L augh-Ou t-L oud

Joke s f or K id s

Rob Elliot t

Rob Elliott,
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids,
Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group, © 2010. Used by permission.

_Jokes_LS_djm.indd 3 4/14/10 9:39:2

 © 2010 by Robert E. Teigen

Published by Revell
a division of Baker Publishing Group
P.O. Box 6287, Grand Rapids, MI 49516-6287
www.revellbooks.com

ISBN 978-0-8007-8803-2

Printed in the United States of America

All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a re-
trieval system, or transmitted in any form or by any means—for example, electronic,
photocopy, recording—without the prior written permission of the publisher. The
only exception is brief quotations in printed reviews.

10  11  12  13  14  15  16    7  6  5  4  3  2  1

Rob Elliott,
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids,
Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group, © 2010. Used by permission.

_Jokes_LS_djm.indd 4 4/14/10 9:39:2

 Con t en t s

1
Q & A Jokes    9

2
Awesome Animal Jokes    51

3
Knock Knock Jokes    83

4
Tongue Twisters    121

5
Some Things to Think About   125

7
Rob Elliott,
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids,
Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group, © 2010. Used by permission.

_Jokes_LS_djm.indd 7 4/14/10 9:39:2

 1
Q & A Joke s

Q: Why did the robber wash his clothes before he

ran away with the loot?
A: He wanted to make a clean getaway.

Q: How does a skeleton call his friends?

A: On the tele-bone.

Q: What is the richest kind of air?

A: A millionaire.

9
Rob Elliott,
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids,
Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group, © 2010. Used by permission.

_Jokes_LS_djm.indd 9 4/14/10 9:39:2

  L a u g h - O u t - L o u d J o k e s f o r K i d s

Q: Who keeps the ocean clean?

A: The mermaid.

Q: Why did the invisible man turn down a job

offer?
A: He just couldn’t see himself doing it.

Q: Why did the skeleton drink eight glasses of

milk every day?
A: Milk is good for the bones.

Q: Why did Johnny jump up and down before he

drank his juice?
A: The carton said to “shake well before drinking.”

Q: What is a baby’s favorite reptile?

A: A rattlesnake.

10
Rob Elliott,
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids,
Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group, © 2010. Used by permission.

_Jokes_LS_djm.indd 10 4/14/10 9:39:2

 2
Aw e s ome A nimal Joke s

Q: A cowboy arrives at the ranch on a Sunday,

stays three days, and leaves on Friday. How is
that possible?
A: The horse’s name is Friday.

Q: What do you call a bear standing in the rain?

A: A drizzly bear.

51
Rob Elliott,
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids,
Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group, © 2010. Used by permission.

_Jokes_LS_djm.indd 51 4/14/10 9:39:3

  L a u g h - O u t - L o u d J o k e s f o r K i d s

Q: What happened when the spider got a new

car?
A: It took it for a spin.

A duck walks into a store and asks the manager if he

sells grapes. The manager says no, so the duck leaves.
The next day the duck goes back to the store and
asks the manager if he sells grapes. The manager says,
“NO, we don’t sell grapes,” so the duck leaves the
store. The next day the duck goes back to the same
store and asks the manager if he sells grapes. The
manager is furious now and says, “NO, WE DO NOT
SELL GRAPES! IF YOU COME BACK AND ASK
IF WE SELL GRAPES AGAIN, I’LL NAIL YOUR
BEAK TO THE FLOOR!” The next day the duck
goes back to the same store and says to the manager,
“Excuse me, do you sell nails at this store?” The man-
ager says, “No, we don’t sell nails.” The duck replies,
“That’s good. Do you sell grapes?”

Q: What do you get from a pampered cow?

A: Spoiled milk.

52
Rob Elliott,
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids,
Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group, © 2010. Used by permission.

_Jokes_LS_djm.indd 52 4/14/10 9:39:3

 3
K nock K nock Joke s

Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Butter.
Butter who?
I butter not tell you—it’s a secret.

Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Wendy.
Wendy who?
Wendy you think we’ll be done with these knock
knock jokes?

83
Rob Elliott,
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids,
Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group, © 2010. Used by permission.

_Jokes_LS_djm.indd 83 4/14/10 9:39:4

  L a u g h - O u t - L o u d J o k e s f o r K i d s

Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Hailey.
Hailey who?
Hailey a cab so I can go home.

Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Wayne.
Wayne who?
The Wayne is really coming down, so open the
door!

Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Weasel.
Weasel who?
Weasel be late if you don’t hurry up.

84
Rob Elliott,
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids,
Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group, © 2010. Used by permission.

_Jokes_LS_djm.indd 84 4/14/10 9:39:4

 4
T ongue T w is t er s

Try to Say These Ten Times Fast

Giggly gladiator.

Fresh French fries.

Selfish shellfish.

121
Rob Elliott,
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids,
Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group, © 2010. Used by permission.

_Jokes_LS_djm.indd 121 4/14/10 9:39:5

  L a u g h - O u t - L o u d J o k e s f o r K i d s

Sock, skirt, shirt.

Snatch stacked snacks.

Cheap cheese stinks.

Goofy gorillas gobble grapefruits.

Tall trees toss leaves.

Purple penguins pick pickles.

Cooked cookies crumble quickly.

Soggy stuff smells suspicious.

122
Rob Elliott,
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids,
Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group, © 2010. Used by permission.

_Jokes_LS_djm.indd 122 4/14/10 9:39:5

 5
S ome T hing s
t o T hink A bou t

What do you call a male ladybug?

Why don’t they call moustaches mouthbrows?

Why doesn’t glue stick to the inside of the bottle?

125
Rob Elliott,
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids,
Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group, © 2010. Used by permission.

_Jokes_LS_djm.indd 125 4/14/10 9:39:5

  L a u g h - O u t - L o u d J o k e s f o r K i d s

What do they call their good plates in China?

Why is a boxing ring square?

If a fly didn’t have wings, would we call it a walk?

Do fish ever get thirsty?

126
Rob Elliott,
Laugh-Out-Loud Jokes for Kids,
Revell Books, a division of Baker Publishing Group, © 2010. Used by permission.

_Jokes_LS_djm.indd 126 4/14/10 9:39:5