Final Version Report For Brightspace

Running Head: THE JOURNEY TO YOUR INNER HERO
The Journey to Your Inner Hero
Dané Kruyver, Vanessa M. Dietzschold, Bart Koopman, Lisa Norbiato,
Whitney West & Katharina Mai
Amsterdam University of Applied Sciences (HvA)
Positive Psychology
A JOURNEY TO YOUR INNER HERO 2
Content
Introduction 3
Explanation of PERMA and Relationships/meaning (Why we chose them) 5
The connection between the relationship with oneself and the relationship with others 9
How to strengthen the relationship with yourself? 13
Love and kindness meditation 13
Self-forgiveness 14
Self-talk 16
Conclusion 18
About the intervention 21
Chapter 1: Call to Adventure 23
Chapter 2: Meeting with the mentor 24
Chapter 3: Refusal of the Call 24
Chapter 4: Allies and Enemies 25
Chapter 5: Facing Yourself 25
Chapter 6: The Reward 26
Chapter 7: Remember the journey (Totem) 26
Used Literature 27
Introduction
This report will lay out the theoretical foundation of our research along with the
intervention we have designed for this minor in Positive Psychology. Beginning with an
explanation of the five PERMA pillars and narrowing down to the two we chose. An analysis
of the importance of the relationship with the self and how it’s a prerequisite for the
relationship with others is followed by several proven psychological interventions focused on
strengthening one’s relationship with oneself. Eventually, we will conclude our research
before moving on to the intervention design and script.
Out of the 5 interconnected PERMA pillars in positive psychology, our project team
chose Relationship as a main pillar and Meaning as a supporting one. The Relationship pillar
constitutes any healthy social connections one is surrounded by. Human beings are
fundamentally social beings, since social psychologist and neuroscientist; Matthew
Lieberman discovered that our brain’s default ‘setting’ is occupied with social thoughts
(Lieberman, 2013). While the Meaning pillar stresses on the question of why one is living the
life one is in, the purposeful life (Seligman, 2011). Providing the framework to understand
why certain social connections are more meaningful than others can be a liberating
experience, especially in a digital age where social connections are virtually abundant.
Through the experience of living in self-quarantine conditions amidst the COVID-19
pandemic in 2020, we discovered the opportunity for solitude amidst social isolation. It
brought to light how positive or negative the people around us can be for our own well-being,
at the same time encouraging us to reach out to those physically distant but close to our
hearts. This collective experience inspired the realization that in the pursuit of healthy
relationships, one needs to master self-understanding. People who rate their relationships of
high quality tend to not only experience autonomy but support the other for pursuing it (Deci
& Ryan, 2014). Maintaining relationships often involve treating the other with kindness and
compassion, while treating the self in the same manner is often left out of the process
(Carter-Scott, 2000; Friedman, 1985). While the concept of self-love could be misinterpreted
as a narcissistic endeavour, we view it from the perspective of philosopher Paul Tillich who
posits that being in solitude would be a gateway to kinship (Tillich, 1963; Spezzano, 1994).
The project team aims to achieve two goals with “the Journey to Your Inner Hero”
intervention. Practically, we aim to empower our target audience with self-led practical tools.
In addition, our overall aim is to assist them to cultivate a relationship with the self in order to
develop well-being and healthy relationships with others. This main goal links explicitly with
our main pillar, relationship and implicitly with our supporting pillar, meaning. Developing
one’s relationship with the self-focuses on creating a foundation for social relationships to
flourish from. Prioritizing self-understanding while developing one’s social circle, provides a
platform for meaningful relationships.
Although any adult above the age of 20 can use the intervention, our target audience
consists of students and fresh graduates in the age of 20-30 years with an interest in
self-development. We choose this audience because we took ourselves as a reference point
while creating the workshop. Although we set this target group we want to emphasize that this
workbook is dedicated to everyone who is curious and interested. The participants do not need
to be an expert on reflecting, mediating or wiring to complete this workbook. We simply want
to offer an opportunity to cultivate the relationship with oneself in order to improve one’s
well-being, as well as to nourish the relationships with others. Age, gender, nationality or
sexuality are of no relevance.

