Born to Dent the Universe

From the
Author of
The Pencil
in You

PENCIL
Goals

Dr. Dhally M. Menda

 PENCIL Goals

PENCIL Goals

Born to Dent the Universe

I Dent
Do you?

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 Introduction

Intentionally left blank

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 PENCIL Goals

Dr. Dhally M. Menda

PENCIL Goals

Born to Dent the Universe

The Menda Publications

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 Introduction

PENCIL Goals
Born to Dent the Universe
By Dr. Dhally M. Menda

Copyright © 2015

1st Print October 2015

Reprint April 2017

ISBN 978-9982-9992-0-5

All rights reserved. Do not reproduce or transmit any part of this

book in any form or by any means now known or to be invented,
electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording or by
any information storage or retrieval system without the written
permission of the author.

Publisher:
Dr. Dhally M. Menda

Printed in Zambia by:

Litovia Limited

Cover Design & Picture: Dhally M. Menda

In Text Pictures: David K. Menda, Wikipedia & Fotosearch
Diagrams: Dhally M. Menda

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Christine, David & Rebecca Menda

I dedicated this book to you.

I am proud to have you in my life.
Day in, day out, I keep on admiring the dents you have made and
keep on making in my life.

“You are the same today that you are going to be in five years
from now except for two things:
The people with whom you associate and
The books you read”
Charlie Jones

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 Introduction

Also by Dr. Dhally M. Menda

“The Pencil in You - 2009”,

“TAP Analysis - 2012”
“PENCIL Goals -2015”
“Adolescent Owner’s Manual -2015”
“Motivational Interviewing for Risk Reduction in Adolescents –
MIRRA – 2015”
“Succeeding with Your Research Proposal – 2016”
“ The Past Driven Life – 2016”
“59-10, The Journey of a teenage Mother – 2017”
“Why I chose Rebekah – 2017”

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Contents

Also by Dr. Dhally M. Menda vi

The Author ix
Acknowledgments xi
Testimonies xiii
Introduction xiv
1: Mental Progeria 1
2: The First Creation 11
3: The Child in You 19
4: The Child s Killers 23
5: Child, Come Forth! 35
6: PENCIL Tested Goals 57
7: Perceived Goals 67
8: Earmarked Goals 71
9: Needed Goals 85
10: Clear Goals 95
11: Idiotic Goals 101
12: Laborious Goals 107
13: Anatomy of a Goal Card 113
14: The Birthing Cycle to Greatness 143
15: Reverse Goaling 155
16: The Night Journey 165
17: Platform Creation 179
18: Birthing 197
19: Allelopathize 217
Contact Dr. Dhally M. Menda 243

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The Author

Dr. Dhally M. Menda

Dhally M. Menda, the Doctor: Public Health Physician with more

than 26 years of experience in clinical care and public health
programme design and management.
Holder of a Degree in Medicine, a Master Degree in Public Health
(MPH), a Master Degree in Business Administration (MBA), a
Diploma in Management and Administration, and a Diploma in
Health System Management. He is currently pursuing his PhD in
Motivational Interviewing in the delivery of Essential Newborn
Care health education. Dr. Menda is the Head of Health
Programmes Department at the Churches Health Association of
Zambia (CHAZ).

Dhally M. Menda, the Lecturer:

Part-time Senior Lecturer at the University of Lusaka (UNILUS),
Zambia; and at the Roehampton Online University, UK in the
School of Public Health.

Dhally M. Menda, the Preacher:

Minister of the Gospel of Christ for the past 20 years and
pastoring at the Christian Way Tabernacle, Lusaka, Zambia.

Dhally M. Menda, the Philanthropist:

Founder Chairperson of the Rural Children’s Hope “RCH” –
www.hoperch.org, for Purpose NGO, which, for the past 20 years

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 Introduction

has put a smile on the face of rural children through education,

water provision, material support and health care;

Founder of the Pencil Academy Limited, for Purpose

organization dedicated to inspire human being and help them
achieved their best in whatever domain of their lives.

Dhally M. Menda, the Motivational Speaker:

Works closely with young people in the field of behaviour
formation and behaviour change. Motivational speaker in the areas
of Men and Women’s Health, Marriage Building, Team Building,
Psycho-social Counseling, and Organizational Stress and Anger
Management.

Dhally Menda, the Husband and Father:

Married to Christine Mwasiti Menda, with two children. Speaks
fluent English and French;
He is also member of several national and international
Professional Societies.

