that I don’t
think about how lucky I am to have your love. All it takes is one
look for me to sense just how much you care. One thing I really
hope is that you never feel like you have to hold anything back
from me. If there’s ever anything that upsets or annoys you
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about me, you can always let me know!”
When you use this line, your man’s natural response might
actually be to deny that there’s anything immediately bugging
him about you or the world in general. If he denies the fact that
anything could possibly make him upset, don’t fight him on it!
You and he already both understand that there will be times
when everything isn’t so easy to take in stride.
When you use a line like this, what you’re doing is making sure
that your man never feels that he has to walk on eggshells
around you. The expectation that society has of men to always
be in 100% control of their emotions can make them feel like
they’re always walking a razor-thin line between respect and
shame.
When you open the floor for him to express his frustration, the
result is generally always positive in the long run, no matter he
might respond. The point is that he’s not going be as likely to
think that expressing himself to you will make it seem like he’s
less of a man for doing it.
If you feel like you can be just a little bit more direct with your
man about the struggles he’s facing to maintain a strong
impression, then there’s a way you can do it without going
overboard! The example below shows a way that you can talk
to him about emotional repression in a more direct way and still
avoid making him feel like he’s being put on the spot.
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“You are truly a gift to me. Beyond just being a wonderful
partner, you are a wonderful man in general. I feel like I’ve
won the lottery every time that I think about the fact we get to
share this life together. I’ve been a little bit concerned about
something lately though. Sometimes you seem really consumed
by your thoughts, and I hope I can be there for you if you’re in
any pain.”
Once again, this line LEADS IN with the fact that you respect
and love him before anything else. Most men are deathly afraid
of losing the love of their partner if they don’t seem strong
enough, and so reassuring him of your feelings really takes a
massive weight off of his shoulders.
Now, the point where you get more direct about the things that
might be bothering him has to be handled gently. With the
above line, take note of the fact that you wouldn’t be telling him
that you’ve come to the conclusion that he’s actually
experiencing pain or stress.
By saying that it seems like he’s been really pensive, you don’t
come off as though you’re TELLING him his feelings. Just like
the other Intimacy Yoo Hoo lines, what you’re doing here is
simply laying the foundation to let him know that your company
is a place where his reputation is safe and sound.
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tempting to tell him that he’s not invincible, let him have the
satisfaction of at least making an effort to assert his mental
toughness.
There’s another variation of the Intimacy Yoo Hoo line that you
might personally be more comfortable with! This next example
will be something that you can use if you want to try and have
him see himself from your point of view just a little bit more
clearly!
“Do you know what I see when I look at you? I see a person
who reminds me of just how strong a man can really be. I know
it might sound a little bit weird, but it’s true. Whenever I look
at you, I can feel the strength flowing out of you, and it makes
me feel strong too! Being by your side really makes me feel like
I could rule the world with you.
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With this line, you go just a little bit farther in terms of really
letting your man see himself through your eyes. Never forget, a
man is ALWAYS thinking of the impression that he gives off, and
the way that his woman thinks of him can be one of the most
potentially troubling things of all for him to stress over!
When you specifically tell him exactly what you think when you
think about him, it’s like you’re giving him DIRECT reassurance
that he has nothing to worry about. He won’t be able to control
the way that people look at him when it comes to his personal
life, but when it comes to you, he’s going to know that he
doesn’t have to get anxious about the most important person.
All of these Intimacy Yoo Hoo Lines are meant to help your man
warm up to the IDEA of getting more open with you! You can’t
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expect him to become a fountain of emotion overnight, but
leading him to a place that he feels okay about potentially
letting you see his weak spots is a huge step forward!
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Section 10 - Light of my Life Lines
Has a man ever made you feel like you knew the sight of his
back than you knew him as a person?
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The first time that you experience the “man of your life” treat
you like a soap opera rerun, you might be so stunned by it that
you can’t even tell what’s happening. In the worst case
scenario, you might not have even realized you were dumped
until you don’t even get a dial tone when you call him.
You join a class of people who are taught a cruel lesson about
the difference between the sound of a blocked call and missed
call, free of charge and full of pain.
After all of the sleepless nights and slept-away days, you have
nothing but a single torturous question: “What happened?!”
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into “modes” that even the most level-headed among us might
slip into if she gets desperate:
If you slip into the mode where you’re pleading for your man to
come back to you like he’s the oxygen you need to breathe, you
could completely lose track of when the days begin and end.
You might look up and realize that you’ve made 100
unanswered phone calls to his number in the same span of time
that a normal person only 10 calls.
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more than done.
The best way that you can avoid declining into this poor state is
to understand that there’s no point in trying to bargain with
your man to make him stay. When it’s become apparent that
your man is slipping away, don’t get anxious and give him a list
of reasons why he should stay.
No matter how valid the reasons that you have for him staying
or the reasons that he presents for leaving might be, at the end
of the day, the emotional disconnect can’t be logically reversed.
If you keep on trying to give sensible reasons, you’re doomed
to fail.
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In addition to making sure that you don’t try to bring your man
back by begging, you’ve got to be careful about the things that
you do as well - this what we’re going to touch on in the next
mode of interest...
If you ever fall into this state, then you can become completely
blind to the fact that your constant attempts to please him will
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only push him further and further away. There is almost nothing
less attractive than raw desperation, and that applies to both
genders. This mode is basically the highest tangible form of
desperation that there is in a failing relationship.
If you fall into a continual cycle of trying to win your man back
with excessive favors, then not only is it doomed to fail, but
you’ll basically be enslaving yourself to your own desperation!
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emotionally distant man back into your life.
Far too many women fool themselves into thinking they’re just
showing love, when in reality, they’re just making themselves
antagonistic and less sympathetic.