Explanation of PERMA and Relationships/meaning (Why we chose them)
PERMA is an acronym that is used to describe a scientific theory of happiness created
by the researcher Martin Seligman. His goal was to help individuals live a more fulfilling and
happy life. PERMA contains five different patterns that all contribute to one’s well-being.
Each pillar is equally as important in the contribution to the theory (Seligman, 2011). The five
pillars of PERMA stand for Positive Emotions, Engagement, Relationships, Meaning, and
Achievement. Each pillar is equally important to come together with to maximize happiness.
The specific pillar of PERMA we decided to focus on is the Relationship pillar with an
emphasis on Meaning.
The first pillar in PERMA’s scientific theory for happiness is Positive Emotions. The
Positive Emotions pillar of PERMA focuses on experiencing positivity and happiness in
various ways, also called the “pleasant life” (Seligman, 2011). Hedonism can also be used to
describe this urge, which is striving us to live a life with a maximum of pleasure and a
minimum of discomfort. This aim applies to simple and complex situations. Having a positive
viewpoint can massively assist during the development of relationships and in work scenarios.
Throughout one’s life there are many expected and unexpected situations that are going to be
out of one’s control. Focusing on the negatives has been linked to having a higher chance of
depression (Pascha, 2020). Moreover, research has shown that experiencing positive emotions
can help to broaden up your mindset, which is connected to personal growth (Fredrickson,
2009, p.54 et seq.). Despite all these benefits, the pleasant life is a subjective measure and not
the goal or the centrepiece of Seligman’s well-being theory (Seligman, 2011).
The second pillar of PERMA’s scientific theory for happiness is Engagement.
Everyone has different interests and hobbies. Figuring out an activity that sparks a specific
attentiveness creates an engagement. “Activities that meet our need for engagement flood the
body with positive neurotransmitters and hormones that elevate one’s sense of well-being”
(Pascha, 2020). When we find activities that properly engage us we enter a flow. Flow
absorbs and immerses ourselves into the activity at hand causing us to get lost in the moment.
Flow is associated with feelings of blissfulness and happiness. In a busy life there are several
things fighting to keep our attention. Activities such as surfing, reading, traveling, etc. can
create an engaging concentration in order to ground us from a hectic attention span.
The third pillar of PERMA’s scientific theory for happiness is Relationships. The
relationships pillar focuses on the importance of relationships in one’s life and the
contribution towards one's well-being. In order to have successful and healthy relationships
with others one must first have a healthy relationship with themselves. This includes things
like having positive self-talk, healthy habits, and having goals and boundaries. Many people
have the common misconception that the proper life journey is an individual story. The
PERMA model emphasizes the importance of having strong and meaningful relationships in
one’s life. Meaningful relationships in one’s life lead to a happier and healthier life,
successful aging, supporting recovery from mental illness and friendships at work lead to
increased performance. They are also the key ways in identifying traits like; social
intelligence, empathy, listening, emotional awareness, authenticity, self-regulation, kindness,
gratitude, and motivation. “Relationship Motivation Theory (RMT) posits a basic
psychological need for relatedness that mobilizes people to pursue relationships, yet not all
relationships are of high quality and satisfy the relatedness need” (Deci & Ryan, 2014).
Humans are naturally social creatures, because of this it is important to recognize the
relationships in one’s life where there are not any positive or beneficial aspects. There are a
couple different ways to be able to recognize the good and the bad relationships in one’s life.
Recognizing which relationships are beneficial and which relationships are decreasing one’s
personal development is vital. “Relationships are hard because they work as mirrors. We are
constantly confronted with an aspect of ourselves that we don’t like and which we are forced
to accept and work on” (Iachia, 2019). Having a strong personal relationship with oneself is a
key factor in having successful relationships with others. The key to healthy and profound
relationships is also taking responsibility for our own feelings. The reason we picked the
Relationship pillar of PERMA is because many people are under the perception that the
journey through life is a singular experience. Although true on a perspective level, in order to
have high levels of satisfaction and well-being in life one must have meaningful relationships.
Having satisfactory relationships in one's life also leads to positive health associations. “Both
a theoretical basis and strong empirical evidence for a causal impact of social relationships on
health” (House, Landis & Umberson, 1988, p.544) There is also an increased risk of death
among persons with a low quantity, and sometimes low quality, of social relationships while
social isolation is known for being a major risk factor for a mortality of widely varying
causes. A study done at Harvard Study of Adult Development in Boston, Massachusetts tested
what makes a good life. The results show that good relationships keep us happier and
healthier whereas lonely people die earlier, are less happy and have a decline in health and
brain functions sooner. Trusting each other and the feeling that one can count on one another
keeps the memory sharp for a longer period of time (Waldinger, n.d.).
The fourth pillar of PERMA’s scientific theory for happiness is Meaning. Meaning
focuses on general questions such as, “What is my purpose?” “Why am I here?” and “What
am I supposed to be doing?”. Meaning, along with Positive Emotions, is subjective to every
individual. Everyone finds meaning in different ways. Some find answers to their search for
meaning through spirituality or religion. Others find meaning in raising a family, having a
good job, working towards a greater cause, or finding creative outlets. Having meaningful
relationships in one’s life is also largely associated with feelings of meaning.
The last pillar of PERMA’s scientific theory for happiness stands for Achievement.
“Having goals and ambition in life can help us to achieve things that can give us a sense of
accomplishment” (Pascha, 2020). It is important to be continuously working towards short
term and long-term goals or else one could find themselves in the trap of becoming too
comfortable. There can be several different contexts and levels to achievement in one’s life.
One can find achievement in school, work, or a personal goal. Having ambitions allows one to
