Loras College Safe Zone Ally Training

Adapted April 2020

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The Safe Zone has been created to respond to the needs of the Loras College community. The
goal of this program is to provide a welcoming environment for lesbian, gay, bisexual,
transgender, and questioning persons by establishing an identifiable network of supportive
persons who can provide support, information and a safe place for LGBTQ+ persons within our
campus community. Additionally, those who have committed to being Safe Zone Allies indicate
that bigotry and discrimination, specifically regarding LGBTQ+ persons, are not tolerated here.

The “Safe Zone” symbol is a message to gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender youth and their
allies. The message is that a person displaying this symbol is one who will be understanding,
supportive and trustworthy if a gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender person needs help, advice
or just someone with whom they can talk. The person displaying this symbol is also a person
who can give anyone accurate information about sexual orientation and gender expression
issues.

Gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender individuals bring a wide range of life experiences to the
college community. Often LGBTQ+ individuals, individuals who are questioning their own
sexual identities, and/or individuals who have LGBTQ+ friends and family members look for
an environment to find support, seek answers to questions, and build connections. Students who
build support networks and find a sense of connection with a college are much more likely to
succeed. For a LGBTQ+ student, having a space on campus where he or she can feel
comfortable with self-expression is vital to both personal and academic success.

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 Research
Here are some reasons that a Safe Zone Ally Program is necessary…
From GLSEN’s (Gay, Lesbian, Straight Network) 2017 National School Climate Survey, we know that schools
nationwide are hostile environments for a distressing number of LGBTQ+ students- many of whom commonly hear
homophobic remarks and face harassment and assault because of their sexual orientation, gender identity, or gender
expression.
 95.3% of LGBTQ+ students heard “gay” used in a negative way (e.g., “That’s so gay”) and 60.3% heard other
homophobic remarks (e.g. “dyke” “fag”) frequently or often at school.
 70.1% of LGBTQ+ students reported being verbally harassed and12% reported being physically harassed because
of their sexual orientation.
 48.7% of LGBTQ+ students experienced cyberbullying via text or social media. 57.3% were sexually harassed at
school.
 60% of the students who did report an incident said that school staff did nothing in response or told the student to
ignore it.

The data below are results from the Loras research study “Diversity and LGBTQ+ Community Views” by
student Krystyna Kaminski (’20), and advised by Professor Michelle Bechen. The data is from anonymous
surveys that were distributed in person to Loras College first-year students in the required course “Engaging
Differences” in Fall 2019. Data collected is 65% of that total first-year class (215/330) that year. Only one
collected survey was left out of recorded data due to lack of serious response (i.e. wrote hippopotamus as sexual
identity). Derogatory language on the survey was defined with examples such as: No homo, he-she, F****t,
homosexual, d*ke, that's so gay, did you just assume my gender, etc.

Demographics of the research:

 53% identified as male, and 48% identified as female. No recorded responses were non-binary or other.
 93% identified as straight. 8% of responses identified as LGBT+, including gay/lesbian, bisexual,
asexual, and demisexual.
 79% identified as white, 5% as black or African American, 12% as Hispanic/Latinx, and 5% identified
as mixed.
Responses to the survey:
 93% stated that they understood what LGBTQ+ stands for.
 97% agree or strongly agree that Loras is a safe and welcoming environment for LGBTQ+ students.
 92% believe that classroom language at Loras is inclusive of the LGBTQ+ community.
 56% stated that they hear derogatory language on campus.
 35% stated that they have used derogatory language in an offensive manner within the past year.
 36% stated that someone else used derogatory language against them within the past year.
 When asked if they believe there should be more designated safe places on campus, 60% agreed.

What surprises you?

Why are these statistics important to know as an Ally on a college campus?

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 Loras College Catholic Identity
Loras College is a Catholic, diocesan college explicitly oriented to promote service of both church and world
through encouraging all members of the community in development of their “diverse professional, social, and
religious roles.”[i] The college strives to be a community demonstrating the highest standards of the Catholic
intellectual tradition and welcoming all people into a dialogue to promote core values of truth, respect,
responsibility, excellence, and service. Recognizing that Christ summons us to “continual reformation” as we
go our pilgrim way[ii], we assert the following principles:

We promote an open atmosphere of critical inquiry and academic conversation that includes varied
voices, past and present, across Catholic and other traditions. The Catholic intellectual tradition upholds
the “impartial search for truth”.[iii] We encourage the ongoing conversation between faith and reason based on
the confident hope that there is in human life a truth founded on reality. We endorse academic freedom which
makes open discussion and inquiry about truth possible.