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you for feeling a massive urge to vent out everything you feel
about the guy who left you in the emotional wastebasket.
Playing the blame game is toxic for some unique reasons apart
from the first two behavior patterns. Of course blaming the man
won’t do anything to get him back to your side, but in addition
to that, the strain that it can have on your daily life can be
completely devastating.
Even though you may only mean to direct the your negative
feelings towards the man, carrying all of that negativity around
will allow it to bleed out into other parts of your world. If you
keep on tearing your man down too much, then you might be
prone to fixating on that bitterness you feel even in situations
that aren’t related to him at all.
I once had a client who vilified her man for so long and so
much that she actually started losing hair from the stress. Her
friends were there for her in the beginning, but because she
never found a way to make peace with what had happened, it
kept haunting her social life.
Her friends became exhausted by the way that she could never
go without ranting about what a bastard her man had been, and
one by one, they slowly dropped out of her life until she was all
alone. It was an extremely hard case to deal with! She didn’t
seem to be a naturally bitter person, but she never found the
strength to rise above her first real taste of romantic loss.
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entitled to feel hurt and angry. You’re not crazy for feeling like
calling him out on making it a little bit harder to smile. If you
really want to enjoy your life, however, you owe it yourself not
to let your pain take over the good things you still have!
Blaming the man will never make him come back to you, nor
will it bring you any kind of inner peace. It might temporarily
feel like some kind of release, but it’s no different than picking
an emotional scab and turning it into a permanent scar.
So now you know the three major modes to avoid when you
feel like a man is leaving you behind! You know that it’s
extremely important to refrain from:
The key thing to understand here is the same thing that we’ve
covered in-depth in the previous sections: the truth of what
makes a man desire a certain woman more than anything else
in the world!
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As I’ve said before, just starting the relationship doesn’t
guarantee that it’s going to have staying power. Even after a
man and woman have decided to commit and form a couple,
that logical decision to give the relationship a title needs
constant substance to survive.
If you really want to get your man back, then the key to
success is showing that man your value in a way that doesn’t
come off as desperate or needy. Women who don’t know any
better might think that the best way to show an ex-boyfriend
their value is to make drastic attempts to please or convince
them, but as we’ve established, that’s a recipe for disaster.
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Since you now know the three terrible “modes” that a lot of
woman enter when they get desperate, the true solution is
incredibly simple: do the exact OPPOSITE! Instead of losing
sleep over the man, make a choice not to give him any more
energy than he deserves.
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your relationship, then you’re wasting your time by madly
fighting for it.
“Babe, I think you’re an amazing person, but lately I’m just not
feeling connected to you. I want to make amazing memories
with you, but it just doesn’t seem like the feeling is mutual. I
want nothing but the best for us both, and I think it might be
best if we had our distance for now.”
Gently but firmly cutting the thread out of respect for your own
needs shows a lot more value than going crazy trying to keep a
distant man tied down. Instead of the drama and fallout he
respected, he might not even know how to react to the way you
politely turn the page on him. He won’t be able to help but
wonder when you started to doubt him as a lover.
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powerful form of reverse psychology.
When he gets the feeling that you could have a perfectly happy
life without him around, your value is going to rise
substantially!
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Section 11 – Secret Hanky Panky
Lines
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As mentioned before, men have a desire for emotional
fulfillment that they often try very hard to conceal. Lots of men
have a crippling fear of looking like “wimps”, no matter how silly
it might seem from the outside looking in. Men have it drilled
into them that showing too much emotion makes them less
masculine, but this doesn’t wipe out their need to feel
something.
At the end of the day, everything comes back to what you can
do in order to get through to your man’s emotional pressure
points. When you break through to a man’s emotional side, it’s
almost as if you’ve found a way that you can massage his most
sensitive, INVISIBLE erogenous zone.
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fixation on certain women, had been touched in a profoundly
emotional way. If you recall, one of Lance’s men had been a
notorious pickup artist, and even he got emotionally
compromised in the end.
We’ve done a lot of talking about how you can completely pull
the rug out out from under a man’s sense of security by
appealing to the smallest, most seldom-appreciated parts of his
biological makeup. In this chapter, we’re basically going to fuse
the power of soft emotional stimulation and pure, sensual
seduction.
The kind of verbal technique we’re dealing with here is one that
is absolutely flush with powerful IMAGES created by the spoken
words. When it comes to seduction, the images created by the
words that are spoken mean EVERYTHING.
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Just as mentioned in the beginning, the mind is pumped full of
images as soon as it processes a spoken word. With Hank
Panky lines, we’re going to be taking complete advantage of
just how much influence you can have when you make full use
of the mental images you can create in a man’s mind on a
whim.
“Sometimes I can just feel your gaze drilling into me when you
look my way. Just knowing that your eyes are on me is enough
to thrill me.”
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but at the same time, there’s much more subtext at work.
When you use a word like “drilling”, the impression that you’re
going to make on him becomes incredibly very clear. The
images created in his mind are going to take it to a very specific
place!
The way that your man looks at you reflects all of the pressure
and tension he’s felt since the very first moment that he’s even
seen you. All of the uncertainty that he’s ever felt about
meeting your gaze, the way he feels about being in your
presence, all of that will be wrapped up in the simple
description of how you feel when he looks at you.
“Every time you get near me, it’s like I feel your touch before it
even happens. Having your skin touch mine is enough to make
me feel high all on its own. Drugs can’t create that kind of
happiness.”
This line is a little just a little bit more direct about the physical
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aspect, but the emotional aspect is still very much there. The
skin on skin contact that you’re mentioning here is going to get
his imagination going for sure, but that takes the backseat
compared to how feel about his nearness.
