LEADERSHIP

How Minnesota Nice, conflict and

leadership come together
By Michael A. Gregory, founder, Michael Gregory Consulting, LLC

We’ve all heard of it and, if you’re a Minnesota

native, you’re likely guilty of it. I’m talking about
being “Minnesota Nice.”
For the most part, Minnesota Nice isn’t disruptive
in our day-to-day work. However, as a leader, do
you ever find yourself in a conflict situation where
being Minnesota Nice isn’t so nice?
This question was the inspiration for my
research project. Over a few months, I reached
out to all 42 public Minnesota-headquartered
companies and 15 of the largest privately-owned
headquartered companies in Minnesota. In all,
418 CEOs and senior executives were contacted,
leading to 29 conversations. The initial
questions I asked often turned into 90-minute
conversations about how Minnesota Nice,
conflict in Minnesota-headquartered companies
and leadership come together.
Interestingly, out of all the conversations I had,
there are some overall trends worth noting.
Understanding these elements and best practices
can make us and our clients better leaders.
“Conflict is not
inherently bad. What is Minnesota Nice?
As most know, Minnesota Nice is the stereotypical behavior of people from Minnesota to be courteous,
Rather, how we reserved and mild-mannered. But there is more to this definition, via Wikipedia, for us to consider:
approach conflict “The cultural characteristics of Minnesota Nice include a polite friendliness, an aversion to
confrontation, a tendency toward understatement, a disinclination to make a fuss or stand out,
can be very healthy emotional restraint, and self-deprecation. Critics have pointed out negative qualities, such as passive
or unhealthy.” aggressiveness and resistance to personal change.”
So, perhaps all is not rosy in Lake Wobegon. Although we have learned historically from Garrison
Keillor and “A Prairie Home Companion” that “all the women are strong, all the men are good looking
and all the children are above average,” as a stereotype of Minnesotans, this doesn’t quite fit.

Minnesota Nice in the workplace

When it comes to corporate governance, the bottom line, client satisfaction, employee satisfaction,
leadership, training and opportunity, what role (if any) does Minnesota Nice play?
The following was pointed out and shared with participants related to conflict, civility and engagement,
ahead of my questioning to them.
• America has a civility problem. Sixty-three percent of Americans believe that we have a major civility
problem and 71 percent believe it is getting worse.1
• Research shows that 60–80 percent of all difficulties in organizations stem from strained relationships
between employees, not from deficits in individual employee’s skill or motivation.2
• The typical manager spends 25–40 percent of his or her time dealing with workplace conflicts. That’s
one to two days of every work week.3
• Fortune 500 senior executives spend 20 percent of their time in litigation activities.4
• Fifty-one percent of employees are not engaged at work.5

8 | August 2017
Participants were asked, “In what ways is conflict an issue for you and your organization?” Continue to consider multiple perspectives
Overall, Minnesota leaders had this to say: These are some of the key elements
regarding Minnesota Nice, conflict and
• Negative conflict is not a serious issue. As a whole, open negative conflict can be very leadership, along with some best practices
traumatic, but it’s not typical. for consideration. We may not be at Lake
• Organizations take annual surveys and discuss them. Executives break down questions Wobegon, and we do have our faults, but
into teams of six with parties that have ownership on issues, and have them work difficult we are also a can-do workforce that is made
tasks together. This helps diffuse negative conflict and helps small groups to come to a up of hardworking folks who bring elements
resolution that is workable. The small groups are able to tackle issues with real energy. of compassion, caring and consideration
• Naturally, there are conflicts with one another when working together 40-plus hours a along with the bottom line. It is important
week. The keys are developing relationships personally, listening to one another, asking that we continue to understand multiple
questions, and listening to what is and isn’t being said. It’s so important to get to know perspectives, address conflict and enhance
everyone on the team and address minor areas of conflict before they grow into major our effectiveness in our competitive and
areas of conflict. diverse world. „
• It is important to stay focused on what we can control, be humane, build trust,
demonstrate compassion and be as transparent as possible. Mike Gregory is the
founder of Michael
Healthy approaches to conflict Gregory Consulting, LLC,
Conflict is not inherently bad. Rather, how we approach conflict can be very healthy or a firm that helps
unhealthy. The following themes and conclusions emerged from my conversations with organizations understand
Minnesota executives about how effective leaders address conflict. multiple perspectives,
An overwhelming majority of those interviewed believe that employees want to do a good address conflict and
job. Therefore, leadership needs to be open and honest with all employees to help them negotiate winning
achieve greatness. Overall, there is a genuine interest in doing this with each other to come solutions. You may reach him at
up with reasonable solutions. mg@mikegreg.com or 651-633-5311.
Several respondents shared about coming into situations where fear was a major concern.
That can be crippling. It’s important that leaders not let their fears, real or imaginary,
prevent them from helping employees become a better team. Everyone makes mistakes. Leaders aren’t born —
When they are made, leaders need to create an environment that allows for openness,
they’re trained
honesty and learning. Rather than use feedback, use “feed-forward.” Feed-forward means
giving people suggestions for the future. This demonstrates that you are there to help. Gain practical leadership and conflict
Leaders need to be there to help. resolution guidance with these programs.
Visit www.mncpa.org/cpe for details
Some leaders were concerned there was not enough conflict, and that parts of the
and registration.
organization were too comfortable in their own silos. Collaboration is at its best when
there is spirited debate. Otherwise, the team won’t consider different perspectives or think Communication Miracles at Work: How
outside of the box. to Increase Cooperation and Decrease
Some of the companies I contacted have highly-tenured employees who know each other Conflict (Webinar)
very well and understand the norms of their organizations. They have learned how to Sept. 6 (WA310175)
avoid conflict with one another. This may be related to Minnesota Nice and what critics 4 CPE | Online
have pointed out as negative qualities, such as passive aggressiveness and resistance to
personal change. If this is the workplace’s culture, being direct is not always looked upon Have the Difficult Conversation You’ve
favorably. This tended to be a minority of subjects interviewed, but it’s definitely there and Been Dreading (Webinar)
is something to be aware of in particular with the more seasoned workforce that has not Sept. 18 (WX8451)
necessarily have had to address major change. With the anticipation of succession planning, 2 CPE | Online
this needs to be addressed or new hires may be only short lived in this environment.
Personal Leadership Skills (Webinar)
Overall, punishment was not an option. Rather, promoting positive interactions is the way Sept. 20 (WA317194)
of the future. If someone is toxic, that needs to be addressed. 4 CPE | Online
1
Civility in America - Weber Shandwick 2013 NEW! Leadership Improv: Why “Fake It
2
Daniel Dana, “Managing Differences: How to Build Better Relationships at Work and Home” Until You Make It” Works
(2005, 4th ed.); Barbara J. Kreisman, “Insights into Employee Motivation, Commitment and Nov. 29 (IMPROV)
Retention” (2002). 8 CPE
3
Washington Business Journal, May 2005. MNCPA, Bloomington
4
Mediate.com.
5
Gallup.com 2015

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