The years passed travelling on this earth and the exposure acquired
over half of century, the interactions with human beings and inert
things, and the service to humanity have made Dr. Dhally Menda
qualify to write this book. He is the one this book was waiting for,
since the creation of the world, for it to become real and be placed
in your hands. Read it!

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Acknowledgments
The Lord Jesus Christ gave me the breath of life, the inspiration,
the fingers and the time to write this book. I thank Him.

My Beloved Christine Mwasiti Menda, my great woman.

I enjoy sharing with you my crazy ideas, because you help me
polish and finalize them. You are my greatest goal ever achieved! I
am grateful to you for all my pilgrimage’s dents.

David and Rebecca Menda, my mentors and guide in the “youth’s

Affairs”. You continue to inspire me and to speak on behalf of
other teenagers and young people. You made me write several
drafts of both cover and content of this book. Your insight and
knowledge of Shakespeare’s language have helped me perfect the
book.

Modeste Kazadi Tshakatumba, known as Kaseki, you kept the child in

me alive and vibrant. You taught me how to work hard and never
give up in life. You built a very strong platform on which your
children still stand to dent the universe. Thank you for allowing me
to fulfil my idiotic dreams. You are no more, but your platform
still stands…

Marie Mutoba Kambemba, while nursing you in hospital, during your

last days of life, I wrote chapters 4 and 5 of this book. Through
out your life, you were an inspiration to me. Even in your sickness,
you still inspired me. You made of me what I am today. I am
proud to be your son! Rest in peace.

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 Introduction

Catherine Mulikita, as it was for my two previous books, you there

to render your services and help me review draft two of my book.
Your comments, insight and proofreading are appreciated.

Dream. Achieve. Inspire.

Dr. Dhally M. Menda,

MD, DHSM, MPH, MBA, PhD(c)

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Testimonies

“This book is an eye opener. It has helped me realize that I need more than
one goal in my life.
When I was a child, I could easily become so many things, and whatever I
wanted to become, but I have lost that capacity… The facts in this book are
true. We need to go back to our childhood.”
Catherine Mulikita,
Lusaka, Zambia

“This is a wonderful book. It will always be useful, both now and in the
future, and its richness will not cease. To me, this is a guide in my current and
future life and a reference manual on how to achieve my set goals. Simply put,
this book is a guide, a reference and source of wisdom”
David Kazadi Menda,
Iowa, USA

“This is not a book, it is a message. This is one of the best books I ever
reviewed.”
Kenneth Jinaina,
Lusaka, Zambia

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 Introduction

Introduction
The love of the human race and the desire to give my fellow
human beings hope and future has pushed me to read, research
and write evidence based and scientific concepts on the
materialization of dreams and goals in a colloquial language.

First in its kind, this book is meant to give you simple principles,
packaged in acronyms you can easily remember, and which may
help you draw your dreams on the canvas of your mind, refuse all
the negative opinions which were loaded on you for years by the
people you live with, and come up with crazy goals and
systematically accomplish them one by one.

This book opens to you the way to your greatness through the
Birthing Cycle to Greatness (BCG), a ‘vaccine ‘ that you badly
need to immunize you against ‘TB’ or being Troubled and
Beaten by the challenges of life, oppositions and failures. While
being helped and supported by the ‘Yes Faces’, this book teaches
you on how to unmask and deal with the chemicals produced by
those who want to see your dreams die. I mean the ‘No Faces.’
This book will help you Allelopathize and defeat the people who
want to see you fail.
Turn this page to learn more on how you can dent the universe
and leave a legacy behind.

Dr. Dhally Menda

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19
Allelopathize

!"
“…this dreamer is coming.
Come now therefore, and let us slay him…
we shall see what will become of his dreams”
Genesis 37:20
#$

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 Allelopathize

ALLELOPATHY
I am sure this is the
first time you are
“Ask those moving with ‘sand’ in their
coming across this
word! pocket, in readiness to put it in your
This word, which is gearbox to leave your platform.
best known in the You do not need them”.
agriculture sector,
comes from two Dhally Menda
Greek root words:
allelon and pathos.
The Greek allelon means ‘of each other’, while pathos means ‘to
suffer’. When combined, this word means ‘the injurious effect of
one upon another’. Allelopathy is defined as ‘any direct or indirect
harmful or beneficial effect by one plant on another through production of
chemical compounds that escape in the environment.’