A man wants to feel like he’s valued for more than just his
body, and when you mention that you get serious high off his
nearness, it lets him know that you have a desire for his
essence. There is no greater sense of validation for a man than
the feeling that a woman wants him for ALL that he is, and
nothing less.
At the same time that his mental images are tantalizing him,
he’ll also be have that sweet sense of satisfaction from knowing
that you legitimately want him for what he has to offer as a
person in general.
Now with just the thought of a hug, you’ve already got him
imagining the sensation of touching you. Mentioning what it
feels like when he hugs you from behind provides another
dimension to the sensuality.
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Telling him that you love it when he hugs you will make him
think about all of the different times that he’s done it, and
beyond that, all of the times that he’ll do it in the future as well.
When you say that the moment could last forever, you got him
thinking about the prospect of staying with you for a very long
time. It may not literally be forever, but that seed will be
planted in his head.
The seed that a Hanky Panky line plants in your man’s mind,
created by a sensual image, is a great way to forge a
connection to your man in ways that might not be immediately
apparent. The physical aspect of the technique shouldn’t be
mistaken for something that’s “shallow” - the physical aspect
can actually be used to make your man relate your unconscious
minds.
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When you go into detail about how you feel sensations in places
like the shoulders and arms, he’ll immediately be able to relate
to that sensation by imagining that he’s feeling those things
himself.
When the man starts to image that he’s feeling those tingles in
his body in the same places that you’ve mentioned, you’ve
instantly created a powerful subconscious connection between
the two of you. Both his mind AND his body will be linked to the
words that you said, and to top it all off, the nature of those
words will center around how much you care about him.
Here’s how you can take a Hanky Panky line’s dual appeal and
introduce the element of memories to make things even more
intimate and powerful.
“Do you remember how it felt on that day when we ran into
each other for the first time? Such an amazing moment. I
remember our arms just brushing a little bit too closely by
mistake, but when it happened, it actually felt really good.
Thinking about it actually still turns me on.
In this Hanky Panky line, you’ve got your sexual tension hard at
work in the focus on physical contact. The description of the
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meeting as an “amazing moment” introduces that little
emotional spin on things that’s going to make him start
considering his own feelings and the ways that they relate to
you.
The real treasure about this line is the fact that it would focus
on a time that stretches into the past. The focus on the past is
going to be extraordinarily powerful due to the fact that it’s
going to take him back to a time in his life that will be full of
kinds of sights, sounds and smells in his memory.
Now, to bring things back to the present, let’s say that you
want your man to think about you in a way that affects the way
that he feels on a daily basis. For this type of line, you don’t
have to look for a moment in the past. In this Hanky Panky line,
you can put explicit focus on your day-to-day lives instead;
here’s how you can accomplish this...
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“I just have to let you know, I really believe that I have a
serious addiction to the way that you stoke my hair. Every
single day, I can’t help but look forward to when I get to feel it
again.”
Now this Hanky Panky Line isn’t quite as loaded as the other
ones that I’ve mentioned so far, but rest assured, you’re still
going to be getting the best kind of effect out of it. The fact that
this doesn’t relate to anything objectively sexual actually gives
the emotional aspect a little bit more power; of course, the
sensual implication of stroking your hair is still there!
Now the real impact of this particular line would from the the
fact that you mention looking forward to feeling him stroke your
hair on a daily basis. The fact that you mention the him stroking
your hair every day is going to make him associate his feelings
about daily life with physical contact between the two of you.
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Now, the next Hanky Panky Line is going to draw from the
power of awakening your man’s primal protector. If you can
recall everything that we’ve said about the primal protector so
far, you know that a man draws an extreme sense of
satisfaction from being validated by his mate.
With the Hanky Panky line example below, you can awaken that
primal protector and get the awesome sensory effect that we’ve
been discussing so far in this chapter.
“Honestly babe, when I’m around you I feel like I’m royalty. I
feel so lucky to have a sexy king as my man.”
Just taking a quick inventory of this Hanky Panky Line lets you
see that the most important elements are accounted for. The
word “sexy” brings up all of that imagery that you want in order
for him to get excited in a physical way, but the real power
comes from the rest of the line.
The fact that you tell him you feel so special and royal around
him is a sign that he makes you feel protected, and as
mentioned before, the primal protector exists in order to
PROTECT his mate! When you say something that tells him that
he’s making you feel safe, it’s basically a confirmation that his
most ancient and sacred duty is being successfully fulfilled!
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The powerful biological effect that he’ll get from the line will be
mixed in with great feeling of emotional validation that comes
with being honored as your man! The full power of the Hanky
Panky line can be summoned any time that you compare your
man to something powerful and influential, like a king or an
emperor.
Now, a seriously unique way that you can use the Hanky Panky
line to relate to your man is actually by describing its effects in
terms of how it makes you feel. If you want your man to be
consumed by a constant fantasy of you, then you can make this
happen by describing the how you feel in a similar way!
“I may not have mentioned it before, but the other day you
looked so good that it was impossible to stop thinking about
you. I was trying to work, but I couldn’t get rid of this image in
my mind of that sexy man that I get to call my own.”
Every aspect of the Hanky Panky line is here, just like all the
others, but the spin on this particular phrasing is that WE
describe OUR FEELINGS in the way that we would hope for our
men to experience their own fantasies about us.
When you describe the way that you felt when he looked a
certain way, he’s instantly going to put himself back into that
day when he looked just as you’re describing. As he’s going
through that little time-traveling trip in his mind to the day
when you said he looked unbelievably good, the fact that you
included a sexy element is going to effect the direction his
imagination goes.
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So now you see that the Hanky Panky line is one of the best
ways that you can apply just about everything we’ve covered so
far, at the same time! Your man’s primal protector and sexual
drive will be catered to, but at the same time, you’re going to
be taking care of his secret craving for emotional closeness as
well!