We reverence the spirituality of each person. From the Catholic perspective, spirituality is a response to the
grace God gives to all to share the divine life and friendship.[iv] Because each person is created in God’s
image, we are responsible to one another and called to respect God’s creation in all its forms. Catholic tradition
has stressed both the dignity of the individual and communal participation in the formation of personal
conscience. “The human spirit must be cultivated in such a way that there results a growth in its ability to
wonder, to understand, to contemplate, to make personal judgments, and to develop a religious, moral, and
social sense.”[v]

We recognize the importance of personal and communal worship. A vital dimension of a Catholic College
is prayer and worship, which increases “our sense of responsibility for the world”.[vi] From the Catholic
sacramental tradition, we affirm the idea of a God who acts in history on our behalf, a God who sent Jesus, who
lived among us, who taught, who died for us, who rose from the dead and is present in the Eucharist and alive
and at work in the world today. We value the integration of the material and spiritual, through creative rituals
for prayer and celebration. We seek a vision that calls for awe and reverence, sends us forth to serve, and
compels hope that “peace would be possible as the result of a ‘more perfect justice among people.’”[vii]

We welcome the responsibility to serve. The Catholic social tradition affirms a solidarity built according to
justice, enlivened and integrated by charity, and put into practice in freedom.[viii] Called to build up the reign
of God, we must meet our responsibilities to protect human dignity. Aware that the world is an imperfect place,
we challenge ourselves to embrace “the joy and hope, the grief and anguish of the men and women of our time,
especially those who are poor or afflicted in any way.”[ix]

We advocate respect for diversity. As a Catholic college, we are called upon to be particularly attentive to the
rich variety among the people of the world. We seek to foster dialogues that will promote understanding,
cooperation and respect. [x] We value ecumenism and collaboration among all people. In every dimension of
what diversity entails, human dignity must always be maintained. We invite all members of the community to
enter serious conversations and ask hard questions that together we might promote the core values of Loras
College.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
[i] Loras College Mission Statement
[ii] Cf., Unitatis Redintegratio, the Second Vatican Council’s Decree on Ecumenism, #6.
[iii] Ex Corde Ecclesiae, Apostolic Constitution of Pope John Paul II on Catholic Universities, #7, emphasis in the original.
[iv] Cf., Catechism of the Catholic Church, #1996.
[v] Gaudium et Spes, the Second Vatican Council’s Pastoral Constitution on the Church in the Modern World, 59.
[vi] Ecclesia de Eucharistia, Encyclical Letter of Pope John Paul II, On the Eucharist in its Relationship to the Church, #20.
[vii] Sollicitudo Rei Socialis, Encyclical Letter of Pope John Paull II, On Social Concern, #10.
[viii] Cf., Pacem in Terris, Encyclical Letter of Pope John XXIII, On Establishing Universal Peace in Truth, Justice, Charity, and Liberty, #167.
[ix] Gaudium et Spes, #1.
[x] Cf., Ex Corde Ecclesiae, #45.

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Loras College Diversity Statement
Revised January 2020

A Loras Community for All

LORAS COLLEGE IS AN INCLUSIVE COMMUNITY OF INDIVIDUALS FROM MANY
BACKGROUNDS AND EXPERIENCES.

Loras is committed to creating an environment where every member is beloved and accepted. Grounded in the
Catholic Intellectual Tradition and guided by Catholic Social Teaching, the Loras community supports
diversity, equity, and inclusion and together creates a culture of mutual respect and understanding for one
another. This is a shared vision and a shared responsibility inspired by the life of Jesus.

Human Dignity
We believe all persons have equal, inherent dignity. At Loras, we affirm that all are created in the image of God
and each individual is treated as an equally valued part of our community.

Justice and Equity

We actively work toward the creation of a more just society. As neighbors in solidarity with one another, we
work for the equitable treatment of all persons. We understand that as long as any individual remains oppressed
we fall short of our own full human potential. We embrace the differences among and between our community
members and acknowledge our human connection for the promotion of justice.

