Monastery Reflections: Pause, Reflect, Resume

I’ve been trying to write this post for months. The delay has been a matter of lack of ability to
express the central concept. WHat concept? Well perhaps this sums it up best:

“The more developed a person becomes in the magical sciences of Voudoo (sic), as a esoteric
system, the more one sees the world as a system of forces and influences, which may affect or
effect humanity towards the good or the bad, but which are in themselves neither good nor evil,
and thus such a person has reached a stage of initiation where he is truely (sic) free to see the
world as it truly is, without the colouration of human prejudice. This means that the magician
must gradually seek to build up his understanding so that it will take him beyond the levels of
moral illusion, and when this is achieved, he has attained to the magical and scientific level of
consciousness” Bertiaux M7R Year 3.

Consciousness, morality and change.

Over the summer I experienced a break from routine a chance to pause and enjoy a few months
free from work. While I still had the real world responsibilities of caring for and entertaining a
2 year old I was freed from the daily grind of work and its schedule. Suddenly I noticed that the
structure of daily work made no sense outside of the specific routine. What I was doing was
built around a specific set of life circumstances. A matter of convenience rather than a dedicated
spiritual practice.

Recently I reviewed the lesson “First Temple of the Outer Court Student I Degree, IV. How can
one begin in the world of the Occult ?Lesson D.Occult Examination of Self (1)”ARE THERE
OCCULT SPECIALISTS?”” as part of the study group for Year 1. In reviewing this lesson I
began to reflect upon the last few years in the Monastery and experienced a series of brief and
potent channeled writing.

Well, over 2 years ago I performed the ritual and repeated the adages. I promised to live them as
I worked through the upcoming lessons. While I thought I had stayed true to the work, I fear I
must admit that I lost sight of them. Lost the forest for the trees.

This realization has came recently while working in Year 3. Suddenly the Lessons have become
a jumbled puzzle again. Returning to the word salad and confusion that plagued the early
reading done before beginning to work with you. The Monastery Papers are a potent work of
Spirit development, a complex and powerful gnostic machine that is designed to push the seeker
to develop themselves spiritually. More over it is a living document, which opens up to the
student who meditates upon its pages. Gnosis blossoms and yet these petals had closed
recently.

Why?

The answer was simple. In effort of working through the papers the goal somehow shifted,
becoming an intellectual challenge rather than something to be absorbed. In my arrogance I
tried to own it, tried to fix the papers into a mental construct. If one tires to “get it” and as such
the lessons merely became print. This is what happened, and there was a lack of internalization
and a block to the gnosis.

It took a return to West Virginia, a place that is rich in primal energies. I consider it both a
spiritual and second home. Spending time in the ancient hills and deep woods I relaxed and
stopped thinking and began to listen. In short I met Spirit along the road. The last few weeks
have been filled with creative tension. Pulled between inertia and progress. I needed something
and I was unsure of how to break free from inertia. The answer came from my wife. In a
conversation about our daughter’s picky eating, two year olds are so much fun, she said:

“Its partly our fault. We’re so worried about wasting food and upsetting her that we’re not
encouraging her to eat new things. We’re in a routine and she’s not experiencing anything new”

And there it was a simple answer.

There is a pull towards the irrational in the Monastery. Countless hours have been spent trying
to make sense of it all. So in a rush of meditation and spiritual communion I’ve returned to
the sense of dizziness, confusion, and a tension of the papers. Working through them as gnostic
portals, links to the engines of intuition. These initiation engines allow the student to access and
be taught by the gods. As such Spirit Building would seem to be a process of allowing Spirit in
and shape ones consciousness. As the gods are a larger consciousness than our own we often
must require thought forms to help with this union.

Throughout the recent work has continued to focus on self purification and meditation. Most of
my reading of the M7R papers has become a ritualized format. During this process dreams have
become reflective in nature. Delving into the lessons as both gnostic spaces and living entities.

