My Mixtape Autobiography The Mixtape

(2003-present)
2006 – Are You Lonesome Tonight
By David Jazo
2014 – Traumatized

2018 – Goat

2019 – Goosebumps

2020 – You Are Not Alone

 Are You Lonesome Tonight
2006
Are you lonesome tonight
Do you miss me tonight?
Are you sorry we drifted apart?
Does your memory stray to a brighter sunny day
When I kissed you and called you sweetheart?
My grandpa’s name was Francisco Jazo. He is from my dad’s side of the
family. I never got to meet my mom’s parents. I, along with everyone
else who knew him, dubbed my grandfather with the name “Papanino”.
When I was three years old, going on four, I lost him.
I loved Papanino with all my heart. Every time my parents took my
brothers and I to go visit him, he would say “Como esta mi rey?”, which
translates to, “How is my king?” As you could imagine, this made me
feel like a king. I was the happiest little boy alive when I got to see him.
Then, on Christmas Eve in 2006, I lost the one man who truly dubbed
me as King David.
Although I don’t remember how I received the news, I do remember
reminiscing about the very few moments I had with him. By this point I
was only four years old. I barely grasped the concept of death by this
time. I just remembered crying on a car ride home from Monster Jam
because I truly felt lonesome and missed him that night. I asked my
parents why God took him and every other typical line a little kid could
ask at my age? They continued to comfort me and tell me I would
always be his “rey”. They told me he’d always watch over me, even if he
wasn’t there to do it physically.
So, I eventually cried to the point where I had made up my mind he was
in a better place. He couldn’t kiss me and call mi “rey” anymore, but as
long as I don’t let go of his memory, it’ll be ok.
Traumatized
2014
I swear I'm traumatized, I'm hypnotized
Like I'm a reaper, I see blood when I open my eyes
My whole life leading up to this point, I felt like I was the best football
player ever. I studied countless Youtube videos and tried all sorts of
moves out at recess.
One particular day, when I went to go intercept a ball they threw at my
friend Manuel, he dove and hit my ankle. My ankle ended up getting
caught the wrong way and broke. My tibia and fibula had broken along
the growth plate.
As soon as I hit the ground and opened my eyes, I saw hazy. There I
was, one of the toughest kids in my class, lying on the floor, unable to
get up. I was petrified as soon as the surges of pain began to course up
my bruised ankle and up my my leg into my entire body. As a I looked
around screaming and crying in pain, everything was hazy.
I was wheelchaired off the field and into the principal’s office where I
was greeted by the National City Fire Department. My mom eventually
showed up and from the look in her eyes, I could tell she was trying to
stay strong and not cry for my sake. The sight of her made me cry more.
When I got to the hospital via ambulance, I was there until nightfall.
They eventually gave me a numbing shot (that felt like it did absolutely
nothing, which they had told was possible because of the amount of
adrenaline in my body) and cracked my ankle back into place. My father
was in the room with me, holding m hand and holding my torso down
so that I wouldn’t move.
After the correcting was done, they took some more X-rays and MRIs to
ensure the placement of my bones was fine. I lucked out of surgery and
I was sent home that night, still on morphine because the pain was so
great. That day is traumatizing. Although I am past it physically, Goat
mentally, I will never forget it and what it did to me. 2018

No one can stop me, I feel like the greatest

Bro said be humble, I patiently waited
All of this love and I ain't even made it
I got a plan for them niggas that hated

Freshman year was by far my best year of high school. Prior to high
school, I went to Bonita Vista Middle School. I absolutely dreaded every
day I was there for the simple reason that I was a loser in everybody’s
eyes.

At Las Palmas Elementary School, I was a little hot shot. All the girls
liked me, I was the most athletic kid, and the smartest kid.

So, when middle school rolled around, I was no longer either of those
things. My social life suffered the most because I didn’t have any
genuine friends.

When I got accepted into Mater Dei, I was ecstatic because I knew
things were going to be different. It would be a new beginning.

The year started off rocky because I went in with a shattered hand,
however, so many other good things happened that it outweighed
having a broken hand.

I now knew what it felt like to have girls like me. Girls actually liked me.
I also made countless friends inside and outside of school. I never had
friends to sit and talk to in middle school. After my hand healed, I was
finally allowed to lift weights. That was a huge milestone for me.

All this combined eventually overwhelmed me and I became cocky. I

started to view myself as more than what I was. I started to take
advantage of friendships and relationships. I felt like I was the greatest
and that nobody could stop me because I finally felt loved.
I even started to diss people from Bonita because they pretty much all Goosebumps
hated on me or had no idea who I was. I felt like the G.O.A.T even 2019
though I hadn’t really made it yet.

Worried 'bout those comments, I'm way too numb

It's way too dumb, yeah
I get those goosebumps every time, I need the Heimlich
Throw that to the side, yeah
I get those goosebumps every time, yeah, when you're not around
When you throw that to the side, yeah
I get those goosebumps every time

In 2019 I went to a party on Halloween. It was the first “real” high

school party I’d ever been to. By real I mean there were kids popping
bottles, dancing on each other, cigarettes being smoked, and drugs
being passed around. I had no business being there the night before my
football game, but I was there anyway.

As the night progressed and tensions rose among the alcohol induced
teenagers, fights began to break out. One of my friends ended up getting
caught up in a quarrel that eventually led to him getting jumped by a
bunch of kids.

My other friend ended up getting knocked out trying to reason with the
gang of punches being thrown, instead of going in and fighting his way
through. He didn’t know any better. When people comment on my
actions that night, it seems as if I’m too numb to the situation. I had my
reasons for not helping but there’s still that little part of me that feels
like I need the Heimlich procedure done on me to wake me back to
reality; I needed help realizing the true magnitude of what went down
that night and that I probably could have helped.

I still stand by what I did because if I jumped in nobody would’ve had

my back, everybody would’ve came for me since I would’ve been the
biggest guy, I could’ve risked hurting myself for the game the following
day, and I could’ve got in serious legal trouble. All these things
validified what I did in my opinion, however, when people comment on You Are Not Alone
the events of that night, there’s a small part of me that gets goosebumps 2020
over what could have happened had I decided to jump in.

But you are not alone

I am here with you
Though we're far apart
You're always in my heart
You are not alone

Nobody has ever gone through times like these. Never in my life would I
have fathomed being denied my right to go outside my house and
socialize. Never in my life.

I believe socializing is essential to the mind, body, and soul. During

regular school, I socialize in varying amounts depending on my mood
and circumstances the day beholds. However, there is always a moment
in the day when I talk to at least somebody other than my immediate
family. Not text or call somebody; physically be there and talk to
somebody face to face.

A couple people have even shown signs of depression during these

times because they are social butterflies. Especially friends of mine that
are now going to miss out on their senior year of prom, senior pranks,
and graduation night.

I try to encourage my close friends that they are not alone and that
even though we’re far apart, I’ll always be there for them in their
hearts. I tell the seniors that they are not alone.

I feel bad for the class of 2020, but I try to remind them that they are
going through everything with the rest of the world, so prolonged
mourning is not the solution. Everybody must remain positive and be
grateful to God that they are still alive today.