My intention is not to teach you Greek or agriculture, but to help

examine what takes place in nature, to better understand your day
to day life, in relation to goals setting and birthing.

I am very much aware that people tend to always hide their plans.
They think that revealing future plans would be jinxing it and that
the people they have shared with their plans can block their ways!
This may be true, if it is done in the early stages of the Second
Creation.
Remember to do the “Night Journey” first, before creating a
“Platform”! Do not forget to look at the faces! Always go for the
‘Yes Faces’.

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Revealing your goals too early, beyond the realm of your trusted
people has the potential of unearthing opposition, challenges,
critics, discouragements, jealousy and some may just decide to kill
your plans.

Not everybody is happy to see you succeeding in life. The story of

Joseph in the Bible should speak volume to you. Just the fact of
him narrating his dream to his own brothers brought him so much
trouble, to the extent of being sold in Egypt. Shared dreams or
goals have the potential to ignite jealousy and opposition. But you
can manage it! Joseph kept walking and his dream became true!

LIKE WEEDS
The moment you draw an image on the canvas of your mind,
know that hundred and one people will stand before you in
readiness to kill that dream. It is not given to everyone to dream
and have an idea! This is why vigilance is required.

Your PENCIL® goals, the moment they are put on a piece of

paper, become part of the public domain and anyone can access
them and know your future plans. The goals map you developed
after a careful reverse goaling and night journey highlights the
details of your plan and the names of the people who may assist
you in the fulfillment of your goals. These documents are the blue
print of your destiny and they require some protection. There are
people out there who are just waiting for an opportunity to put
sand in your BCG Gear and jam the movements expected to birth
your goals.

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Resources on earth are limited and everyone is trying to survive

and fulfill their dreams. Even for those without dreams, they drift
with the current and end up competing for the limited resources.
This is the world you are evolving in. Along the way, you find
good guys and bad guys. As you progress towards the fulfillment
of your dream, you will meet friends and enemies; you will meet
supporters and opponents. Some people will do their best to kill
your dream while it is still in your mind!

But you need to survive. Do not be discouraged by dream killers,

and critics; bounce back like a weed. Use your chemicals to survive
and materialize your dreams. Remember, you are fighting for the
space to survive and the nutrients are limited.

To survive, you need to secure the space on which to build your

platform and ensure its safety. You live in a world where people
will not hesitate to cut the pillars of your platform and make it
collapse. Joseph in the Bible was sold to Egypt by his own
brothers, because they did not want him to fulfill his dreams. I call
the dream killers ‘Herods’.

THE HERODS
When plants compete for territory with weeds, the weeds win.
Why do they win? They win because they are able to Allelopathize.
You are also called to Allelopathize.

When drawing your image on the mind’s canvas, do not forget to

emit your chemicals. When doing your reverse goaling, produce

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your chemicals. When night journeying, produce your chemicals.

When building your platform and birthing your goals, never forget
to produce your chemicals. This is the only way you can neutralize
the negative forces around you, which the Herods are producing.

There are people who, once they hear about your dreams and your
goals, will do their best to come closer to you. They come from the
pool of family members, relatives, acquaintances, friends,
classmates, workmates, neighbours, church mates, etc. They will
come to you and tell you that they are there for you. If they do not
have the guts, they will send emissaries to you. Remember the
story of Herod and Jesus Christ?

Herod wanted to know where Jesus Christ was going to be born,

not for him to go and worship him, but for him to go and kill him!
He did not like the news that Jesus was born a King! He wanted to
remain the only and one king of the Jews. Supremacy, selfish
ambitions, jealousy and greed pushed Herod to try to kill Jesus
Christ, even if he was but a child!

All the friends around you need to be tested with your chemicals.
Allelopathize them and watch their reaction.

Deliberately hide something from them and observe their reaction

when they discover that you had hidden something from them.
Your chemical will kill them and they will take their distance and
depart from you. This is a positive allelopathy.

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Oppose their views and give a different opinion and watch. They
will wither and die away. Positive allelopathy!
Repeat to them what they say about you and your dreams in
darkness. They will wither and die away!

Deliberately expose before them a very good plan that you have
and see the way they are going to oppose and discourage you from
doing it. Hear them tell you that it is impossible and that you do
not have the means to fulfill it.

Ask for help and listen to what they will say after helping you and
the comments they will pass.