Over the last few months there has been an purgative feeling to the work. A tremendous amount
of trash has been taken out. Old habit abandoned and replaced by more rewarding ones. I have
started running, eating better, and most importantly for me examining my behavior especially in
regards to patience and kindness. Good traits to develop when one is a parent to a two year
old. This whole process feels like an exorcism. Purging myself of negative habits and thought
forms, replacing them with the the spiritual force of the HooDoo and the Monastery.

Arguably, part of the work in the Monastery is an act of self exorcism. One becomes an agent
of personal change. As we push ourselves to the next level of evolution, there is a type of
spiritual combat the occurs. The magician delves deep into themselves, routing out vice, habit,
routine, and other parasites. Mind you, we’re allowed to have our gross appetites and can
allow ourselves to enjoy life. We’re not locking ourselves away from the world, rather there is
an impetus to be active members of the world. Wandering monks carrying within them their
monastery.
“Man, the living creature, the creating individual, is always more important than any established
style or system.” Bruce Lee

As a male in the West this process of self mastery if often presented in terms of becoming an
alpha wolf. Frequenting the feeds of many men are images of a ferocious wolf, muzzle
dripping with blood,and a quote that inspires the individual to rise up and dominate their
enemies or destroy them in the process. While physical fitness is a key component of a spiritual
practice, and one that has been incorporated into my routine, as my sore legs and aching arms
will attest too. However this illustrates one of the many blinds and traps of the Work.
Buying into someone’s else success and following along blindly. The above example fosters
long outdated and incorrect beliefs about the behavior of wolves and and an out-dated and
possibly dangerous interpretation of “maleness”. Another example would be the massive
industry of political “opinion engineers” the generate propaganda and spin. This kind of
commercialized thought is dangerous, and ultimately leads seekers into blind alleys.

Hence when Bertiaux encourages students to be the masters of their own worlds:

The Magician Will Always Be Looking For Opportunities To Create His Own Magickal
System Of The World. He Will Always Be Looking For Ideas And The Simplest Of
Elements, To Be Found Anywhere, From Which There Will Emerge A Picture Of Reality,
His Reality. The Creative Energies Of Spider-Magi, Who Are True Practitioners Of This
Art Of This Art Of Cosmic Creation, Are Collected From Here And There And Fused
Together Into A Very Wonderful Picture Of Being. This Is The Basis Of Magick — Your
Imagination Is Making The World To Be As It Is In Itself.
– Michael Bertiaux, “Voudon Gnostic Workbook”

Across the board there is a distinct sense of dread in the air and it is affecting even the most
positive educators. This negativity is in part a reflection of the increased negativity and
uncertainty of the US as a whole.

On August 7 I performed a Full Moon invocation of Selene from the Greek Magical Papyri.
Again there was an outpouring of channeled work. While this was motivated by an ongoing
interest in examining the roots of western magic it was in part motivated to handle to massive
wave of negativity and anger of this school year. The fall out of this work has been and
interesting shift in how change is experienced. In context of the recent school year we’ve been
faced with numerous policy and procedural changes which are seen as negative. Rather than
dwell on the negative aspects of these changes I’ve been able to simply see these changes, as
changes. They are not inherently good or bad. They merely are. Rather than dwell on the nature
of these changes time has been spent organizing and preparing staff on how to handle them and
develop responses to them. In some cases some have been motivated on how to make changes
themselves.

This neutrality to morality is becoming apparent in my magical work as well. I’ve been inspired
to investigate area of magic I’ve neglected due to my own misgivings. Currently I’ve been
delving into the Greek Magical Papyri as intuitively I find it is a cross roads of Egyptian, Greek,
Christian, and other forms of magic. A syncretic wonderland of material that both inspires today
and embodies many of the lessons in the Monastery Papers. Somewhere in this current of work
can be found some very specific initiatory engines. . I’m approaching it in a scientific manner
free of personal judgement.

Currently I’m a waiting in an empty classroom writing and awaiting the eclipse, reflecting
upon change and how we as magicians must examine, embrace, and endure it. I am eager to see
where the Work goes from here.

I almost titled this post Total Eclipse of the Art.

You’re welcome.