Community
We foster a welcoming and inclusive community in which all members are encouraged to engage in mutual
encounters and accompaniment. As an educational community, it is our belief that diversity, equity, and
inclusion are crucial to living our mission of forming a community of active learners, reflective thinkers, ethical
decision-makers and responsible contributors.

We are committed to providing an educational environment where all can discover who they are called to be in
the world. Through our shared values, our understanding of interconnectedness is constantly evolving and our
commitment to justice and advocacy is unwavering. As a Catholic institution, it is the shared responsibility of
all members of the Loras community to foster these values through the creation of meaningful encounters that
embrace the rich diversity of our global family.

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 Coming Out
Coming out is a lifelong process that begins when a gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender person recognizes their own
feelings and shares those feelings with another person. Since people in this world tend to assume a person is straight,
LGBT individuals are put in the position of deciding who they would like to share this with.

What Stages Are Involved in Coming Out?

The first step an individual in the coming out process may experience is moving toward recognition and
acceptance of one’s own identity. Gaining support from other gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people is
another important part of the process. For some, their first same-sex sexual experience represents a profoundly
important part of the coming out process. Others have acted upon their gay feelings long before and clearly
identified themselves as “LGBT.” Other important parts of coming out include first visits to LGBT
establishments, LGBT organizations and LGBT religious groups – all of which can serve as important supports
for gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender people. Lastly, coming out may involve telling non-LGBT people,
including friends, family members and co-workers.

Why Come Out?

Coming out can help serve a number of important functions:

1. It can help a gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender person feel more positive about himself/herself.
2. It can help a gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender person gain more support.
3. It can make friendships closer by sharing such an important part of one’s life.
4. It can free a gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender person from the “hiding game.” Living a double-
life, one gay and one non-gay, that is draining to physical and emotional energy. Being completely
honest with significant others can be a very enriching experience for a gay, lesbian, bisexual or
transgender person.
5. Our society tends to assume that everyone is heterosexual until proven otherwise.
NDSU, July 2005

Loras College offices available to meet with students regarding LGBTQIA+

Center for Inclusion and Advocacy Counseling Services

5th Floor of the ACC 4th Floor of the ACC
563.588.7205 563-588-7085
Sergio.perez@loras.edu Tricia.borelli@loras.edu

Michelle Bechen Campus Ministry

Associate Professor of Social Work 4th Floor of the ACC
Hennessy Hall, Room 407 563-588-7056
563-588-7325 anastacia.mcdermott@loras.edu
michelle.bechen@loras.edu
Additional Services:
Alliance Office Gender Expression Closet
Hennessy Hall, Room 406 Hennessy Hall, Room 403
thealliance@loras.edu

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 LGBT Students of Color
If you already belong to one minority group…

“I was taught from early on that Latinos and people of color are looked down on,” says Wilson Cruz, who is
Puerto Rican. “Then to be [gay] on top of that is one more thing people can look down on us for.”

Cruz, who played a gay character on My So-Called Life, felt it especially because his Latino heritage strongly
rejects the gay community. “There are certain expectations of what a man is supposed to be, and when you
don’t fit into those molds, you’re seen as less than worthy of your race.”

“But I’ve learned there are certain expectations you will never live up to, and you have to get to the point where
that’s OK. What’s helped me is remembering that I’m only here to be as honest and open as I can be in the life
that’s been given to me. I also expect that anyone who is going to be in my life is going to have to love and
understand that.”

As an African-American lesbian, Linda Villarosa went through a similar learning experience. Confused and not
sure about her sexual orientation, she did not explore her feelings because she was trying to fit into a white
neighborhood and didn’t want to do anything others could think of as wrong.

Finally, in college, “I came out because I couldn’t stand not being myself anymore.” But then she went to work
at Essence magazine and was again afraid to come out. “I think what happens when you’re black is you feel
your community is an oasis against some of the white racist people you know, and you become really afraid
you’re going to lose that.”

But, once again, she found she couldn’t stand hiding any more, and she took the chance. “My boss and I were
in her car coming back from a weekend editorial retreat, and she was saying something about fixing me up with
her brother-in-law. And I just blurted out, I’m a lesbian. She was embarrassed about the brother-in-law and
very kind. And that Monday, I came out to just about everybody else at work, and everyone was fine.”

A year later, she came out to seven million readers in a widely acclaimed Essence article she wrote with her
mother and was later promoted to executive editor of the magazine.