It is paramount for you to know the tactics used by ‘herods’, once

they get wind of a dream ready to be materialized. Herods do their
best to kill your dream and they produce different types of
chemicals. Herods produce critics, discouragements, distractions,
sabotage, opposition, and challenge.
Herods do character assassination.
It is very easy to identify and recognize Herods. They have large
pockets full of sand and walk with both hands in their pockets.
Whenever they pull out their hands, it is to put sand in somebody’s
BCG gear.

SAND IN YOUR BCG GEAR

As you walk your way towards your destiny, you will meet all sorts
of people, some willing to help you in the materialisation of your
goals, and others ready to sabotage all your plans. The majority of

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the people you will meet are herods. Besides being “No Faces’
herods always move with sand in their pockets, ready to put in
your BCG gear.

First Attack: Discouragements and Criticisms

Herods will put sand in your

Reverse Goaling and Night
Journey’s Gear
The early stages of your BCG
are the most critical, once
sabotaged, the dream you
took time to paint on the
canvas of your mind will never have a chance to reach the stage of
‘Second Creation’.

Once they get wind of your projects and dreams, the ‘Herods’ will
come your way and emit their chemicals. Remember the definition
of Allelopathy:

“Any direct or indirect harmful or beneficial effect by

one plant on another through production of chemical
compounds that escape in the environment”

Discouragements and Criticisms

Directly or indirectly, these people will try to

harm you or your dream with discouragements
and criticisms. Herods will first tell you that

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what you are trying to do will not work. They will give a list of
people who had similar dreams and failed terribly, never to
recover. But if you persist and move ahead with your dream, they
will then move to criticisms. Whenever they have an opportunity,
they will criticize you and your dream. They will belittle it and
laugh at it. This is what I call ‘putting sand in your BCG gear’.
These acts are very damaging and can easily block the movements
of your BCG gear and put to halt your goals.

Positive Attitude

To prevent a total blockage, you need to oil your BCG gear. A

Positive Attitude is the chemical you are called to produce at this
stage.

Positive Discourageme
Attitude nt
Diagram: Allepathizing Herods’ 1st stage attack Criticism

Air Conditioner (Air Con) or Thermometer?

I always compare a correct attitude to an air conditioner.

Depending on the season of the year, I do change the temperature
of my office air conditioner.

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During winter, I set it at a higher temperature and during summer;

I set it at a lower temperature. When set at 25 degree Celsius, the
air conditioner will take control of the room temperature.
Whenever the temperature goes above 25 degree Celsius, the air
conditioner will go on and bring the temperature down to 25◦C;
and when the room temperature goes below 25◦C, the air
conditioner will stop to allow the room temperature to rise to
25◦C. The air conditioner is in control of what goes around it,
thanks to its thermostat.

A thermostat is a component of a control system which senses the

temperature of a system so that the system's temperature is
maintained near a desired set point.

The name is derived from the Greek words thermos "hot" and statos
"a standing". The thermostat does this by switching heating or
cooling devices on or off, or regulating the flow of a heat transfer
fluid as needed, to maintain the correct temperature. The
thermostat controls the room’s temperature.

But this concept is not applicable to the “thermometer”. A

thermometer is a device that measures the temperature of things.
The name is made up of two smaller words: "Thermo" means heat
and "meter" means to measure.

When you look at a regular outside bulb thermometer, you'll see a

thin red or silver line (coloured alcohol or mercury) that grows
longer when it is hotter. The line goes down in cold weather. Both
mercury and alcohol grow bigger when heated and smaller when
cooled. Inside the glass tube of a thermometer, the liquid has no

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place to go but up when the temperature is hot and down when

the temperature is cold. In this case, the room’s temperature
controls the thermometer. Which one do you want to be?

When you meet the ‘herods’ and you listen to their criticisms and
words of discouragement and mockery, what will you do?

Will you behave like an Air con or a thermometer? The ‘herods’

talks determine the temperature in your mind. If you have a
thermometer in your mind, you will give heed to their sayings and
allow them to change your dream’s momentum. Their criticisms
will affect you and push you to drop your idiotic goals. On the
contrary, if you have a thermostat in your mind, it will control and
filter what was said to you. Since the criticisms and
discouragements are not at the set temperature of your dream, you
will cool them down and turn them into a positive energy to
propel your dream.

React!

See?

You have the choice between internalising the discouragements

and criticisms from herods and throwing them away and move with
your life.

