Freyja Lundquist

Ms. Christensen

English 10

28 May 2020

What They Don’t Tell You About The Final

I sit at my desk, my leg uncontrollably bouncing with nerves. I feel beads of sweat forming on my

forehead, creased with worry. ​As I stare blankly at my paper, all knowledge erases from my brain like

birds fleeing from a gunshot.​ This semester, the past two weeks of countless hours spent studying, all

boiled down to this 90 minutes. I glance around the room that seems to be filled with distractions. I can

suddenly hear the 20 pencils scribbling frantically, trying to complete the exam in time. Forget

stoichiometry, the only thing I can think of is how I’m wasting time. I try to clear my thoughts and put my

pencil to the paper. I aimlessly try to reassure myself and whisper, “You’ve got this, you studied and

worked hard. Just focus.” That’s how the most trying exam of my life began.

I always have been interested in science. In fact, I’ve prided myself in how easily it comes to me.

That was before Chemistry X. ​I grasped at straws, trying to understand everything that was thrown at me

and repeat the process, like a juggler​. I was now faced with the ultimate task of demonstrating all of my

new knowledge of the past 4 months onto one 67 question test. My grade was a high B before the final.

My parents and friends say it’s not that bad, but I’m a perfectionist when it comes to academics. My

report card needs to be up to my standards, and the bar is high. My own crazy goal fills the back of my

mind, tapping on my skull, never letting me forget how much is riding on this one test.

As I flip the first page, the piercing white paper feels like sandpaper against my bone dry hands. I

do the math in my head, “​Okay, so if I can get 62 out of 67, I could raise my overall grade by 2.3%. I

wasn’t sure about one question on the last page, so that gives me four more questions I can possibly get
wrong.​ ” As I view the next pages’ topic, a small wave of relief washes over me. I relish the moment. I

may not be the best at stoichiometry, but thermochemistry I can do. ​I scan the page, my eyes lazers​. I

speed through this part as quickly as possible to save more time for what's to come. Done. I take a deep

breath as a reward for reaching the halfway mark. Only two more pages to go.

As I’m turning to the third page, I catch a glance at the clock hanging above the door. My breath

hitches in my throat. I only have 35 minutes left. I’m already ten minutes behind schedule, and I haven’t

even gotten to the hardest part of the test yet. I quickly glance down at my paper and to my horror, I

discover I have approached the most challenging portion of the exam. Kinetic molecular theory. My hand

starts to develop a tremor as I glance back up at the clock. I watch the red second hand tick away. ​Tick,

one less second to solidify my grade and meet my expectations. Tok, one more second my anxiety

controls me. Tick tock, tick tock. ​I rip myself away from the clock and back onto the paper. I suddenly

become very aware of my surroundings. ​The smell of lemon Lysol wipes assaults my nose as I feel a

headache start to creep into the back of my head​. I breath through my mouth in an effort to try and escape

the smell. I peer at the icy white paper and get to work. I refuse to let my emotions get the better of me.

Finishing the test is my only priority.

I struggle through my most feared foe, kinetic molecular theory, and somehow make it out the

other side. I triumphantly turn to the last page of my final. My teacher walks up to the front of the room

and declares, “Class, you have 10 more minutes to complete your exams. If your pencil is in your hand

after the time is up, your entire test is invalidated.” Any confidence or comfort I feel is whisked out of me,

and I was left empty. I frantically speed through my last 10 questions. “One question, one minuet.” I

whisper repeatedly, like just saying the phrase will increase my speed. My hand aches, the pencil now

slippery in my once dry hands. I steal a moment to look at the time. Two more minutes. Just one question

left. I circle answer C and drop my pencil in celebration. I march up to the front of the room and hand in
my test. An invisible weight is lifted off my chest as the paper leaves my hands. No matter what happens

now, it’s out of my hands.

Walking out of that classroom for the last time, I felt like I was on top of the world. I put my all

into every test, every quiz, every day. It was one of the first times where I really had to work for a grade. I

learned so much more than chemistry in that class. If you’re willing to put in the time and effort, you will

see results. I also learned that it’s okay to fail sometimes. It’s what makes you stronger, you grow from it

and learn what works and what doesn’t. I ended the class with an A-, and it’s one of my proudest

academic achievements, as well as a personal one.

 Addendum

1. “As I stared blankly at my paper, all knowledge fled my brain like birds fleeing from a gunshot”

Type of literary device- simile

Impact- The use of the simile was to create an image of how quickly my brain was wiped clean of

all information in that moment. Birds flying away from a threat is something everyone has seen

and that creates a frantic and chaotic image.

2. “I grasped at straws, trying to understand everything that was thrown at me and repeat the

process, like a juggler.”

Type of literary device- simile

Impact- A juggler controls many objects at once with ease and is a great example of multitasking.

My goal was to understand many different new subjects at once, and not drop the ball so to say.

3. “I scan the page, my eyes lazers.”

Type of literary device- metaphor

Impact- Lazers, at least for me, are associated with education, teachers using lazer pointers in

their lessons. Their purpose is to help improve focus, and I was trying to lazer focus on a single

page of my test.

4. “Tick, one less second to solidify my grade and meet my expectations. Tok, one more second my

anxiety controlled me. Tick tock, tick tock.”

Type of literary device- repetition

Impact- Through repetition, the desired impact was to convey the feeling of anxiety I was feeling

at the time. Seeing and hearing time pass while in a time crunch is something I find very nerve

wracking. The noise and visual of the clock is meant to create that emotion.

5. “The smell of lemon Lysol wipes assaults my nose as I feel a headache start to creep into the back

of my head.”
Type of literary device- imagery

Impact- I specifically used the sense of smell for this imagery. Lemon Lysol wipes are a school

stapel, always being used to clean off desks. The smell can become overwhelming, and using

imagery here helps make the smell seem very encroaching and potent.