Estefani Arias

Ms. Rivera

ESM 1003-09

July 28, 2016

Tiger Mom Gone Wrong

The way a person is as an individual does not only define them, but also their parents.

Everyone is different, but that can heavily depend on the way one was raised. For many parents

their main goal is to teach their child right from wrong and do anything possible to get them to

succeed. Amy Chua, a professor at Yale Law school and author of ​ Why Chinese Mothers Are

Superior​ is mother of two teenage girls, Louisa and Sophia. She compares Chinese mother’s

parenting to Western mother’s parenting, as she believes the outcomes are the completely

opposite. She makes the reader realize that Chinese parenting is superior Western parenting.

Amy Chua’s authoritarian parenting is reprehensible and unfair, it is only leading her teenagers

to what she believes is successful and not taking there word into consideration. Children should

be able to have a say to their life and succeed while they do activities they desire. Success is very

important but one’s childhood also matters, no child should be overthinking and stressing at such

a young age over the big future ahead of them.

Every parent is entitled to their own opinion and can raise their child how they choose,

but as a parent they should also know that the children must experience new things in order for

them to find their hidden talents. Children are unable to learn everything about the outside world

in the comfort of their home, they should explore and make mistakes in order to learn from them

and know the society they are being raised in. Chua provides us with a list of what her daughters
are unable to do, “Attend a sleepover; have a play date; be in a school playdate; be in a school

play; complain about not being in a school play; watch TV or play computer games; choose their

own extracurricular activities; get any grade less than an A; not be the No. 1 student in every

subject except gym and drama; play an instrument other than the piano or violin; not play the

piano or violin.” Her parenting is brutally unfair. As teenagers they should be able to experience

new things and explore the world to understand more of what surrounds them other than in their

home.

Chua doesn’t allow her daughters to have freedom, instead she pressures them and

doesn’t allow them to relax and do what they desire. David Brooks wrote an article, ​Amy Chua Is

a Wimp​ featured in the New York Times. It establishes how Chua’s parenting style can cause a

lot of pressure on the child and lead to negative results. He states “they’ll grow up compliant but

without the audacity to be great. She’s destroying their love for music.” He is arguing with Chua

as she expresses the pressure she put her daughter Lulu through. Lulu was overwhelmed and

wanted otherwise than to play the piano but Chua does not take her word into consideration.

Instead she threatens her anyway possible. Chua states “ I threatened her with no lunch, no

dinner, no christmas or Hanukkah presents, no birthday parties for two, three, four years.”

Authoritarian parenting skills and consequences can cause one's child to dislike something that

could be very enjoyable and help them relax.

Being under pressure can lead to a negative outcome. As so can not satisfying one’s want

can make someone feel very un useful. Brooks mentioned one of the main ways children believe

is the best way out of things, suicide. He states “there’s a reason Asian American women

between the ages of 15 and 24 such high suicide rates.” It is sad to know that many young
Asian-American women are taking their lives due to societal pressure. “Asian-American college

students had a higher rate of suicidal thoughts than White college students but there is no

national data about their rate of suicide death”​ ​(American Psychological Association). This

shows that authoritarian parenting can have negative effects because one’s child might feel like

they are not able to breath their own air. Chua does not accept any grade lower than an A and

that unfortunately puts her daughters under a lot of stress. If they were to earn a grade lower than

their mother's standards they would have been in big trouble. Although grades do matter the lives

of one’s children always come first. Chua could easily fix the stress level by letting her children

go out and have free time for all the hard work they are putting in, but sadly they are not able to

even say “I had fun at the sleepover with my friend” or even simply play a sport to get things off

their mind.

People may counterclaim that authoritarian parenting is a great solution because it

prepares children for the future and it is what they believe is best in regards to them. After

reading ​The Tiger Mom Responds To Readers, a​ n interview of Amy Chua in The Wall Street

Journal she let’s out the loving and nice mother within her. She was asked if being demanding

and having high expectations leads to the best results and she responds saying “ I think it’s about

helping your children be the best they can be, which is usually better than they think! It’s about

believing in your child more than anyone else, even more than they believe in themselves.”

Although this proves there is a sweet side to Chua, she basically still thinks her parenting is the

best method because she does not look at the opposing side, for example like letting her

daughters have a say and have more freedom when it comes to going out or joining extra

curricular activities. Even though authoritarian parenting seems very strict many may argue that
in the end it is worth it because the child succeeds in school and do as they are told. Yes, their

child may succeed due to authoritarian parenting because they expect the best results, but it also

does put their future at risk. If the parent does not allow their child to make decisions on their

own then they will not be able to be independent. There will be times when their parents won’t

be there to lead them.

Authoritarian parenting is not the best parnting method. Parenting should be about

equality, freedom, succeeding and mainly love. Every parent should let their child have an open

mind and speak up for what they believe in. They should be able to enjoy sports, and be in plays

while they can, one's childhood and teenage years don’t come back. Therefore they should be

able to enjoy it and also do good in school. In the end the parent makes the decisions for their

child, so one should always consider an equal opportunity, and allow their child to have a voice.

Work Cited

Brooks, David. “Amy Chua is a Wimp.” ​New York Times. 1​ 7 January 2011: n. Pag. Web. 2 Feb.

2011.

Chua, Amy. “The Tiger Mother Responds to Readers.” ​The Wall Street Journal. ​Dow Jones and

Company, Inc., 13 Jan. 2011. Web. 2 Feb. 2011

Chua, Amy. “Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior,” ​Wall Street Journal. 8​ Jan. 2011: n. Pag.

Web. 10 Jan. 2011.

Heron, M. (2011). Deaths: Leading causes for 2007. ​National Vital Statistics Reports, 59​, 8.