Source: Resource Guide to Coming Out

Issues for Gay and Lesbian Students of Color

When an individual is both a person of color and LGBT, they may feel that only one part of their identity can be
important. As a result, sexual orientation is often underemphasized. For many, it’s difficult to strike a balance
that allows them to be empowered and liberated in both of their oppressed identities. Multiple oppressions
affect their lives because:

1. They feel that they do not know who they are.

2. They do not know which part of them is more important.
3. They do not know how to deal with one part of themselves oppressing part of themselves.
4. They do not have anyone to talk to about the split in personality that they feel.
5. They feel radical and, more often, misunderstood by each group if and when they say that both parts are
of equal importance.
Source: Beyond Tolerance: Gays, Lesbians and Bisexuals on Campus
Understanding Gay and Lesbian Students of Color
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 What About the B and the T?
According to Kinsey, most people exist, on a sexual orientation continuum, somewhere between exclusively
heterosexual and exclusively homosexual. However, we tend to think of sexual orientation in “either/or” terms;
either a person is straight or gay/lesbian. Bisexual and transgender people’s experiences and issues are unique
to them. While an exhaustive discussion of these issues is not possible in this format, additional information
can be accessed via the “Resources” section at the end of this training packet.

Issues for Bisexual People

Bisexuality is commonly defined as a romantic and sexual interest in or attraction to the same and other
genders. However, bisexual people may choose to engage in sexual relationships with only one gender. This is
often difficult for bisexual individuals in male-female relationships, because it is assumed by others or society
that they are straight. If they are in a same-sex relationship, they are often assumed as gay/lesbian. These
assumptions are incorrect because, no matter the type of relationship they are in, they are still bisexual.

For some, bisexuality can be confusing. The discord between orientation and behavior can be made even more
difficult by the perceptions that both gay and straight communities have of bisexual people. More so than with
other sexual orientations, people tend to perceive bisexuality as a “transitional” identity. A common attitude is
that bisexual people are either not ready to commit to an exclusively gay or lesbian identity or that they are
really straight people who are “experimenting.” Either way, we fail to recognize bisexuality as a sexual
orientation in and of itself and we tend to treat bisexual people as “deviant.”

Because the issue of bisexuality can be a confusing one, several issues related specifically to bisexual students
need to be recognized:

1. Invisibility – Although there is a growing recognition that bisexuality is a true sexual identity, it is often
treated as identical to gay or lesbian identities. A presumption is made that bisexual individuals have the
same issues and concerns as gays and lesbians.

2. Biphobia – While bisexual people are subjected to homophobic and heterosexist attitudes and
behaviors, like gays and lesbians, they are also subjected to biphobia (defined as the irrational fear of,
hatred of, aversion to, or discrimination against bisexuals or bisexual behavior). Biphobia exists in both
the straight and gay/lesbian communities; therefore, bisexuals are often stigmatized within their own gay
community. Biphobia also results from the association between bisexuality and HIV; some individuals
believe that HIV has been transmitted from the gay/lesbian population to the straight populations
through interactions with bisexual men and women.

3. Lack of resources and education – Although great strides have been made to education people and
provide resources for and about gays and lesbians, much more needs to be done with regard to bisexuals.

Source: Toward Acceptance, ed. Vernon Wall and Nancy Evans

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 Issues for Transgender People

A transgender person is an individual who presents themself and lives as the genetic “opposite” to their genetic
gender at birth. They would express this as a discord that exists between (external) biological sex and (internal)
gender identity.

Our society tends to make a very clear distinction that there exist only two sexes: male and female. Therefore,
transgenderism tends to make people feel uncomfortable.

Disagreement exists over whether or not transgender identity is a mental disorder. The Diagnostic and
Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders (DSM-IV) includes gender identity disorders (GID) continue to be
included as a psychosocial disorder. However, many believe that having a transgender identity is not a mental
disorder but should be considered a separate identity, as gay identity now is.

Some specific issues for transgender people include:

1. Transition – A transgender person may decide that they wish to transition, male-to-female (M-to-F) or
female-to-male (F-to-M). The physical transition process can occur either through hormone therapy or
gender reassignment surgery.

2. Discrimination – Although sexual orientation in general is not legally protected from discrimination in
all states, the situation is especially difficult for transgender individuals. Currently, Minnesota is the
only state in the country that lists transgender as a protected class; three cities (Santa Cruz, Seattle, and
San Francisco) also protect transgender people from discrimination.