find meaning and to constantly be progressing. It is also important that the goals one sets out
to achieve are realistic and practical in order to feel a sense of accomplishment and
satisfaction when achieving the said goals.
The scientific theory for happiness, PERMA, has five different pillars that all equally
contribute to the theory. Out of the five pillars we decided to focus on Relationships and more
specifically, the relationships with one’s self in order to improve relationships with others.
The connection between the relationship with oneself and the relationship with others
“You need to love yourself in order to love others” or “the most important relationship
that you will ever have is the one with yourself” are sentences that probably all of us have
heard at least once in our lives. How much truth really lies within these sayings is going to be
discussed in the following chapter.
Referring to the literature, self-esteem is often used to describe the relationship with
oneself. Furthermore, self-esteem is a concept that pictures a person’s attitude towards, or
evaluation of, her- or himself (Abdel-Khalek, 2016). In other words it shows how much we
value and respect ourselves, which is the reason why we think that self-esteem is one good
presenter of the relationship that we have with ourselves.
As described in the literature, there are two interesting theories that are coping with the
question why self-esteem exists.
According to “The Terror-Management-Theory '' (Greenberg, Pyszczynski, &
Solomon, 1986, p. 202) the sense of personal value is achieved by believing in one’s cultural
worldview and its validity. By living up to the standards that are part of this worldview one
feels as a valuable contributor to a meaningful world (Becker, 1973) and as a result,
self-esteem is seen as a trust in a humanly created worldview with the social role one plays
within it. These confidants act as a shield against the deeply rooted fear of death
(Pyszczynski, Greenberg, Solomon, Arndt, & Schimel, 2004, p.463). Hence, the
Terror-Management-Theory understands self-esteem as a cultural and social construct, which
suggests that other people are necessary to maintain it as well as to keep up the faith in one’s
cultural worldview and person. Whenever people disagree with one’s ideas it threatens to
undermine this confidence and faith (Swann, 1987, p. 1048). To conclude, it can be said that
according to the Terror-Management-Theory, self-esteem is a construct that seeks and
depends on the validation of others while it’s acting as a buffer against human fears.
The second theory is “the Sociometer theory” (Leary & Baumeister, 2000) which
argues that self-esteem depends on the level of social approval and acceptance towards
oneself. As a consequence an increase of self-esteem is associated with the loss of social
bonds, as well as with social exclusion.
Overall, both theories agree on the idea that self-esteem is fundamental for the social
existence of human beings. Furthermore, self-esteem can be understood as an instrument,
which is based on the urgency of creating social bonds with no end in itself (Bierhoff, 2006).
How much for instance social exclusion affects people and the picture they have about
themselves has been shown in four studies that were published in the Journal of Experimental
Social Psychology in 2009. The studies have shown that loneliness and social exclusion
reduce the perception of one's life as meaningful. Moreover, a meaningful life is constructed
from value, efficacy, purpose and self-worth. These parameters decrease when people see
their lives as less meaningful. In conclusion, it can be said that social relationships are directly
linked to the picture that we have regarding self-esteem and the way we feel about ourselves
as well as to the meaning that we give to our lives (Stillman et al., 2009).
Not only does self-esteem act as a fundament of our social behaviour, but it also
contributes to our overall well-being. It makes us feel more efficient and gives us the ability to
cope with difficulties, failures and setbacks more successfully, as it helps us to engage in
difficult activities (Carver & Scheier, 1981, 1998). Furthermore, self-esteem is connected to
maintaining a strong connection in romantic relationships, especially during difficult times
(Murray et al., 2006). Despite all these benefits, it has been shown that when it comes to
relationships low self-esteem (CMHC) as well as a very high self-esteem (especially
narcissism) seem largely detrimental (Campbell & Baumeister, 2004).
Thus, balance is the key when it comes to maintaining healthy relationships. According to
McKay self-compassion is the essence of healthy self-esteem (McKay, 2000). Compared to
self-esteem, which pretty much concentrates on our social environment, self-compassion
however faces inwards.
Just as we act out of compassion towards others self-compassion brings our awareness
to our own pain and asks us to face it as well as to answer it with kindness. Compassion to
ourselves cannot exist when we judge ourselves for failures or when we try to avoid our
feelings (Neff, 2003). Referring to Kristin Neff, self-compassion is defined by three
components: The first one is to act out of self-kindness as well as to understand your own
suffering and failing. The second component is avoiding seeing yourself isolated from the
commonly human experience as a group. Being aware and mindful over one's feelings rather
than to identify with them is the third and last component of self-compassion. Having a kind
attitude towards oneself affects the overall psychological well-being in a positive way (Neff,
2003). By giving us the tools that make us understand, accept and forgive ourselves,
self-compassion has an extremely beneficial influence on ourselves (McKay, 2000).
According to research, it also affects the relationships towards others in a positive way.
Studies have shown that self-compassion is linked to healthy romantic relationships as well as
higher relational well-being, which is associated with the feeling of appreciation and
happiness. Moreover, the partners were more able to talk openly and authenticity about their
opinions regarding their relationship, which also contributes to a greater well-being (Neff &
Beretvas, 2012). Despite that, people with a high sense of self-compassion are more caring
and could relate to their partners on a higher level. This suggests the assumption that intimacy
with others might be linked to the open and kind attitude towards oneself. Furthermore, it was
shown that people with self-compassion are more likely to accept their partners as well as to
give them more freedom and time to fully fill their own needs. It is suspected that accepting
one's own failures might make us more understanding of the imperfections of our partners
(Neff & Beretvas, 2012). Also when it comes to conflicts people with a high self-compassion