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Section 12 - Slap of Love Lines
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Maybe you change the activity altogether!
Do you know what the difference between the first and second
scenarios is? It’s really simple. In the first scenario, when you
changed the plan to accommodate the ones it wouldn’t work for,
you had no control of the “frame”. You sacrificed the frame,
your control over the situation, because it would the path of
least resistance and make that person happy.
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relationships comes from the fact that they gave up ALL of their
frame control to win the approval of their man!
If you don’t want your own desperation to kick you into a ditch,
you can use a technique that will give you respectable frame
control. Frame control commands respect, and with respect,
you can re-attract the most aloof and hard-to-get men in the
entire world!
Beyond just being able to renew the attraction of just about any
man in the world, using the frame control techniques that I’m
going to be sharing with you here can benefit you in a lot of
other situations as well; for example, the situation that involves
another woman, perhaps?
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exactly what you want it to be.
Just like the other techniques that we’ve mentioned so far, this
is going to make it so that your man is going to end up being at
the mercy of his own speculation about you at the end of the
day! Instead of trying to make your man know all of the
reasons why you’re worth it, which we know now is a flawed
goal, you’ll make him wish he knew more in the very first place!
With this technique, you’ll learn how you can absolutely revel in
the challenge that more “hard-to-get” men pose you. Instead of
being intimidated or discouraged by how you might feel when a
man doesn’t seem immediately receptive, you can enjoy it as
an opportunity to use what you’ve learned here!
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man’s perception of you into one of your greatest powers.
Everything that you’ve been learning so far is going to be
present in some form in the lesson here, so if you’ve been
studying well, this should all come naturally to you!
It’s very simple! When you’re dealing with a man, you can be a
little bit tongue-in-cheek about the way that you respond to any
man that you’re having a conversation with. The twist to this
kind of technique is that the “tools” you use are the words that
he speak, which means that your ability to use this technique is
practically infinite.
Now don’t feel like you need to use every single syllable that
comes out of your man’s mouth as a way to draw up some kind
of sign that he’s attracted, because if you do that, you run the
risk of seriously overdoing it. If you can moderate the balance
between how much you twist his words and how much you
communicate him, you will be almost unnaturally attractive to
him.
Now the best thing about effectively creating frame control with
this technique is just how seamless it is if you do it the right
way! If you can master and personalize the nature with which
you handle this technique, then your man won’t ever have any
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idea what it is that you’re actually doing in the first place. The
entire time that you’re influencing him, he’ll think it was his
idea!
The man will feel like his mind is being taken to a completely
alien and unfamiliar place on his own volition, and he’ll feel
completely helpless against his feelings of mysterious attraction
to you. The script will be flipped and his defenses will be laid
down completely, giving you the best possible angle to make
the most powerful advance possible.
You say: “Funny you should say that, because I was actually
thinking the exact same thing! Something tells me that I might
be a little bit too hot for you to handle, so it’s probably for the
best.”
Now check out the kind of impression that you’re making when
you say something like this. Instead of making reacting to this
rejection by getting dramatic or depressed, we make it sound
like he’s afraid to commit and that it’s the real reason he’s
having second thoughts.
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When a man feels like his own boldness is being tested, he’s
prone to becoming incredibly defensive. He might try to save
face and deny the fact that he has any fear at all about getting
involved with you, and as soon as that happens, you have
assumed total control of the frame and can appreciate your
handiwork.
So you see here, you don’t have to actually try and do any
complex verbal back flips to make a technique like this work. All
that you really have to do is make an implication about the true
nature of what he said in order flip the script and completely
change the frame of the exchange.
Now the effect of flipping the script on a man like this doesn’t
necessarily have to happen right away in order to get the man
thinking in a way that you can seriously benefit from. You really
only have to do it once, and after that, the seed will have been
firmly planted!
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When you see how well this technique can work with minimal
effort, you might think start thinking that it’s almost unfair. You
shouldn’t feel terribly guilty about using this technique,
however, because it’s just a matter of leveling the playing field.
With a single sentence, it’s like the fuse has been lit for an
explosive chain of changes in his emotional mind.
Now because we know that the man probably has it in his head
that we’re too emotionally fragile to take what he said in a well-
adjusted way, we’re in the perfect position to completely flip his
expectations right back over into his face.
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you can reject the man’s message at the same time that you
overtly seem to be on the same page as him.
The thing that you prove to this man is that you’re completely
unflinching in the face of rejection, making a powerful
impression on him right away. Lots of men are very accustomed
to having women completely subscribe to exactly what they
say, so when faced with a REJECTION of his claim, it will be like
slap to his subconscious
Twisting his words around into forms that make him insecure
about his intentions will force him into defense mode. He leaves
himself wide open to the poison of his own ego, and once he’s
made that mistake, your work is pretty much done.
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exactly what he meant in the very beginning, he’ll be practically
blind to the fact that he’s doing exactly what you wanted him to
in the very first place. He’s going to get so caught up with
justifying his words that the kinks in his armor will be
completely exposed
Now here are some more examples of ways that we could take
something a man confidently states, and then twist those
statements to slap his subconscious brain silly.
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shows the slightest sign of being unsure or rustled, you’ll know
that you’ve managed to make a powerful and lasting impact on
him.
A lot of men are commonly taught that the best way to make a
woman ready to have sex with him is to butter them up with
platonic compliments. Even if the guy is a complete stud, we
can maintain control of the frame by making it completely
apparent that we know what the score is.
Once the guy has been faced with the fact that you’re not
completely oblivious to any attempts at being slick, he’ll be a
little less sure about how good his chances are - this creates
nervousness, and nervousness weakens control of the frame by
a great degree.