3. Transphobia – Transgender people, like bisexuals, experience prejudice and discrimination from both
the straight and gay communities. Transgender people can be more vulnerable to random homophobic
attacks than LGB people.

4. School and Workplace Issues – Transgender people who wish to transition face several challenges
when doing so at their places of work and schools. Coming out to co-workers as transgender can create
opportunities for more authentic interactions and also for prejudicial behaviors and interactions. Issues
such as which public restroom or locker room to use, if only two options are given, and which box to
check on application materials (school, credit card, mortgage, etc.) are just some examples. Some who
have undergone gender reassignment surgery have needed to change their gender status with the federal
government, as well as legally change their names.

5. Language – It is a challenge to transgender people, especially those who have not yet transitioned, to
know the most appropriate way to identify themselves – such as male/man, female/woman, or non-
binary; he, she, or they.

6. Bathroom usage and the law – Lawmakers have introduced many harmful bills to their state
legislature that create regulations for bathroom usage. Typically, they state that individuals are only
allowed to use restrooms according to their biological sex. The reasoning often used for this is that
without the regulation, men are allowed to enter a female designated bathroom and bring harm to
women and children. There is little to no evidence to support that this is an issue. Bills like these are
harmful to the transgender community. They allow further room for discrimination against trans
individuals. The most notorious bill that successful passed was named House Bill 2, and passed in
North Carolina in March 2016. It has been a constant legal battle for the state since.

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 Issues and Questions for LGBT+ Students

Young people who are dealing with the issues of coming out as being gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender have many
questions. While Safe Zone Allies are not expected to have all the answers to these questions, your attentive listening can
help them sort through these issues.

 Will people still like me?

 Am I being dishonest if I am not “out” to everyone?

 Should I tell my roommate?

 Can I be a student leader if I am gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender?

 Should I make up a boyfriend/girlfriend so no one will suspect?

 My professor made a homophobic remark. Will he/she fail me if I confront him/her?

 Can I put my involvement in LGBT+ clubs on my resume?

 If I go to the student health center, should I “come out” to the doctor or will GAY be written on all of my

records? Will they treat me the same?

 How do I find supportive administrators at the university?

 Can I really choose teaching as my major? People don't want a gay man/lesbian teaching their children.

 What is this university doing to educate others about homophobia or will I have to do it alone?

 All my textbooks have heterosexual examples. How can I ask for there to be positive gay examples used

in my courses? How can I suggest more inclusive language from my professors?

Source: “Got Closet?: GLBT Issues in OUR Residence Halls”

Shawn Volesky & Jeremy Leiferman, NDSU
Presented at MACURH 19

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 The Role of a Safe Zone Ally
What is expected of a Safe Zone Ally

 Provide support, information and referral to individuals who approach you;

 Respect the person’s need for privacy and confidentiality;
 Develop a more genuine and realistic professional relationship with LGBT students, or friends and family of
LGBT individuals;
 Gain a fuller picture of students’ lives and concerns;
 Make a personal contribution to improving our campus environment and the lives of our students;

What is not expected of a Safe Zone Ally

 Be a counselor or expert regarding sexual orientation;

 Create a psychological support group;
 Know the answers to all questions regarding sexual orientation;
 Be the ONLY contact for the gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender community;
 Hear intimate self-disclosures;
 Participate in political activities involving gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender issues.

What is your role as a Safe Zone Ally

Visibility is the most important role you have as a member of the program. Allies will be expected to display Safe Zone
materials in a location that is visible to others. Once self-identified as a Safe Zone Ally, please do the following:

 Don’t assume! Be aware that the individual to whom you are talking could be either straight, gay or lesbian,
bisexual or transgender. Ask about their pronouns.
 Avoid using terms such as “boyfriend” and “girlfriend;” instead, try using “partner” or “spouse.”
 Review your office’s publications. Suggest changes to remove non-inclusive language.
 Acquaint yourself with people who are gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender. Learn about the culture that is
unique to the LGBT community. Read books, make a friend, attend a lecture, or celebrate with them.
 Avoid homophobic, biphobic, and transphobic remarks, jokes and statements. As you feel comfortable, confront
these actions of hatred.
 Create an atmosphere of acceptance in your surrounding environment. Share your experiences with others.
 Learn the developmental process of coming out that is unique to the LGBT experience.
 If you have identified your feelings or gender identity as gay, lesbian, bisexual or transgender, consider coming
out to others and work to provide a role model for students, faculty and staff.