React to the herods’ chemicals and make a choice. When you TAP
(Take, Analyze and Permit – read my second book entitled TAP
Analysis. The Art of Making Informed Choices) the herods’

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voices, you will quickly realize that they should not be allowed in
your life.

The best way to respond to the chemicals produced by the ‘herods’

is by producing your own chemicals! Remember that you have
within you a very powerful chemical called “Positive Attitude”, which
has the power to neutralize their chemicals. When herods release
poisonous chemicals towards your dreams, in response, produce
an antidote which will not only neutralize their chemicals, but also
eliminate them from your sphere of action. This is what I call
Allelopathy.

Allelopathizing from the very inception of your dreams will allow

you to move forward with your planned activities and gradually
materialize your goals. Be swift with your reaction because a
delayed response may be damaging to your plans and make you to
lose focus.

Control your Environment

You are called to be a thermostat. Be in control of your life and

the environment in which you are evolving. Be in control of the
atmosphere created by the people around you. This is what you
need to do, and I will put it bluntly:

• Push far away people who are negative. Why keep closer
people who are not beneficial to you?
• Bring closer positive and understanding people. Give a
place to such people on your platform and control their

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assistance and influence on you. Subject them to your

dream’s temperature, in accordance to the progress made
towards your set goals.

Second Attack: Distraction

Herods will put sand in your Night

Journey and the Platform Creation Gear

If your dream survives the early stage

attacks, meaning despite meeting the
herods, you managed to allelopathize
by producing your ‘Positive Attitude’,
and do your ‘Reverse Goaling’ and
identify the people who may be useful in the realization of your
goals, know that the herods will not give up. They will change their
strategy and attack you as you try to come up with a platfrom.

Distraction

The formation of the platform is a key sage in

the realization of your dreams and the herods
will do all they can to block that process and
make your BCG jam.

Herods move with different types of sands. At

this stage of your BCG, they will use another type of sand called
‘Distraction’. Their level two attacks consist of distracting you and
making you lose the focus. They will make you believe that your

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goal is fine, but difficult to be materialized. At this stage, they use

the ‘Yes, But’ technique to convince you drop the pursuit of your
dreams.

The ‘herods’ around you, will do their best to convince you that you
need to cut corners in the implementation of your planned
activities and lower the set standards. Simply put, they will push
you into setting wrong priorities, and help you to spend most of
your time in pleasures and pursuit of futility. “Let’s go and watch
football”, “Let’s go and have a beer”, etc… is the language the
‘herods’ use, as they release their poisonous chemicals.

If you are not careful, you will not discern that this is a stratagem
used to deviate you from your goals and delay the construction of
your platform. These negative forces around you know that once
your platform built, the birthing of your goals will be at the corner.
Herods use all they have to Allelopathize at you and jam your
BCG gear. They will make sure they spend as much time with you
as possible, to keep you away from your planned activities. If they
live far away from
you, they will keep
on bombarding you “For God gave us not a spirit of
with ‘did you hear’
fearfulness; but of: Power, and
stories on the phone
or through emails, to Love, and Discipline”
distract you and fill
II Timothy 1:7
your mind with
useless stuff. Be
careful. Allelopathize

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and keep on building your platform.

Discipline

The chemical to produce, when faced with distraction is Discipline.

You are already at an advanced stage in the construction of your
platform and all you need is to command yourself to hard work.
Tell yourself: “It is time to work”.

Discipline is the force that allows you to harness your will power,
focus and desire to do what you have to do at the time you are
supposed to do it. This reminds me of a story I read, concerning a
discussion between a chicken and a pig. This is how it went:

“Sometimes we think we are committed, but we aren’t.

The chicken and the pig were discussing the matter
through the barnyard fence. The chicken said proudly,
“I give eggs every single morning. I am committed.”

“Giving eggs isn’t commitment, it is participation,”

countered the pig. “Giving ham is commitment!”

Discipline Distraction

Diagram: Allepathizing Herods’ 2nd stage attack

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With your goal map in your hands, after an intensive and

demanding Night
Journey, do not allow
the ‘herods’ to “Discipline is the ability to stay the
participate to the course and complete promises you have
construction of your
made”
Platform. You are
called to work hard Steve Siebold
towards your goals,
because it is your
dream and no one
else on this earth will make it real for you! You are called to be
committed.