are solving it in a more sustainable way by finding a balance between the needs of oneself and
their partners, their family’s or their friends. Moreover, people with higher self-compassion
are more likely to compromise during a fight than people with low self-compassion, which is
linked to the assumption that the acceptance about one’s own world of feelings provides an
emotional stable base that gives security during emotionally charged disputes (Yarnell &
Neff, 2013). Is that solid emotional base missing, people tend to have a lower self-compassion
which is suspected to block intimacy in relationships and make people more controlling over
their partners (Neff & Beretvas, 2012). To conclude it can be said that being a good friend to
oneself makes us a better friend, partner or simply a better person towards others and in
general.
How to strengthen the relationship with yourself?
Nowadays there are lots of self-help books available with the purpose to help you
strengthen the relationship with yourself. Each book suggests their own best practices,
exercises and activities that could potentially lead to improvement to a greater or lesser extent.
But which ones are the most effective? According to modern day research the following
exercises, techniques or practices turn out to be very effective in strengthening the
relationship with yourself.
Love and kindness meditation
The first practice that has proven its worth is a specific form of meditation. The love
and kindness meditation (LKM). This type of meditation is often used to increase feelings of
warmth and caring for self and others (Salzberg, 1995). Just as with other forms of
meditation, LKM also involves silently contemplating in a seated posture with closed eyes
and a focus on the breath. However, where mindfulness meditation focuses on training you to
be aware of the present moment with a non judging attitude, LKM focuses on directing your
emotion toward warm and kind feelings in an open hearted way (Fredrickson, Cohn, Coffey,
Pek, & Finkel, 2008, pp. 3). Studies about the effects of Love and kindness meditation have
shown a significant increase in positive emotions and subsequent building of personal
resources (Hefferon & Boniwell, 2011, pp. 169). So creating a loving and kind attitude
towards others has also very positive effects on the relationship with yourself.
Although the order wherein they are being used change with each meditation teacher,
the following 5 elements are always present in the meditation. Having loving and kind
thoughts toward:
● A loved one;
● Someone you feel neutral about;
● Someone you feel hard to be with or even hate;
● All living beings on this planet or the entire universe;
● Yourself;
A typical LKM usually starts with getting in the right state of mind and then repeat with one
of the elements in your mind and the fullest intent in your heart the following sentences:
● May …. be free from suffering
● May … be as happy and healthy as it is possible for …. to be.
● May…. have/has ease of being.
(Williams & Penman, 2011)
Self-forgiveness
Another practice that can be used to strengthen the relationship with yourself is called
Ho‘oponopono. It’s based on the concept of forgiveness and has existed in the Hawaiian
culture for hundreds of years. According to research, practicing Ho’oponopono leads to a
statistically significant reduction in unforgiveness (James, 2008). That’s important because
high levels of unforgiveness and especially self-unforgiveness are associated with poorer
mental health and higher life dissatisfaction. I.e. People with a high level of
self-unforgiveness experience more negative emotions as shame, anger and anxiety whereas
and are more avoidant, vengeful and less benevolent toward people who have hurt them
(McCullough, Root & Cohen, 2006; Macaskill, 2012).
Just like the LKM, Ho’oponopono has indirect positive effects on the self by focusing on
others. One explanation of why focusing on the other works so well could be found in the fact
that most Individuals tend to judge themselves much harsher with more rigid criteria than they
judge other people. They judge other people with much more understanding and with more
sympathy for their failures (Beck, 1961). Therefore it’s easier for people to start the creation
of a forgiving attitude by forgiving other people then to start by forgiving yourself.
There are numerous ways and variations of practicing Ho‘oponopono. However, they
all involves some variation of the following mantra for forgiveness (Seiler, 2019):
I am sorry
This sentence has a goal that you accept the situation and take full responsibility for this
situation.
Please forgive me
This sentence causes you to open up yourself and accept your vulnerability and eventually
forgive yourself.
Thank you
This sentence causes you to thank the person you want to forgive for the lesson that they
taught you. It helps accept this person and give room for imperfection.
I love you
This sentence has the goal of letting go all the negativity and anger. It invites gratitude and
love into your heart so you can grow from the lesson that you have learned.
Self-talk
Self-Talk is the personal inner voice that everybody has which talks to you from the moment
you are awake till the moment you fall asleep. This inner voice combines conscious thoughts
with unconscious beliefs and enables the brain to interpret and process daily experiences
effectively. Self-Talk can be very useful when the voice is positive. It may help to reduce
fears or gain confidence. When self-talk is negative however, it has the potential to paralyze
people into inaction and self-absorption (Psychology Today, n.d.).
Negative self-talk can fall in 4 categories (Mead, 2019):
1. Personalizing: When things go wrong, you blame yourself.
2. Polarizing: You see things only as black/white or as good/bad. There are no grey
areas or a middle ground.
3. Magnifying: In a scenario you only focus on the bad or negative and dismiss anything
that’s good or positive.
4. Catastrophizing: Always expecting the worst.
Negative self-talk can lead to a decreased motivation, heightened stress, limited
thinking, perfectionism, feelings of depression and a negative effect on someone's success
(Scott, 2020). Positive self-talk however, according to research leads to less anxiety, higher
self-confidence, higher self-optimization, more self-efficacy and greater performance (Walter,
Nikoleizig & Alfermann, 2019).
In order to change negative self-talk into positive self-talk, the first step is categorizing
each negative self-talk thought you have in one of the 4 categories (Personalizing, Polarizing,
Magnifying, Catastrophizing). So the first step is about awareness of the negative self-talk.
Strategies you can use to achieve this awareness are identifying self-talk traps, utilizing
positive affirmations, regularly checking in with your emotions and not being afraid of
creating boundaries. When the awareness is there, there are many exercises you can do to
improve your self-talk (Mead, 2019).