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Him – Maybe we should just stay casual friends
You – That’s probably the right call. We would probably
be the most dysfunctional couple ever, I’d drive you
insane within a week.
Now when the date has just about wrapped up, there are some
lines you can use to close out the date on a strong note...
Guys tend to think they’re a lot slicker than they actually are
when it comes to “discretely” checking a girl out. Making a
comment about him checking him out, no matter when or how
he did, will instantly put him on his guard and wonder about
just how obvious he was.
If the date has managed to reach its end without incident, it’s
definitely a reason to be grateful! Still, even if things went
smoothly and you feel good about letting it go a little bit further,
you can benefit from keeping the frame within your control.
When you say that you hope he can keep things up, you’re
laying on the pressure to keep up whatever good impression
that he’s made so far. He’s probably already thinking about how
he can maintain your interest in the long run, so when you
mention it directly, it’s instantly going to lay even more
pressure on him create that positive nervousness you want in
him.
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Now with this line you could be completely telling the truth
about wanting to see him again, you’re putting him on edge by
challenging his masculinity at the same time that you show
interest. The man might think that there’s nothing more that he
has to do in terms of getting you interested, but this will ensure
that he knows he still has to keep his A-game up!
Now if you’re in a relationship, you can still use these Love Slap
Lines to a great effect. All you have to do is apply the same
principle of making sure that you test him when he feels like
he’s in a position of power. For example, if he’d acting
extremely angry, moody or trying to lecture you, try something
like this:
“The way you get those lines in your face when you’re
mad is so adorable!”
You don’t have to say exactly what’s listed here in order to have
a lasting effect. Take the general principle of the changing the
frame with Slap of Love Lines, and the situations that you can
use it in are endless!
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Section 13 - Soulmate Mishmash
Lines
The woman has been with her man for more than a couple of
weeks but not quite as much as a year. Things haven’t
completely fallen apart; as a matter of fact, the relationship has
actually been more or less stable! There is no disrespect,
destructive arguing or dishonesty.
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Now when I say that you should keep building on your intuition,
I don’t mean that you need to start trying to force the idea of
commitment down his throat. As you might recall from chapter
dealing with the worst ways to act towards a distant man,
trying too hard to convince a man of the “logical” reasons to
commit to you will almost always backfire.
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last thing that we’re after!
Now if you’ve already made a point to tell the man that you’re
interested in things like settling down and having a children,
you don’t have to panic! A couple utterances of the fact that
you don’t hate the idea of having kids in the future isn’t
irreparable damage, especially if he’s still hanging around after
the fact and giving off sings that he’s still interested.
Now naturally, you have some vale for your time. You don’t
want to look back on this day 15 years from now and wonder
how you could have found better advice on getting a man
interested in the idea of commitment. Don’t worry, because if
you follow this advice to the letter, you’re not going to have
anything to worry about with creating commitment interest ever
again!
I’m serious. The number one reason that so many men are
paralyzed at the idea of committing to a woman is due to the
simple fact that they can’t stand the idea of being perpetually
BORED! No kind of man, no matter what kind of lifestyle he
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leads, will ever enjoy the idea of having to face endless
monotony!
Now just because I said dynamic doesn’t mean it’s time for you
to hop online and buy yourself a flamethrower and nipple
clamps! Dynamic means that your company is, to put it imply,
more than just your company! You have to bring something to
the table that makes him want to stay that’s more than just
sharing the same oxygen most the of time!
The best way to show a man that you have something to offer?
For starters, you can show him that his life isn’t the only thing
that defines you. Being too needy will make seem like you need
him around in order to be alive; it sounds unfortunate, woman
who make this mistake seem more like emotional leeches than
romantic partners!
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More than just having love for your man and what he
represents as a person, you’ve got to to start by making sure
that your own life, your own interests, and your own friends are
still preserved outside of the relationship!
Naturally, when you and the man got to know each other much
better over time, the initial pressure wore off! Neither of you
thought much of it at the time, but surely enough, he came to
find that he just wasn’t as anxious about being around you as
he used to be!
Now that you’re ready to kick things up to the next level, your
critical job in this situation is to see to it that he re-experiences
that thrill at the idea of sharing a life with you, EVEN if that life
of yours isn’t exactly a mystery anymore!
Even if the man does have some strong feelings about getting
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into a relationship with you, the anxiety that he feels about
wondering how the next few years will pan out can put a cork in
his readiness to go all the way!
Naturally, one of the best ways to make sure that man doesn’t
fear the the relationship is to give him time to be confident in
the fact that you aren’t a vampire! A man who can go through
with the decision to get married, even with half of everything
he’s ever made at stake, is becoming a rarer and rarer thing
every year; this is going to take time, and there’s no way
around that!
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I had a client who was absolutely up to their neck in stress
about the fact that her boyfriend of over five years still wasn’t
ready to bring up the idea of marriage. It was the most
distressing thing because he had been a wonderful boyfriend in
just about every way, but getting him to just hang up his
bachelor gloves and settle down was starting to seem
completely impossible.
Now just like any typical couple, they did occasionally get into
the odd argument now and then. What struck me as interesting
was the fact that, from what she told me, all of their arguments
seemed to be over things that were petty! Truly dysfunctional
couples will tend to have a serious fallout over a real problem,
but they only seemed to fight about the most minor things.
What was really apparent was the fact that these arguments
were definitely a cover for something else much more
meaningful. In his uncertainty to commit, the man was looking
for any and every small thing that could distract her from
getting committed.
A man is taking note of the way that you react to the little
things that bother you! If you act incredibly negative about the
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small things, he’s going to imagine what it would be like to live
with you and have you reacting to those things every day in the
house!