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 Important Points to Keep in Mind

1. Have a good understanding of sexual orientation and be comfortable with your own.

2. Be aware of the coming out process and realize that it is not a one-time event. The coming out process is
unique to LGBT people and brings challenges that are not often understood.

3. Understand that LGBT people receive the same messages about homosexuality and bisexuality as
everyone else. Thus, LGBT people suffer from internalized homophobia and heterosexism. It is
important to recognize the risks of coming out and to challenge the internal oppression.

4. Remember that LGBT+ community are a diverse group. Each community within the larger LGBT
community has unique needs and goals.

5. Know at least basic information about HIV/AIDS in order to address myths and misinformation and to
be supportive of those affected by this disease whether in themselves or in partners and friends. While
HIV/AIDS is a health issue for all, those who live in the most fear and have lost the most members of
their community are LGBT persons.

6. Be aware of resources that are available. Where would you suggest a student go if they were having
serious questions about their sexual orientation? If they were afraid to come out to family/friends? If
they were questioning their faith and orientation?

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 LGBTQIA+ Resource Center Glossary
Affirmed gender (noun): The gender by which one wishes to be known. This term is often used to
replace terms like “new gender” or “chosen gender,” which imply that a person’s gender was
chosen rather than simply innate.

Agender (adj.): Describes a person who does not identify with any gender identity.

Ally (noun): A person who does not identify as LGBTQ, but stands with and advocates for LGBTQ
people.

Androgynous (adj.), Androgyne (noun): Used to describe someone who identifies or presents as
neither distinguishably masculine or feminine.

Aromantic (adj.): A romantic orientation generally characterized by not feeling romantic attraction
or a desire for romance.

Asexual (adj.): Used to describe people who do not experience sexual attraction or do not have a
desire for sex. Many experience romantic or emotional attractions across the entire spectrum of
sexual orientations. Asexuality differs from celibacy, which refers to abstaining from sex.
Also ace, or ace community.

Assigned sex (noun): The sex that is assigned to an infant at birth based on the child’s visible sex
organs, including genitalia and other physical characteristics. Often corresponds with a
child’s assigned gender and assumed gender.

Binary system (noun): Something that contains two opposing parts; binary systems are often
assumed despite the existence of a spectrum of possibilities. Gender (man/woman) and sex
(male/female) are examples of binary systems often perpetuated by our culture.

Biological sex (noun): A medical classification that refers to anatomical, physiological, genetic or
physical attributes that determine if a person is assigned male, female or intersex identity at birth.
Biological sex is often confused or interchanged with the term “gender,” which encompasses
personal identity and social factors, and is not necessarily determined by biological
sex. See gender.

Bisexual, Bi (adj.): A person emotionally, romantically or sexually attracted to more than one sex,
gender or gender identity though not necessarily simultaneously, in the same way or to the same
degree.

Cisgender (adj.): Describes a person whose gender identity (defined below) aligns with the sex
assigned to them at birth.

Cissexism (noun): A system of discrimination and exclusion that oppresses people whose gender
and/or gender expression falls outside of normative social constructs. This system is founded on the
belief that there are, and should be, only two genders—usually tied to assigned sex.
13
Coming out (verb): A lifelong process of self-acceptance and revealing one’s queer identity to
others. This may involve something as private as telling a single confidant or something as public
as posting to social media.

Demisexual (adj.): Used to describe someone who feels sexual attraction only to people with
whom they have an emotional bond—often considered to be on the asexual spectrum. Often
experience difficulties both in and out of the community.

Drag King/Queen (noun): A person who appears as a man or woman in highly stylized fashion.
Generally in reference to an act or performance. This has no implications regarding gender identity.

Gay (adj.): Used to describe people (often, but not exclusively, men) whose enduring physical,
romantic and/or emotional attractions are to people of the same sex or gender identity.

Gender (noun): A set of social, physical, psychological and emotional traits, often influenced by
societal expectations, that classify an individual as feminine, masculine, androgynous or other.
Words and qualities ascribed to these traits vary across cultures.

Gender dysphoria (noun): Clinically significant distress caused when a person’s assigned birth
gender is not the same as the one with which they identify.