Conclusion
We can conclude that a meaningful relationship is important for one’s well-being. This
includes a relationship with others but also with oneself.
The theoretical framework of the intervention is linked to PERMA, which is a theory created
by Martin Seligman. It stands for five pillars that represent a concept of overall well-being.
The five pillars are: positive emotions, engagement, relationships, meaning and achievement.
The workshop focuses on the relationships pillar since a deep connection with others are
highly beneficial for one’s well-being.
Relationships work as a mirror; if you do not have a good relationship with yourself
you won’t be able to make a deep connection with others. We decided to focus on this pillar
because most people believe that life is about individuality. Nevertheless, studies have proven
that if one wants to have a fulfilling life, meaningful relationships are essential. Higher life
satisfactions as well as physical and mental health are connected with these findings.
The intervention will also be based on the pillar ‘Meaning’. Since, a lot of people find
meaning in maintaining strong bonds with others. One goal of the intervention is to make the
participants realise how much meaning they can find in the relationships with themselves and
others.
An important aspect when it comes to relationships is self-esteem. A healthy
self-esteem is fundamental in building meaningful connections. There are two theories to
underline this. Firstly, the Terror Management theory shows how the sense of personal value
is achieved by believing in one’s cultural worldview and its validity.
Secondly, the Sociometer theory points out that self-esteem depends on the level of
social approval and acceptance towards oneself. Thus, a low self-esteem is connected with
less meaningful relationships and one has to aim for a balanced self-esteem to maintain
healthy and happy relationships.
Another essential aspect of deeper connections is self-compassion. This aspect is about-facing
inwards instead of outwards. Self-compassion consists of three components:
1. Act out of self-kindness as well as to understand your own suffering and failing
2. Avoiding seeing yourself isolated from a group
3. Being aware and mindful over one’s feelings rather than to identify them
Self-compassion is connected to the feelings of appreciation and happiness, which can
also lead to healthy romantic relationships. People who have a higher level of self-compassion
tend to be more open and caring. Moreover, they are confident enough to give their partner
space and this leads to more meaningful relationships.
There are several ways to strengthen the relationship with yourself. Therefore we suggest
these three interventions:
1. Love and kindness meditation
2. Self-forgiveness
3. Self-talk
LKM is a meditation form based on the emotion ‘love’. During the meditation, one
pictures a loved one in their mind and directs their kind thoughts to them. It’s also possible to
focus on yourself or all living beings on this planet. Studies have shown that these warm
heartfelt thoughts increase positive emotions and create a growth of personal resources.
Self-forgiveness can be practiced with a Hawaiian ancient ritual of forgiveness:
Ho‘oponopono. According to research it seems that self-unforgivingness leads to a poorer