With that being said, there are three important things to keep
in mind:
It’s perfectly fine to want to spend as much time with your man
as you can, but at the end of the day, it’s always best to make
sure that you yourself are capable of functioning on your own
before you become codependent.
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If you can show him that he’s not going to be “on-call” for every
single time you stub your toe, then it’ll be a lot less likely for
him to compare a life with you to being trapped in a cage.
Showing him that you’re independent will let him be completely
free to decide about committing to you with full flexibility.
“Honey, I promise that every single day will begin and end with
the sounds of my complaints echoing through the halls! I will
not allow the sun to rise and set without crying at least once,
and that is a promise. I hope you were in the debate club,
because I will ALWAYS find a reason to argue, and I will never
lose once! You’d better proofread your text, because I’m seeing
them all!”
Now I want you to read those words above and let me know if it
sounds like the kind of thing that would make a man want to
commit. Do you think men fantasize about being legally,
financially and emotionally hog-tied to the most negative
female specimen in their hemisphere?
I’d bet that you don’t really believe your man would be seduced
by an offer like that! If you’re human, then you can probably
agree with the fact that constant negativity actually isn’t the
sexiest thing in the entire world.
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horrified by the idea of marrying you, then it would help make
an effort not to have more uplifting conversations with him than
bitter conversations!
You can have the man overcome his fears and see the bright
side to committing with my “Soulmate Mishmash” Lines!
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Soulmate Mishmash Lines are completely honest, heart-to-heart
messages you can relay to your man in order to assure that the
most common fears that men have about potentially being with
a woman for the rest of their lives!
For example...
Now do you see what’s going on in this passage? It’s made very
clear here that not only do you respect his personal time, but
you actually worry about the fact that he might start feeling
claustrophobic. Many women out there are just too nervous
about mentioning worries like this, but if you do it calmly and
honestly, it will definitely be for the better in the long run!
If you want your man to really see that you’re not about the
ball-and-chain relationship model, then openly mocking the idea
will show that you know the value of being an arm’s distance
away from each other at least once a week. Another advantage
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of this line is that it’s a way to show you’re willing to give
distance without sounding like you don’t want to commit at all!
Remember, while you don’t want the man to feel like he’s going
to lose all of his freedom by committing to you, you still at least
want him to know that the idea of spending a life with him
something that you actually want to happen.
This line will alleviate the man’s fear that being with you could
potentially remove his sense of identity!
If you show that you don’t support the way some of your
friends can’t stop being obsessed about their men, it will show
him that you’re not going to let anyone you talk to convince you
to be clingy!
Telling the man something like this will show him that taking
things to the next level won’t make things any more demanding
than they already are!
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“Don’t you feel kind of bad for those couples who just
can’t function without each other for a single second?”
This line will let the man know that getting committed to you
won’t mean that he has to sacrifice any of his taste for going
out an having new experiences!
This line also shows your man that he won’t have to stop having
fun, but in addition to that, it will also show him that you’re
interested in having a life of your own while being committed.
All of these Soulmate Mishmash lines will show your man that
you’re definitely interested enough in him to be committed to
him, but not in a demanding or needy way; as a matter of fact,
he’ll see that you want him to still have freedom!
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Section 14 - Blind Sweetheart Lines
And then the tires screech. You hit a little bump in the
relationship that knocks things off course without warning, or
maybe the chemistry just runs out of fuel - whatever the case
is, your guy is just no longer your guy anymore!
How did it happen? The ways it can happen are endless, and to
sweeten the deal, it can happen no matter how well you think
you know the guy. You think you’ve got his feelings figured out
even more thoroughly than you know your first language
alphabet, then it turns out that you had the alphabet backwards
all along.
Well even if the future that you visualized with the guy turns
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out not be as much of a sure shot as you initially imagined,
that’s not a sign that you should just give up on the future
altogether! If there’s anything that you should take from this
section, it’s that your life should be lived, no matter whether or
not another guy wants to be around for it.
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start understanding the most crucial things that there are to
know about men when you get into a situation like this.
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die down, a lot of women can’t believe that it didn’t last forever.
Even if you’re not married to a guy, EVERY relationship that we
have (or step up to the next level), has a “honeymoon period”.
When the honeymoon period is over, you’ve got to be ready for
the effects!
When the subtle changes have already taken place, it’s very
easy for a lot of women to get taken off-guard and wonder just
what the hell happened all of a sudden. What I’m going to teach
you here is a way to avoid being caught off-guard when that
honeymoon period finally expires.
At the very least, you won’t go into one of those terrible three
“modes” that I mentioned before! As a matter of fact, with the
use of this technique that I’ve prepared to discuss in this
section, you will be the opposite of a woman who is desperate
to please her man after he’s expressed disinterest and made
distance.
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Sweetheart line does is present the value you offer as
something that is always changing, developing, and turning into
something new.
Here’s the precedent: live life to the fullest, and live life, for
you, before that relationship even comes to play in the first
place! Think of all of the amazing new thrills, adventures and
experiences that you can have in your life, with or without a
man at your side. Not only does this make you happier in
general, but it makes the relationship more solid.
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Try and fathom this for a moment: somehow, some way, you
just lose the ability to watch an amazing program. The show is
virtually canceled for you, but everyone else is the world has
the ability to enjoy it at their leisure. Even if it doesn’t get to
you immediately, after awhile, you’re definitely going to start
thinking that it’s unfair.
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How long can you expect a man, or anyone at all, to voluntarily
stay in solitary confinement? I can guarantee you that the time
that they will voluntarily choose to stay will be much, much
shorter than the idea of “forever” that a lot of my clients had
when the relationship first started.
Now naturally, I’m not trying to say that you should feel
ashamed if it’s happened to you! A world without any mistakes
would be a place where learning wasn’t even a factor, because
there would be no such thing as doing things ‘”right” or
“wrong”.