For the chicken, it does not cost it anything to lay an egg every day
and give to those who are having their breakfast. But for the pig, it
needs to lay down its life, for the human beings to enjoy ham
during their breakfast. Before being taken to the slaughter, they are
separated from their herd; they are tied and dragged to the butcher.
In the hands of the butcher, they cry, kick their legs and agonize in
pain and shedding blood! That is commitment…sacrifice.

Called to Produce ‘Ham’

Every time you take ham for breakfast, remember that a pig lost its
life, after going through isolation, suffering and shedding of blood.

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Every time you see somebody who has fulfilled his or her dreams,
know that he or she had to sacrifice a lot of things. They had to die
somehow…

Like the pig, you are also called to produce ‘ham’ before achieving
your goals. Platform construction goes with sacrifice and total
commitment.

Are you ready to:

• Separate yourself from the crowd and the bumper-to-

bumper road?
• Be drugged into controversies by the herods who enjoy
character assassination and blood shed?
• Cry and kick your legs in agitation, going up and down
looking for solutions and people to bring on your
platform?
• Agonize with pain, sweat and even shed blood, as herods
put humps on your way?

To get the right people who can contribute to the materialization

of your dream, you need to die a little. You have to do whatever it
takes for you to achieve your goal, e.g. working long hours,
depriving yourself from entertainments and the pleasures of the
world, researching and spending long hours reading books and
consulting people who have succeeded in life.

Do not waste your time discussing with chickens that do what is

convenient to them, and all they know is to lay eggs!

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You have a platform to build… wake up and put on your overalls

and go to work.

Third Attack: Sabotage

Herods will put sand in

your Platform Creation and
Goal Birthing Gear

Throughout my carrier,
there was nothing which
made me sad as the loss of
a baby. I could not just
accept that the nine months of pregnancy, attendance to antenatal
services and other medical services be translated into a stillbirth,
because of the negligence of a midwife. Last minute labour
mismanagement by a midwife causing the death of a baby, who
survived all the odds for nine months, always made me sick and
angry. It was just unacceptable.

Like a negligent midwife, herods will do the same to your BCG.

They will stand on your platform and guarantee you that they are
there for you and to assist you as your dreams comes to
materialization. Just before birthing, they will strangulate and
asphyxiate your goals with sabotage. All your hardship and
sacrifices translated into failure. You would have failed!

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Sabotage

Not all dreams will materialize as per your plans.

You shall face challenges and sabotage as you
walk towards your goals.

The inability of the herods in making your BCG

gear jam in its early stages will push them to join your platform as
friends. They will disguise themselves and walk besides you as
advisors, with the
single mission of killing
your dreams. They will "Every great cause is born from
exploit every repeated failures and from imperfect
opportunity to analyse achievements."
your dreams, go
through your goal map Maria Montessori
and study the way your
platform is functioning
and identify the
weakest link to break it and make your dream collapse. Sabotage is
their final chemical weapon to be released. They will produce
sabotage and make of your dream a stillbirth, sorry I meant ‘stillbirth
goal’.

When this happens, do not cry. Failure is the name of the game,
and it can come from the actions of the herods or not. Whatever
the source of the failure, you are called to allelopathize and
produce your chemical called “Persistence”.

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Persistence

Persistence is your response to sabotage and failure. There will be

a time when your BCG gear will jam and fail to materialize your
goals. That should not be the end of you, because it is just a battle
lost, not the war.

Persistence Sabotage

Diagram: Allepathizing Herods’ 3rd stage attack

They Persisted

One day, during a research that I was doing, as I wrote this book, I
came across an article entitled: “But They Did Not Give Up”. The
article listed a number of people who did not give up after failing
in the pursuit of their
dreams, but persevered.
"Little minds are tamed and subdued by
These people
persevered and misfortune; but great minds rise above
allelopathized until their them."
dreams became true and
allowed them to leave a Washington Irving
legacy behind:

As a young man,

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Abraham Lincoln went to war a captain and returned a private.

Afterwards, he was a failure as a businessman.

As a lawyer in Springfield, he was too impractical and

temperamental to be a success. He turned to politics and was
defeated in his first try for the legislature, again defeated in his first
attempt to be nominated for congress, defeated in his application
to be commissioner of the General Land Office, defeated in the
senatorial election of 1854, defeated in his efforts for the vice-
presidency in 1856, and defeated in the senatorial election of 1858.
At about that time, he wrote in a letter to a friend, "I am now the
most miserable man living. If what I feel were equally distributed
to the whole human family, there would not be one cheerful face
on the earth." Despite his failures and defeats, Abraham Lincoln
became one of the greatest presidents of the United States of
America.