Gender expression (noun): External appearance of one’s gender identity, usually expressed
through behavior, clothing, haircut or voice, and which may or may not conform to socially defined
behaviors and characteristics typically associated with being masculine or feminine.

Gender-fluid (adj.): A person who does not identify with a single fixed gender and whose
identification and presentation may shift, whether within or outside of the male/female binary.

Gender identity (noun): One’s innermost feeling of maleness, femaleness, a blend of both or
neither. One’s gender identity can be the same or different from their sex assigned at birth.

Gender neutral (adj.): Not gendered, usually operating outside the male/female binary. Can refer
to language (e.g., pronouns), spaces (e.g., bathrooms) or identities.

Gender nonconforming (adj.): A broad term referring to people who do not behave in a way that
conforms to the traditional expectations of their gender or whose gender expression does not fit
neatly into a category. Also, gender expansive.

Genderqueer (adj.): Describes a person who rejects static categories of gender (i.e. the gender
binary of male/female) and whose gender expression or identity falls outside of the dominant social
norms of their assigned sex. They may identify as having aspects of both male and female
identities, or neither.

Gender roles (noun): The social behaviors and expression that a culture expects from people based
on their assigned sex (e.g., girls wear pink; boys don’t cry; women care for home and child; men
are more violent), despite a spectrum of various other possibilities.
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Heteronormativity (noun): Coined by social critic Michael Warner, the term refers to a societal
assumption of certain norms: 1) that there are two distinct sexes; 2) that male and female functions
and characteristics are distinctly different; and 3) that traits such as attraction and sexual behavior
correspond to anatomy. Those who do not fit these norms—be it through same-sex attraction, a
non-binary gender identity or nontraditional gender expression—are therefore seen as abnormal,
and often marginalized or pressured to conform to norms as a result.

Heterosexism (noun): The assumption that sexuality between people of different sexes is normal,
standard, superior or universal while other sexual orientations are substandard, inferior, abnormal,
marginal or invalid.

Heterosexual (adj.): Used to describe people whose enduring physical, romantic and/or emotional
attraction is to people of the opposite sex. Also straight.

Heterosexual/cisgender privilege (noun): Refers to societal advantages that heterosexual people

and cisgender people have solely because of their dominant identities. This can include things as
simple as safely holding hands with a romantic partner in public or having safe access to public
bathrooms. This can also include systemic privileges such as the right to legally donate blood, to
adopt children without facing possible rejection because of your sexual orientation, or to play
organized sports with others of the same gender identity.

Homophobia (noun): A fear or hostility toward lesbian, gay and/or bisexual people, often
expressed as discrimination, harassment and violence.

Intersex (adj.): An umbrella term describing people born with reproductive or sexual anatomy
and/or a chromosome pattern that can’t be classified as typically male or female.

Latinx (adj.): [pronounced “La-TEEN-ex”] A gender-expansive term for people of Latin American
descent used to be more inclusive of all genders than the binary terms Latino or Latina.

Lesbian (adj.): Used to describe a woman whose enduring physical, romantic and/or emotional
attraction is to other women.

LGBTQ (noun): An acronym for “lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and queer.” Less often, the Q
stands for “questioning.” Acronyms like LGBTQIA also include the intersex and asexual
communities, while acronyms like LGBTQ attempt to envelop an entire community of people who
hold identities that are not cisgender or heterosexual. Adding a “+” after LGBT refers to the
additional letters representing other identities.

Misgender (verb): To refer to someone in a way that does not correctly reflect the gender with
which they identify, such as refusing to use a person’s pronouns or name.

Nonbinary (adj.): An umbrella term that refers to individuals who identify as neither man or
woman, or as a combination of man or woman. Instead, nonbinary people exhibit a boundless range
of identities that can exist beyond a spectrum between male and female. They are often considered
to be part of the transgender identity and community.
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Outing (verb): The inappropriate act of publicly declaring (sometimes based on rumor and/or
speculation) or revealing another person’s sexual orientation or gender identity without that
person’s consent.

Pansexual (adj.): Used to describe people who have romantic, sexual, or affectional attraction to
people regardless of gender. Often confused with the bisexual identity. The term panromantic may
refer to a person who feels these emotional and romantic attractions, but identifies as asexual.

