How to Manage Conflict

by Gill Corkindale

Last November, Philippe, a 33-year-old French banker, left Paris for a new challenge in
London. He thought that a new job in a fast-growing British investment bank would give
him valuable international experience and develop some new skills. The bigger salary and
bonus were also a draw.

One year on, Philippe has a different view of his move. When I met him last week, he
explained that the year had been a disaster and his job was in danger as staff had made
formal complaints about his management style. He had found it difficult to adjust to his
new role, but he had not realised that his style had created such conflict within his team.

Philippe felt he had been acting appropriately, but his colleagues and team members felt
he had been inconsistent, favouring some members of his team and undermining others.
His line manager had recommended coaching to help him improve his communication
skills, understand the culture and develop his people skills. Philippe had agreed to the
coaching but felt aggrieved that the bank had not done more to prepare him for his role
with training and a proper induction. The main problem, he said, was the bank’s matrix
structure and its focus on profit-making, which encouraged managers to fight for territory
and resources rather than building teams and developing people. In short, the bank
deliberately created a culture of conflict rather than collaboration.

Of course, both sides have a point. Philippe needs to change, but so does the environment
in which he is operating. I am often asked to work with individuals in a conflict situation,
but rarely does the organisation ask for feedback on why the conflict occurred and what
they might do to prevent it. In truth, little is done at the organisational level to mitigate
conflict.
Organisational conflict is emerging as a key workplace issue among the people I coach.
They tell me that there is a lack of will and/or skills to deal with conflict and have many
theories as to why it occurs and what happens when it takes root. From being an
unwelcome distraction, conflict in a team or department can quickly spread, to damage
relationships, lower productivity and morale and in extreme cases lead absenteeism,
sabotage, litigation and even strikes.

So why are so many people experiencing conflict at work? There are two key factors.

First, the matrix structure adopted by many organisations has resulted in unclear
reporting lines, increased competition for resources and attention and general confusion
as managers try to develop an appropriate management style.

Second, globalisation has caused change and restructuring so that businesses operate
more flexibly. There has been a rapid growth in virtual teams, with people from different
backgrounds and cultures working across vast regions and time zones. Email and
electronic communication are the most practical ways to connect, but these can be
anonymous and lead to misunderstanding.

In addition to matrix management styles and globalisation, there are a number of other
sources of conflict, including:

 Different cultures and assumptions

 Differing values, opinions and beliefs
 Lack of sensitivity to race, gender, age, class, education and ability
 Poor people skills, especially communication
 Volatile, fast-changing workplaces
 Limits on resources, physical and psychological
So what are the ways to manage conflict? How can managers ensure that it does not
escalate out of control? According to the Thomas-Kilmann Conflict Instrument, there are
five key styles for managing conflict:

 Forcing — using your formal authority or power to satisfy your concerns without
regard to the other party’s concerns
 Accommodating — allowing the other party to satisfy their concerns while
neglecting your own
 Avoiding — not paying attention to the conflict and not taking any action to resolve
it
 Compromising — attempting to resolve the conflict by identifying a solution that is
partially satisfactory to both parties but completely satisfactory to neither
 Collaborating — co-operating with the other party to understand their concerns in
an effort to find a mutually satisfying solution

Another way to look at conflict is to decide the relative importance of the issue and to
consider the extent to which priorities, principles, relationships or values are at stake.
Power is also an important issue – how much power do you have relative to the other
person?

As a rule, I would suggest collaboration is the way to deal with important issues, although
forcing can sometimes be appropriate if time is an issue. For moderately important issues,
compromising can lead to quick solutions but it doesn’t satisfy either side, nor does it
foster innovation, so collaboration is probably better. Accommodating is the best
approach for unimportant issues as it leads to quick resolution without straining the
relationship.

And lest we forget, conflict does have a positive side: it can promote collaboration,
improve performance, foster creativity and innovation and build deeper relationships. As
Jim Collins wrote in Good to Great, “all the good-to-great companies had a penchant for
intense dialogue. Phrases like ‘loud debate’, ‘heated discussions’ and ‘healthy conflict’
peppered the articles and transcripts from all companies.” The more skilled managers
become in handling differences and change without creating or getting involved in
conflict, the more successful their teams and companies will become.

Are you caught in a conflict at work? What are the roots of that conflict? Do you feel that
you, your manager or your colleagues are dealing with it effectively? If not, what are your
suggestions?
How To Manage Conflict

Kristi Hedges

If you’re a leader, you deal with conflict. It’s inevitable. Effectively managing conflict is
imperative to generating trust and maintaining confidence. Leaders who avoid conflict,
mishandle it, or stoke it find it very difficult to sustain followership.

