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“They made my skin crawl; you are the only one I ever wanted. Before you came back, I was glad you
hadn’t let me marry Donald” I felt my cheeks becoming warm and wet. I had not notice at first but I
know I started to cry.

“I realized almost as soon as you left me that I would have been miserable with him—without you” it
stings my heart. I can’t picture it out having to not hold her; It would have been miserable too. Every
single time thinking about her would only cause agony and pain and . . . regret.

“Do you mean that” I say and it came out like a whisper, like I’ve left my voice somewhere.

Before she could ever speak, she wipes my tears with her palm and smile lovingly at me “I swear it with
all my heart darling. I only wanted you and I still want you”

Now I’m crying. Like tears-snot-and-drool kind of crying and it makes me feel more miserable that I
could ever imagine (kidding). How wonderful it is to be loved by someone so pure and forgiving.

“What the hell El, are you watching fucking romantic movies again?” She utters in disgust while looking
in the mirror putting lip gloss. Seraphina, my ever-supportive-loyal-best-of-all-bests friend, or at least
that what she said.

“I knew it! I knew that they would end up together, Rosalyn and Brant. Why would the writer give them
such hardships, she could just give them a happy ending that they deserve” But of course it can never be
easy? They would have never realized that they deserve each other and that they would never know
how important it is to value a person so much. If Brant and Rosalyn were never separated from all of the
lengths, they never would have realized that love is worth fighting for no matter what.

I feel dizzy from the thought of it.

“Quit it already and eww why do you even watch movies like this when it’s not even your thing? And
besides they would eventually have sex and he would get her pregnant. They don’t even use condom
before eww babies” true, I don’t even believe that true love exists because of mommy’s pure whore
nature but I glare at her from being so obstructive. She just raised one of her eyebrows still looking at
the mirror and gave me her middle finger. Bitch!

I was about to tell her that Brant had happen to impregnant her indeed but my phone rings.

When I saw who it was, I feel uninterested all of the sudden

Annoyed I say “yes hello? What do you want?”

Seraphina chuckle and I know she knows who’s the one calling “show some little interest at least” she
said grinning.

fuck you I mouthed. She just rolled her eyes and whispered “put on speaker” so I did

“El, I thought. . . . . .. I thought I was the only one” Speaking of complicated relationship, I made myself
one.

She chuckles and whispered “pffft, what a stupid-ass-whiner”

“Ah yeah about that Ricky, sorry it’ll never work out between us. Your just so….”

“stupid and a fucking unattractive dumb-ass-nerd” Seraphina said… I was about to say impeccable or
innocent but…

“Gee thanks Sera. What would I do without you” I was being sarcastic but she wouldn’t care anyway?

“Yeah Sorry Ricky Baby, I think you should stop hanging around with me from now on” I say playing with
the tune of my voice.

“But I thought… you said you like me and I was the only guy that you like the most and that we look
good toge---” he cried

“Yeah, well I guess you can now stop dreaming because it will never going to happen… Bye and have a
good life” I cut him off and hang up.

I eyed Seraphina and she’s grinning “Elisha Shianne Robin. You. A. bitch”

“A bitch indeed” I say proudly.

***

Elisha, I laugh from the thought that my mother gave me that name. Maybe she assumed that I would
turn out to be saint or at least be obedient with her words but who the hell is she kidding. She’s the one
who taught me that there is no such thing as true mothers love or just true love in general. It’s just all
made up in the book, made up in movies like a made-up myths or fairytales. It’s Bullshit and She doesn’t
deserve to be even called mother, it’s a waste of words. What she only cares about its sex and she
doesn’t even care about me.

“What are you thinking” Ryan said with a husky voice and kiss my neck.

Ryan, the guy I replaced for Dear-goody-two-shoes Ricky and I don’t regret it. I’m a pure whore after all.
He is hot, got an average dick and got a lot of money. Ricky is just plain nerd and yes, I played him just to
pass the prelim exam. It was a bitchy move but I’ll do anything to have good grades except of course
sleeping with a teacher, gross.

“hey, what’s going on with that pretty head of yours? Hmm?” he seductively whispers on my ear and put
his hand under my shirt which takes me by surprise.

