Unit II: Family Life

Lesson 1: Courtship, Dating, and Marriage

Infatuation or crush - state of being completely carried away by unreasoning desire.

Love – is based on a true desire for the other person’s best interests.

Love Infatuation
Lasting Temporary
“Grow into” “Fall into”
Feeling security Feeling uncertainty
“I love you” “I want you”
Strengthened by time Weakened by time
Based om shared experiences, beliefs or attitudes Based on physical attraction or popularity
Not jealous Inability to trust
Know you can wait to marry Based on sex
Friends as well as lovers No real friendship
Wants what best for the other person Wants what’s best to themselves
Love vs. Infatuation

Attraction – is admiration for someone that may include the desire to get to know that person better.

Courtship – is the period in a couple’s relationship which precedes their engagement and marriage.

Traditional courtship practices in the Philippines

Luzon  suitor threaten to stab his heart while in front of the courted
woman’s father – if refuses, suitor is smitten by a knife
1. Rooster courtship
2. Bagobos of Miindanao
 “negotiator” male chicken is left to stay in the home of the
courted to crow every morning  send knife or spear as a gift to the home of the courted
woman for inspection
2. Tapat (Ilocos Region)  accepting the weapon = man’s romantic intention and
advances
 serenading in front of the woman’s house
Importance of courtship
3. Balagtasan (Tagalog Region)
1. Time to know better (character, background)
 suitor singing, courted lady responds by singing too
2. Time to understand one another
4. Naninilong (Bulacan)
3. Reveals one’s interests, likes and dislikes, aspirations in life
 serenading from the basement
4. Decide whether they are ready to be committed
5. Gestures and actions (Batangas)
5. Determine on what to expect in marriage
 serenading tagalog love songs, doing household chores, pay
respect to woman’s parents – “Mano po” 6. Develops security and respect

6. Pangasinan 7. Acceptance

 Taga-amo - “tamer”, form of love potion or charm Dating – can be enjoyed as part of an active relationship.
 Palabas - “show or drama”, pretends to commit suicide
Types of dating
7. Kalinga
1. Standard Date – two people (one couple)
 Ca-i-sing (Ifugaos)
 Ebgan (Kalingas) 2. Double date – two couples
 Pangis (Tangguians)
 male singing with elderly to test 3. Group date – where any number of couples can enjoy a date

8. Palawan Importance of Dating

 Pasaguli - Love riddles, assess the sentiments of the parents 1. Strengthen relationship
of both suitor and the woman
2. Spend quality time
 Pabalik - dowry for the woman from the courting man
3. Observe each other’s character
Visayas
4. Know one another better
1. Cebu
5. Know one’s strengths and weaknesses
 Balak (seremade)
 Love letters (sent through a trusted friend or relative), 6. Reveal potential problem the partner may have
presents (parents and courted woman), love potions
7. Develop affection and respect
2. Leyte
Engagement – period of agreement entered between two people in love,
 Pangangad/Paninilbihan - household and farm chores to the to know each other and their families, to be sure that they are ready and
family of woman (1 year before married) subok – trial suited for a life-long companionship
Mindanao Marriage – most significant event that may happen to one’s life. It is a
lifelong partnership of a man and a woman
1. Tausugs of Mindanao
Factors to consider in choosing a lifetime partner
 Palabas/sarakahan tupul/magpasumbahi
1. Good character – God-fearing, responsible and honest
2. Maturity – handles relationship responsibly, make wise decisions
3. Fidelity – makes relationship lasting, relationship as sacred
4. Commitment – dedicated in fulfilling responsibilities
1st stage – begins with the first contraction and lasts until the cervix has
opened enough to allow the baby to pass through
2nd stage – starts when the cervix is completely open and lasts until the
baby is delivered