We expect our leaders to be innately adept at managing conflict. But before people
become leaders, they already have a natural tendency for how they will address conflict.
This tendency is usually unconsciously carried into the leadership role. Thomas-
Kilmann’s Conflict Mode Instrument (TKI) provides a helpful guide for identifying what
our conflict predispositions might be. The TKI breaks down our conflict styles
into five distinct types:

1. Competing: In a conflict, this individual is assertive and uncooperative

and will pursue his or her own concerns at the other person’s expense. He
will use his power to win the argument, even if it’s for the sake of winning
(and he’s wrong).
2. Accommodating: This individual is unassertive and cooperative, i.e., the
opposite of the competing type. This person will sacrifice his own concerns
for those of the other person.
3. Avoiding: This is the person who does not want to deal with the conflict
(he’s neither assertive nor cooperative). He sidesteps, postpones and
withdraws.
 4. Collaborating: A collaborator is the opposite of an avoider. He actively
works to work out a solution that makes everyone happy.
5. Compromising: This individual is moderately assertive and cooperative.
He will address the issue directly, but he may not spend as much time
digging into the root of the problem as a collaborator. He will seek the
middle ground in a disagreement.

While we all have a style we favor, we’re capable of using all of these styles. In fact,
leadership requires us to be adept at each. To be the best resolvers of conflicts, we need
to learn to flex to the situation – and not be swayed by our default style.

While we may never enjoy conflict, we can get better – and more strategic – at handling
it. To be more agile at how you manage conflict, consider these suggestions:

Establish clear procedures for dealing with conflict.

Jeanne Brett, the DeWitt W. Buchanan, Jr. Distinguished Professor of Dispute

Resolution and Organizations at Kellogg Graduate School of Management, says that we
should have “solid conflict management procedures in place to deal with [conflicts]
when they arise, because they will arise.” In other words, do your conflict prep work.
Come up with a step-by-step plan for how to face disagreements head on before they
happen. Then, when a conflict arises, you can anchor everyone back to that process to
find resolution.

Intervene early.

It’s easier to solve a small issue than a big problem. While it may be tempting to put off
confronting those involved to see if the issue works itself out, don’t let the problem drag
on. Get to the issue when people are still thinking rationally. “Difficult interpersonal
workplace problems won’t disappear by ignoring them; they’ll only get
worse,” says Forbes contributor, Victor Lipman. “Chronic conflict-avoiders will end up
losing the respect of their employees – and their own management.”

Know the priorities in the conflict.

In order to determine which conflict style will be most effective in the given situation,
ask yourself what is the most important priority in the conflict? Is it your team or the
company? Your goals or the relationship between parties?

For example, if the relationship matters the most, you will want to break out your
collaborative or accommodating styles. If the result is paramount, you may need to use a
competing style. Figure out what you want to preserve, so you know how to tackle the
situation.

Focus on the problem, not the people.

Pointing fingers isn’t going to solve the problem. Instead, according to the American
Management Association, focus on the larger issue at hand: “The source of the conflict
might be a minor problem that occurred months before, but the level of stress has grown
to the point where the two parties have begun attacking each other personally instead of
addressing the real problem. In the calm of your office, you can get them to look beyond
the triggering incident to see the real cause.”

When you start to hear the conversation focus on the people, bring everyone back to
discussing the problem.

Remind everyone of the common ground.

In Harvard Business Review, Amy Gallo says that once a conflict arises, the best
approach is to remind the team of prior agreements. In other words, focus on where you
all are on the same page. When team members are reminded that they are part of the
larger team with shared goals, it will give them more motivation to resolve the issue and
move forward.

Foster a community of open communication.

According to the 2014 Workfront State of Enterprise Work Report, miscommunication

was one of the main causes of conflict in the office, which led to lost productivity and
high turnover. Further, 1 in 5 employees found that company leadership was the group
with whom they experienced the most conflict.

To knock down barriers to communication, foster an open-door policy (or open email
policy), so employees can come to you with issues before they fester. Make it easy for
people to voice their concerns, so frustration doesn’t lead to disengagement or worse,
hostility. In the absence of communication, rumor thrives. Remind people that when
they hear a rumor or even have an assumption, to check it out. This greatly helps to
avoid many conflicts in the first place.

Kristi Hedges is a leadership coach, speaker and author of The Power of Presence:
Unlock Your Potential to Influence and Engage Others