Winston Churchill repeated a grade during elementary school

and, when he entered Harrow, was placed in the lowest division of
the lowest class. Later, he twice failed the entrance exam to the
Royal Military Academy at Sandhurst. He was defeated in his first
effort to serve in Parliament. Despite the lost time, the degradation
and failures, Winston Churchill became Prime Minister of the
United Kingdom at the age of 62, from 1940 to 1945 and again
from 1951 to 1955. He was regarded as one of the greatest wartime
leaders of the 20th century. He later wrote:

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"Never give in, never give in, never, never, never,

never - in nothing, great or small, large or petty - never
give in except to convictions of honour and good
sense. Never, Never, Never, Never give up."

Thomas Edison's teachers said he was "too stupid to learn

anything." He was fired from his first two jobs for being "non-
productive." Despite the labelling and poor performance, Thomas
Alva Edison became one of the greatest American inventor
(holding 1,093 patents in his name) and businessman. He
developed many devices that greatly influenced our today’s life,
including the phonograph, the motion picture camera, and the
electric bulb. As an inventor, Edison made 999 unsuccessful
attempts at inventing the light bulb. When a reporter asked, "How
did it feel to fail 999 times?" Edison replied, "I didn’t fail 999 times. The
light bulb was an invention with 999 steps."

Albert Einstein did not speak until he was 4-years-old and did not
read until he was seven. His parents thought he was "sub-normal,"
and one of his teachers described him as "mentally slow,
unsociable, and adrift forever in foolish dreams." He was expelled
from school and was refused admittance to the Zurich Polytechnic
School. He did eventually learn to speak and read. Even to do a
little math. Despite the labels and slowness in learning, Einstein
became one of the most celebrated genius and Nobel Prize winner
the world has ever had.

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Henry Ford failed and went broke five times before he succeeded.
He used failure and the feedback gathered from the mechanical
breakdowns of his cars to fine tune his design ideas and eventually
change the way we travel in city.

Steve Jobs , Apple Computer founder, attempted to get Atari and

HP interested in his and Steve Wozniak's personal computer:

"So we went to Atari and said, 'Hey, we've got this

amazing thing, even built with some of your parts, and
what do you think about funding us? Or we'll give it to
you. We just want to do it. Pay our salary, we'll come
work for you.' And they said, 'No.' So then we went to
Hewlett-Packard, and they said, 'Hey, we don't need
you. You
haven't got
through college "Failure is simply the opportunity to
yet.'" begin again, this time more
Today, Steve Jobs is intelligently."
being remembered as
one of the people Henry Ford
who changed our
way of living,
through his Ipod and Apple products.

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Walt Disney was fired by a newspaper editor because "he lacked

imagination and had no good ideas." He went bankrupt several
times before he built Disneyland. At one time, he was forced to
dissolve his company, and at one point he could not pay his rent
and was surviving by eating dog food.
Despite his failures, anger and depressions as he went through his
many trials, Walt Disney persevered. The lessons from his setbacks
and the wisdom he acquired thanks to his failures, he continued to
take even bigger risks in his animation industry, and succeeded by
becoming a fabulous and rich businessman.

These people never gave up. They all tried and came up with a
different way of doing things, to escape the world of failure,
labeling and discouragement. They never quitted, but exhausted all
the possibilities they could think of. They all had the determination
of a weed. Just like Lincoln, Churchill, Edison, Einstein, Ford,
Jobs, Disney, and many others, you need the determination and
persistence of a weed.

WEEDS’ DETERMINATION AND PERSISTENCE

In nature, plants like the weeds have been gifted with a strong
sense of allelopathy. Wherever they grow, these plants produce a
certain chemical which travels in the soil and kills the roots of the
plants which grow in their surroundings and which compete with
them in getting the soil’s nutrients. This mechanism allows the
weed to conquer territories and easily multiply. This is why farmers

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do not tolerate weeds in their fields and invest a lot of money in

removing them in view of protecting the good crops. Thanks to
their chemicals and survival skills, these plants always bounce back!
They can be removed hundred times, and hundred times they will
come back.