5. Love – strengthens relationship with partner, endures till death 3rd stage – is the final stage of labor, the placenta is delivered. The
mother’s uterine contractions push the placenta or “afterbirths” out of her
6. Economic readiness – able to provide the needs of the family, body. At this time, the birth is completed.
maintains stable job or business that can support a family
Birth – the passage of baby from its mother’s uterus to the outside of her
7. Physical maturity – has a healthy body, accepts and proud of partner’s body.
physical features
Newborns – means a child from the time of complete delivery to 30 days
Ingredients in a successful marriage old.
1. Love 6. Cooperation Newborn screening – procedure to find out if the baby has congenital
metabolic disorder that may lead to mental retardation or even death if left
2. Understanding/Respect 7. Growth untreated.
3. Care 8. Involvement When? – done on the 48th to 72nd hour of life and can also done after 24
hours from birth.
4. Loyalty 9. Sharing and giving
How? – few drops of blood taken from the baby’s heel, blotted on a
5. Shared Philosophy 10. Communication
special absorbent card and then sent to a Newborn screening center.
Lesson 2: Pregnancy-related concerns and prenatal care
Who? – physician, nurse, medical technologist, trained midwife
Pregnancy – is the time when a new cell is formed during fertilization,
Where? - hospitals, lying-ins, rural health units, health centers, and some
grows, and develops into a baby in the woman’s uterus.
private clinics
Phases of Pregnancy
Breastfeeding – traditional and ideal form of infant feeding, meeting an
1st trimester (week 1-12) infant’s nutritional needs for his 4 to 6 months of life.

 missed menstrual period, breast tenderness
 morning sickness, fatigue, mild aching of abdomen
2nd trimester (week 13-27)
 start to look pregnant and wear maternity clothes
 physical discomforts. leg cramps, breast changes, pelvic and
hip pain
 stretch marks and other skins changeshemorrhoids and
constipation
 heartburn (pain in chest and throat) – gastroesophageal reflux
disease
 nose bleeding, gum bleeding, hand pain, numbness (carpal
tunnel syndrome)
 Braxton Hicks contraction (“warm-up” contractions)
Breastmilk – is the best food since it contains essential nutrients suitable
for the infant’s needs. Natures first immunization, enabling the infant to
fight potentially, serious infections
Lactation – period of milk production initiated by the prolactin hormone in
the mammary glands.
Lesson 3: Parenthood.
Parenthood – state of being a parent having a great responsibility or task.
Factors to consider when thinking of parenthood
1. Happiness and stability of marriage
2. Physical and emotional readiness of both partners of parenthood

3rd trimester 3. Financial stability

Responsible parenthood – the will and ability to respond to the needs and
 Braxton Hicks contraction (“warm-up” contractions)
aspirations of the family.
 Fatigue, back pain, pelvic and hip pain, hemorrhoids and
constipation Duties and responsibilities of parents
 heartburn (pain in chest and throat) – gastroesophageal reflux
disease, breathing difficulty 1. Provide physical care and love
 mild swelling of the feet and ankles
 sleeping difficult, frequent urination 2. Inculcate discipline

Mother’s role during and after pregnancy 3. Develop social competence

1. Avoid stressful activities 4. Provide education

2. Do light exercises 5. Train children to become good citizens and financially responsible

3. Eat nutritious foods 6. Guide children to grow spiritually

4. Avoid vices Family structure

5. Have a regular and necessary Blended – 2 families combined (2 single parents married)

Father’s role during and after pregnancy Extended – include members such as grandparents, aunts, and cousins.

1. Take care of the mother and the baby Couples – families without having children

2. See to it that the mother gets the necessary prenatal and postnatal Adoptive – one or more children who were born into other families
check-ups
Nuclear – have parents and at least one child
3. See to it that the necessary immunizations
Single – one parent and one child
4. Provide healthy diet meals for the mother and the child
Family Size
Labor – the process that lasts from the time contractions start until the
delivery of the child and the placenta Small size – parents and at most 2 children

Stages of Labor Big size – parents and 3 or more children and other members