“hmmm” I moan in pleasure.

After the calling drama, Seraphina had taken (more like forced) me to go to her cousin’s party, Riley,
which I don’t think I was invited by how irritated her cousin look like when she sees me. She always
hates me; I was the reason that her relationship with 2-years boyfriend Kyle ended. I dated him for 4
months and he keeps ignoring me it at first but ended up having sex with me on his car one night. When
she found out later, she started to hate my presence now she would be even more irritated with my
existence. If she sees me having sex with one of her friend’s boyfriend in her parent’s room, she’ll be
furious which I don’t mind.
“I was just thinking of you baby and how delightful it would be if you start filling my insides” I said biting
my lip and I put my hands on his tights. He then hurriedly takes off his clothes, takes off my skirt, put
condom on his cock and fucks me. What a poor-thirsty man being utterly and completely under my
spells well I mean who can resist my beauty anyway.

In the morning, it became dramatic for me and that my prediction was right about Riley being angry
over what she saw, me and Ryan being naked, having sex on her parent’s bedroom. I put on a bitchy
face and ignore her endless grumbling which made her even more furious.

“What I want, I get” I told her and left.

MONDAY

It’s my first day being a senior and its crap for me obviously because I hate school but not entirely since I
have lots of friends (I don’t know though if their garbage or true but yeah, a lot) and that there’s a class
that I only prefer and can stand, English writing which everyone doesn’t know that I absolutely into
because who am I kidding ? well except for Seraphina.

“Hey El”

“hey pretty, wanna have fun?”

“hey babe”

“I can get you a ride tonight”

“hey bestie, how are you?”

“hey El, your so pretty”

Fake, fake and fake. I know some of them are just being so fake nice when they approach me but of
course I don’t mind the attention.

“hey what up” I say hi to Seraphina who was looking like she’s been drinking all night

“Ughh… I sneak out and had tons of drink last night at brandon’s party which was an awesome party and
when I came home on 3 am, my mom caught me trying to get to my window and keep forcing
me to go to school today which I ended up even if I get a hangover. Fuck” She said as she leans
beside my locker and I can still smell either bear or vomit in her mouth. Disgusting.

“Well at least your car still yours, right?” I said while unpacking books on my bag and putting it in my
locker.
“that’s the worst part, I’m not allowed to drive it for a month. Its sucks” she said and I know that’s a big
deal for her because she loves to go out every time her parents are out for work on the night
duty or when their away on business trip.

“well you’ll never know; bet they’ll be on a business trip tomorrow or something” I say as I close my
locker.

“well they already send it to my lovely cousin’s mom Eurydice because her car got wrecked last
Thursday, so I’m fucked” ow she’s fucked up no doubt

“Well as long as I’m free no worries” I said assuring to her

“You fucking bitch. I know I can count on you” she said trying hug me but I avoided her since her breathe
stinks so much. She then pouted and I rolled my eyes

“and since you said your okay with driving me to any party, how about tonight at Larry’s?” she said
thrillingly and I frown

“Yeah, I agree to drive you into any party as long as I’m free” I said emphasizing that I can’t tonight in
which she already knows why I can’t.

“Your planning on something again” she said wearing an I’m-counting-on-you-on-this on her face and
then I just shrug.

As we hear the bell ring, I told her I’ll head for the lavatory first to have a final look of myself before I go
to my first class. When I was about to go there, I stop shortly when an unfamiliar attractive face
which I realized was a new student was, I think trying to find his room or something.

“hey there” I said sweetly as I approach him. Now I can have a better look on his handsome face and
maybe I can offer him lunch and then we fuck?

“hey, can I ask where room 240 is” he said looking at a piece of paper which I think was his schedule.

“Ow, it’s heading from that hallway and then take left, and then you’ll just follow the rooms starting
from 238” I said optimistically at him but I think he doesn’t notice.

before he could say anything…

“Care to join me for lunch later?” I offer

He smiles and said “Thanks for the offer but I can’t… I have to go”

I was left dumbfounded. Did he just reject my offer? What the hell?