As you walk on your goals’ way and it so happen that you fail,
please do not stop, but keep walking. Like a weed, be determined
and persistent. Learn to bounce back and never quit until you win.
Les Brown, an American motivational speaker, said: “it is not over
until I win.” If things are not going as per your plan and your dream
is not materialized, please do not blame anyone! Just change
strategies and move on. Do not stop, until you exhaust all the
possibilities emanating from inside and outside the ‘box.’
Remember, you did not come on earth to write a fairy tale story of
your life, but you are here to write a true roller coaster life story. If
your previous failures made you live in fear and adopt a fetal
position, the time has come to stand on your feet and the
failure:’Here I come!’ Get hold of your three ‘Chemical Weapons’,
restart your Birthing Cycle to Greatness and realize your dreams…

MUTUAL INJURIOUS EFFECTS

In ending this chapter, I would like

to summarize it and tell you that you
are on a battle field and you need to
simultaneously keep your focus on

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your goals and on the ‘Herods’. That is why you were given two
pairs of eyes, the physical and the spiritual eyes. Learn to respond
to a chemical attack with a chemical response.
Remember that Allelopathy is all about injurious effect of one
person upon another. You are not fighting against the ‘Herods’,
but against their schemes. Never fight a human being, but fight the
poisonous chemicals in
him or her.
"I don't believe I have special talents, I
Belva Davis once said,
have persistence … After the first
“don’t be afraid of the
space between your dreams failure, second failure, third failure, I
and reality. If you can kept trying."
dream it,
you can make it so”. I do Carlo Rubbia, Nobel Prize winning
agree with Davis. Do Physicist
not worry about the
materialization of your
dreams. Between your
dreams and their materialization, there may be a short distance, for
the short term goals, or a big distance, for the long term goals.
That is the valley you need to go through, before reaching the pick.
In that valley, you shall meet all sorts of ‘herods’, who will come to
you with all sorts of weapons, but keep on walking!

When these ‘Herods’ come to you with criticisms and discouragements,

release your Positive Attitude.

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When the ‘Herods’ try to make you believe that your goal is fine,
but difficult to be materialized at your set standards, do not listen
to them. When they ask you to lower your standards and push you
into distraction, release Discipline.

When the ‘Herods’ sabotage you and you deliver a ‘still goal’, when
they oppose you, and challenge you, release your Persistence.

Never forget to Allelopathize and release your chemicals, as you

cross the valley en route to your destiny. The distance to your
second creation does not matter!

Keep walking, while releasing your three chemical weapons, which

have the power of annihilating all the schemes of the ‘Herods’.
From the conception of your dreams to their birthing, remember
to release:

! Positive Attitude
! Discipline
! Persistence

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CONTACT DR. DHALLY M. MENDA

One-on-one Coaching

Do you need personal coaching to work through a particular issue

in your life? Set up goals for your life? Dhally works with a wide
range of clients on issues ranging from work, motivation and faith.

Speaking Engagements

Looking for a speaker who can craft a programme that uniquely

addresses the needs of your audience? Whether your goal is to
address a specific business or academic need or allow depth and
discussion regarding motivation, faith and values, Dhally can
design a programme customized for your needs.

Strategic Planning Retreats

Is your organization headed in the right direction? Do you operate

as a team? Dhally conducts leadership team’s retreats that help
participants cut through the distractions that hinder success,
solidify team building and reduce organizational stress.

To contact Dr. Dhally Menda, e-mail him at

dhally.menda@gmail.com

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Allelopathize!
If you are told that you are remaining with one
day to live, what will you do? The answer
inside…

In this book, unique in its kind and which

challenges the status quo, Dr. Dhally M.
Menda shows that most of the things which
beautify our lives were created twice: first in the mind of the
inventors, as ideas and dreams and then materialized as
concrete objects.

This book is all about painting dreams on the mind’s canvas,

putting them on paper as PENCIL Goals which are Perceived,
Earmarked, Needed, Clear, Idiotic and
Laborious. You will be guided on how
to instill your PENCIL Goals into the
Birthing Cycle to Greatness or BCG,
for their transformation into reality.
Remember, there are people called
Herods, who will stand between you
and your goals, ready to put sand in
your BCG gear’.

What should you do? Use your Child Emergency Kit or CEK and
Allelopathize. Boldly face herods’ attacks and produce your three
chemical weapons that this book is giving you:
1. Positive Attitude, 2. Discipline, and 3. Persistence.

Twenty five years of clinical medicine and public health practice

and interactions with all the layers of the society, have made it
possible for Dr. Menda to unlock the
secret of achieving set PENCIL Goals.