Now fast forward to a little bit of time after the distance has
already been established, and think about what you’ve been
doing since then. Remember what I said about leading a
fulfilling life regardless of your relationship status?
Well right here and now, however long it’s been since you came
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to the conclusion that your man was definitely packing things
up in his mind, I want you to just start writing down a list of all
of the different ways that you can be the best possible you.
What moves can you make in order to get closer to the best
version of yourself there is?
Whatever the case is, if you can see to it that you put forth
whatever energy you need to in order to bring those things
closer to a reality, start earnestly working in that direction.
Start aspiring to reach the point at which you can honestly get
in contact with your man and have something to show for the
time that you’ve spent apart.
Now once you’ve reached the point where you’re feeling good
enough to say that you’ve made progress, you are in the prime
position to start making the best use of my Blind Sweetheart
Lines below. Understand that the goal isn’t to make what you
done an attempt purely to impress the man, but things that you
legitimately wanted.
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sure that you don’t come off as if you’re trying too hard to
make it seem like you need to impress him. When it comes to
using these lines in the right way, to be honest, less is actually
more! Be honest about what the time apart has meant you, and
the effects will be what they need to be.
When you show that you’re appreciative of the time that you
spent apart, and you do it in a way that isn’t even bitter, he
may not even know how to respond. I had a client who gave a
line like the above example to her guy through text, and he
wouldn’t stop trying to get her to reply to him again for two
months!
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sure that it’s the same for you. Let’s catch up when we
both have time.”
The catch with this line is that it actually puts pressure on the
guy to be able to say how things have been going equally good,
if not even better for him since the break. No matter how he
actually responds to this, you can be sure that this is going to
make him a little self-conscious about how his life has been
since things between you two ended.
When you say that you’re down to catch up with him when
there’s a ‘free moment’ for the two of you to get back in touch,
you give him the impression that your time is valuable and you
have a packed schedule. Naturally he’s going to be thinking
about how to reply, but he won’t know whether or not you have
the time to reply back!
“Honey I really care about you, but lately, I’m not sure if
us being together was a good or bad idea. I think in the
long run it was a good idea for us take a break and
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improve our lives. I’ve made some great moves and I’d
like to let you know all about it someday. I’ll keep in
touch.”
Now when you say things like “someday” and “keep in touch”,
the general ambiguity of it all is going to make him have mixed
feelings about just when you plan on getting back to him.
You’re clearly expressing a non-confrontational desire to
maintain contact with him, which is already disarming, but not
knowing when will force him to start thinking hard.
With the nature of these lines, you basically assert your power
while disarming any ability he would have to be feel validated or
retaliate - there just won’t be anything for him to retaliate
against in the first place! If he does get defensive or upset
about this, then it’s basically confirmation that he’s operating
within your frame.
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that intrigues him, then he might start thinking about what he
might be able to do in order to try things with you again.
Whatever the case may be, make an effort to actually lead a life
that’s fulfilling enough for you to be okay no matter what the
result is. Actually leading an awesome life and not needing a
man to be happy is a virtue for all of us ladies, not matter
whether we’re single ladies or dealing with the aftermath of a
breakup!
When you tell him that you’re actually thankful for the chance
to split and think it over, though, it’s kind of going to mess with
his head! In a way you are making an effort to patch things up,
but at the same time, it’s not going to be in a way that most
guys are actually prepared for. You’ll keep your dignity and
create additional value!
What you can really take away from the philosophy of these
lines, and the section in general, is the art of using single life as
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a period of empowerment. The greatest thing to take away is
that being on your own doesn’t mean that you have to be lonely
- this leads to a better chance of being happily committed in the
future!
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Conclusion
If you take anything from what we’ve covered over the course
of these sections, it’s that the most powerful kind of relationship
you can have is the kind that you have with the things that go
unseen.
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the top 1% of all women who can attract a high-value man and
keep him around for a lifetime.
After the relationship has begun, you know that your next
primary objective should be to focus all of your powers on
spinning that almighty circle of attraction. When you spin the
circle of attraction, every single thing you do will set of a chain
reaction of self-sustaining passion that keeps the man attracted
to you indefinitely.
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These lessons aren’t meant to make you think that you can just
read the future when it comes any man that you deal with, but
it’s just a way of seeing to it that you’re always prepared for
what some of the most challenging relationship situations can
be like when they arise.
More than anything, the most important thing that you can do
here is make sure that you keep things sweet. In the section
that I mention Sweet Like Honeybunch Lines, I cannot stress
how much MORE effective all of these techniques really are if
you’re able to pull them off while being completely cordial and
complimentary as you do!
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If you appeal to the man’s need to feel like he has to be a
suitable mate, then whether he’s a stranger or you’ve already
know him for several years on end, the ultimate result is going
to the same every time! He’s going to feel a tug in his mind on
a level that isn’t normally reached, and though what you said
was sweet, the force is going to feel strong and aggressive to
him!
After you’ve gotten this down to the type of science where you
can do all of these intuitively, then you will always be able to
set off a fire in the man’s belly without even trying! The fire in
the belly in the man’s urge to hunt, be validated, and feel
powerful.
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plays every time.
If you’re like my friend Kylie, and just about every other red-
blooded woman in the world, you want to be loved by the man
you love- that’s not a desire that you ever need to jump
through a bunch of hoops to make happen! All that it takes is
some awareness of the fact that it t preserving the love takes
little bit more work than just wanting it to happen.
Remember the story that I told about that guy who I thought
was in a relationship with, who turned out to not actually share
my perspective on that arrangement? That story still makes me
cringe sometimes, but if it weren’t for little setbacks like that, I
wouldn’t be able to tell you all about how I was able to learn
from it and develop into a relationship coach today.
