You know you're from Mendham if...

1. You know what a half and half is and you love them.
2. You go to Kings at any minute of any day there will be at least one or two people you know,
most likely parents of kids you went to grammar school with and you are forced to say hello.
3. You know that the bakery has amazing black and white cookies.
4. You know where Burrini's used to be.
5. You know that you can get not only medicine at the Apothecary but also lots of candy and
poster board.
6. You know what time Village Video closes on Friday and Saturday nights.
7. You know that there's nothing better then a Taylor ham, Egg and Cheese from Wicker.
8. You know no one really goes to Robinsons.
9. When you were in 6th grade you either chilled or wanted to chill in the Kings parking lot
especially near the bulletin board.
10. You think that Jockey Hollow is scary as shit at night.
11. You know that Cluck U is a staple late night snack.
12. You know Starbucks is only 15 minutes away yet, no one wants to drive there.
13. You know that the two lights in town are identified as, the one near kings and the one
near the black horse.
14. You know that the Pub is really only for out-of-towners.
15. You know that Chester is a dirty, dirty place but very necessary.
16. You have never been in the Laundry Mat.
17. You remember when Haagen-Dagz used to be in Kings shopping center.
18. You had a birthday party or went to one at Pastime Lane's when you were little.
19. You know that Sammy's is clearly mob, and your dad goes there once in awhile to meet
his business friends for drinks.
20. You played soccer and had team names like "blue" and "maroon", and one of your best
friends dads was probably the coach.
21. You can probably still name everyone in your 5th grade class.
22. You've never really been to MacKenzie's, more or less, because you always forget its
there.
23. There have been many times where you just get in your car, pick up a friend and drive
around Chester and Mendham smoking cigarettes for hours.
24. You miss Emack's.
25. The Labor Day Fair is where it's at for many, many years until you have the desire to get
all drunk and then go watch all of your friends little brothers and sisters stand in circles and
talk.
26. You know that the high school causes unreal amounts of traffic on 24 in the AM.
27. You know how to get to every single one of your friends houses but have no clue what the
names of the roads are.
28. You know that you need to get to 287 to get to anywhere legitimate in NJ.
29. You know the shore is only an hour plus away.
30. You know at least 5 other people from all of the adjacent towns; as in Basking Ridge, Long
Valley and Morristown.
31. Every kid gets a brand new SUV or VW for their 17 birthday.
32. You know it's very acceptable to wear J. Crew flip flops all through winter.
33. You know Mendham High is like a fashion show.
34. Everyone will either apply to BC, Villanova or U. of Maryland.
35. You know Drakewick is the place to be on Halloween even if your from the Boro or
Chester.
36. You know Whitney Houston and Bobby Brown are the ultimate trash of the town.
37. You know that the Audi dealership used to be an old auto shop and it burnt down.
38. You know Oak Knoll is kinda just there, you don't really know of anyone that lives there.
39. When a Mendhamite is explaining the placement of the Boro and the Township sections of
town they refer to Mendham as being a donut or a horseshoe.
40. In every class there is at least one or two set of parents that are chill that let you booze it
up at their house and sleep over.
41. When leaving a Dave concert at MSG (where you will see more then half the town and
daddy got us the tickets of course) you need to be ready to go down the escalators when they
call the Morristown train because its gonna be packed.
42. Every mom loves Talbot's and Ann Taylor and they love to talk about re-doing their
kitchens.
43. Every dad has season tickets to the Giants and Jets games.
44. Most of our dad's barely have a legitimate college education but they seem to make shit
loads of money some how.
45. You know at least 80% of the Mendham kids have tried weed and about 50% of them do it
socially, and about 10% do it every single day and everyone knows who they are.
46. You know Gill St. Bernard's is a small ass co-ed high school that no one really knows
about.
47. You know Dispatch goes to Pingry every year.
48. You've heard of Guster and Granian.
49. You know that Delbarton dances are all talk, and no one really goes except the Kent Place
ho's, the St. Easy's chicks, and the Villa Gorillas.