mental health and to more negative emotions such as shame, that will not only affect one self
but also one’s relationships in a negative way.
Lastly, self-talk is a significant tool that can be used while working on strengthening
the relationship with oneself. For instance, can a very critical inner voice lead to an increase
of anxiety and a lack of self-confidence. This personal inner voice affects one's daily
experience and can be very useful when it’s positive. In order to improve self-talk one has to
become aware, utilize positive affirmations, regularly check in with their emotions and not be
afraid of creating boundaries.

About the intervention
We decided to create a journey towards self-compassion and deeper connections for
our participants. With this intervention we strive to empower our target audience with self-led
practical tools and try to assist the target audience to cultivate a relationship with the self in
order to develop well-being and healthy relationships with others.
Although it is sad that we do not have the chance to host a workshop in person we
wanted to take advantage of the extraordinary circumstances we find ourselves in these days.
The intervention that we created is easily available online and can be done flexible in
everyone’s personal pace. As mentioned before, our intervention is called Journey to Your
Inner Hero and consists of a workbook comprising 7 chapters. This workbook is designed as
a journey of positive self-relationship. Each chapter begins with a description of the
intervention and scientific reasoning behind it, which leads to the step-by-step explanation on
how to do the intervention.
Our intervention will be housed on a website, along with guidance videos and a social
forum. The videos will supplement each chapter of the workbook with a visual explanation
and some chapters also include a guided meditation. There will be an on-boarding period, in
which participants will have a time limit to begin the self-relationship journey of 14 days.
This way there will be a pool of people going through the same journey at the same time,
building an environment to experience the sense of common humanity (Neff, n.d).
As this intervention will be completely self-led, we embedded elements within the
workbook to encourage self-regulation. It is important that participants are given practical
pointers throughout the workbook in order to maintain their commitment to the intervention.
There are four factors that contribute to self-regulation, a well-defined standard, ability to
monitor progress, willpower, and a motivation to reach the goal (Hefferon and Boniwell,
2011, p. 157).
These factors have been implemented throughout the workbook in creative ways.
Standards are defined by providing an explanation of the intervention and the purpose at the
beginning and end of the workbook. Participants may monitor their own progress by using the
provided journey log-book to keep track in a positive and rewarding format by ticking the
checkbox next to the completed chapter. Motivation is facilitated by giving the opportunity at
the beginning of the intervention to set a personal goal that is focused on the relationship
theme, approach oriented and not to increase power over another (Emmons, 2003). Finally,
willpower depletion is countered by referring participants to the motivational goal and the
private and safe social forum we created for this intervention. This is referred throughout the
chapters especially the concluding message placed at the footer of every chapter.
The intervention is based on the Hero’s journey from the book “The Writer's journey”
of Christopher Vogler (Vogler, 2007). In a couple of steps the participants will connect to
their inner ‘hero’ by doing several exercises related to knowing themselves and to strengthen
their relationships. There will be seven chapters on this journey to their inner hero:
1. Call to Adventure
2. Meeting with the mentor
3. Refusal of the Call
4. Allies and Enemies
5. Facing Yourself
6. The Reward
7. Remember the journey (Totem)
The videos as well as the several exercises in the workbook are available online on our
website (https://journeytoyourinnerhero.weebly.com/) and can be downloaded beforehand. In
order to make our vision of a journey more tangible we decided to call the chapters “stops”
and the videos “location guide videos”. The changes in the names apply to both, the website
and the workbook.
As mentioned before our target group ranges from age 20 to 30 that makes it easy for
us to find participants within our own circle of friends and acquaintances. Our goal is to find
15 workshop participants. Once we have reached that number we are going to contact each
one of them via email and send them a detailed description of the workshop as well as the link
to the website.
To provide an optimal support during the two weeks we are going to be available via
email (Journeytoyourinnerhero@gmail.com) and on our Facebook community
(https://www.facebook.com/groups/2071839052959510/), where we will happily answer all
the questions that might come up. Moreover, we hope that the Facebook group is going to
become a platform for exchange.
After the participants completed the workshop they will be asked to fill out a survey,
which will include the following three questions:
1. Which country do you reside?
2. What is the most important thing you learned about yourself from doing the
workbook?
3. What did you feel was missing?
4. Would you recommend it to a friend?

