Miss Nelson is Missing By Harry Allard

(MN=Miss Nelson; MVS=Miss Viola Swamp)

Kid 1: Our teacher was Miss Nelson. But we were not very nice to her.

Kid 2: We wiggled, (其他人表演)

Kid 3: and giggled. (其他人表演)

Kid 4: We make funny faces. (Kid 1-4 接龍做出鬼臉)

Kid 1:.We shot spitballs on the ceiling.

Kid 2: We do airplanes. (說完後 Kid 1-4 同時射出紙飛機)

Kid 3: We do not do our lessons.

Kid 4: We were very very bad. (口氣誇張狀,邪惡的眼神,像流氓)

MN: Settle down, class. It’s time for lesson. (溫柔的口吻, 一點都不權威)

Kid 1-4 : Oh…… (不情願狀, 全班都不想上課)

MN: We have to do these. Please pay attention.(翻白眼, 很無奈的表情)

Kid 1: I want to go to the bathroom.

Kid 2: Peter kicked me.

Kid 3: Miss Nelson, Anna doesn’t want to be my friend.

Kid 4: I am bored.

Kid 1: I want to play dodge ball.

Kid 2: I am thirsty.
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Kid 3: I am tired.

Kid 4: I want to go home.

MN: (歇斯底里地大喊) Class! Why can’t you treat me with respect?

Kid 1+2: Because we are not your friends.(說完用紙球丟老師)

MN: (很生氣地下定決心) Something will have to be done!

Kid 3: At first, we were very happy.

Kid 4: We had no idea what was coming.

Kid 1:.The next morning,

Kid 2: Miss Nelson did not come to school.

Kid 1-4 : Yeah!

Kid 3: Now we can really act up!

Kid 4: Let’s have a party!

(低沉粗糙的聲音, A woman in an ugly black dress stood before them.)

MVS: NOT SO FAST!

Kid 1: Who are you?

MVS: I am your new teacher, MISS VIOLA SWAMP!(放慢速度加強語氣)

Kid 2: Where’s Miss Nelson?

MVS: Never mind that! I am your new teacher NOW.

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Kid 3: But,

MVS: But nothing. ( 很兇) BE QUIET! (強而有力) SIT STILL!

If you misbehave, you will be sorry. (威脅恐嚇)

Kid 4: What are you gonna do to us? (恐懼狀)

MVS: (邪惡的眼神跟口吻) Fasten your seat belts and do as you are told.

穿插表演一些課堂帶讀的片段

撕破字跡潦草的功課

動不動就拿棍子敲打桌子很暴力 (或者改成用皮帶或皮鞭)

MVS: In my class, there will be new rules. 皮鞭抽一下, Kids1-4 就嚇一次

If I catch you making spitballs, oh, how sorry you will be.

　　　　　(皮鞭抽一下, Kids1-4 就嚇一次)

You will be wise to obey. (威脅恐嚇)

Kid 1: Miss Viola Swamp is a real witch.

Kid 2: She loaded us with homework every night.

Kid 3: It was too much.

Kid 4: I miss Miss Nelson.

Kid 1-4 : Me, too. We want her back.

Kid 1: So we went to the police.

Police:（咳兩聲）What can I help you?

Kid 2: Our teacher, Miss Nelson did not come to school. (焦急狀)
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Police: Go on. (淡定的說)

Kid 3: We don’t know what happened.

Police: That’s interesting.

Kid 4: She disappeared. (快哭出來了)

Police:　I see.

Kid 1-4 : We have to find her.

Police: I know what is going on. (有自信, 故作玄虛)

Kid 1-4 :　表演出很期待 Police 的判定結果

Police: I think Miss Nelson is missing.

Kid 1-4 :　表演出很失望,　被烏龍警察給打敗

Kid 1:　We are frustrated,

Kid 2: miserable,

Kid 3: and desperate.

Kid 1: Miss Nelson is never coming back.

Kid 2: Not ever.

Kid 3: It’s all our fault. (以上皆以沒有希望, 懊惱後悔的語氣表演)

Kid 4: Wait, you guys. Let’s go to her house and do something nice for her.

Kid 2: We can show her how good we will be.

Kid 3: Show our respect.

Kid 1: Maybe Miss Nelson will give us another chance. 眼神露出一線生機希望

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Kid 2: (敲門) Hello, is anybody home?

Kid 3: Miss Nelson, are you home?

Kid 4: She is not here.

Kid 1: Maybe something terrible happened to her.

Kid 2:.Maybe she was gobbled up by a shark.

Kid 3: I know Miss Nelson went to Mars.

Kid 4: Here comes Miss Viola Swamp!　(驚慌狀)

Kid 1:Let’s get out of here, or she will give us more homework.

Kid 2: I don’t like Miss Viola Swamp. She is not like Miss Nelson.

Kid 3: I wish Miss Nelson could be here with me tomorrow.

MN: Hello children. Did you miss me?

Kid 1+ 2: We certainly did!

Kid 4: Where were you?

MN: That’s my little secret. How about story time?

Kid 1-4: Oh, yes! (興奮狀)

MN: What brought about this lovely change?

Kid 1-4: That’s our little secret.

MN: I have a secret, too. But I’ll never tell!