50. When your really young during the summer you go to the Mendham Boro Day camp then
you move up to the "All Sports Camp" at the Racquet Ball Club.
51. You were a member of the Racquet Ball club until you or one of your friends got a pool.
52. You know Mendham HS Boys and Girls Basketball has been unreal in the past but the girls
are getting a little shaky.
53. Everyone owns New Balances, Birkenstocks, and a North Face; and every girl owns at
least one Coach bag and most likely uses a Vera Bradley for a sleepover bag.
54. You know that Clueless is a reality and it will never get old.
55. You know that you can never get bad take out from Dante's.
56. You know people who have worked at China Gourmet and tell you not to eat it.
57. You know Wendy's is way better then Burger King.
58. You know that The Chester Diner is acceptable sometimes but if you go late at night your
gonna get all the weirdo's from all of the local high schools including CENTRAL.
59. No one understands why all of our grandparents like the Turkey Farm.
60. You know what a Sub-Zero is and you most likely have one.
61. Your mom either only cooks dinner twice a week or cooks a gourmet meal every night in
her gourmet kitchen.
62. You are not intimidated when you walk into Wicker, you don't even have to think twice
about what your ordering, and you know how the line works.
63. You remember when "Dan the Van Man" used to sit at the municipal building.
64. You have done illegal things at Boro Park.
65. You know that driving around picking random people up is a nightly adventure.
66. You have hit a deer and not cared.
67. If you go to college and come back, it's the same as how you left it.
68. You know that Redwoods is the only good restaurant in Chester.
69. You can get to the Rockaway Mall, the Short Hills mall or the Bridgewater Mall in under 30
minutes.
70. Wearing Tiffany has now become as regular as wearing socks.
71. Your Mom doesn't work and spends most of her time at the mall and out to lunch with "the
ladies".
72. You know your neighbors number and know that they would help you out whenever you
needed it.
73. You know there's as much diversity as there is in a milk shelf at the supermarket.
74. You grew up with the girls and boys across the street and know that you will be in contact
with them forever.
75. You know at least one person in the fire department or on the EMT squad.
76. If your driving on 24 at around 10:30-11:30 PM, you will be able to identify every single
car that passes and who's in it, who's it is and where they are going and coming from.
77. Even your Mom likes going to Wicker before and after school.
78. Your Mom goes to Kings every day to "get something for dinner" and often times asks you
what you want before leaving.
79. Sorrento's must be only for Boro people and out-of-towners.
80. You see nothing wrong with naming a video store Village Video, and a pizza place Village
Pizza.
81. You know that Central sucks and Long Valley people are weird.
82. You hated riding the bus and rarely did.
83. You think Morristown's a little ghetto and lock the car doors when entering it.
84. You know that there are five banks in Mendham, and you understand why.
85. You know that bad events happen in sets of three.
86. You have volunteered and/or played Bingo at Holly Manor.
87. You've heard 30 different stories on how Mendham got its name, but upon being asked
you couldn't tell one.
88. You know there's gonna a cop waiting for you at the bottom of Ralston Hill and if it's past
midnight there's a good chance he'll follow you home.
89. We don't know the difference between the two Chester shopping malls.
90. You know that there's a hermitage in Chester and you've driven up there at night to get
freaked out.
91. You were shocked and appalled when you heard there was a murder in Chester related to
two Spanish speaking street gangs.
92. By the second day of your freshman year you know where the senior bench/section is in
the high school and you know not to sit there.
93. You know what Bantam's used to be.
94. Colonial Pantry is impossible to park at and you don't really know why it exists.
95. If you’re at a party and someone doesn't have a cell phone, you know they must be from
Long Valley.
96. You know that The Common's gate guard is always "on patrol" but when he's in the booth
your very sketched out.
97. There's always that one group of girls that are always up in Delbarton's junk.
98. If there is a forecast of flurries your wondering if school will be closed the next day.
99. At Christmas time your Mom decks out in her Santa sweaters for the 25 days leading up to
Christmas and that she puts at least 40 Christmas figures around the house.
100.You know that Mendham will always be a classy town and at the end of the day you want
to raise your kids here too.