The survey can be found on the website and offers us the possibility to optimize the workshop
as well as it is an opportunity for us to receive feedback.
Chapter 1: Call to Adventure
→ approx. 1h
The first chapter of the workbook offers the participants an option to learn something
about their strengths. In order to provide an empowering start, the goal is to show them what
sources of power and good are already within them. Therefore, the participants have to take a
strengths test online, which will give them their top 3 strengths.
In the second part of the chapter these strengths are complemented with the strengths
that those who are close to the participants can identify. In a last step the participants will
draw a mind map out of all their strengths.
Chapter 2: Meeting with the mentor
→ approx. 1h
After responding to the call to Adventure, they’re going to get in touch with a mentor.
This is a representation of someone they admire. The goal of this chapter is to find a mentor
that can help overcoming one’s initial fears, self-doubts along the hero journey. The
participants are free to choose a mentor all by themselves, it can be represented by a book, a
person or an object (etc.). The only thing that is mandatory is that the participants can relate in
some way with their mentor, therefore they will have to answer questions about the character
they chose and the specific journey the character went through in the characters story and how
they can relate it to their own lives. This is connected with findings that suggest that “high
self-esteem does lead to improvements in a person’s social relationships and in all

developmental stages across the life-span, reflecting a positive feedback loop between the
constructs” (Harris & Orth, 2019).
Chapter 3: Refusal of the Call
→ approx. 50 min
The goal of this chapter is to teach the participants how they can face and erase fears,
insecurities and self-doubt through visualisation of the things that are holding them back. In
the first step of this chapter a questionnaire will help the participants to reflect on these
particular negative things as well as it is meant to raise awareness to possible
self-unforgiveness.
In the second part of the third chapter the participant will learn how to use the
“Ho’oponopono” visualization in order to let go of everything that is keeping them from
flourishing to their full potential.
Chapter 4: Allies and Enemies
→ approx. 3h
In this chapter the participants will meet their allies and enemies. The goal of this
chapter is to teach the participants how to deal with their negative self-talk so they have a tool
to change their enemy into an ally. After the change, the participant will learn how to treat
their new ally (themselves) in a positive way by savouring the benefits of love and kindness
through Love and kindness meditation.
Chapter 5: Facing Yourself
→ approx. 2h
After experiencing self-forgiveness and self-compassion the participants will be given
a first positive treat in the form of experiencing positive emotions. This chapter is all about
savouring. The participants will learn how to experience positive emotions by looking back
into the past or the coming future.
For this chapter the participants are asked to dive into their photo albums from the past
and to mark the photos that spark out a good feeling in order to put them into a new album
(this can be a folder on the phone etc.). After completing this album with around 20 pictures
the participants are going to write a letter from or to their future selves.
Chapter 6: The Reward
→ approx. 50 min
The goal of the sixth chapter is to give the participant a reward for their hard work the
past days by letting them experience gratitude. This sixth chapter consists of three parts.
First the participants are asked to fill out a questionnaire that will help to reflect on a person
that is important to them and on the relationship that they share. All the questions are focused
on clarifying why they are grateful to have that person in their lives. After completing the
questionnaire the participants are asked to write a letter to the person they have chosen in
which they express their gratitude for them.
In the second part of the chapter the participants are asked to reach out to the receiver
of the letter and share their thoughts with them. A reflection of the feelings the participants
gained from this experience is the third and last part of chapter six.
Chapter 7: Remember the journey (Totem)
→ approx. 10 min
To remember their journey, the last thing that the participants can do is to make a
totem. This is a representation of the adventure they went through and something to remind
them of the lessons they have learned. One possible suggestion is that the participants frame
the letter that they wrote to themselves in chapter five and put it at a place that they see often.
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Running Head: THE JOURNEY TO YOUR INNER HERO

