Professional Documents
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AAAAA Newspaper
AAAAA Newspaper
AAAAA Newspaper
14 SEP 2020
round three last Wednesday, facing Nigerian Tommy Thompson is sprinting fifty miles a day and carry-
off against title-holder Paulo "Spine- also a relative newcomer to the ing my daughter’s car to the end of
Snapper" Lutti, of Vatican City. Un- wrestling scene, but with his 210lb the road and back whenever I felt my
derdog Johnson was soon showing her frame he was expected to fare well arthritis was OK" she said. Sammy
worth with stamina and agility easily against Johnson who weighs in at added "I always knew she could do
matching last year’s winner. Lutti’s only 90lb. However Johnson’s lithe it. She’s my grandma.". The young-
experience paid off initially as he took and slender, some would say scrawny, ster is also her manager and has re-
the first two rounds, but as John- figure belies her agility and strength portedly arranged sponsorship deals
son became more confident her su- which she demonstrated by holding which will dwarf her one million dol-
perior strength came to the fore and Thompson above her head several lar prize fund. Her new contract with
she clawed back two rounds to take times during the bout and throwing headband designer Nike alone is set
the contest into a decider. By this him into the crowd once. With the to earn her fourteen billion dollars
time Lutti’s body language indicated scores tied at 2-2 time ran out and the over the next year. She will also be
that he already felt overawed by the contest went to a panel of judges to be promoting Tupperware, Halliburton,
pretender to his crown, and the new- assessed. They awarded Thompson a the Republic of Macedonia, and Gala
comer took advantage of this to en- C grade whilst Johnson received an Bingo. Her continued participation in
gage a mutual headlock which she A, becoming the first grandmother to the sport is not assured as she wants
held for three hours until the Vat- ever win the title. to spend more time on her bungee-
ican man retired from exhaustion. The new champion explained her jumping business, and knitting. Ev-
The next seven matches were barely success as the result of a strict train- eryone here at the World Champi-
a contest as the news of Johnson’s ing regimen instituted by her coach onships, however, hopes for her re-
supremacy overawed all her oppo- and grandson five-year-old Sammy turn.
nents who became too indimidated to Johnson. "I’ve been drinking ten
fight properly. raw eggs for breakfast every morning,