If you can see all of the mistakes that you’ve ever made with a
guy as a sign of how to do things a little bit better the next
time, then you’ll be in perfect shape to keep on advancing your
relationship knowledge instead of always being at a loss for how
to get over the last one that didn’t work out.
Out of situations like the ones that I had with guys like Joseph,
I discovered the sublime power Lovetraction Lines. With all of
the techniques that you can work on taking to here, you’ll
always be able to keep a firm handle on the emotional
temperature between you and guy that determines how much
pressure he feels.
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pour cold water on himself to feel relief from. If you can create
the right kind of emotional temperature between you and your
man at the right time, you will have what it takes to makes sure
that a man feels it even when you aren’t even around him.
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and because of that, the man won’t ever be able to help be
recognize an alpha female when he sees one. His primal
protector is going to go haywire, and once that happens, it’s
pretty much game over! He’s going to feel the pressure to
either step up to the plate or accept that he just wasn’t up to
snuff.
With the Sensation Grand Slam Line, you basically give your
man a bittersweet double-whammy that contains both the
amazing feeling acceptance and that crushing emptiness from
being pushed away - okay, it may not really be quite that
dramatic, but you still get the kind of effect that makes your
man unsure of the best way to react!
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This is what I mean when I say that you can’t just stop trying to
create some positive discomfort in your man when he starts to
show you that he has legitimate feelings of affection towards
you. Getting the man to feel some serious attraction towards
you is simply getting a clean hit, but when you mix it in with
some rejection-flavored tension, it’s a grand slam!
It might seem just a little bit devious at first glance, but when
you consider the fact that the primal protector needs to feel
validated in order to stay healthy, you’ll understand that what
you’re doing is actually one of the most healthy ways that you
can keep a man invested in your relationship in the long run.
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You can truly inspire a man to do anything once you have the
kind of emotional leverage over him that makes him feel that
temperature even when he’s separated from you, but be careful
about it! Seeing as a man could legitimately (and HAS, in the
case of one of Lance Taylor’s clients) actually break his bank to
please his queen, caution and mercy are values!
Now once you’ve developed the kind of power that can make
you the queen of his heart, you’ll have the follow steps down to
a complete science:
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When a man sees you as a one-night stand and nothing more,
he’s only going to see pleasing you as a side-effect of a goal to
please himself and NOTHING more than that! With the use of
verbal techniques like Emotion Devotion lines, however, he goes
from a state of only wanting self-satisfaction to a state where
he WANTS to make you feel as good as possible.
A man who sleeps with you, just to sleep with you, doesn’t
necessarily have his primary protector activated. When you’ve
said things that psychologically force him to associate the act of
sleeping with you with the concept of being emotionally
connected to you, he won’t possibly be able to deny that
connection when he thinks about you in a physical way!
The key to making these things work is to always keep your eye
on the prize no matter how discouraging it seems when the
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man is initially resistant to showing any serious signs of
intimacy. When your man is looking like he’s disinterested, you
know that he’s probably feeling hangups about the social
expectations that pressure him to ignore his deeper emotions.
Instead of trying to make the man feel like he HAS to spill all of
his emotional contents to you like an overturned cup, you know
at this pint that the best way to go about it is to just make the
prospect of getting to know you an attractive one!
You know now that it’s better idea to present the pain that your
man may be feeling as a hypothetical matter than something
you’re just going to claim exists already! Though you may have
a good feeling that there is something wrong, he’ll appreciate it
the most if you don’t take it upon yourself to directly tell him
that you know everything happening under the hood!
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If you forget your own dignity when the relationship is going
south, or gone, then you risk falling into one of those three
“modes” that I mentioned in the tenth section:
Fortunately, you now know that the best way to avoid falling
into these states is to make sure that you don’t ever forget the
importance of sweetness. Sweet doesn’t mean that you need to
go overboard and fake niceness, but it means that you always
remember that you catch more bees with honey than salt.
Once you’ve shown your man that not even his distance can
upset your balance, it will take away his “bullet-proof” feeling of
always having your attachment as a guaranteed thing. All of the
verbal techniques that we’re using here are simply different
ways that we can quietly, subconsciously, POWERFULLY alter a
man’s impression with minimal effort.
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Without him even knowing what’s happening, we’re getting
under his skin in a way that’s actually good for him. His
conscious brain may not know exactly what’s happening, but his
subconscious brain is going to be eating it all up and loving
every second of it.
The key with the Hanky Panky lines is to keep things saucy,
ensuring that the emotional aspect has some serious firepower
ahead of it to drill right down into the reward center of his
mind. Bringing some memories that the two of you share into
the mix will make it so that he always thinks about the things
you say with deeper immersion into his senses!
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At this point, however, what I’ve taught you will ensure that you
know the best way to keep a man around after you’ve gotten
him into your frame. Once you’ve got his devotion to you at a
high enough degree, the next step is to make sure that you
lower the anxiety he might feel in another area- his freedom.
Letting the man know that you’re definitely not looking to stand
in the way of his ability to live his life, even when he has made
an effort to devote himself to you, will be like supercharging the
attraction that he already felt before you even said anything.
When you let the man know that you feel he is still entitled to
his own life, and you to yours, will keep him from feeling his
own attraction dwindle out of fear of the fact that he’s getting
too committed. I can’t tell you how many clients I’ve had who
did every step right except for this one, which made their
devoted men float away at the worst possible moment!
The cherry on top of it all that you have the power already, and
you all you have to do is let it manifest in the right way! Love
yourself as the apex of female evolution up until your birth,
born with all of the tools to drive men wild, and enjoy going
through life like royalty! Love is war, and now you have the
weapons to assure victory! Now go and conquer your kingdom!
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