The Journey to Your Inner Hero

Dané Kruyver, Vanessa M. Dietzschold, Bart Koopman, Lisa Norbiato,

Whitney West & Katharina Mai

Amsterdam University of Applied Sciences (HvA)

Explanation of PERMA and Relationships/meaning (Why we chose them) 5

How to strengthen the relationship with yourself? 13

Love and kindness meditation 13

About the intervention 21

Chapter 1: Call to Adventure 23

Chapter 2: Meeting with the mentor 24

Chapter 3: Refusal of the Call 24

Chapter 4: Allies and Enemies 25

Chapter 5: Facing Yourself 25

Chapter 6: The Reward 26

Chapter 7: Remember the journey (Totem) 26

relationship with others is followed by several proven psychological interventions focused on

before moving on to the intervention design and script.

fundamentally social beings, since social psychologist and neuroscientist; Matthew

Through the experience of living in self-quarantine conditions amidst the COVID-19

platform for meaningful relationships.

self-development. We choose this audience because we took ourselves as a reference point

to be an expert on reflecting, mediating or wiring to complete this workbook. We simply want

sexuality are of no relevance.

Explanation of PERMA and Relationships/meaning (Why we chose them)

PERMA is an acronym that is used to describe a scientific theory of happiness created

Positive Emotions pillar of PERMA focuses on experiencing positivity and happiness in

the goal or the centrep​iece of Seligman’s well-being theory (Seligman, 2011).

The second pillar of PERMA’s scientific theory for happiness is Engagement.

create an engaging concentration in order to ground us from a hectic attention span.

intelligence, empathy, listening, emotional awareness, authenticity, self-regulation, kindness,

gratitude, and motivation. “Relationship Motivation Theory (RMT) posits a basic

am I supposed to be doing?”. Meaning, along with Positive Emotions, is subjective to every

relationships in one’s life is also largely associated with feelings of meaning.

accomplishment” ​(Pascha, 2020). It is important to be continuously working towards short

satisfaction when achieving the said goals.

discussed in the following chapter.

oneself. Furthermore, self-esteem is a concept that pictures a person’s attitude towards, or

presenter of the relationship that we have with ourselves.

question why self-esteem exists.

According to “The Terror-Management-Theory '' (Greenberg, Pyszczynski, &

feels as a valuable contributor to a meaningful world (Becker, 1973) and as a result,

Terror-Management-Theory understands self-esteem as a cultural and social construct, which

according to the Terror-Management-Theory, self-esteem is a construct that seeks and

oneself. As a consequence an increase of self-esteem is associated with the loss of social

bonds, as well as with social exclusion.

existence of human beings. Furthermore, self-esteem can be understood as an instrument,

maintaining a strong connection in romantic relationships, especially during difficult times

relationships low self-esteem (CMHC) as well as a very high self-esteem (especially

narcissism) seem largely detrimental (Campbell & Baumeister, 2004).

McKay self-compassion is the essence of healthy self-esteem (McKay, 2000). Compared to

self-esteem, which pretty much concentrates on our social environment, self-compassion

however faces inwards.

feelings (Neff, 2003). Referring to Kristin Neff, self-compassion is defined by three

self-compassion has an extremely beneficial influence on ourselves (McKay, 2000).

How to strengthen the relationship with yourself?

exercises, techniques or practices turn out to be very effective in strengthening the

relationship with yourself.

Love and kindness meditation

shown a significant increase in positive emotions and subsequent building of personal

● Someone you feel neutral about;

● Someone you feel hard to be with or even hate;

the goal or the centrepiece of Seligman’s well-being theory (Seligman, 2011).

accomplishment” (Pascha, 2020). It is important to be continuously working towards short

1. Personalizing: When things go wrong, you blame yourself.

4. Catastrophizing: Always expecting the worst.

website (https://journeytoyourinnerhero.weebly.com/) and can be downloaded beforehand. In

(https://www.facebook.com/groups/2071839052959510/), where we will happily answer all