Preferred pronouns (adj.): The pronoun or set of pronouns that an individual personally uses and
would like others to use when talking to or about that individual. Can include variations of
he/him/his, she/her/hers, they/their/theirs, among others. This term is being used less and less in
LGBTQ circles, as it suggests one’s gender identity is a “preference” rather than innate.
Recommended replacement: “Your pronouns, my pronouns, their pronouns, etc.”

Queer (adj.): Once a pejorative term, a term reclaimed and used by some within academic circles
and the LGBTQ community to describe sexual orientations and gender identities that are not
exclusively heterosexual or cisgender. It is a term seen to only be used by community members or
with sincere respect. Not all in the community may be comfortable with this term because of its
historical negative connotation.

Questioning (adj.): A term used to describe people who are in the process of exploring their sexual
orientation or gender identity.

Same-gender loving (adj.): A term coined in the early 1990s by activist Cleo Manago, this term
was and is used by some members of the black community who feel that terms like gay, lesbian and
bisexual (and sometimes the communities therein) are Eurocentric and fail to affirm black culture,
history and identity.

Sex (noun): medical categorization based on the appearance of genitalia / sexual organs. This
physical characteristic is different from gender.

Sexual orientation (noun): An inherent or immutable emotional, romantic or sexual attraction to

other people; oftentimes used to signify the gender identity (or identities) to which a person is most
attracted.

Third gender (noun): A gender identity that is neither male nor female, existing outside the idea
that gender represents a linear spectrum between the two. Sometimes a catchall term or category in
societies, states or countries that legally recognize genders other than male and female.

Transgender (adj.): An umbrella term for people whose gender identity differs from the sex they
were assigned at birth. Not all trans people undergo transition. Being transgender does not imply
any specific sexual orientation. Therefore, transgender people may identify as straight, gay, lesbian,
bisexual or something else. Also, trans.

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Transitioning (verb): A process during which some people strive to more closely align their
gender identity with their gender expression. This includes socially transitioning, during which a
person may change their pronouns, the name they ask to be called or the way they dress to be
socially recognized as another gender. This includes legal transitioning, which may involve an
official name change and modified IDs and birth certificates. And this includes physically
transitioning, during which a person may undergo medical interventions to more closely align their
body to their gender identity. Transgender and nonbinary people transition in various ways to
various degrees; self-identification alone is enough to validate gender identity.

Transphobia (noun): The fear and hatred of, or discomfort with, transgender people. This may
manifest into transphobic actions, such as violence, harassment, misrepresentation or exclusion.

Transsexual (adj.): An offensive and outdated term which refers to people who use medical
interventions such as hormone therapy, gender-affirming surgery (GAS) or sex reassignment
surgery (SRS) as part of the process of expressing their gender. Some people who identify as
transsexual do not identify as transgender and vice versa. Only use this term if someone who
specifically identifies as such asks you to.

Two Spirit (adj.): An umbrella term in Native culture to describe people who have both a male and
female spirit within them. This encompasses many tribe-specific names, roles and traditions, such
as the winkte of the Lakota and nadleeh of the Navajo people. This term often describes Native
people who performed roles and gender expression associated with both men and women. This
term should be used only in the context of Native culture.

Womyn/Womxn (noun): some womyn spell the word with a “y” or an “x” as a form of
empowerment to move away from the “men” in the “traditional” spelling of women

List of terms/phrases deemed OFFENSIVE by the LGBT+ community

Please do NOT use these when talking to or about a person or group of people. This list to make you aware that
they are offensive.
 Cross Dresser
 Dyke
 Fag/Faggot
 He-she
 Homosexual/Homo
 Transsexual
 Transvestite
 “no homo”
 “that’s so gay”
 “did you just assume my gender”—often used as a sarcastic remark

Are there any others that you have heard?

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 LGBTQ+ Flags
Please note: This is not a list of every flag. There are countless others representing the different identities and
groups within the community.

Traditional Gay Pride Flag Pansexual Flag

Philadelphia People of Color-Inclusive

Flag Asexual Flag

Progress Pride Flag Intersex Flag

Bisexual Flag
Transgender Flag

Lesbian Flag

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Genderfluid/Genderflexible Flag Aromantic Flag

Genderqueer Flag Nonbinary Flag

Polysexual Flag Straight Ally Flag

Agender Flag

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Resources for the Training
Star Activity

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Gender Unicorn

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